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Where Have All the Good Men Gone? - Stand Firm and Act Like Men: Wk 1 — Transcript

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0:00Like men.
0:05Oh, let's go. Let's go. Let's go.
0:08Amen and amen and amen. Hey, if you got
0:10your Bibles, and I hope you do,
0:12this ought to be easy for you, even if
0:14you're new to Bible study. We're going
0:15to go to Genesis. You can find it. It's
0:17in the beginning. Got it? Go there.
0:20I hope you're ready to stand firm and
0:21act like men. We have been here all
0:23weekend. It is so good, ladies, to see
0:25you in this room. I'm telling you.
0:29I mean, it's great to have 3,000 men in
0:30this place, but I ain't going to lie, I
0:31started smelling like beef and cheese
0:33last night, all right? So,
0:35it's really good to see you all here.
0:39Uh and I know we got a bunch of folks
0:40that are visiting that came to the
0:41conference and you're still hanging out,
0:43man. I'm so glad that you were here. We
0:45got a brother from Dillon, South
0:46Carolina, right back there. Can you
0:47believe that? Praise God. Here's what's
0:50crazy. He's going back. That's what's
0:52crazy.
0:54Also, my guy Drew Parker sitting over
0:56here on the front row. Uh
0:59you know Drew, hopefully. Big-time
1:01country music artist. I've been
1:02discipled in that cat for about, I don't
1:04know, a year, something like that. And
1:05he felt called of God to walk away from
1:07his regular country music career, walk
1:10out of his contract and everything, and
1:12only write country music that just
1:14preaches the gospel and gives glory to
1:16Jesus. And that song "Blame Jesus" that
1:18you heard is his. It just released this
1:21week. And so, I want every one of you to
1:22get out your phone and download the song
1:26by Drew Parker called "Blame Jesus." Do
1:28it right now. Let's blow this thing up,
1:30all right? And let's get the whole world
1:32listening to some good grown men country
1:34worship music. Praise God. Amen?
1:36Um all right, for the next seven weeks,
1:39we're going to talk about what it means
1:40to stand firm and act like men.
1:43And
1:45and I know some of you may be asking,
1:48well, actually, I haven't had one woman
1:49at our church go, well, what about us?
1:51You know why?
1:52Cuz godly women don't ask, what about
1:53me? Godly women ask, how can we help?
1:56And you guys have been so incredibly
1:58helpful. But let me tell you what I do
2:00from you and what I don't need from you
2:02over the next seven weeks.
2:04All right? I'm here to help. I promise.
2:07Single ladies,
2:08I'm here to help, all right? I'm going
2:10to try to I'm hoping and praying.
2:12Somebody's asked me what my goal is in
2:14this series. One of the my goals is that
2:161 year from now, we've got a bunch of
2:18men that have gotten their knee dirty
2:19because they stood up and acted like
2:21men, they popped the question, and we're
2:22doing a bunch of weddings. Praise God.
2:24There you go. All right, I'm here.
2:27Married women, what I don't need from
2:29you over the next seven weeks is,
2:31"Preach it, brother." Okay?
2:35Also, I'd highly encourage you,
2:38you don't need to bring up the sermon
2:40at home at all over the next seven
2:43weeks, okay?
2:45Because if your man has half a brain
2:47cell, which I know it's a big if,
2:50but if the tomb is empty, anything is
2:51possible.
2:53He's going to begin to step INTO SPACES
2:55AND PLACES THAT HE HADN'T been since the
2:57Reagan administration, all right?
3:00And what I don't need you to do at that
3:02point is be like, well, I can't believe
3:03you're finally trying to take me out to
3:04the Dairy Queen. Where were you during
3:06the Elijah series? Whoa, whoa, whoa, you
3:08know, settle down, mama.
3:10Your response over the next seven weeks,
3:12the most helpful thing you could do is
3:14this right here. Ready? Hercules,
3:16Hercules. That's what we need, okay? Cuz
3:18we need help. We need encouragement.
3:22And one of the things that we have
3:24provided to help is this. Is that my
3:26wife, Gretchen, has written a series of
3:28devotionals for the next seven weeks
3:31aimed directly at the women of the
3:33Church of 11:22. Now, listen, boys, if
3:36you don't read these things, you're too
3:37dumb to talk to, okay? Because they're
3:40just Bible verses, and it's true for all
3:42of us, but the intended audience is for
3:45women. And if you will just text the
3:47word "devo" to 441122,
3:49then you'll get these ladies, and they
3:51will correspond with the weeks that
3:52we're talking about as we talk about
3:54what it means to stand firm and act like
3:56men.
3:57So, that's where we're going to be for
3:58the next seven weeks. What does it look
4:00like to stand firm and act like men?
4:03Well, I stole that title from the Bible.
4:051 Corinthians chapter 16:13 and 14 says
4:07this,
4:08"Be watchful, stand firm in the faith,
4:10act like men, be strong. Let all that
4:13you do be done in love." And the way to
4:15best understand that verse, in my
4:16opinion, is that phrase "act like men"
4:19is like the hub of the middle of the
4:21wheel, and the imperatives around it are
4:23how we are to act like men.
4:26And here's what's crazy. I taught this
4:28series, a version of the series, nine
4:30years ago.
4:32And you think about how much has changed
4:34in the last nine years.
4:39Nine years ago, I didn't even have to
4:40answer the question, what is a man?
4:44These days, we have people in very high
4:47positions of power in our government and
4:50country that can't even answer the
4:51question about what's the difference
4:53between a male and a female.
4:55Do you realize there's not a 3-year-old
4:57on the planet that unless you're trying
4:59to trick them, that they can't determine
5:01the difference between the mommies and
5:02the daddies? And we have Supreme Court
5:04justices that can't understand the
5:06difference.
5:07We live in a lunatic society right now.
5:10So, biologically speaking, okay? Bottom
5:13shelf, we're talking about adult human
5:15males. That's what a man is.
5:17But biblically, it takes a lot more to
5:20be a man than just having an XY
5:23chromosome.
5:24So, the question is, what is a man?
5:26Well, I'm a man.
5:28I've been one for a long time.
5:31And um there's a lot of things about me.
5:35I love to hunt. I love to fish. My
5:37favorite color is camo. I love the
5:39bulldogs. I love my wife. I love my
5:40kids. I got a bunch of tattoos. I work
5:42out. I drive a Harley.
5:44I got guns, a lot of them, more than I
5:47have fingers. Could have one on me right
5:49now. That's just true.
5:51I do the majority of my grocery shopping
5:53with a stick and a string. I love
5:54chicken wings. I love cold beer. That's
5:56right. Not too much, just the right
5:58amount.
6:01And none of that makes me a man.
6:03It makes me awesome,
6:07but not a man.
6:09That you could be a scoop-neck, skinny
6:11jean, scarf-wearing vegan sipping a
6:13latte at your hipster coffee shop, and
6:15theoretically, you too could be a man,
6:18all right?
6:20Cuz one of the things I really want to
6:21avoid in this
6:23is, you've heard me say this 10,000
6:25times, for every mile of road, there's 2
6:27miles of ditch. And over the over the
6:29last several years, what we've seen a
6:31lot of is a bunch of men abdicating
6:33responsibility for manhood and just
6:35laying on the couch and being and doing
6:37really doing nothing and anything manly
6:39being called toxic. And in the last 2
6:42years, really, you've seen this this
6:44kind of resurgence of the alpha male. No
6:46problem with that and praise God for
6:47that. But if all we do is come out of
6:50the ditch of abdication and just wreck
6:53our truck in the other ditch of
6:55aggression and abuse, that is not what
6:57it means to be a man.
6:59So, this whole series is not about a
7:01bunch of chest-beating. This whole
7:03series is not like, "Man up and cowboy
7:06up and be the kind of man I am." No, no,
7:07no, no. This is the series where we are
7:09calling people to be the kind of man the
7:11Bible has called us to be.
7:13That a man is a prophet, priest,
7:15servant, king, provider, and protector.
7:19But men, we make no apologies
7:22for being a man. Because it was God's
7:24idea that he created you as a man.
7:27Genesis chapter 1:26 and 27 says this,
7:31"Then God said, 'Let us make man in our
7:33image and after our likeness.' By the
7:36way, image is masculine and likeness is
7:39feminine.
7:40And let them have dominion over the fish
7:42of the sea and over the birds of the
7:43heavens and over the livestock and over
7:45all the earth and over every creeping
7:47thing that creeps on the earth." Verse
7:4827, "So, God created man in his own
7:51image.
7:52In the image of God, he created him."
7:54Now, check this out. This is very
7:55binary.
7:56"Male and female he created them."
8:01An attack on gender is an attack on the
8:03character and nature of God.
8:06And listen to me. And if you're confused
8:07about your gender,
8:09I am not here to beat you up, not at
8:11all. I love you, and we want to help.
8:14And God is not a god of confusion, and
8:17he loves you, and he knows what he's
8:19doing when he created you. And what we
8:22need to do is not try to
8:25align our bodies with our own mind. What
8:28we need to do is align our bodies to
8:29mind with God's created order, and that
8:32is the best thing for us.
8:35So, if manhood is God's idea, then
8:37you've got to ask, well,
8:39well, what went wrong?
8:41I mean, what in the world happened? How
8:43in the world have we gone from
8:45from the Apostle Paul and William
8:47Wallace and John Wayne
8:50to grown men with beards and dresses
8:52mocking the Lord's Supper at the Summer
8:54Olympics?
8:56What went wrong? Well, there's a lot.
8:59Quite honestly, the first time I ever
9:00heard some of this content was from a
9:02friend of mine now. His name is John
9:03Bryson. I heard him at an Acts 29
9:05conference, probably like 15 years ago.
9:07And the ultimate answer of what went
9:09wrong is this, sin. Sin went wrong. And
9:11we could talk about how those things
9:13have been manifested in our society over
9:14the last couple hundred years. You could
9:17talk about the racialization of our
9:19society and how it ripped families
9:20apart. We could talk about the
9:21Industrial Revolution that separated
9:24families. This is where things like the
9:25Lazy Boy and the lunchbox were created,
9:27and the best hours of men's day, they
9:30were off working in some factory instead
9:32of raising kids. We could talk about the
9:34woke mind virus that has infected our
9:37world lately where our our our society
9:39has lost its ever-loving mind.
9:41Do you realize that we are one of the
9:43very few societies in all of history
9:47that have no process by which we declare
9:49boys becoming men.
9:52A long time ago, when I was in seminary,
9:54back in the 1900s, um I spent
9:58I spent an entire semester, a whole
9:59summer I spent in uh
10:01in Eastern Africa. And one of the things
10:03that we did is we spent time with the
10:05Masai tribe, bunch of warriors.
10:08And it was really great. There was about
10:0912 or 14 of us from my seminary and we
10:11were all there and I was the only one
10:13that got invited to the inside of the
10:15village because as they looked at the
10:17seminarians, I was the only one that
10:18they felt like looked anything like a
10:20warrior.
10:21And if you had been to seminary, you
10:23know exactly what I'm talking about,
10:24okay?
10:26And so, when I was meeting with the
10:28tribal chieftain, he asked me, "In your
10:30culture, when does a boy become a man?"
10:33And I thought, "Man, that's a really
10:34good I don't know."
10:36I mean, think about it. In America, when
10:37does a boy become a man?
10:39Depends on who you ask.
10:41I mean, Obamacare says 26.
10:4425, you can live on your mama's
10:46insurance. 26, you got to get your own.
10:48Budweiser says 21.
10:50United States Army, 18. Xbox says 17.
10:54By the way, there's no such thing as a
10:55mature video game. You should jot that
10:56down, all right? The DMV says 16. Disney
11:00says 10. You got to pay adult prices at
11:0210.
11:03The only place I could find any
11:04agreement in our culture is both Disney
11:07and Delta Airlines agree, 2 years old
11:10and you're an adult.
11:12Do you realize for the first time in all
11:14of human history
11:16that we don't know what when it when a
11:19boy becomes a man. In fact, until about
11:2275 years ago, there were only two
11:24classifications of male. You were either
11:26a boy or you were you were a man. And it
11:29takes men to bestow manhood upon a
11:32generation of boys.
11:34Right now, we've got a bunch of boys
11:36trying to bestow manhood on other boys
11:38and the way boys define it is by how
11:40much they can consume.
11:43What it means to be a man, it means to
11:44take responsibility. And this delayed
11:47manhood is what sociologists calls
11:51adolescence.
11:52It's kind of this middle ground.
11:55It's like physically a man but takes the
11:57responsibility of a boy. Sort of a boy,
11:59sort of a man. I call it a dude.
12:03And a dude is a dangerous thing.
12:05A dude is like a boy that can shave.
12:09Listen, my daddy used to tell me men are
12:10like flatbed trucks. They drive straight
12:12in with a heavy load, amen?
12:14And the problem is is when you got boys
12:16trying to bestow manhood upon other
12:17boys, then it's all about how much can I
12:19consume. It makes me a man if I can make
12:22more money or where I'm from, drive the
12:23biggest truck or have the biggest
12:25muscles or drink the most beer or sleep
12:27with the most girls. And it is a crisis
12:29that we have.
12:31So, what's gone wrong? Well, there's
12:33been a couple of responses to this
12:34manhood crisis.
12:36One is we live in this kooky world that
12:38says, "Well, you know, it's there's
12:40really no difference between men or
12:41women. Everybody's just kind of the same
12:43and there's a spectrum and you can
12:44switch teams at any time you want." And
12:47that's crazy. I mean, absolutely crazy.
12:50I don't know if you realize this but
12:51boys and girls are different.
12:54I've raised one of each. They couldn't
12:56be more different.
12:58And generalities are generally true.
13:01When pine cones would fall off the tree
13:03in my backyard, JP would make them
13:04grenades.
13:06Reagan would make them friends.
13:11And boys and girls, males and females,
13:13we image God differently. And right now,
13:17we've got a bunch of parents that don't
13:19know what to do with these little boys
13:21because they're rambunctious and they
13:23want to be outside and they want to
13:25break stuff and they want adventure and
13:28they want risk and they want all these
13:30things. And I've got some mamas,
13:31especially single mamas, God bless you.
13:33And they say, "What's wrong with my
13:35boy?"
13:36And I tell them, "There's nothing wrong
13:37with your boy.
13:39Your boy is an image bearer of the most
13:40high God and the Bible says that the
13:42Lord is a warrior and the Lord is his
13:43name."
13:44I had a mama out here
13:46I mean, sweet, sweet, sweet mom.
13:49Asking very good mom questions, a single
13:51mom. And she says, "My son wants to play
13:53with little guns but it makes me so
13:55nervous."
13:56And I'm like, "Listen, mama, if you
13:57don't give little Timmy guns, here's
13:59what he's going to do. Every stick that
14:01falls out of the trees going to become a
14:03bazooka. He's going to chew his girl
14:04cheese into a Glock 9 because the the
14:07boy is a warrior, the Lord is his name.
14:09And the reason that you let little Timmy
14:11play with the Nerf guns today is cuz
14:13there may be a day where he's going to
14:15lay down those toy guns and pick up real
14:17guns and sit on a wall to defend and
14:19protect our freedom so that we can
14:21gather here and worship Jesus freely.
14:25There's nothing wrong with the boy. God
14:27did that to him."
14:28[Applause]
14:30Now, listen. And quite honestly, this
14:31got me in a lot of trouble before. So,
14:33let me make sure I say it again for
14:34those of you in the back.
14:36And the church has not been a lot of
14:38help in the last 100 years.
14:40Cuz a lot of churches have asked men to
14:42come in and act like women.
14:45And listen, man, there's no doubt women
14:46are better than men. I mean, it's not
14:48even close. Look at you. Like literally,
14:50look at the dude you're sitting next to.
14:52Look at you.
14:54It's not even close.
14:57But the church has called a lot of men
14:58to come in and act like women. They
14:59think the 11th commandment is be nice.
15:02And so, we tell men, "All right, here's
15:04what it means to be a Christian, okay?
15:05We just want you to come in, be quiet,
15:07be nice.
15:08We're going to sing some promise songs
15:09to Jesus. We're going to sit in circles,
15:11talk about our feelings. Here's a robe."
15:14I don't think I would do that either,
15:15bro.
15:17This is why this church, we call men to
15:18act like men. This is what I've told you
15:20before. Listen, um all of my shirts look
15:22basically the same. They're snap button
15:24button shirts. That's what I have. If I
15:25put on one of my shirts, I look fine. I
15:27don't look great. I can't do great. This
15:28is all I have. I look fine.
15:31When Gretchen puts on one of her shirts,
15:33she looks great.
15:34If I get home today and Gretchen's got
15:36one of my shirts on, guess what? She
15:37looks great.
15:40If she comes home and I've got on one of
15:41her blouse, not great.
15:46And for too long, the church has been a
15:47blouse.
15:49Listen, I'm here to tell you that we're
15:51saved, not soft.
15:54Let me put it on the bottom shelf, okay?
15:56Gentlemen, you do not have to check your
15:57testicles at the door in order in order
15:59to follow after Jesus. In fact, those
16:01were his idea, too. You got to grow a
16:03pair, stand up and act like men. But the
16:06strength that God has given us is not
16:08for us.
16:12And when men lead in love well,
16:14everybody flourishes. Of course,
16:16everything God creates, the enemy
16:18corrupts. And we've seen all kind of men
16:20misuse their masculinity, but that is
16:23not what we have been called to.
16:26So, God formed you on purpose. And when
16:29something has gone this wrong, sometimes
16:31you got to go all the way back to the
16:33beginning to its origin to see what its
16:36purpose is.
16:37So, in Genesis chapter 2, we got to go
16:39really, really fast here. You got to
16:40listen faster than you normally do.
16:42Genesis 2:5, the Bible says this.
16:45When no bush of the field was yet in the
16:47land and no small plant of the field had
16:49yet sprung up, for the Lord God had not
16:51caused it to rain on the land. And there
16:53was no man to work the ground and a mist
16:55was going up from the land and was
16:57watering the whole face of the ground.
16:58For the Lord God formed the man.
17:02Everything else he spoke into existence.
17:04But when he creates the very first man,
17:06he forms him together
17:09of the dust of the ground. The word dust
17:11in Hebrew is adamah, which is where we
17:12get the name Adam.
17:15Of the dust of the ground and he
17:17breathed into his nostrils the breath of
17:20life. That word for breath, you know
17:22this, is ruach.
17:24And the man became a living creature.
17:26That word ruach can be translated breath
17:28or spirit.
17:29And so, when God forms the very first
17:31man, he is a shell of a male but he is
17:35not yet a man of God.
17:39I know it I know in in our campuses,
17:42everywhere from Orlando to Brunswick and
17:43everywhere in between and those of you
17:45watching in prison and online and on
17:47Pando, there's a whole bunch of people
17:49that are showing up this weekend.
17:51And externally, you are the shell of a
17:53male but you have yet to receive the
17:56spirit of God and you are not the man
17:58that God has called you to be yet.
18:01You're like what C.S. Lewis would call
18:02men without chests.
18:05And then what God wants us to know is
18:07that he gets face to face with his very
18:09first creation.
18:11This is not a This is not a Steph Curry
18:13three-pointer from the third heaven.
18:14This is nostril to nostril. And he
18:16breathes
18:18the ruach of God and then Adam opens his
18:22eyes and he's face to face with his
18:23heavenly Father.
18:25And that's what every single one of us
18:27were created for.
18:30And without him, you can't be who God
18:31wants you to be.
18:33This is why the temporary things of this
18:34world will never satisfy.
18:37Fellas, some of you are crushing it,
18:38man.
18:40I mean, you realize one of you in this
18:41room is the richest guy in this room. Do
18:44you realize this?
18:46Think about it.
18:47It ain't me. I promise you, I'm in
18:48ministry, all right? One of you is the
18:50richest guy in this room. And I don't
18:52care how much money you make, you're
18:53going to lay your head on the pillow and
18:55think, "Is this it?"
18:56That ain't it. You were created for
18:58more.
18:59One of you guys is the strongest guy in
19:01this room. Also not me. I'm 52 years
19:03old, okay? So, it ain't going to be me
19:04ever again.
19:06And I don't care how much you can bench
19:07or squat or rock or whatever,
19:09eventually, time and gravity ain't your
19:11friend.
19:12You're going to lose it.
19:14One of you fellas is the best looking
19:16guy in the room, obviously me and the
19:17most humble. So,
19:23and none of the temporary things in this
19:25world will scratch that eternal itch
19:26that God put in you.
19:29Verse 8, "And the Lord God planted a
19:30garden in the Eden in the east." And
19:32check this out. "And there he put the
19:34man he had formed." Notice, the man was
19:36not created in the garden. The woman's
19:38going to be created in the garden. The
19:39man was created out in the wilderness. I
19:41hope that makes a bunch of sense to you.
19:43I didn't make that up. The first time I
19:44read that was John Eldredge in Wild at
19:46Heart, a great book.
19:47This is why men honestly, this is why I
19:49go out into the woods to meet with the
19:50Lord.
19:52Years ago, we were on a hunting
19:53encounter and my man Matt Cookingham
19:55Cookie sitting right here on the corner
19:57with a really good look, bald and gray
19:58beard.
20:00Wise, wise, good-looking fellow right
20:02over there.
20:04And we'd been hunting I said, "Do you
20:05see anything?" He said, "No, I didn't
20:07see anything but the devil didn't see me
20:10because it's hard for the devil to find
20:11you in the woods. Amen?"
20:13You see, we were created out in the
20:16wilderness and placed into the garden.
20:19Verse 9
20:21And out of the ground the Lord God made
20:23to spring up every tree that is pleasant
20:25to sight and good for food. The tree of
20:28life is in the midst of the garden and
20:29the tree of the knowledge of good and
20:30evil. And then what God is going to do
20:32is God is going to give Adam three
20:34things under the banner of worship. And
20:38this is the responsibility that God is
20:40giving the very first man. Check this
20:42out.
20:43And the Lord God took the man and put
20:44him in the Garden of Eden to work it and
20:46keep it. The first thing that God gives
20:48every man is this, work to enjoy.
20:51Work to enjoy. Work is not a result of
20:54the fall. Work is a gift of God.
20:57That work is given us by God that we
21:00have been called as co-creators with God
21:02to subdue and cultivate.
21:05That what we have been called to do is
21:07join God to rearrange the raw goods of
21:10this world through human flourishing
21:12which by the way means there is no such
21:14thing as a sacred secular divide.
21:17It's not like my job is holy cuz I teach
21:19the Bible on the weekends and your job
21:21is secular because you do whatever you
21:23do.
21:24Hey listen, I mean like you might build
21:26houses or have some part of this. You
21:28realize you're not just rearranging
21:30sticks and stones, you are participating
21:32with God to create the kind of
21:34environment whereby God can raise up
21:37families. Do you realize what a big deal
21:39that is?
21:41And so work is given to us by God as a
21:44gift.
21:47And listen,
21:49like my daddy said again, men are like
21:51flatbed trucks, they drive better with a
21:53heavy load.
21:54And boys, you don't just need a job, you
21:57need a career.
21:59But while you're looking for that
22:00career, you need a job.
22:02You got to get out and do something.
22:04You can't just sit on your couch and
22:06vote for people that'll pay you to sit
22:07on your couch. That's not your job.
22:10We have to participate with God in work.
22:14Listen, I told you before, when I was in
22:16college, I was
22:17I was in the pre-med program.
22:19Which is hilarious. I just got into
22:20medical. Can you imagine if I was your
22:22doctor?
22:25I don't know why you're laughing. You
22:26hurt my feelings, but anyway,
22:28I'd be terrible, but I'd be efficient,
22:30okay?
22:31I'd be an orthopedic, that's what I
22:32would do. And you come in, be like,
22:33"Hey, my shoulder hurts when I do that."
22:35I'm like, "All right, don't do that.
22:36That'll be a half a million dollars. All
22:37right, next." That's what we'd do.
22:40And then God called me out of that,
22:41called me to go to ministry and I had to
22:42go tell my dad, "I'm not going to med
22:43school, I'm going to seminary." So I
22:45took him to Subway and we sat down.
22:48I said, "Daddy, I'm going to go to
22:49seminary." He said, "What's seminary?"
22:51I said, "It's preacher school."
22:52He said, "What? Why you need a school
22:54for that? You only work half a day a
22:55week and study one book." I was like, "I
22:57don't know, but I got to go."
22:59He said, "Well, what are you going to
23:00do?"
23:01And I said, "Well, I'm going to be a
23:02youth pastor."
23:04And then he said this word This should
23:06be a proverb. I'm telling you.
23:08He said, "Listen to me, boy, you don't
23:09get up and go to fun, you get up and go
23:10to work."
23:11Now your work can be fun. There are
23:13times when mine is.
23:16But God has called us to work and this
23:18relentless pursuit of comfort is killing
23:21us
23:22as Americans.
23:24We have been called to grind. We have
23:26been called to go to
23:29work.
23:30I mean, think about this, boys. Do you
23:31know what Paul tells Timothy? Paul tells
23:33Timothy, "A man that does not provide
23:35for his family is worse than an
23:37unbeliever."
23:39What does that even mean?
23:41Where do unbelievers go?
23:43Hell. You can say One guy said hell. You
23:45can say hell. I say it in here all the
23:46time. Hell.
23:48If you don't believe in Jesus, you're
23:49going to hell. I got to mean. What do
23:50you get in hell? It's real bad.
23:53Apparently, there's a basement in hell.
23:57And when unbelievers get there, they're
23:58like, "Oh, you didn't have a job? Come
24:00down here where it's even worse than the
24:02rest of the people dying in the lake of
24:03fire for all eternity."
24:06Yeah, you get up and go to work.
24:08A lazy man is a dangerous thing.
24:11It's what gangs are full of. It's what
24:13prisons are full of.
24:14It's what what casinos are full of. I'm
24:17telling you, dangerous thing.
24:19Think about this. When did David's life
24:21go to hell?
24:23In the time of year when kings went to
24:24war, David was sitting on the couch,
24:27abdicating his responsibility.
24:29And then he began to make decision after
24:30decision after decision that screwed up
24:32everything. The first thing that God has
24:34given every man is work to enjoy.
24:36Verse 16, and the Lord God commanded the
24:38man saying, "You may surely eat of every
24:40tree of the garden." The NIV says, "You
24:43are free to eat of every tree of the
24:46garden, but of the tree of the knowledge
24:47of good and evil you shall not eat, for
24:49in the day that you eat of it you shall
24:51surely die." The second thing that God
24:52has given every man is a will to obey.
24:55It's a will to obey.
24:58That joy is found in the obedience.
25:01That God is the author of life and we do
25:02life God's way, everything goes better.
25:04I'm just telling you.
25:06And in fact, if you think God is a god
25:08of a bunch of rules, you should read
25:10your Bible.
25:11Before sin entered the world, there was
25:14only one thou shalt not.
25:16He said, "I love you enough. If you eat
25:17of that one tree, it'll kill you. So
25:18don't do that. But you can eat of all of
25:21these trees." There were some other very
25:23positive commandments.
25:24Like subdue and cultivate.
25:26My favorite commandment, I've told you
25:28before, man,
25:29was be fruitful and multiply.
25:32That was a commandment. Glory to God.
25:35If you don't know Hebrew, that's Hebrew
25:37for bow chicka wow wow. Praise Jesus. In
25:40the context of marriage.
25:43And listen, man, if that offends you,
25:44you're going to hate it here. So you
25:45should just go ahead and
25:47pray about that. All right?
25:50That God gave us the gift of sex in the
25:52context of marriage for procreation and
25:55recreation. Can I get an amen?
25:59There's some dude here for the first
26:00time like, "Martha, this is my favorite
26:01church I've ever been to." I'm like, "Uh
26:04It's God's idea, man."
26:06He gave us a will to obey.
26:10Verse 18. And then the Lord God said,
26:13"It is not good." This is the first not
26:15good in all of creation.
26:17It's not good that man should be alone.
26:19I will make a helper
26:21fit for him. Boys, do we need help?
26:23Oh Lord, yes.
26:26The third thing that he gives a man is a
26:27woman to love. A woman
26:30to love.
26:32He gives every man work to enjoy, a will
26:34to obey,
26:36and woman to love. Now listen, if you're
26:37a single guy and you're thinking, "Well,
26:39I don't have a woman to love." Yes, you
26:41do. You got your mama.
26:43And you got all of these sisters in
26:45Christ.
26:47And let me tell you, Coach Lee, my
26:48football coach, used to tell me all the
26:49time, "Boy, you play like you practice."
26:52And if you think that you cannot love
26:55the women that God has in your life and
26:56then one day show up on a Saturday with
26:58a tux and make some vow and then all of
27:01a sudden you're going to know how to
27:02love, honor, and cherish this woman,
27:04then you're too dumb to talk to.
27:07And listen,
27:08men, we are called
27:11to be prophet, priest, servant king,
27:13provider, and protector. Prophets tell
27:15the truth. Priests connect people with
27:17God. Servant kings create the kind of
27:19environment whereby the people under our
27:21authority can flourish. We are to
27:23provide and to protect.
27:27It goes on to say, "Now out of the
27:28ground the Lord God had formed every
27:30beast of the field and every bird of the
27:31heavens and brought them to the man to
27:33see what he would call them. And
27:35whatever the man called every living
27:36creature, that was his name."
27:39And the man gave names to all the
27:40livestock and to the birds of the
27:41heavens and every beast of the field,
27:43but for Adam there was not found a
27:45helper fit for him.
27:47So Adam's sitting there
27:48and here comes the animals. And I think
27:50this is just conjectural on my part. I
27:52think he was very creative at first. He
27:53was like, "Duck-billed platypus."
27:55"Rhinoceros."
27:57But eventually, he's like, "Lord, this
27:58ain't doing it to me. Rat, nat, cat,
28:00bat. Let's go. What we got here? All
28:01right?"
28:05And then the Bible says, "So the Lord
28:07God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the
28:08man, and while he slept, he took one of
28:11his ribs and he closed up his place with
28:12flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had
28:14taken from the man he had made into
28:15woman
28:17and brought her to the man."
28:19Notice the order here, single If you're
28:21a single guy, raise your hand as high as
28:22you can.
28:23I'm going to pick on you, but not too
28:25hard, all right? Higher, higher, boys.
28:26Come on. That's why you're single cuz
28:27you're like, "Eh."
28:28Stop.
28:30There. All right? Okay.
28:33Notice the order.
28:35Adam gets his world in order, names all
28:38the animals.
28:39And once his house is in order, then and
28:42only then is he prepared for God to
28:45bring in one of his daughters into that
28:47order that he has created.
28:51Get your life in order.
28:54Sometimes I'm discipling these younger
28:56guys and I'm like, "I wish I had a
28:57girl."
28:58I was like, "Dude, what would you do
28:59with a girl?
29:01You live at your mom's house there,
29:02Scooter."
29:04And then and then they're like, you
29:05know, with that 22-year-old brother,
29:07"Oh, I know what I would do."
29:09All right, Romeo. When that 90 seconds
29:10of dynamite was up, what about the rest
29:13of your life?
29:14I mean, don't you want to live indoors
29:15and eat hot food and be able to raise
29:17people? You understand?
29:19You've got to get your life in order.
29:22Like if you were God, would you trust
29:23you with one of his daughters?
29:26And then once he gets his world in
29:27order,
29:29then God gives him
29:32Eve. Look at verse 23. I hope you got
29:34your Bibles open.
29:35If you'll see this, the the translators
29:37have indented this next part because
29:39they want you to know that these words
29:41are sung.
29:43That this is the first R&B song in the
29:45history of humanity.
29:47That Adam sings, verse 23, when he sees
29:49his naked wife,
29:51then the man said, "This at last."
29:55That's what he says, man.
29:58This is bone of my bones and flesh of my
29:59flesh, and she shall be called woman. It
30:03Man, if you knew Hebrew, you'd laugh out
30:04loud right here. Woman is so close to
30:06the to the word that means mine, not in
30:08a possessive way, but like in a oneness
30:10way.
30:12Like he sees a dog, he's like Labrador,
30:14well, they didn't have golden doodles
30:15and all kind of like demonic mix breeds.
30:17They just had like the one thing.
30:21And then he sees his naked wife and he's
30:22like, "Shotgun! WHOA, MAN." That's what
30:26he says, okay?
30:29Because she was taken out of man,
30:30therefore a man shall leave his father
30:32and mother
30:33and hold fast to his wife, and they
30:34shall become one flesh.
30:37And the man and his wife were both naked
30:39and were not ashamed. Anybody over 40?
30:42You want to see a miracle?
30:44Naked, unashamed.
30:47Unbelievable.
30:48Notice the order here.
30:50First of all, they shall leave father
30:52and mother. Man, that's I should do a
30:54whole sermon series on that, Rebecca
30:55Maxwell.
30:57When you get married, your mom and daddy
30:59have now become your extended family.
31:00They don't get to tell you what to do
31:01anymore.
31:03Your marriage is your family. And you
31:05don't start a family when you start
31:06adding kids, you add to the family that
31:08God created. Notice you leave and
31:11cleave, then you get naked and there is
31:15no shame.
31:16Our culture gets these things backwards
31:18and people get naked before they leave
31:21and cleave, and they bring shame into
31:23their marriage.
31:24And this is God's intended order.
31:27And everything goes awesome
31:30for less than a page in my Bible.
31:33And then what went wrong? Chapter 3,
31:35"Now the serpent was more crafty than
31:36any other beast of the field that the
31:38Lord God had made, and he said to the
31:39woman, 'Did God actually say
31:43You see, the devil is the father of
31:44lies, and he always wants you to
31:46question at least three things: the word
31:48of God, the work of God, and the worth
31:49of God.
31:50He wants to come to you when you want to
31:52do something different than God's
31:53instructions tell us to do, and he wants
31:55you to stand in authority over the word
31:57of God and think you know better than
31:58God.
31:59He wants you to question the word the
32:01work of God. That's you.
32:03He wants you to think when Jesus died on
32:05the cross, it didn't count for you. And
32:07he wants you to question the worth of
32:09God. He wants you to think, "All right,
32:12if if God really loved me, wouldn't he
32:13take better care of me? He's not worthy
32:15of my worship. He's a liar." And he's
32:17That's what he's saying to Eve.
32:19And fundamentally,
32:21what he wants Eve to think, he wants me
32:23and you to think is God is not a good
32:25dad
32:26and that we're not loved by him.
32:29And so he says to the woman, "Did God
32:31actually say you shall not eat of any
32:33tree in the garden?" And the woman said
32:35to the serpent, "We may eat of the fruit
32:37of the trees in the garden, but God said
32:38you shall not eat of the fruit of the
32:40trees in the midst of the garden,
32:41neither shall you touch it lest you
32:43die." This is classic legalism. He
32:44didn't say anything about the touching
32:45part.
32:48But the serpent said to the woman, "You
32:49will not surely die, for God knows that
32:52when you eat of it, your eyes will be
32:53opened and you will be like God, knowing
32:54good and evil."
32:57Listen, if you just know these two
32:59things, it'll change everything about
33:00everything about everything.
33:02That he's a good dad and you were loved
33:05by him.
33:06That's it. He can be trusted, especially
33:08when you don't understand what he tells
33:10you to do.
33:11You see, God loves you and Jesus is the
33:14proof. And everything that the enemy
33:16tells you, he wants to undermine those
33:18truths.
33:19Verse 6, "So,
33:21when the woman saw that the tree was
33:22good for food," that's called lust of
33:23the flesh, "and that it was a delight to
33:25the eyes," that's called lust of the
33:26eyes, "and that the tree was to be
33:29desired to make one wise," that's called
33:31the pride of life,
33:32"she took of its fruit and ate it,
33:34and so also gave some to her husband,
33:37who was" What does it say, fellas?
33:39That's right. You're just as quiet as
33:41Adam. That's the problem. "with her."
33:44The most damning prepositional phrase to
33:46masculinity in all the Bible.
33:48Literally in Hebrew, it means elbow to
33:50elbow.
33:51For the longest time, I thought Adam was
33:53out doing man stuff, you know, grilling
33:55and killing and waxing his bass boat or
33:57something, and then Eve just screwed it
33:58up. That is not the problem.
34:00The problem was Adam standing right
34:03there, elbow to elbow with his wife
34:06while a snake is talking to her, and
34:09it's not that he didn't do something
34:10wrong. He didn't do anything at all.
34:15And he
34:16ate.
34:18Verse 7, "And then the eyes of both were
34:20opened and they knew that they were both
34:22naked, and they sewed fig leaves
34:23together and they made themselves
34:25loincloths."
34:26And the very first religion is born.
34:30You see, what we see right here in
34:31Genesis chapter 3 is that every single
34:33one of us reject God. Some of us reject
34:35God through rebellion,
34:37like the forbidden fruit, I do what I
34:38want, sex, drugs, rock and roll,
34:40rebellion. Some of us reject God through
34:43religion. God, I don't need you. By the
34:46works of my own hands, I can manufacture
34:48something to cover my own sin and shame.
34:51And both of them will separate us from
34:53God.
34:54Check this out. "And they heard the
34:56sound of the Lord God walking in the
34:58garden of the cool of the day, and the
34:59man and his wife hid themselves from the
35:01presence of the Lord God among the trees
35:03of the garden."
35:05But the Lord God called the man and said
35:07to him, "Where are you?" This is such an
35:09important question.
35:12Men, where are you?
35:15I mean, where are you in relationship
35:16with God? I hope you realize this, even
35:19until this day, the God, the creator of
35:21all of the universe, is walking through
35:23the garden of your very life in this
35:25moment, calling out your name, going,
35:28"Where are you?"
35:30And your answer to that will determine
35:32whether you believe the gospel or not.
35:35Here's evidence that you don't believe
35:37the gospel.
35:38When you sin, when you struggle, when
35:40you stumble, when you fall, and you go,
35:42"Oh, no, I've screwed up. Don't tell
35:45dad."
35:46And you run and hide. That means you
35:47don't understand what Christ has done
35:48for us.
35:50The essence of the gospel is, "Oh, no,
35:53I've sinned. I've screwed up.
35:55Somebody call dad. I need help."
35:58And Adam leads his family to run away
36:00from God. God shows up and says, "Where
36:03are you?" Verse 10,
36:06"And Adam said,
36:07'I heard the sound of you in the
36:09garden.'" By the way, notice who God
36:11goes to talk to.
36:12Adam. Adam was not the first to eat, but
36:15Adam was the one that is responsible for
36:17everything that happens in his house.
36:20"And Adam said, 'I heard the sound of
36:21you in the garden and I was afraid
36:23because I was naked and I hid myself.'"
36:25And God said, "Who told you that you
36:27were naked? Have you eaten of the tree
36:30of which I have commanded you not to
36:32eat?" Now, listen.
36:34I think what God is doing here is God is
36:37giving Adam the first opportunity to
36:39stand up and act like a man.
36:41To take responsibility for his what he
36:44has created here. Dads, you ever coach
36:46T-ball?
36:47This is T-ball spirituality right here.
36:51He's like, "All right, buddy, I'm going
36:52to put this thing right here on the tee,
36:54okay?
36:55Who told you you were naked? Now, all
36:58you got to do is go,
37:00'My bad.'
37:02That one's on me. That's my fault."
37:05But then he goes this classic man move,
37:07right? Dodge, dip, duck, dodge. That's
37:12what he's going to do.
37:13He's going to blame three of the four
37:16beings that exist in all of creation at
37:18this point.
37:20"And the man says,
37:22'The woman who you gave to be with me,
37:26she gave me the fruit and I ate it.'"
37:29I mean, you I mean,
37:31one of my friends, mentors, Doug Fields,
37:33said this is This is the lamest thing,
37:35but you'll never forget it. He says,
37:36"Every time that we blame, we just be
37:38lame." That's what it is.
37:41How lame can you be?
37:43He's like, "Who told you?" And then
37:44Adam's like, "Well, you know what, Lord,
37:46uh
37:47I'm not sure if it's her fault or your
37:48fault, but the woman that you gave me,
37:49so tell you what, why don't y'all go
37:51work this out, and when you're ready to
37:52apologize, I'll be over here by the
37:54figs, okay?"
37:57He said, "The woman who you gave to be
37:59with me, she gave me the fruit and I
38:00ate." And then the Lord God said to the
38:02woman, "What is this that you have
38:03done?" And the woman said, "The serpent
38:04deceived me and I ate." She learned it
38:06from her husband.
38:08And then the Lord God says to the
38:09serpent, "Now, what's going to happen in
38:11the next rest of chapter 3 is everything
38:14that the man had been given as a gift in
38:16order to glorify God will be cursed.
38:19Because when sin entered the world, it
38:21held the door open
38:23for all the pain, all the strife, all
38:25the guilt, all the shame, all the
38:27turmoil that you've ever been through.
38:30And everything was was cursed. At the
38:33macro level, that's why hurricanes come.
38:35Down to the micro level, this is why
38:37cells don't don't obey. And everything
38:41is cursed.
38:42And the first thing that he's going to
38:44curse
38:45is the will to obey. If you go down to
38:47verse 15,
38:49God says, "I will put enmity between you
38:51and the woman, between your offspring
38:52and her offspring, and he shall bruise
38:54your head, and you shall bruise his
38:57heel." This is called a protoevangelium.
39:01That the will to obey
39:03is cursed.
39:05Listen, I've been a Christian for a
39:06long, long time, all right? 30-plus
39:09years, I have been a believer in Jesus
39:11Christ.
39:12And yet, and listen, I'm into the Jesus
39:14thing, man. I promise. I've told you
39:17before, I am a professional Christian.
39:19You guys pay me to do this. You're
39:21good-for-nothing. Y'all pay me to do
39:24what Jesus says.
39:26And yet, I would think I would be
39:28further along in the sanctification
39:29process than I am today.
39:32How in the world am I still struggling
39:33today as a 52-year-old with some of the
39:35things I struggled as a 16-year-old?
39:38Anybody prone to wander, Lord, I I it,
39:40prone to leave the God I love. I
39:41preached my face off about 2 weeks ago
39:43about it. I hope you understand. Why?
39:46Because we're broken down here at the
39:49soul level and we have an enemy that
39:51wants to steal, kill, and destroy.
39:54And I don't even know realize this. You
39:55ever notice Christians don't sin
39:57anymore? They just struggle.
40:00Be in group. People be like, "I'm just
40:02struggling with porn." No, you're not,
40:03dude. Looking at porn is called a sin.
40:06That's called sinning.
40:07If you actually struggled against it and
40:09fought against it, then maybe maybe you
40:11would have some victory over it. Well,
40:13the problem is, like Paul says, "What is
40:15wrong with me?" Something is wrong on
40:17the inside. What's wrong on the inside?
40:20Is that we have been cursed. That our
40:21humanity, our flesh has been cursed. And
40:24even when you ask Jesus to save you, he
40:27redeems your heart and from the moment
40:29you get saved to the moment you get
40:30glorified and go to be with him, it is a
40:32constant battle and struggle between
40:35your flesh and the will of God.
40:38And the will to obey gets
40:39broken.
40:42The second thing that gets broken or
40:43cursed
40:45is that woman to love.
40:47This is crazy, man. I mean,
40:49the brilliance of the word of God.
40:53The Bible's not an old book. The Bible's
40:55a timeless book. The Bible doesn't just
40:56tell you what happens. It tells you what
40:57always happens.
40:59Man, you ever notice the three biggest
41:01struggles in your life? At home, at
41:02work, and in here.
41:04These are the three things that are
41:05going to get cursed. And this
41:06relationship with your wife is going to
41:08get cursed. Listen to what the Bible
41:09says. To the woman he said, "I will
41:11surely multiply pain in childbearing."
41:13Sorry, ladies.
41:15And check this out. Your desire shall be
41:17contrary to your husband, but he shall
41:19rule over you.
41:22Rebecca Maxwell sitting right here on
41:23the front row. She explained this to me
41:24for the first time 20 years ago. We were
41:26in a small group Bible study together.
41:27Our families were.
41:28And she said, "Here's Here's the twist.
41:30Everything God creates, the enemy
41:31corrupts."
41:33Wives, you were created as a helper, a
41:35helpmate. That is not a derogatory term.
41:38Everywhere else in the Old Testament
41:39that word as there is used, it describes
41:41God's role with Israel. This is a big
41:44deal. We need your help. And so because
41:47you were created as a helper, you want
41:48to help. But then what happens is what
41:50you feel like is helping feels like a
41:53hostile takeover to your husband.
41:55Because he the the the the fundamental
41:57question that every man has is this, "Do
41:59I have what it takes?"
42:01And when you correct him all the time
42:03and tell him all the things he's doing
42:04wrong, ultimately what it feels like is,
42:06"No, honey, you don't have what it
42:07takes." Let me explain cuz you're
42:09looking at me like a deer in the
42:10headlights. "What must you mean,
42:12pastor?" Here's what I mean, okay.
42:14Remember the last time your husband was
42:15telling a story?
42:17And every dude knows, you never let the
42:18truth get in the way of good story.
42:19Details are just kind of part of the
42:21window dressing.
42:23And so he's like, "All right, so there I
42:24was.
42:26It was
42:276 months ago, Labor Day weekend, we were
42:29at the beach." You're like, "Actually,
42:30honey, it was a year ago and it was
42:33Memorial Day and we were at the lake."
42:36And right now you're thinking, "What's
42:37wrong with that? He's lucky to have me."
42:40Oh, bless you.
42:43Cuz when you do that, here's what you're
42:44doing.
42:46You know what? You don't have what it
42:47takes to even tell a good story.
42:49And you're not his Holy Spirit.
42:51And if all you ever do is correct and
42:53coerce, you sound more like a dog
42:55trainer
42:56than an encourager.
42:58And encouragement on the lips of a wife
43:01are like gold in the heart of a man.
43:04Listen, I am a in my career, this thing
43:06that I do as a pastor, okay?
43:08I am a relatively successful pastor. I
43:12get flown all over the place to people
43:13show up. I say things and write them
43:15down and all of that. I'm telling you,
43:17that that happens.
43:19And people say very, very nice things to
43:21me and and and it means a lot to me.
43:24But
43:25nothing encourages me like when Gretchen
43:28tells me something nice.
43:30Do you know when I feel like a man?
43:32It's not after preaching all week into a
43:33men's conference to 3,000 men and
43:35signing books and taking pictures and na
43:37na na. It's when she can't get the lid
43:40off the jelly jar and she's like,
43:42"Here, honey." And I go,
43:44"There you go, babe." She's like,
43:45"You're so strong." Like
43:47Hercules. I'm telling you, man.
43:52That thing has been cursed.
43:55And so
43:56later on, here's what he says. Later on
43:58he says
43:59in verse 17, he
44:01to Adam he says, "Because you have
44:02listened to the voice of your wife."
44:03Fellas, did you know you're not supposed
44:04to listen to the voice of your wife?
44:07And you're like, "You damn I'm excellent
44:08at that." No, no, no. No, that's not
44:10what it means.
44:12You got to go deeper there. You're
44:13supposed to listen to her heart.
44:15Remember the last time you listened to
44:16her voice? Remember you were riding in
44:18the truck, she's looking out the window,
44:19you know something's wrong, and you
44:20said, "Hey, baby, what's wrong?" And
44:21what she say? "Nothing."
44:24And you went, "Sweet." All right.
44:27You got to go deeper, man. You got to
44:28listen to her heart.
44:30You got to pursue her heart.
44:32Let me tell you one of the best ways to
44:33pursue her heart
44:35is that when she's talking about
44:37feelings, you answer with feelings. And
44:39when she's talking about facts, then you
44:41can answer with facts. If you mix these
44:43things, you're going to screw things up.
44:45I've learned this the hard way.
44:47If she says something like, "I feel
44:49fat." Feeling.
44:50Don't answer with, "Well, don't eat so
44:52much." Fact. It's not what we're talking
44:53about.
44:58And men, one of our biggest problems of
45:00manhood is this. It's often times we can
45:02treat our wives like that big game
45:04animal that we used to pursue.
45:06We got all dressed up. We learned about
45:08them. We pursued them. We did everything
45:09it took. Then we bagged them, mounted
45:11them, put them on the wall, and then and
45:13then ignore them for the rest of their
45:14life.
45:15Song of Solomon says, "Husbands,
45:17remember the wife of your youth." That
45:18doesn't That doesn't mean remember what
45:20she was like back then. Remember what
45:22was going on in you when you got her to
45:23go out with you.
45:25Boys, I look around the room, you have
45:27out-punted your coverage something
45:28serious, okay?
45:30You remember the things that you used to
45:32do to get her to fall for you? We are to
45:35continue to pursue her that way.
45:37Remember what you used to do?
45:39You would ask her out.
45:41Remember? You would take her on dates.
45:44And listen, man, you 25 and under, you
45:46you got it made with apps and social
45:49media. We used to have to physically
45:51stalk these women
45:53and be like private investigators to see
45:55if they were crazy or not.
45:58And take a risk and ask them out. And
46:00fellas, ask her out.
46:02Of course she's going to say no. Look at
46:04you.
46:06Just keep asking. Keep going.
46:09And what would you do, man? Remember
46:10this, boys, you take a shower.
46:14You'd put on a shirt with a button.
46:16You'd go to a restaurant where you had
46:18to sit down. You didn't get your food
46:19through a window from a clown.
46:22You would pursue her.
46:25You'd go eat frozen yogurt. What grown
46:27man eats frozen yogurt?
46:30A dating one. That's what I'm telling
46:31you.
46:34You see this relationship
46:37has been attacked by sin and the enemy.
46:39And listen, at home,
46:42the Bible calls us men to love our wives
46:44like Christ loved the church.
46:46And I know what some of you are saying.
46:47"Pastor, you don't know my wife. She's
46:49crazy."
46:50I mean, she walks in the room and laser
46:51beams come out of her eyes and puppies
46:53catch on fire and burn up and go to
46:54hell. Listen, I'm not saying you didn't
46:56choose poorly, but here's what I'm
46:57telling you.
46:59In the
47:01in the
47:03relationship between Christ and his
47:05bride, who's the crazy one?
47:07And all he does is pursue relentlessly.
47:12Yeah, we are to love our wives like
47:13Christ loved the church. And listen,
47:15man, when you get sideways at home with
47:16your wife, you got two options. You can
47:17be right or you can be married.
47:21You're like, "Where do you get that?"
47:22The cross.
47:24Jesus could have showed up on this
47:25planet. Says, "I'm right. Y'all are
47:27wrong. That ain't my fault. I didn't
47:28sin.
47:30I'm going to heaven. See you later.
47:31Actually, never see you again. You're
47:32going to hell. You deal with that on
47:33your own." That's not what he does.
47:36But he takes responsibility for things
47:38that are not his fault like our sin. And
47:40he does whatever it takes to reconcile
47:43us to the heavenly Father. And that's
47:45how we're supposed to love our wives.
47:46You want to stand up and act like a man,
47:47you start right there.
47:50So
47:52our will to obey is broken.
47:55Our relationship with the woman to love
47:56is broken.
47:58And then thirdly, work to enjoy is
47:59damaged by sin. He says, "Cursed is the
48:01ground because of you." Ever notice work
48:03is hard?
48:05It's a result of sin. So,
48:09what do we do?
48:11What do we do?
48:12Let me tell you what the next 7 weeks
48:14are not.
48:16It's not a pep rally.
48:19Cuz it just won't work.
48:21The try harder method just won't work.
48:25You see, the reality is again, this is
48:27from John Eldredge, Wild at Heart. He
48:29says that the fundamental question of
48:30every man is this, "Do I have what it
48:31takes?" It drives most of what we do.
48:34The reality of the gospel is you got to
48:36get to that place where you look in the
48:37mirror and you go, "Oh, no.
48:40I don't have what it takes to be a man.
48:43There's no way I can pull this thing off
48:44on my own.
48:46I don't think I can stand up and act
48:47like men and fight and be strong and let
48:49everything I do be done in love. Oh, no.
48:52What I'm going to What am I going to
48:53do?" And the moment you get to the place
48:55where you realize I need somebody to do
48:58for me what I can't do for myself, then
49:00congratulations, men. Then and only then
49:03will you be able to be who God has
49:04called you to be.
49:05You'll never be able to stand up and act
49:07like men until you first bend your knee
49:09to the God man, Jesus Christ. That the
49:12knight never gets to swing his sword
49:13until he first bends his knee to the
49:15king and is anointed and appointed by
49:17him.
49:18This is what we have been called to.
49:22And you see it in the next verses. In
49:23verse 20, it says, "The man called his
49:25wife's name Eve because she was the
49:26mother of all living. And the Lord God
49:29made for Adam and for his wife garments
49:31of skin and clothed them." This is a
49:34foreshadowing of the gospel.
49:36Because of God's love for them, he was
49:39going to take care of their sin, but
49:41because of God's justice that sin must
49:43be dealt with.
49:45And so he's going to kick him out of the
49:46garden and then he's going to do for
49:48them what they can't do for themselves.
49:50And for the very first time the blood of
49:52an animal is shed for the covering of
49:55sin. It is a foreshadowing of what Jesus
49:57Christ is going to do that the blood of
49:59the lamb of God was going to be shed not
50:01to just cover our sin but to take it
50:03away. Here's the point of this entire
50:05series, this entire book.
50:07Is to stand up and act like a man you
50:08must first bow down and surrender to
50:12Jesus.
50:13That is what that is the beginning of
50:16what it means to be a man.
50:18This was the beginning of the teaching
50:20ministry of Jesus. This is how he starts
50:22out the Sermon on the Mount. His
50:25longest, greatest sermon ever recorded.
50:27He starts it out this way. It's called
50:29the Beatitudes. I've taught on this a
50:30hundred times.
50:32He says, "Blessed are the poor in
50:34spirit."
50:36The poor in spirit mean, "Blessed are
50:38you when you realize you don't bring any
50:41merit to the equation."
50:44Blessed are you
50:45blessed am I when I realize I need you
50:49cuz I can't do this on my own.
50:52The way my friend Jeff Cop said it is
50:54the most the three most dangerous words
50:56a man can say is, "I got this."
50:59Cuz fellas, as a man, as a husband, as a
51:01dad,
51:02we ain't got this.
51:04We need to come to Jesus and say,
51:05"Jesus, I ain't got this."
51:07I mean, I can try. Oh my gosh, I can
51:09try.
51:10And actually, fellas, we terrorize our
51:12wives
51:14when we go to some man conference
51:17and we've neglected them for eight
51:18months and then we get all cowboyed up,
51:22you know, hadn't taken them on a date
51:24in four years. Now you go to Olive
51:26Garden and last four days she's like,
51:29"This ain't it, boys."
51:32Cuz your willpower will never be enough.
51:35It's not until we bend our knee to Jesus
51:37and say,
51:38"I'm broken and I need your help."
51:41And then what's crazy
51:42and like crazy incredible
51:45is Peter says this.
51:48When you do bend your knee to Jesus,
51:49when you do surrender to Christ, when
51:51you do say,
51:52"I'm broken in spirit. I got nothing."
51:56And Jesus says, "Blessed are the meek.
51:57Blessed are you, fellas.
51:59Not when you're weak,
52:01but when you are strong but you turn the
52:03reins of your life over to a different
52:05leader and you say, "Here. Use me, lead
52:07me, guide me." When you surrender your
52:09life to Jesus, he puts on the inside of
52:11every one of us the very spirit of God,
52:14the same spirit that brought him up out
52:15of the grave.
52:17And if the tomb is empty, anything is
52:18possible, which means if you have the
52:20spirit of God in you, Peter says, "His
52:23divine power has given us everything we
52:26need for life and godliness." In other
52:27words, his divine power has given us
52:29everything we need to accomplish
52:31everything that he has called us to
52:34accomplish. And it was his idea to call
52:36you to be a man, not yours.
52:38But this will only happen when you bend
52:40your knee to Jesus. So, on your way in
52:42you got this card right here. I want you
52:44to get it out.
52:46I want you to look at it.
52:49Be a man.
52:53We need pictures sometimes. See these
52:54pictures?
52:55Bottom shelf, boys. Look at that
52:57picture.
52:59This is what it means to be a godly man.
53:00Right there in the middle. That's It
53:01says, "Act like men. Be a godly man."
53:03And around it it tells us how. This is
53:05what we're going to spend the next six
53:07weeks on.
53:09About what it looks like to be watchful,
53:11to stand firm, to be strong, to do
53:12everything in love. We're going to do a
53:14week on how to be a husband, what the
53:15Bible says about being a dad. Okay?
53:18If you flip it over on the other side,
53:19there's a pledge right here.
53:22And I'm asking you if you are ready to
53:24bend your knee to Jesus and say, "God, I
53:26need your help to do this thing."
53:29And listen, if you're not going to take
53:30this thing seriously, then give it back.
53:33I ain't got time to play church. You
53:34understand?
53:36But if you say,
53:38"I want what God has for me, but I need
53:40his help." Then I want you to sign this
53:43thing. You're not going to turn it in. I
53:44know what it says. I wrote it.
53:47I want you to take your phone and snap
53:50that little QR code. If you don't know
53:52how to do it, ask your kids or ask your
53:53wife and she'll show you how to do it.
53:55Don't take a picture of it. A little
53:56yellow thing's going to pop up. Hit the
53:58yellow thing.
53:59It's going to take you to a website,
54:00give you some information that so that
54:02over the next seven weeks we're going to
54:04send you encouragement
54:06and accountability to help you. Anybody
54:09need encouragement and accountability,
54:10fellas? Me, too.
54:13I'm signing up for this, too.
54:14And listen, our 20-year-olds put it
54:16together cuz good lord, I can't see
54:17this. God bless your eyes and your
54:18flexibility.
54:20So you have to take a picture of it,
54:22expand it, put it somewhere you can see
54:23it.
54:27And you're saying by the power of
54:29Christ, with my knee bended to him,
54:32I want to be able to stand up and do
54:34what God has called me to be. Cuz here's
54:35the thing, man, when men lead in love
54:37well, everybody flourishes.
54:41And so if you're ready,
54:43not because of a pep talk, but because
54:45of God's calling in your life as a man,
54:47as a granddad, as a single man, as a
54:50married man, whatever it is. If you are
54:52ready to stand firm, to stand up and act
54:53like men,
54:55and you are going to be committed over
54:57these next weeks
54:59pledging yourself that you're going to
55:01build new habits in your life that you
55:03hope change you and and check this out
55:05and change generations of your family to
55:09come,
55:10then I want you to stand up right now
55:11and say, "All right, I'm in. I'm in."
55:14Praise God. I want you to stand up. Now
55:15listen, if you're not, don't. Okay?
55:18There we go.
55:19You watching in prison? I want you to
55:21stand up. You watching online? I want
55:23you to stand up.
55:27If you were here with your brother,
55:29your son,
55:31and especially your husband,
55:33ladies, I would love you to just reach
55:35out and put your hand on him.
55:36And I'm telling you that encouraging
55:38touch, I'm telling you, it's going to
55:40mean a hundred times more than any word
55:42that I have just spoken.
55:44And fellas, I'm going to pray for you.
55:46And when we get done here, I just on
55:48your way out, if you've signed this
55:49card, you're going to keep this, you're
55:50going to put it somewhere as a constant
55:52reminder. And we're going to give you
55:53one of these little bracelet rubber band
55:55things that just say "Stand firm." A
55:57part of the reason we do this, man, is
55:58we have about 35,000 people that show up
56:01every weekend in the buildings all over
56:03Jacksonville from Orlando to Jessup and
56:05everywhere in between. And it is an
56:07encouraging thing when you see some
56:08other brothers in the gym and at the
56:10coffee shop and all over the place.
56:12We can hold each other accountable.
56:15Let me pray for us. Our good and
56:16gracious heavenly Father God, I thank
56:18you that you have not called us to
56:19cowboy up, to buck up, to man up. That's
56:22not what you called us to.
56:23You've called us to bend our knee to the
56:25God-man, Jesus Christ.
56:27God, we acknowledge that we have an
56:29enemy who is a liar, he's a thief, and
56:31he's only come to steal, kill, and
56:33destroy. And if he can take out these
56:35men, then by definition it's going to
56:37leave the ones that we love the most
56:39defenseless
56:41for him to ravage.
56:43So God, we say not on our watch. And
56:45Lord, oh, would you do our work do your
56:47work first and foremost in us.
56:51God, may we be the husbands that you've
56:52called us to be. God, may we be the
56:54workers that you've called us to be.
56:57God, may we be the followers that you've
56:59called us to be.
57:00But Lord, that first starts by us
57:02bending our knee to you. God, we ask for
57:05the miraculous.
57:07God, we thank you for your justice,
57:10but we thank you more for your grace.
57:12That you have done for us what we could
57:14not do for ourselves. And Lord, we
57:18just want to ask you to cash the checks
57:20that you have promised.
57:22That your divine power has given us
57:24everything that we need to be who have
57:26you have called us to be. Lord, I pray
57:29that for generations this part of the
57:31world would be different because these
57:33men will stand firm and act like men.
57:36We pray this in Jesus' name.
57:38Amen.
57:39Now ladies, if you would please stand
57:41and join us. Praise God. We are going to
57:43respond to the gospel.
57:45We're going to sing and men,
57:49godly men sing.
57:51Paul told Timothy, "You tell the godly
57:53men to lift their hands high, holy hands
57:57in the sanctuary." We're going to bring
57:59our first and best because godly men are
58:01generous men who establish that God is
58:03first in their life. So we bring our
58:05first and best.
58:07And we going to pray.
58:08And I almost always ask the men to pray
58:10over their wives. This time, wives,
58:12daughters, sisters, this would be an
58:14incredible opportunity
58:16for you
58:18and your husband or your dad or your
58:19brother to come down here and you pray a
58:21blessing over this man because he needs
58:24it. Let's sing. Let's bring. Let's pray.
58:26Let's respond.

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