YouTube transcript (vhOV_Od0A3M) — Transcript
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- 0:00I've put together the most valuable
- 0:01lessons that have helped me achieve more
- 0:02out of my life. Hopefully, they're
- 0:04useful for you, too. Enjoy. This is
- 0:06brutally honest advice for poor people.
- 0:08I've been there. I had to pay rent.
- 0:10Every night, I would think if I didn't
- 0:11wake up tomorrow, I would be okay with
- 0:12it. And I don't want that for anybody.
- 0:14[music] I get it.
- 0:20I was just going through all these old
- 0:21files yesterday and I saw a goal that I
- 0:23had written, which was to make $10,000 a
- 0:26month income. And so it was 13 years
- 0:29ago. And so like I viscerally remember
- 0:33what that was like. Um and I know I
- 0:36never I was in so much pain during that
- 0:39during that time that I get it. And so
- 0:42like the reason we make this stuff is
- 0:44cuz I I've been there and I don't want
- 0:46that for anybody, you know? Like I
- 0:48missed I missed my 20s. Like I just I
- 0:52didn't have them as people traditionally
- 0:54say it, you know? Like it's it's weird
- 0:57because in today's like internet culture
- 0:58like I started my I I started my first
- 1:01brickandmortar business like storefront.
- 1:04I was 23. Like I didn't know [ __ ] about
- 1:06[ __ ] Like I knew nothing. And like I
- 1:09didn't know you could hire employees.
- 1:11Like it wasn't a thought. Like I didn't
- 1:13know anything. Um, and so like I
- 1:18cleaned, I did the billing, I did the
- 1:21sales, I taught the sessions, like I
- 1:23fixed the equipment, like I did
- 1:25everything because I didn't know you
- 1:26could and I also I did I didn't know and
- 1:28I didn't have the money, frankly, to
- 1:30afford anything else. And so, um, I get
- 1:35it. Like I get I get I get it. Um,
- 1:41but to get out of that, you have to take
- 1:44steps. And the first step is saying that
- 1:46it's my fault. The second step is that
- 1:49you have to use what you have.
- 1:52And so in the beginning I would I would
- 1:55you know I I was reading the self-help
- 1:56books and all this stuff. And um none of
- 2:00them really hit for me because a lot of
- 2:02it was like power of positive thinking
- 2:04and like affirmations and like all this
- 2:07stuff. And the reason I make the content
- 2:08I do now, which has now almost become
- 2:09like a shtick, um, countering that is be
- 2:13is because it didn't work for me. And
- 2:15I'm trying like I'm not trying to speak
- 2:16to everybody. If you if that works for
- 2:18you, then like awesome. Like awesome.
- 2:22Like I people mistake me saying this is
- 2:24what worked for me with this is what I
- 2:26think everyone should do. And it it
- 2:28couldn't be further from the truth. I'm
- 2:29saying if what h what you have been
- 2:30doing hasn't been working, then consider
- 2:33this. which is that like I remember
- 2:35because I just read this yesterday. The
- 2:37intro in the book I say um I wish I
- 2:41could tell you that the reason I was
- 2:43able to make it out of the gym
- 2:46was because I was like really passionate
- 2:48about changing people's lives and I
- 2:49loved fitness and I loved you know my
- 2:51clients faces when they would light up
- 2:52and they'd step on the scale and they'd
- 2:54lose weight. They'd be able to fit in
- 2:55their high school clothes again. It was
- 2:57none of that. It was just the sheer
- 2:59anger that I had, but the idea of being
- 3:01wrong and having the people back home
- 3:05be right about everything. And I just
- 3:08couldn't I couldn't I mean I still can
- 3:10barely tolerate it. And so I mean I took
- 3:14in some ways and this isn't a I don't if
- 3:17woe is me is the right is the right term
- 3:19but like I had an otherwise very
- 3:21successful career. like I was in a white
- 3:24collar job and sometimes it's hard like
- 3:27I mean hey I don't know I haven't been
- 3:29the other situation but taking a step
- 3:31down and humbling yourself to minimum
- 3:33wage after you've been in a white collar
- 3:35situation not easy and I remember I had
- 3:38clients who walk in and be like oh did
- 3:39you did you uh did you go to college and
- 3:41they were saying that um patronizingly
- 3:45um and mind you everyone here at least
- 3:48this channel knows that I don't I don't
- 3:49give a [ __ ] um but they were saying it
- 3:52to basically like when I was going to
- 3:53like write something down, like am I
- 3:55literate?
- 3:57And in those moments again, it was like
- 4:00I could be right or be rich. Like I
- 4:01could try and humiliate them back
- 4:02because the pain of what they just said
- 4:04made me feel. They probably didn't even
- 4:05intend that.
- 4:07Or I can be like, "Yeah, yeah, I went to
- 4:10I went to school. I'm very grateful for
- 4:11it." You know, like so what are your
- 4:12goals? I could just move right past it.
- 4:14And so you develop that skin because I
- 4:16had to cuz I had to [ __ ] pay rent.
- 4:18And so I mean I tell stories about
- 4:21having a kid drawing marker on the wall
- 4:23while I'm trying to close his mom and
- 4:25he's writing in permanent marker and I'm
- 4:27trying not to lose my [ __ ] over the fact
- 4:28that I'm have to repaint the wall
- 4:30because she doesn't know how to parent a
- 4:31child. But I needed to close the card to
- 4:33pay for the paint. And so it's like I
- 4:36can scold the kid and lose the sale or I
- 4:38can close the sale and keep my cool and
- 4:40then eventually clean the clean the
- 4:41wall. And so like you only get that
- 4:44stuff by doing it. Um, and so if you're
- 4:47in if you're in a place right now where
- 4:50you don't have a lot, you only have one
- 4:53thing, which is time. And so you have
- 4:56lower leverage. So I'm not going to lie
- 4:57to you and say that you like you're
- 4:59there there's this one play, this one
- 5:01secret. No, it's just it's sheer brute
- 5:03force. Like you have to will yourself
- 5:05out of it. Like there's you have to do
- 5:08it's it's like a it's a it's a huge
- 5:10amount of of soul driving energy that
- 5:14you have to do outside of what you
- 5:16normally do. So it's like you have to
- 5:18live one person's normal life. You have
- 5:20to do your normal work, your normal job.
- 5:21You have to eat, you have to sleep, you
- 5:22have to clean, you have to do whatever
- 5:23else and then then the workday starts.
- 5:28So that is how you eat today, but you're
- 5:30trying to get ahead and you have to eat
- 5:31tomorrow. And so you have to you have to
- 5:33you have to eat the glass so that you
- 5:36can take the pain today and you're
- 5:37trying to take as much of the pain from
- 5:39tomorrow as you can today so you can get
- 5:42ahead and like the even the concept of
- 5:45getting ahead. I like I think about this
- 5:47visually which is like if you have this
- 5:48this timeline of life that you can pull
- 5:51towards you and it's glass in the
- 5:54beginning and then it's slightly less
- 5:56less coarse and then less coarse and
- 5:57then it gets and then it gets neutral
- 5:59and then it starts to get a little bit
- 6:00sweeter and a little bit sweeter and a
- 6:01little bit sweeter but you have to get
- 6:02through that glass period where you pull
- 6:04it towards you and I do have this theory
- 6:06that like on a long enough time horizon
- 6:08and if we could live a thousand years
- 6:10everyone would eventually be successful
- 6:12but people wait too long and they die
- 6:14too early and I say die too really on a
- 6:16long on a long timeline. And so I want I
- 6:20have to live today and tomorrow and the
- 6:22next day so I can live three days at a
- 6:24time so I can get to my second and third
- 6:26life's benefits now. And so that was why
- 6:30like I remember the only times that I
- 6:32took off when I was when I was at the
- 6:34gym and one of the biggest things that I
- 6:36was grateful for with the gyms is that I
- 6:38moved across the country and so I knew
- 6:40no one. I was in Huntington Beach. I was
- 6:41from Baltimore like no one. And what
- 6:44would happen, so one of the gifts of
- 6:45that was that once the week was over, so
- 6:47my Saturday sessions were done at like
- 6:49noon, my phone didn't ring. No, like in
- 6:53some ways very sad because like no one
- 6:56wanted to see Alex, you know what I
- 6:57mean? Like no one was inviting me out.
- 6:59But I was like, well [ __ ] like I got to
- 7:01make this work. And so I would just I'd
- 7:05sit there and I'd be like, how do I sell
- 7:06memberships? How do I market? How do I
- 7:08everything, you know? But I but that was
- 7:10how I got ahead. And so I I tell the
- 7:14stories of like I remember when I when I
- 7:16stopped watching the Ravens and I was
- 7:18from Baltimore, so that was like like a
- 7:21tie to home.
- 7:27And so um yeah, it's fresh for me cuz I
- 7:29just read the story yesterday, but
- 7:31[sighs] it was like it was tough.
- 7:42I'll catch my breath. So, [sighs]
- 7:44all that to say,
- 7:46the sacrifices that I encourage people
- 7:48to take are not sacrifices I did not
- 7:50make.
- 7:51And I I don't say that there there's
- 7:55there's no ways to to get there. I'm
- 7:58just saying that this is the way I got
- 7:59there.
- 8:01And if this path works for you, then
- 8:04maybe it works better than what you're
- 8:05doing right now, which is I had a lot of
- 8:08pain.
- 8:09And so I I tried to use it. I just used
- 8:13what I had. I just, you know, I was just
- 8:15angry. I didn't I didn't want to fail.
- 8:17And so I just kept going. And so there
- 8:21was no like there just wasn't another
- 8:24option. And so I think that's like
- 8:28that's what I would encourage people to
- 8:29think about was like they're just there
- 8:32I just didn't I didn't allow another
- 8:35option because the other option was just
- 8:37was just worse than dying because
- 8:42I mean I've told this story before and
- 8:43things get hyperbolized mean you know
- 8:45exaggerated romanticized whatever but
- 8:47like when I had my big consulting job I
- 8:50was making good money and I had the
- 8:53approval of my my peers and all this
- 8:55stuff and I just didn't want to wake up
- 8:58the next day every day and it wasn't
- 8:59like I was trying to kill myself. It
- 9:00wasn't that. But I was I every night I
- 9:02would think if I didn't wake up tomorrow
- 9:03I would be okay with it. And so
- 9:07when I knew that that was what I was
- 9:10going back to if I didn't make this
- 9:12work. I just had I had no plan B. I mean
- 9:16I had plan B is that I would drive Uber
- 9:18and strip. I joke about that. But that
- 9:20was very much my plan B if I didn't make
- 9:21it work. Um, but
- 9:26and I I I get I get grilled on social
- 9:28media for saying this because of like
- 9:30[ __ ] race wars, but like there have
- 9:34been slaves for thousands of years.
- 9:37There were slaves in Egyptian times.
- 9:38There were Jews who were slaves. There
- 9:40were Persian slaves. There were white
- 9:41slaves. There are backslaves. Humans
- 9:43have enslaved one another. Period. And I
- 9:46like to think of things in extremes
- 9:48because it allows me to think about
- 9:49what's possible. And so the idea that
- 9:52someone else at some other time in
- 9:54history has worked seven days a week,
- 9:57every hour that they're awake with a
- 9:59threat not of their own death, but of
- 10:00their children's death, because that's
- 10:02what I would do if I were trying to
- 10:03control somebody. I would take their
- 10:04kids and say, "I'll kill them if you
- 10:06don't work." And guess what? They'll
- 10:07probably work. That that capacity
- 10:11exists. And so I would think to myself
- 10:14like
- 10:16I would try and I would try and put
- 10:17myself in that frame so that I wouldn't
- 10:20get into the woe is me cycle and think
- 10:24all these things I could blame for why
- 10:26I'm here right now. Why isn't this
- 10:27working as fast? Like how is it that
- 10:30these guys are making more money than
- 10:31me? Like why don't these people will
- 10:33give me the respect I deserve? Blah blah
- 10:35blah blah blah. Um and just say like
- 10:38what can I do now?
- 10:41And then just every hour of every day,
- 10:44well, what can I do now? And so it was I
- 10:47have to learn how to market. I have to
- 10:49learn how to sell. I have to I have to
- 10:51go to these these groups that where
- 10:53other gym owners are and I got to learn
- 10:55their stuff. I got to I got to go to
- 10:57these seminars. I got to save up so I
- 10:58can learn some stuff. And that's what I
- 11:02did. And so that's how I got out of it.
- 11:04That visual of life as this like bloody
- 11:07game of tugof-war where like most people
- 11:09their hands just get too
- 11:11>> cut to keep holding on to the rope is
- 11:13like it's in it's stuck in my head.
- 11:15>> Yeah.
- 11:16>> It's that's really powerful.
- 11:17>> Yeah. It was tough.
- 11:20>> So I'm I'm
- 11:23the first 100 grand is the hardest. And
- 11:26I know that that sounds like an
- 11:27unfathomable amount of money. It took me
- 11:29five years. Like I get it. So, like
- 11:34you just have to save it $1 at a time.
- 11:36Like that's like that's what it is. Now,
- 11:38obviously I talk about other things.
- 11:39Like
- 11:41there are smarter ways to make money for
- 11:43sure. Like if you can sell expensive
- 11:45stuff, you can just move the decimals.
- 11:46Like I mean like the thing is is
- 11:50it is factually true. It is spiritually
- 11:52false. And I don't even believe in
- 11:54spirituality in general, but like it is
- 11:57it is tough to sell a $10 million
- 12:01building and make a million dollar
- 12:03commission or a $500,000 commission when
- 12:06you are broke as [ __ ] It is very like
- 12:09it is like you would have to become a
- 12:11different person, which is why most
- 12:12people's first sale is not that. But is
- 12:14it technically possible? Yes. A lot of
- 12:17people watch YouTube and the internet
- 12:20for complex money-making skills and they
- 12:23haven't even mastered showing up on
- 12:25time. And so it's like they want to go
- 12:28straight to calculus, but they don't
- 12:29know how to do simple addition. But the
- 12:31thing is is that like simple addition is
- 12:33foundational to that. And none of the
- 12:35other stuff will matter unless you can
- 12:37do the basics. But the basics doesn't
- 12:39make them less important. Usually
- 12:41they're the foundation of a building
- 12:42which make them arguably more important.
- 12:44They just are simpler to understand but
- 12:47not simpler to do. And I think that's
- 12:49the big disconnect a lot of people have
- 12:50is that they think they because they
- 12:52understand something conceptually that
- 12:53they feel like they have already
- 12:54mastered the skill which are two very
- 12:56different things.
- 12:58And so one of the most common traits
- 13:00that people who are poor have is that
- 13:03it's always tomorrow. And so they never
- 13:05talk about anything in terms of today.
- 13:07And so it's about starting tomorrow, the
- 13:09diet tomorrow, the diet on Monday, next
- 13:11year, my New Year's resolution. It's
- 13:12always it's always pushing off. So
- 13:14rather than uh delaying gratification,
- 13:18they delay pain. And so rather than
- 13:20trying taking pain now for pleasure
- 13:23later, they take pleasure now and pain
- 13:26later. And so they flip the equation.
- 13:28And so they're surprised when today is
- 13:31later from yesterday that they're in
- 13:34pain. Because if if last week you were
- 13:38like, I'm starting my diet this week,
- 13:41then it is now this week and you've
- 13:43delayed the pain to today. And that
- 13:46means that the body you have right now
- 13:47is the result of the delayed pain that
- 13:50you are now forcing yourself to endure.
- 13:52And so
- 13:54they're somehow surprised when the bill
- 13:56comes due that they pushed off from the
- 13:59past. And so the first lesson of getting
- 14:02out of poverty is two words. It's my
- 14:05fault. It's I have to own that. And I
- 14:08think my fault you can kind of
- 14:09extrapolate to right now. Not like you
- 14:12basically have to own everything that
- 14:14passed to this moment. So, all the pain
- 14:16that I've gone through, all of the
- 14:17Mondays that I've missed, all of the
- 14:19diets that I've skipped, all of the
- 14:20savings I haven't made, all of those are
- 14:24not my dad's fault, my mom's fault, my
- 14:26circumstances fault, the country I was
- 14:27born in's fault, the zip code, any of
- 14:29those things fault. It's just mine. And
- 14:31the thing is is that people have this
- 14:33belief that because they have a strong
- 14:34argument for why it's something or
- 14:36someone else's fault that that somehow
- 14:38helps them.
- 14:40And it just doesn't because whatever you
- 14:43cast blame to is where you also cast
- 14:46power to. And so if I say I can't
- 14:50succeed because my mom didn't love me,
- 14:52guess who controls me? My mom. And so if
- 14:56you also like replace my mom with a
- 15:00race, a gender, a political party,
- 15:04whatever the thing like I can't succeed
- 15:05because of Trump's laws. I can't succeed
- 15:08because of the radical left, because of
- 15:10wokeism, because of whatever. You
- 15:12actually give that thing more power in
- 15:14your life than you give yourself. And so
- 15:17it's completely it the thing is is that
- 15:19and this is what's so deceiving about it
- 15:21is it's very it's very um
- 15:23self-fulfilling is that you get more
- 15:25evidence and you get more confirmation.
- 15:27You get more evidence, you get more
- 15:28confirmation, and the more your life
- 15:29sucks, the more you're confirmed that
- 15:30you were right. But like, do you want to
- 15:34be right about the fact that your life
- 15:36sucks
- 15:38or would you rather like there's a
- 15:40there's I think it's an old Zig Ziggler
- 15:41saying he said you can either be right
- 15:42or you can be rich. And I mean it's
- 15:45simple, but this is what he was getting
- 15:46at is that you can say, you know what,
- 15:49you are right. Your dad kicked the [ __ ]
- 15:50out of your whole life and you don't
- 15:51have any confidence because he told you
- 15:52a piece of [ __ ] every day. You're right.
- 15:56But in order to be rich, you need to let
- 15:58that go. Because every day you say that
- 16:00I'm not successful because of this, it
- 16:03means because this now owns you. And for
- 16:07me personally, that realization that the
- 16:10thing that I hated most in the world,
- 16:12the things that I blamed for why my life
- 16:14wasn't the way it was, I was their
- 16:17[ __ ] And just realizing that um made
- 16:21me angry. But through that anger, I was
- 16:24able to say, "Well, [ __ ] them." like I
- 16:27will succeed despite the fact that my
- 16:29dad said this or my mom said this or
- 16:31Barack Obama said this or Trump said
- 16:32this or the woke left says what? Despite
- 16:36that, despite the fact that the chips
- 16:37are stacked against me, I will still
- 16:40win. Why does saying my fault and taking
- 16:43that accountability begin to set someone
- 16:44down the path of making more money?
- 16:47>> And so if you think about if we think
- 16:49about success in terms of layers like
- 16:50foundations, right? the the the base
- 16:55level like when you're digging the
- 16:56building where you put the hole and you
- 16:58pour the concrete and the base of the
- 16:59entire thing is who is in power? Who is
- 17:04source? Because if it's anything but you
- 17:07in that base layer, all of the other
- 17:09things on top of them will topple down.
- 17:12It's it's a foundation of sand.
- 17:14Otherwise, you can't build on top of
- 17:16blaming other people. There's nothing
- 17:18that stands on it. You see like I want
- 17:20to learn sales but I can't learn sales
- 17:23because I didn't get hugged enough as a
- 17:26kid and so I don't like people. And so
- 17:28as long as you keep holding on to that
- 17:29you have sand as your foundation. But if
- 17:32you want to learn how to sell or you
- 17:33want to learn how to market or you want
- 17:34to learn how to do whatever until you
- 17:37say well it's my fault that I don't know
- 17:39it
- 17:40and because of that it's within my power
- 17:43to change it.
- 17:44>> So it's not sales books. It's not it's
- 17:47not reading offers. It's not it's not
- 17:48even your books
- 17:49>> at the at the very beginning you have to
- 17:51accept that which is the first two words
- 17:52my fault my responsibility all me I am
- 17:57source
- 17:58and then once you can accept that one
- 18:00thing and what's crazy is that that one
- 18:02foundation is where 90% of people
- 18:04literally aren't they're not there they
- 18:07can't do it the reason my girlfriend
- 18:10left me is because of this not me the
- 18:12reason I lost my job is because my my
- 18:13employer was a dick my boss sucked
- 18:15whatever the economy Like but like it
- 18:19never serves you. Like give me one
- 18:22instance, one example. This is to anyone
- 18:25who's listening to this. One example of
- 18:27when you blame something else and it
- 18:30made you better.
- 18:32One. You can't find it because it's
- 18:34fundamentally not true. And so you
- 18:37cannot both desire to get better and
- 18:40also maintain blame. You have to pick.
- 18:43>> When did this really hit home for you?
- 18:45Was it when you lost money?
- 18:47>> No, when I was 19 years old, I had to
- 18:49write an essay about uh depression in an
- 18:52intro to sight class. And I used to I
- 18:55don't talk about my mother my mother
- 18:56very much, but I used to harp a lot. I
- 18:58was an equal I was an equal opportunity
- 19:00angry person. I was angry at everybody.
- 19:03In other words, I blamed everyone. And
- 19:05so I blamed her for X, Y, and Z. And I
- 19:09remember having to write this
- 19:13essay on depression and you had to do it
- 19:16from someone else's perspective. And so
- 19:17you had to say how would they how would
- 19:20the environment and their upbringing
- 19:21things like that contribute to
- 19:25the outcomes in their life. And so by
- 19:27writing the essay, true or not, to be
- 19:30clear, about my mother's upbringing and
- 19:33how hard she had as an immigrant coming
- 19:35here, getting beat up as a kid, getting
- 19:36made up for not being able to speak the
- 19:37language, all that kind of stuff. And
- 19:39this was in the [ __ ] 50s. It's when
- 19:41like it was more accepted to beat up
- 19:43foreigners rather than let them in.
- 19:45Anyways, um
- 19:48so she had a tough time and so it made
- 19:51sense and and when I framed it like
- 19:53that, I was like, you know, maybe she's
- 19:54actually a massive success given where
- 19:57she started. And so then I thought to
- 20:00myself, now mind you, I still wasn't
- 20:03over it. But it was in this process that
- 20:06the first thing that happened is when I
- 20:07went back home for fall break or winter
- 20:09break, I remember she said something to
- 20:11me which would normally just like be the
- 20:12beginning of some big fight. you know,
- 20:14you get into these routines. Like, I'll
- 20:15say this thing that we both hate and
- 20:16then we'll just get in a nice fight
- 20:17about it. And she said the trigger and I
- 20:19was just like,
- 20:21I understand you. I'm sorry you went
- 20:24through the stuff you went through. And
- 20:26she just like looked completely shocked
- 20:28and then just like started balling. And
- 20:31so I was like, we're cool. Like you
- 20:35don't anger me anymore. And I think for
- 20:37the most part since then, like that's
- 20:38been more or less the dynamic that
- 20:40shifted.
- 20:42But leading into that was also the idea
- 20:44that all the relationships that I had
- 20:48had that id blamed for not working
- 20:50because of the dynamic that I had with
- 20:51my mother. I was like I am giving her
- 20:56this power over my love life.
- 21:00That's gross. And so I was like well I
- 21:03I'd rather just say it's on me to change
- 21:05and not have my mom or parents at all
- 21:08involved in my relationships. And so
- 21:11that was me taking it's her fault that I
- 21:14can't make these things work. I have
- 21:16commitment issues. I don't want to get
- 21:17close to people. I've been hurt before.
- 21:19Blah blah blah. To like, okay, well,
- 21:22let's take it to the next extreme.
- 21:23Great. You're right. You'll never be
- 21:26close to anyone. You'll never have a
- 21:28relationship that'll last. You're right.
- 21:31Now what?
- 21:33I remember I was at a conference and I
- 21:36had this lady stand up in the crowd and
- 21:40I had just done a thing on like I don't
- 21:42remember what it was called offers and
- 21:44she stood up [sighs] and said let me
- 21:46give you six reasons why this isn't
- 21:47going to work for my business and so she
- 21:50went down her list and I was like uh-huh
- 21:52uh-huh uh-huh. So I got to the end of
- 21:53the whole thing and um she said and
- 21:56that's why this isn't going to work for
- 21:58my business and I was like you're right
- 21:59you'll never be able to make this work
- 22:01for your business. And she looked at me
- 22:04like angry and she lashed back. She was
- 22:07like, "Yes, I yes I will. I'll be able
- 22:09to make this work for my business for
- 22:10this reason, this reason." And so the
- 22:12thing is is that like if the victim
- 22:14frame is just taken to the natural
- 22:16extreme, you realize that you're right,
- 22:18you win the game. And by being right the
- 22:20entire time, you lose everything. And so
- 22:23it's one of these frames that I love.
- 22:24Dr. Cashy says this. He says, "You're
- 22:2699% right, but 100% wrong." And what
- 22:30that means is like
- 22:32for example, if I every time I bring a
- 22:34girl home and I want my parents
- 22:36approval, I bring her home and they say,
- 22:38"This isn't the one. This isn't the one.
- 22:40She's not good enough." Whatever it is,
- 22:41every time it's easy for them to say
- 22:43that because every single person you
- 22:45date, except for the one you marry, they
- 22:47are right on. And so they're 99% of the
- 22:50time they're right. And they're
- 22:51confirmed by saying that that person
- 22:53that you bring home is not good enough.
- 22:54Because every time eventually you break
- 22:56up, oh, it's not going to last. This
- 22:58isn't the one. and it keeps going,
- 22:59right? But if you keep doing that all
- 23:01the way to the natural extreme, you're
- 23:03100% wrong because you will be wrong
- 23:05eventually. It's the same thing as like,
- 23:07I want to start this business, it's not
- 23:09going to work. It's not going to work.
- 23:10The second one will work. The fifth one
- 23:11won't work. The seventh one work won't
- 23:13work. And they're right, but they're
- 23:15just wrong on the long enough time
- 23:17horizon because one of them will [ __ ]
- 23:19work. And one of the girls or one of the
- 23:21guys that you bring home will be the one
- 23:23that you are going to be with. But it's
- 23:25so much safer for them to be right and
- 23:27right and right and you and they get
- 23:31deceived by their short-term rightness
- 23:33that they miss the long-term wrong. And
- 23:35we do this to oursel too when you're in
- 23:37the victim frame. I don't even like
- 23:39using the victim frame, but when you're
- 23:40in the powerless frame, you give the
- 23:42power away and you get to be right over
- 23:44that's why it didn't work. This didn't
- 23:46work. This relationship won't work. This
- 23:47job won't work. You keep it's not going
- 23:48to work this time either. Because you
- 23:49get to be right over and over again. and
- 23:50it makes you feel good in the short
- 23:51term, but in the long term, you
- 23:53guarantee the loss.
- 23:55>> I think there's also like social
- 23:56reinforcement. Like we love to complain
- 23:58about the weather and
- 23:59>> it's literally the same thing as never
- 24:01investing. Like if you want to invest
- 24:03your money, right, and you like you have
- 24:05all this big pile of savings. If you
- 24:08ever invest, there's always the
- 24:09possibility that it goes down in the
- 24:10short term. It's just the nature of
- 24:12markets in general. But if you never
- 24:14invest, you guarantee that you will
- 24:16never get rich over the long haul. And
- 24:18so every day you could make this risk.
- 24:21You take a small risk, but you guarantee
- 24:23a macro win. So you take a small risk
- 24:26today, potential for loss today for the
- 24:28guarantee over the long haul that it
- 24:29grows and it makes you money. But the
- 24:32flip side is you don't take the small
- 24:34risk of loss today. You take the comfort
- 24:36today for the guarantee that you get the
- 24:38long loss. And so so many people flip
- 24:40their life to that same thing is that
- 24:42they have they flip the pleasure for
- 24:45today and they and they they just forget
- 24:47the second half of this which is pain
- 24:49for tomorrow and that today is also
- 24:52yesterday's tomorrow and we're living
- 24:54through the pain that you cast like you
- 24:56own this and until you're like this is
- 24:58my fault that I'm in pain today because
- 25:00of decisions that I put off pain for
- 25:02tomorrow where today is tomorrow. When
- 25:04you're broke, every dollar means so much
- 25:07to you.
- 25:09But
- 25:11and you want to see the dollars in your
- 25:13bank account go up. But I never made
- 25:16that my goal. I made the amount of money
- 25:19I made every month my goal because I saw
- 25:22that as my like potential energy versus
- 25:24stored energy. Not to get I mean
- 25:27whatever physics people, you get what
- 25:28I'm saying. And so I was willing to take
- 25:31that stored energy and reinvest it to
- 25:34take $5,000 a month in income to make it
- 25:36$6,000 a month because I knew that over
- 25:38a year I was going to make 12. And so if
- 25:40it cost me two to make the 12 in income,
- 25:42I would make that trade every time. And
- 25:44so whenever I'd save up a small like
- 25:46nut, now obviously I've always been
- 25:49pretty good at about spending money.
- 25:50Like I I' I haven't had that that habit.
- 25:53So like again foundations like first
- 25:55it's your fault. Second spend less than
- 25:57you make. Third, take all of the excess
- 26:00and spend it on making more because if
- 26:02you're making minimum wage, I'm gonna
- 26:06say what you probably already know.
- 26:08You're not going to get ahead. Like,
- 26:10you're not going to save your way there.
- 26:12You're not like, everyone loves to tell
- 26:13the story of that one girl at
- 26:14McDonald's, but you know, they don't
- 26:15tell the other 100 million people who
- 26:17worked at McDonald's over over the world
- 26:19who didn't make it. And like the outcome
- 26:21they're talking about is like she made
- 26:22$8 million over 40 years working
- 26:24McDonald's. like you can shoot for more.
- 26:28And so like take the money you make,
- 26:31live on nothing, and the hard part is to
- 26:33swallowing the pride for the fact that
- 26:34in the short term, everyone's going to
- 26:36be right when they say that you're
- 26:37amounting to nothing. And that's the
- 26:39tough part. That's the glass that you
- 26:41have to you have to swallow that. You
- 26:42have to pull towards you. And there's
- 26:46just no other way. Like you have to
- 26:48learn the skills. Now, I mean, to be
- 26:50fair, YouTube didn't exist [laughter]
- 26:53when I was doing this. And like
- 26:55Instagram was like a new platform. So
- 26:57like all this stuff like the stuff we
- 26:59have today is crazy. Like the fact that
- 27:00these videos and this podcast like all
- 27:02the stuff didn't ex like I remember when
- 27:03podcasting came out like I was already a
- 27:05business owner. Like none of this stuff
- 27:07existed. But at the time I just took all
- 27:10the money I had. And I I want to I want
- 27:11to make this point again is that people
- 27:14think that the money is about buying
- 27:15courses and stuff like that. And you can
- 27:17like there's nothing wrong with that.
- 27:18I've learned a ton from a lot of the
- 27:19stuff that I've bought to be really
- 27:20honest with you. But I think that I've
- 27:22always had an amazing return on
- 27:23education because I always did it. And I
- 27:26think like I always wanted to be the
- 27:28best student in every class and I was
- 27:29good at school and I and I I just took
- 27:31business as a different another another
- 27:32type of school. But part of the expenses
- 27:34that come into like what you take that
- 27:36money for is experiments that fail. And
- 27:38so one of the things that happens when
- 27:40you're broke is that you bet on stuff
- 27:42and then it doesn't work and people feel
- 27:44like they're back at zero. But you're
- 27:45not back at zero. you're at where you
- 27:47were plus one experience, plus two
- 27:50experiences, plus three experiences,
- 27:51plus four experience. But when you have
- 27:52plus 18 experiences, all of a sudden,
- 27:55boop, you level up one. You get
- 27:57experience points. There's a reason in
- 27:58video games call experience points. So,
- 28:00you didn't trade it for nothing. You got
- 28:01an experience point. And with enough
- 28:03experience points, you get to the next
- 28:04level. And so, I think if you just even
- 28:06thought about it like that, it's not a
- 28:07loss, but an experience point. It could
- 28:08get you could bridge the gap between
- 28:10your current income level and the income
- 28:11level that you want to get to. And then
- 28:12guess what? There's more experience
- 28:14point that you have to get there. And
- 28:15those experience points also cost more
- 28:17money. Because when you take a bet in
- 28:19the beginning, and when I say it costs
- 28:21money, it's like if you run an ad and it
- 28:23doesn't work, it costs money. If you
- 28:25want to set up a Shopify store or an
- 28:27e-commerce store and you spend 30, 40,
- 28:2950 bucks a month, whatever, it costs
- 28:30money. Um, and it does, you know, like
- 28:33all of these things cost money to start.
- 28:35Now, mind you, it cost a lot less than
- 28:36it did in the 20s when you had to
- 28:37mortgage your house and guarantee that
- 28:38you'd win or you'd lose everything
- 28:40forever. Um, so like the bar hasn't
- 28:42never been lower than it is now, but
- 28:44there still is a bar and you have to get
- 28:45over it. And I still think that the vast
- 28:47majority of the [ __ ] that people trying
- 28:48to get over has nothing to do with the
- 28:50difficulty of business. But the first
- 28:52step, the foundation, which is it is my
- 28:53fault that I am here and in it being my
- 28:57fault, I am the one who can get me out
- 28:58of it. It sounds like in that stage
- 29:01three when you start experimenting and
- 29:02investing in that and let's say the kid
- 29:05who has a failed drop shipping
- 29:06experiment or starts a school group and
- 29:07they want to win the school games but
- 29:09they don't. Their measuring stick for
- 29:10whether or not they're doing [snorts]
- 29:11well shouldn't be how much money they're
- 29:13making
- 29:14>> or should like should they be thinking
- 29:16about money at that point or
- 29:19>> so the wealthiest people I know
- 29:22only think about skills. They think
- 29:25about what can I learn and then what can
- 29:26this skill get me? And so they will
- 29:30always
- 29:32take any money they can to buy more
- 29:34skills.
- 29:36And in the beginning, you have to buy
- 29:38all the skills yourself. Once you have
- 29:41enough skills that you can generate an
- 29:42excess of income, you can start buying
- 29:44other people's lives. And what I mean by
- 29:46that is like everything comes down to
- 29:47buying time. And so at some point you're
- 29:5110 years into your career and you have a
- 29:52handful of skills, but you can buy
- 29:54someone else's 10 years of skills by
- 29:56just paying them to do something, too.
- 29:57is you don't have to learn all those
- 29:58things. And so you do need to get good
- 30:00at stuff and then eventually you
- 30:02generalize to being good at people. And
- 30:03that's pretty much always the path for
- 30:04everyone.
- 30:05>> Maybe the framing is like a lot of
- 30:07people who are wanting to make more
- 30:08money just don't know what the avenues
- 30:10are.
- 30:10>> Yeah. So a lot of people who want to
- 30:13make money don't understand how money is
- 30:15made. And so it's made by getting it
- 30:19from someone else and they have to give
- 30:21it to you voluntarily or it's theft. And
- 30:23so assuming you don't want to steal,
- 30:25then you have to give something to
- 30:27someone else first. And then by doing
- 30:30that, they give you money in exchange,
- 30:32which is why I love capitalism. It's
- 30:34voluntary exchange between two parties.
- 30:36And both parties say thank you at the
- 30:38end because both parties think they're
- 30:39better off from the trade. And so the
- 30:42idea is what you want to be able to do
- 30:44is find something valuable to trade. And
- 30:47so you can either trade stuff, you can
- 30:50find a place where you can get stuff and
- 30:52then bring it to other people where it's
- 30:54convenient for them so they pay you more
- 30:56than you did when you had to go find it
- 30:57at some back alley cuz you know suburban
- 31:00mom doesn't want to go into back alley
- 31:02to get x y and z but you'll give it to
- 31:04her. Man, it sounds like I'm explaining
- 31:05drugs, but [laughter]
- 31:08well, there's a reason they make money.
- 31:09But anyways, point is is that you can
- 31:11sell stuff at a mar at a margin and a
- 31:14part of that margin is going to be the
- 31:15convenience that you deliver them. And
- 31:17either you're selling stuff that someone
- 31:18else manufactures or you create your own
- 31:19stuff. Now, if you're starting out,
- 31:20you're probably going to sell someone
- 31:21else's stuff. And I do think and I I
- 31:23mean I'm saying this right now,
- 31:26I do love the concept that the first
- 31:29thing you sell is not the last thing
- 31:30you're going to sell. And so learning to
- 31:33sell in and of itself, the best way to
- 31:34learn to sell is sell something. And
- 31:36that's why uh referral referral uh
- 31:39programs, ambassador programs, affiliate
- 31:41programs for different types of
- 31:42businesses, almost every business I've
- 31:44ever owned has an affiliate program. Um
- 31:46it's great to enroll in those. I'm not
- 31:48even going to say any of the names of
- 31:49the companies that that we have because
- 31:50I want you like it's not about that. I
- 31:52want you to if you can just because then
- 31:54you you only have to figure out one
- 31:56skill. Like if I just sell someone, if I
- 31:57just promote, I get paid. Cool. And I
- 31:59can just do it over and over again. Now
- 32:01over time you're like, man, I want to
- 32:02make more of the nut. Cool. Then you
- 32:04just you eat up more of the
- 32:05responsibility.
- 32:07So you can either sell stuff or you can
- 32:11sell skills. You can scale sell
- 32:13outcomes. And so that's where you
- 32:15develop a certain expertise. So like in
- 32:17the beginning for me and like the first
- 32:18time this ever like the first money I
- 32:21ever made from a stranger was that I had
- 32:23a lady at the gym. It's a real story. I
- 32:26was in really good shape. I like to
- 32:28think so. And she said,"Will you meet me
- 32:31uh and do a nutrition consultation for
- 32:33me?" And she didn't even say that. She
- 32:35said, "Will you help me with my food?" I
- 32:36think is what she said. And I said,
- 32:37"Sure." Um, and so we met at a at a
- 32:40pizza place, ironically.
- 32:42>> No, this was after college. This is
- 32:44after I graduated from college um when I
- 32:46was still consultant. So I I went we met
- 32:48at a pizza place. And I was like, "Okay,
- 32:51well, what are you currently eating?"
- 32:53And she was like, "This." And I was
- 32:54like, "Well, what do you want to do?"
- 32:55She's like, "I'm trying to lose weight."
- 32:56And I was like, "Well, this is something
- 32:58I eat for breakfast that's less calories
- 33:00than your thing. It's pretty good." And
- 33:01try this and try this and try this. And
- 33:02it took like an hour. And then um I had
- 33:05like a notepad and I gave her the the
- 33:07notes or whatever. And she took out her
- 33:08purse and she wrote $200 on a check and
- 33:11she handed it to me. She was like,
- 33:12"Thanks so much." And I was like
- 33:17looked I was just like looking at the
- 33:19check, looking at her, looking at the
- 33:20check, looking at her. And I was like,
- 33:21"Okay, don't act surprised." And I was
- 33:22like, "Uh, thanks." And then she left
- 33:25and I was like, "Holy shit." I was like,
- 33:27"I just got paid for." But like
- 33:29realistically, I'd been in at this point
- 33:30I was competing. So I'm winning. I'm
- 33:32like I had a state record at that point.
- 33:33Like I was in I was in shape, you know
- 33:34what I mean? Um and I think she knew I
- 33:37was a state record holder cuz the gym
- 33:39that I was powerlifting gym. Um but I
- 33:42had done some stuff. I had gotten some
- 33:44level of authority on some tiny thing
- 33:46and people were like, "Oh, can you help
- 33:49me with that, too?" And to be really
- 33:51honest with you, my entire life, and I'm
- 33:53saying like there's many paths, but like
- 33:55my life has been
- 33:57learn something, get good at it, have
- 33:59evidence that you were good at the
- 34:00thing, and then people ask you for help
- 34:02on that thing. And so, in the beginning,
- 34:03people asked me how to get in shape. And
- 34:05then I started a business around getting
- 34:06people in shape. And then people who had
- 34:08businesses around getting people in
- 34:09shape asked me how I was getting my
- 34:11businesses that were getting people in
- 34:12shape to work. And then people who had
- 34:14businesses that were national scale that
- 34:16helped people in a specific niche or
- 34:17industry started asking me how I was
- 34:19helping people in a specific niche or
- 34:20industry. And then people who had really
- 34:22big businesses just started asking me
- 34:23how did you get a really big business?
- 34:24And so like my entire life been simply
- 34:27doing as hard as I [ __ ] could to get
- 34:29good at something and then do it enough
- 34:31times. And to be really like very clear
- 34:33with you, every time I did it, it was
- 34:35not to move on to the next step. It was
- 34:37to just get good at the thing. And then
- 34:39by getting good at the thing, people
- 34:40asked me about it. And so it wasn't like
- 34:42I lost 10 pounds and then tried to start
- 34:44selling, you know, weight loss advice. I
- 34:47had multiple state records and I like
- 34:50I looked good, you know what I mean?
- 34:52Like I was in very good shape. And then
- 34:55people started asking me about it. And
- 34:56then I didn't have one gym and start
- 34:59telling people, hey, here's how you run
- 35:00a I had six gyms by the time I was 26.
- 35:03And then people were like, okay, you're
- 35:0426 and you have six gyms and you did all
- 35:06cash flow. Like you're doing something
- 35:07right. And then people started asking me
- 35:10about the stuff. And then and then when
- 35:12I had the licensing business doing 4
- 35:14million a month, people who had other
- 35:16bigger businesses are doing a million a
- 35:17month or 500,000 a month. They're like,
- 35:18"How do you get to 4 million a month?"
- 35:19And I was like, "Well, this is what I
- 35:21did." And so, like, I've just tried to
- 35:23figure it out. And it's it's like the
- 35:26path has always been revealed as I took
- 35:27more steps. And so, I think a big
- 35:30fallacy in the early on days is trying
- 35:31to think that you're going to figure out
- 35:32the entire path before you even take the
- 35:33first step.
- 35:34>> It's just not true. Real quick, I have
- 35:36the most amazing offer for you, which is
- 35:39all three of my books for free. Uh, just
- 35:43cover the shipping. I think it's like
- 35:44five or six bucks in shipping uh per
- 35:46book. Um, you get the actual hardback
- 35:48shipped to you. And the reason for that
- 35:50is because some of you guys may know we
- 35:52had 3.6 million copies that were donated
- 35:53from entrepreneurs. And I'm doing my
- 35:55part to give the books away, but I'm
- 35:57also giving the other two books uh to
- 36:00anyone who want them, who choose to
- 36:02redeem it. All right. Last time I made
- 36:03this offer, uh, it sold out in like 10
- 36:06days. Uh, so I did buy a lot more books.
- 36:08Um, so if you see this, you know, go
- 36:10check it out. Go grab them. Um, these
- 36:11are obviously while supplies last. Um,
- 36:13because this lives in the video forever.
- 36:15And if you get there and it's not there,
- 36:16then, you know, don't get upset. All
- 36:18right, back to the video.
- 36:20>> I was going to ask, how important is it
- 36:21for someone to have that moment with the
- 36:23check where they just make their first
- 36:25Oh,
- 36:25>> I mean, in some ways, I think it's
- 36:26everything. In other ways, it's nothing.
- 36:27Like one of the cool um shameless plug
- 36:30for school, the um
- 36:3330.44% of people who finish their first
- 36:35month of school make their first dollar
- 36:36online. And that's like so like
- 36:41like that's why we do it. You know what
- 36:43I mean? Like I know how hard that first
- 36:46dollar is. Like there's so much to get
- 36:48the first dollar across the because the
- 36:49second dollar comes so much faster after
- 36:51that. Um that I mean that's why that's
- 36:54why I invest in the company. That's why
- 36:55I'm so adamant about it. But um anyways,
- 37:00the the point is is that yes, I think
- 37:03having the first dollar get across is
- 37:04very important. But if you can reframe
- 37:07it from that experience points
- 37:08perspective, that there's there's
- 37:09there's probably three levels before
- 37:11that. You have to like level one is that
- 37:13you have to understand that it's my
- 37:14fault. Level two is that you have to use
- 37:17what you have, not what you wish you had
- 37:19to get to where you want to go. And
- 37:21where you want to go isn't 100 steps
- 37:22forward. It's just the next step. And so
- 37:24like I don't think that anger drives me
- 37:26as much as it used to,
- 37:29but it was everything that I had when I
- 37:31started. And so if I had listened to the
- 37:34positivity mantra when I started, I
- 37:36never would have gotten going because
- 37:37nothing made me feel happy. And so they
- 37:40were like, "Follow your passion." I was
- 37:41like, "My passion is to not be poor and
- 37:44to not be here in Baltimore. That's my
- 37:47passion is not be here." And so that's
- 37:50what drove me. And so I think that it
- 37:52just needs to be restated that like
- 37:55is that the goal? Sure. But is that
- 37:58necessary to start? No, it's not. And so
- 38:02I can tell you that even when I was
- 38:03angry um and getting through that,
- 38:06making more money did make my life
- 38:08better. Like I had more ability to deal
- 38:10with inconveniences, hassles, health
- 38:12issues from family members that I had to
- 38:14foot the bill for. Like all these things
- 38:15like money can provide value. And so,
- 38:19um, I'll say this thing that a mentor
- 38:21told me. He said, "Money does not buy
- 38:22happiness, but it can help you avoid
- 38:24pain."
- 38:25And so, like, I think there's nothing
- 38:28wrong with getting with making money.
- 38:30Obviously, I like doing it. Um, but I
- 38:34just hate
- 38:36the people who espouse that you have to
- 38:38feel a certain way to win or that or
- 38:42that winning when you are angry or sad
- 38:45or in pain or ashamed is somehow wrong.
- 38:49And so I just like you have to meet
- 38:51success where you're at. And if the
- 38:53first step you have to take out of anger
- 38:54and the next step you have to take out
- 38:56of sadness and the next one you have to
- 38:57take out of shame and use that to to
- 38:59propel yourself forward. All that
- 39:00matters you take the step.
- 39:03And one of the things that I always like
- 39:04is for a very long time I didn't
- 39:05consider myself a good person. I mean, I
- 39:07still probably don't, but um in terms of
- 39:10like I I always identified with the
- 39:12villain um and the oppressor in most
- 39:15scenarios, which is bad. But anyways,
- 39:18but I there's a point to this is that I
- 39:22never thought that I deserved
- 39:25the good life. I never thought I didn't
- 39:26think I deserve the happy ending. I'll
- 39:28put it that way. And so
- 39:32the thing that got me through that was
- 39:35the idea, and this felt like honestly
- 39:36like gaming the system. So like from the
- 39:39evil side, was that I could still get
- 39:42the good guy's ending if I just did the
- 39:45thing that they do to get the ending. So
- 39:49I didn't have to do it with pure
- 39:51intentions. I didn't have to do it as a
- 39:53great guy, but if I just still did the
- 39:56things, I could still get the getting.
- 39:58And I think for me that that realization
- 40:01has been why my ruthless focus on like
- 40:04well what did you do? And to everyone
- 40:06who listens to my stuff like it's like
- 40:07great throw the emotions out. Throw the
- 40:11spiritual energy vibrations out. What do
- 40:13you do?
- 40:15Patience is just figuring out what to do
- 40:17in the meantime. Like courage is acting
- 40:20as though you weren't afraid. Like like
- 40:23what do you do? And then eliminating
- 40:25everything else and then just doing that
- 40:26and then doing whatever mental tricks
- 40:28you have to do which is like there were
- 40:29slaves who work seven days a week. So
- 40:30can I like and then alternatively
- 40:35catastrophizing
- 40:37the alternative path which is that if I
- 40:39do not do anything
- 40:41this is what will happen eventually that
- 40:43pain in the future will be my pain today
- 40:46and then actively thinking about what
- 40:48that pain would be like and then seeing
- 40:50if that can make you more uncomfortable
- 40:52than the comfort that you're in. And I
- 40:54think I mean I think Tony Robbins says
- 40:55this. He says change happens when the
- 40:58pain of staying the same sorry when the
- 41:00pain of change is less than the pain of
- 41:02staying the same. And so if you're
- 41:03comfortable in staying the same the
- 41:05point is to make yourself more in pain
- 41:08to get yourself to move. And so I think
- 41:11there's a skill in being able to future
- 41:13pace and think through what pain you're
- 41:16going to go through. Like if you're like
- 41:17man okay I have gained 5 pounds a year
- 41:20and it has been four years so I'm 20
- 41:22pounds up. Well, if four years from now
- 41:25I'm another 20 pounds heavier and
- 41:27imagining the snide comments at the
- 41:30holiday party or the if you're a girl,
- 41:33the guy who says, "Man, she'd be really
- 41:35cute if she lost 40 lbs." Or like even
- 41:39like I'm I'm going girls perspective
- 41:40here. A guy who says something that's
- 41:42like, "Um,
- 41:44I would be with her, but she's just
- 41:46she's just too fat. She's just not cute
- 41:48enough." And you're like, "Wow, that's
- 41:50so politically incorrect." Deal with it.
- 41:52It's [ __ ] life.
- 41:55But the thing is is like your thoughts
- 41:57don't need to be politically correct.
- 41:58They're your thoughts. They're no one
- 41:59else's thoughts. And so whatever you
- 42:00have to do to get yourself there. And
- 42:02for me, the idea that a girl that I
- 42:04would want to be with would be like, I
- 42:05just don't think he's ambitious enough.
- 42:06I don't think he's successful enough.
- 42:08Like that those ideas killed me. And so
- 42:10I never wanted to be denied entry to
- 42:12somewhere because I didn't have these
- 42:14things. Now, do I believe that people
- 42:17should be denied entry? No. But I also
- 42:18realize that's the way the world is. And
- 42:20so you I think you can balance both
- 42:21beliefs. Like I'd love things to be
- 42:22different, but I accept the fact that
- 42:24they're not.
- 42:24>> Does this feel like a good argument for
- 42:26getting rid of other broke friends?
- 42:27Because I bet other broke friends reduce
- 42:29the pain of staying the same.
- 42:30>> A friend who supports you is someone who
- 42:34deliberately
- 42:36decreases the possibility of failure.
- 42:40And so if you look at your friends and
- 42:43you ask yourself, does this person
- 42:45increase or decrease the possibility of
- 42:47failure with my goal? It's very easy to
- 42:49answer that question. It's yes or no.
- 42:51It's increase or decrease. There's no in
- 42:52between. Do they increase or they
- 42:53decrease my possibility that I get to my
- 42:55goal? If the answer is decrease,
- 42:59then get rid of them. Because imagine
- 43:01that you have a 100% chance of hitting
- 43:04your goal and you have three friends
- 43:05that have a 30% decrease. Like you might
- 43:08now have a have a [ __ ] you know,
- 43:10whatever a third times three is,
- 43:11whatever. You have 27% chance of hitting
- 43:13your goal now because you have three
- 43:14terrible friends.
- 43:15>> Like negative experience.
- 43:16>> Yeah. Yeah. They're they're they're it's
- 43:19like getting in video games. It's like
- 43:21you've got somebody who's casting like a
- 43:22slow spell on you and you're like moving
- 43:24so slow and you're like weak and like
- 43:26all your all your hits have like half
- 43:27power. Like
- 43:30a lot of people need to shed
- 43:33friendships, but the thing is it's more
- 43:34that they call them friends, but they're
- 43:36not really friends. They're just there.
- 43:39And they're there because they've always
- 43:40been there, but not because they should
- 43:42be there, but because they're going to
- 43:44help you get to where you want to go.
- 43:45They just they're just there. They
- 43:47exist. They're not going anywhere. They
- 43:49don't have goals and they're at a
- 43:51different part in their journey. There's
- 43:52nothing wrong with that. But if you're
- 43:53going to start the path of of of
- 43:56drinking glass and starting to to to
- 43:58double time, you got to live your life
- 43:59and you got to live tomorrow's life and
- 44:00the next day's life and start dragging
- 44:02that towards you, they're going to
- 44:05they're going to be upset about it. And
- 44:08so one of the sayings I recently have
- 44:10that I like a lot which is there are no
- 44:13social obligations only social
- 44:15consequences.
- 44:16And the people who want to deliver those
- 44:19consequences often do it by talking to
- 44:22you less and by avoiding you more. They
- 44:25try to spend less time with you and talk
- 44:27to you less to punish you for the fact
- 44:29that you missed the party. You missed
- 44:30the going out. You didn't show up to
- 44:31their wedding. You didn't show up to
- 44:32their dogs christening or whatever.
- 44:36But the crazy thing is is that if you
- 44:38felt obligated to go, then it means you
- 44:41didn't want to go. And if it mean that
- 44:44means that if you didn't want to go and
- 44:45the punishment of not going is that you
- 44:47don't have to go more in the future
- 44:48because they avoid you. They don't
- 44:49invite you anymore. Then to me that's a
- 44:51win-win. You save time today and you
- 44:54save time tomorrow. And I don't
- 44:55understand why people are not willing to
- 44:57deal with that. Like just looking at
- 44:58what happens rather than whatever
- 45:00emotional noise they make with their
- 45:01face at you like moving past that.
- 45:03Great. You expelled air at me.
- 45:05Understood. Got it. But the outcome is
- 45:07you will no longer invite me, which is
- 45:09what I want. Great. I feel like we won
- 45:12here. And so thinking second and third
- 45:16order outcomes from what happens when I
- 45:19quote break up with this friend or what
- 45:21happens when I offend this friend. A lot
- 45:23of times it's you closer to your goal.
- 45:26And I've always been okay with that. And
- 45:29like if someone if someone like
- 45:34the moment I have seen somebody as
- 45:36decreasing the likelihood to hit my
- 45:37goal, I am happy to tell them that like
- 45:41I think I think you are not good for me.
- 45:44I don't think you help me hit what I
- 45:45want to hit. And they be like, well then
- 45:47they'll try and downgrade your goals and
- 45:49say you shouldn't believe this way. And
- 45:50then they'll cast their beliefs on you.
- 45:52And for me it's like that's amazing that
- 45:54you believe that. I don't believe that
- 45:55and I don't really want to believe what
- 45:57you believe because then I would have
- 45:58your life and I certainly don't want
- 45:59that. And so like again I I you I make
- 46:03these tweets about this but it's like if
- 46:05you don't like their life don't listen
- 46:06to what they say. Like don't take their
- 46:08advice if you don't like what you see.
- 46:10And so if everyone around you has a life
- 46:14you don't want then don't listen to any
- 46:16of their advice. Like, and hopefully
- 46:18you're listening to this and you're
- 46:19watching. If there's some element of my
- 46:21life or whatever that you find awesome,
- 46:22cool. Then maybe some element of what I
- 46:24can share is helpful for you. Um, but
- 46:27you have to put blinders on because
- 46:28there is a period of time where you, and
- 46:30I mean, I've said this, but you you're
- 46:32not going to be successful enough for
- 46:33the next tier of friends, but you're too
- 46:35different from the friends that you used
- 46:36to have. And so, that middle path is
- 46:39very lonely. But the good thing about
- 46:41loneliness is you've got time. And right
- 46:42now, time is what you need because you
- 46:44got to learn stuff. You got to get the
- 46:45skills so you can start trading that for
- 46:46more and more money. And then you can
- 46:47take the money and trade that for more
- 46:49money. But in the beginning, you just
- 46:50have time and that's what you have to
- 46:52spend. And so if you are broke or you
- 46:55are poor and wish to no longer be broken
- 46:57poor,
- 47:00the first is owning the fact that
- 47:03everything that has to do with your life
- 47:04is your fault.
- 47:06And a lot of people will reject that.
- 47:08And you're right. Stay poor. You're
- 47:10totally right. You'll never be
- 47:11successful. You're totally right. I
- 47:14believe you.
- 47:16The next step is being willing to use
- 47:21what you have rather than what you think
- 47:22you should have or what you wish you
- 47:24had. The circumstances, the connections,
- 47:26the money, whatever, the passion, the
- 47:29purpose, the meaning behind the work.
- 47:32You can wish for all that stuff, but you
- 47:34don't have it. So, you have to use what
- 47:35you have, which could be anger, could be
- 47:37shame, could be pain, whatever.
- 47:41And then
- 47:43as soon as you start taking action,
- 47:45everyone around you will collapse and
- 47:48try to pull you down. And so the only
- 47:50way to protect yourself against that is
- 47:52to increase
- 47:54your own approval of self and decrease
- 47:58how much their opinion of you matters.
- 48:01Which means that you have to be you have
- 48:03to be proud of you for taking the step
- 48:06and actively look at their lives and
- 48:09think do I want what they have? If the
- 48:12answer is no, then do not listen to what
- 48:14they say.
- 48:17And then when you do that, you keep
- 48:20walking. You keep taking steps
- 48:22no matter how painful it is. And you
- 48:24never stop.
- 48:26And if you do that, you will get there.
- 48:30That's it. Cool.
- 48:33>> In your 20s, you don't need to find
- 48:34yourself. You need to build yourself.
- 48:36Here are 18 tactical lessons I learned
- 48:39about achieving early success.
- 48:40>> I made my first million at 26. I crossed
- 48:42100 million in net worth at age 31. And
- 48:44this is my road map for things that I
- 48:45learned along the way. I'd like to
- 48:47normalize a 6 day a week, 12-hour per
- 48:51day work week for men between 16 and 28.
- 48:55And despite all the self-worth voodoo
- 48:58that social media and society will tell
- 49:00you, you are valued based on your
- 49:02utility. And when you're young, you have
- 49:05none. But you have a lot of energy. And
- 49:08so trade that energy for experience
- 49:09points and become useful. The first rule
- 49:12of entrepreneurship according to Alex is
- 49:14use what you've got. And the reason I
- 49:16like that is because many people always
- 49:18don't start things because they don't
- 49:21have the capital. They don't have the
- 49:22connections. They don't have the
- 49:24whatever insert insecurity or projection
- 49:27of blame and power they want to put on.
- 49:29But the first rule is you use what you
- 49:31have. And so it's about resourcefulness,
- 49:34not resources. And so if you have
- 49:36energy, you use the resource you have.
- 49:38You use what you've got to trade to
- 49:41develop experience, to develop proof
- 49:43that you can get good at a skill. And
- 49:45you only get good at the skill by not
- 49:46being good at a skill and repeating it
- 49:48and then failing at each time and then
- 49:50making incremental improvements which
- 49:51take many many repetitions until you
- 49:53actually get good. And this may be a
- 49:55little controversial, but I'm not here
- 49:57to be nice to you. I'm trying to be
- 49:59kind, which might mean that it hurts a
- 50:01little bit. So, let's make this
- 50:02practical. If you have less than
- 50:04$100,000 in savings and you would like
- 50:07to have $100,000 or more in savings,
- 50:09these are the things that I would
- 50:10recommend doing. And that means that you
- 50:11have to check out your ego. It's your
- 50:13ego is gone for this. All right? You
- 50:14don't care what other people think
- 50:15because they're not going to be there in
- 50:1710 years. All right? Because you have a
- 50:18whole new group of friends that are way
- 50:19[ __ ] better and cooler. So, one, stop
- 50:21eating out. Discount groceries only.
- 50:23That's if you're super poor. If here's
- 50:26my caveat, if you know how to make
- 50:28money, you already have a base level of
- 50:30skills, then eating Chipotle and
- 50:32whatever, whatever you can Door Dash it
- 50:34in so that you can keep working. The
- 50:36moment I realized I can make $500 every
- 50:3830 minutes by selling, I was like, "Oh,
- 50:40I'm never buying I'm never cooking food
- 50:42or grocery shopping ever again."
- 50:43Anything that was less than $500 an hour
- 50:46was was now immediately outsourced. All
- 50:48right? But this advice is for people who
- 50:51are super broke. Okay? So, if you don't
- 50:53have the skill set yet at all and you're
- 50:57struggling to just get things going,
- 50:59then you need to be completely on the
- 51:00defensive so that you can have enough
- 51:02money so that you can start taking bets.
- 51:04Because the only way that you're going
- 51:05to get ahead is that you have to make
- 51:07bets. You got to make bets on education.
- 51:09You got to make bets on opportunities.
- 51:10You got to make bets on inventory. You
- 51:11got to make make bets on software. or
- 51:13you want to start a Shopify store, you
- 51:14want to start a school community, you
- 51:16want to start something, it's still
- 51:17going to cost some money, right? You
- 51:19might have to buy a camera, you have to
- 51:20buy some software that helps you edit
- 51:21videos, like there's some expenses. All
- 51:23right? And so having a big stockpile
- 51:26allows you to be patient. The the more
- 51:28money you have, the longer you out you
- 51:30can think because you don't have to
- 51:31worry about tomorrow. You know that next
- 51:33month and the month after and the month
- 51:34after taking care of because even if you
- 51:35made no money, you've got enough. That's
- 51:37how you can start thinking long term.
- 51:38People are like, "Think think long term.
- 51:40Think long term." But like unless if you
- 51:41have payroll and you've got or you've
- 51:43got rent or you've got you've got
- 51:44groceries to pay, you can't think long
- 51:46term because you're in survival mode.
- 51:48And so I'm trying to get survival to be
- 51:50as low as humanly possible for you so
- 51:52that you could get into thrive mode. But
- 51:54it's all relative. If you make 40 grand
- 51:56a month and spend 40 grand a month,
- 51:57you're going to be in the same survival
- 51:58mode. But if you make 40 grand a month
- 52:00and spend four, you're going to have
- 52:01you're going to have every month you
- 52:03make 10 months worth of income. And so
- 52:05in two months, you've got you've got 20
- 52:07months saved up. You're good. And then
- 52:08you can get super aggressive with that
- 52:10other 36 and start really betting to to
- 52:12double down. All right, so here's the
- 52:15very broke five, six things that you can
- 52:18do to immediately spend way less. One,
- 52:21stop eating out. Discount groceries
- 52:22only. Two, stop buying new clothes. Go
- 52:24to Goodwill only. Three, only attend
- 52:27free friend events. All right, so think
- 52:29of what I just said. Think about all the
- 52:31events that friends will tell you to
- 52:32come to. weddings, bachelor parties, uh
- 52:35birthdays, um just nights out because
- 52:38it's Thursday, whatever. Only attend
- 52:41free friend events. And if they don't
- 52:43support your goals, they are not your
- 52:44friends. Think about that. If I said,
- 52:47"Hey, I've got this goal." And I said,
- 52:49"Hey, there's this human being and he
- 52:50wants to get you to not have that goal.
- 52:51Would you describe them as a friend or
- 52:52an enemy?"
- 52:54Think about it. Some of you, some of the
- 52:57people in your life that you call
- 52:58friends are actually your enemies. You
- 53:01just don't know it.
- 53:03Now, four, take the rest of the time
- 53:04that you have to A, apply to jobs that
- 53:07make more than your current job. B, pick
- 53:09up side hustle work. C, learn skills
- 53:12that you can trade for a higher hourly
- 53:14rate than you currently do.
- 53:17When I say trade, I mean you make more
- 53:18per hour than what your current current
- 53:20skills pay you. All right? And then
- 53:22five, find the hardest worker in the
- 53:24room when you enter that new job or that
- 53:26new place and then double their level of
- 53:29input. So if they knock on a 100 doors,
- 53:31you knock on 200. They make a 100 dials,
- 53:33you make 200 dials, right? When I had
- 53:35Jacob, my young neighbor, I gave him
- 53:37this exact advice. And he was expected
- 53:40to on his team do a $100 a day. He did
- 53:42between 300 and 400. And so guess what?
- 53:45He got better faster. And then once you
- 53:47follow all of those steps, this is what
- 53:49you need to do next. Wait 36 months. And
- 53:52this is what I mean by patient with your
- 53:54outputs, impatient with your inputs. And
- 53:57the crazy thing is that you can change
- 54:00your life in one decision. I can get
- 54:02drunk, drive in a car, and change my
- 54:04life forever. Right? I can happen like
- 54:06that. But it can happen just like that
- 54:08the other way. It's just that the
- 54:09outcome's delayed. That's the only
- 54:11difference. You can change your life
- 54:12today in this moment by making these
- 54:14decisions and the and your life path
- 54:17will have veered. You will have changed
- 54:19direction. Your tree of of life will
- 54:21move. It's just that it takes time for
- 54:23that new direction to bear fruit.
- 54:25Whereas you can poison the fruit in a
- 54:26second. You can kill a tree real fast.
- 54:28You just can't grow one real fast. But
- 54:30it doesn't mean that if a seed's planted
- 54:31and you're watering it, it's not
- 54:32growing. It just takes a second to get
- 54:34above the surface. I think you can solve
- 54:36a lot of male problems by getting in
- 54:38shape and making money. You'll still
- 54:40have problems. They'll just be smaller
- 54:43and you'll have more resources to handle
- 54:44them. So, let's talk about the making
- 54:46money part first.
- 54:48Fundamentally, in order to make money,
- 54:50you have to provide value to some
- 54:51someone, either an employer or
- 54:53customers. But either way, you have
- 54:55utility which you exchange for money.
- 54:57And so by making that a goal, then it
- 55:00means that you're going to increase your
- 55:02own usefulness. And so somebody who is
- 55:05more useful all of a sudden develops
- 55:07other ancillary skills around that
- 55:09utility that they can use in other parts
- 55:11of their lives. If you're good at sales,
- 55:12guess what you can do when you're
- 55:14talking to girls? You can use the same
- 55:16conversational skill set. If you're
- 55:18trying to negotiate uh a purchase for a
- 55:20car or a house or whatever, like those
- 55:23skills generalize. They transfer across
- 55:26domains. And so a lot of people think
- 55:27it's like, well, when would I ever be a
- 55:29salesperson or when would I ever be a
- 55:31outbound what like it doesn't matter.
- 55:33It's not about that thing. The thing is
- 55:35it's like real life skills actually do
- 55:37generalize. Like this isn't elementary
- 55:39school or or middle school when you're
- 55:41learning calculus or algebra or whatever
- 55:43and thinking like what am I going to use
- 55:44this in real life? One, it is real life
- 55:46right now. Two,
- 55:48these skills do get used across domains.
- 55:52Of all of my friends who are sent to
- 55:53millionaires and billionaires to a
- 55:55person, they started in what I would
- 55:58consider a high volume sales
- 56:01environment. So that's either
- 56:03door-nocking, cold calling, or some sort
- 56:07of in-person business where they had
- 56:09many, many, many conversations with
- 56:11strangers on a daily basis. And I think
- 56:13there, and I'm talking not like a a a
- 56:16month or six months. I'm talking like
- 56:18three, five years where no one knew
- 56:20their name. They were just some faceless
- 56:22representative that stood there at the
- 56:25door, saw people, sold memberships, sold
- 56:28insurance, sold solar, sold whatever.
- 56:32And the thing is is like skill
- 56:34development happens through volume and
- 56:36feedback loops. So it's the number of
- 56:38repetitions you have times the amount of
- 56:40improvement between repetitions. Brute
- 56:42forcing the amount of volume definitely
- 56:44will help if you can give yourself
- 56:45feedback. I've seen people say, "Hey,
- 56:47I've actually made a hundred pieces of
- 56:49content." Now, this is like 1% of people
- 56:50because most people do nothing. But of
- 56:53the 1% of people who say, "Okay, I post
- 56:55it every day for a year." The thing is
- 56:56is they didn't do the most important
- 56:58part, which is you don't just like make
- 57:00a video and post it and just every day
- 57:01like, "Hey, make a video, post it, make
- 57:03a video, post it." You have to look at
- 57:04what you did and what you could do
- 57:06better. Fundamentally, that is the the
- 57:08cornerstone of feedback. And so you look
- 57:10at the top 10 videos you made over the
- 57:12last month and you say, "Okay, how do I
- 57:14do more of that and how do I do less of
- 57:15the bottom 10%." And you just pick one
- 57:17thing that you did well there and you
- 57:18try and do it in every video going
- 57:20forward. And that develops a checklist
- 57:22of things to do so that you develop a
- 57:24skill. And so speaking from my own
- 57:26experience, the first sales conversation
- 57:28I ever had, first off, I had zero sales
- 57:30training. No one was like, "Hey, this is
- 57:32the script. This is how you go over."
- 57:33They're like, "Hey, here's a new lady.
- 57:36Go sign her up." And so I was like,
- 57:39"Okay." And I didn't even know this was
- 57:41a sale. I didn't know the I didn't know
- 57:42the term sales. I just he said, "Go sign
- 57:45her up." And I said, "Okay." And so I
- 57:47walked over and I and she was like,
- 57:49"Hey, you know, I want to know more
- 57:50about the gym." And I said, "Well, what
- 57:52do you want to know?" [laughter]
- 57:54And she was like, "Well, I mean, like,
- 57:56how much is it?" And I was like, "Oh,
- 57:58it's uh whatever, 150 bucks a month."
- 58:00And she was like, "Okay." And I was
- 58:02like, "You want to sign up?" And she
- 58:04said, "I left my credit card at home."
- 58:07And I was like, "Okay." And she was
- 58:08like, "I'll be back with the credit
- 58:10card." And I was like, "Cool." And so I
- 58:12walked out and uh it was like 2 minutes,
- 58:14right? And I walked out and the owner
- 58:17Sam was there with a few of other other
- 58:18gym owners. He had bought a few gym
- 58:20owners in. So it was like three or four
- 58:21gym owners there. And [snorts] uh he was
- 58:23like, "Damn." He was like, "That was
- 58:25fast." And I was like, "Yeah." And he's
- 58:26like, "You closed her?" And I was like,
- 58:27"Yeah." And and he was like, "With a
- 58:30credit card?" And I was like, "Oh, no.
- 58:33She's she's going to go get it and
- 58:34she'll be back." And they just looked at
- 58:36each other and then looked back at me
- 58:38and then just started laughing at me
- 58:40uncontrollably, like couldn't breathe at
- 58:42how dumb what I had just said was. And
- 58:44the thing is is I had no experience. And
- 58:46I and I tell that story because so many
- 58:49people assume that like I walked out of
- 58:51the womb closing deals, you know what I
- 58:53mean? Like, hey nurse, what are you
- 58:54doing later? You know what I mean? Like,
- 58:56[laughter]
- 58:58but it wasn't like that, right? Like I
- 59:00didn't know I I didn't I didn't even
- 59:02know the term. And so, you know, over
- 59:05time, I just started developing like,
- 59:06okay, well, what do you do? And I
- 59:08watched other people. So, I was like,
- 59:09okay, they start with asking them why
- 59:10someone's there. Ask them about their
- 59:12goals, ask them things that they've done
- 59:13in the past that didn't work. I like,
- 59:14okay, that that that seems to work.
- 59:16Okay. And then when they ask them to
- 59:18buy, then if they don't want to say yes,
- 59:20they ask them more questions rather than
- 59:22just saying, okay. So, I started to
- 59:23develop at least an understanding of the
- 59:25framework of how sales occurred. But I
- 59:26still wasn't good, right? And so then I
- 59:29went through like that rocky cut scene
- 59:30period where this is where I'm very
- 59:32grateful for this is that uh Facebook
- 59:34ads is when I started running them in
- 59:352013 were super cheap. And so it
- 59:38actually gave me so many repetitions cuz
- 59:42not only was I taking 15 to 20 consults
- 59:45a day in person, I was also working
- 59:47leads. And so I'm talking to strangers
- 59:48over the phone to set the appointments.
- 59:50And so all I got was just names on a
- 59:51list and I would call them set the
- 59:53appointment like who's this again? You
- 59:55know, all of that. Um, and then, and by
- 59:58the way, if you are local, um, you just
- 1:00:00say the name pause with a question mark
- 1:00:02at the beginning. You're like, "John."
- 1:00:04And then they'll be like, "Yeah." You're
- 1:00:06like, "This is Alex." I'd pause and
- 1:00:08they'd be like, they're like, "Who the
- 1:00:10[ __ ] is Alex?" I'd be like, "From
- 1:00:12Facebook. You signed up for blah blah
- 1:00:14blah blah blah our thing." Yeah. I'm
- 1:00:16just calling to make sure that you're
- 1:00:18not a crazy person from the internet.
- 1:00:19And neither am I. I was like, "We're
- 1:00:20actually on the corner of X and Y." I
- 1:00:23was like, "Right next to the 7-Eleven."
- 1:00:24They're like, "Yeah." I'm like, "Okay,
- 1:00:25cool. I just wanted to see what time you
- 1:00:27want to come come by. I was like, we
- 1:00:28have the sweetest facility in the world.
- 1:00:30Not really, but it's uh at least pretty
- 1:00:31decent for this area, but we have five
- 1:00:33out of five coolness. And they were just
- 1:00:35laughing. They be like, I can make it at
- 1:00:37six. And I'm like, six works. I was
- 1:00:38like, do you want a picture of me or
- 1:00:40just of the address? And they're like,
- 1:00:41just the address? I'm like, all right,
- 1:00:43sounds good. I'll text it to you and
- 1:00:44I'll see you later today. Right. So that
- 1:00:46kind like notice the like half giggles
- 1:00:48between each word. like it's it's
- 1:00:50showing that you're a positive tone
- 1:00:52person, high energy, and someone's like,
- 1:00:54"Man, this guy seems cool or this gal
- 1:00:56seems cool, right?" And so they're more
- 1:00:58likely to show up. They're more likely
- 1:00:59now if I maintain that tone. If they
- 1:01:02give me an objection, I can pivot really
- 1:01:04easily. If I'm like neutral or like,
- 1:01:06"Hi, I saw that you signed up on the
- 1:01:07internet for our thing. Uh, would you
- 1:01:09like to come in?" They're like, "Uh,
- 1:01:11well, tell me more about it." Like,
- 1:01:12well, it's just you have no you have no
- 1:01:14room for messing up. And so I always
- 1:01:17tried to have more rapport and bring a
- 1:01:20lot of energy. And the thing is is like
- 1:01:21if you've seen any of my content, I'm
- 1:01:23not naturally like a high energy person.
- 1:01:25Um I will continue to work, which is
- 1:01:27different than being like up here. And
- 1:01:30so I developed a lot of things to try
- 1:01:31and keep myself energized. And so I had
- 1:01:35a small trampoline that I would bounce
- 1:01:37on uh before and between every sales
- 1:01:40appointment. It sounds ridiculous, but
- 1:01:42if you I'm telling it's it's like a
- 1:01:44hundred bucks if you buy one of those
- 1:01:45little trampolines and you bounce either
- 1:01:47between sales calls or between people
- 1:01:50like I'd have people coming in as I was
- 1:01:52still bouncing and I'd be like I know
- 1:01:53this is ridiculous. I was like but try
- 1:01:55and be in a bad mood on a trampoline.
- 1:01:57You can't do it. You can't do it. You
- 1:01:59can't do it. And I challenge you too.
- 1:02:00You can be in a bad mood if you try
- 1:02:01jumping around like you feel like such a
- 1:02:03child. It's ridiculous. But what would
- 1:02:05happen is like I would rel I would also
- 1:02:06get a little bit exercise. My blood
- 1:02:07would keep moving. But it's also just
- 1:02:09like mentally um literally bouncing
- 1:02:13gave me a lot of energy for these
- 1:02:14appointments. And so I say this because
- 1:02:17I developed all of these things over
- 1:02:18time. And so if you're starting out,
- 1:02:21you're not going to be good. That's why
- 1:02:24you're new. You have no experience. But
- 1:02:26there's a difference between there's a
- 1:02:28story that um shoot I can't remember
- 1:02:30where it is, but there was a foreign kid
- 1:02:32who had never seen a banana before. And
- 1:02:35so the adult gave the kid a banana and
- 1:02:39so the banana so the kid took the banana
- 1:02:41and then bit right into it with the skin
- 1:02:43and everything and another child was
- 1:02:46like you're such an idiot and then the
- 1:02:48adult yelled at that child and said no
- 1:02:51he just doesn't know any better and
- 1:02:53there's a very big difference between
- 1:02:54being dumb and being inexperienced right
- 1:02:57now you just don't have reps and so
- 1:03:00you're going to make a lot of mistakes
- 1:03:01like biting into the banana like at for
- 1:03:03just walking letting someone walk away
- 1:03:04assuming it's a close and they say that
- 1:03:06they're just going to come back and call
- 1:03:07you with their credit card, right? By
- 1:03:09the way, that never happens. Um, very
- 1:03:11rarely, but instead, uh, you want to
- 1:03:15just peel that banana. You want to bite
- 1:03:16into the banana, bite into the orange,
- 1:03:18all of those mistakes as quickly as
- 1:03:21possible and not judge yourself for
- 1:03:23making the mistake and see the mistake
- 1:03:25as part of the process of being like
- 1:03:27that didn't work, that didn't work. And
- 1:03:29if I develop enough of these doesn't
- 1:03:30works, then you just kind of walk the
- 1:03:32the minefield and you get to where
- 1:03:35you're trying to go and people are like,
- 1:03:36"Wow, you're so good at this." And
- 1:03:36you're like, "Oh, no, no, I actually
- 1:03:38just know all the things not to say in a
- 1:03:40sale." And then they end up buying. I
- 1:03:42just avoid all that and then they buy.
- 1:03:44And to be clear, I think I have a
- 1:03:46similar piece of advice, but for very
- 1:03:48different reasons of telling young men
- 1:03:50in general or men to work harder. And
- 1:03:53it's not because I think it's some sort
- 1:03:55of, you know, beating your chest, I'm an
- 1:03:58alpha, whatever thing. It's just that
- 1:04:00for me, the point of my life is to
- 1:04:02become the best version of me. And in
- 1:04:04order to do that, I need to learn
- 1:04:05because there's a huge discrepancy
- 1:04:06between where I am and where I want to
- 1:04:07go. And the discrepancy is going to get
- 1:04:10filled with skills, which means that I
- 1:04:12need to do repetitions to acquire
- 1:04:15failures that I can learn from, to get
- 1:04:18better from. And if I can do more of
- 1:04:22that in a shorter period of time, I will
- 1:04:24learn more skills and by definition, I
- 1:04:26will shrink the distance between myself
- 1:04:28and my ideal self. And so that is pretty
- 1:04:31much the only thought process I have
- 1:04:34around this. And I also believe that you
- 1:04:37need to be patient with outputs and
- 1:04:40impatient with inputs. So let me unpack
- 1:04:43that. Patience in general is figuring
- 1:04:46out what to do in the meantime. So when
- 1:04:48someone says, "Hey, be patient," what
- 1:04:49they just mean is figure out something
- 1:04:50else to do in the meantime. And so if
- 1:04:52I'm telling you to be patient with
- 1:04:54outputs, it means that you basically
- 1:04:55just have to figure out something else
- 1:04:56to do in the meantime while you wait for
- 1:04:59outputs to occur because you can't
- 1:05:00output. You can't money doesn't appear.
- 1:05:03You have to do something and then money
- 1:05:04happens, right? But the doing something
- 1:05:06part is the thing that you can control.
- 1:05:08The money happening is the part that you
- 1:05:10don't control that comes afterwards.
- 1:05:11It's an outcome, right? And so when I
- 1:05:14say patient with outputs, that's the
- 1:05:17first part. The second part is impatient
- 1:05:19with inputs. And so if being patient is
- 1:05:21figuring out what to do in the meantime,
- 1:05:23impatience is doing the thing in the
- 1:05:25meantime, right? And so it's the
- 1:05:28opposite of that. It's the thing you do
- 1:05:29in the meantime. And so if you want to
- 1:05:31be impatient with the input, the input
- 1:05:33is the thing. That's the action you do.
- 1:05:35And so by delineating that, if you hear
- 1:05:39yourself thinking, man, why hasn't this
- 1:05:40happened yet? You're talking about
- 1:05:42outputs. And that means great, if I
- 1:05:44think that thought, I need to do more of
- 1:05:46this input, right? And so use your
- 1:05:48input, your action, your doingness, the
- 1:05:51thing you use your hands for as your
- 1:05:55coping mechanism for your impatience
- 1:05:59with outputs. I want to say that one
- 1:06:01more time. Whenever you have that
- 1:06:03feeling that things should be happening
- 1:06:04faster, use action as your coping
- 1:06:08mechanism. I used to write this down a
- 1:06:11lot uh and say it, which was action
- 1:06:14alleviates anxiety. And so when I would
- 1:06:16have this anxiety about the future of
- 1:06:18like why haven't I made it yet? Why are
- 1:06:20these other people doing better than me?
- 1:06:21Like is is this not going to work? What
- 1:06:24if I'm on the wrong path? Action
- 1:06:26alleviates anxiety. The only thing I
- 1:06:28could control with that I was is that I
- 1:06:29would work is that I would get better.
- 1:06:30And the key point there was that it
- 1:06:32wasn't just working for work's sake. It
- 1:06:34was working with the intention to
- 1:06:35improve. And so you want to do
- 1:06:38repetitions because by doing things more
- 1:06:40times you get better at them typically
- 1:06:42just by accident. But if you're
- 1:06:44deliberate about the point of doing
- 1:06:46this, when I started working at a gym,
- 1:06:48going from a white collar job, it wasn't
- 1:06:50because I wanted to become a trainer for
- 1:06:52the rest of my life. It was because I
- 1:06:53wanted to learn the skills.
- 1:06:56And then I knew that once I learned
- 1:06:57those skills, if I owned a gym, then I
- 1:06:59would know how to do the training part
- 1:07:01as well. And that would be good for me.
- 1:07:03And so then when I was a gym owner and
- 1:07:05when I started and started working at a
- 1:07:06gym, I wanted to own a big chain of
- 1:07:08gyms. That was my that was my whole goal
- 1:07:10to start with. I wasn't getting into
- 1:07:11this for one. Like I never had the goal
- 1:07:13of only owning just one gym. And so even
- 1:07:15when I started that gym, the whole point
- 1:07:17and I worked all the time because I
- 1:07:18thought of all the things that I didn't
- 1:07:19know how to do yet. And so it wasn't
- 1:07:22about great, I've made it. I own a gym.
- 1:07:24It was like I'm so deprived of where I
- 1:07:26want to be. I have I have to fill this
- 1:07:28gap as fast as I possibly can. And so
- 1:07:30that's why I spent so much time on this
- 1:07:32and got feedback from as many human
- 1:07:35beings as I possibly could who were
- 1:07:37ahead of me. So, I want to say this
- 1:07:39clearly. Once I started my gym one, I
- 1:07:42paid for a mastermind for gym owners
- 1:07:44before owning a gym. And I did that
- 1:07:46because I figured, well, why would I
- 1:07:48start a gym until I learn all the stuff
- 1:07:49that you guys did wrong? I was like,
- 1:07:51I'll just learn from all y'all's
- 1:07:52mistakes. It sounds like a great deal
- 1:07:54for me. It almost felt unfair. I was
- 1:07:56like, "Yeah, okay." He said, "Don't
- 1:07:58start at one of those locations." He
- 1:07:59said, "Have good storefront." He said,
- 1:08:00"Make sure that you have, you know, good
- 1:08:02parking." I was, "Oo, these are all
- 1:08:03good, you know, good things." They're
- 1:08:04like, "Don't go too big." I was like,
- 1:08:05"Okay, that's good." and they're like,
- 1:08:06"Make sure your rent's under this per
- 1:08:08foot." I was like, "All right, make sure
- 1:08:08I got that right." And so, I took all
- 1:08:10these notes in that I would have just
- 1:08:11made huge mistakes on the on the
- 1:08:13upfront. Now, once I did start my gym,
- 1:08:15what a lot of people don't know is that
- 1:08:17every weekend I would either be on phone
- 1:08:20calls or I'd be driving out to other gym
- 1:08:22owners and I would, and thankfully,
- 1:08:24because I was so young when I started my
- 1:08:25business, they were just like, they felt
- 1:08:27bad for me. And so, they would just sit
- 1:08:29there and I'd be like, "Hey, why do you
- 1:08:31do that? Hey, why do you do that? Hey,
- 1:08:32why do you do that?" And it was like,
- 1:08:34you know, they'd be like, "God, you're
- 1:08:36such a pain in the ass." [laughter]
- 1:08:38But I just wanted to learn, right? But I
- 1:08:39was always like willing to help them
- 1:08:40with anything they had. You know what I
- 1:08:41mean? I was like, "Let me show you the
- 1:08:42stuff that's working well for me." And I
- 1:08:43would always just share it. Um, and the
- 1:08:45thing is is I would go there and they
- 1:08:47would say they did something and I'd be
- 1:08:48like, "Huh, that's weird. That's
- 1:08:49different than the other guy." And I I
- 1:08:50like that way better. It didn't mean I'd
- 1:08:52take everything as as fact. But I got a
- 1:08:54lot of ideas from that. And then I would
- 1:08:55use them. And if they didn't work, I
- 1:08:57would just toss them out. And if they
- 1:08:58did, I kept it. And that's how I quickly
- 1:09:01iterated the gym model to become much
- 1:09:03better than a lot of people's models
- 1:09:05despite me being younger because I was
- 1:09:07able to leverage everyone else's
- 1:09:09experience as fast as I could and gym it
- 1:09:11into my own. And so I think like the
- 1:09:13people who move faster than life learn
- 1:09:15faster and the only way you learn is by
- 1:09:18changing your behavior with the same
- 1:09:20conditions. Which means that if a person
- 1:09:22walks in I say this is my six-point
- 1:09:24script. A person who's identical walks
- 1:09:26in right afterwards. If I've learned
- 1:09:28something, that script changes means
- 1:09:30same condition, new behavior. And so if
- 1:09:33you keep doing the exact same thing
- 1:09:35every single day, then you may not be
- 1:09:37learning. And this is a key point. It's
- 1:09:39good to work hard, but it's good to work
- 1:09:41hard and smart, which means that the
- 1:09:43work you do gets better because you
- 1:09:45tweak things. And so if you're not
- 1:09:47documenting the process that you have,
- 1:09:48and I'm not saying you're making content
- 1:09:50about it, but literally looking back at
- 1:09:51game footage, looking at the calls you
- 1:09:53did, looking at the content you did. I
- 1:09:55do this today. People ask me like, "What
- 1:09:57are the masterminds you're into? What
- 1:09:58are the courses you learn from?" I have
- 1:10:01now broken apart the learning process
- 1:10:04that I have that works best for me
- 1:10:05because I see the biggest gains and
- 1:10:07improvement haven't come from advice for
- 1:10:09me for the most part. They came from
- 1:10:10looking at data, which was, let me look
- 1:10:13at the last 2,000 ads I made. Let me
- 1:10:15look at the top 50. Let me look at what
- 1:10:17these ones have in common. Let me look
- 1:10:18at what they don't look like compared to
- 1:10:20the bottom 50. Okay, these ones have
- 1:10:22these characteristics. These don't. I'll
- 1:10:24do more of this and less of that. And
- 1:10:25then I do another hundred ads and I look
- 1:10:27at the top 10 again. I say, "What do
- 1:10:28these ones have that these ones don't?"
- 1:10:29And I do that for sales calls. I do that
- 1:10:31for content. I do that for meetings. I
- 1:10:32do that for for businesses in general
- 1:10:35when you start zooming out. And so that
- 1:10:38process of do a lot of volume. Then look
- 1:10:42at the outcomes that were good. Look at
- 1:10:44the activities that led to those
- 1:10:45outcomes that are positive. Do more of
- 1:10:48those activities. Look at the bottom
- 1:10:50percentages. Look at the things that led
- 1:10:52to not having that happen. and do less
- 1:10:54of those. And if you're younger, and
- 1:10:57this is specific for everyone who's
- 1:10:58listening to this video, if you're
- 1:10:59probably sub 30, sub 28 maybe, right? If
- 1:11:02you're in your 20s or less, you can
- 1:11:04probably get away with this, which is
- 1:11:06that people ahead of you are more
- 1:11:09willing, believe it or not, to feel like
- 1:11:11they have status. So, you can give them
- 1:11:14status by saying, "Be a mentor." And the
- 1:11:17thing is, a lot of young guys have a lot
- 1:11:18of ego, right? Because you're trying to
- 1:11:19prove yourself, trying to be a man,
- 1:11:20whatever. The thing is is that if you
- 1:11:23humble yourself, it's not like there's
- 1:11:25some [ __ ] massive scoreboard where
- 1:11:27it's like who humbled themselves to whom
- 1:11:29across the whole US. It doesn't it's not
- 1:11:31not exists. It's just it's within one
- 1:11:33dynamic, right? And so if you go and
- 1:11:35say, "Hey, I don't know anything. I'm
- 1:11:37happy to learn." If you do that, then a
- 1:11:39lot of people are like, "Oh, well, he
- 1:11:40humbled himself." Well, yeah, I'm happy
- 1:11:42to teach you. And the thing is is
- 1:11:43they'll give you advice that's worth
- 1:11:44thousands of dollars, years of your life
- 1:11:47for free if you just say, "You're better
- 1:11:49than I am at this." But the thing is is
- 1:11:51at the end of the day none of it matters
- 1:11:53but scoreboard would be the thing that
- 1:11:56matters in business right and so the
- 1:11:58only thing that precedes the scoreboard
- 1:12:01is your learning I've spent ego points
- 1:12:04I've spent dollars I've spent time I've
- 1:12:08spent social capital I spent every
- 1:12:10resource that I had to get more learning
- 1:12:13faster because fundamentally the only
- 1:12:16thing and I think this is probably one
- 1:12:17of the biggest gifts my father gave me
- 1:12:19is believing that I am the asset I am
- 1:12:22investing in. And the cool thing is is
- 1:12:24like you are the permanent hold, right?
- 1:12:27You can't sell you like you're you until
- 1:12:30you die. And so this is the one asset
- 1:12:32you've got because you compound. Skills
- 1:12:34compound. When you get really good at
- 1:12:36sales and really good at finance, guess
- 1:12:37what? You can raise a billion dollars
- 1:12:38because you know how the finance world
- 1:12:40works and you know how the sales world
- 1:12:42works, right? If you know how to you
- 1:12:43know how to code and market, then guess
- 1:12:46what? You can build software and sell it
- 1:12:47to gazillions of people because you have
- 1:12:48the product and the acquisition. Like
- 1:12:51skills stack disproportionately. If you
- 1:12:53only know one, you might not be able to
- 1:12:54make a tenth as much as if you know two.
- 1:12:57Now, obviously those are big bucketed
- 1:12:58terms that have many, many, many skills
- 1:12:59underneath of them. But fundamentally,
- 1:13:01when you think about it that way, you
- 1:13:02become a weapon. Real quick, I have a
- 1:13:04gift for you. This is the $100 million
- 1:13:06scaling road map. It's something that my
- 1:13:07team and I put 200 plus hours into
- 1:13:09building and breaking the stages of
- 1:13:11scaling into 10 steps. All right? All
- 1:13:13right. And so what we did is we broke
- 1:13:14down everything that got us basically
- 1:13:16got us stuck and what we did to break
- 1:13:17free at each level of the business. And
- 1:13:20if you'd like to know what product,
- 1:13:21marketing, sales, customer service, IT,
- 1:13:23recruiting, human uh resources, and
- 1:13:25finance look like at the stage that
- 1:13:27you're currently at, this is a free
- 1:13:29gift. So all you have to do is go to
- 1:13:30aquis.com/romap. You can plug in your
- 1:13:32business information. And if you want
- 1:13:33our help, you want my help to help you
- 1:13:36break through whatever level of scaling
- 1:13:37you're at. This is not a promise. I'm
- 1:13:38just saying we'd love to help. Um on the
- 1:13:40thank you page, you can book a call. Uh,
- 1:13:42every month we have a workshop out here
- 1:13:43at my headquarters. You actually talk to
- 1:13:45my real team that does does our
- 1:13:47marketing, does our emails, does our
- 1:13:48ads, does our copy, does our does our
- 1:13:50does our sales, does our finance, does
- 1:13:52our recruiting, the real people are
- 1:13:53doing this at a very high level. And
- 1:13:55what's really cool about that is that
- 1:13:56they can typically find and spot what
- 1:13:58the constraints are in a business like
- 1:13:59that. And so it's one of the most
- 1:14:01valuable things that I could possibly
- 1:14:02do. Obviously, you know, space is
- 1:14:03limited based on our actual
- 1:14:04headquarters. Um, but if that's
- 1:14:05interesting on the thank you page, you
- 1:14:06can book a call. No pressure. This is a
- 1:14:08gift either way. It's absolutely free.
- 1:14:09So, let's tackle the second part. I said
- 1:14:11you can solve a lot of male problems by
- 1:14:13getting in shape and making money. And
- 1:14:15so let's talk about the getting in shape
- 1:14:17side. So you can avoid tons of problems
- 1:14:21in life by doing one thing, going to bed
- 1:14:24on time. And so instead of setting
- 1:14:27alarms to wake up, set alarms to go to
- 1:14:29sleep on time. It's hard to wake up late
- 1:14:31when you go to bed at 9, right? And so
- 1:14:33the thing is is that that one simple
- 1:14:35behavior actually can eliminate a lot of
- 1:14:37the things that derail men, especially
- 1:14:39young men. And so Charlie Mer talks
- 1:14:41about this a lot, which is like all I'd
- 1:14:43want to do is find out where I'm going
- 1:14:44to die and never go there. The whole
- 1:14:47point is he thought so much more about
- 1:14:50avoiding stupidity than trying to be
- 1:14:52intelligent. It's kind of like the
- 1:14:53stupidities are very easy to identify.
- 1:14:55The intelligence is hard, but if you
- 1:14:57avoid all stupidity, you just become
- 1:14:59intelligent by default. And so if you
- 1:15:02define intelligence the way I do, which
- 1:15:03is rate of learning, so how quickly you
- 1:15:05pick things up, that is intelligence. If
- 1:15:07you can avoid all of these things that
- 1:15:10make you look like an idiot, [laughter]
- 1:15:12right? Then you become more intelligent.
- 1:15:14And so let's let's talk about this from
- 1:15:16the from the the getting in shape
- 1:15:17perspective. Show [snorts] me a
- 1:15:19situation where you have two groups of
- 1:15:21men. One group of men that is really out
- 1:15:23of shape and fat and another group of
- 1:15:25men that's really in shape that are
- 1:15:27going to outperform one another. And
- 1:15:30this is generalized. You have to take
- 1:15:31random sampling of the population. A
- 1:15:32bunch of inshaped guys, a bunch of
- 1:15:34overweight guys. Who's going to do
- 1:15:36better at any task over and over again?
- 1:15:37If we pick 10 tasks that are completely
- 1:15:39different, the inshaped guys are going
- 1:15:41to do better than the out of shape guys.
- 1:15:42Period. They're going to have more
- 1:15:43energy. They're going to be more
- 1:15:44focused. If it's anything interrelated,
- 1:15:46like inter relations based, like those
- 1:15:48guys are going to close higher
- 1:15:49percentages. If you're better looking,
- 1:15:51you will close more. If you're better
- 1:15:53looking, you get paid more. If you're
- 1:15:55better looking, you get more promoted.
- 1:15:57If you're better looking, you do better
- 1:15:59in content. Period. Fight me. And so the
- 1:16:03thing is is like if you have this one
- 1:16:05thing that affects every way that people
- 1:16:07see you and the only thing you have to
- 1:16:09do is control what you put into your
- 1:16:11mouth, then don't you think it's worth
- 1:16:13developing that most basic skill of
- 1:16:15discipline at this point in your life?
- 1:16:17Because the thing is is that you want to
- 1:16:19get in shape young because if you're not
- 1:16:21in shape, guess whose fault that is?
- 1:16:25So get in shape now. Thing is is it
- 1:16:28costs time, not money. And right now
- 1:16:31you've got time and not money. And time
- 1:16:34only becomes more expensive as you age.
- 1:16:38So buy it now while time cost you the
- 1:16:40least and you have the fewest
- 1:16:42responsibilities. It'll help you no
- 1:16:44matter what life path you choose. The
- 1:16:46thing that no one recognizes is that
- 1:16:48drinking cost you two days. The day you
- 1:16:50drink and the day you recover. and
- 1:16:51sometimes the weeks afterwards for the
- 1:16:53stupid thing you did while you were
- 1:16:54drunk that everyone else saw. It reminds
- 1:16:56me of this quote from Muhammad Ali and I
- 1:16:59asked my team to pull it up cuz I think
- 1:17:00it's so good also cuz he was the
- 1:17:01greatest of all time and just a cool
- 1:17:03dude.
- 1:17:03>> What's the the central part of your
- 1:17:05training? Is it running? Is it sparring
- 1:17:07or
- 1:17:08>> central part is [music]
- 1:17:10dodging the nightclubs and the parties
- 1:17:12and the girls?
- 1:17:15>> You want the truth? and being in the bed
- 1:17:18by yourself 9:00 at night.
- 1:17:22>> And [music] if you can get by that,
- 1:17:23you'll make it.
- 1:17:26>> That's the truth. Now, I tell you the
- 1:17:27truth. You talk all that running and
- 1:17:29[music] hitting the bags and jogging and
- 1:17:30biting them. You won't
- 1:17:32>> dodging ladies is the main thing.
- 1:17:35>> Especially when you're pretty like me.
- 1:17:37>> And I'll speak to myself personally.
- 1:17:39When I had my intense periods of work, I
- 1:17:43would take off for a long, long time. So
- 1:17:46the longest I took off was two years
- 1:17:48while I was scaling gym launch from, you
- 1:17:50know, the 20 months we went from zero to
- 1:17:514 and a.5 million a month, 4.4 to be
- 1:17:54technical. I didn't drink that whole
- 1:17:55period. And once things settled out, I
- 1:17:57was like, "All right, I'm willing to
- 1:17:58drink again." And right now,
- 1:18:00Acquisition.com is scaling like crazy.
- 1:18:02And so Leila and I both said, "Let's
- 1:18:04just stop drinking for the foreseeable."
- 1:18:06And same thing now. So that was when I
- 1:18:08was in my 20s. This is now when I'm in
- 1:18:10my 30s. And I'll probably continue this
- 1:18:12until I feel like I'm at a place where
- 1:18:14things feel chill again. and then like
- 1:18:15maybe I'll I'll partake again. But the
- 1:18:17thing is is like if you're hungry, argue
- 1:18:19me the opposite, which is me drinking
- 1:18:22more will make it more likely for me to
- 1:18:23hit my goals. I think you'd have a tough
- 1:18:25time making that argument. And so right
- 1:18:27now everything's compounding is
- 1:18:29amplified, right? The stuff you do now
- 1:18:31amplifies throughout your career and
- 1:18:32your life. And so I would want to stack
- 1:18:36as many advantages as I can to my
- 1:18:38favorite, which is like I'm going to go
- 1:18:40to sleep on time. I'm going to not
- 1:18:42drink, right? I'm going to get in shape,
- 1:18:46right? I'm going to do as many
- 1:18:47repetitions as I can. I'm going to
- 1:18:48humble myself with people who are more
- 1:18:50experienced than I am. Even if I think
- 1:18:51I'm smarter than them, they still know
- 1:18:54more. And there's a big difference, and
- 1:18:55this is what I think is really tough for
- 1:18:57younger guys, is that your brain at 25
- 1:19:00to, you know, like 25ish, 25 to 30 is
- 1:19:03like peak processing power. But I'm way
- 1:19:07[ __ ] smarter now than I was then
- 1:19:09because I've still learned more. And
- 1:19:11that's the thing is is that you may be
- 1:19:13smarter than someone in sheer processing
- 1:19:15power, but they still might know more
- 1:19:17than you. And so you can't live their
- 1:19:20life. And especially if somebody is
- 1:19:21further ahead, then they it still means
- 1:19:23that they have knowledge that you don't.
- 1:19:26And so listen and humbling yourself to
- 1:19:29somebody even if you think you are
- 1:19:31smarter will teach you more because
- 1:19:33again argue the opposite. I will learn
- 1:19:36nothing from no one. How does that help
- 1:19:39you? It helps you your ego feel good,
- 1:19:42but at some point your ego is going to
- 1:19:43have to rectify its good feeling with
- 1:19:45reality, which is that you're broke as
- 1:19:46[ __ ] and no one cares. And so, I would
- 1:19:49rather humble myself rather than have
- 1:19:52the world humble me. This is a Bible
- 1:19:54quote that I just really like a lot.
- 1:19:55It's Matthew 23:12. He said, "Those who
- 1:19:56are humble will be exalted, and whoever
- 1:19:59exalts himself will be humbled." I
- 1:20:00actually told that to one of our our
- 1:20:02team the other day because I felt like
- 1:20:03his ego was getting a little bit bigger
- 1:20:05than it probably should have been. And I
- 1:20:06said, "Listen, man." I was like, "If you
- 1:20:08want to get humbled, keep doing what
- 1:20:09you're doing." I was like, "But if you
- 1:20:11want people to talk you up," I was like,
- 1:20:13"Humble yourself. Let your work work for
- 1:20:16you and then everyone else will exalt
- 1:20:19you." And so, I think most men want to
- 1:20:21be respected. They don't have respect.
- 1:20:23And so, they compensate by exalting
- 1:20:25themselves because it makes them feel
- 1:20:26better in the short term, but you look
- 1:20:27like an idiot in the long term. And
- 1:20:29think about it like this. Like, for some
- 1:20:30reason, I don't know why we're wired
- 1:20:31this way, but we say nice things about
- 1:20:33ourselves and we feel good, but everyone
- 1:20:34else feels bad, right? If everyone else
- 1:20:38says nice things about you, it doesn't
- 1:20:39make them feel bad to say it, but it
- 1:20:40makes you feel good. Think about those
- 1:20:42people in your life who always like talk
- 1:20:44themselves up. It's like, what do you
- 1:20:46see? You're like, "This guy's so
- 1:20:47insecure. It's obvious." And you look
- 1:20:49that way. You don't feel that way, but
- 1:20:51you look that way. And some of the
- 1:20:52things that you develop as you get older
- 1:20:54is the separation between how I look and
- 1:20:56how I feel, which is like, "Oh, even
- 1:20:58though this feels good, I look dumb
- 1:21:00doing this." Your feelings can lie to
- 1:21:02you in terms of how well this behavior
- 1:21:05is serving you with your goals in the
- 1:21:07long term. And while we're talking about
- 1:21:09your friends exalting you and your
- 1:21:10friends saying you're cool, how much do
- 1:21:13their opinions of you really matter? Cuz
- 1:21:15now this is going to take a completely
- 1:21:16different direction than you expected,
- 1:21:17which is you being humble is a
- 1:21:20description that other people would give
- 1:21:21to you. But it relies on you caring a
- 1:21:24lot of what they think, which is a
- 1:21:25double-edged sword. And the younger you
- 1:21:27are, actually at all points, it hurts
- 1:21:29you. It's kind of like the stock market.
- 1:21:31One person, two person. One day or two
- 1:21:33days in the stock market, it's just
- 1:21:35about sentiment. But how big the stock
- 1:21:37goes over a decade is about how good the
- 1:21:40intrinsic stock is. And so if a few
- 1:21:43people say you're an [ __ ] no big
- 1:21:45deal. If everyone says you're an
- 1:21:46[ __ ] probably a problem, right? And
- 1:21:48so it's understanding the nuance between
- 1:21:50that. But your friend group has a
- 1:21:52disproportionate sway over your
- 1:21:54behavior. And so your reference group is
- 1:21:57one of the number one correlations with
- 1:21:59how big your life gets or rather the
- 1:22:03goals you achieve. Now they've done the
- 1:22:04studies in terms of finance because it's
- 1:22:06easy to quantify but your reference
- 1:22:07group the five people you compare
- 1:22:09yourself to not necessarily spend the
- 1:22:11most time with but compare yourself to
- 1:22:13are the ones that determine your future.
- 1:22:17And so sometimes you have to like your
- 1:22:20goals more than you like your friends.
- 1:22:23And every person who wants to do
- 1:22:25something in their life or has done
- 1:22:27something with their lives is going
- 1:22:28through the exact same chapter that
- 1:22:30you're going through right now. And it's
- 1:22:32the lonely chapter. It's the chapter
- 1:22:34where you don't fit in with your old
- 1:22:35friends, but you don't have the
- 1:22:37achievements yet to fit in with a new
- 1:22:39group of friends. And you're doing all
- 1:22:40the stuff, right? The fruit tutorials.
- 1:22:42You're watching these videos and you're
- 1:22:43reading everything you can get your
- 1:22:44hands on. And you're trying to set up
- 1:22:46whatever your podcast is or your content
- 1:22:48thing, right? And you're going through
- 1:22:50it and you're thinking to yourself like,
- 1:22:51"Is this even worth it?" because you're
- 1:22:52not seeing any signs of success. But the
- 1:22:54sign of success is the hate that you get
- 1:22:56along the way. It is the leading
- 1:22:58indicator. And what you can't do is bend
- 1:23:01the knee to their hate and try and fit
- 1:23:03back in and conform because it's
- 1:23:05comfortable and it's warm. It's like the
- 1:23:08scene in the Matrix when Trinity opens
- 1:23:09the door, the very beginning in the
- 1:23:11first Matrix when Neo is about to take
- 1:23:13the red pill and he wants to get out of
- 1:23:15the car and Trinity says, "You've been
- 1:23:17down that road, Neo. you know that road
- 1:23:19and you know exactly where it ends and I
- 1:23:22know that's not where you want to be.
- 1:23:24And then he closes the door and he gets
- 1:23:26back in and he goes they they go to go
- 1:23:28take the red pill. So right now this
- 1:23:30moment that you're going through is
- 1:23:31Trinity opening the door and saying you
- 1:23:34could go back. You could go party. You
- 1:23:36could go to the nightclubs. You could
- 1:23:38say that this was just a hobby. You
- 1:23:39could downplay what you're doing like
- 1:23:40I'm just trying it out. Oh yeah. I'm not
- 1:23:42I'm not really that into it. It's just
- 1:23:43like just something I found. Right. But
- 1:23:46then as you're saying, you feel like a
- 1:23:48fake because you're lying to yourself.
- 1:23:50You're lying to them about what you what
- 1:23:52your real intentions are. And in that
- 1:23:54moment when you're trying to think about
- 1:23:56having that conversation, you'll
- 1:23:57remember exactly why you left, why it is
- 1:23:59that road. And you know exactly where it
- 1:24:01ends. And that's not where you want to
- 1:24:02be. And the thing is is that your goals
- 1:24:06will stick with you longer than these
- 1:24:08relationships. Your goals will serve you
- 1:24:11more than these relationships. And this
- 1:24:13is what this is the stuff that no one
- 1:24:14will tell you. I can tell you
- 1:24:16personally, I don't talk to I talked to
- 1:24:18one friend that I have from middle
- 1:24:20school and high school. All right? I
- 1:24:22talk to one person, two people from
- 1:24:27college. And it's not like we talk all
- 1:24:29the time. I talk to him every six months
- 1:24:30or so. And so I say this because
- 1:24:32although these relationships feel like
- 1:24:34they're incredibly important in your
- 1:24:36life right now, they will disappear. The
- 1:24:38majority of these of these friendships
- 1:24:40are based on convenience. you're only
- 1:24:42friends with them because they lived in
- 1:24:43your dorm, they lived in your
- 1:24:44neighborhood, they went in to English
- 1:24:45class with you. But as soon as your
- 1:24:47conditions change, you change where
- 1:24:49you're at. All many of them will fade
- 1:24:51away because you'll develop new skills.
- 1:24:54You'll develop new context. You'll meet
- 1:24:55new people who are upskilled from them.
- 1:24:58And then you'll compare them to compare
- 1:25:00to these people and you'll be like,
- 1:25:01"Man, these are better friends. These
- 1:25:02are people who are more aligned with my
- 1:25:04goals. They're trying to grow. When I
- 1:25:05want to work all day Saturday, they're
- 1:25:07like, cool, I'll work with you." Rather
- 1:25:08than being like, "Dude, we're going on a
- 1:25:10pontoon boat. like where are you going
- 1:25:11to be? And you have to accept that as
- 1:25:15the price. And the thing is is like it's
- 1:25:17only if you want that like if you if you
- 1:25:20want to live a life that is the same as
- 1:25:23everyone else's then you can do what
- 1:25:24everyone else does. The only issue is
- 1:25:26when you want to do what everyone else
- 1:25:29does but get what none of them have. If
- 1:25:31you want to be exceptional by definition
- 1:25:34you will be the exception. You will not
- 1:25:36be normal. You will be unlike the
- 1:25:38others. And so it makes sense that you
- 1:25:41would be in the out groupoup. And it
- 1:25:43hurts as a human being because you want
- 1:25:45to be in the in-group. It's part of our
- 1:25:46DNA. Shame is a real thing. And we don't
- 1:25:49want to feel that because in in the real
- 1:25:51in the in the n natural world, if you're
- 1:25:53outside of the group, you have a much
- 1:25:55lower likelihood of living and
- 1:25:56procreating. So it's strong in our DNA
- 1:25:59to be in group. But the thing is is that
- 1:26:02you're actually not in group or out of
- 1:26:04group. You're transitioning. You're
- 1:26:06between groups. And so in that lonely
- 1:26:09chapter, that's where you can do a
- 1:26:11disproportionate amount of work because
- 1:26:13you have no distractions. So you listen
- 1:26:14to the podcast, you read the tweets, you
- 1:26:16watch the videos, you consume the
- 1:26:17content because you know deep down, I
- 1:26:19can do more than this. And you begin to
- 1:26:22see the person that you could be and
- 1:26:24realize how far you need to go to get
- 1:26:26there. But despite how far away it
- 1:26:28seems, your goals, the best version of
- 1:26:30you, you look back down the dead end
- 1:26:32road and you know that's not where you
- 1:26:33want to be. And so you keep going and
- 1:26:35realize that there's no turning back.
- 1:26:37Once you see the promised land, once you
- 1:26:39see what you could become, you can't go
- 1:26:41back. And if you're not sure who your
- 1:26:43real friends are, one, ask, is it more
- 1:26:46likely or less likely that I hit my
- 1:26:48goals with this person in my life? Just
- 1:26:50think about it. Like, if this person
- 1:26:51isn't in my life, is it more likely my
- 1:26:52goals? Then remove them. Because it's
- 1:26:54better to have friends who force you to
- 1:26:56grow than ones who accept you as you
- 1:26:58are. Because the biggest risk to your
- 1:26:59future isn't your future competition or
- 1:27:01your rivals. It's the distraction that
- 1:27:03you insist on keeping in your life
- 1:27:06rather than doing the things you know
- 1:27:08you should be doing but aren't. Think
- 1:27:09about it like this. Imagine a competitor
- 1:27:12that you'd never want to go against.
- 1:27:14Focused, persistent, always learning,
- 1:27:16always improving, relentless, says no to
- 1:27:19everything but that which makes them
- 1:27:21stronger. You know what he looks like.
- 1:27:23You know how he acts. You know who he
- 1:27:24associates with. Great.
- 1:27:28That's future you. Now become him. You
- 1:27:30have to kill your current self for your
- 1:27:33new self to have room to grow. And so
- 1:27:35it's this constant appraisal of your
- 1:27:37skills and activities and saying which
- 1:27:40of these makes me stronger? Which of
- 1:27:42these makes it more likely for me to hit
- 1:27:44my goal? And I just want to give you
- 1:27:46that frame because that like that single
- 1:27:47frame of is this person being in my life
- 1:27:50make it more likely or less likely to
- 1:27:51hit my goal? Is this activity or this
- 1:27:53behavior that I do make it more or less
- 1:27:55likely to hit my goal? And I
- 1:27:56consistently just ask that question over
- 1:27:58and over and over again. And that is
- 1:28:00because for me, I do love my goals more
- 1:28:02than I love my friend because my goals
- 1:28:04will be with me long after they are. And
- 1:28:07so if you think about your relationship
- 1:28:09with your goals and you put it on the
- 1:28:11same pedestal or higher than your
- 1:28:13relationship with your friends, you're
- 1:28:15going to lose one of the relationships.
- 1:28:17And the question is which one is the one
- 1:28:19that's going to serve you more in the
- 1:28:20long term? That's a decision for you.
- 1:28:22But for me, I can tell you personally,
- 1:28:23achieving my goals has served me more
- 1:28:25than any one person has. And because
- 1:28:28achieving your goals is a generalized
- 1:28:30thing, it can open all doors to new
- 1:28:32relationships. And so you do have to
- 1:28:35burn sometimes what you have in order to
- 1:28:36have what you want. If you want to
- 1:28:38impress poor people, outspend them. If
- 1:28:41you want to impress rich people, outwork
- 1:28:44them. And I can tell you this being in
- 1:28:46the position that I'm at because I have
- 1:28:48tons of young men who work for me and I
- 1:28:50mean they hear all the content that I
- 1:28:52make and they know that. And so if you
- 1:28:54lease a Ferrari for $5,000 a month or
- 1:28:56whatever, I know you're not rich. And
- 1:29:00every rich person isn't impressed by
- 1:29:02that because we know what it costs. You
- 1:29:04only impress poor people. And if you do
- 1:29:06it really early in your career, every
- 1:29:08rich person's like, "Man, you should be
- 1:29:09reinvesting that to get way [ __ ]
- 1:29:10bigger." Now, if you're like an
- 1:29:12afficionado and you want to have lots of
- 1:29:13cars, and that's like, again, that's
- 1:29:14different. It depends on the reason
- 1:29:15you're doing it. It's like you shouldn't
- 1:29:17be cooking your own food unless you love
- 1:29:19cooking. But if you don't love cooking,
- 1:29:21then you should outsource that [ __ ] as
- 1:29:22fast as possible so that you can get
- 1:29:23your time back. It's understanding the
- 1:29:24context of this, which of course this
- 1:29:26will be taken out of context. But
- 1:29:27hopefully you watching or listening to
- 1:29:30this can at least get it. Leila and I
- 1:29:32both collectively started buying nicer
- 1:29:34things. So living in nicer places,
- 1:29:36having nicer cars, I bought my home,
- 1:29:38which was a nice house in Austin. I
- 1:29:40think it cost me 1.7 million. I bought
- 1:29:42it in cash and I bought it off one
- 1:29:44month's paycheck. And so I want to put
- 1:29:46that in context to like was it a ball
- 1:29:48and house? Totally. It was sick. I was
- 1:29:50super happy to be there. But where I
- 1:29:53lived before that cost me 1,200 bucks a
- 1:29:55month. And so you're like, wait, 1.6,
- 1:29:57right? We spend money, but by
- 1:29:59percentage, the amount of money we spend
- 1:30:01is inconsequential. If you want to buy
- 1:30:03the toys and you want to buy that stuff,
- 1:30:05I would say sure, understand one,
- 1:30:07whatever you spend, you're taking away
- 1:30:08from the future. Now, there is always a
- 1:30:10point you have to balance between
- 1:30:11consumption and investment. If you never
- 1:30:13spend anything, you live you live your
- 1:30:14entire life and you end up with a big
- 1:30:15pile of money and you didn't enjoy any
- 1:30:18moment of that. I don't think that's the
- 1:30:19way to do it. But I do think there's a
- 1:30:21ratio there and I think that ratio
- 1:30:22depends on you as an individual. I tend
- 1:30:24to always overindex on investment
- 1:30:25because I just I want to become a really
- 1:30:27like great version of me and I think
- 1:30:30that's going to cost money and it's
- 1:30:31going to cost time and I like to be
- 1:30:33ready for those opportunities because
- 1:30:34the opportunities get bigger and have
- 1:30:35more zeros next to them and there's no
- 1:30:37masterminds you get to at a certain
- 1:30:39level. you just do a deal with someone
- 1:30:40and if for me to pony up for the deal
- 1:30:41might be like, "Hey, you got to write a
- 1:30:42check for 10 million." I'm like, "All
- 1:30:43right, I got to have that ready for just
- 1:30:46like on the sidelines waiting for
- 1:30:47opportunities, right?" And so the idea
- 1:30:51is being on the defensive so that you
- 1:30:54can be on the offensive. It's living far
- 1:30:56below your lifestyle so that you can
- 1:30:58more heavily invest in the growth of the
- 1:30:59business. And so your lifestyle is your
- 1:31:02competitor's opportunity. There's you
- 1:31:04and other version of you. There's
- 1:31:05bizarro you, right? And Bizaru wants to
- 1:31:08live this great lifestyle and has the
- 1:31:09Ferrari and the nicer place and
- 1:31:11whatever. But when an opportunity comes
- 1:31:12along, Bizarro doesn't have any savings
- 1:31:15because he's trying to to show face,
- 1:31:17right? But the thing is is that
- 1:31:18everybody who's trying to show face for
- 1:31:20hates him anyways cuz it looks like he's
- 1:31:21bragging. But also, they know how much
- 1:31:24he makes relatively and they're like,
- 1:31:25"God, he's got to be spending his whole
- 1:31:26paycheck. He looks irresponsible."
- 1:31:28There's zero advantage to being
- 1:31:31accurately judged. If you are strong,
- 1:31:33you want to appear weak. You want to
- 1:31:35have more money than people expect you
- 1:31:37to have. And so for me, when we did buy
- 1:31:40the Bentley, which I bought because I
- 1:31:42got, I'll be honest, I got pressured
- 1:31:44into it. They're like, "Dude, come on.
- 1:31:45You make all this money. Like, buy
- 1:31:47something nice for yourself." And I was
- 1:31:48like, "I guess people buy nice cars."
- 1:31:49So, I bought a car. I bought a Bentley.
- 1:31:51And um I returned it 6 months later. Uh
- 1:31:54and I lost 20 grand on it. And I was
- 1:31:55like, "This was just a complete waste of
- 1:31:57everything." Like, I just don't care at
- 1:31:59all about this because you only need
- 1:32:00three things to win. You can write this
- 1:32:02down. the balls to start, the brains to
- 1:32:05learn, and the heart to never quit. And
- 1:32:07the good news is you already have all
- 1:32:09three. You're just not using them.
- 1:32:10Because fundamentally, if you found
- 1:32:12somebody and they started and they
- 1:32:13continued to get better and they never
- 1:32:15stopped, they would win. Just think
- 1:32:16about it from fundamental basics. Like
- 1:32:17if I said, okay, think of a person who
- 1:32:20only did one thing and all they
- 1:32:22dedicated their entire life to is doing
- 1:32:23that one thing and getting better and
- 1:32:25better at that thing and they did it for
- 1:32:2650 years. Do you think that person would
- 1:32:28not be incredibly successful? Of course
- 1:32:30they would be. then why aren't you doing
- 1:32:32it? The problem is it's never been
- 1:32:34easier to start a business. It's also
- 1:32:37never been easier to do nothing at all.
- 1:32:39And this is what I mean by your
- 1:32:40distractions are the things that are
- 1:32:42getting in your way, preventing you from
- 1:32:44doing the things you already know you
- 1:32:45should be doing but aren't. Right now,
- 1:32:46if I were to say, "Hey, go get in shape.
- 1:32:48What do you need to do?" What you want
- 1:32:49to say is, "I'm going to go do some
- 1:32:50research to find the best program and to
- 1:32:52find the best diet." But if I just said,
- 1:32:53"No, no, no. You can't look." Make a
- 1:32:55guess. What would you say? You're
- 1:32:56probably like, "Well, I need probably
- 1:32:57like go to the gym, probably do some
- 1:32:58weights, probably do some cardio, move a
- 1:33:00little bit." Or would I say, "Do you
- 1:33:01want to stay at the same weight? Do you
- 1:33:03want to stay at the same cardio pace or
- 1:33:04do you want to move those up over time?"
- 1:33:05You probably say, "I want to move those
- 1:33:06up over time." Like, okay. And then
- 1:33:08food-wise, like, do you want to probably
- 1:33:09eat more protein and eat like [ __ ] You
- 1:33:11probably be like, "Yeah." Like, well,
- 1:33:12why don't we just start there? Most of
- 1:33:14the things you need to do, you already
- 1:33:16know what to do, and you delay doing
- 1:33:17them by under the guise of having a
- 1:33:19better plan. But the reality is that
- 1:33:21your plan is always going to change as
- 1:33:22soon as you get new information. And so
- 1:33:24the point is to start period and learn.
- 1:33:27And it's giving yourself permission to
- 1:33:29have the humility to start a role that
- 1:33:32you know is not going to be your endgame
- 1:33:34because you just see it as one tile on
- 1:33:36the painting that's going to become the
- 1:33:38version of you that you want. It's like
- 1:33:39I got to start at this corner. I'm going
- 1:33:41to paint this corner up because I know
- 1:33:42that this cornerstone of experience in
- 1:33:45doortodoor or cold calling or media
- 1:33:49buying, whatever, is going to be
- 1:33:51something that I can build my whole
- 1:33:52career off of. There are maybe trillions
- 1:33:55of dollars, but at least hundreds of
- 1:33:57billions of dollars that are being made
- 1:33:59and dedicated every day to getting you
- 1:34:00to do nothing. It's not a fair fight. I
- 1:34:02want to be clear. It's not a fair fight.
- 1:34:04And they're winning. And so, I love this
- 1:34:06from from Andy Fcell. said personal
- 1:34:09excellence is the ultimate rebellion.
- 1:34:11And so I think like you want to be a
- 1:34:13[ __ ] rebel, be excellent and do it
- 1:34:15for you. Like you want to stick it to
- 1:34:17the man now, just be great.
- 1:34:19Fundamentally, the point of
- 1:34:20entertainment is to get someone to pay
- 1:34:22attention to it. That's all
- 1:34:24entertainment does is pay attention to
- 1:34:25me, right? And so that means that you're
- 1:34:29not paying attention to the thing that
- 1:34:31matters more to you in the long term.
- 1:34:33And so every dollar, every minute of
- 1:34:35attention you pay to entertainment,
- 1:34:37whether that's porn, alcohol, going out
- 1:34:39to clubs, uh, all of social media in
- 1:34:41general, motivation, porn, if you will,
- 1:34:44all of that is you not doing what you
- 1:34:48need to do to get to where you want to
- 1:34:49go. You just have to be able to do
- 1:34:50things without seeing an immediate
- 1:34:52reward. Like, if there's one meta skill
- 1:34:54that that overshadows all of this, it's
- 1:34:57your ability to delay gratification. Is
- 1:34:59to delay a moment of reward. That's it.
- 1:35:02Like that's all you have to do. And in
- 1:35:04the beginning, you just have to be able
- 1:35:04to do it long enough that you get one
- 1:35:06reward. And that reward is typically
- 1:35:07outsized in its strength. And then that
- 1:35:09will reinforce you sticking with it.
- 1:35:11Because the people who do work really
- 1:35:12really hard, it's not like they're made
- 1:35:13of different flesh and blood than you.
- 1:35:14It just means that they had a short
- 1:35:15period at some point where they said,
- 1:35:16"I'm going to shut everything else off
- 1:35:17and I'm going to go all in on this." And
- 1:35:19then when they do get that first
- 1:35:20feedback loop like, "Holy [ __ ] I made
- 1:35:21my first sale. Holy [ __ ] I I got my
- 1:35:23first lead from from ads. Holy [ __ ] I
- 1:35:25got my first, you know, 100 followers."
- 1:35:27Whatever. It doesn't matter. like you
- 1:35:28have some feedback loop for whatever it
- 1:35:30is that you're trying to go after that
- 1:35:32then encourages you to do more and
- 1:35:34you're like, "Oh, this could work." And
- 1:35:35then as soon as that turns on, you can
- 1:35:36get obsessed with it. If I had you sign
- 1:35:38a contract right now to be that you the
- 1:35:40guaranteed that you'd be a millionaire
- 1:35:42in 10 years, but you couldn't make any
- 1:35:44real money between now and then, would
- 1:35:45you sign it? Every person I've asked
- 1:35:47says yes. And so maybe if you are
- 1:35:50listening to this and you're nodding
- 1:35:51your head like, "Okay, if I'm 30, I'm a
- 1:35:52millionaire." Yeah, it sounds like a
- 1:35:53great deal. By the way, that's like 0
- 1:35:55whatever 1%. Like no one is. But if
- 1:35:57that's you, a lot of stuff takes much
- 1:36:00longer. And the problem is that when
- 1:36:01you're 20, you've only been an adult for
- 1:36:03like 3 seconds. And so the thing is that
- 1:36:043 seconds feels like a very long time.
- 1:36:06But I have this belief that older people
- 1:36:10are more patient, not because they're
- 1:36:13actually more patient. It's just because
- 1:36:15your perception of time speeds up. I can
- 1:36:17be more patient than a 5-year-old
- 1:36:19because for me, one year is not 20% of
- 1:36:22my life. So my perception of time
- 1:36:24shrinks. I might have the same patience
- 1:36:26as a 5-year-old. It's just that more
- 1:36:28time passes. And so, if you are younger,
- 1:36:31then you have to just understand that
- 1:36:33your perception of time will speed up.
- 1:36:34And so, you will be able to exhibit
- 1:36:38patience. You'll keep being able to do
- 1:36:39something else in the meantime because
- 1:36:41the meantime will pass faster. And so,
- 1:36:44you have to overindex on it when you're
- 1:36:46starting. I mean, I've got guys on my
- 1:36:47team who are like, "Hey, what's my next
- 1:36:49career move?" And they're like 30 days
- 1:36:50into their job. And I'm like,
- 1:36:53"Give it a second." like you still suck.
- 1:36:57>> Like you went from suck to proficient,
- 1:36:59like you're not great yet. Calm down.
- 1:37:00The real world is very different from
- 1:37:01school, which you've already, if you're
- 1:37:03watching my stuff, you already kind of
- 1:37:04have an idea about that. But I want to
- 1:37:05give you the more of the behavioral
- 1:37:06definition around it is that with
- 1:37:08school, you have very clear directions
- 1:37:09and a clear outcome with a clear
- 1:37:11timeline and you get a grade
- 1:37:12immediately. So that's kind of like the
- 1:37:13reward or feedback loop, right? And
- 1:37:14sometimes it's pop quiz, same day, next
- 1:37:16day, you get the the feedback loop. Or
- 1:37:17even you get you finish the quiz, you go
- 1:37:19outside and you're like, "Hey, would you
- 1:37:20answer for six?" And you're like, "Ah,
- 1:37:21[ __ ] I got it wrong." Or whatever,
- 1:37:22right? But the thing is is the world is
- 1:37:24completely opposite of that. And so the
- 1:37:25re the thing is that beginners are
- 1:37:26paralyzed to make a decision because
- 1:37:28they assume the real world works like
- 1:37:30school and only has one right answer.
- 1:37:32But reality is is that there are many
- 1:37:35right answers with only one wrong answer
- 1:37:37which is doing nothing. And that's the
- 1:37:39answer that most people pick. So I was
- 1:37:41talking to Neil Patel who's a friend of
- 1:37:42mine and he just made this uh this big
- 1:37:44tweet about this but he and I had had a
- 1:37:45conversation about it earlier. He has
- 1:37:46two friends. One who's a public uh CEO,
- 1:37:50found a company, took it public. He's
- 1:37:52got another friend who found a company,
- 1:37:53took it public, took it back private,
- 1:37:54and then now only does private deals.
- 1:37:56The guy who does public and made all his
- 1:37:58money public is like, you got to go
- 1:38:00public. And the other guy who took his
- 1:38:02company public and it was a big mess and
- 1:38:04then took it private again is actually
- 1:38:05richer than the guy who made his company
- 1:38:07public. Both those guys are billionaires
- 1:38:09and both gave advice and they had
- 1:38:11differing advice. And so I don't see it
- 1:38:13as one is right or wrong. It's that
- 1:38:15there are many right paths, but only one
- 1:38:18thing will prevent you from achieving
- 1:38:20all of it, which is the only thing I'm
- 1:38:21trying to conquer in this video is
- 1:38:23getting you to not do the one wrong
- 1:38:24path, which is fear. Fear of not making
- 1:38:28it work. Fear of of other people's
- 1:38:30disapproval who don't matter anyways.
- 1:38:33That you aren't cool anymore or because
- 1:38:36you don't show up to social events or
- 1:38:38because you don't blow money on stuff
- 1:38:39that doesn't matter anymore or you're
- 1:38:41not wearing the brands that they think
- 1:38:42are cool. Is all of that worth you for
- 1:38:45the rest of your life having the
- 1:38:47crushing feeling of mediocrity knowing
- 1:38:49you could do more? And I say, and I can
- 1:38:52describe this because I've lived it.
- 1:38:54It's why I say it. I'm not saying that
- 1:38:55that stuff's not going to happen. It
- 1:38:57absolutely will happen. And it might
- 1:38:58even be worse than you imagine. But you
- 1:39:01will not die. And if you use the frame,
- 1:39:04does me losing all of these
- 1:39:06relationships and having more time
- 1:39:08increase the likelihood that I get to my
- 1:39:09goal or decrease the likelihood that I
- 1:39:11get to my goal?
- 1:39:13All of a sudden, when you use the goal
- 1:39:14frame of the best version of you, all of
- 1:39:17a sudden it starts to it starts to make
- 1:39:20things a lot clearer. It's like, no, me
- 1:39:22going to this bachelorette party does
- 1:39:24not increase the likelihood to hit my
- 1:39:25goals.
- 1:39:27And I'm not saying that you have to to
- 1:39:29make that sacrifice every time, but the
- 1:39:31thing is is you're making a sacrifice
- 1:39:33either way. You're either sacrificing
- 1:39:34your goals or you're sacrificing that
- 1:39:36relationship. And so some of you guys
- 1:39:38are like, "Oh, Alex, that sounds
- 1:39:40unbalanced." I'm going to get a couple,
- 1:39:41you know, comments from uh the [ __ ]
- 1:39:43online therapists of like, I think
- 1:39:45emotional well-being and mental health
- 1:39:47is super important. Well, first off, the
- 1:39:49pendulum swinging back. No one gives a
- 1:39:50[ __ ] about the soft stuff anymore. Thank
- 1:39:52[ __ ] God. But at some point everyone
- 1:39:55who wants to achieve great things
- 1:39:57realizes that balance is a myth. And
- 1:39:59once they realize that they become
- 1:40:01someone who achieves great things. At
- 1:40:04some point every person who wants to
- 1:40:06achieve great things realizes that
- 1:40:08balance is a myth. And once they realize
- 1:40:11that they become someone who achieves
- 1:40:14great things. And so there's this whole
- 1:40:17misnomer this whole idea. Think about
- 1:40:19what mediocrity is. It's about being in
- 1:40:21the middle. It's the medium. That's
- 1:40:23being right in the middle, right?
- 1:40:24Balance.
- 1:40:26But anybody who is imbalanced is another
- 1:40:29way of saying more focused on the one
- 1:40:32thing will be better at that thing than
- 1:40:34you. And the question is just whether or
- 1:40:35not that thing that they choose to be
- 1:40:37better at will give them more leverage
- 1:40:38over all that other stuff later.
- 1:40:41And so if you work very hard and you
- 1:40:44create something that's very valuable
- 1:40:45for society, I promise you, you will be
- 1:40:47able to find a hotter wife. I promise
- 1:40:50you, you will have the money that you
- 1:40:51want. I promise you, you can buy the
- 1:40:52time that you want to have. You'll have
- 1:40:54all of that at your disposal. But if you
- 1:40:57choose the balanced life, there's
- 1:40:59nothing wrong with that. I just see that
- 1:41:01there's balance over a lifetime rather
- 1:41:03than balance at every moment of life.
- 1:41:06And so, you might have seasons like I
- 1:41:08took basically a year off during the
- 1:41:10last year of gym launch. I just didn't
- 1:41:12really do a lot. So, I had more time
- 1:41:14than anybody and money, right? But I had
- 1:41:17seasons before that where I didn't take
- 1:41:19any time off. And so I think if you
- 1:41:20expand your time horizon for what
- 1:41:21balance really means that this is a
- 1:41:23softer way of explaining it. Uh then I
- 1:41:26think that that will you know make you
- 1:41:28sleep well at night. But real talk I
- 1:41:30work all the time because I like to do
- 1:41:32it. And I think that once you get a fast
- 1:41:34feedback loop with the work that you
- 1:41:36like that also propels your goals then
- 1:41:38you're not going to want to do anything
- 1:41:38else. And that's it's not like I or some
- 1:41:41of the people that all right it's not
- 1:41:43like the people that you look up to have
- 1:41:44some sort of herculean work ethic or
- 1:41:46discipline that you don't. They like
- 1:41:48things that happen to also bring them
- 1:41:50status. And that means that they went
- 1:41:53through a small period where they
- 1:41:54started doing that thing when they
- 1:41:55weren't good at it and it didn't bring
- 1:41:56them status, but they were able to make
- 1:41:58it through that bridge until eventually
- 1:41:59did start working and did bring them
- 1:42:01status and then they just kept going. So
- 1:42:03you just need enough gusto to start and
- 1:42:06just get through that period to just get
- 1:42:08through your friends saying you suck for
- 1:42:10a little bit. And everything you start
- 1:42:11will not be fun because you'll suck. But
- 1:42:13getting good is fun. Getting better is
- 1:42:16fun. And so I get excited a lot of times
- 1:42:18when I see how bad I am at something
- 1:42:20that's new because I have enough
- 1:42:21generalized reinforcement for learning
- 1:42:23how to get better at things that you
- 1:42:25learn the skill of getting better. Like
- 1:42:27that's a meta skill. You learn how to
- 1:42:29learn. And so just see it as an
- 1:42:30opportunity to learn how to do anything
- 1:42:31better. So if you have a first thing,
- 1:42:33then that's the first thing that you get
- 1:42:34better at. And then you'll learn the
- 1:42:35skill of getting better and you can
- 1:42:36apply it all over the place. So, if
- 1:42:37you're a business owner and you'd like
- 1:42:39to scale, I'd like to invite you out to
- 1:42:40my headquarters for one of our scaling
- 1:42:42workshops where we help identify and
- 1:42:44solve your number one constraint so you
- 1:42:46can start the year with lots of
- 1:42:48momentum. And so, if that sounds at all
- 1:42:49interesting, click the link below, book
- 1:42:50a call with my team, and if you're a
- 1:42:52fit, we'd love to see out of it. Some of
- 1:42:53you guys are listening to this and
- 1:42:54you're like, "Okay, you know, this is
- 1:42:57great. I'm feeling awesome." The thing
- 1:42:58is is that people, maybe it's you, are
- 1:43:01waiting for this perfect moment, but it
- 1:43:03doesn't come right. It happens the
- 1:43:06moment you decide that you're fed up
- 1:43:08with waiting and decide to take action.
- 1:43:10And it only becomes the perfect moment
- 1:43:12when you look back on it because today
- 1:43:14it just looks like now. I had a
- 1:43:16conversation with a young man yesterday
- 1:43:17who said, "Listen, I have demons."
- 1:43:22And I was like, "Bro, you don't have
- 1:43:25[ __ ] demons." I was like, "Shut up."
- 1:43:28And he was like, [laughter]
- 1:43:29I was like, "The thing is And I I was so
- 1:43:31visceral with my reaction because I used
- 1:43:33to say that kind of stuff because I
- 1:43:34thought it made me hard. I thought it
- 1:43:36made me complex. I thought it made
- 1:43:37mysterious. But it's you don't have
- 1:43:40demons. You're not self-sabotaging. You
- 1:43:42don't have mom or dad issues. What you
- 1:43:44have is a lack of skills in how to
- 1:43:47behave in a certain condition. So when
- 1:43:50you say you have demons, what it really
- 1:43:52means if I say, okay, what do you mean
- 1:43:54by that? Define that. How do what is
- 1:43:56define having demons? Right? What I
- 1:43:59don't most people say that they don't
- 1:44:00mean they actually think they have
- 1:44:01spiritual demons inside of them. I'm not
- 1:44:03even going to touch that. What they
- 1:44:04really mean is that under these
- 1:44:06conditions I behave a way that is not
- 1:44:08ideal. And so what that means is you
- 1:44:10have a skill deficiency. No [ __ ] You're
- 1:44:13inexperienced. Of course you have a
- 1:44:15skill deficiency. You don't have demons.
- 1:44:17You don't know how to be consistent.
- 1:44:19You're not you don't have I I just can't
- 1:44:21stay with anybody for a long time. No.
- 1:44:22It either means you have really high
- 1:44:23standards, which is fine, and you
- 1:44:25haven't met that person yet, or you just
- 1:44:27don't know how to behave consistently.
- 1:44:29It's like when I have a sales guy who's
- 1:44:31like, "Hey, you know, I'm 30 days into
- 1:44:33this role and I'm getting I'm getting
- 1:44:34kind of bored taking sales calls." I'm
- 1:44:36like, "Oh, your ability to not be able
- 1:44:38to continue after something gets boring
- 1:44:42and learn to love the incremental
- 1:44:45improvements, the hundred or thousand
- 1:44:47repetitions is the skill discrepancy
- 1:44:50that you need to overcome. The best
- 1:44:52salespeople,
- 1:44:54bad salespeople try and have a couple
- 1:44:57good days. Good salespeople get on hot
- 1:45:00streaks. Great salespeople never get
- 1:45:02cold. And so that takes discipline to
- 1:45:04understand how to consistently get
- 1:45:06yourself hot, how to consistently treat
- 1:45:09every sale the same way you do when
- 1:45:11you're on fire. Because there is no
- 1:45:14being on fire. It means you simply
- 1:45:16behave differently. It's not like you
- 1:45:18have magic. You you pause differently.
- 1:45:21You take longer spaces, you ask the
- 1:45:23question, your tonality shifts. And
- 1:45:25those are skills because you can learn
- 1:45:27them. And so this whole thing of like,
- 1:45:30this is this young man, I'm traumatized.
- 1:45:32First off, you don't even know a [ __ ]
- 1:45:34definition of trauma. All right? Trauma
- 1:45:36is a permanent change in behavior from
- 1:45:38an aversive stimulus, meaning something
- 1:45:40bad happens and forever it changes how
- 1:45:42you act. Now, let's if we understand
- 1:45:45that as the definition of trauma, is
- 1:45:48trauma bad? Well, if I touch a stove and
- 1:45:51then I never touch a stove again when
- 1:45:52it's hot, is that trauma bad? It
- 1:45:54permanently changed my behavior from an
- 1:45:56aversive stimulus. Is that trauma bad?
- 1:45:58Well, it prevented me from get burning
- 1:46:00the house down from, you know,
- 1:46:02permanently damaging my hand in the
- 1:46:03future. No, I would say it was good. And
- 1:46:05so this whole appraisal of your past
- 1:46:07being tough or you don't understand,
- 1:46:10bro. No. And no one cares either. They
- 1:46:12don't understand, nor do they care. And
- 1:46:14so all anyone is going to care about is
- 1:46:16how you act, how you behave, what you do
- 1:46:19based on a series of conditions. And so
- 1:46:21you just need to expose yourself to the
- 1:46:24conditions so that you can get the
- 1:46:25repetition so that you can learn how to
- 1:46:27overcome it. The thing that determines
- 1:46:28whether it's good or bad is whether it
- 1:46:30creates a behavior that's conducive to
- 1:46:31your goals. And so that means that
- 1:46:34fundamentally you can have a stimulus
- 1:46:35like touching the stove that creates a
- 1:46:37behavior that is conducive to the goal.
- 1:46:39In that way, trauma was good. So, by the
- 1:46:43way, parents, when you punish a child,
- 1:46:45the hope is that you traumatize them. Is
- 1:46:46that you permanently change their
- 1:46:47behavior from an aversive stimulus? It's
- 1:46:50just that people don't define words and
- 1:46:51they just shout them all over the place.
- 1:46:52Say, say it's stored in your body. It's
- 1:46:53energy. It's like, no one even knows
- 1:46:54what the [ __ ] that means. Show me on
- 1:46:57someone's body where it's stored. Do me
- 1:46:59an X-ray. Show me where this No. Come
- 1:47:00on. Like, you're saying you're you
- 1:47:02you're storing your emotional trauma
- 1:47:04from your father and your liver.
- 1:47:08Like I can just say words and make
- 1:47:10things up and get people to not if I say
- 1:47:11them with conviction. It doesn't make.
- 1:47:13And so you may have been fooled because
- 1:47:16sometimes it's more convenient to say
- 1:47:18you can cast your power onto this thing
- 1:47:20that happened that was outside of your
- 1:47:22control as the reason why you can't be
- 1:47:23successful because it's easier to say
- 1:47:26that than to say that I chose not to do
- 1:47:29anything about it anyways.
- 1:47:31And again, listen, you can do whatever
- 1:47:33you want. You can just keep wallowing in
- 1:47:34that. You can keep saying that that's
- 1:47:35the reason. And wherever you point is
- 1:47:37where your power is, right? But the only
- 1:47:39time that you'll have more power is if
- 1:47:40you say it's on you. Period. Because all
- 1:47:43of those things may have happened and
- 1:47:44they may have all been terrible. And
- 1:47:47what are you going to do about it,
- 1:47:48right? Because the only per like no one
- 1:47:51cares. Like the world doesn't care. You
- 1:47:54care, which is fine, but like no one
- 1:47:55else does. And the sooner you realize
- 1:47:58that, the sooner you can start doing
- 1:47:59something about it. And so also think
- 1:48:02about this. It's the equal opposite. If
- 1:48:06trauma can create good things, then also
- 1:48:09means that good things can create bad
- 1:48:11behaviors. And so if you win the lottery
- 1:48:14and then you have all these behaviors
- 1:48:15that happen afterwards that are
- 1:48:17negative, then was it good for you? Like
- 1:48:20we talk about these rich and privileged
- 1:48:22kids because it creates behaviors that
- 1:48:23people that actually make it less likely
- 1:48:24they achieve things later. And so just
- 1:48:28think about what occurred and what
- 1:48:30behaviors you take as a result and
- 1:48:32separate good or bad from it. And just
- 1:48:33think, does it make it more likely that
- 1:48:34I hit my goals?
- 1:48:37It makes life a lot easier. And then it
- 1:48:40stops you from speaking in voodoo and
- 1:48:42speaking and appealing to mysticism and
- 1:48:44magic. Like there's this this force
- 1:48:47around I have demons. It's like, dude,
- 1:48:49no. Like you had a girl who cheated on
- 1:48:52you. Okay. Now, what does that change
- 1:48:54about your behavior? I have trust
- 1:48:55issues. No, it just means that under
- 1:48:58these conditions, you are slower to give
- 1:49:02someone access to your bank account or
- 1:49:05slower to move in with someone, who
- 1:49:08cares? And is that a bad thing? And so,
- 1:49:10I'll walk you through a three-step
- 1:49:11framework that has been unbelievably
- 1:49:14valuable to me. And this is from Dr.
- 1:49:15Cashy. Logic, evidence, utility.
- 1:49:20Logic is what does that mean? So, you
- 1:49:23have demons. Okay. What does that mean?
- 1:49:25Define it in terms of behavior. What
- 1:49:27does that mean? Okay, got it. Now, how
- 1:49:30do you know that evidence? So, you say,
- 1:49:33"I have demons." We unpack that and it
- 1:49:35means that uh for you, you
- 1:49:38self-sabotage, which again, define that.
- 1:49:41Okay? It means that I show up late to
- 1:49:43meetings after I get into a job after
- 1:49:47two months of being on time. Okay? So
- 1:49:49after two months of being on time, you
- 1:49:50start being late to stuff that we
- 1:49:53translated from I have demons to I
- 1:49:56self-sabotage to that is the behavior
- 1:49:58that occurs. Got it? Now I would say how
- 1:50:01do you know that? Now a lot of times
- 1:50:03people are like well it's happened. But
- 1:50:04when you actually look at it like it
- 1:50:06happened three times over in, you know,
- 1:50:08in my my last job. Okay. Is it really a
- 1:50:12a problem as you define it or it
- 1:50:14happened in those three occurrences?
- 1:50:16Okay, got it. So now you know now most
- 1:50:18times people are like I don't have any
- 1:50:20data and you're like okay so then this
- 1:50:21is basically made up and when I say made
- 1:50:23up I'm not saying it's like you are a
- 1:50:25liar. I'm just saying that humans work
- 1:50:26in narratives and a lot of times we add
- 1:50:28narratives stories to things that don't
- 1:50:30actually mean anything but it's
- 1:50:33convenient and it's fun and we like
- 1:50:34talking about it but it doesn't mean
- 1:50:35it's true. And so then you move to the
- 1:50:37third one which is and so what utility
- 1:50:40who cares why does this matter? And so
- 1:50:43then you say, "Okay, well this matters
- 1:50:45because it decreases the likelihood that
- 1:50:47I will be able to retain future
- 1:50:48employment." Fine. Then what do we do
- 1:50:50about it? And so you can walk through
- 1:50:53things that you have struggled with in
- 1:50:55the past with simply saying, "Let me
- 1:50:56define this in terms of behavior. How
- 1:50:59what evidence do I have that this is
- 1:51:00actually true that that I've defined it
- 1:51:01based on these things?" And who cares?
- 1:51:05I have demons in the kitchen. All right.
- 1:51:07Just as a completely ridiculous example.
- 1:51:09Okay. Well, in my past, I I've had bad
- 1:51:12things happen, bro. Like, what? Like,
- 1:51:15what occurred? I touched the stove and
- 1:51:17it burned me. Okay, great. Now, we have
- 1:51:21some evidence-wise. How many times did
- 1:51:23it happen? One time. Okay. And it never
- 1:51:26happened again in the future. Okay. What
- 1:51:27did that result in? I don't go into
- 1:51:28kitchens anymore. Okay. Now, this is
- 1:51:31good or bad. When you say, "Who cares?"
- 1:51:33It's in relation to what? My goals. Does
- 1:51:37you not going into the kitchen prevent
- 1:51:38you from achieving your goals? Well, if
- 1:51:40you want to be a chef, yes. If you want
- 1:51:42to be an entrepreneur, no. If you want
- 1:51:44to be a kitchen entrepreneur, probably,
- 1:51:46right? And so, the question is just who
- 1:51:48cares? Why does it matter? And so, so
- 1:51:50much of our time and effort goes into
- 1:51:53explaining things to people that don't
- 1:51:56matter at all that you could literally
- 1:51:58just move on from and just literally
- 1:52:00forget about. You could get over that
- 1:52:02quote trauma by changing the behavior
- 1:52:04that it changed aversively. So in this
- 1:52:07context or in this condition, I behave
- 1:52:08this way and it's not conducive to my
- 1:52:10goals. Great. That's good that you've
- 1:52:11identified it. Cool. So what do we need
- 1:52:13to do so that when you're in the
- 1:52:14condition, how can we increase the
- 1:52:16likelihood that you do act the way that
- 1:52:17you want to? And then you start stacking
- 1:52:18the deck to start shifting the pendulum
- 1:52:21in your favor. And you start attacking
- 1:52:23each of these little problems from
- 1:52:24skills that you have, whether it's
- 1:52:26behavior with people or it's skills at
- 1:52:28work or with a relationship. And you
- 1:52:29just do it one by one by one. And if you
- 1:52:31do it over a very long period of time,
- 1:52:32you get better. I promise you. And I'm
- 1:52:34saying this to somebody who I struggled
- 1:52:36with my demons. You don't understand,
- 1:52:38bro. Like, I have stuff. Like, okay,
- 1:52:42but it doesn't help you. And it also
- 1:52:45doesn't make you look harder.
- 1:52:48It just makes you less capable.
- 1:52:51Losers talk about what happened to them.
- 1:52:53Winners talk about what they made happen
- 1:52:56despite it. Hardship is a reality for
- 1:52:59losers. to winners. Hardship is just
- 1:53:02your origin story. And like I promise
- 1:53:05you, if you can use this frame, like I
- 1:53:06was texting Leila the other day, like
- 1:53:07the bigger the monster, the more epic
- 1:53:09the hero. It's the story that you're
- 1:53:10going to someday tell. When you're 85,
- 1:53:12you're not going to want more boring
- 1:53:14stories, right? The idea is that if
- 1:53:17you're going through hardship now,
- 1:53:18that's the story that you're going to
- 1:53:19tell. And if you believe yourself to be
- 1:53:20the hero that you want to someday
- 1:53:22become, then the harder it is, you're
- 1:53:24like, "Bring it. This is my story. This
- 1:53:26is the Spider-Man getting bitten. This
- 1:53:27is him getting beat up by the bullies.
- 1:53:29This is the origin story. No one cares
- 1:53:31about a hero who never had it hard. I
- 1:53:33bought a lottery ticket years and years
- 1:53:35and years ago when I was in college
- 1:53:37because it was like a a billion or
- 1:53:39something like that back back then that
- 1:53:41was when a billion dollars meant
- 1:53:42something. Um
- 1:53:45but I was in college and the and my
- 1:53:47girlfriend at the time I was talking to
- 1:53:49her and the drawing was that we bought
- 1:53:51them for fun. We bought one ticket. I
- 1:53:53wasn't expecting to win, but it was just
- 1:53:54a it basically I was buying her for the
- 1:53:55conversation. And I thought about it as
- 1:53:57like the drawing got closer and I
- 1:53:59realized I had this big pang of anxiety
- 1:54:00because I was like, "What if I win?" And
- 1:54:03I had this moment of terror because I
- 1:54:06realized that if I won that I would
- 1:54:07never be able to achieve anything that
- 1:54:09anyone thought was my own.
- 1:54:12And that thought terrified me. And
- 1:54:15thankfully I didn't win the billion
- 1:54:17dollars. Um, and I got to make the life
- 1:54:19that I have. And so I think that I think
- 1:54:21Epictitus says this, but it's something
- 1:54:23to the degree of what a shame it would
- 1:54:25be for someone to never encounter
- 1:54:27hardship because they would never be
- 1:54:29able to see who they are.
- 1:54:31And so I think that if you have gone
- 1:54:33through hardship or you are going
- 1:54:35through hardship, this is the
- 1:54:37opportunity to prove to yourself, not
- 1:54:39anyone else, that you are who you say
- 1:54:41you are and you are made of what you say
- 1:54:44you are made of. And you can choose
- 1:54:47to allow that hardship to make you
- 1:54:50harder, to make you more resilient, to
- 1:54:52make you more persistent, to make you
- 1:54:54more relentless, to make you more driven
- 1:54:55towards whatever you want to do or
- 1:54:58whoever you want to be. Or you can allow
- 1:55:00it to be an ankle weight. You can allow
- 1:55:02it to be your trauma, right? That is
- 1:55:05your demon that you're fighting every
- 1:55:07day. But the thing is is like everyone
- 1:55:10has demons. Everyone has hard [ __ ] And
- 1:55:13I want to tell you this frame that'll
- 1:55:15hopefully change someone's perspective,
- 1:55:17which is that your hard stuff may have
- 1:55:20been harder than other people's hard
- 1:55:22stuff, but if I take a human being who
- 1:55:24has never encountered anything and then
- 1:55:26I poke them with a needle, that will be
- 1:55:28a 10 out of 10 hardship for them. And so
- 1:55:30I believe personally that humans
- 1:55:33experience pain the same way. It's why
- 1:55:36when a man feels disrespected, it hurts
- 1:55:39just as much as someone else going
- 1:55:42through another crazy hardship. And you
- 1:55:44know what? Even if that guy's white, a
- 1:55:4710 out of 10 pain still feels like a 10
- 1:55:49out of 10 pain. Now, could that pain be
- 1:55:52less on the absolute scale of worst
- 1:55:54scenario? Yeah, it could be. But also,
- 1:55:58who cares?
- 1:56:00And so my point here is that every
- 1:56:02single human being on earth has gone
- 1:56:03through their version of 10 out of 10
- 1:56:05pain which normalizes pain across the
- 1:56:07spectrum which then leaves you with the
- 1:56:09only natural thing you have left which
- 1:56:10is what do I do now? And if you wanted
- 1:56:12to design the perfect version of you,
- 1:56:14the savage competitor, the gladiator at
- 1:56:16the end of the life that has the scars
- 1:56:18and the scraggly beard but has been
- 1:56:20through [ __ ] and has done things and has
- 1:56:22and has realized their potential. What
- 1:56:24would you do to maximize the likelihood
- 1:56:26that you become that savage hero? Would
- 1:56:30you give them the padded lifestyle?
- 1:56:32Would you give them the immediate win?
- 1:56:33Would you give them the easy life?
- 1:56:36Probably not. You would probably put you
- 1:56:39through what you're going through right
- 1:56:41now to become that person. And so, why
- 1:56:44would you resent the chapter you're in?
- 1:56:46Because it's a requirement for becoming
- 1:56:48who you say you want to be. Let's say
- 1:56:50you've gotten over your little demon
- 1:56:52thing. And when I say gotten over, you
- 1:56:54just stop giving it power by saying it
- 1:56:55now is the reason that you can't be
- 1:56:57successful. Awesome. So, what do you do
- 1:56:59now? Right? So, you got to start
- 1:57:01figuring things out. And that figure it
- 1:57:03out muscle is probably the most powerful
- 1:57:04muscle you can build. It's just saying,
- 1:57:05"Oh, I don't know how to do this. I will
- 1:57:07figure it out." Why? Because I figured
- 1:57:08out things in the past and I can do it
- 1:57:09again. And if that person can do it and
- 1:57:10they're no smarter than I am, they have
- 1:57:11two hands in a brain. I can do it, too.
- 1:57:13So, the next time that you say you can't
- 1:57:15figure something out, just set a timer
- 1:57:17for 20 hours and actually try for 20
- 1:57:19hours before you quit. What you'll often
- 1:57:22realize is it's not hard. You just
- 1:57:23haven't even tried yet. If you can
- 1:57:24shrink the time between saying you want
- 1:57:26to learn something and beginning to try
- 1:57:28the thing and extend the time before you
- 1:57:30say, "Hey, this is hard, then you will
- 1:57:33be able to accomplish way more than you
- 1:57:35think." You can learn most things in 20
- 1:57:37hours. The problem is that most people
- 1:57:38delay the first 20 hours by years. And
- 1:57:40if you really measured yourself by the
- 1:57:42amount of action you take, not your
- 1:57:44desire, not your deservingness, or even
- 1:57:46your effort, you might actually be
- 1:57:48embarrassed because what you're looking
- 1:57:49at is reality. It's about what you do,
- 1:57:51not what you say you're going to do, how
- 1:57:53much you want the outcome from what
- 1:57:55you're doing, how much you think you
- 1:57:56deserve the thing that's going to happen
- 1:57:58after you do it, or how hard you try.
- 1:58:00Because one, no one cares. Two, reality
- 1:58:02doesn't care either, because the only
- 1:58:03thing that matters that you can control
- 1:58:05is input. And you would be absolutely
- 1:58:07astonished at what you can accomplish
- 1:58:09when you give yourself no choice. Every
- 1:58:11third time I do a Q&A, I get asked the
- 1:58:14question, "What keeps you going when
- 1:58:16things were tough? Like, what did you
- 1:58:17think about?" and I could come up with
- 1:58:20something that was really compelling.
- 1:58:22But the honest truth is I just never
- 1:58:24considered quitting. It was just not it
- 1:58:26was just not on my choice of options at
- 1:58:28the table because for me the idea of
- 1:58:31going back to Baltimore as a failure was
- 1:58:33so much worse than anything else that I
- 1:58:36could encounter that it just it just
- 1:58:39wasn't even a consideration. And so the
- 1:58:41only natural option I had was to
- 1:58:42persist, was to endure, was to continue.
- 1:58:45And so I think if you use that frame as
- 1:58:48there have been people who have gone
- 1:58:50through significantly worse than what
- 1:58:51I'm going through right now. And for
- 1:58:53those of you who claim the demon card of
- 1:58:54like I've been through [ __ ] then prove
- 1:58:56it. Was it worse than this? Great. Then
- 1:58:59you can prove that it was so hard by
- 1:59:01being hard now. Across time frames in
- 1:59:04history, across countries, across
- 1:59:06cultures, across age groups, across
- 1:59:08race, gender, everyone respects the man
- 1:59:13who works. Because as men we are always
- 1:59:15judged by what we can do and if you are
- 1:59:18doing things then people know that you
- 1:59:20are contributing that is how you prove
- 1:59:22utility. Work ethic is the currency of
- 1:59:24respect. If you want to earn respect you
- 1:59:26earn it through work and sometimes
- 1:59:28that's working on yourself that's
- 1:59:30sometimes working on a skill working on
- 1:59:31a product but it is all through work
- 1:59:33through effort. I will tell you
- 1:59:34something that shifted my life which is
- 1:59:35that entrepreneurship is not a game of
- 1:59:37best man wins. It's a game of last man
- 1:59:39standing. And there's a lot of games
- 1:59:42that are like this. And fundamentally,
- 1:59:43that's an infinite game frame versus a
- 1:59:46finite game frame. And I will read you
- 1:59:48the quote that Ila had framed and put in
- 1:59:50my office. Ask the girl, shoot the shot,
- 1:59:53launch the business, run the ad, quit
- 1:59:56the job, take the risk. Because when
- 1:59:57you're 85 years old and on your
- 1:59:59deathbed, you're not going to wish you
- 2:00:00had fewer crazy stories. The fastest way
- 2:00:02to become confident is to build
- 2:00:03evidence. Build yourself a stack of
- 2:00:05undeniable proof that you are who you
- 2:00:07say you are. Here's exactly how to do
- 2:00:09that. This is brutally honest advice to
- 2:00:11my younger, less confident self. Having
- 2:00:14an epic story is about asking the girl.
- 2:00:16It's about shooting the shot. It's about
- 2:00:17launching the business, about running
- 2:00:18the ad, about knocking on the door,
- 2:00:20quitting the job, taking the risk.
- 2:00:22[music] When you're 85 years old and on
- 2:00:23your deathbed, you're not going to wish
- 2:00:24you had fewer crazy stories. You're
- 2:00:26going to wish you had taken more shots.
- 2:00:27Don't build confidence. Build evidence.
- 2:00:29[music] Confidence comes as a result of
- 2:00:31evidence, not the other way around.
- 2:00:34Confidence without evidence [music] is a
- 2:00:36delusion. It's you beating your chest,
- 2:00:38looking at yourself in the mirror,
- 2:00:39trying to pretend you're something
- 2:00:40you're not. Do it so you get the
- 2:00:41confidence, but don't think you need
- 2:00:43confidence to do it. So, the whole idea
- 2:00:45of fake it until you make it should
- 2:00:47switch to walk it before you talk it,
- 2:00:49right? Prove it to yourself so you don't
- 2:00:51need to prove it to other people and let
- 2:00:52your path to your talking [music] for
- 2:00:54you. Until you win, effort always goes
- 2:00:56unnoticed. Get used to it. If you aren't
- 2:00:58willing to suck, you're never going to
- 2:01:00get good. Losers stay losers because
- 2:01:03they aren't willing to lose. Confidence
- 2:01:05is also domain specific. So you can be
- 2:01:07really good at public presentations and
- 2:01:09really bad at talking to girls. It takes
- 2:01:11a lot for a skill to transfer between
- 2:01:12domains. And so if you want to get good
- 2:01:14at the thing, don't try and do something
- 2:01:15to the left of it. Just do the [music]
- 2:01:17thing. The first sales consult I ever
- 2:01:19took. I didn't close. And I say that
- 2:01:22because everyone just imagines that Mosy
- 2:01:24just came in just slinging credit cards
- 2:01:26and stacking bodies, right? It didn't
- 2:01:28work that way. I came in, it was a
- 2:01:305-minute conversation. The girl was
- 2:01:31like, "I need to go get my card from
- 2:01:33home." home and I said, "Oh yeah, okay,
- 2:01:34go do that." And she walked away and I
- 2:01:36went to my boss. He's like, "How'd it
- 2:01:37go?" I said, "Oh, I closed her." And he
- 2:01:39was like, "Oh, that's awesome." He's
- 2:01:40like, "You got the credit card?" I said,
- 2:01:41"Oh, no. She's going to come back with
- 2:01:42the card." And he literally stopped what
- 2:01:45he was doing with six other guys around
- 2:01:47him and they all non-stop laugh a minute
- 2:01:51straight. Like they couldn't breathe cuz
- 2:01:53they thought how stupid what I had just
- 2:01:54said was. But I had no idea. And so that
- 2:01:57was my first ever experience in sales.
- 2:01:59I'm known for sales now. And I wouldn't
- 2:02:02even say I'm confident in sales. It's
- 2:02:04just more like this is what works and
- 2:02:06[music] has worked for me. Take it or
- 2:02:08leave it. And so people perceive that as
- 2:02:10confidence, but it's simply just based
- 2:02:12on experience. And confidence comes from
- 2:02:15experience. [music] What it really is is
- 2:02:17a prediction. What you think is going to
- 2:02:19happen will happen. And so even in
- 2:02:21statistics, what is your confidence
- 2:02:22metric? This is 7.8. It's literally just
- 2:02:25what the percentage likelihood that what
- 2:02:26you think is going to happen is going to
- 2:02:28happen. And so, how do you increase the
- 2:02:29likelihood that what you think is going
- 2:02:30to happen is going to happen? Have it
- 2:02:32have happened already. I could have
- 2:02:33either spent [music]
- 2:02:3530 minutes every day looking at myself
- 2:02:36in the mirror and telling myself I was
- 2:02:37going to be a great sales guy, or I
- 2:02:38could have reviewed the [ __ ] script.
- 2:02:40Which one do you think would get make me
- 2:02:41a better salesperson? Reviewing the
- 2:02:43script. You can take all the time that
- 2:02:44you're trying to spend psyching yourself
- 2:02:46up and you'll feel significantly more
- 2:02:48confident [music] not having done that
- 2:02:49and simply knowing what you're going to
- 2:02:50say, which you get from practice. The
- 2:02:52world belongs to those who can keep
- 2:02:54doing without seeing the result of their
- 2:02:56doing. And the longer you can wait to
- 2:02:58see the result of your doing while still
- 2:02:59continuing to do is the extent to which
- 2:03:02you can win big in life. For example, to
- 2:03:04be a top 1% podcaster, you have to
- 2:03:06upload 21 podcasts. 21. Top 1%. 90% of
- 2:03:11people don't get past one. 9% don't get
- 2:03:14past 20. [music] And then 1% of
- 2:03:17podcasters of all of them make it to 21
- 2:03:19plus. So when people say try harder, it
- 2:03:22usually just means don't give up. The
- 2:03:23price for excellence has never been so
- 2:03:25low. People give up so easily now that
- 2:03:28it's just so easy to win by [music] just
- 2:03:31being willing to post 20 times. You're
- 2:03:34in the top 1%. Like I'm at the top 1%.
- 2:03:36We're not even talking 10. Top half. Top
- 2:03:391%. People are so afraid of being
- 2:03:43humiliated. They get the long-term
- 2:03:45humiliation of never amounting to
- 2:03:47anything. No one's going to watch your
- 2:03:48first 20 episodes anyways. And even if
- 2:03:50they do, it doesn't matter because
- 2:03:52that's not what you're building towards.
- 2:03:54Like you posting those 20 isn't what you
- 2:03:56judge yourself on. You should be judging
- 2:03:57yourself on the difference between your
- 2:03:58first one and your 20th one. Are you
- 2:04:00better? Probably. And the difference
- 2:04:02between your 20th one and your hundth
- 2:04:03one because the win is you. You are the
- 2:04:06asset you're building, not the downloads
- 2:04:09that you get on your first shot. Mosy
- 2:04:11immediately had a podcast with millions
- 2:04:13of downloads every single month.
- 2:04:14>> [music]
- 2:04:15>> No, I spent 4 and a half years making
- 2:04:18two podcasts a week straight. Didn't
- 2:04:20miss. And guess how many podcast
- 2:04:22downloads I was getting per month at the
- 2:04:23end of that? 2 to 3,000 downloads a
- 2:04:25month. Not a lot. I used to think to
- 2:04:28myself, okay, well, each one of these
- 2:04:29podcasts gets like 200 downloads. Well,
- 2:04:32200 downloads is like an auditorium of
- 2:04:34people. And so, would I feel okay giving
- 2:04:36a speech to 200 people? Yeah. And even
- 2:04:39before that, when they was getting like
- 2:04:4010 or 15 downloads per episode, if I had
- 2:04:42a little lunch and learn that I would I
- 2:04:44used to have to do to like get leads for
- 2:04:46a business, I'd be fine talking to a
- 2:04:48group of 10 or 15 people because the
- 2:04:49reality is that those people are doing
- 2:04:50me more of a favor than I'm doing them.
- 2:04:52They're literally giving me their ears
- 2:04:54so that I can practice my voice and how
- 2:04:56to talk and how to present. And it was
- 2:04:58only at year 4 and a half to five when
- 2:05:00things started taking off. And you know
- 2:05:01what the two things that changed are?
- 2:05:03One is I did call it I changed it from
- 2:05:05gym secrets to just the game which was a
- 2:05:08business thing. So it made it more
- 2:05:09applicable to more people. And the
- 2:05:10second thing and here's the real one is
- 2:05:12that I sold a company for $46 million.
- 2:05:14And so people are like oh what does this
- 2:05:16guy have to say? And the big thing that
- 2:05:18everyone misses is people try and
- 2:05:19dissect my content. The message is 10%
- 2:05:23of how people consume it. 90% [music] is
- 2:05:25the context around the message. So Elon
- 2:05:28Musk can tweet on the toilet and be
- 2:05:30like, "I'm on the throne taking a shit."
- 2:05:32And it'll get a million likes. [music]
- 2:05:34Why? Because it's Elon Musk. He's the
- 2:05:36richest man in the world and owns three
- 2:05:37of the biggest companies that are most
- 2:05:38innovative of all time. I don't kid
- 2:05:40myself and think that like my content is
- 2:05:42so much better than other people.
- 2:05:43There's plenty of people with better
- 2:05:44content than me that don't get the same
- 2:05:45views. And the reason is [music] because
- 2:05:46they don't have the context. They don't
- 2:05:48have the proof. And solve for the proof.
- 2:05:50And then the content will take care of
- 2:05:51itself. Because one, you will know what
- 2:05:54you're talking about because you have
- 2:05:55proof that you know what you're talking
- 2:05:56about. and people will believe you.
- 2:05:59Which is why you should solve for
- 2:06:00evidence above everything else. Like
- 2:06:02evidence gives you the confidence. If
- 2:06:04someone says, "Alex, I don't think you
- 2:06:05know [ __ ] about business." I'd be like,
- 2:06:06"Okay." It doesn't really affect me. I
- 2:06:08do know we crossed $100 million in net
- 2:06:09worth at age 32. I know that. But if
- 2:06:11someone said that to you and you haven't
- 2:06:13accomplished anything, you don't have
- 2:06:15anything to stand back on and it hurts
- 2:06:16you more. But I have proof. So it's like
- 2:06:18you can just deflect it towards the
- 2:06:20proof and keep living your life. The
- 2:06:21secret to longevity is, especially in
- 2:06:23the content game, but really in any game
- 2:06:24that you're trying to at least help
- 2:06:25other people with, is that if you've
- 2:06:28done the thing, you can be certain
- 2:06:30rather than confident. Be certain based
- 2:06:32on what you've done, not based on what
- 2:06:33you say other people should do. There
- 2:06:35used to be too big to fail. And I think
- 2:06:37there's an alternative, which is too
- 2:06:38good to fail. If you make your stuff so
- 2:06:40[ __ ] good that only one person who
- 2:06:42gets exposed to it sends it to somebody
- 2:06:43else, then you have nothing to worry
- 2:06:45about and you will eventually get
- 2:06:46discovered. It's a time [music] game.
- 2:06:48And in the meanwhile, you just keep
- 2:06:50getting better, which is the point,
- 2:06:52because at the end of the day, you're
- 2:06:53going to die. Everyone's going to forget
- 2:06:54about you anyways. [music] And so, you
- 2:06:56might as well just work on the one asset
- 2:06:57that you get to keep for the rest of
- 2:06:58your life, which is you. And rather than
- 2:06:59measuring yourself based on how many
- 2:07:02views he gets versus how many views you
- 2:07:03get, measure yourself by how much work
- 2:07:05he puts into one of his shorts versus
- 2:07:07what you put into one of your shorts.
- 2:07:09And then you might think the output is
- 2:07:10more reasonable. And if there's a top
- 2:07:12sales guy in your organization who's
- 2:07:13making more money than you, compare not
- 2:07:15what his commission check is to yours
- 2:07:17every month, compare how many calls he's
- 2:07:19making, how many times he practices the
- 2:07:21script, how many calls he's made before
- 2:07:22you, how many sales he's closed before
- 2:07:24you, what time a day he shows up at
- 2:07:26work, what time a day he leaves, whether
- 2:07:28he works weekends or not, whether he's
- 2:07:30willing to hop on the phone in a family
- 2:07:32context so they can still close the
- 2:07:33deal. If you're doing all the inputs,
- 2:07:35the m the outputs will always match on a
- 2:07:37long enough time horizon. And if you are
- 2:07:39new to the game, then my recommendation
- 2:07:41is not only to match inputs, but to
- 2:07:43double or triple the inputs that someone
- 2:07:45ahead of you is doing. And the reason
- 2:07:46you do that is because if you just match
- 2:07:48your inputs, then you're always going to
- 2:07:49be behind them because they're already
- 2:07:51ahead of you because they're better than
- 2:07:52you. And so if you both do the same
- 2:07:53amount of work, they're going to keep
- 2:07:54getting better and so are you. So you
- 2:07:55have to do twice the work. You got to be
- 2:07:57like Kobe, right? Where everyone else is
- 2:07:58doing one practice a day, you do two
- 2:08:00practices a day. And in the beginning,
- 2:08:01they'll be better than you and then
- 2:08:02you'll match them. But because you're
- 2:08:03doing twice the work, eventually you'll
- 2:08:05get better and then that's how you win.
- 2:08:06Yeah. Again, one of the biggest
- 2:08:07misnomers in in whatever endeavor you're
- 2:08:09trying to track is people track the
- 2:08:10wrong metrics. They track the lagging
- 2:08:12metrics rather than the leading [snorts]
- 2:08:13metrics. Lagging metrics are what
- 2:08:15happen. Those are the outputs. And if
- 2:08:16you want to track those, fine. [music]
- 2:08:18But the real things to track are what
- 2:08:20you're doing to create the outputs. So,
- 2:08:22I don't want to necessarily even track
- 2:08:23sales. I want to track how many calls
- 2:08:25I'm making. If I'm trying to get in
- 2:08:27shape, I'm not necessarily going to
- 2:08:28track the weight I'm doing. I'm going to
- 2:08:29track how many calories I'm eating. And
- 2:08:31so, the more ways you measure, the more
- 2:08:33ways you can win. [music] And so the
- 2:08:34idea, the ultimate win at life is where
- 2:08:37you can shift things that are out of
- 2:08:39your control that you deem winning to
- 2:08:41things that are under your control which
- 2:08:42you can deem winning. Because if you're
- 2:08:44measuring on whether you lost the fat or
- 2:08:46not, sometimes people take longer, some
- 2:08:48people don't. That's something that you
- 2:08:49actually can't control. What you can
- 2:08:51control are the inputs. And so if you
- 2:08:53say based on this, if I do this one
- 2:08:55thing every day for a long enough period
- 2:08:56of time, I'll eventually get there. the
- 2:08:58real winners. Cut out the I'll
- 2:09:00eventually get there and say if I do
- 2:09:02this every day, I have won. The thing
- 2:09:04that I try and focus on now is the delta
- 2:09:06between how hard I tried and how hard I
- 2:09:08can possibly try. And if I know that the
- 2:09:11gap between those two is zero, then I
- 2:09:13have won. [music] And I've decided to
- 2:09:15spend a inordinate amount of effort
- 2:09:17trying to make that my definition of
- 2:09:19winning is that there's nothing left in
- 2:09:21the tank. If you get into a harder
- 2:09:23career path or one that takes more reps
- 2:09:25to get good at or more reps to get into,
- 2:09:27then every day you can win based on
- 2:09:30saying like everyone else does 100, I do
- 2:09:32250 and I have nothing left to give. I
- 2:09:35won and that should satisfy you. And if
- 2:09:37[music] you're if you're obsessive on
- 2:09:38the external thing, that takes too long
- 2:09:41and you will give up too soon. One of
- 2:09:43the things that took me too long to
- 2:09:44learn was the difference between the
- 2:09:45finite and infinite [music] frame. And
- 2:09:46so finite frame is where you have known
- 2:09:49players, agreed upon rules, and a way to
- 2:09:51[music] win or lose at the end. And then
- 2:09:53the game is over. Infinite frame, you
- 2:09:55have known and unknown players, no
- 2:09:57agreed upon rules, and the point of the
- 2:09:58game is to [music] keep the game going.
- 2:09:59And all the greatest games that I've
- 2:10:01ever participated in, marriage, health,
- 2:10:03business, you don't win at marriage.
- 2:10:06[music] The point is to stay married.
- 2:10:07You don't win at health. The point is to
- 2:10:09stay in shape. You don't win at
- 2:10:11business. The point is to stay in
- 2:10:13business. [music]
- 2:10:14And so by default, if you don't give up,
- 2:10:18you win. And [music] so that's the big
- 2:10:20frame shift, which is why leaving
- 2:10:22everything on the field is the way you
- 2:10:23have to define winning if you want to
- 2:10:24win in the long term. And anything worth
- 2:10:26doing [music]
- 2:10:27takes great time. If you stick with it
- 2:10:29and you make that the win, you'll notice
- 2:10:31that the external win will just happen
- 2:10:33on its own. And if you really commit to
- 2:10:36that perspective, it won't even mean
- 2:10:38much to you. Because if you make that
- 2:10:40everything, it's the same thing with the
- 2:10:41guys who win the golds and then kill
- 2:10:43themselves or win the championship and
- 2:10:44then go into these massive depressions.
- 2:10:46It's because they're playing the wrong
- 2:10:47game. When Kobe was asked shortly before
- 2:10:49he died like, "Do you think that you're
- 2:10:51somebody who's afraid of losing or do
- 2:10:52you think you're somebody who loves
- 2:10:54winning?" He basically denied both
- 2:10:55frames. He said, I'm paraphrasing, "I
- 2:10:57just love playing to the best of my
- 2:10:59ability." And that's what he measures
- 2:11:01himself off of. The fact that the world
- 2:11:03chooses to measure him on the fact that
- 2:11:05he's won so many games. That's the
- 2:11:06[music] world's problem,
- 2:11:08not ours. It's saying I'm game master,
- 2:11:11not a player, and I choose to play by
- 2:11:13these rules. And as long as I am
- 2:11:15playing, I win by default. And it's cuz
- 2:11:17I'm not accepting the world's rules for
- 2:11:19winning. I make my own. An easier
- 2:11:20analogy here is, and this is a Naval
- 2:11:22Ravicon quote, [music] he said, "What
- 2:11:24looks like work to other people should
- 2:11:25feel like play for you." If you look at
- 2:11:27an artist and he's painting, you're
- 2:11:29like, "Hey, how soon are you going to
- 2:11:30finish that painting?" The point for the
- 2:11:32artist is to paint. [music] He'll finish
- 2:11:34that piece and he'll start the next one.
- 2:11:36But the process of painting is the thing
- 2:11:38that they enjoy. And so the idea is that
- 2:11:40if you can commit and the broader you
- 2:11:42can generalize what you're committing
- 2:11:43to, the easier it will be to stick with
- 2:11:45it. So you might be like, I love making
- 2:11:47calls, but I hate entering things in the
- 2:11:49CRM. Well, both of those are required
- 2:11:51for the role of sales. And so I prefer
- 2:11:53to chunk up a level and say, I prefer to
- 2:11:56do hard work because of what that work
- 2:11:58does to me. Then whether I'm putting
- 2:12:00[ __ ] into the CRM or editing a document
- 2:12:02or having a hard conversation, all of
- 2:12:04those things are difficult and I see
- 2:12:06those as all contributing to the person
- 2:12:07I ultimately want to be until eventually
- 2:12:09I die and it won't matter anyways. And
- 2:12:11so the only asset that you really get to
- 2:12:12keep with you is your character and
- 2:12:14that's the only thing you keep building.
- 2:12:15And so if you make the character the W
- 2:12:18at the end of the day, did or I did I
- 2:12:20not contribute to the character of the
- 2:12:21person that I want to become? If that's
- 2:12:23the W every day, you can never lose. If
- 2:12:26you have your menu option of things that
- 2:12:28you can do in life, just remove quitting
- 2:12:30as one of them and then try your next
- 2:12:31idea. And if you are in that rocky cut
- 2:12:33scene and you're two [music] months in,
- 2:12:36three months in, remember that the rocky
- 2:12:38cut scene in the movie lasts a couple
- 2:12:39seconds and the rocky cut scene in real
- 2:12:42life might last a few years. [music] And
- 2:12:43so whenever I get to a low point where I
- 2:12:45think, why do I even bother doing this?
- 2:12:47I just like to remind myself this is
- 2:12:49where most people stop and [music] this
- 2:12:51is why they don't win. And as hard as
- 2:12:52this is going to sound, the best thing
- 2:12:54that I ever did was not listen to other
- 2:12:56people's opinions about my life. They
- 2:12:58don't want the best version of you.
- 2:13:00[music] They want the version of you who
- 2:13:02best serves them. And unfortunately, the
- 2:13:06closer people are to you, the more
- 2:13:07similarly they'll see themselves and
- 2:13:09you. And the more your success will make
- 2:13:12them feel bad about themselves. And I
- 2:13:13can promise you this from somebody who
- 2:13:15might be a little further. [music] I
- 2:13:16have more people who root for me now
- 2:13:18that I've already won than people who
- 2:13:19rooted for me along the way. No one is
- 2:13:21doing as well as you think they're
- 2:13:23doing. So by comparison, everyone is
- 2:13:26better off than they think because the
- 2:13:28cumulative median visually is probably
- 2:13:31three times higher than what the actual
- 2:13:33median is. And so if you're like, "Oh,
- 2:13:35I'm average or slightly below average
- 2:13:37compared to the perceived median of
- 2:13:39society. You're probably way above
- 2:13:40average." And that's okay. And being
- 2:13:44above or below average doesn't even
- 2:13:45matter anyways because [music]
- 2:13:47you've got a lot of innings left.
- 2:13:49there's a lot of quarters left to play.
- 2:13:51And so like until the day you die, you
- 2:13:54still have hope. You still have a
- 2:13:55chance. You can still keep moving
- 2:13:56forward. Whenever someone gives you your
- 2:13:57their opinion about what you should do
- 2:13:58with their your life, it's really them
- 2:14:00saying, "This is my preference of how I
- 2:14:02want to live my life." [music] And I
- 2:14:04say, "Great. Live your life that way and
- 2:14:05I'll live my life this way." Because me
- 2:14:08living my life has no effect on you. So
- 2:14:10live your life the way you want to live
- 2:14:11it. And I don't want your life either.
- 2:14:13They state make those statements because
- 2:14:15they feel uncomfortable and so they have
- 2:14:18to like release it and so they say that
- 2:14:20to you to make themselves feel better
- 2:14:22and that's their problem not yours.
- 2:14:23[music] I think I've learned a lot of
- 2:14:25frames around not caring about others
- 2:14:27people's opinions be out of necessity
- 2:14:29because I was so crippled by the
- 2:14:31opinions of other [music] people for
- 2:14:32what felt like such a long time that I
- 2:14:35always had to face my death in order to
- 2:14:37get myself to move. And so I talk about
- 2:14:38death a lot because it has actually been
- 2:14:40one of the few things that actually
- 2:14:41motivates me to change my behavior. And
- 2:14:43so when I had done all the things that I
- 2:14:45thought would impress other people, one,
- 2:14:48I realized that they didn't really care.
- 2:14:50[music] And secondly, I realized that I
- 2:14:52deeply cared about how much I hated my
- 2:14:53life. When I was like, is this what
- 2:14:55winning feels like? Because if this is
- 2:14:57what winning is, then I don't want to
- 2:14:58play. By thinking, I'd rather be dead
- 2:15:01than continue to play this game. I was
- 2:15:03forced to change the game I was playing,
- 2:15:04which is like, well, what is a game that
- 2:15:06I would like to win at? Well, I'd like
- 2:15:08to win a game that [music] is by rules
- 2:15:10that I set out and there are things that
- 2:15:11I can control. And then those people
- 2:15:14because you break their mold of what
- 2:15:15they're supposed to be doing and they
- 2:15:16might be miserable, too, but they are
- 2:15:18not willing to take the risk that you're
- 2:15:19willing to take because they care about
- 2:15:20other people's opinions more than you do
- 2:15:22because they haven't gone through that
- 2:15:23little journey that you just went
- 2:15:24through. Fine. [music] You do it your
- 2:15:26way. They do it their way. I mean, I
- 2:15:28went from prodigal son, my father's
- 2:15:29super proud of me, graduating Vanderbilt
- 2:15:31in three years, president of the
- 2:15:32fraternity, vice president of the
- 2:15:33powerlifting team, management
- 2:15:34consultant, [music] to a minimum wage
- 2:15:37employee. Like, that's a pretty
- 2:15:38significant drop in status. I have these
- 2:15:40frames because [music] people will say
- 2:15:42whatever they want, but for me, that
- 2:15:43relative drop in status was a lot. I
- 2:15:46went from about as high status as you
- 2:15:47can get in a as a 22-year-old to about
- 2:15:51as low status as you can get. I mean, I
- 2:15:52remember having people be like, "So, did
- 2:15:54you go to college?" And I was like,
- 2:15:56"Yeah, I went to college and I [ __ ]
- 2:15:58murdered it and I did everything." And
- 2:16:00the cuz the implied question is, "Why
- 2:16:01are you here?" And so that's what in the
- 2:16:04beginning hurt a ton. But then I just
- 2:16:06realized that they just didn't know and
- 2:16:08they were asking [music] genuinely. And
- 2:16:09all of my judgment around that was just
- 2:16:11my own problem. How I'm perceiving this
- 2:16:13question is affecting my mood to such a
- 2:16:15great degree. What if I applied this to
- 2:16:17every question? All these people are
- 2:16:18asking me things and I'm either getting
- 2:16:20offended or getting complimented, but
- 2:16:21the statement doesn't change. So that
- 2:16:23sounds like a me problem. [music] And so
- 2:16:24the more I started diving into things
- 2:16:26like that, the less bothered I became by
- 2:16:28other everyone else's opinion because
- 2:16:30they also have no context. [music] Even
- 2:16:31if they did mean it as an insult, so
- 2:16:34what if they're saying, "Well, I'm
- 2:16:35better than you." I'd be like, "Yes, you
- 2:16:37are." A lot of even really successful
- 2:16:39people frame their success around trying
- 2:16:41to prove someone wrong, right? But when
- 2:16:43you try and create your entire existence
- 2:16:46in opposition to someone, you actually
- 2:16:47give them complete control over your
- 2:16:49life. It means that because of the
- 2:16:50things that this person has said, I will
- 2:16:51choose [music] to change all of my
- 2:16:52behavior. Which basically means that the
- 2:16:54directives from that person have
- 2:16:56commanded you to do whatever you do.
- 2:16:57[music] And if you like to be a free
- 2:16:59person and want to be somebody who acts
- 2:17:00of their own valition, then [music] I
- 2:17:03choose to accept insults so that I can
- 2:17:06live my life rather than living in
- 2:17:08contrast to them and giving my control
- 2:17:09to the person who insulted me. I that
- 2:17:11would mean I put me changing your mind
- 2:17:14above my goals, which I don't do. My
- 2:17:16goals are more important to me than
- 2:17:17changing your mind. I'm super sensitive
- 2:17:19to IM statements, labeling statements
- 2:17:21like this. Like, I'm a neat freak. I'm
- 2:17:23the type of person who. So, whenever
- 2:17:25you're dating someone, you're getting to
- 2:17:26know someone, people like to blanket I
- 2:17:28am statements really early on to set the
- 2:17:30stage. Like, I'm this type I'm the type
- 2:17:31of person who likes to show up early. I
- 2:17:32like to clean things. I'm a labeler. I'm
- 2:17:34a whatever. And then, and this is the
- 2:17:36insidious part, they then say because,
- 2:17:38[music] and then they insert a reason
- 2:17:40that they made up or that sounded good
- 2:17:42in the past and people nodded their
- 2:17:43heads and agreed [music] with because my
- 2:17:46mom never loved me enough. because I
- 2:17:48didn't get enough hugs, because I gave a
- 2:17:50speech once and everyone laughed at me.
- 2:17:52[music] Because you don't know. And the
- 2:17:54reality is you will never know. All we
- 2:17:56know is that you do a certain type of
- 2:17:58behavior. That's it. [music] By giving
- 2:18:00these because statements all this power,
- 2:18:02you actually put all the power into
- 2:18:04something that is unchangeable in the
- 2:18:05past and so you have to keep dealing
- 2:18:07with it. Whereas, if you just said, I do
- 2:18:09these things period. Now, if I want to
- 2:18:12change what I do, then I should just
- 2:18:13reward myself in the present for doing
- 2:18:14something different. And that makes it a
- 2:18:16lot more malleable and it makes your
- 2:18:17identity and what you do as a result or
- 2:18:19rather what you do and your identity as
- 2:18:21a result something under your control.
- 2:18:23You don't want to blame the things in
- 2:18:24the past that you can't change. You want
- 2:18:25to blame things in the present that you
- 2:18:27can't. So if you said I have trouble
- 2:18:29getting close to girls because my mom
- 2:18:31and I aren't close one, you give your
- 2:18:34mother all the power in your love life.
- 2:18:37You give power to something that
- 2:18:38happened in the past that you can't
- 2:18:39change [music] to things that are
- 2:18:40happening in the present that you can
- 2:18:41change. And so would it be more useful
- 2:18:43to say in the past I have struggled to
- 2:18:46get close to [music] girls period. Now
- 2:18:49that could be for a number of reasons.
- 2:18:51Thing is is that you don't know what
- 2:18:53reason it is cuz I could say let's say
- 2:18:55imagine all these things happened. You
- 2:18:56struggled with your mom. Let's say you
- 2:18:58had a bad breakup at some point in your
- 2:18:59life. You're not in shape. I could say I
- 2:19:02struggle getting close to girls. And I
- 2:19:04could use any of those three as my
- 2:19:06reasons. But which of those serve me?
- 2:19:08None of them. All we know is that you
- 2:19:11struggle to get close to girls. Okay.
- 2:19:13Well, then just look at what it would
- 2:19:15take to get close to girls and then do
- 2:19:17that rather than having this other thing
- 2:19:19that's attached to the behavior that you
- 2:19:21can't do anything about. It just makes
- 2:19:23changing who you are and what you do a
- 2:19:25lot easier. Sometimes people are such
- 2:19:27douchebags. They will tell a young
- 2:19:29child, "You will never have a successful
- 2:19:31relationship with a woman because you
- 2:19:32don't respect or love me." A [music]
- 2:19:34mother. Or the reverse could be true of
- 2:19:36a father. They're a [ __ ] douchebag
- 2:19:37for saying that because they are
- 2:19:40labeling you with something [music] that
- 2:19:41you can't change. But that's their
- 2:19:43problem. It also is no basis. In fact,
- 2:19:46when people are like, "Look at how the
- 2:19:47son treats the mother. That's how he's
- 2:19:49going to treat his wife." Why the [ __ ]
- 2:19:52would I treat my wife like I treat my
- 2:19:53mother? Dear God, that's just a
- 2:19:56statement that sounds good but has no
- 2:19:57basis in fact. You treat your wife like
- 2:19:59you treat your wife. You treat your
- 2:20:00mother like you treat your mother.
- 2:20:01They're different people. People want to
- 2:20:03have problems because it gives them a
- 2:20:05reason to suck and it be okay. [music]
- 2:20:07It gives them ego padding so they can
- 2:20:09protect themselves for the reason why
- 2:20:11they're not successful, for the reason
- 2:20:13they haven't accomplished what they said
- 2:20:14they were going to accomplish. And so
- 2:20:16they lean on their potential, and their
- 2:20:18trauma as the two reasons that people
- 2:20:20prop up. I've got lots of potential, but
- 2:20:22I have all this trauma. And neither of
- 2:20:23those matter. I've gone through three
- 2:20:25stages of like mental development in
- 2:20:27terms of how I see changing my behavior.
- 2:20:29In the beginning, I attributed my
- 2:20:30behavior to my past traumas. The second
- 2:20:33phase was that I I chose to change the
- 2:20:35story. What if my mother was just trying
- 2:20:37to feel better and it wasn't my fault.
- 2:20:39So then I changed my behavior in that
- 2:20:40sense. The third phase, which is where
- 2:20:42I'm at now, maybe there'll be a fourth
- 2:20:43phase, but the the third phase was I
- 2:20:45behave this way, period. The because
- 2:20:47statement in the second half is
- 2:20:48completely irrelevant. One, because I
- 2:20:51don't know it. Two, because I can't
- 2:20:52change it. So I might as well just
- 2:20:53choose [music] to do the thing that I
- 2:20:54want to do. Irrelevant of my past. The
- 2:20:56single strongest predictor of my
- 2:20:57behavior is what will make the more epic
- 2:20:59story. I've thought about that frame a
- 2:21:01lot and it's still continued to win out.
- 2:21:03And so when I'm forced to [music] make a
- 2:21:05decision between two things, I prefer to
- 2:21:08choose the one that's the more epic
- 2:21:09story because either you have an epic
- 2:21:10story of failure or you have an epic
- 2:21:12story of success. But no 85year-olds are
- 2:21:14regretting their epic stories. They are
- 2:21:16regretting the stories they never told.
- 2:21:17Our minds are meaning-making machines
- 2:21:19and they have to be because they create
- 2:21:20associations between things we know and
- 2:21:22things we don't know. That's how we
- 2:21:23learn. The problem is that our brains
- 2:21:25will make wrong associations and then
- 2:21:27they will plague us for the rest of our
- 2:21:28lives. But we can just redefine what the
- 2:21:30association means for ourel to make our
- 2:21:31lives easier. Because whether you miss
- 2:21:33the game-winning shot when there's a
- 2:21:34huge crowd or you miss it when no one
- 2:21:36else is there, the only reason it hurts
- 2:21:38more is because you choose to let it
- 2:21:39hurt you more. Now, there are things
- 2:21:40that you can do prior to the
- 2:21:41game-winning shot that can increase the
- 2:21:42likelihood that you make it, which is
- 2:21:44that you practice way more in high
- 2:21:45stakes conditions over and over and over
- 2:21:47again. If you do that, it increases the
- 2:21:48likelihood, your confidence that you'll
- 2:21:50be able to make it. Why? Because you've
- 2:21:51made them before. And if you're like,
- 2:21:53well, I missed my first ever
- 2:21:54game-winning shot. Now, what do I
- 2:21:55[music] do? But you practice in every
- 2:21:57other condition that's as close to that
- 2:21:58as you can until eventually you make
- 2:21:59one. And then when you do make one,
- 2:22:00you'll have evidence that you've made
- 2:22:01one and you try and make one again. What
- 2:22:03you probably don't know is that Michael
- 2:22:04Jordan has missed more game-winning
- 2:22:06shots than he has made. But he's
- 2:22:07remembered for the ones that he made.
- 2:22:09But how was he able to make them? By
- 2:22:10missing and being willing to shoot
- 2:22:11again. On that basis of story, the many
- 2:22:14excuses that we give ourselves in
- 2:22:15reverse can make a more epic story. And
- 2:22:18so rather than say like these are all
- 2:22:20the reasons that I can't succeed, I
- 2:22:22think reframing that as these are all
- 2:22:24the reasons that when I succeed it'll be
- 2:22:25an even better story and it'll be more
- 2:22:28inspiring to other people is a much more
- 2:22:29powerful frame. The more disadvantages
- 2:22:31you have when you start, the more epic
- 2:22:32story you have when you win. Donald
- 2:22:34Miller has one of the most powerful
- 2:22:35frames of [music] heroes and villains
- 2:22:36I've ever heard of. Heroes and villains
- 2:22:38always have the same backstory. It's
- 2:22:40pain. They're always an orphan, right?
- 2:22:42Or [music] the the villain has some sort
- 2:22:44of disfigurement to show that they went
- 2:22:46through hard times. The difference is
- 2:22:48what the character chooses to do about
- 2:22:50it. Villains say, "The world hurt me.
- 2:22:53I'm going to hurt it back." Heroes say,
- 2:22:55"The world hurt me. [music] I'm not
- 2:22:57going to let anyone else hurt this way."
- 2:22:58So, heroes use pain. Villains are used
- 2:23:01by it. [music] And so, I think all of us
- 2:23:03have the choice to become our own
- 2:23:04heroes, our own villains in our own life
- 2:23:06simply by how we choose to deal with the
- 2:23:08pain that we all inevitably experience.
- 2:23:10So, pain is a constant. [music]
- 2:23:12The choice about how we react to it is
- 2:23:14the thing that dictates the path of our
- 2:23:16lives. You know, there there are certain
- 2:23:18rules of playing the game that have
- 2:23:19served me really well. One of them is,
- 2:23:22[music] and that's okay. And I probably
- 2:23:25use that frame more than anything else,
- 2:23:28which is I'm not close with XYZ
- 2:23:32relative, [music] your parent, your mom,
- 2:23:34your sister, your brother. And that's
- 2:23:36okay. I spent a lot of my mental effort
- 2:23:39trying to untangle stories [music] that
- 2:23:40I told in the past about things that
- 2:23:42were my fault or were a problem. And the
- 2:23:44easiest way that I found to solve
- 2:23:45problems is to decide they're not
- 2:23:46problems to begin with. I have a handful
- 2:23:48of pictures that I took for the first 5
- 2:23:51[music] years of sucking during
- 2:23:52business. And I use those pictures all
- 2:23:55the time, every day. [music] And the
- 2:23:58zillions of pictures after I became
- 2:24:01successful, I barely use any of them.
- 2:24:03The time to document your life is when
- 2:24:05it [music] sucks, not when it's great.
- 2:24:07Because those are the stories that
- 2:24:09you're going to tell. And those are
- 2:24:10going to be the reminders that you use
- 2:24:12in the present day of things that you
- 2:24:14have been through and proof as to who
- 2:24:16you really are. Because my favorite line
- 2:24:17in the matrix [music] is in the second
- 2:24:20or third matrix when Morpheus is
- 2:24:22standing on the hill and he's looking
- 2:24:24out towards everyone. And he said, "I
- 2:24:25stand here truthfully unafraid, [music]
- 2:24:28not because of the path that lies before
- 2:24:29me, but because of the path that lies
- 2:24:31behind me." And so the struggle period
- 2:24:33that you may be in right now is the path
- 2:24:36behind your future self that you are
- 2:24:38building. so that that man or that woman
- 2:24:40can stand on the pulpit and look at you
- 2:24:42straight dead in the eyes in the mirror
- 2:24:44and say, "I am confident [music]
- 2:24:46and I stand truthfully here unafraid,
- 2:24:48not because of what I said my goal is
- 2:24:49going to be, but because [music] what
- 2:24:50I've been through to get here." And so,
- 2:24:52here's my advice to my younger self.
- 2:24:54Document your life more. [music]
- 2:24:55Otherwise, you'll forget the details.
- 2:24:57And the details are what make it worth
- 2:24:59remembering. It's the times you're
- 2:25:00sleeping on the floor. It's the time the
- 2:25:02person walks out and you miss the
- 2:25:03seventh sale that day. It's the time
- 2:25:05when your bank account's at its absolute
- 2:25:06lowest. [music] It's when your car
- 2:25:07breaks down on the side of the road and
- 2:25:09you're like, "What am I going to do now?
- 2:25:10I can barely afford this." Right? Those
- 2:25:11are the moments, the ones that you want
- 2:25:13to ignore, the ones that you want to
- 2:25:14look away from, that are the ones that
- 2:25:15you need to capture because those are
- 2:25:16the moments that you will tell in the
- 2:25:18future of things you got through.
- 2:25:20Because no heroes are heroes without
- 2:25:22epic monsters. And the bigger the
- 2:25:24monster, the greater the hero. When I
- 2:25:25was poor, I didn't need motivation. I
- 2:25:27needed someone to give me tactical
- 2:25:28advice. If I could talk to my younger
- 2:25:31poorer self, this is what I would say.
- 2:25:33This is more brutally honest advice to
- 2:25:35my younger poorer self. This advice is
- 2:25:36only for somebody who wants to make more
- 2:25:38money growing their business, growing
- 2:25:40themselves. People obsessed with their
- 2:25:41morning routines make less money than
- 2:25:43people obsessed with making money.
- 2:25:44People [music] work, sacrifice, and then
- 2:25:47they get rich. Then they fill their time
- 2:25:48with weird routines. Then they forget
- 2:25:51how they got rich in the first place.
- 2:25:52And then they tell other people the
- 2:25:54weird routines made them rich rather
- 2:25:56than what they actually did, which is
- 2:25:58whatever it took, not some 3-hour
- 2:26:00morning routine. There was a kid who
- 2:26:02DM'd me who said, "Hey, I've been
- 2:26:05working with this business coach and he
- 2:26:07has me doing a morning routine. Could
- 2:26:09not make this up. After I do my grounded
- 2:26:11walking, I do my gratitude journal. I do
- 2:26:14my [music]
- 2:26:15list for the day. I do my ice plunge."
- 2:26:17He's like, "After I do that, it takes me
- 2:26:18about 3 hours in the morning to get all
- 2:26:20that done." He's like, "I barely have
- 2:26:21any energy to like actually get work
- 2:26:22done." I just said, "I'm going to give
- 2:26:24you the biggest hack in the world. Cut
- 2:26:25the 3-hour morning routine, replace it
- 2:26:26with 3 hours of work, and I promise
- 2:26:27you'll get more done." And he messaged
- 2:26:29me back a week later. He was like,
- 2:26:30"Dude, it changed my whole life. I'm
- 2:26:32getting so much done now." I was like,
- 2:26:33"What a [ __ ] concept. If you work
- 2:26:34more, more gets done." And I love just
- 2:26:36looking at this. It's like, "What
- 2:26:37actions do I have to take to get what I
- 2:26:39want?" Anything that is not that is a
- 2:26:41distraction from it, period. If it takes
- 2:26:43you 5 minutes to feel 20% better, and
- 2:26:45you can actually measure that your
- 2:26:46output goes up by 20%. Then cool, that
- 2:26:48makes sense. So, I'm not I'm not against
- 2:26:50doing things. I'm against doing things
- 2:26:52for the sake of doing them.
- 2:26:55And so one of the biggest issues with
- 2:26:57learning and education as humans do it
- 2:26:59is that we make correlations to things
- 2:27:01that are approximate. They're close to
- 2:27:02one another. Tall people play
- 2:27:04basketball. I should play basketball to
- 2:27:05get tall. We make these very mistaken
- 2:27:07correlations. But we should look at is
- 2:27:09what it took to get there, not what
- 2:27:11they're doing now. So the better advice
- 2:27:12is to look at what someone was doing on
- 2:27:14their way up in the grind. Mirror that
- 2:27:16more than what they're currently doing
- 2:27:18at the top of the mountain. So it would
- 2:27:19be like assuming Warren Buffett is rich
- 2:27:20because he drinks Coke. I drink probably
- 2:27:225 12 oz Cokes a day.
- 2:27:24>> All you have to do also on the corlary
- 2:27:26is are there other people who drink Coke
- 2:27:27who aren't rich? I've had probably 10
- 2:27:29different podcasts seed the premise. Do
- 2:27:32you think that the fact that you had a
- 2:27:33hard childhood has created the success
- 2:27:36today? And I would say no. I would say
- 2:27:39the work that I did created the success
- 2:27:41and all we have to do is look at all the
- 2:27:43other people who had bad childhoods who
- 2:27:46aren't successful. And I think there are
- 2:27:47way more of those than there are that
- 2:27:48are to prove that it actually has
- 2:27:50nothing to do with who's successful.
- 2:27:52There's also people who didn't have bad
- 2:27:53childhoods who are successful, too. And
- 2:27:55[music] so it's just that many people
- 2:27:57have bad childhoods. Some of them become
- 2:28:00successful. And so that's why trying to
- 2:28:01figure out why something happened. I
- 2:28:03have spent less and less of my effort
- 2:28:05trying to do that and only look at what
- 2:28:08actions created a result rather than
- 2:28:11looking at intention or anything else
- 2:28:13that's amorphous that can't be measured.
- 2:28:1630 isn't the new 20. It's an excuse to
- 2:28:19take 10 years longer to accomplish the
- 2:28:20same thing. You can die when you're
- 2:28:22done. Until then, keep going. In your
- 2:28:2420s, you're young. You can [ __ ] around.
- 2:28:27It doesn't matter cuz life is long.
- 2:28:28Number one, that assumes that you're not
- 2:28:30going to die. If you're in your 30s, you
- 2:28:32know someone in your high school class
- 2:28:33who died. And it's not just the drug
- 2:28:34overdose people. It's the people who got
- 2:28:37shot, got in a car accident, had a weird
- 2:28:38brain cancer. I've had all of those
- 2:28:40things happened to people that I went to
- 2:28:41high school with. In one way, I think
- 2:28:43it's a little bit arrogant to assume
- 2:28:44that you're just going to live because
- 2:28:46it means you can waste your life. And I
- 2:28:47I wholeheartedly stand against that. The
- 2:28:49second translation around that that I
- 2:28:51think has hurt a lot of people is that
- 2:28:53they can do what I would consider
- 2:28:55dead-end jobs. And that [music] means
- 2:28:57jobs that don't have any direct
- 2:28:59correlation to your personal growth. Has
- 2:29:01nothing to do with pay. You can work for
- 2:29:03free and grow more than anyone else.
- 2:29:04This is not saying that you need to go
- 2:29:06into a season of earning in your 20s,
- 2:29:08but you do need to be setting yourself
- 2:29:10up for growth. in my opinion, if you
- 2:29:12want the big ultimate outcome. And so
- 2:29:14most people that at least consume my
- 2:29:16stuff, they want to be better. They want
- 2:29:19to grow. They want to get in better
- 2:29:20shape. They want to have better
- 2:29:21relationships. They want to have a
- 2:29:22better business. They want to be, you
- 2:29:23know, bigger in every way. They want to
- 2:29:24expand. If you spend the decade of your
- 2:29:27[music] 20s not growing and not
- 2:29:30investing in your skills and your
- 2:29:31education, if you do that in your 30s,
- 2:29:33you're going to be further behind than
- 2:29:34someone who starts in their 20s. You're
- 2:29:36going to be a decade behind. You know,
- 2:29:37nowadays there's kids who are starting
- 2:29:38out the entrepreneurial journey when
- 2:29:39they're like 13. And so when they're 23,
- 2:29:41they're Mr. Beast. He's young, but he's
- 2:29:44actually pretty old in business terms
- 2:29:46because a lot of people start their
- 2:29:47business journey in their mid-40s. And
- 2:29:48so if they're 50 years old and started
- 2:29:50their business 5 years ago, Mr. Beast
- 2:29:52has twice the amount of time in the ring
- 2:29:54under the bar that they do. For me, I
- 2:29:56want to start my time clock on paying
- 2:29:59down my ignorance debt as fast as
- 2:30:00humanly possible because the debt is a
- 2:30:02constant for everyone. All of us are
- 2:30:03trying to pay down that debt as fast as
- 2:30:05we can. and taking a decade, arguably
- 2:30:07one of the most productive decades of
- 2:30:09your life, and not paying down that
- 2:30:10debt, you just sit in such a deficit
- 2:30:13compared to your peer group. Some people
- 2:30:15might watch this and be 30 or 40 or 50
- 2:30:16and be like, "Well, [ __ ] I took the
- 2:30:18wrong advice from the wrong guy." Guess
- 2:30:20what? You're going to die. It's not
- 2:30:21going to matter anyways. Big deal.
- 2:30:22Whatever. The best time to do this was
- 2:30:24start when you were 10 and get born to
- 2:30:26an entrepreneurial parent who got you in
- 2:30:28their small business and invested in all
- 2:30:29of your education as a homeschooled
- 2:30:31student and taught you all the ways of
- 2:30:32the of the Jedi.
- 2:30:34But you probably didn't have that. And
- 2:30:36so the second best time is to start now
- 2:30:38because let's play out the alternative.
- 2:30:39How much does it serve you to just say,
- 2:30:41I guess I have no chance. Okay, die.
- 2:30:45There's nothing left for me to do. I
- 2:30:47will relinquish the remainder of my
- 2:30:49living days and years because I choose
- 2:30:51to lose. And that's a choice. And if you
- 2:30:53want that, that's cool. The idea of
- 2:30:54quitting simply because you're older,
- 2:30:57because you didn't do something.
- 2:30:58Everybody doesn't do things that they
- 2:31:01know they should be doing now. And
- 2:31:03that's because you're always going to
- 2:31:05know more in the future than you do in
- 2:31:07the past. And so it's a faulty premise
- 2:31:09to say that I'm not going to take action
- 2:31:10today because I didn't know something in
- 2:31:13the past. Everyone doesn't know anything
- 2:31:15in the past. But all you can do is take
- 2:31:16action with what you know today. And by
- 2:31:18taking action, you have learned. And so
- 2:31:20you actually take one step to making
- 2:31:22your first payment on ignorance debt
- 2:31:24through actions, not [music] words. I
- 2:31:26mean, I think a lot of people know the
- 2:31:27story of the 30-year-old barista. If you
- 2:31:29love that, then do it. You know what I
- 2:31:31mean? Like I have no judgment on what
- 2:31:32you do. If you don't love that and you
- 2:31:34wish you were doing something else,
- 2:31:36that's what I would say I have a problem
- 2:31:37with, which is why are you not doing it?
- 2:31:40And I think diving into that, which is
- 2:31:41usually some sort of fear, some sort of
- 2:31:43anxiety, some sort of label that they
- 2:31:45believed that isn't true from someone
- 2:31:47else, and just trying to zone in on like
- 2:31:49why am I not doing it? And taking two
- 2:31:51steps closer to it, not just like
- 2:31:52because I don't know what I'm doing.
- 2:31:53Well, duh. Okay, neither does anyone.
- 2:31:55What are you doing about that? Just
- 2:31:57defining it to what actions am I going
- 2:31:58to take as a result? Just makes life a
- 2:32:00lot easier. What does figured out mean?
- 2:32:01means that I'm going to read 2 hours a
- 2:32:03night on a specific subject until I feel
- 2:32:05like I can make a decision within 30
- 2:32:06days on what I'm going to do. Great.
- 2:32:08That is something I can do and I can
- 2:32:10measure whether I did it or not.
- 2:32:12You have seasons of earning and you have
- 2:32:14seasons of learning. I had this kid who
- 2:32:16reached out. He was 18 years old. Said
- 2:32:17he was going to edit videos for us. When
- 2:32:19he came in, he said, "I want $100,000 a
- 2:32:23year as an editor as a starting [music]
- 2:32:25job." His reasoning was that somebody
- 2:32:28else had offered him that amount of
- 2:32:30money. I want to make this statement
- 2:32:31because I think it's logical and also
- 2:32:33stupid. If you're optimizing for your
- 2:32:35earning potential in your 20s, you're
- 2:32:37missing the [ __ ] point. [music] This
- 2:32:39individual had the potential to be on a
- 2:32:41team that has a massively globally
- 2:32:44recognized [music] brand in terms of
- 2:32:45media and from there learn how to be way
- 2:32:49better than they currently are and then
- 2:32:51become a creative director at another
- 2:32:53company or at one of my portfolio
- 2:32:54companies. like that is the career path
- 2:32:56and instead was comparing that to
- 2:32:58something that he would make $100,000 a
- 2:33:00year and be the only person in the
- 2:33:02department and no one there knew
- 2:33:03anything about media and so he wasn't
- 2:33:05going to [music] learn, he was going to
- 2:33:07earn. Whereas somebody who got into the
- 2:33:10big leagues and learned 10 times the
- 2:33:13skill set then 10 years later is either
- 2:33:15starting a multi-million dollar company
- 2:33:17or heading up a multi-million dollar
- 2:33:19division in a billion dollar company.
- 2:33:21and [music] the potential is so much
- 2:33:22wider because 10 years from now someone
- 2:33:24says what's your experience? It's like
- 2:33:25well I I worked at a real estate firm
- 2:33:27and I made their social media content.
- 2:33:29Who gives a [ __ ] Whereas if you're like
- 2:33:31I worked for one of the biggest media
- 2:33:32companies out there. Everyone will give
- 2:33:34you the job offer. And that is when you
- 2:33:35can choose to earn over learn. But
- 2:33:38people make the trade too soon because
- 2:33:39they compare themselves to people on
- 2:33:41social media [music]
- 2:33:42and think that the 00001% is the norm.
- 2:33:46Whenever you choose to earn rather than
- 2:33:48learn, you're right hooking life and
- 2:33:50saying, "I'm no longer going to develop
- 2:33:51and this is good enough." And so, if a
- 2:33:52$100,000 a year is actually good enough
- 2:33:54for your long-term goals, then do it.
- 2:33:55But I would imagine that it probably
- 2:33:57isn't for what you really want to do
- 2:33:58long term. And I'm using 100, you know,
- 2:34:00six figures as a as a placeholder. It
- 2:34:02can be whatever number you [music] want.
- 2:34:03When you make that decision that you're
- 2:34:04no longer going to learn, that's when
- 2:34:05you stop growing your potential to learn
- 2:34:07more. I say this because that's what I
- 2:34:08did. I had a white collar consulting job
- 2:34:11for defense contracting. I had a top
- 2:34:13secret clearance. I had everything that
- 2:34:14looked good on paper. [music] space,
- 2:34:15cyber intelligence. I had a two to
- 2:34:17threeear path clearly for for getting an
- 2:34:19MBA at an Ivy League school and then
- 2:34:21decided [music] to drop all of that and
- 2:34:23start working for $13 an hour at a gym
- 2:34:25after I graduated Magnum Laui in [music]
- 2:34:273 years from Vanderbilt. I know what I'm
- 2:34:29asking people to do and I'm not asking
- 2:34:30them to do something that I wasn't
- 2:34:32willing [music] to do. And I think that
- 2:34:33I might have even a more extreme version
- 2:34:34that most people are having to live
- 2:34:36with. Trying to say like, well, I can't
- 2:34:37figure out what I want is [music] a
- 2:34:39really paralyzing place to be that I
- 2:34:41think a lot of young people are in. is
- 2:34:43like I want to find my passion. But the
- 2:34:45big misnomer is actually a language
- 2:34:47[music] issue which is that people say
- 2:34:48they want to find their passion rather
- 2:34:49than they want to build it or create it
- 2:34:51or learn it. And so like I can promise
- 2:34:52you that if you're good at something,
- 2:34:53you'll like doing it. And [music] the
- 2:34:54only way that you get good at something
- 2:34:55is by doing things that you suck at and
- 2:34:57doing a lot of it.
- 2:34:59So let's say you make $50,000 a year. It
- 2:35:01cost you $950,000 a year not to know how
- 2:35:05to make a million dollar a year. So how
- 2:35:07much is that education worth? Answer
- 2:35:10[music] the difference. The difference
- 2:35:11between $1 million and $50,000, which is
- 2:35:14$950 grand. If you learn how to make a
- 2:35:17million dollar, the education is worth
- 2:35:19the difference. [music] This is why
- 2:35:20education and information are the most
- 2:35:22valuable things that we can know. Elon
- 2:35:25has like lost everything and then gained
- 2:35:27it back. So many of the best
- 2:35:28entrepreneurs have stories where they
- 2:35:29lost it all and then gained it back. And
- 2:35:31so, how is it that they can go to zero,
- 2:35:32back to a [music] billion, where
- 2:35:34somebody starting at zero can't get
- 2:35:35there because they didn't lose the
- 2:35:36education, they didn't lose the
- 2:35:38learning, they had a bad role. And
- 2:35:40sometimes in business, you do make bets
- 2:35:42on markets and sometimes they don't
- 2:35:43shape up, but you didn't lose. And a lot
- 2:35:46of times you actually gain in experience
- 2:35:48so that the next bet pays off even
- 2:35:50bigger. Everyone gets this wrong. The
- 2:35:52most expensive thing you ever pay for
- 2:35:54isn't your car. It isn't your house. It
- 2:35:56isn't your insurance. It's the
- 2:35:58information that you don't know but
- 2:35:59should. I mean, how many things can you
- 2:36:01think of right now that if you knew 10
- 2:36:03years ago would have materially changed
- 2:36:05your financial outcome, your relational
- 2:36:07outcome, your physical outcomes?
- 2:36:08probably a lot. What is the value of
- 2:36:10that information? Borderline [music]
- 2:36:12priceless. And so the idea that we
- 2:36:14wouldn't invest in paying down that debt
- 2:36:16of ignorance that we owe the universe is
- 2:36:18just because we don't know who we're
- 2:36:20paying the check to every month for the
- 2:36:22things that we don't [music] know that
- 2:36:23we don't value it appropriately. The
- 2:36:25cost of success is the years of feeling
- 2:36:28like an idiot for [music] things that
- 2:36:29you should have known by now. All the
- 2:36:30the decisions that I made up to this
- 2:36:32point led me to here. And I don't regret
- 2:36:33my life, so I don't regret not knowing.
- 2:36:35I mean, if I started over, I'd be
- 2:36:37wealthier than I am now. You know what I
- 2:36:38mean? I can't go back in time, but if I
- 2:36:41could go back in time to talk to my
- 2:36:4320-year-old self, and it wouldn't change
- 2:36:44the outcome of my life now, because I
- 2:36:46would never roll that dice, [music] is I
- 2:36:47would say, "There's two things that you
- 2:36:48don't understand that will massively
- 2:36:50change your life. You don't understand
- 2:36:51brand, and you don't understand
- 2:36:52product." Because I was obsessive in my
- 2:36:5520s on sales and marketing and what I
- 2:36:58would consider fast money. I had fast
- 2:37:00feedback loops. So, I would I'd get
- 2:37:02better at sales and then I'd immediately
- 2:37:03make more sales. I'd get better at
- 2:37:04marketing, immediately make more money.
- 2:37:05And so I had this very fast feedback
- 2:37:07loop that gave me the misinformation or
- 2:37:09the false belief that this was the right
- 2:37:11path. But I was actually just playing
- 2:37:13the wrong game because it's kind of like
- 2:37:15in the Matrix when Neo says to Morpheus,
- 2:37:18"So [music] you're saying when I'm fast
- 2:37:19enough, I'll be able to dodge bullets."
- 2:37:21And he said, "No, I'm saying when you're
- 2:37:22ready, you won't have to." Me being
- 2:37:24obsessive about sales and marketing was
- 2:37:26me trying to get faster and faster in
- 2:37:28[music] the matrix and not being the one
- 2:37:31and seeing the code for what it is,
- 2:37:33which is that if you make a product
- 2:37:34that's good enough, people will do the
- 2:37:36marketing and sales for you. If your
- 2:37:38brand is strong enough, people will make
- 2:37:40the association that they want to buy
- 2:37:42your stuff regardless of how good your
- 2:37:44copy and your headline and your landing
- 2:37:46pages and your conversion rate
- 2:37:47optimization and your media buying are.
- 2:37:49I kept [music] getting really good at a
- 2:37:51game that if I knew how to master the
- 2:37:53big things that mattered would make
- 2:37:54those skills almost irrelevant. When
- 2:37:56$100 million Offers came out the [music]
- 2:37:58book, I didn't make it for anything. I
- 2:37:59made it for me. And it was originally
- 2:38:01intended to be an internal document. And
- 2:38:02so I just wanted to make it exceptional.
- 2:38:03[music] And what happened once I
- 2:38:05released it is what shocked me the most
- 2:38:07was that I posted once and [music] I
- 2:38:09just said, "Hey, I wrote this book. Hope
- 2:38:10you guys like it." And then we sold out
- 2:38:12in minutes. And I was like, "That's
- 2:38:13weird." The next month more copies sold.
- 2:38:14[music] And then the next month more
- 2:38:16copies sold. And then the next month
- 2:38:17more copies sold. and has continued to
- 2:38:18sell more copies month after month after
- 2:38:20month for 2 years and it's still number
- 2:38:22one in its category on Amazon. And that
- 2:38:24was [music] with zero paid marketing
- 2:38:26purely off of people telling people
- 2:38:28about the book. And so when I saw how
- 2:38:30much leverage that was [music] that that
- 2:38:32book sells thousands a day, not dollars,
- 2:38:35thousands of copies a day, I have never
- 2:38:37marketed anything well enough [music] to
- 2:38:38sell a,000 customers a day. Now mind
- 2:38:42you, I've always had more expensive
- 2:38:43stuff that I've sold, but like I'd never
- 2:38:44seen that kind of transaction volume.
- 2:38:46And the only way to get that kind of
- 2:38:47transaction volume is to have a huge
- 2:38:48amount of leverage. The leverage that
- 2:38:50product unlocked for me or that
- 2:38:52understanding was that if you make it
- 2:38:53good enough and I love this saying which
- 2:38:55is there's too big to fail and I love
- 2:38:57the other one which is too good to fail.
- 2:38:59My headline for $100 million offers
- 2:39:02makes no sense. No one knows what $100
- 2:39:03million offers is and it's just like a
- 2:39:05picture of a $100 bill. It's a big
- 2:39:06purple book. Like it actually makes no
- 2:39:08sense. But [music] the contents of the
- 2:39:09book were valuable enough that people
- 2:39:11were like just just read it. And they
- 2:39:13said it so many times to so many people.
- 2:39:14And most people who when I see the
- 2:39:16comments and I see the reviews, they
- 2:39:18say, "I had four different people in the
- 2:39:20same month tell me in different groups
- 2:39:22that I should read this book, so I
- 2:39:24decided to do it even though it looked
- 2:39:25hokey and oh my god, this thing is
- 2:39:26unbelievable." And then they tell 20
- 2:39:28people or 100 people. That was when I
- 2:39:30realized how much leverage spending more
- 2:39:32time upfront on building a better
- 2:39:34product would unlock for me. What I used
- 2:39:36to do was spend two months building a
- 2:39:38good product and spend two years
- 2:39:40marketing that product with great
- 2:39:41marketing rather than spending two years
- 2:39:44on a great product and then for the rest
- 2:39:46of my life not having to spend any
- 2:39:48dollars or effort on marketing so that
- 2:39:50it would sell again and again and again
- 2:39:52because of the quality of the product
- 2:39:54itself. And so that was the first lesson
- 2:39:57that my younger self needed to
- 2:39:58understand about business. And the level
- 2:40:01of detail that it takes to go from good
- 2:40:03to great is so much wider than people
- 2:40:04think it is. The difference between an
- 2:40:06eight and a nine is 10 times the work.
- 2:40:08The difference between nine and nine and
- 2:40:09a half is 10 times the work. [music] The
- 2:40:10difference between nine and a half and
- 2:40:119.75 is another 10 times the work. It's
- 2:40:13so much more effort. And honestly, when
- 2:40:15I was younger, I couldn't even
- 2:40:16comprehend the amount of work that I can
- 2:40:17do now. And for me, that amount of work
- 2:40:19is the amount of unbroken focused time
- 2:40:21that I can stick with one task. I did
- 2:40:23not have that level of focus. I didn't
- 2:40:25have a strong enough no muscle. I didn't
- 2:40:26know how to turn down other things that
- 2:40:28would distract me for long enough. If
- 2:40:30you can count in terms of hundreds, like
- 2:40:31I can promise you if you put a,000 hours
- 2:40:33into something, it'll probably be pretty
- 2:40:35good. And most people spend like a 100
- 2:40:38hours on something or I mean that's
- 2:40:39[ __ ] Most people spend even less than
- 2:40:41time than that. You start a clock when
- 2:40:42you start working. You stop a clock when
- 2:40:44you stop working. You spend 1,000 hours
- 2:40:45or 2,000 hours on something. There's a
- 2:40:47level of detail because of the number of
- 2:40:49exposures you'll get to it. the crispy
- 2:40:51details of the product or the service
- 2:40:54that can only come from looking at that
- 2:40:56thing when it's cold, looking at thing
- 2:40:57when it's hot, looking at it when you're
- 2:40:59angry, looking at it when you're sad,
- 2:41:00looking at it when you're inspired,
- 2:41:01looking at it when you're bored. You see
- 2:41:03it with different lenses and then what
- 2:41:04happens is it just gives you so much
- 2:41:06more depth and context to whatever
- 2:41:08you're trying to build. That that's the
- 2:41:10difference between mediocre products and
- 2:41:11excellent products. And it just takes
- 2:41:12time. Hey, and real quick, I spent 200
- 2:41:14hours this year just making this one
- 2:41:17project for you, which is the $100
- 2:41:19million scaling roadmap. And I broke up
- 2:41:22the stages of business into 10 stages.
- 2:41:24And you can identify where you're at by
- 2:41:26simply just putting in your business
- 2:41:28information. You go to
- 2:41:28acquisition.com/roadmap
- 2:41:30and it'll spit out this custom report
- 2:41:32that tells you what the constraints are
- 2:41:34at that current level and what you need
- 2:41:35to do to graduate and get to the next
- 2:41:37level. This is our gift to you
- 2:41:38absolutely free. on the thank you page.
- 2:41:40You can book a call with our team and
- 2:41:41we'd love to help you uh figure that out
- 2:41:43and ideally get past it. In an ocean of
- 2:41:46volume, which there's more commoditized
- 2:41:48products and [music] services today than
- 2:41:50ever before, there's outsized returns to
- 2:41:52being number one. It is an even bigger
- 2:41:54winner take all market [music] now than
- 2:41:56it ever has been because of social media
- 2:41:58and the ease of letting other people
- 2:41:59know about stuff. If you are truly the
- 2:42:01best, everyone will know. And if
- 2:42:03everyone knows you are the best, you
- 2:42:04will have more demand than you can
- 2:42:05possibly deal with. [music] people think
- 2:42:06that word of mouth is dead when there's
- 2:42:08literally never been an easier way to go
- 2:42:10viral in a literal sense from people
- 2:42:12telling other people about stuff.
- 2:42:15I said the second lesson was brand and
- 2:42:16so I had to look at a company or brand
- 2:42:19[music] as a learning tool as what are
- 2:42:23people going to learn to associate my
- 2:42:25brand with the tangible and the
- 2:42:27intangible ideas. There are many people
- 2:42:30that I associated with when I was
- 2:42:32younger that I would never associate
- 2:42:33with today. [music] Even though I would
- 2:42:34say, "Well, I don't act that way. I
- 2:42:36don't live my life the way they live
- 2:42:37their lives." People would still make
- 2:42:38that association. If I did nothing but
- 2:42:40talk with porn stars on my show, people
- 2:42:42would still make a very different
- 2:42:43association with me. [music] And so, I
- 2:42:46want to embody certain values that I
- 2:42:50want my brand to associate with. And
- 2:42:52anything that is not those things by
- 2:42:54default detracts from it because it
- 2:42:56dilutes the association. Branding is
- 2:42:58like curating a garden where pretty much
- 2:43:00anything but the flower that you're
- 2:43:01trying to grow there is a weed. Even if
- 2:43:03it's a daffodil, even if it's a
- 2:43:05sunflower, even if the flower itself is
- 2:43:07fine, like I said, I have no issues with
- 2:43:08porn. I think it's a sunflower,
- 2:43:09whatever. But if I'm trying to grow
- 2:43:10roses, then anything that's not a rose
- 2:43:12doesn't belong. Being so vigilant about
- 2:43:15defending that garden of association and
- 2:43:18reputation gives you so much leverage.
- 2:43:20Because the reason Warren Buffett now
- 2:43:22can just do deals that no one else can
- 2:43:23do is because his handshake means more
- 2:43:25than the US government's. If he says he
- 2:43:27will pay, we know he [music] will pay.
- 2:43:29If he says he will be there to ensure
- 2:43:31your entire city, we know he will. He
- 2:43:33can do a deal on a one-page agreement
- 2:43:35for billions of dollars because people
- 2:43:38trust and they know that his reputation
- 2:43:39matters more than anything to him.
- 2:43:41[music] And so trust is leverage for
- 2:43:43deals. It's leverage for sales. The
- 2:43:45first experience I had with having a
- 2:43:47strong brand was when we were probably a
- 2:43:50year year and a half into gym launch, I
- 2:43:52launched [music] what would become
- 2:43:53Allen, my software project. And when
- 2:43:55people heard I had launched a new thing,
- 2:43:57the clients that I had were sending
- 2:44:00screenshots of their credit cards to my
- 2:44:02customer support team saying, "I don't
- 2:44:04know what it was, but if Alex made it,
- 2:44:05I'll buy it." And so all of the ideas
- 2:44:08and the obsessions around how I was
- 2:44:10going to market it and how I was going
- 2:44:11to position it. The thing that mattered
- 2:44:12most was what they had already received
- 2:44:15from me and how much I had delivered on
- 2:44:17my first promise. And so when I realized
- 2:44:19that, I was like, "All of this sales and
- 2:44:21marketing stuff gets you one sale.
- 2:44:23[music] delivering exceptional product
- 2:44:24and exceptional reputation around your
- 2:44:26products gets you every other sale after
- 2:44:28that [music] and you will always be able
- 2:44:30to sell the next thing provided you
- 2:44:32delivered on the first thing and that's
- 2:44:34where there's this obsession with
- 2:44:35marketing because there's always more
- 2:44:36people to sell [music] to. It's a very
- 2:44:38in my opinion tiring life. You always
- 2:44:40have to go get new customers. If you
- 2:44:42make sales to get customers rather than
- 2:44:45get customers to make sales, you make
- 2:44:47the customer the goal and then you get
- 2:44:49to keep that relationship and then next
- 2:44:51year you still have that customer. If
- 2:44:52you got a customer just to make a sale,
- 2:44:54you have to go get another customer to
- 2:44:55make another sale next year. But if you
- 2:44:57make a sale to create the relationship
- 2:44:59of the customer, then next year that
- 2:45:00customer will [music] buy again and the
- 2:45:02new customer will buy. And the third
- 2:45:03year you get the first two years and the
- 2:45:05third customer. And then that is how you
- 2:45:07create a compounding vehicle. And so
- 2:45:08both of those things, brand and product,
- 2:45:10are actually underlying one concept now
- 2:45:13that I'm saying it out loud, which is I
- 2:45:14didn't understand compounding. I thought
- 2:45:17that it was normal to have to go out,
- 2:45:18bang doors, call phones, DM, run ads to
- 2:45:21get customers every single month and
- 2:45:23that next month I'm [music] going to
- 2:45:24have to get another 20 just to keep the
- 2:45:26lights on rather than having spent more
- 2:45:28time on my reputation and the quality of
- 2:45:30my product so that [music] when I sold
- 2:45:32the first hundred, they would never
- 2:45:33leave again. And then they would send me
- 2:45:35the next hundred and I wouldn't have to
- 2:45:36do anything. And then I would be able to
- 2:45:38fend people off and then I'd be able to
- 2:45:39raise my prices and be able to take
- 2:45:41people on my terms. But I didn't
- 2:45:42understand any of that. And part of that
- 2:45:44is because I wanted money so fast.
- 2:45:46[music] And building a great product
- 2:45:47takes longer. Building a great
- 2:45:49reputation literally never stops until
- 2:45:50the day you die. Leaning into that
- 2:45:52lesson, you know, the first book I
- 2:45:54launched and I think it did 2 or 4,000
- 2:45:57copies sold its first month, something
- 2:45:58like that. You know, the second book
- 2:46:00that launched 2 years later, sold
- 2:46:01250,000 [music] copies in its first
- 2:46:03month, which for context, the average
- 2:46:05New York Times bestseller sells between
- 2:46:0610 and 100,000 [music] in its first 12
- 2:46:08months. And we sold 250 in the first
- 2:46:10month. The only way that that can happen
- 2:46:12is if [music] the people who bought the
- 2:46:13first book buy the second book and
- 2:46:15everybody they tell also buy and that
- 2:46:18book still continues to sell at twice
- 2:46:19the rate of my first book today.
- 2:46:22Here's how to spot friends that are
- 2:46:24worth cutting. They only talk about your
- 2:46:26past, not your future. So, if you go and
- 2:46:29you hang out with your buddies and all
- 2:46:30they can really reminisce with you on is
- 2:46:32the things that you did together, but
- 2:46:34none of them are talking about what
- 2:46:35they're going to do or what you're going
- 2:46:36to do. For me, that's a telltale sign
- 2:46:38that they're living in the [music] past.
- 2:46:39They're not even living in the present.
- 2:46:40Their best years are behind them. And
- 2:46:42for most of us, we want our best years
- 2:46:44to be ahead of us. And we want somebody
- 2:46:45who's also looking at the same goal as
- 2:46:47us, which is growth, [music] which is
- 2:46:48moving forward, which is making
- 2:46:49progress. If you are a growth oriented
- 2:46:51individual and you feel like you're not
- 2:46:53sure about your environment or if it's
- 2:46:55conducive, the easiest limit test is who
- 2:46:58talks about the future [music]
- 2:46:59and who talks about the past. Keep the
- 2:47:01ones who only talk about the future. Cut
- 2:47:03the ones talking about the past. The
- 2:47:04best thing that I ever did was not
- 2:47:06listen to other people's opinions about
- 2:47:08my life. They don't want the best
- 2:47:10version of you. They want the version of
- 2:47:11you who best serves them. Now, when I
- 2:47:14first said this, I got flack from a
- 2:47:16bunch of parents. [music] They're like,
- 2:47:18I really want the best for my kids. I
- 2:47:20was like, that's not true. [music] You
- 2:47:22want a version of your children who
- 2:47:25serves what you think will make you look
- 2:47:27the best. Family, I would say more often
- 2:47:30than not, has a closer alignment with
- 2:47:32your long-term goals than [music]
- 2:47:33strangers do. And so it makes sense that
- 2:47:36family would have more aligned interests
- 2:47:38but not completely aligned interests
- 2:47:39with you because the only person who has
- 2:47:41a completely aligned interest with you
- 2:47:42is future you. Keeping that as the limus
- 2:47:44test of whose opinion I'm going to
- 2:47:45listen to although it's more difficult
- 2:47:47has ultimately been very fruitful for me
- 2:47:49because if you're looking at two even
- 2:47:51two parents you can disprove that
- 2:47:52concept by saying okay well both parents
- 2:47:54want different things from me of the
- 2:47:56things that both parents want. Which of
- 2:47:57the [music] things help each of the
- 2:47:59parents individually out? Cuz I can
- 2:48:00promise you that the thing that one
- 2:48:01parent wants doesn't hurt them and help
- 2:48:03the other parent. if they disagree, it's
- 2:48:05usually something that's more aligned
- 2:48:06with their worldview, their beliefs, or
- 2:48:08what they will get status from in their
- 2:48:10community for you doing. And so, all of
- 2:48:12the things I just described have nothing
- 2:48:14to do with you. So, why consider it?
- 2:48:16I'll say this upfront. I hate why
- 2:48:17questions cuz who knows why? But I would
- 2:48:19say that I if if I had to make a guess
- 2:48:21on why we care about other people's
- 2:48:23opinions, it's because we've learned to
- 2:48:24care about other people's opinions.
- 2:48:26[music] And when we're children, we
- 2:48:27learn to orient ourselves to the world
- 2:48:29through other people telling us what is
- 2:48:31what. Literally, when you're a kid, you
- 2:48:33point and [music] then you say, "Well,
- 2:48:34what's that?" And then they say this.
- 2:48:37And so, you have to listen to other
- 2:48:39people on the way up. The problem is at
- 2:48:41some point you have to turn it off and
- 2:48:42say, you know, some of the people I was
- 2:48:44listening to had no idea what they were
- 2:48:45saying. But you don't know they have no
- 2:48:46idea because you don't have a context or
- 2:48:47make a judgment. You have to learn to
- 2:48:49become human and then you have to learn
- 2:48:50to become yourself. And I think that at
- 2:48:52that turning point, you then have to
- 2:48:54analyze the beliefs that you've been
- 2:48:55given and then keep the ones that you
- 2:48:57choose. Most parents are riskaverse
- 2:49:00rather than risk-taking for their
- 2:49:02children. So like we are willing to take
- 2:49:04more risk for ourselves often times than
- 2:49:05our parents are willing to take on our
- 2:49:06behalf. And I think that's normal. They
- 2:49:07want to like keep you alive. There's a
- 2:49:08lot of evolutionary drive behind that.
- 2:49:10And so they're playing not to lose. But
- 2:49:11if you want to play to win, then you
- 2:49:13have to take different bets. I think a
- 2:49:14lot of younger people get really
- 2:49:15confused because they spend a lot of
- 2:49:16time talking about ideas and very little
- 2:49:18talking doing actions. And so if you
- 2:49:21just define the world by only things
- 2:49:23that occur in it and not things that
- 2:49:25occur in your mind, there's a lot less
- 2:49:27noise. And so it becomes easier to see
- 2:49:29the forest of the trees. Let's say I
- 2:49:31have an employee and I want to hop
- 2:49:32[music] on a one-on-one and they said
- 2:49:34something in a meeting before and I say,
- 2:49:35"I think the intention behind your
- 2:49:37statement was that you wanted me to do
- 2:49:39this and this is how I was feeling about
- 2:49:42your statement and this is probably
- 2:49:43where you were feeling. Everything I
- 2:49:45just said is a complete waste of time
- 2:49:46because all I know is that they said
- 2:49:48this." And [music] so just focus on the
- 2:49:49facts. And if you can do that, it
- 2:49:52actually makes living life a lot easier
- 2:49:53or navigating life a lot easier. At
- 2:49:55least it has for me because those are
- 2:49:57the only objective truths. An easy
- 2:49:59[music] frame for that is like, would it
- 2:50:00be admitted to a court as evidence? You
- 2:50:03saying you were offended is not
- 2:50:04evidence. John said this to Sally, these
- 2:50:07words, that's evidence. Indisputable.
- 2:50:09And so just look at the things that are
- 2:50:10beyond reproach. Look at the things that
- 2:50:11are indisputable. Look at the things
- 2:50:12that are facts that are observable. And
- 2:50:14the world gets a lot quieter. And you
- 2:50:16also realize that most people are full
- 2:50:17of [ __ ] and don't know what they're
- 2:50:18talking about. I mean, if someone was
- 2:50:20like, "Hey, Alex, why did you get into
- 2:50:22business?" I could make up an answer. It
- 2:50:23just how do we know it's true? Trying to
- 2:50:25figure out someone's intention is
- 2:50:26[ __ ] If someone [music] asked me,
- 2:50:28"Why did you get into business?" I can
- 2:50:30make up an answer. Anyone can make up an
- 2:50:32answer. Why do you like making money?
- 2:50:34Why do you like sales? Why do you like
- 2:50:35marketing? Why are you good at this? I
- 2:50:37can make up any answer. All I know is
- 2:50:39that these things have [music] occurred.
- 2:50:41And so we can look at my actions and we
- 2:50:43can look at the results. The rest of it
- 2:50:45of which which had what influence on
- 2:50:47what like I can't relive my life and I
- 2:50:48can't run the experiment. And so trying
- 2:50:50to determine why like was it because my
- 2:50:51mom didn't hug me? Was it because my dad
- 2:50:53hugged me too hard? Who knows? I can
- 2:50:54give anyone and someone will nod and say
- 2:50:56great because we've trained ourselves to
- 2:50:57say to answer when someone says why do
- 2:50:59you do that? You give them words and
- 2:51:00[music] they nod and say oh that's
- 2:51:01interesting but like it doesn't mean
- 2:51:02it's true. And so I just try and skirt
- 2:51:04the whole conversation because [music]
- 2:51:06there's no point. So when someone's
- 2:51:07like, "Well, I'm the type of person who
- 2:51:09I'm like, just stop." Then they start
- 2:51:11[music] using this label to decide
- 2:51:13whether or why they can or can't do
- 2:51:15something. I wouldn't be successful with
- 2:51:17that cuz I'm a knee freak. Why? Because
- 2:51:19[music] you take trash out of your car
- 2:51:20regularly. Why does that have anything
- 2:51:22to do with whether you could do this or
- 2:51:23not? I used to think and told [music]
- 2:51:25people I was bad at math until I was 25.
- 2:51:28Post college, postconulting job, all of
- 2:51:30it. And then I decided [music] that I
- 2:51:31was not going to be bad at math. And so
- 2:51:33I was like, "Okay, well, I'm not going
- 2:51:34to use a calculator." And so then I
- 2:51:36started getting better and better at
- 2:51:37doing math problems. And then lo and
- 2:51:39behold, uh when I took the GMAT, I was
- 2:51:41like, "Okay, I have to study twice as
- 2:51:42hard for the math section." And I did
- 2:51:44just as well in the math section as I
- 2:51:45did on my verbal. [music] But my whole
- 2:51:47life, I had said I was bad at math. And
- 2:51:49so I didn't study as hard because I was
- 2:51:51bad at it. Everyone who's listening to
- 2:51:52this has something they say about
- 2:51:54themselves. They're like, "I'm not
- 2:51:55organized. I'm an early bird." [music]
- 2:51:57Right? Like we have these labels we give
- 2:51:58ourselves, but like why do we have these
- 2:52:00labels? Like if you needed to wake up
- 2:52:01early, you [ __ ] wake up early. If you
- 2:52:02need to stay up late, you stay up
- 2:52:03[music] late. The labels change our
- 2:52:05behavior more than we change the labels.
- 2:52:06I really abhore labels overall because I
- 2:52:08feel like it limits my action. When I
- 2:52:10get on podcasts and I have talks and
- 2:52:12people try and label me, you'll probably
- 2:52:14actively see me break the label almost
- 2:52:16every time because I'm really aware
- 2:52:17[music] of it. And a lot of people
- 2:52:19aren't. And I don't think people do it
- 2:52:20on purpose in a bad way. I just think
- 2:52:22that they will speak things over you
- 2:52:24which is why I hate going home because
- 2:52:25[music] no one speaks [ __ ] over you more
- 2:52:27than your family and the people who knew
- 2:52:28you in high school. Alex has always had
- 2:52:29a short temper. You You're a hotthead.
- 2:52:31Literally people from home describe me
- 2:52:33that way. I was like I don't think I'm a
- 2:52:34hotthehead. They will say that and then
- 2:52:36I feel like I have to really put up my
- 2:52:38mental like defenses to be like this is
- 2:52:40not true. Here's the [music] evidence
- 2:52:41that this is not true. What would a
- 2:52:43hotthead do in these scenarios that is
- 2:52:44not the way I behaved therefore right?
- 2:52:46And I have to I have to basically unwind
- 2:52:48that [ __ ] whenever [music] I go there.
- 2:52:50And so that is why I've been an advocate
- 2:52:52of like if you want to change your
- 2:52:53behavior, change your environment
- 2:52:53because they're not going to reinforce
- 2:52:54labels that you then also perpetuate in
- 2:52:57your own mind by the actions you take as
- 2:52:58a result. [music] And the only reason
- 2:53:00they want a label is because it's
- 2:53:01shorthand for other people to
- 2:53:02understand, not because it's true. They
- 2:53:04just want to say he had a bad childhood.
- 2:53:05And so they [music] take your whole life
- 2:53:06and they just say bad. That's not true.
- 2:53:08There's more nuance to it. I prefer to
- 2:53:10think of ideals and think of taking
- 2:53:12steps towards those ideals. And since
- 2:53:13ideals are not binary of like he is
- 2:53:15courageous or he is not courageous, but
- 2:53:16how courageous is he [music] or how
- 2:53:18patient is he? Not impatient or patient,
- 2:53:20but how much. Then I know the values
- 2:53:22that I want to embody and then I [music]
- 2:53:24just take steps towards those every day
- 2:53:26with the actions I take. My success can
- 2:53:28be boiled down to elimination of
- 2:53:29distractions, getting started, getting
- 2:53:31better, and never stopping. Here's how
- 2:53:33to do that. There's four steps.
- 2:53:35Eliminate distractions, get started, get
- 2:53:37better, never stop. Number one,
- 2:53:39elimination of the things [music] that
- 2:53:40are distracting you. When I was young,
- 2:53:42my father gave me this advice. Rich
- 2:53:44people buy time. Poor people buy stuff.
- 2:53:48Ambitious people buy skills. Lazy people
- 2:53:51buy distraction. I can give you the
- 2:53:53first and easiest 2025 prediction. Look
- 2:53:56at what you spend money on. Look at your
- 2:53:58calendar. And wherever you invest is
- 2:54:00what you will get more of. So many
- 2:54:02people are surprised when they look at
- 2:54:04their bank account next year and it's
- 2:54:06lower than they want it to be. They look
- 2:54:08at their accomplishments from that year
- 2:54:10and it's not the things they set out to
- 2:54:11do. But when you look at their calendar
- 2:54:13and their credit card expenses, it's
- 2:54:15very obvious why those things didn't
- 2:54:16happen. Because we vote with our dollars
- 2:54:18about the things that we care about. We
- 2:54:20vote about the type of person that we
- 2:54:21want to become. And as the first thing
- 2:54:23that you can do today for next year is
- 2:54:26actually comment below this video. And I
- 2:54:28rarely ask for this. The thing that
- 2:54:29you're actually going to do today, not
- 2:54:32what you're going to begin doing next
- 2:54:33year or what your resolution is going to
- 2:54:35be. But if it's important enough to do
- 2:54:36for future you, it's certainly important
- 2:54:39enough to do for current you. Because
- 2:54:40current you, by the way, is the only you
- 2:54:42that's ever going to enjoy life. I'll
- 2:54:44give you this story. So I remember when
- 2:54:46I was a few years back, I was walking
- 2:54:48with Ila and we went to Sephora, which
- 2:54:50is like a makeup store. So, we walked
- 2:54:51inside, you know, I'm sitting, you know,
- 2:54:53standing there awkwardly cuz I'm like, I
- 2:54:54don't know what I'm supposed to do here.
- 2:54:55There's this lady with the smock who
- 2:54:57like helps out and she had these two
- 2:54:59girls who were young. They must have
- 2:55:00been maybe well about this this old. I'm
- 2:55:02guessing between 9 and 40, who knows?
- 2:55:05She's leaning over and she has these two
- 2:55:06paint brushes in her hands and she says,
- 2:55:09"Okay, girls, now that you guys are
- 2:55:11women, you need to start budgeting for
- 2:55:13this stuff because you're going to be
- 2:55:14spending money on this every single
- 2:55:15month to do your makeup." And so, the
- 2:55:17girls grabbed them. They were super
- 2:55:18excited and they went to go check out.
- 2:55:19And I saw that exchange as actually a
- 2:55:22really beautiful lesson when it comes to
- 2:55:24identity. Our priorities we dictate by
- 2:55:27what we spend, not by what we say. These
- 2:55:30girls, because they wanted to step into
- 2:55:31this new identity, had to match it with
- 2:55:33new priorities. So they had money or
- 2:55:36they had saved up their shekels or
- 2:55:37whatever they do for chores or
- 2:55:38babysitting or whatever. By doing that,
- 2:55:40they had to start prioritizing some of
- 2:55:42that money towards their new identity
- 2:55:44from girls to women. But the thing is is
- 2:55:46that many people who want to start next
- 2:55:48year think okay well I'm just going to
- 2:55:50see if this happens. But it doesn't work
- 2:55:52that way. You have to basically make the
- 2:55:54decision that this is the type of person
- 2:55:56that I want to become. And then these
- 2:55:58are the actions that that type of person
- 2:56:00would take and then we align our
- 2:56:02calendars and our budgets in accordance
- 2:56:04with that so that the investments we
- 2:56:06make yield the results that we want. But
- 2:56:08the thing is is that people want to say,
- 2:56:10"Hey, wouldn't it be great if I owned
- 2:56:12Apple?" But they never buy the stock. If
- 2:56:13you want to be that version of you, you
- 2:56:15need to start buying stock in that
- 2:56:16today. Both by paying in time and paying
- 2:56:19in money to vote with your dollars about
- 2:56:20what you truly care about. And the
- 2:56:22reason that I'm hitting this so hard is
- 2:56:24that it's never been easier than it is
- 2:56:26today to be successful. It's also never
- 2:56:29been easier to be distracted. So along
- 2:56:31the theme of investing in the things
- 2:56:33that matter most, the first thing we do
- 2:56:35is we eliminate all the stuff that
- 2:56:37sucks. I define commitment as the
- 2:56:39elimination of alternatives. If you get
- 2:56:41married, you eliminate all people of
- 2:56:43whatever sex you're married to that are
- 2:56:44not that person. Actually, you eliminate
- 2:56:46everyone who's not that person
- 2:56:47independent of sex, right? That is a
- 2:56:49commitment, right? If you enter into a
- 2:56:51uh partnership and you say, "I'm not
- 2:56:53going to do any business besides this
- 2:56:54business as part of the terms," then
- 2:56:56you've eliminated all alternatives. And
- 2:56:58so, if you want someone to commit, ask
- 2:57:00them to eliminate everything else that's
- 2:57:01not the main thing. These are all the
- 2:57:03things, a laundry list of things that
- 2:57:05are probably not your main thing that
- 2:57:07very likely are getting in the way. And
- 2:57:09these are the most common things that I
- 2:57:10see in my DMs, that I see in my comments
- 2:57:13from people who are not getting where
- 2:57:14they want to go as fast as they'd like
- 2:57:16to get there. First big category is bad
- 2:57:19friends. So if you want better friends,
- 2:57:21get used to seeing them less. Better
- 2:57:24friends are busy friends. So I remember
- 2:57:26when I started working more and some of
- 2:57:30the friends that I had were a little bit
- 2:57:31more ambitious, I started realizing that
- 2:57:34the people that I liked the most, I
- 2:57:35actually didn't spend as much time with.
- 2:57:37and the people that were always
- 2:57:38available were the ones that I didn't
- 2:57:40want to become more like. Here's five
- 2:57:42questions you should consider when
- 2:57:44thinking about whether to keep a friend
- 2:57:46in your life or cut them. Question
- 2:57:48number one is, if someone told you that
- 2:57:50you're a lot like your friend, would you
- 2:57:52take that as a compliment? Second, are
- 2:57:55you truly fulfilled by the friendship or
- 2:57:58is it just someone to keep you from
- 2:57:59being lonely? Third, are you able to be
- 2:58:02unapologetically yourself or do you feel
- 2:58:05the need to act differently to please
- 2:58:07that friend or to be around that friend?
- 2:58:09Fourth, do you like who this friend is
- 2:58:13right now today or do you like the idea
- 2:58:16of the friend and who they could be
- 2:58:18someday? And then finally, five, would
- 2:58:21you want your future or imagined child
- 2:58:24to be friends with someone like this
- 2:58:26person? And I think it's a really
- 2:58:28wonderful lipmus test because it forces
- 2:58:30you to take a look outside of yourself
- 2:58:32in order to have perspective from a
- 2:58:34third-party angle on the true quality of
- 2:58:37that person. But the reality is that
- 2:58:39rare people are by definition rare. It's
- 2:58:42normal to have fewer of them. And so if
- 2:58:45you only have a few friends or one good
- 2:58:47friend, then that's normal if you want
- 2:58:51rare and exceptional friends. If you
- 2:58:53have many friends, it's far more likely
- 2:58:55that the bar for your friendship is too
- 2:58:58low. And to give you a filter that I
- 2:59:00actually used for the most important
- 2:59:01friend in my life, Leila, I like to
- 2:59:03think, does this person have the same
- 2:59:05scale of goals that I have? So, it
- 2:59:07doesn't mean that they have to have the
- 2:59:09same goals as you, but it has to be the
- 2:59:11same level of goals as you because at
- 2:59:13least you're going in the same
- 2:59:14direction. So, that's number one. Number
- 2:59:16two is, do they have the same level of
- 2:59:18dedication and commitment to those
- 2:59:20goals? Because I don't know about you,
- 2:59:21but I had plenty of friends who were
- 2:59:22like, I want to be an NFL player. I want
- 2:59:25to be a really rich tech entrepreneur. I
- 2:59:27want to be a a touring musician, right?
- 2:59:30And they had these goals, but I'm like,
- 2:59:31dude, I see you just playing Fortnite 4
- 2:59:33hours a day and you you practice guitar
- 2:59:35once a week. Like, what do you really
- 2:59:37want that or do you just like saying it
- 2:59:38because it makes you feel good? And so,
- 2:59:40I wanted people who walked the walk. And
- 2:59:43I wanted people who would keep up with
- 2:59:45my pace. And if you are someone who's
- 2:59:47ambitious, and this is me just talking
- 2:59:49specifically to you, because there's
- 2:59:50only a few people who are watching this
- 2:59:51who really are, and you'll know that if
- 2:59:53it's you, you have to get used to being
- 2:59:55alone because there are seasons where
- 2:59:57you'll basically transition from one
- 2:59:59group of friends into another. And it's
- 3:00:01not even a group of you'll usually
- 3:00:02transition from a group of friends into
- 3:00:04no friends. And then you'll find one or
- 3:00:06two people who are at a new level. And
- 3:00:08then sometimes those people introduce
- 3:00:09you to some of their friends. And if you
- 3:00:10keep walking and you keep outpacing,
- 3:00:13then that group will then start retiring
- 3:00:15past you. and then maybe one person
- 3:00:17stays with you, maybe no one does, and
- 3:00:18you'll have another lonely period. I'm
- 3:00:20saying this because I used to think that
- 3:00:22there was something wrong with me when
- 3:00:24in reality I just didn't understand what
- 3:00:27the nature of being exceptional meant.
- 3:00:29And so I'm saying this purely from a
- 3:00:32definitional perspective. To be
- 3:00:34exceptional means that you are the
- 3:00:36exception. It means that you are not
- 3:00:38normal. And so it's normal for normal
- 3:00:41people to find you abnormal if you do
- 3:00:44things that are not normal. Don't let
- 3:00:46people who have mediocre goals deter you
- 3:00:50from taking actions that make you great
- 3:00:53because it makes you different.
- 3:00:54Realizing that I thought most people
- 3:00:56actually made no sense. They say they
- 3:00:58had these goals, but they took no
- 3:00:59action. And they called me work
- 3:01:01obsessed. They would tell me I should
- 3:01:02take time off and they're like, "Hey,
- 3:01:04you're not you're not you're not as cool
- 3:01:05anymore. You're not you're not hanging
- 3:01:06out with the boys. It's like why aren't
- 3:01:08you participating in the fantasy league?
- 3:01:09Why aren't you watching football on
- 3:01:10Sunday with us? And for me, I actually
- 3:01:12used to love watching football uh with
- 3:01:14my friends. It was actually one of my
- 3:01:15biggest things that I look forward to.
- 3:01:16But the thing is is that like I needed
- 3:01:18that Sunday cuz I had to prep workouts.
- 3:01:19I had to prep the music list for the
- 3:01:21next day. I had to run billing. I had to
- 3:01:22do all this other work. And the thing is
- 3:01:25is that like I looked at that football
- 3:01:27game and I was like my goals are more
- 3:01:29important to me than this. And so I
- 3:01:30think that a lot of people don't
- 3:01:31actually look at themselves in the
- 3:01:33mirror and say like one year from today
- 3:01:34will I will I remember this football
- 3:01:37game or will I remember the fact that
- 3:01:39I'm not where I said I wanted to be. And
- 3:01:41to me that was significantly more
- 3:01:43painful. Now this is an uncomfortable
- 3:01:46fact for a lot of people. Your ability
- 3:01:49to delay gratification is actually a
- 3:01:51function of intelligence. And so your
- 3:01:54ability to learn at a longer and longer
- 3:01:56delay is something that comes I mean
- 3:01:57we're talking from primates all the way
- 3:01:59up. And so basically if you want to
- 3:02:02teach a monkey how to do something you
- 3:02:04have to say hey do this thing and then
- 3:02:06immediately give them a reward. And the
- 3:02:07longer that period goes on the less
- 3:02:10trainable they are. The sign of
- 3:02:11intelligence is that you can actually
- 3:02:13expand the reinforcement window and they
- 3:02:14can still abstract it back to the
- 3:02:17original action. If you want to practice
- 3:02:20intelligence, then being able to
- 3:02:22actively delay your need for a result or
- 3:02:26reward from the work you do will make
- 3:02:29you a more intelligent person because
- 3:02:31your rate of learning will actually
- 3:02:34increase despite the fact that your
- 3:02:36reward rate will decrease in the short
- 3:02:39term. And so to give you full
- 3:02:41transparency on what 2025 might look
- 3:02:43like if you accomplish your goals at the
- 3:02:45end, you might have a different friend
- 3:02:47group or no friends at all for a season
- 3:02:50because you don't become like the people
- 3:02:52you admire. You become like the people
- 3:02:54you want to impress. Harvard made this,
- 3:02:57you know, wonderful study years ago
- 3:02:58about the best predictor of someone's
- 3:03:01long-term material success was what they
- 3:03:03called their reference group. Now, this
- 3:03:05has been misqued in places by the five
- 3:03:07people you spend the most time with, but
- 3:03:09it's actually the five people you
- 3:03:10compare yourself to, and that's a very
- 3:03:12big difference. Now, I want to take it a
- 3:03:14step further because I think to myself,
- 3:03:16what are the things that affect our
- 3:03:18behavior? And so, it's really about the
- 3:03:21people that you want to impress, not
- 3:03:23necessarily even who you compare
- 3:03:25yourself to, because it's the people
- 3:03:27whose voices you hear when you're about
- 3:03:29to make a big life decision. And so when
- 3:03:32you make a big life decision, you don't
- 3:03:34listen to the people closest to you. You
- 3:03:37should listen to the people closest to
- 3:03:38your goals. And some of them may not be
- 3:03:40in your neighborhood or your city or
- 3:03:42your state or your high school or your
- 3:03:44college. They might just be people you
- 3:03:46follow on the internet. And you have to
- 3:03:47abstract what would that person think
- 3:03:50about this decision? Not my mom, not my
- 3:03:53homie, not my uncle, or that person at
- 3:03:56church. And so I think this is a great
- 3:03:58transition of thinking through instead
- 3:03:59of necessarily even having mentors,
- 3:04:01having heroes and transposing what you
- 3:04:04think their decision-making calculus
- 3:04:06would be onto your life. And so it's
- 3:04:09interesting is that I will have
- 3:04:10conversations with entrepreneurs and
- 3:04:12they'll say, "Hey, here's my current
- 3:04:13condition. This is my desired state.
- 3:04:15This is what I perceive my obstacle to
- 3:04:17be." And I say, "Okay, well, what do you
- 3:04:19think?" And they're like, "Well, I think
- 3:04:20you're going to say I should do X, Y,
- 3:04:21and Z." And I'm like, "You're right. Why
- 3:04:23aren't you?" They're like, "Well," and
- 3:04:26the thing is is that basically what they
- 3:04:28answer with after that well is in
- 3:04:31essence other people's opinion who
- 3:04:33aren't at the place they want to be.
- 3:04:35Here's the the uncomfortable truth,
- 3:04:36which is that winners focus on winning.
- 3:04:39Losers focus on winners. And you never
- 3:04:41receive hate from above, always below,
- 3:04:44because winners have their eyes on the
- 3:04:46goal, not on other people. And so, you
- 3:04:48have to decide whether you want to be a
- 3:04:49loser or a winner. And I'm just being
- 3:04:51real with you. What this looks like in
- 3:04:53reality and maybe for you in 2025 will
- 3:04:56be like this. First, you look like an
- 3:04:58idiot to everyone else while you try to
- 3:05:00figure it out. Then everyone else looks
- 3:05:03like an idiot for ever doubting you.
- 3:05:05Seasons. And so, everyone takes a
- 3:05:07different amount of years to stop giving
- 3:05:09a [ __ ] about what everyone else thinks.
- 3:05:12And if you're going to get there
- 3:05:13eventually, you might as well start
- 3:05:14today and enjoy the benefits longer. So,
- 3:05:17if I'm 85 years old, I think about what
- 3:05:20that man cares about. And that man cares
- 3:05:22about very, very little. All you have to
- 3:05:25do is talk to an elderly person or a
- 3:05:27grandparent and be like, what do you
- 3:05:28think about this? A lot of like, ah, who
- 3:05:30cares? Like, it doesn't matter. Life is
- 3:05:32literally too short. They literally
- 3:05:34don't have time for it. And so I think
- 3:05:36to myself, if that's the ultimate
- 3:05:38version of me, if I'm going to get there
- 3:05:40eventually, and that's what the wisest
- 3:05:42people think after having the most life
- 3:05:44experience, then why would I not try to
- 3:05:46cheat code that into today and then not
- 3:05:49have to go looking back from 85 and
- 3:05:51think, man, I wish I knew then what I
- 3:05:53know now. Look forward to 85year-old
- 3:05:55self and say, I am going to choose to
- 3:05:58learn the lesson I know I'm going to
- 3:05:59learn and act as if I knew it today.
- 3:06:01Because the difference between them and
- 3:06:03you is that what they consider work, you
- 3:06:08consider life. And so you have to accept
- 3:06:10that you have a fundamental different
- 3:06:11understanding of how life works. And I
- 3:06:15believe that is a more accurate view of
- 3:06:17reality. The reason that the rich can
- 3:06:19get richer is because they see the world
- 3:06:21differently than the poor. And so it
- 3:06:23makes sense that if your poor friends
- 3:06:25don't see what you see, that they see
- 3:06:27through the lens of poverty. And all my
- 3:06:30goal in life is to be able to see
- 3:06:31reality more accurately. And so in the
- 3:06:34beginning, you have to develop this
- 3:06:35armor, this thick skin around people
- 3:06:37saying those little snide comments of
- 3:06:39like, you work too hard, you're too
- 3:06:41obsessed, you have a toxic work
- 3:06:43capacity, and why are you working
- 3:06:45weekends? Why are you working late
- 3:06:47nights? You're you're not like this is
- 3:06:48not worth it. They're not paying you
- 3:06:50enough for the work that you do. All of
- 3:06:52these different things. Because
- 3:06:53eventually that armor on the outside
- 3:06:56actually just becomes one with you. And
- 3:06:59you don't even hear it anymore because I
- 3:07:01can promise you that those people who
- 3:07:03were in my life decades ago. They're
- 3:07:05just not even I don't hear those those
- 3:07:08claims anymore for two reasons. One,
- 3:07:10because my reality changed so
- 3:07:12drastically that they couldn't say
- 3:07:14anything. And secondarily, they're just
- 3:07:16not in my world anymore. I was only able
- 3:07:19to get here because what they deemed
- 3:07:21acceptable, I deemed intolerable. how
- 3:07:24far you go in life. I truly believe this
- 3:07:28is based and predicated only on one
- 3:07:30thing which is your actual standard. And
- 3:07:33so I believe that the person who runs
- 3:07:35any company or runs any division should
- 3:07:37be the person who has the highest
- 3:07:39standards. And if there's ever a day
- 3:07:40that someone has a higher standard for
- 3:07:42acquisition.com than me, they should run
- 3:07:44this instead of me because they would be
- 3:07:46the one who's best serving the company.
- 3:07:48And so the person who should have the
- 3:07:50highest standard for you is you. And so
- 3:07:53it makes sense that they have a lower
- 3:07:54bar, but why would I listen to their bar
- 3:07:56on my life? I think that that standard
- 3:07:59is the one thing that rich kids get from
- 3:08:02rich parents more than anything else is
- 3:08:05because they have an expectation of
- 3:08:08life. They don't accept opportunities
- 3:08:11that are below that standard. And so
- 3:08:13they actually get their huge leg up on
- 3:08:16the pick on the vehicles that they
- 3:08:18choose to pursue. And so one of the
- 3:08:20tougher parts if you're not from an area
- 3:08:22where people make a lot of money or not
- 3:08:23from you don't know anybody who's a you
- 3:08:25know super successful entrepreneur is
- 3:08:27that you basically have to borrow
- 3:08:28someone else's measuring stick and you
- 3:08:30have to say is this the standard that
- 3:08:32Elon would pursue? Is this the standard
- 3:08:35Bezos would pursue? Is this the standard
- 3:08:37Jobs would pursue? And if it isn't then
- 3:08:40why are you doing it? If you want to be
- 3:08:42like them then act like them. If you
- 3:08:44want to be like your friends, then you
- 3:08:46can act like your friends, but don't be
- 3:08:47surprised that you have what they have
- 3:08:49or lack what they lack. If we're
- 3:08:51thinking about elimination, we're
- 3:08:52eliminating bad friends and tangentially
- 3:08:54their opinions about you that are
- 3:08:56affecting your behavior. So the next
- 3:08:58thing are what things are playing
- 3:08:59interference on your time and your
- 3:09:01attention. All right. So I would say
- 3:09:03opinions of other people are affecting
- 3:09:04your behavior and your decisions. I
- 3:09:06think that your environment affects your
- 3:09:09efficiency of behavior. So think about
- 3:09:11how much more you get per hour of
- 3:09:13output. If you can't sit still, ignore
- 3:09:16notifications, and focus on one task for
- 3:09:19eight hours straight. Never expect to
- 3:09:21build anything great. And as
- 3:09:22uncomfortable as that is, it's also the
- 3:09:25truth. Like I I don't know a single
- 3:09:27incredibly successful entrepreneur that
- 3:09:29can't sit down and have hyperfocused
- 3:09:31periods of time, sometimes weekends,
- 3:09:33weeks at a time, where they don't talk
- 3:09:35to anyone and they just hammer away. And
- 3:09:37it's whether they're coding for software
- 3:09:39or they're making some insane marketing
- 3:09:41campaign and all the email follow-ups
- 3:09:42and all the text follow-ups and and the
- 3:09:44affiliate uh you know promotions and
- 3:09:45incentives or someone who's creating a
- 3:09:47product that they're designing and
- 3:09:49they're in the shop and they keep
- 3:09:50tweaking at it. Or they're somebody
- 3:09:52who's who's hypers scaling a company and
- 3:09:54saying I'm going to sit in 20 interviews
- 3:09:56a day for for seven days straight so I
- 3:09:58can hire 20 people this week because I
- 3:10:00need to get going. Right? Like if you
- 3:10:02can't sit still and ignore notifications
- 3:10:05and focus for a day, nothing great will
- 3:10:08get accomplished because it's not about
- 3:10:11what you want, it's about what's
- 3:10:12required. And it's and whether that's
- 3:10:14your best or not is irrelevant. It's
- 3:10:16just there's a price tag and you got to
- 3:10:17be willing to pay for it or you don't
- 3:10:19get the thing. And a lot of times it's
- 3:10:21not what you want. And I I I I spend a
- 3:10:24lot of time trying to dispel the concept
- 3:10:25of like follow your passion because I
- 3:10:27think it leads more people astray than
- 3:10:30it helps because it's very easy for
- 3:10:32someone who's successful who's already
- 3:10:34delegated tons of things to only then
- 3:10:36focus on their area of genius and then
- 3:10:38say here for my seat do what I do. But
- 3:10:41there's a very big difference between
- 3:10:42doing what someone does and doing what
- 3:10:44they did to get there. And I think this
- 3:10:46is what's lost in a lot of the content
- 3:10:47that I see in the entrepreneurial space.
- 3:10:49And to be clear, whenever I'm trying to
- 3:10:51get to the next level, I often have to
- 3:10:53take on things that I don't know how to
- 3:10:54do and I have to learn how to do them,
- 3:10:56which means I have to suck for a period
- 3:10:57of time. And sucking sucks. But the
- 3:10:59thing is is you have to be able to
- 3:11:00embrace that period of time and say like
- 3:11:02this is the cost of greatness. And so
- 3:11:04I'll give you something very tactical.
- 3:11:06So I have timers in a lot of my offices
- 3:11:08and my team has adopted this too, which
- 3:11:10is I like to time block, which is
- 3:11:12essentially saying how long do I think
- 3:11:14this is going to take? And you can do
- 3:11:15this on a week scale, you can do it on a
- 3:11:17daily level. It depends on the level of
- 3:11:18project you're tackling. But for me,
- 3:11:20even on the most micro level, I say,
- 3:11:22"Okay, how long should this take?" I'll
- 3:11:24then crank this thing. Boop. I think
- 3:11:26this should take 20 minutes. And then I
- 3:11:28hit start and I let the timer go. And if
- 3:11:30for whatever reason something distracts
- 3:11:32me, I pause it so that I know that I
- 3:11:36didn't actually work that period of
- 3:11:38time. And so what happens is it will
- 3:11:39give you a very real look at how long
- 3:11:41you're actually working versus how long
- 3:11:44you think you're working. and you tell
- 3:11:45other people working and you Instagram
- 3:11:47how long you're working. And as I've
- 3:11:49become more efficient at work, meaning
- 3:11:51my output per unit of time has gone up,
- 3:11:53I've realized that there's just been a
- 3:11:55significant decrease in the distractions
- 3:11:57that I allow to interrupt me. Again, if
- 3:12:00you want to stay focused, staying
- 3:12:01focused is not like zeroing in and
- 3:12:04saying, "I'm going to do it just like
- 3:12:05I'm going to I'm going to I'm going to
- 3:12:07just zoom in on this thing." It's more
- 3:12:10that focus occurs when you remove
- 3:12:13everything else. what's left is focus.
- 3:12:16And so Jerry Seinfeld has this uh this
- 3:12:18famous process that he talks about with
- 3:12:20writing and I think writers are also
- 3:12:21wonderful people for talking to for deep
- 3:12:23work because it's the nature of the work
- 3:12:24they do. One of the things that he did
- 3:12:26and he has done for years for his
- 3:12:28standup so he can script it out is that
- 3:12:30he locks himself in a room that has no
- 3:12:32windows and has nothing but a yellow
- 3:12:35notepad and a pen. And he tells himself
- 3:12:38that he has to go in that room and he
- 3:12:40doesn't have to write but he can't do
- 3:12:41anything else. And so what ends up
- 3:12:43happening is that writing occurs as a
- 3:12:45default. And so focus kind of works the
- 3:12:48same way. You eliminate everything else
- 3:12:50by to create focus. You don't try and
- 3:12:52push harder while also having these
- 3:12:54disruptions. So there's three easy ways
- 3:12:56that I make my phone less distracting.
- 3:12:58The first is I switch it to grayscale.
- 3:13:01And so grayscale decreases consumption
- 3:13:03across all people by 30%ish. And that's
- 3:13:06researchbacked. It's pretty cool. The
- 3:13:08second thing is turning off all
- 3:13:09notifications across all apps on your
- 3:13:12phone because you never want your app to
- 3:13:15be dictating when it's convenient for
- 3:13:17the app to disrupt you. Like, how
- 3:13:19ridiculous is that? But we let apps have
- 3:13:21that permission. Most phones and people
- 3:13:23want to push notifications to you. I
- 3:13:26want to pull them when it's convenient
- 3:13:28for me. The third thing is other people.
- 3:13:31And so I have a mode on my phone where
- 3:13:34no one can get through. And when I do
- 3:13:36that, then I can reach out to them when
- 3:13:38it's convenient for me. Because if it's
- 3:13:41actually an emergency, call 911. And if
- 3:13:43it's not a true emergency, then it can
- 3:13:45wait. And my team wanted to remind me
- 3:13:47that I don't email. I heard in uh I
- 3:13:49think it was like 2016 that Bill Clinton
- 3:13:52didn't use email. And I was like, if
- 3:13:54he's the president, he doesn't use
- 3:13:55email, I cannot use email. And so uh my
- 3:13:58team doesn't contact me via email. And
- 3:14:00so if you can eliminate entire channels,
- 3:14:03that's also an easier way to concentrate
- 3:14:06uh fewer flows of communication. And
- 3:14:09here's the thing, it's always harder,
- 3:14:12takes longer, and costs more than you
- 3:14:14think it will. That is a reflection of
- 3:14:17poor expectations, not that that reality
- 3:14:20is bad. And so it makes sense that it
- 3:14:22would be harder, take longer, and cost
- 3:14:25more. Because if it didn't, then
- 3:14:26everyone would have it, and everyone had
- 3:14:28it, then it wouldn't be worthwhile. And
- 3:14:30so literally the difficulty of the task
- 3:14:32that you embark on is proportional to
- 3:14:34the reward that you ultimately get
- 3:14:36because you are the asset that you build
- 3:14:38more than the achievement. And so if
- 3:14:40it's hard, that's amazing because it
- 3:14:42will make you that much harder once you
- 3:14:43conquer it. And it will also make it
- 3:14:45harder for anybody else who wants to
- 3:14:46follow in your footsteps. And so the
- 3:14:48higher up the mountain you climb, the
- 3:14:50thinner the air gets and the rarer the
- 3:14:52climber or explorer must be in order to
- 3:14:55get there. And so, I don't know about
- 3:14:57you, but I would so much rather climb a
- 3:14:59mountain that so few people have been
- 3:15:01able to climb so that I can see a view
- 3:15:02that other people haven't seen. And so,
- 3:15:04speaking of expectations, let me talk
- 3:15:06about the worst expectation of all,
- 3:15:08which is entitlement, which is the
- 3:15:10expectation of life or other people to
- 3:15:12give you something without earning it.
- 3:15:14And I think that this is is a is a virus
- 3:15:17in today's culture right now. And so,
- 3:15:19there's the famous quote, "Hard times
- 3:15:21create strong men. Strong men create
- 3:15:24good times. Good times create weak men
- 3:15:27and weak men create hard times. It makes
- 3:15:29sense that right now we have a lot of
- 3:15:32weak men because it's been pretty good
- 3:15:34times. The good news about that is that
- 3:15:36it's so easy to beat them. You just have
- 3:15:39to show up, be on time, prepare the
- 3:15:42night before, remembers people's names,
- 3:15:44actually follow up when you say you were
- 3:15:46going to, and try like you mean it
- 3:15:49rather than trying like you want to get
- 3:15:51credit for trying. And I see this is
- 3:15:53this this thing that's that that's
- 3:15:56pervasive right now is that people will
- 3:15:58comment or they'll DM me and they're
- 3:16:00like, "Hey, I'm trying really hard." As
- 3:16:02though I'm supposed to give them credit
- 3:16:04for trying. The world doesn't work that
- 3:16:06way. It gives you credit for achieving.
- 3:16:09And the reason that you want credit for
- 3:16:10trying is because you want it to cost
- 3:16:13less, take shorter time period, and be
- 3:16:15easier. And so if you restate your
- 3:16:18complaint about the difficulty as, "Oh,
- 3:16:21I have false expectations about the ease
- 3:16:23or the price tag of this goal." Then all
- 3:16:26of a sudden you realize that the only
- 3:16:27real problem was that you expected it to
- 3:16:30cost less. It's like going to the store
- 3:16:32and being like, "Oh, I've got these
- 3:16:33Jordans that I really want to buy. I got
- 3:16:35$50. I'm so excited to buy them." You go
- 3:16:37to the store and see that they're $300.
- 3:16:40At that point, you can just say,
- 3:16:41"Jordans aren't for me." Or you can say,
- 3:16:43"Oh, I will have to keep working and
- 3:16:45keep saving so that I can afford this."
- 3:16:47And so it's a lot about affording the
- 3:16:49goals that you want to achieve and a lot
- 3:16:52of things that we have to spend in order
- 3:16:54to get them is the time and the
- 3:16:56rejection of not achieving what we want
- 3:16:58on the timeline we originally thought.
- 3:17:00Like what makes success hard is that the
- 3:17:02expectation that society puts because we
- 3:17:04only see the highlight reel. You
- 3:17:06actually only see people after they
- 3:17:08finish the race. People think success is
- 3:17:10like watching a marathon, not running a
- 3:17:13marathon. When you watch a marathon, you
- 3:17:15look at the beginning and you look at
- 3:17:16the end. It only takes you a couple of
- 3:17:18seconds to see both of those. But
- 3:17:20running a marathon is four, five, six
- 3:17:23straight hours of breathing heavy,
- 3:17:25wondering when it's going to end,
- 3:17:27counting, starting to play games in your
- 3:17:28mind of like, okay, I'm I'm 2/ird of the
- 3:17:30way there. I'm two two more quarters of
- 3:17:32that. I'm only one of the of 1/8 of the
- 3:17:35way there. And you keep doing this to
- 3:17:37play tricks on your mind to keep going.
- 3:17:39But the thing is is that in a mile
- 3:17:41marker race, it's very clear to know how
- 3:17:43you're going to get to the finish line
- 3:17:44and how long it's going to take. The
- 3:17:46only difference with success is that you
- 3:17:48just have to keep running and you don't
- 3:17:49know where the finish line is. And
- 3:17:51people will only cheer you on at that
- 3:17:53finish line that they don't know where
- 3:17:54it is either, which means you have to
- 3:17:55get used to running alone. And so the
- 3:17:57difficulty is you have to start running
- 3:18:00and you have to keep running, but you
- 3:18:02just don't know whether you're running
- 3:18:04for a mile or 300. And so this is where
- 3:18:07the pacing is important. So a lot of
- 3:18:09people will run really hard. They'll
- 3:18:10they'll think because they only saw the
- 3:18:13beginning of the marathon on TV and the
- 3:18:15finish of the marathon on TV that they
- 3:18:17can just sprint because both of those
- 3:18:19clips only lasted a couple of seconds.
- 3:18:21So, they start their marathon of success
- 3:18:24of whatever it is they're going after by
- 3:18:26sprinting as hard as they can and then
- 3:18:28they realize that there's no one around
- 3:18:30and there's just a bunch of open road
- 3:18:32ahead of them and they're like, "How
- 3:18:33long is this going to take?" And that's
- 3:18:35when reality sets in. And so, I make
- 3:18:37these videos to say that a lot of times
- 3:18:40it's going to take longer. So, one of
- 3:18:42the big nasty things that you have to
- 3:18:45eliminate on this path is the identity
- 3:18:48that you have about yourself, the isms
- 3:18:51that you claim. And so, for example,
- 3:18:53like, oh, I'm a I'm a neat freak. I'm a
- 3:18:57I'm not good at math. I'm not techy. And
- 3:19:00so, you make these statements and they
- 3:19:02don't serve you. Fundamentally, you
- 3:19:04should have one razor that rules all
- 3:19:06decisions. And I this is this is pretty
- 3:19:09cruel, but it's also the reality of the
- 3:19:11world, which is does this thing person
- 3:19:15belief make it more or less likely that
- 3:19:18I hit my goals? And so if you run every
- 3:19:21single thing you do, the actions you
- 3:19:23take, the people you hang out with, you
- 3:19:25having your phone in the room, you
- 3:19:26saying I'm not techy, does this increase
- 3:19:29or decrease the likelihood that you hit
- 3:19:31your goals? And I'm not saying this to
- 3:19:33preach cuz I had one that I dealt with
- 3:19:35for a long time. So I always considered
- 3:19:37myself to be bad at math. I remember I
- 3:19:40was decent at math and then in nth grade
- 3:19:42I had a really bad teacher and it
- 3:19:43basically put me back a year. Basically
- 3:19:45after algebra I didn't really learn
- 3:19:46anything because the year after that I
- 3:19:48didn't have the the foundations from the
- 3:19:49year before. The difficulty was I kept
- 3:19:53saying after that point I'm just not
- 3:19:55good at math. But when I was in my 20s I
- 3:19:58made the decision that that didn't serve
- 3:19:59me anymore. And so I was like okay well
- 3:20:02what would I have to do to feel like I
- 3:20:04was good at math? And I was like, well,
- 3:20:06people who like can do math in their
- 3:20:07head. I think that's a pretty cool
- 3:20:09thing. And so I didn't use a calculator
- 3:20:11for anything for years. And then I
- 3:20:15learned I mean, I made a lot of mistakes
- 3:20:17in the beginning, but then I got better
- 3:20:18and better at doing math in my head. And
- 3:20:21I would check it obviously after I was
- 3:20:23done, but I always let my head try and
- 3:20:25do it first. And so nowadays, if you
- 3:20:27were to ask people, man, is Alex good at
- 3:20:29math? They're like, dude, he just
- 3:20:30rattles off numbers like crazy. But the
- 3:20:32thing is is that until I was in my 20s,
- 3:20:34I thought I was bad at math. And so it's
- 3:20:36like we are so much more pliable than we
- 3:20:38think we are. And we had something that
- 3:20:40set us on a trajectory a little bit
- 3:20:42earlier in life that just gave us maybe
- 3:20:44a little bit of disadvantage. Fine,
- 3:20:46because you just have to get over it.
- 3:20:48Everyone's childhood was difficult. And
- 3:20:50if you want to win the award for hardest
- 3:20:52childhood, congrats, you win. You feel
- 3:20:54better, right? No one cares about what
- 3:20:57happened to you then. Only what you can
- 3:20:59make happen now. Identity is a lie. We
- 3:21:03only describe people about who they are
- 3:21:06by what they do. Doing is being. And so
- 3:21:10if you want to be somehow different, you
- 3:21:12have to do different things. And then
- 3:21:14only afterwards will people describe you
- 3:21:16based on the actions you take. Think
- 3:21:18about back in the day, the actual names
- 3:21:20people had was he's John the Carpenter,
- 3:21:23he's John the Stonesmith, he's John the
- 3:21:26Mason, right? People literally had their
- 3:21:28names based on what they did. That
- 3:21:31hasn't changed. The first thing you do
- 3:21:33when you meet somebody is you find out
- 3:21:34what do what do you do? And that that
- 3:21:36gives you indications. And if you want
- 3:21:37to describe who someone is, what do you
- 3:21:39say? You describe what they do. And so
- 3:21:41this means that our identity is 100%
- 3:21:43under our control because we control
- 3:21:45what we do. And then only after the fact
- 3:21:47will other people describe you in that
- 3:21:49way. So we covered environmental things
- 3:21:51like with the phone and having a timer.
- 3:21:53We covered interpersonal things in terms
- 3:21:55of our identity and voting with the our
- 3:21:57dollars and time about the things that
- 3:21:58we care about. We eliminated the bad
- 3:22:00people and their opinions about us that
- 3:22:03affect our behavior. And so we've
- 3:22:04eliminated all these things. So now
- 3:22:07we've made room to get started. And the
- 3:22:09good news is you only need three things
- 3:22:12to win. The balls to start, the brains
- 3:22:14to learn, and the heart to never give
- 3:22:17up. And the best thing is you already
- 3:22:19have all three. And for the girls, you
- 3:22:21have gonads. So it's fine. it still
- 3:22:22counts. And so my ask of you is to make
- 3:22:25the commitment. Now this is again the
- 3:22:27elimination of alternatives, to make the
- 3:22:29commitment to never stop. And so it
- 3:22:32doesn't mean that I'm asking you to
- 3:22:33commit to be successful. I'm asking you
- 3:22:35to commit to keep running, to keep
- 3:22:37walking the marathon. Even if you have
- 3:22:39to pant and you have to slow down, you
- 3:22:41just can't stop. And so the best way to
- 3:22:44hit next year's goals is to not wait
- 3:22:46until next year to work on them. Is to
- 3:22:48start now. Because I'll tell you this,
- 3:22:50if you feel like you need a special
- 3:22:52occasion to begin making your life
- 3:22:54better, then it assumes that a special
- 3:22:57occasion must always be there for you to
- 3:23:00want to improve yourself. It shows that
- 3:23:03you don't think today is worth
- 3:23:05improving. And so that means that you
- 3:23:07typically will always cast forward when
- 3:23:10you think things are worth improving.
- 3:23:11And so the easiest way to vote with your
- 3:23:13action is to make today the only day
- 3:23:15that is good because it's the only day
- 3:23:17you have control over. My hot take,
- 3:23:20which shouldn't be, is you don't have to
- 3:23:22wait until January 1st to better
- 3:23:24yourself. And I'm purposely posting this
- 3:23:26before the year ends because I think
- 3:23:28it's stupid to wait. Like why would you
- 3:23:31wait on getting better? Why would you
- 3:23:32like if you had a lottery ticket, why
- 3:23:34would you wait to cash it in? You would
- 3:23:36cash it in as fast as humanly possible.
- 3:23:38And that lottery ticket is the life that
- 3:23:40you want on the other side of this. Why
- 3:23:42would you wait? Here's a harsh truth.
- 3:23:44You're young. You've got time. False.
- 3:23:48All that lie does is extend how long it
- 3:23:51takes people to realize tomorrow isn't
- 3:23:53guaranteed. Nothing is going to be easy.
- 3:23:56Get over it. It takes time to get good.
- 3:23:59And the sooner you start, the sooner you
- 3:24:01act. And the sooner you act, the sooner
- 3:24:03you get. And don't stop until you do.
- 3:24:06And as harsh as that sounds, I do have
- 3:24:08good news. It only takes 20 hours of
- 3:24:11focused effort to get decent at
- 3:24:13anything. The problem is people wait
- 3:24:16years before they start their first
- 3:24:18hour. So many of you could probably
- 3:24:20start achieving next year goals before
- 3:24:22the end of this year. 20 hours is not
- 3:24:25that long. If you're like, man, I really
- 3:24:26want to learn ads. I really want to
- 3:24:28learn how to make content. I really want
- 3:24:29to learn how to edit videos. I really
- 3:24:30want to learn how to sell. You can do
- 3:24:32that now. And you can have that skill.
- 3:24:35like we can onboard a new sales guy in
- 3:24:37in in a few days. There's this massive
- 3:24:39delay that people think because of the
- 3:24:41unknown. They don't know what is going
- 3:24:44to happen and so they therefore assume
- 3:24:46that it's bad. And so the reality is
- 3:24:48that most people don't like surprises
- 3:24:50even if they're good ones. Have you ever
- 3:24:52heard people like, "Oh, I don't like
- 3:24:53surprise parties." It's a [ __ ] party.
- 3:24:56Why would you hate a surprise party
- 3:24:59that's in your favor? You hate it
- 3:25:01because you don't like the unknown. And
- 3:25:02so it's a really good thing to test for
- 3:25:04yourself, which is why would I hate a
- 3:25:06good surprise? You hate it because
- 3:25:09there's a possibility that the surprise
- 3:25:10is negative. But on a long time horizon,
- 3:25:13you know, 85year-old you isn't even
- 3:25:15going to remember it to begin with. This
- 3:25:17is a this is going to be a weird one for
- 3:25:18you, but just stay with me. If you've
- 3:25:21ever been so drunk that you're throwing
- 3:25:24up and you think to yourself, "Man, I'm
- 3:25:27probably not going to remember this."
- 3:25:29The good news is is that once you do
- 3:25:32succeed, that terrible period of
- 3:25:34vomiting or whatever the difficulty is
- 3:25:36that you're going through, it'll
- 3:25:37actually compress in your mind. And so,
- 3:25:39as difficult as it may seem in the
- 3:25:41moment, it actually doesn't stay with
- 3:25:42you. All you'll have left is the thing
- 3:25:45you accomplished, you won't remember the
- 3:25:47work that it took to get there. There'll
- 3:25:49be a significant discount on the
- 3:25:50punishment you endured. I tend to have a
- 3:25:53bad habit of really not looking back
- 3:25:55very much. And so I occasionally will go
- 3:25:58through my photos and I am reminded
- 3:26:01about all of the mistakes and the
- 3:26:03detours that I took along the way to
- 3:26:06where I wanted to go. And I'll tell you
- 3:26:07the story that my father told me when I
- 3:26:08was uh very impatient. He said, "Listen,
- 3:26:12you think that this is taking too long
- 3:26:14for you to be successful?" He said, "Do
- 3:26:16you know how long it took me to become a
- 3:26:18doctor?" And I was like, "No." He's
- 3:26:21like, "Well, so my father's a run-in,
- 3:26:24and he left the country to get educated,
- 3:26:28and there was a program for anybody
- 3:26:29who's a run-in that the government would
- 3:26:30pay for your schooling as long as you
- 3:26:32came back with the education." Now, the
- 3:26:34revolution occurred during the time he
- 3:26:36was away. So, he actually never got to
- 3:26:37go back. He went to uh France, Paris, to
- 3:26:41try and enter medical school. Only
- 3:26:43problem, he didn't speak French. And so
- 3:26:46he's trying to do premed in another
- 3:26:48language as somebody who doesn't even
- 3:26:50share the same alphabet. And so he
- 3:26:52failed that year. He then took a the
- 3:26:56second year he tried again because
- 3:26:57you're allowed in in in France. It's a
- 3:26:59different system. You could just
- 3:26:59basically try as many times as you want.
- 3:27:01He started again and the second year he
- 3:27:04failed again and then he talked to his
- 3:27:06brother and he's like, "I don't know if
- 3:27:07being a doctor is for me. Like I just
- 3:27:09feel like imagine this like failing two
- 3:27:11full years in a row." and his brother
- 3:27:14said, "Hey, why don't you go to Belgium?
- 3:27:15You know, change the environment, you
- 3:27:17know, different different school,
- 3:27:18different people. Go there." So, he went
- 3:27:21to Belgium and then his third try, he
- 3:27:23made it past his first year. Now, mind
- 3:27:25you, at this point, he had two years of
- 3:27:27learning French and so he was able to
- 3:27:29finally actually understand what the
- 3:27:30professor was saying. So, was it that he
- 3:27:33wasn't smart enough to understand how to
- 3:27:36become a doctor or was it that he just
- 3:27:38had other skills that he lacked along
- 3:27:40the way? And so a lot of people right
- 3:27:42now are judging the fact that they
- 3:27:43didn't succeed because they somehow
- 3:27:45think it's some innate trait. I'm not
- 3:27:47smart enough. I'm not good enough. But
- 3:27:49sometimes you just lack some
- 3:27:50prerequisite skills, right? Like if
- 3:27:52you're like trying to learn calculus and
- 3:27:54you've never done arithmetic before,
- 3:27:55it's going to be really hard, right?
- 3:27:57Dare I say impossible. And so if you
- 3:27:59jump straight into calculus, you're not
- 3:28:01going to win. So sometimes you have to
- 3:28:03take two steps back in order to build
- 3:28:04the foundation to get forward. Now, I'm
- 3:28:07going to keep the story going. So he
- 3:28:08then graduates in uh you know seven
- 3:28:11years because how long it takes the
- 3:28:12actual medical school system is
- 3:28:14different in in in in uh in Europe. They
- 3:28:16actually do college and the the next
- 3:28:18degree all is one thing. So 7 years
- 3:28:20later he graduates. Okay. Then he's this
- 3:28:23Iranian dude can't go back to his own
- 3:28:25country. Meets a girl in Belgium. She
- 3:28:27says I'm from the US. And so he comes
- 3:28:29back to the US with the lady who would
- 3:28:32eventually become my mother. And when
- 3:28:35he's in the US, he then his doctor, his
- 3:28:38his MD doesn't apply here. So he then
- 3:28:42has to basically do it again in the
- 3:28:44United States. And in order to do this,
- 3:28:46you have to get a residency. Now,
- 3:28:48getting a residency as someone who's a
- 3:28:50foreigner back then was pretty tough.
- 3:28:53And so it took him two years where he
- 3:28:55had to basically work minimum wage jobs.
- 3:28:56He was like uh he had to like run slides
- 3:28:59like radiology slides back and forth as
- 3:29:01like a runner, a courier. when he was a
- 3:29:03full surgeon, but he couldn't do it here
- 3:29:05in the US. And so imagine how
- 3:29:07emasculineating it is, right? Where your
- 3:29:10wife comes back, she's able, she was a
- 3:29:12US citizen and had all this other stuff,
- 3:29:14right? And she could, she got her
- 3:29:15internship immediately because uh she
- 3:29:17was US and she was a girl, whatever. And
- 3:29:19my father didn't. And so he then had to
- 3:29:22do two more years where he didn't have
- 3:29:25progress. So he he told me the whole
- 3:29:26story and then eventually obviously he
- 3:29:27got the he got the residency and then he
- 3:29:29was able to get in the path. But if you
- 3:29:30look at that, he basically had four or
- 3:29:32five years of his life where there was
- 3:29:34basically no net gain in progress
- 3:29:37towards his goals. And so he's telling
- 3:29:39me this story when he's 50 and he's
- 3:29:41like, "Look at my life now." He's like,
- 3:29:43"No one knows." He's like, "No one asks
- 3:29:45me how long it took. They just know what
- 3:29:47I have now and what I can do now." And
- 3:29:49so you have this idea that it's that it
- 3:29:52should take a certain period of time. It
- 3:29:55it should only last this long. It should
- 3:29:57be this level of difficulty. But the
- 3:29:59thing is is just that that level of
- 3:30:01perseverance when he decided to go out
- 3:30:03on his own and start his own practice
- 3:30:05rather than and and left the practice
- 3:30:06that he was working in he then didn't
- 3:30:09know anyone and he still had a heavy
- 3:30:11accent was a new guy in a new area and
- 3:30:13it took him time to build up. And what
- 3:30:14did he do? My dad learned how to be a
- 3:30:16general contractor. He built his own
- 3:30:18surgical center because he couldn't
- 3:30:19afford having these outsourced third
- 3:30:21parties that charge $250,000 to build a
- 3:30:23surgery center. He built his his for a
- 3:30:25fraction of that. And so as my dad going
- 3:30:27to Home Depot, measuring and figuring
- 3:30:29these things out as a full plastic
- 3:30:30surgeon, it's not about the resources
- 3:30:33you have. It's about how resourceful
- 3:30:34you're willing to be right now. Getting
- 3:30:37started is 100% under your control. And
- 3:30:40I love taking this frame, which is that
- 3:30:42every self-made billionaire is
- 3:30:44self-made. Now, if you're like, wait,
- 3:30:46there are billionaires who aren't
- 3:30:47self-made, right? That's why I didn't
- 3:30:49say all billionaires. Every self-made
- 3:30:52billionaire is self-made. And every
- 3:30:54self-made millionaire is self-made. And
- 3:30:57here's the one people hate. Every
- 3:30:59self-made person in poverty is
- 3:31:01self-made. Now, that may make you feel
- 3:31:04uncomfortable. And you know what? You
- 3:31:06may be right. You probably did have more
- 3:31:08disadvantages. You probably did have
- 3:31:10things that worked against you. And now
- 3:31:12what? You're right. So that's it then
- 3:31:16for you. The rest of your life will
- 3:31:18never go the way you want it to go. The
- 3:31:20harsh truth here is if you want to feel
- 3:31:22better, blame others. If you want to get
- 3:31:26better, blame yourself. And so my father
- 3:31:29told me that story multiple times in my
- 3:31:32life, as I'm sure your fathers have told
- 3:31:34you stories multiple times in your life,
- 3:31:35or you had a parent or an uncle or a
- 3:31:37brother, and they told you those big
- 3:31:38meaningful stories. And so I'll tell you
- 3:31:40another time he told me it. So after I
- 3:31:43lost everything for the second time,
- 3:31:46think about like I tell the story, but
- 3:31:48it's very easy to gloss over, but think
- 3:31:51about this. I had left my job, went to a
- 3:31:55new area, didn't know anyone, started a
- 3:31:57gym, didn't have enough money to have an
- 3:31:58apartment, slept at my gym, just
- 3:32:00grassroots got it going, made the gym
- 3:32:02successful by working there every hour
- 3:32:04of the day. Was finally successful
- 3:32:06enough to be able to open a second
- 3:32:07location, a third, a fourth, a fifth, a
- 3:32:08sixth. finally feel like I I tasted the
- 3:32:11success, like I'm actually doing
- 3:32:12something. I'm actually pretty good
- 3:32:13here. Like that bet that I made actually
- 3:32:15paid off and then I lose it all. And so
- 3:32:19I I I sell all those locations. I put
- 3:32:21the money in a new thing and then it's
- 3:32:23gone. And so I could look back and say,
- 3:32:27"Wow, I just spent all those years and I
- 3:32:30actually have nothing to show for it.
- 3:32:32The only thing I would have had to show
- 3:32:34was the money that I made." But my
- 3:32:36father retold me that story and he said
- 3:32:38it was never about the amount of
- 3:32:40failures failures he had. It was about
- 3:32:42the education that he had. And so one of
- 3:32:44the other repeated fatherisms that he
- 3:32:46gave me was that education is the only
- 3:32:49thing that no one can take from you. The
- 3:32:51skills you have, the skills you acquire
- 3:32:53along the way are the only thing that
- 3:32:55are truly yours. There's nothing else in
- 3:32:57this world that actually belongs to you.
- 3:33:00Your your clothes can get stolen. the
- 3:33:02belongings you have. And he said this
- 3:33:04from a place of reality, which is my
- 3:33:07family came from a country that took all
- 3:33:09of our assets. They seized everything.
- 3:33:11They seized land. They seized homes.
- 3:33:13They seized wealth. They just said, "Oh
- 3:33:15yeah, all that that's ours now. Good
- 3:33:18luck." This may not be as real for
- 3:33:20people in the United States. But having
- 3:33:23people who everyone in my family had
- 3:33:25everything taken from them that is very
- 3:33:28evident in how they talked to me and how
- 3:33:31I've always seen the world as these
- 3:33:33things are ephemeral these material
- 3:33:35goods the studio the setup the lights
- 3:33:37the whatever the platforms
- 3:33:39like gone but the thing is is that my
- 3:33:43father came here with $1,000 because of
- 3:33:45the revolution and had nothing and built
- 3:33:46the life he has and you can lose it all
- 3:33:49and gain it back. And so we've seen so
- 3:33:52many entrepreneurs who've actually lived
- 3:33:53through this cycle. It's actually a
- 3:33:55common thing in entrepreneurship. And
- 3:33:56it's because you have to understand and
- 3:33:58respect risk. The beauty of it is that
- 3:34:02after you fail, the likelihood that
- 3:34:03you're successful goes up, not down.
- 3:34:06This is the part that people miss. They
- 3:34:08fail and think it somehow decreases the
- 3:34:10likelihood of success, but it actually
- 3:34:11increases it. And so it's like you want
- 3:34:13to just get the failures out of the way.
- 3:34:14Why would you not want something that
- 3:34:15increases the likelihood at your goal?
- 3:34:17And the reason that it increases that
- 3:34:18likelihood is that failure
- 3:34:21is a requisite
- 3:34:23probability for taking action. And so
- 3:34:26anyone who has failed has taken more
- 3:34:28action than someone who's done nothing.
- 3:34:29Which means it increases the likelihood
- 3:34:31that they are successful. And so when
- 3:34:33you fail, you get feedback. And when you
- 3:34:35get feedback, you get better. And when
- 3:34:37you get better, it increases the
- 3:34:38likelihood you win. Losers
- 3:34:41stay losers by never being willing to
- 3:34:44lose.
- 3:34:46Everyone loses before they win. And so
- 3:34:48there's this great moment in the Matrix,
- 3:34:50which is the the famous jump where Neo
- 3:34:52is trying to jump across the buildings
- 3:34:54and everyone's gathered around because
- 3:34:56they think he's the one. He obviously
- 3:34:58takes the jump and he falls and they're
- 3:35:01like, "Ah, what does it mean? What does
- 3:35:02it mean?" And Cipher, who ended up
- 3:35:04eventually being the Judas of this,
- 3:35:06says, "Everybody falls the first time."
- 3:35:08And so even the one or the person who
- 3:35:10was going to become the one was somebody
- 3:35:13who had to fail first. And I love that
- 3:35:15because everyone falls the first time.
- 3:35:17Your first business is very unlikely to
- 3:35:19be your last business. The first product
- 3:35:21you have will be a product that you'll
- 3:35:23be embarrassed of years from now. But
- 3:35:25what's important is having the product,
- 3:35:27getting the product, building the
- 3:35:28product, launching the product, shooting
- 3:35:30the shot. And so if you're never willing
- 3:35:32to lose, you're never going to win. So,
- 3:35:35in 2025, if you start a podcast or you
- 3:35:37start making content, you start doing
- 3:35:39cold outbound or you you you you take a
- 3:35:41new job, whatever it is, just remember
- 3:35:43that your second try after you fail,
- 3:35:45which you inevitably will, takes twice
- 3:35:48the emotional effort, but half the
- 3:35:50actual effort. So, you'll fail and
- 3:35:52you'll emotionally feel bad. But guess
- 3:35:54what you did? You actually gripped your
- 3:35:56hands on the unknown and you go from
- 3:35:59unknown optimism to known pessimism. So
- 3:36:02it's like okay now I know what it takes
- 3:36:05I now have realistic expectations what
- 3:36:08is required in order to be successful
- 3:36:10and although it may be bigger than I
- 3:36:13originally thought I now can quantify
- 3:36:15what is required to win and so here's
- 3:36:18the thing the best entrepreneurs in the
- 3:36:20world have the biggest failure resumes
- 3:36:23and so I don't even want you to win I
- 3:36:25want you to build your failure resume
- 3:36:26and so if you're like oh it must be easy
- 3:36:28for you to say I lost money on my first
- 3:36:30two real estate deals I ever did. Almost
- 3:36:32lost all the money I put in. I've lost
- 3:36:34money on crypto when I put it in years
- 3:36:36ago. I lost money on uh bad hires. I've
- 3:36:39lost millions in bad hires, actual hard
- 3:36:41costs, not soft costs. I've had six
- 3:36:44failed businesses. I've had nine failed
- 3:36:45partnerships. And so I bring these
- 3:36:47things up because like you're not going
- 3:36:49to hit it out of the park on the first
- 3:36:50shot. But the crazy thing about how
- 3:36:52success works is that you only need to
- 3:36:54win once. That's the crazy part is you
- 3:36:57only have to win once. I'll read you
- 3:36:58this quote from Jeff Bezos, which is
- 3:37:00what I started my first book, $100
- 3:37:02million Offers, with. We all know that
- 3:37:04if you swing for the fences, you're
- 3:37:06going to strike out a lot, but you're
- 3:37:08also going to hit some home runs. The
- 3:37:10difference between baseball and
- 3:37:11business, however, is that baseball has
- 3:37:13a truncated outcome distribution. When
- 3:37:15you swing, no matter how well you
- 3:37:17connect with the ball, the most runs you
- 3:37:19can hit is four. In business, every once
- 3:37:22in a while, when you step up to the
- 3:37:23plate, you can score 1,000 runs. This
- 3:37:27longtail distribution of returns is why
- 3:37:29it's important to be bold. Big winners
- 3:37:31pay for so many experiments. And when he
- 3:37:33says big winners pay, they pay in
- 3:37:36failures. They pay in the scars that
- 3:37:39they have to incur and endure along to
- 3:37:42hitting it out of the park and hitting
- 3:37:44it out so big that they never have to
- 3:37:46swing again. And so I want to make this
- 3:37:47as real as I possibly can. I just found
- 3:37:50an old note from myself to myself that's
- 3:37:5412 years old. And so I talked about my
- 3:37:57$10,000 per month income goal. And
- 3:37:59reading it got me actually pretty choked
- 3:38:01up. This is all to say that no matter
- 3:38:03where you're at in your journey, you've
- 3:38:05just got to believe with all your
- 3:38:06[ __ ] heart that you're going to make
- 3:38:07it because no one else is going to
- 3:38:09believe for you. Because you can never
- 3:38:11expect someone to invest in you more
- 3:38:13than you invest in yourself. And the
- 3:38:14crazy thing is some people say they kill
- 3:38:17for a shot or they die for a chance when
- 3:38:19in reality they won't even wake up 60
- 3:38:21minutes earlier for it. So, we've
- 3:38:22eliminated the distractions, all of the
- 3:38:24things associated with not doing this
- 3:38:26stuff. And now, hopefully, I've removed
- 3:38:29some of the mental BS around getting
- 3:38:31started. And so, now once you start, you
- 3:38:33got to get better. Connections, money,
- 3:38:36looks, intelligence, those are all
- 3:38:38great, but you can beat someone with all
- 3:38:41of those things if they have only one
- 3:38:43trait. An insatiable desire to improve.
- 3:38:47No matter where they start, it's hard to
- 3:38:49beat someone who improves every second
- 3:38:51of every day without giving up. And this
- 3:38:53is why earlier I said ambitious people
- 3:38:56buy skills and they pay for those skills
- 3:38:58with time and money. And in order to
- 3:39:00have the time and money to invest in
- 3:39:02those skills, they have to take them
- 3:39:04from somewhere else. Because the thing
- 3:39:06is is that your resources are zero sum.
- 3:39:09And this is something that a lot of
- 3:39:10people aren't comfortable with. Whatever
- 3:39:11you choose to spend your time on, you
- 3:39:13take from something else. Whatever you
- 3:39:14choose to spend your money on, you take
- 3:39:16from something else. And so, most people
- 3:39:18don't have a resources issue. They have
- 3:39:20a priorities problem. You are choosing
- 3:39:23to say that other things are more
- 3:39:25important. And hey, I want to be real.
- 3:39:26If that stuff is more important to you,
- 3:39:28then amazing. You want it life.
- 3:39:29Congratulations. But if you don't have
- 3:39:31what you want and you're spending money
- 3:39:34to proliferate a life that is not the
- 3:39:36one you want to lead, then you need to
- 3:39:38shift the list to invest the time and
- 3:39:41money and pull from those things that
- 3:39:43you don't want to put more in the ones
- 3:39:44you do. And you want to starve out
- 3:39:46failure. So think about this. One of the
- 3:39:48easiest ways to to have more money is to
- 3:39:52work more hours. And you're like, how is
- 3:39:54that possible? Well, when you work more
- 3:39:56hours, it actually kills two birds. One
- 3:39:59is that you actually make more money
- 3:40:01when you work more hours, but on top of
- 3:40:03that, you don't spend money because you
- 3:40:06have less time to spend it. And so every
- 3:40:08hour of work is a net positive in two
- 3:40:10directions. So it saves you money you're
- 3:40:12not spending and makes you money. And so
- 3:40:15you want to find those little twists
- 3:40:17that you can make in your investments of
- 3:40:19time and money that are outsized. It's
- 3:40:21not just that you gain, you also stop
- 3:40:24the loss. I've always been willing to
- 3:40:26bet big on me. And so, a lot of you guys
- 3:40:30are trying to like bet big on Dogecoin
- 3:40:32or some meme thing or like some
- 3:40:34get-richqu. And I promise you, the guys
- 3:40:36who have all the money know how to do it
- 3:40:38better than you. And if you have your
- 3:40:39last thousand or 5,000 or $10,000 that
- 3:40:41you're like, "What do I do with it?" Bet
- 3:40:43on you cuz you'll never sell you. You're
- 3:40:46a long-term hold, right? And so, if you
- 3:40:48get better, you guarantee the win. And
- 3:40:51every investment you make compounds. You
- 3:40:53guarantee compounding because every
- 3:40:54skill stacks on top of other skills.
- 3:40:57Steve Jobs talked about how when he went
- 3:40:59to college and learned calligraphy, it
- 3:41:00was the reason that fonts showed up in
- 3:41:02the Mac later. And so he talks about you
- 3:41:04can only connect the dots looking back.
- 3:41:07You want to double down on investing
- 3:41:09more into you getting skills. And I'll
- 3:41:11tell you something that you probably
- 3:41:12don't know. So I spent $10,000 and I
- 3:41:16only had 50 saved up after years of
- 3:41:19being a consultant. So I had $50,000
- 3:41:20saved up. was 23 years old. It was my
- 3:41:23life savings. I spent $10,000 to get a
- 3:41:26gym coach. I joined a mastermind for gym
- 3:41:29owners. Fun fact, though, I didn't have
- 3:41:32a gym. But I figured if I go to a
- 3:41:34mastermind of gym owners, I'm going to
- 3:41:36learn so many of the things that they
- 3:41:38made mistakes on when they started their
- 3:41:39gym. They're they're going to have
- 3:41:40opinions on how I should lay out the
- 3:41:42square footage, what what locations I
- 3:41:44should pick, what model I should use.
- 3:41:46And so rather than say, "Oh, I'm just
- 3:41:47going to find out all these failures on
- 3:41:49my own my own and and take five times as
- 3:41:51long," I was like, "I'd rather pay
- 3:41:53$10,000 to pull five years forward into
- 3:41:55the present." And so I was able to get
- 3:41:56that first location up and profitable
- 3:41:59and outsource by month nine. Now, some
- 3:42:01of the guys in the mastermind were at
- 3:42:03year five and still hadn't done that. I
- 3:42:05pay down my ignorance tax as much as I
- 3:42:08possibly can because the cost of you not
- 3:42:12being able to achieve your dreams, the
- 3:42:14price is ignorance. And the debt that
- 3:42:17you pay is the distance between where
- 3:42:19you are and how much you'd be making if
- 3:42:22you knew how to do it. I I've told this
- 3:42:24story before, but I think it's so it's
- 3:42:25it's something that's so ingrained in
- 3:42:27how I think in terms of how I price what
- 3:42:29I'm willing to pay in time or money. And
- 3:42:31before I tell that story, I move
- 3:42:34geographically whenever I see an
- 3:42:36opportunity to get around someone who's
- 3:42:38better than me. And so when I wanted to
- 3:42:40learn fitness stuff, I moved to an area
- 3:42:42where I knew there was other fitness
- 3:42:43entrepreneurs that I was like, "Well,
- 3:42:44maybe I'll be able to hang out with them
- 3:42:45a little bit and I'll learn a little bit
- 3:42:46there." And I went to a city that I
- 3:42:47didn't know anything about. I knew no
- 3:42:49one. And when I wanted to when I wanted
- 3:42:51to uh get in the gym space, I said,
- 3:42:53"Well, California is like the capital of
- 3:42:55fitness, SoCal. So, I'm gonna move out
- 3:42:57to Southern California because the best
- 3:42:58guys will be there. and if I can win
- 3:43:00there, I'll be able to win anywhere. And
- 3:43:01so I moved out to California without
- 3:43:02knowing anyone. Whenever I've had these
- 3:43:04big transitions in my life is not only
- 3:43:07being willing to bet with my money and
- 3:43:10bet with my time, but also bet with my
- 3:43:12geographic location. I'm willing to risk
- 3:43:14losing the relationships that I had to
- 3:43:17gain relationships that I need. And so
- 3:43:192025 for you might mean that you have to
- 3:43:21leave where you're at. And that could
- 3:43:23mean across town, but it could also mean
- 3:43:24across the country or even across into a
- 3:43:26different country. It may mean that
- 3:43:27you're going to spend take all this
- 3:43:28money that you used to spend here and
- 3:43:30spend it in an entirely different way.
- 3:43:32You probably are going to have less
- 3:43:33stuff and that's okay because that stuff
- 3:43:37only deteriorates. It only gets worse.
- 3:43:39But you will only get better. Don't
- 3:43:41invest in Dogecoin. Don't even invest in
- 3:43:43the S&P 500. Invest instead in the SME
- 3:43:47500. Invest in you because you will
- 3:43:49always beat a 10% return in the stock
- 3:43:51market. And if you think that Dogecoin
- 3:43:54is going to out compete your personal
- 3:43:56growth, you're never going to win.
- 3:43:58Anyone can get rich fast as long as
- 3:44:00you're willing to make no money for a
- 3:44:02long period of time while you work to
- 3:44:04get good enough to get rich fast. And so
- 3:44:07I told you I'll tell you that story. The
- 3:44:08story goes like this. A guy is actually
- 3:44:10using this as a sales close to an
- 3:44:12audience. He wrote a million dollars on
- 3:44:15a whiteboard in front of an audience.
- 3:44:17And so then he called out to a lady in
- 3:44:18the front row and he said, "How much do
- 3:44:19you make, ma'am?" and she said,"
- 3:44:21$50,000.
- 3:44:23And he said, "Okay,
- 3:44:25well, right now you pay reality $950,000
- 3:44:31every single year for not knowing how to
- 3:44:34make a million." And when I saw that, I
- 3:44:38realized that the value of the skill of
- 3:44:40making a million dollars is the
- 3:44:42difference between what I'm making and
- 3:44:44what I could be making. And people
- 3:44:46wildly undervalue how much more they
- 3:44:49could be making once they have a skill.
- 3:44:51And so if you're the type of person who
- 3:44:54can actually follow instructions, show
- 3:44:56up on time, smile, be able to fail and
- 3:45:00keep going, virtually all education will
- 3:45:03net you a positive yield. Because let me
- 3:45:05ask you a question. Would you pay
- 3:45:07$950,000
- 3:45:08to make a million dollars and be able to
- 3:45:10make a million dollars every year? Well,
- 3:45:13that would be an insane deal. You pay it
- 3:45:14once and you get the skill forever. So
- 3:45:16every year after that you make a million
- 3:45:18dollars a year. Well, of course you
- 3:45:20should. Now, once you make the million
- 3:45:21dollars a year, are you willing to give
- 3:45:23a 100% of what you make to make $10
- 3:45:24million a year? Of course you should.
- 3:45:26And that's why education is by far the
- 3:45:29highest return. You can learn how to
- 3:45:31make a million a year for probably close
- 3:45:34to $200,000 a year. And you're like,
- 3:45:36"Well, well, where where do I spend
- 3:45:38that?" You'll spend that on conferences.
- 3:45:39You'll spend it on seminars. and it'll
- 3:45:41likely be in 2,000 to to 5,000 sometimes
- 3:45:46$30,000 chunks. But for some reason,
- 3:45:50you're willing to spend this on some
- 3:45:52academic who hasn't been in reality for
- 3:45:5420 years cuz they're on tenure and
- 3:45:55thinks that the world uh is just going
- 3:45:58to hand you stuff because that's their
- 3:45:59reality because they're government
- 3:46:01funded. Or you can pay money to people
- 3:46:05who live in real private businesses who
- 3:46:07do this stuff for a living. And here's
- 3:46:09the thing. I have never paid for
- 3:46:11education and not gotten more than what
- 3:46:13I paid for. Now, I don't want to
- 3:46:16conflate that with the fact that I've
- 3:46:18paid for things that I didn't think was
- 3:46:20worth that money to other people. But I
- 3:46:22always ask myself, okay, number one, how
- 3:46:25can I become the best student who's ever
- 3:46:27gone through this? How do I become this
- 3:46:29person's number one success story? And
- 3:46:31I've told every program, every partner,
- 3:46:33every vendor that I've ever worked with,
- 3:46:35I will be your biggest success story.
- 3:46:37And so the reality is once I am their
- 3:46:39biggest success story, is that because
- 3:46:41of them or because of me? And I think
- 3:46:43that's a choice that you get to make. Am
- 3:46:45I going to be the number one success
- 3:46:46story or do I want to be right and prove
- 3:46:49that they're not good? Well,
- 3:46:50congratulations. Maybe they're not that
- 3:46:52good. Well, what does that leave you
- 3:46:54with? No skills and less money. If you
- 3:46:56choose to succeed anyways and say, "What
- 3:46:59can I learn from this person? Because
- 3:47:00I've learned just as much from bad
- 3:47:02people as I have from good." Because a
- 3:47:04lot of times getting good is actually
- 3:47:06the removal of bad. And so if you find
- 3:47:08out other ways that people do a terrible
- 3:47:10job, it's also a wonderful way of
- 3:47:12figuring out how to not do a terrible
- 3:47:13job. And so if I want to create a
- 3:47:15product that's exceptional and I say,
- 3:47:17let's say I want to put a phone, a
- 3:47:19camera, the internet, email, all in one
- 3:47:22place. If you remove all of the stuff
- 3:47:24that sucks from all of those things,
- 3:47:26what you're left with is an iPhone. Most
- 3:47:28times you can always get more than what
- 3:47:31you pay for when you invest in you. So
- 3:47:34let's get really tactical. If you really
- 3:47:37want to double down on you, which will
- 3:47:38by far I mean think about this 10%
- 3:47:40improvement is the S&P 500. So you're
- 3:47:42saying that you could take Okay, let's
- 3:47:44be real. Let's do let's do real math. So
- 3:47:49let's say that you've got $10,000 saved
- 3:47:52up. Okay, let's say that's what your
- 3:47:54savings is, which by the way makes you
- 3:47:56like a top 40% American, FYI. So, let's
- 3:47:59say you've got $10,000 saved up. You
- 3:48:02could put in the S&P 500 and have that
- 3:48:05$10,000 be 10,900
- 3:48:08one year later. Or you can spend that on
- 3:48:12something that can triple your earning
- 3:48:14capacity. And next year, instead of
- 3:48:17making, let's say, $50,000 a year, you
- 3:48:20make $100,000 a year. Well, which of
- 3:48:23these increases the $50,000 plus
- 3:48:25increase is more than the net of the
- 3:48:29900? Because you lost the 10, you spent
- 3:48:32the whole thing here. You invested it.
- 3:48:34Here you spent it. But did you spend it
- 3:48:36or did you invest it in asset you could
- 3:48:38control? And so I don't know about you,
- 3:48:40but I'd rather have the extra 50 and put
- 3:48:43the 10 in. And then what do I do next
- 3:48:44year? I'm going to take this 50
- 3:48:48and I'm going to ask myself, is there
- 3:48:50anything I could put this $50,000 into?
- 3:48:52So, I could put in the S&P 500 and I
- 3:48:54could go and add myself an extra uh
- 3:48:575,000 uh $55,000, whatever. Let's say I
- 3:49:00get 10% that year. Okay, so I get 55,000
- 3:49:03this year. Or I could put that 50K into
- 3:49:0510 five 10K things or two 25K things and
- 3:49:09all of a sudden take my earning power
- 3:49:10from 100K to 250K.
- 3:49:14Wow, what a deal. But I'm gonna lose the
- 3:49:16whole 50 again. And so the thing is is
- 3:49:18that on my way up, I basically took my
- 3:49:20savings and I spent it almost every year
- 3:49:22on education because why on earth would
- 3:49:25I want the future to take longer to get
- 3:49:26to me? When you buy skills, it's the
- 3:49:29closest approximation to buying time.
- 3:49:32And so there's this big thing like you
- 3:49:33can't buy time. False. You can buy the
- 3:49:37future at a discount. and you buy the
- 3:49:39future at a discount by buying the
- 3:49:41skills required in order to get there
- 3:49:43faster. And so if it could take you five
- 3:49:46years if you did it on your own or it
- 3:49:48could take you one year if you paid four
- 3:49:49different people to help you out with
- 3:49:50each step of the process, why would you
- 3:49:52not want to pay all of the money you
- 3:49:54have to get to there and then have four
- 3:49:56years of gain with that new baseline.
- 3:49:58You now are living four years, 5 years
- 3:50:01into the future. It's like you skipping
- 3:50:03from being 20 to 25 and you getting the
- 3:50:05earning power at 25 plus, but now you're
- 3:50:06just 21. And then when you're at that
- 3:50:09point, you pull the next 5 years for it.
- 3:50:10And when you're 22, it's like living
- 3:50:11like you're 30, right? Like now at that
- 3:50:14point though, you might spend all your
- 3:50:15savings yet again. And this process has
- 3:50:17been one that I have consistently done
- 3:50:19for the entirety of my career. And it
- 3:50:20just gets to a point where you can't
- 3:50:22even spend the money. And so my very
- 3:50:24controversial advice is spend all your
- 3:50:27money on education for as long as you
- 3:50:30possibly can until you can't even spend
- 3:50:32the money because you're making too much
- 3:50:34of it. And so how do you become an
- 3:50:36expert? you do more repetitions than
- 3:50:38anyone else in a narrow field, which
- 3:50:40also means you fail more times than
- 3:50:42anyone else in a narrow field. And so,
- 3:50:44if you want to beat someone, just try 10
- 3:50:46times harder than them. And you only
- 3:50:48really need to try two or three times
- 3:50:50harder, but you probably don't realize
- 3:50:52how much harder they're trying than you
- 3:50:54are. So, try 10 times harder just to
- 3:50:56make sure you win. People reject this
- 3:50:59idea that someone can work 10 times or
- 3:51:01100 times harder. But I define work as
- 3:51:05output. And so for you to say that
- 3:51:07someone can't produce 10 times more than
- 3:51:09you is just factually false. There's
- 3:51:11tons of people who produce 10 times
- 3:51:13more. There's tons of people who produce
- 3:51:14100 times more than you. I'll give you
- 3:51:16the easiest example in the world. A lot
- 3:51:18of departments run on weekly cadences.
- 3:51:20They say do this thing by end of week.
- 3:51:22Often times you can ask that person how
- 3:51:24many hours will this really take you?
- 3:51:26And then that person will say something
- 3:51:27like I don't know three or four hours.
- 3:51:29You say okay well why don't you just get
- 3:51:31it done by noon. And then at noon you
- 3:51:33say okay what's the next thing gonna
- 3:51:35take? and they'd say, "Uh, probably
- 3:51:36another 3 or 4 hours." You say, "Cool,
- 3:51:38get it done by the end of the day." Now,
- 3:51:39from those two cycles, that would have
- 3:51:41normally taken 2 weeks or 14 days, but
- 3:51:44instead it got done in one. And so, just
- 3:51:46right there, you got something done. You
- 3:51:49got 14 times more done than the
- 3:51:52competitor who's doing things on a
- 3:51:53weekly basis. And so, this is how you
- 3:51:55drag the future to the present is that
- 3:51:57you're not focusing on how hard you're
- 3:51:58working, you're focusing how much you're
- 3:51:59getting done. You'd be amazed at how
- 3:52:02much better you get after you've done it
- 3:52:04a hundred times. If you want to win, do
- 3:52:07it again. I want to be clear. You don't
- 3:52:09just post a hundred videos in a row and
- 3:52:11see what happens. You post one, see what
- 3:52:13worked, and then try and do more of that
- 3:52:15thing. And so, the idea isn't just raw
- 3:52:18effort. It's raw effort with an
- 3:52:20improvement loop. And so I remember one
- 3:52:23of my favorite words that I have to
- 3:52:25teach sales guys because it's a very
- 3:52:26repetitive task to teach someone how to
- 3:52:28sell is great, do it again, great again.
- 3:52:34Great job again. And so it's that
- 3:52:36repetition that breeds the nuance of
- 3:52:38skill. And you want it to be so drilled
- 3:52:40into you that you no longer have to
- 3:52:43consciously think about how to do the
- 3:52:45thing because you can then do it as a
- 3:52:47natural skill so that you can move on to
- 3:52:49putting your attention to the next
- 3:52:50skill. So it's not just about learning
- 3:52:52how to do it once. It's about learning
- 3:52:53how to do it so many times that you
- 3:52:55don't have to think about doing it at
- 3:52:56all. Especially if you're starting out,
- 3:52:58your goal should not be passive income.
- 3:53:00Mainly because you don't have enough
- 3:53:01money for the passive income to mean
- 3:53:03anything. Instead, you should learn how
- 3:53:05to make money while you're awake before
- 3:53:07trying to learn how to make it while you
- 3:53:08sleep. You crawl, then you walk, then
- 3:53:11you run. Once you have more money than
- 3:53:13you can possibly reinvest in education
- 3:53:15and acquiring more skills, then you can
- 3:53:17take the leftover and put that into your
- 3:53:20passive income pool. And so, very, very
- 3:53:22tactically, this is what I'll walk you
- 3:53:23through. You should have an education
- 3:53:25investment budget. And so, just like you
- 3:53:27spend X dollars per month, so let's say
- 3:53:28you we pull all of your expenses down
- 3:53:30and you're making an extra $1,000 a
- 3:53:32month. Okay? Now, if you're not eating
- 3:53:34out, you're not buying new clothes,
- 3:53:35you're not going out with the boys,
- 3:53:37you're not spending money in stupid
- 3:53:38ways, that if that's what you're doing,
- 3:53:40then you're going to have $1,000 left.
- 3:53:42If you have that, then you can take that
- 3:53:44money and every month you can put it
- 3:53:46towards a bank account that you can
- 3:53:48either choose to immediately spend or
- 3:53:50save up for something that is more
- 3:53:51expensive. And I can tell you that a lot
- 3:53:54of what I learned when I when I bought
- 3:53:56programs and seminars and conferences
- 3:53:58and things like that wasn't even from
- 3:54:00the content itself, but it was
- 3:54:02connections that I was able to make at
- 3:54:03those types of events that I was then
- 3:54:06able to leverage the one skill I had,
- 3:54:08which I was good at sales, and then
- 3:54:10start giving that away to every person I
- 3:54:12met so that I could collect those IUs
- 3:54:14and then learn skills for free. And so
- 3:54:17it's like I really just needed a ticket
- 3:54:18to get in the room and then I could
- 3:54:20trade with everybody else with the
- 3:54:22skills I had to then get to learn
- 3:54:23theirs. And so as wild as this sounds,
- 3:54:26at the end of 2025, you could be dead
- 3:54:29broke but rich in skills. And so let's
- 3:54:31say at the end of next year, you
- 3:54:33actually have no more money, but you now
- 3:54:35have the ability to make more money. And
- 3:54:37so just like my father had to start over
- 3:54:39from nothing after losing everything, he
- 3:54:42didn't lose everything. He still had the
- 3:54:43most valuable thing he had, which is
- 3:54:45that he was a surgeon. And so he knew a
- 3:54:47skill and he could make it work here
- 3:54:49like he'd make it work there. And that
- 3:54:50is something that no divorce can take
- 3:54:52from you. No government can confiscate.
- 3:54:54And it's something that's with you till
- 3:54:55the day you die. And so that's how you
- 3:54:56get better. You keep going. You keep
- 3:54:59improving the feedback loops. You invest
- 3:55:01appropriately. And you keep going allin
- 3:55:03on you. We've eliminated everything
- 3:55:04that's bad. We've started something
- 3:55:06that's good. We've gotten even better at
- 3:55:08being goodter. And now finally, we've
- 3:55:10got to stick to it when it gets tough
- 3:55:12because it will. Here's something that's
- 3:55:14taken me way too long to learn. Staying
- 3:55:16focused is like beating addiction. It's
- 3:55:18not a one-time victory. You have to
- 3:55:20fight it all day, every day, then wake
- 3:55:23up and do it again tomorrow. Because the
- 3:55:25thing that's going to distract you is
- 3:55:26going to change every day. The thing
- 3:55:28that's going to trigger your addiction
- 3:55:29to distraction is going to keep morphing
- 3:55:33and changing its form so that it can
- 3:55:36steal or rob you of your future. And so,
- 3:55:38you have to be adaptable in knowing that
- 3:55:40you have to fight it every day. And so
- 3:55:42it's not good enough to just say, "I was
- 3:55:43focused for this week." You've got to
- 3:55:45wake up on the eighth day and the ninth
- 3:55:46day and do it again. And so, you
- 3:55:48remember that guy who uh got rich drop
- 3:55:51shipping and day trading and uh buying
- 3:55:53crypto and wholesaling all at the same
- 3:55:55time? Yeah. Me neither. Focus. To win in
- 3:55:59business, you need to be able to say no
- 3:56:02without remorse and hear no without a
- 3:56:05loss of enthusiasm. which means that you
- 3:56:08have to keep feeling rejection, keep
- 3:56:11failing, and keep going while being
- 3:56:15willing to reject basically everyone
- 3:56:18else. And that seems so counter because
- 3:56:19you're right there and you're like, man,
- 3:56:21I don't want to reject this person
- 3:56:22because I know what it feels like to be
- 3:56:23rejected. You need to be able to
- 3:56:25maintain this discrepancy so that you
- 3:56:27can create the space to do the work that
- 3:56:29needs doing. So, there have been a
- 3:56:30couple of lessons that I have learned
- 3:56:34over and over again in my career. I've
- 3:56:36had to relearn. So, it's a lot like a
- 3:56:38like a fine wine. It's like it it gets
- 3:56:40better with age and there's more nuance
- 3:56:42to the flavor. So, I think focus is not
- 3:56:45a are you focused or not. It's how
- 3:56:47focused are you? And you can measure
- 3:56:48someone's focus by again the quality and
- 3:56:50quantity of things that they say no to.
- 3:56:52Which means that as you get better, more
- 3:56:55opportunities will emerge, which is
- 3:56:57interesting because people who start out
- 3:56:59can't see opportunity anywhere. And it's
- 3:57:01because they have so few skills and so
- 3:57:02there's very few opportunities for them.
- 3:57:04When you have a lot of skills, there are
- 3:57:06so many opportunities that are in front
- 3:57:07of you that you feel like you're missing
- 3:57:10out. But the real opportunity is
- 3:57:13actually in solving the problems in
- 3:57:14front of you. I was able to, in my
- 3:57:17opinion, become another order of
- 3:57:20magnitude greater in terms of
- 3:57:21entrepreneurship, which I would just
- 3:57:22measure by wealth. Once I was able to
- 3:57:26learn to say no and accept that I would
- 3:57:30not be able to pursue the many things
- 3:57:32that I know I could crush because once
- 3:57:35you realize how much actual work it
- 3:57:37takes to make something good, you
- 3:57:39realize how few things you're actually
- 3:57:41going to be able to do in your entire
- 3:57:42life. And so this is why picking becomes
- 3:57:45so important. Right now, the things that
- 3:57:48you're going to have to say no to are
- 3:57:49really the distractions and kind of in
- 3:57:52some ways easy. Say no to fantasy
- 3:57:53football, saying no to drinking beers
- 3:57:55with the boys, going out with the club,
- 3:57:56whatever. But in a year from now, once
- 3:57:58you have more skills, there will be more
- 3:58:00opportunities. You're going to have
- 3:58:01multiple $10,000 a month income
- 3:58:03opportunities that you're going to have
- 3:58:04to say no to to stick with the one that
- 3:58:06you have. And then once that thing
- 3:58:07becomes a $100,000 a month thing that
- 3:58:08you're doing, you're going to have to
- 3:58:09start saying no to multiple $100,000 a
- 3:58:11month opportunities. And here's the
- 3:58:13thing with opportunities that come up.
- 3:58:15They only show you the upside and not
- 3:58:17the downside. You have to know where the
- 3:58:19skeletons are buried. You have to know
- 3:58:21where the bodies are. If you don't know,
- 3:58:23and I've gone through this this this
- 3:58:25visual because I think about it every
- 3:58:27single time I have to walk through not
- 3:58:30doing something. You are here. You see
- 3:58:33this new opportunity here. Then you
- 3:58:35understand the downsides here. Then you
- 3:58:38live the downsides. Then you experience
- 3:58:40the upside. Then you achieve your goal.
- 3:58:42And so this is the starting point. This
- 3:58:45is called uninformed optimism. This is
- 3:58:48now informed pessimism. This is the
- 3:58:50value of despair. And this is where most
- 3:58:53people quit. But what they do is they
- 3:58:55don't even quit because they don't want
- 3:58:56to say they quit. What they do is they
- 3:58:58start another one of these things and
- 3:59:00they say, "Oh, this is now my uninformed
- 3:59:02optimism." And then, "Oh, now I
- 3:59:04understand this more." But the thing is
- 3:59:06is that they never actually get through
- 3:59:07to this upside. And so they just keep
- 3:59:09jumping from thing to thing to thing
- 3:59:12over and over again. And so the reason
- 3:59:14it takes so long is because you're in a
- 3:59:16rush. Big things don't happen on small
- 3:59:18timelines because you have to start from
- 3:59:21zero over and over again. And if you
- 3:59:23actually stick with it, it's actually
- 3:59:24the shortest way to get to where you
- 3:59:26want to go. It just takes longer than
- 3:59:27you think. Must be easy for you to say
- 3:59:30is probably something that you might
- 3:59:31think by watching this or listening to
- 3:59:33this. And I like to tell this story
- 3:59:36because in July of 2017 is when I
- 3:59:40started my podcast. And it was 90 days
- 3:59:42after I lost everything the last time.
- 3:59:45And from that point until now, it's
- 3:59:49taken that period of time to get to over
- 3:59:51a million downloads a month. And for the
- 3:59:53first three years, and I was making
- 3:59:55multiple podcasts, so we're talking
- 3:59:56three 400 episodes. For the first few
- 3:59:59years, I never really cracked 3,000
- 4:00:01downloads a month. And so I could say,
- 4:00:04man, why is this taking so long? But the
- 4:00:06real real is that it took me that long
- 4:00:08to get good. It also being extra real
- 4:00:12took me that long to have proof on the
- 4:00:14outside that what I was saying was true
- 4:00:16on the inside. And right now, no one who
- 4:00:18listens to my podcast cares that it took
- 4:00:20me seven years to get here. They just
- 4:00:22cared that it's good today. And so
- 4:00:24people quit here when things get hard
- 4:00:26because the thought of something being
- 4:00:28hard forever is unbearable. They think
- 4:00:30that this line is just going to keep
- 4:00:32going this way forever. But it's not
- 4:00:35because once you fully understand all
- 4:00:37the bodies where the skeletons are
- 4:00:39hidden, then you can actually start
- 4:00:41solving them one by one. The thing is is
- 4:00:44that that distraction only is
- 4:00:46distracting because you don't know what
- 4:00:48sucks about it. You might think you know
- 4:00:50what sucks about it, but you don't know
- 4:00:51what sucks about it. And so the big
- 4:00:53difference is you have something called
- 4:00:56declarative versus procedural knowledge.
- 4:00:58And so there's two types of learning and
- 4:01:00this is actually formal. This is uh this
- 4:01:02is from academia. So you have
- 4:01:03declarative knowledge which is knowing
- 4:01:05about something.
- 4:01:07So if you go memorize a fact or you you
- 4:01:09you learn how private equity works,
- 4:01:11right? This is knowing about. The other
- 4:01:14type of knowledge is procedural
- 4:01:18which is knowing how to.
- 4:01:21And so a lot of people mistake
- 4:01:23declarative knowledge for procedural.
- 4:01:26And so they mistakenly think that if
- 4:01:28they watch 10 videos on doing a private
- 4:01:30equity deal that it means they
- 4:01:32understand how to do a private equity
- 4:01:33deal. Or they watch 10 videos on cold
- 4:01:35outbound and they think it means they
- 4:01:37understand how to do cold outbound or 10
- 4:01:39videos on sales and so forth. But you're
- 4:01:42never really going to learn how to do it
- 4:01:44until you do it. And so you're going to
- 4:01:46learn more from your first hundred cold
- 4:01:48calls or 100 cold knock on doors than
- 4:01:51you will from a hundred books or videos
- 4:01:53that you watch. But I have good news.
- 4:01:56Nothing hard lasts forever. There's only
- 4:01:59three things that can happen. You either
- 4:02:01quit, it gets easier, or you get better.
- 4:02:05So no matter what, it always ends. You
- 4:02:08only lose when you quit before you see
- 4:02:10it all the way through. And I think
- 4:02:11that's incredibly encouraging. So no
- 4:02:13matter how hard whatever it is that
- 4:02:15you're doing is, which by the way just
- 4:02:17means that your expectation doesn't
- 4:02:18match reality. But no matter how hard it
- 4:02:21is, you either quit, it gets easier
- 4:02:23because something changes externally or
- 4:02:26you get harder. Something changes
- 4:02:28internally. But no matter what, it will
- 4:02:30end. Think about it like you're you're
- 4:02:32mining for gold, right? You're you're
- 4:02:34chiseling away underground and you've
- 4:02:35got this pile of gold. You don't know
- 4:02:37how far away it is, but it's underground
- 4:02:38and you're digging towards it. This
- 4:02:40difficulty of swinging the the the
- 4:02:41pickaxe can end when one, you walk out
- 4:02:43of the mine and say there's, you know
- 4:02:45what, marketing doesn't work. Sure. The
- 4:02:48second is that all of a sudden you hit a
- 4:02:50soft patch and then you're like, "Oh my
- 4:02:52god, I'm digging so much faster now.
- 4:02:53This is great." And then you get to the
- 4:02:55gold. Or you just start swinging the axe
- 4:02:59harder because you get more muscled, you
- 4:03:01get more efficient with your movements,
- 4:03:02and you just keep chiseling away. Even
- 4:03:04if it goes from dirt to rock, you just
- 4:03:06keep chiseling away at a slower pace,
- 4:03:08but you eventually break through and get
- 4:03:10there. But in all three of those
- 4:03:12scenarios, hard doesn't last forever.
- 4:03:15And so I'll give you a little rule of
- 4:03:16thumb that I've seen on how do how do I
- 4:03:18do more of what's working, right? How do
- 4:03:19I keep going? When it's easy, do more.
- 4:03:22When it's hard, do different. And so I
- 4:03:25told this story years ago, and I'll tell
- 4:03:26you guys again. So when Gym Launch just
- 4:03:29barely started to work, all right, so
- 4:03:30I'm like 3 months into Gym Launch
- 4:03:32working. Guess what? Guess what
- 4:03:33brilliant Alex thought he should do? So
- 4:03:36I went to this meet up of 10
- 4:03:37entrepreneurs. All the entrepreneurs
- 4:03:38were eight figureure entrepreneurs, so
- 4:03:3910 million plus per year. I was not
- 4:03:41making that. I we were pacing probably
- 4:03:42three or $400,000 a month at the time.
- 4:03:44It was just me, Ila, and I think we had
- 4:03:46an assistant over kitchen sink, right?
- 4:03:48So, it was I was making the most money
- 4:03:50I'd ever made in my life and probably to
- 4:03:52this day because it was the most
- 4:03:53material change in my life by
- 4:03:55percentage. When you go from no money to
- 4:03:58hundreds of thousands a month within 90
- 4:03:59days, me looking at bankruptcy attorneys
- 4:04:016 months earlier to that, it's I can't I
- 4:04:04can't explain how crazy reality shifted.
- 4:04:07But I had this guy who came up to me
- 4:04:10after I gave my little presentation of
- 4:04:12like, hey, this is what's working. And
- 4:04:13so, of course, what I want to do now is
- 4:04:14start a supplement company. He came up
- 4:04:16to me and he said, "If what you're
- 4:04:18saying is true, if the economics of the
- 4:04:20business that you've outlined really do
- 4:04:22work as well as you say they do, when it
- 4:04:25gets easy is when you go hard. It's when
- 4:04:27you double down on what's working." And
- 4:04:30he said that to me, and I remember he
- 4:04:31said, "Because what's going to happen is
- 4:04:32that if it really works this well,
- 4:04:34someone bigger and better is going to
- 4:04:36take all your stuff and immediately try
- 4:04:38and do it with their distribution, their
- 4:04:40audience, and their leverage." And so if
- 4:04:43there's ever been a time to focus on the
- 4:04:45thing that's in front of you, it's right
- 4:04:47now. And I remember Leila and I felt
- 4:04:49this huge weight of pressure that
- 4:04:52started us at that point cuz literally I
- 4:04:54think I was I was really content for
- 4:04:55like 6 weeks and I was really thrilled.
- 4:04:58We had just gotten married. We're 6
- 4:04:59weeks into being, you know, married.
- 4:05:01We're making really good money. Uh she's
- 4:05:0323 or 24. I'm 26 or 27. So like we're
- 4:05:06young. I was like, "Holy cow, this is
- 4:05:08amazing." Our rent, for context, was
- 4:05:09$1,200 a month. I was taking home 400,
- 4:05:11right? Like, and so I've always lived
- 4:05:13far below my means. At this point,
- 4:05:15though, we went back home with the devil
- 4:05:18inside of us in terms of the fear of us
- 4:05:22losing everything that we had. And so,
- 4:05:24we basically worked around the clock
- 4:05:26like someone was trying to put us out of
- 4:05:27business. And the thing is is that
- 4:05:29people did eventually, but by the time
- 4:05:31they did, we had gone so far ahead that
- 4:05:34they were way behind us because we were
- 4:05:36working against a hypothetical enemy who
- 4:05:38was trying to destroy us, not the ones
- 4:05:40that were actually mediocre and
- 4:05:41distracted. When it's easy, do more.
- 4:05:44Once it starts working, put the blinders
- 4:05:47on and hit the gas. And I would
- 4:05:49challenge you with this tactical setup
- 4:05:52right now. If you've never worked for 30
- 4:05:54days straight, I would encourage you to
- 4:05:56try it. In China, there's something
- 4:05:58called the 996, which is basically the
- 4:06:01standard for Chinese tech work hours,
- 4:06:04which is you work 9:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m.
- 4:06:066 days a week. That's the bar. And so, I
- 4:06:09like to state that because we think we
- 4:06:11work so hard. That's just the average.
- 4:06:14And so, I would encourage you, remember
- 4:06:16hard times, hard men, right? Good times.
- 4:06:19Well, we need to act as though it's hard
- 4:06:21times because if you don't, you're
- 4:06:23surely going to become soft. My
- 4:06:25challenge for you is work 30 days
- 4:06:27straight. Work 10, work 12 hours a day,
- 4:06:3130 days straight. What you will realize
- 4:06:33at the end of this is one, how much work
- 4:06:36you can actually do. Two, that you're
- 4:06:38not going to die. You're not made of
- 4:06:40glass. And third, you'll know that you
- 4:06:42have that gear if the time calls for it.
- 4:06:45Now, I will be very real with you. I
- 4:06:48work more now than I have ever worked in
- 4:06:50my life. Save maybe when I opened my
- 4:06:53very first gym. So, I work in absolute
- 4:06:56hours more than I ever have. And I
- 4:06:58produced significantly more than I did
- 4:07:00then. And this year, I think I've taken
- 4:07:03something like 10 or 11 days off in
- 4:07:052024. I would measure a day off as any
- 4:07:09day where I worked probably fewer than
- 4:07:12four hours. I put this as context. And I
- 4:07:15had a I had a security guard who was
- 4:07:16here atacquisition.com
- 4:07:19earlier this year and he was talking to
- 4:07:21uh some of the younger guys on the team
- 4:07:23and he said you should never let Alex
- 4:07:26work more hours than you because he's
- 4:07:28already ahead of you. And so if you want
- 4:07:31to catch up with him certainly don't let
- 4:07:34him outwork you. Some of the hoodoo
- 4:07:38mental health whatever people are going
- 4:07:41to disagree with me. also don't give a
- 4:07:44[ __ ] And so the thing is is you can
- 4:07:47just go and make those mental health
- 4:07:49people happy or you can get what the
- 4:07:52[ __ ] you came here to get. You can do
- 4:07:55what you came to do. And I have found
- 4:07:57that in my life I've gotten
- 4:07:59significantly more purpose and more
- 4:08:00drive from a long day's hard work from
- 4:08:04earning my shower at the end of the day
- 4:08:07than anything that I've ever had from a
- 4:08:10pleasure- seeeking perspective. As much
- 4:08:12as it's great to go to the pool for a
- 4:08:14day and hang out with some people or
- 4:08:16maybe just watch movies, as great as
- 4:08:19that may be, there's nothing that I get
- 4:08:21more filming out of than knowing that at
- 4:08:25the end of a day that I work 16 straight
- 4:08:27hours that I have some product that I
- 4:08:29pulled out of my brain and into the
- 4:08:31world that this thing got life. Now,
- 4:08:34looking back on the best days of my
- 4:08:36life, it was those types of days. And so
- 4:08:39when I realized that, I stopped trying
- 4:08:41to satisfy what everyone else told me my
- 4:08:43life was supposed to be like. They're
- 4:08:44like, "You should take vacations." I
- 4:08:46took my first vacation this year, and it
- 4:08:49was supposed to be a two-day vacation,
- 4:08:51and Leila and I left after one. Because
- 4:08:53what happened was I got there at this
- 4:08:56beautiful resort,5 or $10,000 a night,
- 4:08:58very expensive. And I I say that just to
- 4:08:59say that it was ritzy, right? It was
- 4:09:01luxurious. I get there, I sit out on the
- 4:09:04back of this beautiful patio for this
- 4:09:05really expensive room and I look out on
- 4:09:08this, you know, mountain view and I
- 4:09:10think to myself, this is beautiful and I
- 4:09:14don't care. I wish I felt something. And
- 4:09:17all I wanted was to get back in the
- 4:09:19game. And so I realized that even that
- 4:09:22little mini vacation was something that
- 4:09:24I had done because I thought it was an
- 4:09:26expectation. It was unspoken or spoken
- 4:09:28from someone else in my life. And so I
- 4:09:30have this quote that I live by which is
- 4:09:32if you don't know why you believe what
- 4:09:34you believe it's not your belief it's
- 4:09:36someone else's at that time it's like I
- 4:09:38had this belief that I should take a
- 4:09:41vacation but why now if I can't explain
- 4:09:44it which I really can't then I shouldn't
- 4:09:46do it and now I want to be very clear
- 4:09:49this doesn't mean that there's no time
- 4:09:50for rest but I like to think about the
- 4:09:52hypothetical extremes I like to think
- 4:09:54about the 996 that is just the standard
- 4:09:57in China and I like to think about
- 4:09:59people in the middle ages in the dark
- 4:10:01ages. They worked above their shop and
- 4:10:04they didn't have like the 7-day or 5day
- 4:10:06work week is something that was invented
- 4:10:08in the last hundred years. This is not
- 4:10:10pointing to your human capacity. This is
- 4:10:12pointing to a societal constraint. I
- 4:10:15think that a truly liberated individual
- 4:10:17operates purely from first principles of
- 4:10:20what do I want? What does it take to get
- 4:10:22it? And then what are the things that
- 4:10:24hold me back? And those those things
- 4:10:26that hold you back are going to be
- 4:10:27physical constraints. You can't operate
- 4:10:29without sleep. Not for an extended
- 4:10:30period of time. So, I'm not saying don't
- 4:10:32sleep. Sleep as much as you can. I'm not
- 4:10:34saying that you can work physical labor
- 4:10:37all hours of the day without rest. You
- 4:10:39need rest. And sometimes you need mental
- 4:10:40rest, which is different than physical
- 4:10:42rest. And that's okay. So, if you need,
- 4:10:44and I'm going to put need in quotes
- 4:10:45here, if your way of unplugging is
- 4:10:48watching Netflix, cool. If your way of
- 4:10:50unplugging is gardening, cool. If your
- 4:10:51way of unplugging is working out, cool.
- 4:10:54Do what works for you. But
- 4:10:55fundamentally, the goal is to increase
- 4:10:57total net output over the longest period
- 4:10:59of time. And so, it's not about, okay,
- 4:11:02I'm going to work 24 hours straight.
- 4:11:04Well, you're actually going to take from
- 4:11:05tomorrow. So, your net output over two
- 4:11:06days is going to be much worse. And so,
- 4:11:09it's really balancing that. And I
- 4:11:11learned that much later in life. I was
- 4:11:13able to get significantly more out of
- 4:11:15myself working seven days a week and
- 4:11:17working 10 hours, 12 hours on those days
- 4:11:20rather than working, call it, 18 every
- 4:11:23day. That was for me a little bit too
- 4:11:26much. Now I have had seasons where I
- 4:11:28call it three shifts. So basically I
- 4:11:30work 6:00 to noon, noon to 6:00, and
- 4:11:32then I work 6 to basically sleep time
- 4:11:35when I get back home. I only usually
- 4:11:37have to go into that gear probably once
- 4:11:41a year for maybe 6 weeks to 8 weeks is
- 4:11:43when I have to go into the third shift.
- 4:11:45But most of the times I can pretty much
- 4:11:47sustain 12 hours of work a day kind of
- 4:11:49indefinitely. I bring this up to kind of
- 4:11:52set the bar for at least where I'm at.
- 4:11:54So maybe you have some sort of
- 4:11:55benchmark. But if you're wanting to get
- 4:11:58ahead, I can promise you working less is
- 4:12:00probably not the way to do it.
- 4:12:02Especially when you don't have as many
- 4:12:03skills because the fewer skills that you
- 4:12:05have, the more labor or volume you have
- 4:12:08to compensate with in order to make up
- 4:12:10for the ineffectiveness per unit of time
- 4:12:12you work. And so in the beginning is
- 4:12:15when you actually have to work the most,
- 4:12:16but in the end is when you want to work
- 4:12:18the most because of how much more you're
- 4:12:20getting for it. So my team wanted me to
- 4:12:22make this point because they've
- 4:12:23obviously seen me work and they're like,
- 4:12:24I don't think this is coming through in
- 4:12:26this video, which is that I have an
- 4:12:27obsession with speed. This seems kind of
- 4:12:30weird in just position with patience,
- 4:12:31but this is the very classic micro
- 4:12:33speed, macro patience, you know,
- 4:12:35whatever whatever whatever is you
- 4:12:36prefer. The idea is though that you want
- 4:12:39to pull reality forward. And so I always
- 4:12:41like to break things down, whether it's
- 4:12:43me or my team, into how many hours and
- 4:12:45minutes something's going to take. And
- 4:12:46then I like to stack those things back
- 4:12:48and forth. And rather than using
- 4:12:50arbitrary deadlines of, okay, let's get
- 4:12:52this done by next week, you use actual
- 4:12:54deadlines based on how long it should
- 4:12:55take. And then when you find out how
- 4:12:57long something takes, you then ask the
- 4:12:59next question, which is how can I make
- 4:13:00this take less time? How can I automate
- 4:13:02this thing? How can I automate portions
- 4:13:03of this work? How can I how can I give
- 4:13:05away chunks of this? How can I deem some
- 4:13:07of this unnecessary? And so that
- 4:13:10continuous cutting and pulling forward
- 4:13:12of tasks is how you can move so much
- 4:13:15faster through life and towards your
- 4:13:17goals. And so I have this weird mental
- 4:13:19belief that there's like this this big
- 4:13:22path in front of me that I have all
- 4:13:24these skills that I have to achieve to
- 4:13:26hit these milestones that is laid out on
- 4:13:28this time span. And so I reject the
- 4:13:30timeline, but I accept the skills. And
- 4:13:33so the idea is like, okay, it's like I'm
- 4:13:35a Pac-Man of like eating those little
- 4:13:36dots and each of those dots is a skill.
- 4:13:38It's like I want to pull it towards me
- 4:13:39as fast as I can so I can so I can
- 4:13:41ingest the skills and basically power up
- 4:13:44myself faster because I know that these
- 4:13:46skills are requisites. I can't move on
- 4:13:48to calculus without knowing arithmetic.
- 4:13:50I can't move on to calculus without
- 4:13:51knowing algebra. There's no way around
- 4:13:52it. But I can choose to learn algebra
- 4:13:55faster. And so then it's like, okay,
- 4:13:58what is required to learn algebra? Oh,
- 4:14:00and if I do more problems faster than
- 4:14:02the standard person, then I'll get there
- 4:14:04faster. And so if the class says, "Okay,
- 4:14:06I need you to do these 10 problem sets
- 4:14:08and they're due next week." Well, then
- 4:14:10how long does it take for me to do those
- 4:14:12problems, maybe 30 minutes, then why
- 4:14:14can't I do my second lesson 30 minutes
- 4:14:16later and then do another 10 problems
- 4:14:17and do my third lesson 30 minutes after
- 4:14:20that and do another 10 problems? Well,
- 4:14:21if that's the case, then I can do an
- 4:14:23entire year's worth of work in a week.
- 4:14:26And this is how in my opinion pulling
- 4:14:29forward is one of those things that I've
- 4:14:31seen so many of the most successful
- 4:14:33entrepreneurs do is they simply question
- 4:14:36timelines
- 4:14:37aggressively and ruthlessly eliminate
- 4:14:40any waste or gap between the actions
- 4:14:43required to win and everything else.
- 4:14:45Honestly, I think the things that I'm
- 4:14:47working on right now for my skills are
- 4:14:50I'm learning how to
- 4:14:53reinforce
- 4:14:55cultural norms. across a company that
- 4:14:57continues to scale which I define as the
- 4:15:01rules that govern reinforcement in an
- 4:15:03organization. That is the culture and
- 4:15:06those are both spoken and unspoken
- 4:15:08rules. And when I say rules, I mean when
- 4:15:10someone does this, they get a pat on the
- 4:15:12butt. When someone does this, they get
- 4:15:15uh chastised or they get a ding, right?
- 4:15:17And the thing is is that people like to
- 4:15:19say they have a good culture here, but
- 4:15:22the culture is is is hundred a thousand
- 4:15:25unspoken rules and that's why it takes
- 4:15:27people time to learn and figure out what
- 4:15:29the culture is when they go somewhere
- 4:15:31new. You can give someone a list of
- 4:15:33aundred rules and if you were very
- 4:15:35granular, you could figure it out. The
- 4:15:37problem is that the culture changes
- 4:15:38based on the people who change the
- 4:15:39reinforcers. And so that means that the
- 4:15:42culture in a team could be different
- 4:15:44than the culture in the company because
- 4:15:45the person who's closest to them uh
- 4:15:47manages it differently. And so that
- 4:15:49changes the behavior. And so that's why
- 4:15:51a sales team can have a different
- 4:15:52culture than a marketing team, a
- 4:15:53different culture than a finance team,
- 4:15:54different culture than an HR team. And
- 4:15:56so I'd say right now a big focus of me
- 4:15:58of mine is trying to standardize the
- 4:16:01rules that govern reinforcement across
- 4:16:03an organization that scales and making
- 4:16:04sure that everyone is aligned with that
- 4:16:07style of work. The second thing that I'm
- 4:16:10working on right now is basically the
- 4:16:12highest level of recruiting. And
- 4:16:14recruiting and talent is actually kind
- 4:16:17of like focus where it's one of those
- 4:16:19skills that I don't think you ever
- 4:16:21master. You just keep learning how many
- 4:16:23more levels there are to it. It's like
- 4:16:24right when you finish it, you realize
- 4:16:25that you're at a sub peak and there's
- 4:16:27actually another peak beyond it. The
- 4:16:28missed lifts and then you see the next
- 4:16:29steps. And so like focus, I thought,
- 4:16:32"Oh, I was focused at $100,000 a month
- 4:16:34because I could turn these opportunities
- 4:16:35down." And then you got some even sexier
- 4:16:37opportunities. You got to learn how to
- 4:16:38say no to those. So the same thing
- 4:16:39happens with talent is that you're
- 4:16:41willing to tolerate a certain amount of
- 4:16:42mediocrity at one level. That is no
- 4:16:45longer tolerable at a level above that.
- 4:16:46And the types of people that you bring
- 4:16:48in, you have a higher standard, a higher
- 4:16:50bar for those people and attracting them
- 4:16:51in the process associated with getting
- 4:16:53them to buy into your culture, your
- 4:16:54vision, and getting them to take their
- 4:16:56skills and apply them to your
- 4:16:57opportunity is a skill set that I am
- 4:16:59working on now because fundamentally I
- 4:17:01have a belief which is the best talent
- 4:17:02is always yet to come. And that's
- 4:17:04predicated on the idea that if I get
- 4:17:05better, my opportunity will get better
- 4:17:07and that will attract more people and
- 4:17:09better people. And I bring this up
- 4:17:11because I basically want to translate
- 4:17:13one thing, which is that the
- 4:17:15reinvestment in learning skills never
- 4:17:18ends. And so Charlie Mer said this, you
- 4:17:21just have to be a lifelong student. You
- 4:17:23have to be willing and want to learn. So
- 4:17:25I actually had um an example of this. So
- 4:17:27recently there was somebody on uh teams.
- 4:17:28I did a bunch of one-on- ones uh over
- 4:17:30the last week cuz I was looking at one
- 4:17:31of the departments and uh one of the one
- 4:17:34of the guys said, "Hey, I have this
- 4:17:35particular skill. I was hoping that we
- 4:17:36could eventually have a a role that only
- 4:17:39does this thing." And I said, "You know,
- 4:17:41it's interesting that you that you ask
- 4:17:43or you make that request because if I
- 4:17:45were you, I would not think that way at
- 4:17:47all. I would think how could I learn 10
- 4:17:50more skills." Rather than how can the
- 4:17:52organization meet my demands, it should
- 4:17:54be how can I let my skills meet the
- 4:17:57demands of the existing business. It's
- 4:17:59asking reality to meet you where you're
- 4:18:00at rather than meeting reality where it
- 4:18:02is. And I think that too many people do
- 4:18:04this. Why can't the world insert be more
- 4:18:08convenient for me? Well, the world is
- 4:18:10uncaring and doesn't care about you at
- 4:18:11all. And underlying underpinning that
- 4:18:14statement is the entitlement is the
- 4:18:15expectation that it somehow should. And
- 4:18:17I think that is a poverty lens. And so
- 4:18:19the wealthy accept the world for what it
- 4:18:21is and then choose to maximize and
- 4:18:23adapt. Everyone else tries to stomp
- 4:18:26their feet and throw tantrums and say
- 4:18:27how it's not fair. And they're right.
- 4:18:29And so what? There's a Haitian proverb
- 4:18:32that has nothing to do with cats and
- 4:18:33dogs that I think is relevant right now,
- 4:18:36which is behind mountains are more
- 4:18:38mountains. Goals aren't finish lines,
- 4:18:42they're mile markers. And I think that's
- 4:18:44a great mental frame, which is that you
- 4:18:47think that your goal is to get to
- 4:18:49$10,000 a month or $100,000 a month or
- 4:18:51million a month or 10 million a month,
- 4:18:53whatever your goal is. And I can promise
- 4:18:55you, having hit those, you just move it
- 4:18:58again. You just the mist lifts when you
- 4:19:00get there and you realize there's
- 4:19:01another mountain top. But where people
- 4:19:03lose their way is when they start
- 4:19:04listening to people at the bottom of the
- 4:19:05mountain who see them at the subhead and
- 4:19:08say, "You weren't happy last time when
- 4:19:09you got to the last peak. Why are you
- 4:19:11going to be happy the next time?" But
- 4:19:12that's under their assumption in their
- 4:19:14poverty lens that you did it to get to
- 4:19:16the mountaintop. You did it for the
- 4:19:18climb and they'll never understand that
- 4:19:21and don't expect them to. I remember I
- 4:19:23was trying to understand this person who
- 4:19:26had made this really irrational decision
- 4:19:27and I kept thinking like how how does
- 4:19:29this decision make sense and I was I was
- 4:19:31talking to my father actually and he
- 4:19:33said you're trying to apply logic to
- 4:19:37someone who's illogical and that itself
- 4:19:40is illogical and I remember thinking
- 4:19:43about that is that like there are these
- 4:19:44people in our lives that say these
- 4:19:46things that you're like I don't
- 4:19:46understand why they'd say that and then
- 4:19:48you try and make sense of it but the
- 4:19:50effort of trying to make sense of
- 4:19:52somebody who doesn't make sense is
- 4:19:53nonsensical. And so if it doesn't make
- 4:19:56sense to you, ignore it because they're
- 4:19:58going to disappear anyways. One of the
- 4:20:00things that has been true in my life is
- 4:20:02that the lazy don't know how to start,
- 4:20:05the losers don't know how to finish, and
- 4:20:07the legends don't know how to stop. And
- 4:20:10if I look at that, the lazy, the loser,
- 4:20:11the legends, I know which one I would
- 4:20:13rather be. And I also say that as
- 4:20:15somebody who doesn't believe in legacy
- 4:20:18or anything after we die. So, this is
- 4:20:20tactical. Find what works, do more of
- 4:20:23what works, find the thing that's
- 4:20:25preventing you from doing more of what
- 4:20:27works, solve that thing, and get back to
- 4:20:29doing more of what works. Then repeat.
- 4:20:32And so, the reality is that in health,
- 4:20:34marriage, business, or any game worth
- 4:20:36playing, you don't win by winning. You
- 4:20:38win by staying alive long enough that
- 4:20:41you outlast everyone else. So I will
- 4:20:43give you the advice that I gave a
- 4:20:45subgroup in school that we picked a
- 4:20:47100red people who had applied out of 500
- 4:20:49plus to basically do a 90-day sprint to
- 4:20:52help them start a school community. So
- 4:20:53we wanted to do a more in-depth kind of
- 4:20:55training things like that for this
- 4:20:56special group so that we could see if
- 4:20:58this new implementation yielded better
- 4:21:00results. And so the guy who we had
- 4:21:02running the group asked me he's like can
- 4:21:03you give any kind of like words of
- 4:21:04wisdom to these guys before we kick it
- 4:21:06off? And so this is what I told them.
- 4:21:08Number one follow instructions. Number
- 4:21:11two, when you reach something that you
- 4:21:12don't understand how to do, Google
- 4:21:15first. Number three, when you figure it
- 4:21:17out, post it. Others also may have
- 4:21:20struggled. Four, actually follow the
- 4:21:23rule of 100 daily, which is that you
- 4:21:25reach out to a 100 people, you make a
- 4:21:27post that you spent 100 minutes on,
- 4:21:29spend $100 plus on ads, and you spend at
- 4:21:32least 100 minutes a day making and
- 4:21:34improving ads and researching ads. As
- 4:21:36long as you do those things consistently
- 4:21:38and you get better, you will see
- 4:21:41results. And the amount of you that I
- 4:21:42see who tag me in like day four, day 20,
- 4:21:45day 30, the guys who are at day 60 of
- 4:21:47rule of 100 are like, I have more
- 4:21:49business than I can possibly handle. The
- 4:21:50problem is no one sticks with anything.
- 4:21:52And this is why I want you to stick with
- 4:21:54it. Rule number five, you will be
- 4:21:55excited for a week, then excitement will
- 4:21:58end, and that is where the work begins.
- 4:22:01Six, your work works on you more than
- 4:22:03you work on it. You are the product
- 4:22:06that's getting built more than anything
- 4:22:08that you're actually putting into your
- 4:22:09business. Remember that. Seven,
- 4:22:12everything is unscalable in the
- 4:22:14beginning. That's the point. It's how
- 4:22:16you learn every piece of it. And once
- 4:22:18you learn every piece of it, people will
- 4:22:20call you an expert. Eight, the pain of
- 4:22:22repetition is what forces you to seek
- 4:22:24improvement. When you figure out ways to
- 4:22:27get more for what you do, you've gained
- 4:22:29skill. People want to avoid the pain.
- 4:22:32One of my favorite bodybuilding coaches,
- 4:22:34Milo Sachev, talks about this in the
- 4:22:37context of how to grow a muscle. He
- 4:22:39says, "Find the pain." And then he'll
- 4:22:42just shout, he'll be like, "Suffer.
- 4:22:43Suffer." He's like, "Stay there. Find
- 4:22:45the pain." Because the thing is is that
- 4:22:47that pain is what forces you to change.
- 4:22:50And so if you encounter the pain and
- 4:22:53then say, "Oh, it's not working." That's
- 4:22:55the pain that you need to lean into.
- 4:22:57Because when it's not working is what
- 4:22:58will force you to do an improvement. And
- 4:23:01that's how you get good at making better
- 4:23:04content, get good at making better ads,
- 4:23:06get good at having more effective
- 4:23:08reachouts on different channels,
- 4:23:09whatever. It's that pain that forces you
- 4:23:11to improve. Nine, if you complain, you
- 4:23:14are dead to me. And I said this because
- 4:23:18I believe it. Like there is nothing
- 4:23:21weaker and more helpless and that has
- 4:23:24lower agency than someone who simply
- 4:23:26complains about what has occurred. It's
- 4:23:29something that happened in the past or
- 4:23:31is in front of them in the present. And
- 4:23:33regardless, complaining literally does
- 4:23:36nothing. It's a net zero. It's a net
- 4:23:38loss. You both lose the energy that you
- 4:23:42could have spent improving. And you also
- 4:23:44lose respect from every single person
- 4:23:46that you complain to. And they will
- 4:23:48associate the complaints with you. They
- 4:23:51won't remember what you complain about,
- 4:23:53only that you complain. 10. Literally
- 4:23:57thousands of people have already
- 4:23:58succeeded. You are not special. Repeat
- 4:24:02the same activities and you will be able
- 4:24:03to repeat the same outcomes. Before you
- 4:24:06make a conclusion that something doesn't
- 4:24:07work, I want you to state the objective
- 4:24:09truth of what you're claiming. You're
- 4:24:11like, "Facebook ads don't work." Sure.
- 4:24:14So the 400 billion a year in advertising
- 4:24:17that gets spent on Facebook just somehow
- 4:24:19doesn't work. People aren't doing it
- 4:24:20because it's not working. Cold outbound
- 4:24:22doesn't work. Yeah. So, the gazillion
- 4:24:24companies that do 10,000 emails, 10,000
- 4:24:26calls a day, they just it just it
- 4:24:29doesn't work. What you have to reframe
- 4:24:31it as is, I don't know how to make it
- 4:24:34work. I am not good enough to know how
- 4:24:37to make it work because you're not
- 4:24:39making as much money as you want because
- 4:24:40you're not as good as you think you are.
- 4:24:4211. Write down every reason that you're
- 4:24:44going to stick with it. Put it in front
- 4:24:46of you and revisit it when you need a
- 4:24:49reminder of why to stick with it. 12.
- 4:24:51Business is shockingly simple but
- 4:24:53surprisingly hard. The hard comes in the
- 4:24:56form of consistency. The moment you
- 4:24:58don't want to do it or just skip today
- 4:25:01is the day you realize what hard
- 4:25:03actually feels like. Learn to endure,
- 4:25:06overcome.
- 4:25:0713. Just win. Because at the end of the
- 4:25:11day, all of this hardship will be
- 4:25:13forgotten. It will fade into your
- 4:25:15memory. And so know that as you're going
- 4:25:17through it, you're actually just going
- 4:25:18to disproportionately in your memory
- 4:25:20remember the good stuff and not the bad
- 4:25:21stuff. I only have a few glimpses in my
- 4:25:25memory of the time when I was sleeping
- 4:25:26on the floor and I and I, you know, had
- 4:25:28my gym and I was getting started and I
- 4:25:29remember being so tired that like a good
- 4:25:30night's sleep couldn't fix it. I
- 4:25:32remember that. But it's almost like I
- 4:25:34remember the words that I told myself
- 4:25:36more than I even remember the
- 4:25:37experiences because it was so long ago.
- 4:25:39things will get better and you will
- 4:25:40remember the betterness more than you
- 4:25:42remember the suffering because the
- 4:25:43betterness will carry over in today
- 4:25:45which will always be fresher for you
- 4:25:46than how long ago the suffering may have
- 4:25:48been. The best time to work on improving
- 4:25:50your business was last year. The second
- 4:25:51best time is today so you might as well
- 4:25:53get started. So if you're a business
- 4:25:54owner and you'd like to scale, I'd like
- 4:25:56to invite you out to my headquarters for
- 4:25:57one of our scaling workshops where we
- 4:25:59help identify and solve your number one
- 4:26:01constraint so you can start the year
- 4:26:03with lots of momentum. So, it's two days
- 4:26:06again at my headquarters with my team
- 4:26:08talking about your business. And so, if
- 4:26:10that sounds at all interesting, click
- 4:26:11the link below, book a call with my
- 4:26:13team, and if you're a fit, we'd love to
- 4:26:14see you out of here. Most of my success
- 4:26:15in business has come from finding and
- 4:26:17exploiting unfair advantages. Here are
- 4:26:2015 lessons on finding and leveraging
- 4:26:22yours. So, let's start with number one.
- 4:26:24Pain is the price of progress.
- 4:26:27The fastest growth periods are often the
- 4:26:29most miserable. If you want to progress,
- 4:26:32get used to pain. If you think about
- 4:26:34what actually occurs when you grow, you
- 4:26:36stretch past your point of comfort. So
- 4:26:38even if you're growing a muscle, like
- 4:26:40you stretch it, you break it down, it's
- 4:26:41painful. If you have growing pains, like
- 4:26:44as a kid, it's like you grew too fast
- 4:26:45and your joints are in a lot of pain. If
- 4:26:47you're a company and you expand, this is
- 4:26:50technically supposed to be good stuff,
- 4:26:51but it doesn't make it any less painful.
- 4:26:53Elite athletes don't get stronger during
- 4:26:56easy workouts. If we want progress, we
- 4:26:59must accept the price of pain that's
- 4:27:02attached to it. You cannot both want
- 4:27:04progress and live an easy life. These
- 4:27:06two things conflict. Number two, happy
- 4:27:09but not satisfied. So, let me explain
- 4:27:12this. So, you're allowed to be happy
- 4:27:14before you hit your goal, just not
- 4:27:17satisfied. And so, there's a very big
- 4:27:19difference between being content with
- 4:27:20your life, content with your work, and
- 4:27:22complacent, meaning you're not going to
- 4:27:23take any more action. There's this great
- 4:27:25Haitian proverb, which is behind
- 4:27:27mountains are more mountains. It's kind
- 4:27:29of like after every peak, you can just
- 4:27:31see more peaks ahead of you. The work
- 4:27:33works on you more than you work on it.
- 4:27:35For me, I remember I had a year that I
- 4:27:37basically went into retirement trying to
- 4:27:38figure out what I wanted to do. And the
- 4:27:40thesis that I came out with was that
- 4:27:42hard work is the goal. And so, the fact
- 4:27:44that there's something that happens as a
- 4:27:46result of hard work is really just a
- 4:27:48secondary effect. It's a consequence,
- 4:27:50but the goal is the work itself. I, you
- 4:27:52know, I had a friend this morning who
- 4:27:54messaged me. They're like, "Why do you
- 4:27:55still work?" And I was like, "Because
- 4:27:56it's the thing that I enjoy doing most."
- 4:27:58And when I looked back on my life, when
- 4:27:59I didn't work, I was bored and felt
- 4:28:02depressed. And when I do work, I am
- 4:28:05stressed, but I do have moments that I
- 4:28:07really enjoy as well. I took this as a
- 4:28:09kind of a foundational truth for me, not
- 4:28:11for everyone, that there is misery on
- 4:28:12both sides. So, I might as well be
- 4:28:14productive and useful. And the only way
- 4:28:15to be productive and useful is to be
- 4:28:17happy about the process, but not
- 4:28:19satisfied so you can continue to provide
- 4:28:22value to the world. Now, number three,
- 4:28:25ignore critics. Now, this is probably
- 4:28:27easy to say, hard to do. So, let me let
- 4:28:31me break this down a little bit more.
- 4:28:32So, friendly reminder that most people
- 4:28:35are fat, poor pansies. Don't listen to
- 4:28:37them when they try to deter you from
- 4:28:39doing whatever it takes to succeed. So,
- 4:28:41the average person will always try to
- 4:28:43keep you average. It makes sense that if
- 4:28:45you want to be extraordinary, you will
- 4:28:47do things that an ordinary person would
- 4:28:49see as extra, right? [laughter] And so a
- 4:28:52lot of people, and this is this is the
- 4:28:54really hard part that I had to come to
- 4:28:55terms with, is that a lot of people want
- 4:28:57to see you fail because it justifies the
- 4:28:58risk that they chose not to take. We
- 4:29:00always have to think about listening to
- 4:29:01the people who are closest to our goals,
- 4:29:02not closest to us. And if you want a
- 4:29:05more violent version of this, your
- 4:29:07critics are going to eventually die and
- 4:29:10their opinion isn't going to matter
- 4:29:12then, which means it probably also
- 4:29:14doesn't matter now. So, might as well do
- 4:29:17what you wanted to do originally. Number
- 4:29:18four, selective productivity.
- 4:29:24Productivity comes from all the things
- 4:29:26that you choose not to do. I'm going to
- 4:29:28define two more terms for you because I
- 4:29:29think it's important. I see commitment
- 4:29:31as the elimination of alternatives. So,
- 4:29:33if I get married, then I eliminate all
- 4:29:35alternatives to the person that I'm
- 4:29:37married to. Right? That is commitment,
- 4:29:39right? Which is very similar to focus.
- 4:29:41Focus, if you think of the hypothetical
- 4:29:43extreme of focus, is that somebody does
- 4:29:45literally nothing but one thing. So they
- 4:29:46don't eat, they don't sleep, they would
- 4:29:48eventually die, but they would be 100%
- 4:29:50focused during the time that they were
- 4:29:51alive, right? Obviously, we have to put
- 4:29:52a couple things in. You have to eat
- 4:29:54food, you have to sleep, right? But the
- 4:29:56most focused person does the fewest
- 4:29:58things outside of the thing they're
- 4:29:59focused on. Focus is about the number of
- 4:30:02things that you say no to. Having this
- 4:30:05framework is, in my opinion, more
- 4:30:08powerful for productivity than just
- 4:30:09about anything else. Right? People are
- 4:30:10always trying to figure out like
- 4:30:12productivity hacks, but they want to add
- 4:30:14things to their lives to become more
- 4:30:15productive, which is completely counter
- 4:30:17to what focus even means. It's getting
- 4:30:19rid of everything that's not the thing
- 4:30:21is how you focus. Now, part of that also
- 4:30:23means environmentally, right? So, if you
- 4:30:25like have a window that you look outside
- 4:30:26of and you've got people who walk past
- 4:30:28your office and people can knock on the
- 4:30:29door or you've got slack notifications,
- 4:30:31of course, you're not focused because
- 4:30:32all of those things are not the work.
- 4:30:34So, I'm going to give you an analogy
- 4:30:35here. So, imagine there's a wall that
- 4:30:37you have to get over. All right? In
- 4:30:39order to you have to get a critical mass
- 4:30:40to get above this wall, right? And so
- 4:30:43you start putting up, you know, these
- 4:30:45ladders
- 4:30:46against the wall to try and climb over
- 4:30:48the wall. All right, this should make
- 4:30:50some sense. But as you try to build up
- 4:30:53the the little rungs of the ladder, so
- 4:30:55you put four rungs up. Well, you're not
- 4:30:57going to get the critical mass required
- 4:30:58to get over the hump to actually get the
- 4:31:00success you want. But the idea, the
- 4:31:02fallacy is that, oh, I'll just do all
- 4:31:05three or four of these things and I'll
- 4:31:07see which one works. When the reality is
- 4:31:09that any of them work, but none of them
- 4:31:10will work unless you work on one. And
- 4:31:13so, we have to take these four rungs
- 4:31:15that we're able to build and say, you
- 4:31:16know what, we're not going to do that.
- 4:31:17We're going to put that rung here cuz
- 4:31:19I'm going to take that time that I'm
- 4:31:20putting for my second opportunity, put
- 4:31:21it here. I'm gonna take this rung and
- 4:31:23put it right here. And then I'm gonna
- 4:31:25take this rugg and what do you know? I
- 4:31:27can get over this hump on top and I can
- 4:31:30get to the other side of the wall, which
- 4:31:31of course is where all the money and all
- 4:31:33the happiness and all the, you know, the
- 4:31:35girls uh with, you know, beautiful,
- 4:31:37beautiful hair. Look at this beautiful
- 4:31:38hair, right? This beautiful hair. Now
- 4:31:40she looks like a bug. Anyways, uh hold
- 4:31:42on. There you go.
- 4:31:46What's crazy is that this literally
- 4:31:47happens at all levels of business. Like
- 4:31:49people who are starting out trying to
- 4:31:50start five things, people who are at
- 4:31:51like their second or fifth year. I
- 4:31:53talked to a guy last night who has a
- 4:31:55really good business, really good
- 4:31:56margin, 50% margins, has great revenue
- 4:31:58retention. He was in cyber uh security.
- 4:32:00People stay with him, people pay. He has
- 4:32:01no problem getting customers. He has no
- 4:32:03problem delivering on them. I was like,
- 4:32:03"What's the problem?" He's like, "Me?"
- 4:32:05He said, "I just I get bored." He's
- 4:32:06like, "I just want to start more
- 4:32:07things." And I'm like, "Yeah, you got to
- 4:32:09stop that." Like, it's like the thing is
- 4:32:12is think about how much more successful
- 4:32:14you'd be. So, zoom all the way out.
- 4:32:16Think of somebody who gets better every
- 4:32:18single year and works on the same
- 4:32:21project for 20 years. you'd be like, "My
- 4:32:23god, that guy's probably really [ __ ]
- 4:32:25good." And what's interesting about this
- 4:32:26is that it doesn't matter what project
- 4:32:29the person works on, you do 20 years of
- 4:32:31reps and you do nothing else, you're
- 4:32:32going to be good. And so, if you know
- 4:32:35that that's a that's a fact, that's a
- 4:32:36certainty that you're going to be good
- 4:32:38with 20 years of practice, then the
- 4:32:40objective is to just get 20 years of
- 4:32:42practice in one thing and stick with it.
- 4:32:44So, like, your plans aren't working
- 4:32:46because the plans are wrong. The plans
- 4:32:48aren't working because you're not
- 4:32:49working on the plan. The hard part about
- 4:32:51the plan is not creating the plan or
- 4:32:54even following the plan. It's sticking
- 4:32:56with the plan. That's the hard part. All
- 4:32:58right. Number five, fear
- 4:33:02versus regret. So change is scary, but
- 4:33:04so is regret. And so the life you live
- 4:33:07depends on the one you fear most. The
- 4:33:09more successful version of yourself also
- 4:33:11has fear. It's just that your fear of
- 4:33:14regret is greater than your fear of
- 4:33:17rejection. Think about that for a
- 4:33:18second. I'm going to say it one more
- 4:33:19time. Your fear of regret must
- 4:33:22supersede, must be bigger, must be
- 4:33:24greater than your fear of rejection. And
- 4:33:27so I remember when I when I when I quit
- 4:33:28my management consulting job, which took
- 4:33:30me six months, so I'm not saying this
- 4:33:31from a pedestal. It took me 6 months of
- 4:33:33I decided I wanted to quit. It took me 6
- 4:33:35months before I actually quit. By the
- 4:33:37way, you can measure how powerful
- 4:33:38someone is by the distance between when
- 4:33:40they make a decision and when it happens
- 4:33:42in reality. So if you want to feel
- 4:33:44impotent, then take as long as you
- 4:33:46possibly can between when you make a
- 4:33:47decision and when you act on that
- 4:33:48decision. Now, for me, it was 6 months.
- 4:33:50And all I did was I called my friends up
- 4:33:52every night. I was like, I'm going to
- 4:33:53quit my job. I'm going to start a
- 4:33:54business. And I, you know, we talk every
- 4:33:55night, literally every night. And I
- 4:33:56would be pacing in my condo like, I'm
- 4:33:58going to do it. I'm going to do it. And
- 4:33:59I wouldn't do it. I was too afraid. I
- 4:34:01was too much of a scaredy-cat. But the
- 4:34:02thing that got me over the hump was
- 4:34:04this. Number one, I knew that when I
- 4:34:07looked back on my life, if I never took
- 4:34:10the jump, I would have been ashamed of
- 4:34:12myself. And I would have felt like I was
- 4:34:14a pansy. And I was like, I can't die a
- 4:34:15pansy. I have to be able to make a jump.
- 4:34:18Number two, I played out plan B, which
- 4:34:20is, okay, let's say I actually
- 4:34:22completely fail. What happens? I was
- 4:34:23like, well, I'm not really going to be
- 4:34:26homeless. I know enough people that I
- 4:34:27can get food, right? I was like, okay,
- 4:34:30so I would probably just couch surf. I'd
- 4:34:31have a little bit of shame, but at the
- 4:34:32end of the day, what would I really do?
- 4:34:34Well, I could always apply to get the
- 4:34:35job that I had back or I could just go
- 4:34:37to another place with an experience or a
- 4:34:40story that would set me up for something
- 4:34:42cooler later. And so all of a sudden I
- 4:34:44was like, "Wait, so my plan B is that I
- 4:34:45just have a cool experience that I could
- 4:34:47talk about at a job interview or to go
- 4:34:48to business school." Okay, that's that
- 4:34:50doesn't actually sound that bad. And so
- 4:34:52there's this huge amorphous fear, but
- 4:34:54I've just noticed in my life that fear
- 4:34:56only exists in the vague. It doesn't
- 4:34:58exist in the specific. If you're afraid
- 4:35:00of something, try and break it into
- 4:35:02pieces and spell it out. Play out the
- 4:35:03next two or three steps because all of a
- 4:35:05sudden, if you're in the developed
- 4:35:06Western world, the downside risk is not
- 4:35:10really real. Like the only real downside
- 4:35:13risk is the opinions of other people who
- 4:35:15will say that you failed who you don't
- 4:35:17care about anyways. But like you think
- 4:35:19you're going to die, but you're not.
- 4:35:21You're just going to learn some stuff
- 4:35:23and you'll be like, "Oh, maybe next time
- 4:35:24I'm not going to make that mistake." And
- 4:35:26that's it. And I say this and it's easy
- 4:35:27for me to say, but it took me 6 months
- 4:35:29to figure this out. But I do remember my
- 4:35:31final straw was the realization that I
- 4:35:33had at the time no girlfriend, no kids,
- 4:35:36and I had no real, you know, financial
- 4:35:38responsibilities besides like eating and
- 4:35:40having a place to live. I said, if I
- 4:35:43can't make the decision now because it
- 4:35:45feels too risky, I will never be able to
- 4:35:47make the decision because if other
- 4:35:49people rely on me, now some of you are
- 4:35:51in a position where people do rely on
- 4:35:52you and you're like, "Well, Alex, you
- 4:35:54know, I've got people who rely on me."
- 4:35:56Yeah, I would say that it makes it
- 4:35:58harder and what now? Harder and so what?
- 4:36:02But for me, that was the thing that got
- 4:36:03me over the hump was like, if I don't do
- 4:36:05it now, I'm never going to do it. I'm
- 4:36:07never going to have fewer
- 4:36:08responsibilities.
- 4:36:10And to to play this out a little bit
- 4:36:11more, if you have people who depend on
- 4:36:13you, their dependencies on you might
- 4:36:15increase. And so, if you can't do it
- 4:36:16now, you still might as well do it,
- 4:36:19right? Because it's only going to go one
- 4:36:20way. Number six, persistence
- 4:36:23creates timing.
- 4:36:27So you can time everything perfectly if
- 4:36:30your intention is to never stop. I'm
- 4:36:32going to say this one more time. You can
- 4:36:34time everything perfectly if your
- 4:36:36intention is to never stop. So think
- 4:36:38about this visually. So let's imagine
- 4:36:40that this line right here is is the is
- 4:36:42your lifeline. It's life as time passes.
- 4:36:45Right? Now
- 4:36:47let's say that you have some special
- 4:36:48thing that's going to happen here and
- 4:36:50some special opportunity that happens
- 4:36:51here and some special opportunity that
- 4:36:53happens here. What most people try and
- 4:36:55do is they don't want to take they don't
- 4:36:56want to work at all and then they're
- 4:36:58like, "Oh, I'm just going to work here
- 4:36:59and then I'm going to work here and then
- 4:37:01I'm going to work here." But the
- 4:37:03likelihood that you're there in these
- 4:37:04three moments is very low if you're
- 4:37:06trying to time it. But if you work the
- 4:37:08whole time, then the timing will always
- 4:37:11be perfect because you will be ready.
- 4:37:13And so perfect timing is a complete
- 4:37:14myth, but perfect preparation isn't. And
- 4:37:17that on a long enough time horizon, your
- 4:37:18opportunity will come. People think that
- 4:37:20they need perfect conditions to start
- 4:37:22when in reality starting is the perfect
- 4:37:24condition. It creates the perfect
- 4:37:25condition for opportunity to be
- 4:37:27capitalized on. And I can tell you this
- 4:37:29from firsthand experience with me like
- 4:37:30the more you do, the more you see you
- 4:37:33can do. And so opportunities multiply
- 4:37:37with skill. And so the better you get at
- 4:37:40doing stuff, the more things you know
- 4:37:41you would be able to do and win at. And
- 4:37:44so the goal is to gain as many skills as
- 4:37:46possible so that you have access to the
- 4:37:48maximum number of potential
- 4:37:50opportunities. A lot of people were
- 4:37:51thinking that, oh, I'm going to wait for
- 4:37:52the right moment. But when you have
- 4:37:54unlimited skills, like Elon can go do
- 4:37:56whatever he wants. He could build a city
- 4:37:58in the middle of the ocean. And so he
- 4:38:00could do that. He has the skills because
- 4:38:03the world of opportunities open to him.
- 4:38:05He also spent all of his younger years
- 4:38:07just developing all these different
- 4:38:08skills, becoming a polymath across all
- 4:38:10these different things, independent,
- 4:38:11political stuff. Put it away. The point
- 4:38:12is the guy is good. All right. And so
- 4:38:14the goal is to get good and then you
- 4:38:16will never have a shortage of
- 4:38:17opportunities. Number seven, envy
- 4:38:22versus effort. All right. Let me break
- 4:38:24this down. If people worked for their
- 4:38:27goals as hard as they envy others for
- 4:38:30achieving them, they would already have
- 4:38:31achieved them themselves. So think about
- 4:38:34the amount of mental effort that goes
- 4:38:35into the hate that people spew out, the
- 4:38:37envy for wanting other people's stuff.
- 4:38:39I'll give you a couple hard truths about
- 4:38:41this. Number one, no one is doing as
- 4:38:43well as you think they are. So, by
- 4:38:45comparison, you're actually better off
- 4:38:46than you think. Number two, you don't
- 4:38:48win by beating people. You win by
- 4:38:51growing into your potential and then
- 4:38:52allowing them to shrink into irrelevance
- 4:38:54by consequence. Three, and guess what?
- 4:38:58Your biggest threat is not your
- 4:39:00competition. It's a mediocre version of
- 4:39:03you that never realized what you could
- 4:39:05become. And as pathy as that may sound,
- 4:39:08it's also true, right? A lot of people
- 4:39:10think it's like ah, you know, that guy's
- 4:39:12doing really well. It's like his doing
- 4:39:13well changes nothing about your reality.
- 4:39:17Something really ironic that I noticed
- 4:39:18is that the people who get copied the
- 4:39:21most by their competition are the people
- 4:39:23who ignore the competition who are
- 4:39:24copying them. Fundamentally, you start
- 4:39:27by focusing on the customer and if you
- 4:39:29always put the customer first, everyone
- 4:39:31will copy you because you're actually
- 4:39:32doing the thing that will work, which is
- 4:39:34focusing on the customer. And there's a
- 4:39:35lot of weird things in life like that
- 4:39:36where like it's the opposite is what you
- 4:39:38what you'd think like oh I'm going to
- 4:39:40look at what everyone else is. It's like
- 4:39:41no just do what matters most and then
- 4:39:43people who don't know how to think will
- 4:39:45just copy you. Real threat is that no
- 4:39:47one copies you at all because you're
- 4:39:48doing nothing. If you take all this
- 4:39:50effort that you look that you put into
- 4:39:52comparing yourself to other people that
- 4:39:53you look to kind of like tearing them
- 4:39:55down sometimes even in your mind. Let's
- 4:39:56be real. Maybe you don't say it to other
- 4:39:57people, but in your mind you're like me
- 4:40:00that whatever that is, whatever that
- 4:40:01feeling is that just do that towards you
- 4:40:05not being good enough. What happens is
- 4:40:07that when you do that, all of that
- 4:40:08effort, all that energy goes into
- 4:40:10improving yourself rather than tearing
- 4:40:11down somebody else. And only one of
- 4:40:13those things will help you. Number
- 4:40:14eight, hard conversations create
- 4:40:16opportunities. Hard truth, everything
- 4:40:19you want is on the other side of a few
- 4:40:21hard conversations that you have been
- 4:40:22putting off. People either grow into
- 4:40:24their potential or they keep living the
- 4:40:26same six months of their life over and
- 4:40:27over again. And the difference is how
- 4:40:29many hard conversations you're willing
- 4:40:31to have and how fast you have them once
- 4:40:33you realize you need to. If you sherk
- 4:40:35away from this, and I get it. I'm
- 4:40:36somebody who like it for a very long
- 4:40:38time had a hard time having hard
- 4:40:39conversations, right? Like I literally
- 4:40:40traveled across the country before I
- 4:40:42told my dad that I left. All right? Like
- 4:40:43I get it. So if you think having
- 4:40:46uncomfortable conversations is hard,
- 4:40:48just wait until you see the result of
- 4:40:50not having them. It will be harder.
- 4:40:52Basically, the the struggle is that you
- 4:40:54have short-term pain versus long-term
- 4:40:56pain. And long-term pain, I call regret.
- 4:40:59Comfort is short gain. Regret is long
- 4:41:03pain. Fear is short pain. Fulfillment is
- 4:41:08long gain. You want to trade short pains
- 4:41:11for long gains, not short gains for long
- 4:41:14pains. It's not the safe bet. It's a
- 4:41:17guaranteed loss just later. All right.
- 4:41:20So, I'm going to I'm going to spell this
- 4:41:21out. This is short pain.
- 4:41:26This is long pain.
- 4:41:30This is short
- 4:41:33gain.
- 4:41:34This is long
- 4:41:36gain.
- 4:41:39You want to trade short pain for long
- 4:41:43gain.
- 4:41:45That's the goal. It's the best trade.
- 4:41:48Number nine, endure. There's a reason
- 4:41:51that when I gave instructions to some of
- 4:41:53the new business owners who were going
- 4:41:54to start, you know, putting a community
- 4:41:56on school, one of the sole instructions
- 4:41:58I gave them was learn to endure. And so,
- 4:42:01the fastest way to become the person you
- 4:42:02want to be is to put yourself in a
- 4:42:04situation where you have no choice but
- 4:42:05to become them. You'd be amazed at what
- 4:42:07you can endure when you have no choice.
- 4:42:09For me, when I signed my lease for my
- 4:42:12gym, I had $5,000 in my bank account.
- 4:42:15The rent was $5,000. I had never really
- 4:42:18made money before. And so I was like,
- 4:42:20"Oh, wow. How does this work? If I made
- 4:42:23100% of the money that I had made in my
- 4:42:25job, I would have been able to pay rent
- 4:42:27and have no food or anything else." But
- 4:42:29one of my favorite flavor texts on Magic
- 4:42:31cards is necessity is the mother of
- 4:42:33invention, right? It's the constraints
- 4:42:35that create the innovation that is
- 4:42:38required to get you out of the
- 4:42:40constraint, to get you out of the hard
- 4:42:41time. And so when I think back on like
- 4:42:43human history, sometimes we think that
- 4:42:45things that were going through our
- 4:42:46heart, but they're certainly much easier
- 4:42:47than the things that other humans have
- 4:42:49endured. And how did they endure them?
- 4:42:51Well, when the only choice they had was
- 4:42:53die or endure, you tend to endure.
- 4:42:55Number 10, results. Excuses. This is not
- 4:42:57going to be a big surprise here. The
- 4:42:59thing with excuses that's interesting is
- 4:43:01that they may be valid. And I think
- 4:43:03that's the part that people struggle
- 4:43:04with is that they're like, "Yeah,
- 4:43:07obviously results matter more excuses,
- 4:43:09but insert special snowflake." The thing
- 4:43:12is is that like you might be right. And
- 4:43:15I just like this quote from Ila. She
- 4:43:17says, "It's not your fault, but it is
- 4:43:19still your problem. You still have to do
- 4:43:21something about it. Or you can just wait
- 4:43:23and say, you know what? I'm going to
- 4:43:25continue to not live the life that I
- 4:43:27want until I die." And everyone will be
- 4:43:29like, "Oh yeah, he had an excuse. That's
- 4:43:33why."
- 4:43:35Right? Is that what like is that what
- 4:43:37you really want? is that people were
- 4:43:39like, "Yeah, he had an excuse."
- 4:43:43Like that's it. Like you like like it's
- 4:43:45a weird thing to want a permission slip
- 4:43:48for mediocrity, which is fundamentally
- 4:43:51what excuses are. You just want
- 4:43:53permission from everyone else to still
- 4:43:54get respect without the outcome
- 4:43:58because of your extenduating
- 4:44:00circumstances. And the thing is is
- 4:44:02there's a ton of lure, but the only
- 4:44:04person who actually believes that is
- 4:44:05you. People might not along. People who
- 4:44:07love you might say, "Yeah, you know
- 4:44:09what? You are special. You are a special
- 4:44:10snowflake. Your mama might still love
- 4:44:11you." But like, you're not going to earn
- 4:44:13anyone's respect. And I think you
- 4:44:16certainly won't earn the respect of the
- 4:44:17person that matters most, which is you
- 4:44:20cuz you'll always know that you could
- 4:44:21have done more, that you could have done
- 4:44:22better. That's the one that keeps me up.
- 4:44:25I have a saying that I tell myself a lot
- 4:44:27when I'm doing something that I don't
- 4:44:28want to do, and it's I will do what is
- 4:44:31required. It's not about doing your
- 4:44:33best. It's about doing what's required
- 4:44:34because what's required might be better
- 4:44:36than your best is right now. But the
- 4:44:37good news is that your best can get
- 4:44:38better. So number 11, and this is this
- 4:44:41one's real. All right. The hard way is
- 4:44:44the easy way. You're like, "How does
- 4:44:46that work?" The hard way is the easy way
- 4:44:49because the easy way
- 4:44:52never gets you there. So think about it.
- 4:44:54People always are looking for the
- 4:44:56shortcut, but you have to accept a very
- 4:44:58simple truth, which is that the shortcut
- 4:45:00never actually takes you to the place
- 4:45:01that you're trying to go. And it's
- 4:45:03because it's rarely one big thing. And I
- 4:45:06would postulate, fancy word, right? That
- 4:45:10there are a lot of shortcuts that exist
- 4:45:11in life. Wait for it. Wait for it. And
- 4:45:14everyone already uses those. And so
- 4:45:15whenever an actual shortcut gets found,
- 4:45:18all humans immediately do it and it no
- 4:45:20longer becomes a shortcut. It's just a
- 4:45:22thing that everyone does and it's not
- 4:45:23really a thing anymore. Like we learned
- 4:45:25how to tie knots. That was a big
- 4:45:26breakthrough. And then everyone ties
- 4:45:27their shoes and they're like, "Oh my
- 4:45:28god, let me show you the shortcut to
- 4:45:30this." It's like, "Oh, you tie." Like,
- 4:45:31"Oh my god, everyone does it." and it's
- 4:45:32like not a thing anymore, right? And so
- 4:45:34all the things that you want to have
- 4:45:36that most people don't have don't have
- 4:45:37shortcuts. But thing is is so many
- 4:45:39people waste so much time. They
- 4:45:40literally waste longer than it would
- 4:45:42have taken the hard way or the only way
- 4:45:45to get there in search of the easy way
- 4:45:47that doesn't exist. And so the reality
- 4:45:50of this is that it's usually a hundred
- 4:45:52[snorts] small things that make days,
- 4:45:54weeks, and months hard. It's the
- 4:45:56neverending onslaught of [ __ ] And then
- 4:45:58you remember after going through that
- 4:46:00onslaught of [ __ ] that you signed up for
- 4:46:02this, but then again, you figured that
- 4:46:04it would be hard. And then you're
- 4:46:06reminded that this is what hard feels
- 4:46:08like. And so you keep going because it's
- 4:46:10the only choice you have. I want to
- 4:46:12remind you that a lot of times what we
- 4:46:14imagine hard to be is different than how
- 4:46:17we experience hard because the nature of
- 4:46:19hard changes, too. And it's more of a
- 4:46:22limitation in how we describe hardship
- 4:46:24than it is. And I actually think there's
- 4:46:26a big problem with this. So, just kind
- 4:46:27of like Eskimos have like seven
- 4:46:29different words for snow. I feel like I
- 4:46:31should have like 25 different words for
- 4:46:33hard, right? [laughter] Like the amount
- 4:46:35of things that you go through. There's
- 4:46:37like lifestyle hard like, okay, so
- 4:46:39there's sacrifice hard of like you're
- 4:46:40giving up things that you enjoy. There's
- 4:46:42also like effort hard of like starting
- 4:46:44to do things that you hate doing that
- 4:46:45you're not good at. There's risk hard of
- 4:46:47the the fact that you could lose
- 4:46:49something that you currently have,
- 4:46:50right? That you have the chance of
- 4:46:52losing what you currently have. You have
- 4:46:53the uncertainty heart of the fact that
- 4:46:55you might be doing all of the sacrifice
- 4:46:57for nothing. There's lots of different
- 4:46:59flavors of heart and each one of them
- 4:47:00presents at different times and for some
- 4:47:02reason when it gets a new kind of heart,
- 4:47:04it's a new seventh type of snowflake
- 4:47:06heart, then you're like, "Oh, this is
- 4:47:08different." But it's not. It's just that
- 4:47:10the thing that you grow comfortable
- 4:47:12with, then you conquer and then you're
- 4:47:15exposed to a new level. And so, I love
- 4:47:17this quote from Paul Graham. He said,
- 4:47:19"If you want to make a million dollars,
- 4:47:21you have to endure a million dollars
- 4:47:22worth of pain." Fundamentally, in my
- 4:47:24opinion, the people who who who end up
- 4:47:26building building, not inheriting,
- 4:47:28building tremendous wealth just have
- 4:47:31massive concentrations of pain. So,
- 4:47:33don't go looking for the easy way
- 4:47:34because it will never get you there.
- 4:47:36Number 12, don't, this is a big one,
- 4:47:39don't give away your power. Now, this
- 4:47:42sounds very like, you know, girl power
- 4:47:43or a little uh little like rahrh, but I
- 4:47:46will I will break this down in a little
- 4:47:47bit less rahrh way. So, what offends you
- 4:47:51controls you. Whatever you point your
- 4:47:54finger of blame towards is what also you
- 4:47:56point your power towards. Meaning, we
- 4:47:58talked about excuses earlier. I can't do
- 4:48:01it because insert X. Insert X is the
- 4:48:04thing that has power over your life. And
- 4:48:05I remember when I realized this was that
- 4:48:07I had this belief that I would never be
- 4:48:09able to be in a long-term committed
- 4:48:11relationship because my mother had hurt
- 4:48:13me as a child. I didn't get enough hugs.
- 4:48:15Who gives a [ __ ] Whatever. But I
- 4:48:17realized that by using that excuse and
- 4:48:21by saying it's her fault I'm broken.
- 4:48:24It's her fault I can't trust people.
- 4:48:26It's her fault I can't love anybody. By
- 4:48:28by saying that over and over again, all
- 4:48:30I did was I said, "My mother controls
- 4:48:34how my love life will go." Oo, heavy
- 4:48:39real. Well, I don't want her to have
- 4:48:41control over how I choose to love or not
- 4:48:44love or how how content I get in a
- 4:48:46relationship or anything like that. So,
- 4:48:48I actively had to say, "Maybe all these
- 4:48:50things happened. Maybe they didn't.
- 4:48:52Also, who cares? Me. I care. I'm the one
- 4:48:55who's affected by this." And what's
- 4:48:56crazy about this, it's kind of a weird
- 4:48:57thing with like parents is that you
- 4:49:00think by hurting yourself, you get back
- 4:49:03at them for hurting you. And you do hurt
- 4:49:05them when you hurt yourself, but you
- 4:49:07hurt you more at some point. And this is
- 4:49:10like this is like super real.
- 4:49:13Let's say that you were parented tough,
- 4:49:15whatever that means for you. You had
- 4:49:17lots of bad things happen, okay? And it
- 4:49:19was probably because you were a child
- 4:49:20trying to deal with the world without
- 4:49:21the skills of dealing with the world as
- 4:49:22an adult. But you have these things
- 4:49:25happen, right? And on some level, you
- 4:49:28might believe that you becoming
- 4:49:30successful, you making it work,
- 4:49:32validates the way that you were
- 4:49:34parented. And so you have this conflict
- 4:49:37where you're like, well, I don't want
- 4:49:38them to think that they did a good job
- 4:49:40by me being successful.
- 4:49:42And so then you want to keep not being
- 4:49:45successful to prove to them and to hurt
- 4:49:47them for hurting you.
- 4:49:52and you stay there as long as you want
- 4:49:54them to control you.
- 4:49:57And so the day that you choose to
- 4:49:59control yourself is the day that you
- 4:50:01choose to divorce your results from the
- 4:50:05very viable reasons that you have to not
- 4:50:08win.
- 4:50:10You are right. And so what? Number 13,
- 4:50:13rejection versus regret. At some point,
- 4:50:18everyone needs to choose whether they'd
- 4:50:19rather risk rejection now or guarantee
- 4:50:21regret later. And so, losers fear
- 4:50:23rejection, winners fear regret. And most
- 4:50:26attempts fail of anything. Failure is
- 4:50:29literally a prerequisite for success.
- 4:50:31And one of the one of my favorite quotes
- 4:50:33of mine is greatness rejects all
- 4:50:37first-time applicants. And so, it's kind
- 4:50:39of like that person that just is like,
- 4:50:41"Oh, I can't get a job." And you're
- 4:50:43like, "What have you done?" They're
- 4:50:43like, "Well, I applied somewhere." And
- 4:50:45you're like, "What do you mean?" They're
- 4:50:46like, "I applied somewhere." And you're
- 4:50:48like, "And?" And and they're like,
- 4:50:50"Yeah." And I and I didn't I didn't get
- 4:50:52the job. They didn't even call me. And
- 4:50:53you're like, "You went to one place?"
- 4:50:55And you're like, and they're like,
- 4:50:56"Yeah." This is going to be a really
- 4:50:57good analogy for somebody who's
- 4:50:59listening to this only for people who
- 4:51:00don't have a business yet. A lot of
- 4:51:02starting a business is the number of
- 4:51:04reachouts that you had to do in order to
- 4:51:06get the path, the job, the career that
- 4:51:08you want right now. So, think about the
- 4:51:11amount of interviews. Think about the
- 4:51:13amount of outreach. Think about the
- 4:51:14amount of job ads. Think about the
- 4:51:15amount of resumes that you sent out.
- 4:51:17Think about all of that. And all of that
- 4:51:19work got you what I would consider one
- 4:51:21sale. You got one person to say yes to
- 4:51:23you and they would give you money for
- 4:51:24work. All right? Now, obviously within
- 4:51:26the context of an employee relationship,
- 4:51:27but fundamentally actually works the
- 4:51:28same way. All you do in a business is
- 4:51:31the same thing. If you can handle that
- 4:51:33level of rejection, then you can handle
- 4:51:35the same level of rejection in a
- 4:51:36business. It's not actually that
- 4:51:38different. The question is whether you
- 4:51:39can handle that level of regret years
- 4:51:41later for not doing it. And I'll say
- 4:51:43this, one of the things that I've
- 4:51:44noticed between champions and everyone
- 4:51:45else is that people everyone else is so
- 4:51:48excited when they win. They're so
- 4:51:50excited, you know, by the idea of them
- 4:51:52getting first place. But there's a
- 4:51:53reason that they never get first place.
- 4:51:55It's because they're excited about it.
- 4:51:57The people who always and very
- 4:51:58consistently hit first place and win the
- 4:52:00championships are relieved because they
- 4:52:02tend to hate losing more than they love
- 4:52:04winning.
- 4:52:05and they expected to win because of the
- 4:52:07level of preparation they had compared
- 4:52:08to everyone else.
- 4:52:10Which brings me very magically to number
- 4:52:1314. Consistency beats talent. So listen
- 4:52:16to this. You can beat most people at
- 4:52:19anything if you just stick with it for a
- 4:52:21year. You can become competent at just
- 4:52:23about any skill in 20 hours. It's just
- 4:52:25that people will wait 10 years to get
- 4:52:27the first 20 hours logged, right? Like
- 4:52:29if you want to learn how to play the
- 4:52:30first few notes of a guitar, you can
- 4:52:32learn in about 20 hours. Now, are you
- 4:52:34gonna be Jimmyi Hendricks? Which Jenzie,
- 4:52:37who's a guitarist, Purple Haze, you can
- 4:52:38look it up. Anyways, the point is is
- 4:52:40that people have this huge delay before
- 4:52:42they begin. And what make things hard
- 4:52:45isn't complexity, it's consistency. And
- 4:52:49so, as boring as it is, you just have to
- 4:52:51keep doing it before you get anything
- 4:52:52back. So, one of my favorite quotes from
- 4:52:55myself is the world belongs to those who
- 4:52:58can keep doing without seeing the result
- 4:52:59of their doing. You have to delay how
- 4:53:02quick you get a reward, how fast you
- 4:53:05need a cookie in order to keep going.
- 4:53:06I've been told that I'm decent at
- 4:53:08presenting and talking on stage in front
- 4:53:10of people. And what a lot of people
- 4:53:14don't see is that for years I spoke with
- 4:53:18a microphone in front of a group of
- 4:53:19people and I did it like multiple times
- 4:53:22a day and I did that in the form of a
- 4:53:24fitness session. And so I had to
- 4:53:27literally stand on a box and shout
- 4:53:29around and tell people what they had to
- 4:53:30do. And I had to do that for years. And
- 4:53:34I remember when I had to get on stage
- 4:53:36for the first time and I had in high
- 4:53:40school been very nervous to public
- 4:53:41speak. And as I was about to get up on
- 4:53:44stage, I was like, why am I not nervous
- 4:53:46about this? Like this is weird. Like I
- 4:53:47should I was like, I should be nervous.
- 4:53:49Like why am I not nervous? And I was
- 4:53:50like, I've I've done this so many times.
- 4:53:53Like so many times. And I'm not talking
- 4:53:56about, you know, Civil War history and
- 4:53:59Abraham Lincoln. I'm talking about stuff
- 4:54:02I know. Outwork your self-doubt through
- 4:54:05repetition, not affirmations.
- 4:54:09You don't do it through belief. You do
- 4:54:11it through stimuli habituation, which is
- 4:54:14just fancy words for saying you expose
- 4:54:16yourself to the bad things so many times
- 4:54:18they get used to and it's no longer a
- 4:54:20bad thing anymore. It's just life. If
- 4:54:22you want to get over a fear, the way
- 4:54:23they do it is habituation. So, if I
- 4:54:25wanted to get over, you know, being
- 4:54:26afraid of spiders. I'm not afraid of
- 4:54:27spiders, but some people are afraid of
- 4:54:28spiders, right? If you want to get over
- 4:54:30that fear, you literally lock yourself
- 4:54:31in a room with a bunch of spiders and
- 4:54:34all you do is you just have panic attack
- 4:54:36after a panic attack and you pass out
- 4:54:37and you wake up again. The tires are
- 4:54:38there. You pass out. You keep doing
- 4:54:40eventually eventually your nervous
- 4:54:41system adjusts and 5 hours later, 8
- 4:54:44hours later, you walk out of the room
- 4:54:47unafraid because you have habituated.
- 4:54:50And so, the point of practice for all of
- 4:54:52these things is to habituate. as fast as
- 4:54:54you can. And so we're trying to
- 4:54:56microwave that period of time. And the
- 4:54:57thing is, let's say it takes let's say
- 4:54:58it takes this many reps. You can have
- 4:55:00this many reps take you a year or you
- 4:55:02can have it take you a month, depending
- 4:55:03on how dedicated you are to it. Number
- 4:55:0515, have no shame. All right. Now, I
- 4:55:10have told this before, but my plan B was
- 4:55:14that I would drive Uber and strip. Now,
- 4:55:16I think part of that was because I
- 4:55:17wanted to, you know, thumb my whatever
- 4:55:19the the Shakespearean saying, I bite my
- 4:55:20thumb at you. uh to bite my thumb at my
- 4:55:22my very respectable parents uh and say
- 4:55:25like I would take off my clothes for
- 4:55:26money. Now, of course, they would be
- 4:55:27horrified by that, but I think part of
- 4:55:29the reason I was okay with it was I was
- 4:55:30like, I'm gonna I'm going to do it my
- 4:55:32way. I want to be crystal clear here. If
- 4:55:34you have no money and you want to make
- 4:55:36money, you should have no shame. Knock,
- 4:55:40call, email, text, DM, ask.
- 4:55:42Life-changing doors do not open
- 4:55:44themselves. And sometimes I feel like
- 4:55:46shame was invented by people who have to
- 4:55:48prevent people who have not from taking
- 4:55:50action because all of this is just an
- 4:55:53illusion. What are you ashamed of?
- 4:55:56Trying. Like let's play it out. Remember
- 4:55:58I said fear only happens in the abstract
- 4:56:00not in the specific. So if you reach out
- 4:56:03to a stranger no matter what happens you
- 4:56:06always come out better than before
- 4:56:08because you either have a sale or you
- 4:56:10have an experience.
- 4:56:12Both make you better. And so the crazy
- 4:56:15thing about trying is that it has an
- 4:56:17asymmetric riskreward return. So worst
- 4:56:19case is you get a no and you learn from
- 4:56:21it. You get better. Life gives you
- 4:56:22unlimited shots while you're alive. And
- 4:56:25so if you have nothing, like you you're
- 4:56:26just basically cashing in lottery
- 4:56:28tickets and saying, "Oh my god, I lost.
- 4:56:29But what you're paying with is time."
- 4:56:30Fine. Pay more time. Get more tickets.
- 4:56:32Keep scratching. So do you know the
- 4:56:34difference between shame and guilt?
- 4:56:36Guilt is when you break your own rules.
- 4:56:40Shame is when you break other people's
- 4:56:42rules.
- 4:56:44So if you are gay and you're in a
- 4:56:49religious community, you would probably
- 4:56:51feel shame. If you also share that
- 4:56:54religious community's rule set, you
- 4:56:56would also feel guilt. If, let's say,
- 4:56:58you were in a very liberal progressive
- 4:57:01environment, you might feel neither
- 4:57:03shame nor guilt. And so the question is,
- 4:57:06whose rules are you following? If you
- 4:57:09have this feeling, this fear of being
- 4:57:12ashamed, then the question is, who's the
- 4:57:14one who wrote the rules that you're
- 4:57:16choosing to follow,
- 4:57:18and I can promise you it's not the
- 4:57:20people who are successful because
- 4:57:22they're the ones shouting on the
- 4:57:23rooftops telling you that it's totally
- 4:57:25different once you get in the pool. It's
- 4:57:28very different. And it's kind of like
- 4:57:28you have the lights of the world turn on
- 4:57:30and like you're living in this mirage
- 4:57:32when you're not succeeding where there's
- 4:57:34all this all this uncertainty. There's
- 4:57:37all this ambiguity. There's this fog of
- 4:57:40the unknown in front of you. But as soon
- 4:57:43as you start taking action, things
- 4:57:44become very crystal clear. I think
- 4:57:46there's there's I'm sure some stoic
- 4:57:47analogy that said this, but basically
- 4:57:49like if you've ever walked through very
- 4:57:50dense fog, you can only see a couple
- 4:57:52steps in front of you. The only thing
- 4:57:54that you can do in fog is just start
- 4:57:57walking. And as you walk, more steps
- 4:58:00become available to you. And so there's
- 4:58:02this misconception that you're going to
- 4:58:04be able to see the entire path ahead of
- 4:58:06you. But it has two fundamental
- 4:58:08fallacies in front of it. Number one is
- 4:58:10that you have the right vision to be
- 4:58:12able to see that far with your current
- 4:58:14skill set and resources, which you don't
- 4:58:16because imagine today all of your
- 4:58:19conditions change. If you had more
- 4:58:20skills, which is hard to imagine cuz you
- 4:58:22can't imagine what it's like to have the
- 4:58:23skill, but maybe let's say you have
- 4:58:25resources that you didn't have before.
- 4:58:27Well, that would probably change the way
- 4:58:28you play the game. So, trying to play
- 4:58:30out and try and play 17 steps in advance
- 4:58:33when the game itself is going to change
- 4:58:35and you as a player are going to change.
- 4:58:37The only thing that you can boil all of
- 4:58:40this down to is to take the steps that
- 4:58:44you can see in front of you one at a
- 4:58:46time. And I would write this down of
- 4:58:48like what are the things that are
- 4:58:51stopping me? And more specifically,
- 4:58:53whose voice do I hear? Whose voice or
- 4:58:56judgment am I afraid of? Because usually
- 4:58:58it's people. It's society is what we
- 4:59:00say, but it's usually like two people.
- 4:59:03And I remember when I had this big
- 4:59:04decision that I had to make when I was
- 4:59:06considering selling gym lunch. I thought
- 4:59:08that $46 million was not a lot of money
- 4:59:11for the business. Now, some of you may
- 4:59:12hear this and be like, "Oh my god,
- 4:59:13that's amazing." But believe it or not,
- 4:59:14at before we before COVID happened, uh,
- 4:59:17Gym Launch was valed 150 million. And so
- 4:59:19for me, going from 150 to 50 or, you
- 4:59:21know, 46, it felt small, right? It felt
- 4:59:24like a really small number. And I
- 4:59:26remember there was a particular person,
- 4:59:28we'll call it a friend of me, if you
- 4:59:29will, that I thought would think that
- 4:59:31they were better than me if I sold for
- 4:59:35this small number.
- 4:59:37And when I was able to narrow it down to
- 4:59:39just that one person's voice, I thought
- 4:59:41to myself, am I going to give that
- 4:59:45person power over my entire life? Which
- 4:59:48is literally what it was. I was choosing
- 4:59:50not to make a decision because of
- 4:59:51someone else. That person has complete
- 4:59:53power over me. And I was like, well,
- 4:59:55that's a terrible reason not to do this.
- 4:59:58And the crazier part is that even if
- 5:00:02you're right and that person does say
- 5:00:05that you suck,
- 5:00:07so what? Most people don't want you to
- 5:00:10win. And even if you do win, they will
- 5:00:12try and do a reverse excuse, which is
- 5:00:14called a justification for why you
- 5:00:16should be excused of the respect that
- 5:00:17you should earn for having won. He just
- 5:00:20has good genetics. He has great parents.
- 5:00:23He uh, you know, inherited his wealth.
- 5:00:26He had connect good connections. She was
- 5:00:28born in America. He speaks English. He's
- 5:00:29a man. He's white. He's whatever you
- 5:00:31want.
- 5:00:36But giving the person justifications in
- 5:00:38no way helps you. You might be right.
- 5:00:40And so what? Like it's it's so funny.
- 5:00:42It's like let's say you have some
- 5:00:44advantage, whatever it is, right?
- 5:00:46Whatever whatever advantage you're born
- 5:00:47with, right? You might have one.
- 5:00:50It's kind of the thing same thing as the
- 5:00:51parent thing. It's like, well, I don't
- 5:00:53want to be successful because I don't
- 5:00:54want to prove that I had this advantage.
- 5:00:56It's like, would you prefer to prove
- 5:00:58everyone wrong by saying I had this
- 5:01:00advantage and I also wasted it? I
- 5:01:02remember I'll tell you a story and I
- 5:01:04think it'll probably that'll that'll
- 5:01:05round this off well. So, when I was
- 5:01:07younger, I didn't want to be a doctor,
- 5:01:08but that was pretty much the path that
- 5:01:09was laid out in front of me. And so, my
- 5:01:11father's a successful doctor and I I was
- 5:01:14like, it's it's it's cheating, you know,
- 5:01:16to to, you know, just assume your
- 5:01:18practice and just like immediately have
- 5:01:20a practice that makes a lot of money.
- 5:01:22and he said, "Do you think Shaq
- 5:01:26when he was 7 feet tall was like,"It
- 5:01:28wouldn't be fair for me to play
- 5:01:29basketball. Other people aren't as tall
- 5:01:31as me." And I always remember that. He's
- 5:01:34like, "You play the cards you're dealt.
- 5:01:35These are the cards you have. Play
- 5:01:37them." And I remember thinking that as
- 5:01:39now obviously I didn't decide to be a
- 5:01:41doctor, but the reason that I didn't
- 5:01:43want to do it was because I thought
- 5:01:44other people would say that I would they
- 5:01:46would disqualify away my success as not
- 5:01:49earned by me.
- 5:01:51when the reality is that they're all
- 5:01:53going to disqualify your sex no matter
- 5:01:54what because it makes them feel bad and
- 5:01:57so [ __ ] them. But if you have some
- 5:02:00cards, for the love of God, play them.
- 5:02:022026 is going to be an interesting year.
- 5:02:04Reports just came out that for Black
- 5:02:06Friday, 95% of purchases were financed.
- 5:02:0867% of them were from people who didn't
- 5:02:11plan on paying it off in the next 30
- 5:02:12days, which is a very negative indicator
- 5:02:15for consumer strength. And everything
- 5:02:17starts with consumers and then it
- 5:02:18bubbles up to B2B. And so if you're a
- 5:02:20business in general, this will affect
- 5:02:22you. And so there's good news and bad
- 5:02:24news. The bad news is businesses that do
- 5:02:27not change the way they behave when the
- 5:02:29environment changes get left behind.
- 5:02:32It's called adapt or die. On the other
- 5:02:35hand, the good news is that when all the
- 5:02:38other lagards and the slow to move
- 5:02:40businesses don't respond, those
- 5:02:41customers still exist. And so some of
- 5:02:43the best companies that you've heard of
- 5:02:45actually grew the most during economic
- 5:02:47downturns because it's a redistribution
- 5:02:50of customers and market share during
- 5:02:52these truncated periods of time. And so
- 5:02:54it's highly likely that in the next 18
- 5:02:56months, 12 months, 6 months even, there
- 5:02:59could be a softening of demand. And so
- 5:03:01if your business is set up so that you
- 5:03:03have more reliable lead genen from
- 5:03:04multiple sources and a team that's in
- 5:03:07place that can actually continue to run
- 5:03:08the business and potentially continue to
- 5:03:10increase your margins because of AI,
- 5:03:12because of automation, then your
- 5:03:14business can be one of the winners. So
- 5:03:16if that's not in place in your business
- 5:03:17and you'd like it to be, I'd love to
- 5:03:18invite you out to two days here in Vegas
- 5:03:20with my team to a scaling workshop where
- 5:03:22we walk you through the things that
- 5:03:23we're doing at acquisition.com and our
- 5:03:25portfolio companies to help them scale
- 5:03:26in 2026. So if that sounds at all
- 5:03:28interesting, click book call. love to
- 5:03:30have you out here. Before I had my $46
- 5:03:32million exit, I went completely broke
- 5:03:34twice. Starting from zero multiple times
- 5:03:37taught me what actually matters. And so,
- 5:03:39here's everything I learned. I hit $100
- 5:03:41million in net worth at age 31, but
- 5:03:44before that, I lost all my money twice.
- 5:03:46And the difference between me losing all
- 5:03:48my money the first two times and now are
- 5:03:51these rules. [music] So, this is no
- 5:03:53advice for making money and keeping it.
- 5:03:55Number one, passive income is a lie. If
- 5:03:58you think about how money is made, you
- 5:04:00make money during time because every
- 5:04:03minute we're alive, a minute passes,
- 5:04:04time passes, and we make money over that
- 5:04:07time period. Which means every single
- 5:04:09person on planet Earth has a dollars per
- 5:04:11hour that they make. And so it's not
- 5:04:13that passive income doesn't exist just
- 5:04:16as much as active income doesn't exist.
- 5:04:18It's a spectrum where it's how active is
- 5:04:22it or how passive is the activity that
- 5:04:25I'm doing relative to the time that I'm
- 5:04:27investing. And so I would eliminate
- 5:04:30active versus passive and simply say
- 5:04:32what is my return on time or how much do
- 5:04:34I make per hour. It's just that most
- 5:04:36people get really scared of that like no
- 5:04:38one should trade their hours for money.
- 5:04:40Everyone trades their hours for money.
- 5:04:42It's just that when they receive the
- 5:04:43money it's just not denoted in hours.
- 5:04:46And so I think there's two downstream
- 5:04:47impacts in terms of changing your
- 5:04:49behavior around this that I had to
- 5:04:50apply. Number one is that I was obsessed
- 5:04:53with trying to find quick, easy, low,
- 5:04:57you know, effort money things. And so I
- 5:04:59ended up spending tons of money on
- 5:05:01things that I was obsessed with, hoping
- 5:05:04would cost me no time to make. And I
- 5:05:07would put not nearly enough time to the
- 5:05:10things I was actively making money with
- 5:05:12and thinking, how could I just make my
- 5:05:14active income significantly higher. And
- 5:05:17I would get obsessed with the idea that
- 5:05:20everything I did actively had to be
- 5:05:23scalable or it wasn't worth it. Because
- 5:05:25if it's not scalable, then why why
- 5:05:28should I bother? I shouldn't trade my
- 5:05:29time for money. But if I looked at what
- 5:05:31I was making over the last year and
- 5:05:33divided it by the amount of money I made
- 5:05:35per hour, this activity was 15 times
- 5:05:38what I was averaging per hour. So I
- 5:05:40should absolutely do as many hours of
- 5:05:42that until all of my hours are that and
- 5:05:45then I should find something else I can
- 5:05:47trade my time for that's even higher.
- 5:05:49And so if you want a very humbling
- 5:05:50experience, look at how much you made
- 5:05:53last year and then divide it by 2,000.
- 5:05:56If you want to know how much you made
- 5:05:58just in a 40-hour work week. Now, if you
- 5:06:01want to look at how much you made per
- 5:06:02actual hour of being alive, you can
- 5:06:04divide it by around 8,000 or just take
- 5:06:07that number and divide it by four. And
- 5:06:09that's actually how much you make per
- 5:06:11hour. And so when you're looking at is
- 5:06:14this worth my time, if it's more than
- 5:06:16that number, it probably is. And so what
- 5:06:19I should have done and what changed for
- 5:06:20me was that I stopped trying to invest
- 5:06:23my money from my active into trying to
- 5:06:25find more passive things and tried to
- 5:06:28say how do I invest my money more into
- 5:06:30my active to multiply my active that I
- 5:06:33know is working. Number two, if you
- 5:06:34can't buy it twice, don't buy it once or
- 5:06:36even buy it three times or four times or
- 5:06:39five times over, don't buy it once. And
- 5:06:41the way that really shifted how I
- 5:06:43started spending money, or rather
- 5:06:45started saving money and not spending
- 5:06:47money, was when I started looking at how
- 5:06:50much time it took me to make the amount
- 5:06:52of money post tax to buy whatever I
- 5:06:55wanted. And I remember this clear as
- 5:06:57day. I was working at Smoothie King as a
- 5:06:59blender tender and I was making 675 an
- 5:07:02hour and I had just gotten a raise from
- 5:07:04625 an hour. Uh I'm dating myself.
- 5:07:07Anyways, and while I was there, the
- 5:07:10co-workers that I had and I would always
- 5:07:12go to lunch next door at Coy, which was
- 5:07:13like a sandwich shop, and it was like 13
- 5:07:16bucks for a sandwich, right? And a drink
- 5:07:19and chips and whatever, right? And so I
- 5:07:20remember looking at my check and my 675
- 5:07:22an hour after taxes and fees was like
- 5:07:25six bucks an hour. And I was like, man,
- 5:07:27I gave up two hours of my six-hour shift
- 5:07:31every shift to go buy lunch. And I was
- 5:07:34like, I'm literally giving a third of my
- 5:07:36earning away for lunch every single day.
- 5:07:39If I knew that I had to work the first
- 5:07:41two hours just to get the sandwich, I
- 5:07:43don't think I'd ever make that trade.
- 5:07:44And yet I was making it every day. And
- 5:07:46then I started thinking I'd go to the
- 5:07:47mall and be like, "Oh, do you want a new
- 5:07:49shirt?" And it was at the Gap and it was
- 5:07:5130 bucks. And I was like, "Okay, well
- 5:07:53shoot, that's a whole shift." And I was
- 5:07:54like, "Would I work a whole shift if
- 5:07:57someone just held up a shirt that I
- 5:07:58didn't need to do it?" And I was like,
- 5:08:01"I don't think I would." And so all of a
- 5:08:03sudden it started shifting how my buying
- 5:08:04happened because I I started feeling the
- 5:08:06pain associated with what it would take
- 5:08:09if I had to do that before getting the
- 5:08:12thing I was going to buy. And it it
- 5:08:14completely changed my buying behavior.
- 5:08:16And to be very clear, saving money won't
- 5:08:19make you money, but saving money allows
- 5:08:22you to have money. And having money
- 5:08:24allows you to look further out. And when
- 5:08:26you look further out, you can take on
- 5:08:28bigger risks, which absolutely will make
- 5:08:30you more money. And when you're looking
- 5:08:31at the price of whatever the thing
- 5:08:32you're trying to buy is, obviously when
- 5:08:34I was a teenager looking at a shirt, I
- 5:08:36was looking at, okay, I'm making six
- 5:08:38bucks an hour. A shirt's 30 bucks. But
- 5:08:40when you're an adult and you're making
- 5:08:41$100 an hour and you're looking at a
- 5:08:43$500 or $1,000 purchase, would you work
- 5:08:46two days in order to do that? I don't
- 5:08:49know. Would I? Probably not. And
- 5:08:51sometimes you think, hey, is uh would I
- 5:08:53work all day for two days to go out with
- 5:08:56the boys for three hours on Saturday? I
- 5:08:59I'd probably be like, "Guys, I'm not
- 5:09:01going to work for two days just to go
- 5:09:02have three hours of fun, right? That
- 5:09:04feel like I'd rather just not work the
- 5:09:06two days." And that was the thing is
- 5:09:08whenever I had the well, I'd rather just
- 5:09:09not work than do that thing, then I was
- 5:09:13like, I shouldn't buy that thing. For
- 5:09:14example, when I was poor, I only spent
- 5:09:16cash. And so, my easiest way of actually
- 5:09:19creating a budget was that I had a
- 5:09:20personal training client who paid me
- 5:09:21$2,000 a month in cash. And so 100% of
- 5:09:24my money that came in through the
- 5:09:25business and credit cards and everything
- 5:09:27else is just what went into my bank
- 5:09:29account. And the only thing I knew I
- 5:09:30could live on was was inside of my
- 5:09:32wallet. And so as that got replenished
- 5:09:34and the thing is is that I'm so scared
- 5:09:35with money or I was so frugal with money
- 5:09:38that I would always make sure that I had
- 5:09:40more than that to make it for the next
- 5:09:42payment because sometimes the guy would
- 5:09:43take a day or two. You pay on Wednesday
- 5:09:44rather than a Monday or whatever. And I
- 5:09:46need to make sure that I have food for
- 5:09:47Chipotle. Three, most people
- 5:09:49overestimate what they can accomplish in
- 5:09:50a year and they underestimate what they
- 5:09:52can accomplish in a decade. And every
- 5:09:54new employee that I have that walks into
- 5:09:57acquisition.com, the number one thing
- 5:09:59that they say they want is growth. And I
- 5:10:01have this talk with them, which is the
- 5:10:0210-year million-dollar contract. But
- 5:10:04it's less about the million dollars and
- 5:10:06more about take whatever your net worth
- 5:10:08is now and add a zero to it or add two
- 5:10:11zeros to it. You can accomplish that in
- 5:10:13a decade. If you look at the biggest
- 5:10:15companies in the entire world who were
- 5:10:17worth multiple billions from their
- 5:10:19inception until the time they were worth
- 5:10:20multiple billions, many times it's under
- 5:10:2210 years, but it's still more than five,
- 5:10:25more than seven. And so you can
- 5:10:27accomplish life-changing crazy amounts
- 5:10:30of wealth in a decade. And so if you
- 5:10:33could write a contract to yourself and
- 5:10:35say, "I will make no money for 10 years,
- 5:10:38but on the 10th year, I will add a zero
- 5:10:40or two zeros or three zeros to my net
- 5:10:43worth. Would you do it?" And if the
- 5:10:46answer is yes, which it almost
- 5:10:47invariably is with every person who
- 5:10:48comes into my business, then I say,
- 5:10:50"Great. Now act like it." And so if you
- 5:10:53knew that you would make this amount of
- 5:10:55money over that period of time, you
- 5:10:56would stop this obsession, myself
- 5:10:57included, this is me giving my advice to
- 5:10:59my myself who lost it twice. When I was
- 5:11:02able to shift to, okay, what would I
- 5:11:05have to do that would make it
- 5:11:06unreasonable that I don't 10x in 10
- 5:11:09years, then all of a sudden I started
- 5:11:11making very reasonable bets that I knew
- 5:11:13would compound unto itself over that
- 5:11:16period of time. And then winning became
- 5:11:18inevitable rather than a game of chance.
- 5:11:21And so oftentimes you have potential
- 5:11:24earning and then actualized earning. And
- 5:11:26usually as you're realizing the
- 5:11:29potential earning you have, you're
- 5:11:30usually losing out on your investing
- 5:11:33into that potential, right? You're
- 5:11:34realizing the potential. And that's kind
- 5:11:36of like the kid that learns one skill
- 5:11:38and then immediately says, "I'm going to
- 5:11:39start a business opportunity around this
- 5:11:41one skill that makes me $5,000 a month."
- 5:11:43or they have this one skill and say,
- 5:11:45"Hey, this this company is willing to
- 5:11:47pay me $100,000 a year to go do this
- 5:11:50skill where I have this other company
- 5:11:51that'll give me a free internship where
- 5:11:53I could 10x my potential earning in
- 5:11:56three years, but I'm going to make
- 5:11:58$35,000 a year for the three years.
- 5:12:02Which one would you take?" The problem
- 5:12:03is most people will take the $100,000
- 5:12:06now and forego the investment in self.
- 5:12:09And that's the thing is we are the asset
- 5:12:10that we invest in. And the currency we
- 5:12:13invest into ourselves in is time,
- 5:12:15experience, and skills, right? Skill is
- 5:12:18the outcome. The time and the effort is
- 5:12:19what we put into it to gain the
- 5:12:21experiences which ultimately give us the
- 5:12:22skills. But if you're in an environment
- 5:12:24where you're not compounding your
- 5:12:26potential earning, then you're actually
- 5:12:28losing out long-term. You're ripping up
- 5:12:30your million dollar or your 10x or 100x
- 5:12:34contract for a decade from now so you
- 5:12:35can get the short fast money today. And
- 5:12:37that's why in the early days when you
- 5:12:39have limited amounts of money but lots
- 5:12:40of time and energy, instead of putting
- 5:12:42your money in the S&P 500, I like to say
- 5:12:45put in the SME 500 because the asset
- 5:12:49that is you will always beat the stock
- 5:12:51market. Number four, you should only
- 5:12:53have to get rich once. In other words,
- 5:12:56don't bet what you have and need for
- 5:12:58something you don't have and don't need.
- 5:13:00And some of the gravest mistakes I made
- 5:13:02manifested in, for example, me getting
- 5:13:05into a partnership that I shouldn't have
- 5:13:07gotten into because I wanted even more
- 5:13:09faster. Now, when you get into a
- 5:13:11partnership, which is usually the time
- 5:13:13where you put the most risk on the
- 5:13:14table, one is you guarantee the largest
- 5:13:17decrease in your earning power. You pay
- 5:13:19with the most expensive thing you have,
- 5:13:21which is equity, to somebody else. And
- 5:13:23so people get obsessive about what
- 5:13:25they're they're, you know, 5% 10% later
- 5:13:27when we're making money, but day one
- 5:13:30they're like, "All right, we cut the pie
- 5:13:31in half. Oh, we cut the pie into
- 5:13:33thirds." Right up front before
- 5:13:34anything's really happened. If you work
- 5:13:36with a partner or decide to partner up
- 5:13:38with somebody, one of your friends, one
- 5:13:39of your co-workers, this is coming from
- 5:13:40somebody who has nine failed
- 5:13:42partnerships before I met Leila and then
- 5:13:45that has now worked and now I have
- 5:13:46successful partnerships. A partner needs
- 5:13:49to have one of these three things that
- 5:13:51you do not have. They either have to
- 5:13:52have money that you don't have. And then
- 5:13:54the clear contribution is that money,
- 5:13:56they need to have experience you don't
- 5:13:58have. And the clear contribution is that
- 5:14:00experience. Or number three, they have
- 5:14:02time and energy that you don't have and
- 5:14:04the clear contribution is that time and
- 5:14:06energy. And so I added that second part
- 5:14:08on is that just because someone has
- 5:14:10experience, if they're not contributing
- 5:14:11it to the partnership clearly, then
- 5:14:13you're still not going to get the
- 5:14:14benefit from it. If they have the time
- 5:14:16and the energy, but it's not clearly
- 5:14:17defined how they're going to invest that
- 5:14:18time and energy into the things so you
- 5:14:20both get a return, then it's not going
- 5:14:22to be a good partnership. And I've lost
- 5:14:23so much money in partnerships,
- 5:14:25especially early on. One of my two big
- 5:14:27losses was from a partner. And a big
- 5:14:30part of it was I was insecure and I
- 5:14:32thought I just had to have somebody else
- 5:14:33cuz I was afraid to do it on my own. If
- 5:14:35you are a business owner and you're
- 5:14:37trying to scale and you're doing a
- 5:14:38million bucks a year and you want to go
- 5:14:39bigger, go to acquisition.com, hit
- 5:14:41scale, and uh we'd love to see if we
- 5:14:43could help you out at one of the
- 5:14:44workshops we run here in Vegas. [snorts]
- 5:14:47Which brings me to number five. If you
- 5:14:49never learn to manage your time, you're
- 5:14:51never going to learn to manage your
- 5:14:52money. And so the thing is is that all
- 5:14:54of us obviously have equal amounts of
- 5:14:56time that we're given, not necessarily
- 5:14:57in life, but at least every day. And so
- 5:15:00the people who get the best returns on
- 5:15:02their money are the ones who learn how
- 5:15:04to best invest their time. And so a big
- 5:15:07misconception around money is that money
- 5:15:09in my opinion is an encapsulated version
- 5:15:12of time. And since all of us trade time
- 5:15:15for the money that we get, then it means
- 5:15:17for each person money represents a
- 5:15:19certain amount of time. And the
- 5:15:20wealthier you get, it's just that the
- 5:15:22denomination of money represents less
- 5:15:24time for you. And so for someone else,
- 5:15:27$100 may represent four hours. For a
- 5:15:30wealthier person, $100 may represent
- 5:15:33four minutes. And so it's a constant
- 5:15:35appraisal that you do on a regular
- 5:15:37basis, looking on your calendar and
- 5:15:38saying, "What things do I have here that
- 5:15:41I could trade my time for for more
- 5:15:43money?" And so again, this video is
- 5:15:45about making money overall. I'm not
- 5:15:47saying that you can't spend time with
- 5:15:49your girl, but there is a transaction
- 5:15:51cost for that time. and as long as
- 5:15:53you're willing to make the the trade,
- 5:15:54then trade it all day. But the bad
- 5:15:56trades are the one that when you
- 5:15:57actually think about it in terms of what
- 5:15:59it costs, you'd say, "I wouldn't do the
- 5:16:01trade." That's a bad deal. And so over
- 5:16:04time, if you continue to trade up how
- 5:16:06much time you invest for what it makes
- 5:16:09you, you will always make more in your
- 5:16:12income year after year after year.
- 5:16:14Number six, check your bank account
- 5:16:16before you check social media first
- 5:16:18thing in the morning. And if it hurts
- 5:16:20you to check your bank account first
- 5:16:22thing, then you need to do it even more
- 5:16:24because for me, I started not knowing
- 5:16:27where my money was going. And so I had a
- 5:16:30friend who was like, "Dude, just look."
- 5:16:32And I honestly had anxiety looking in my
- 5:16:34bank account, looking at what money was
- 5:16:36going out and all that kind of stuff.
- 5:16:38And so I started making that habit. And
- 5:16:41I had to confront it. But the crazy
- 5:16:42thing is is as I started looking at my
- 5:16:45money, as I started paying attention to
- 5:16:47my money, my money started paying
- 5:16:48attention to me and hanging around. And
- 5:16:51so Peter Ducker said, "What gets
- 5:16:54measured gets managed." And so one of
- 5:16:56the most fascinating things that I found
- 5:16:58with human behavior in any kind of
- 5:17:00change is that the first thing that you
- 5:17:02can do to improve any metric for any
- 5:17:05skill is to actually measure it. And so
- 5:17:07if you want to lose weight, if you weigh
- 5:17:09yourself every day, no matter how
- 5:17:11painful the number is. That intervention
- 5:17:13alone helps people lose weight. You
- 5:17:15don't even have to talk about diet. You
- 5:17:17don't have to tell someone to exercise.
- 5:17:18If they look at the scale every day,
- 5:17:20they become aware of it. And when you
- 5:17:22become aware of a problem, you start
- 5:17:23consciously or subconsciously making
- 5:17:25moves to change it. You have that
- 5:17:27hesitation before you put that food in
- 5:17:28your mouth. You have that hesitation
- 5:17:29before you take your wallet out when
- 5:17:31you're looking at your bank account
- 5:17:32every day. It doesn't matter what it is,
- 5:17:34whatever you're trying to improve, but
- 5:17:35look at it. confront reality and then
- 5:17:38reality will start to improve. And if
- 5:17:40you're curious, how long do you still
- 5:17:42check your bank account in every day?
- 5:17:43And I the honest truth is I stopped
- 5:17:45checking when we had about 20 million
- 5:17:46bucks. Um and so that started when I had
- 5:17:49in the hundreds to thousands
- 5:17:51uh and continue to check every day. And
- 5:17:53when I stopped checking it was I
- 5:17:55realized my daily fluctuations in in
- 5:17:58market movements and things like that
- 5:18:00across my assets. uh it like I didn't I
- 5:18:03I basically wasn't able to really see it
- 5:18:05on a daily basis. So I had to start
- 5:18:07extending my time horizon for when I
- 5:18:09would check it. So it' be monthly or
- 5:18:10quarterly that I started checking it. Uh
- 5:18:12because that way at least I know I
- 5:18:14should have some movement upwards. And
- 5:18:16that is something that if you've done
- 5:18:19checking your bank account every single
- 5:18:20day for years, you start to already have
- 5:18:23developed some of those disciplined
- 5:18:25skills, which then you can delay
- 5:18:27gratification of having saved money for
- 5:18:29a day to having saved money for a
- 5:18:31quarter. Number seven, learn how to make
- 5:18:34money before you start trying to learn
- 5:18:36how to make money make money. So, I see
- 5:18:39so many guys, especially young guys, who
- 5:18:41are like, "I've got a,000 bucks. How do
- 5:18:43I invest the $1,000?" They're trying to
- 5:18:45figure out a way to get that $1,000 to
- 5:18:46compound. They put into a compounding
- 5:18:48calculator and they're like, "Man, if I
- 5:18:50get 50% returns for the next 40 years,
- 5:18:52I'm going to be a billionaire." But the
- 5:18:54thing is is that one, it's most likely
- 5:18:56that you're going to buy a [ __ ]
- 5:18:57Dogecoin and then it's going to tank and
- 5:18:59then you're just going to lose your
- 5:19:00$1,000 and be like, "Wow, think about
- 5:19:02this. I just worked for two weeks or one
- 5:19:05month to save that $1,000 and I lost it
- 5:19:08in seconds." So, alternatively, if you
- 5:19:10take that $1,000 and you put it into how
- 5:19:13do I make more money? How do I actively
- 5:19:16improve the actions and skills that I
- 5:19:17have, that will get you far more? And
- 5:19:20that is where you invest the time rather
- 5:19:22than how do I make money make money? Cuz
- 5:19:24let's be real, you don't have much. So,
- 5:19:26take the money you have into the skill,
- 5:19:28the flow of making more money rather
- 5:19:30than trying to take this tiny thing and
- 5:19:32going from a 10% return to a 20% return.
- 5:19:34Because the hundred bucks extra that you
- 5:19:36yield on that thousand dollar, I promise
- 5:19:38you, if you learn how to add 50% to your
- 5:19:41skill set, it'll take whatever your
- 5:19:42annual earning is up by 50%. And that's
- 5:19:45going to be a hell of a lot more than
- 5:19:4610. And that's assuming everything goes
- 5:19:48up this year, which one out of four
- 5:19:50years it doesn't. When you say you don't
- 5:19:52have time, just immediately think to
- 5:19:54yourself, I'm lying. This is [ __ ]
- 5:19:57Because every single person has between
- 5:19:595 to 9:00 a.m. and 5 to 9:00 p.m. every
- 5:20:02day of the week. even if you have a
- 5:20:0440-hour job, even if you're a full-time
- 5:20:06student, because everybody has those
- 5:20:08eight hours per day. Now, the thing is
- 5:20:10is that we're not willing to make the
- 5:20:12trade-offs because we have these things
- 5:20:13that make us comfortable. Cool. If you
- 5:20:15reframe that thing as the thing that
- 5:20:17makes me comfortable today is the thing
- 5:20:18that's going to make me uncomfortable
- 5:20:19for a decade. All of a sudden, the cost
- 5:20:22of that comfort goes up. And so, then it
- 5:20:25flips to if I can become uncomfortable
- 5:20:26for today, I can be comfortable for
- 5:20:28decades. And so then you can seek out
- 5:20:30those eight hours and say, "You know
- 5:20:32what? I'm going to flip this thing." And
- 5:20:33here's the crazy part about work. Work
- 5:20:35makes you money in two ways. One, you
- 5:20:38work and you make money. And secondly,
- 5:20:40when you're working, you're not spending
- 5:20:42money. And so when you're starting out,
- 5:20:44you literally have a double effect. The
- 5:20:46the money that you're making the whole
- 5:20:47way through is stacking up because
- 5:20:49there's no drains on it either. And so
- 5:20:51one of the biggest advantages you have
- 5:20:52is that you stay busy. One of the keys
- 5:20:55to investing is patience. What is
- 5:20:57patience? Patience is figuring out
- 5:20:59activities to do in the meantime. Think
- 5:21:02about it for a second. Unpack that.
- 5:21:04Patience is figuring out what to do in
- 5:21:06the meantime. So then if the goal is to
- 5:21:09get rich, and we know that that takes
- 5:21:11time, and it takes time for money to
- 5:21:14compound and grow, then what you do in
- 5:21:16the meantime is that you work so that
- 5:21:19you have even more money to invest. And
- 5:21:21that money has the time to invest and
- 5:21:23compound while you're working. And I am
- 5:21:26so passionate about this because this
- 5:21:27isn't something that I didn't do, right?
- 5:21:30Like when I had my job in the beginning,
- 5:21:32I just wasn't really taking the time
- 5:21:34that I should have. And then I was like,
- 5:21:35you know what? I don't want to do this
- 5:21:36thing forever. I got to get ahead. But I
- 5:21:38couldn't stop doing my job. So I started
- 5:21:40spending my mornings and my evenings
- 5:21:42every day and both weekend days working
- 5:21:44on what I was going to do next. And in
- 5:21:46the beginning, that was studying for the
- 5:21:48GMAT because I thought business school
- 5:21:49was going to be the next move. But after
- 5:21:51studying for the GMAT and crushing the
- 5:21:52test, I came to another realization,
- 5:21:54which was, I'm going to go to business
- 5:21:56school because I want to start a
- 5:21:57business. Well, you know what? It's
- 5:21:58going to cost me less than two years and
- 5:22:00$180,000 plus what I didn't make during
- 5:22:03the two years of not working. I could
- 5:22:05probably net $10,000 a year of income,
- 5:22:08which is what the average business
- 5:22:09school person graduated with when I was
- 5:22:11looking at business school. And I was
- 5:22:13like, I think I could get to 10 grand a
- 5:22:14month if I had two years to work and
- 5:22:16didn't spend 180 grand and I took that
- 5:22:18money and just put it into a business.
- 5:22:20Now you're like, "Well, you didn't even
- 5:22:21have 180 grand." You're damn right I
- 5:22:22didn't. I was able to save up 50 and I
- 5:22:24was like, "I think with this 50, I'll be
- 5:22:25able to spend it to learn enough to make
- 5:22:2810 grand a month." And that's what I
- 5:22:29did. Nine. If you don't know how you can
- 5:22:31lose money in something, then you're
- 5:22:33going to lose it. Think about this for a
- 5:22:35second. If something looks amazing and
- 5:22:37you're like, "Dude, there's no way I can
- 5:22:39lose money on this." You're absolutely
- 5:22:40going to lose your ass because of how
- 5:22:42little you actually know. And so you
- 5:22:44have to figure out one, what is my
- 5:22:46downside and all the different ways that
- 5:22:49downside can occur and then attach a
- 5:22:51reasonable likelihood that that happens
- 5:22:53and then probably multiply it by three
- 5:22:56because whenever you have your
- 5:22:57rosecolored glasses on, you're an
- 5:22:59entrepreneur or you want to be an
- 5:23:00entrepreneur, one of the quintessential
- 5:23:02traits of entrepreneurship is optimism.
- 5:23:04We are optimists. We think it's all
- 5:23:06going to work out and you have to have
- 5:23:07that level of optimism to start. But
- 5:23:10when you start, you can't continue to
- 5:23:12have that optimism around every other
- 5:23:14opportunity because then you are going
- 5:23:16to lose your ass because you're going to
- 5:23:17be split between multiple things. And so
- 5:23:20if you don't know how you can lose
- 5:23:21money, you absolutely will because it
- 5:23:24just is an index of how little you know.
- 5:23:2810. The biggest cost that you have is
- 5:23:32ignorance. So every single month you've
- 5:23:34got your rent, you've got your food,
- 5:23:36you've got your clothes, you got your
- 5:23:37car, you got whatever else you spend and
- 5:23:39you think that's my fixed costs. Years
- 5:23:41ago I was sitting in the audience and I
- 5:23:42saw a man write a million on a
- 5:23:45whiteboard and he called someone from
- 5:23:46the audience. He said, "How much do you
- 5:23:47make per year?" And they said, " $50,000
- 5:23:50a year." And he said, "Would you like to
- 5:23:51make a million a year?" And the person
- 5:23:53said, "Yes." And then he put a minus
- 5:23:54sign and he said, "Did you know that
- 5:23:56it's costing you $950,000 per year to
- 5:23:59not know how to make a million dollar a
- 5:24:01year?" And it was such a light bulb
- 5:24:03moment for me that I realized that the
- 5:24:06cost of ignorance is the difference
- 5:24:08between what your goals are and what you
- 5:24:10have today. Because if you knew how to
- 5:24:12achieve your goals, the difference is
- 5:24:15the value of that education. And
- 5:24:17conversely, the difference is the cost
- 5:24:20of that debt of ignorance. And so the
- 5:24:23number one priority in my life has
- 5:24:25always been to pay down ignorance as
- 5:24:27fast as I possibly could using whatever
- 5:24:29currency I needed to. So if that was
- 5:24:31relational capital that means using my
- 5:24:33network or doing favors for people or
- 5:24:35paying money which is the least
- 5:24:36efficient way of doing it. I would try
- 5:24:38and find a way that I could pay down
- 5:24:39ignorance to achieve the things that I
- 5:24:41wanted so I could get the information so
- 5:24:42I could get the learning. When I started
- 5:24:44um I paid to get into rooms. I paid
- 5:24:47$25,000 $35,000. And you're like wait I
- 5:24:49don't have that right now. I get it.
- 5:24:50Well you pay $10,000 was the first thing
- 5:24:52I ever bought that was information
- 5:24:53based. That's what I was the first thing
- 5:24:55I ever invested. And how was I able to
- 5:24:56do that? Because I had saved for two
- 5:24:58years and I'd saved 50 grand up. And so
- 5:25:00for me, I was like, "Okay, this is the
- 5:25:01direction I'm going in. I'm going to
- 5:25:03invest in learning." And when I got in
- 5:25:05that room, the first room I was in was a
- 5:25:07gym owner room, and I didn't have a gym.
- 5:25:09And I paid to be in that room so I could
- 5:25:11start the gym the right way. When I paid
- 5:25:12to the $25,000 room, it was an internet
- 5:25:14marketing room. And guess what? I didn't
- 5:25:16have an internet marketing business, but
- 5:25:18I paid there so I could try and learn
- 5:25:19how to do it the right way rather than
- 5:25:20try and start it the wrong way and have
- 5:25:21to fix it. And so, I think a lot of
- 5:25:23people wait too long to try and learn. I
- 5:25:25always want to grab my future and pull
- 5:25:27it towards me. And so I was willing to
- 5:25:29spend as much money as I had available
- 5:25:31to me to make those bets because it was
- 5:25:33a bet on me and I knew I would never
- 5:25:34lose that. You can't lose you. You
- 5:25:36always have diamond hands on you. Like
- 5:25:38till the day you die, you've got you.
- 5:25:40And so the thing is about investing in
- 5:25:42education is that sometimes the lessons
- 5:25:44you learn aren't the lessons you expect
- 5:25:46to learn, but you learn them
- 5:25:47nonetheless. And so sometimes you go
- 5:25:49into an education thing and you don't
- 5:25:50get what you thought, but you still get
- 5:25:51something and it was still more than
- 5:25:53what you paid. And so when I went into
- 5:25:54those rooms, I'd already used up all my
- 5:25:56money to get in the room. So I was like,
- 5:25:57"Okay, what else do I have?" And so at
- 5:25:59the time I knew how to sell. And so I
- 5:26:01just went to every single person in the
- 5:26:02room and was like, "Can I help you sell
- 5:26:04stuff?" And so they'd be like, "Well,
- 5:26:06sure, my sales team sucks." Or, "Sure,
- 5:26:08my my script sucks." Or, "Sure, my offer
- 5:26:10sucks." Or, "I don't know how to
- 5:26:11overcome these objections." And so I
- 5:26:12would spend an hour, 2 hours, 3 hours on
- 5:26:15the phone with these people training
- 5:26:16their teams, writing scripts. And they
- 5:26:18were like, "Dude, thanks so much. This
- 5:26:20is way I can't believe you did all
- 5:26:21this." And the thing is is that if
- 5:26:23you're going to pay for help from
- 5:26:25someone, pay in full.
- 5:26:28Don't halfass a free gift. And so if
- 5:26:32you're good at something, you're good at
- 5:26:34a skill, you're an accountant, you don't
- 5:26:36do one page of someone's taxes. If
- 5:26:38you're going to do a favor, you do the
- 5:26:40whole thing. You treat them like they're
- 5:26:42a paying customer and then they will
- 5:26:43respond as though you have paid them.
- 5:26:46And so it will be like you've given them
- 5:26:47money and then you will get that
- 5:26:48reciprocity. And at the time when I did
- 5:26:50those favors for all those people, I
- 5:26:52didn't know what I was going to ask for.
- 5:26:53I just knew that I would need someone's
- 5:26:55help in the room. And I'd rather have
- 5:26:57more phone numbers I could call for help
- 5:26:59that owed me one than none. And when I
- 5:27:02wanted to make a webinar, I called one
- 5:27:04of the people who's good at webinars.
- 5:27:05When I wanted to run ads, I called the
- 5:27:06guy who's really good at running ads.
- 5:27:08When I wanted to uh figure out funnels
- 5:27:10and landing pages and stuff, I called
- 5:27:12the guy who was really good at funnels
- 5:27:13and landing pages, cuz each of those
- 5:27:14guys wasn't good at what I was good at.
- 5:27:16And so we're able to barter, which by
- 5:27:18the way, still to this day is the most
- 5:27:20efficient form of trade because Uncle
- 5:27:21Sam don't take any piece of it for us or
- 5:27:25them. Everybody wins. 11. There's two
- 5:27:28types of things that you can learn. And
- 5:27:30so if you're trying to pay down
- 5:27:31ignorance, you got to know what you're
- 5:27:32buying. So you can learn about
- 5:27:35something, something that exists that
- 5:27:37you didn't know existed. And then you
- 5:27:39can learn how to do something. And so
- 5:27:41one is called declarative knowledge,
- 5:27:43knowledge of existence. The other is
- 5:27:45called procedural knowledge which is
- 5:27:46knowing how to do it. And so if I
- 5:27:48explain to you that private equity
- 5:27:49exists and this is how you can buy,
- 5:27:51package and sell a business for a lot of
- 5:27:53money. Now you know about it which is a
- 5:27:56prerequisite for learning how to do it.
- 5:27:58And so when you buy into access to
- 5:28:01networks to people to relationships the
- 5:28:03primary thing that you're learning is
- 5:28:05learning about things that exist.
- 5:28:07They're going to tell you tax
- 5:28:08strategies, investment strategy,
- 5:28:10marketing strategy, sales strategies,
- 5:28:12business models that you haven't heard
- 5:28:13of. That is what you learn there. But if
- 5:28:16they tell you those things, you leave
- 5:28:17and you get excited. But then you're
- 5:28:19like, well, shoot, how do I do it? Which
- 5:28:20is the second thing that you learn how
- 5:28:22to do, which is the how part. And so
- 5:28:24when you're going into any kind of
- 5:28:26investment, whether you're investing
- 5:28:28time, you're investing trade, you're
- 5:28:29doing some work for someone so they do
- 5:28:31work for you back, or you're investing
- 5:28:32money, you better be sure what you're
- 5:28:34buying. And the interesting thing about
- 5:28:37those two types of knowledge is that the
- 5:28:39declarative knowledge tends to teach you
- 5:28:41things that you didn't know existed.
- 5:28:44It's the unknown unknowns. That is why
- 5:28:46some of these are the biggest
- 5:28:47breakthroughs. When you get into those
- 5:28:48rooms with someone making 10 or 100
- 5:28:50times more than you, they see the world
- 5:28:51in a different way. Whereas when you go
- 5:28:53for how to, it's more predictable what
- 5:28:55you're going to get because you're
- 5:28:57specifically trying to learn how the
- 5:28:59skill is. You know it exists and you
- 5:29:00just need to clarify the steps to
- 5:29:01getting there. And so just delineating
- 5:29:03what you're trying to learn will help
- 5:29:05you actually learn it. So the first time
- 5:29:07I learned declarative knowledge was that
- 5:29:09Facebook ads existed. That was in 2013.
- 5:29:12And so I learned how they how they
- 5:29:14worked and I learned just enough to make
- 5:29:16them work. So I learned declarative
- 5:29:17knowledge that they existed and I
- 5:29:18learned how to do them in one weekend.
- 5:29:20Super valuable. Now I was able to ride
- 5:29:23that skill set for a couple years until
- 5:29:25I was like you know what I need to learn
- 5:29:27how to do this at a bigger scale. I
- 5:29:28wanted to go national with started gym
- 5:29:30launch do the turnarounds. And so I was
- 5:29:31like, I need somebody cuz I had only run
- 5:29:33local ads, which by the way are much
- 5:29:34easier than national style ads. And so I
- 5:29:37tried to go all around asking people for
- 5:29:38help. And at this point, I had probably
- 5:29:41used up the relational capital that I
- 5:29:42had before. So I called a bunch of
- 5:29:44agencies. All of them said they were
- 5:29:45going to charge me too much money that I
- 5:29:46could afford. And then finally, I just
- 5:29:48asked one guy, "Hey, instead of your
- 5:29:49monthly rate of $5,000 a month, which I
- 5:29:52couldn't even come close to affording at
- 5:29:53the time, I was like, can I just pay you
- 5:29:55per hour?" Now, of course, he said, "I
- 5:29:57don't trade my time for money." except
- 5:29:59of course he works overtime and then he
- 5:30:01gets money later but sure anyways he
- 5:30:03doesn't trade time for money and I said
- 5:30:04it's America everything's got a price
- 5:30:06and he said you know what 750 an hour
- 5:30:09I'll do it and I was like done now mind
- 5:30:12you 750 an hour was still a ton of money
- 5:30:13for me and so I showed up like it was
- 5:30:15Harvard on steroids for these calls cuz
- 5:30:17I I would prep for the call I had my
- 5:30:18notes out I recorded it I was like I had
- 5:30:21two people in the room be like make sure
- 5:30:22I don't miss anything right and so I
- 5:30:24would go and I had him first document
- 5:30:27the process of what he did to run ads as
- 5:30:31though he were me. Then I had him
- 5:30:33demonstrate it. So he clicked the
- 5:30:35buttons so I could see what he was doing
- 5:30:37and I had him stop and explain to me
- 5:30:38each of the steps so I could put it into
- 5:30:40my little checklist too. And then
- 5:30:41finally I duplicated in front of him
- 5:30:43which means document demonstrate
- 5:30:45duplicate. I then did in front of him to
- 5:30:47make sure that I was doing it right. And
- 5:30:49so once I did it right and I did it
- 5:30:50right multiple times in a row and I
- 5:30:52didn't need him to to to correct me
- 5:30:54while I was doing it, that's when I had
- 5:30:56mastered the skill. It took me eight
- 5:30:57sessions. So, it took me eight hours and
- 5:31:00whatever that is times 750 in order to
- 5:31:02learn 12. A watch isn't going to replace
- 5:31:05work. A Rolex isn't going to replace
- 5:31:08reality. And so, what happens a lot of
- 5:31:10times when you're coming up is that you
- 5:31:12want to get status, right? You feel
- 5:31:14downtrodden. You feel like no one
- 5:31:15respects you. And that's normal as a
- 5:31:17young man. That's what you do. You don't
- 5:31:18have any status. That's what you come
- 5:31:20into the world as. And you got to go
- 5:31:21make it. And so the thing that you want
- 5:31:24to do early on is get status as fast as
- 5:31:26possible. The thing is is a lot of times
- 5:31:28you trade short-term status at the
- 5:31:29expense of long-term. And so as somebody
- 5:31:31who has lots of young men in my audience
- 5:31:34and middle-aged men in my audience,
- 5:31:36you'll never impress someone who's
- 5:31:38wealthier than you with assets.
- 5:31:41You'll only impress people below you. So
- 5:31:44you have the wrong target audience
- 5:31:46because to impress poor people, you
- 5:31:48outspend them. to impress rich people,
- 5:31:50you outwork them. And once I understood
- 5:31:53this, I was like, "Oh, the guys who are
- 5:31:55at the top of the game give me respect
- 5:31:58because they know I'm a future one of
- 5:32:00them because they know when they were my
- 5:32:02age, they double down on the hustle, not
- 5:32:04the highlight reel." And that
- 5:32:06overspending on status happens at every
- 5:32:08level. So, in the beginning, it's a
- 5:32:10watch, right? And a little bit later, it
- 5:32:12might be a car payment. And a little bit
- 5:32:14later, it might be a really big
- 5:32:16expensive car payment. And then it might
- 5:32:18be a really big condo and then it might
- 5:32:19be a really nice house and then it might
- 5:32:22become a yacht and then becomes a jet.
- 5:32:23And the thing is is that you add zeros
- 5:32:25to it but again you only impress the
- 5:32:27people underneath of you not the people
- 5:32:29above you. And if you want to impress
- 5:32:30the people underneath of you by all
- 5:32:32means do it. But know that that's what
- 5:32:35you're about. Buy time like a rich
- 5:32:37person. Buy stuff like a poor person.
- 5:32:40And so when you're thinking about time
- 5:32:44being the most valuable thing, if you've
- 5:32:46already dedicated yourself to working
- 5:32:47and earning an income and learning the
- 5:32:49skills, then you just want to pour as
- 5:32:52much time into that as you can. And so
- 5:32:53fundamentally, you're buying your time
- 5:32:55back, your lowcost time or low income
- 5:32:58time. So it's prepping food, going
- 5:33:01grocery shopping, cleaning your house,
- 5:33:04whatever else you do with more income
- 5:33:07earning time. I remember the first time
- 5:33:09I closed a $500 sale at my gym. I
- 5:33:12realized that that sale took me 30
- 5:33:13minutes. And I knew that for me to buy
- 5:33:16groceries for the whole month four times
- 5:33:18would take me $500 and far more than 30
- 5:33:22minutes. And so I thought to myself, my
- 5:33:24god, if all of that time I was grocery
- 5:33:26shopping and and food prepping and and
- 5:33:28and and cleaning up after myself and
- 5:33:30then doing laundry, if all of that time
- 5:33:33I could just sell more in a couple
- 5:33:35hours, I could do all of that stuff for
- 5:33:37free. And my poor mind was like, "Hey,
- 5:33:39that's wasteful. You could be doing that
- 5:33:41stuff on your own." But you buy time
- 5:33:43like you're rich. You spend money on
- 5:33:46stuff like you're poor. So buy time, not
- 5:33:48stuff. Because when you buy time, you
- 5:33:50can replace the money you bought it with
- 5:33:52and some. Let me put some real numbers
- 5:33:54to this. So the average American spends
- 5:33:57$1,500 a month on 96 hours of work. And
- 5:34:03that breaks down roughly to cleaning
- 5:34:05their house, cleaning their clothes,
- 5:34:09buying food, preparing food, and
- 5:34:12cleaning food. I'm not even going to get
- 5:34:14into the 4 hours a day that the average
- 5:34:16person spends on social media and
- 5:34:18watching television. You're going to
- 5:34:19keep doing that, so I'm not even going
- 5:34:20to try to convince you not to. But if
- 5:34:22you just replace those things that you
- 5:34:23probably don't want to do, it costs
- 5:34:25about $1,500 per month. And so as long
- 5:34:27as you make more than $15 per hour,
- 5:34:30because it cost about 96 hours to
- 5:34:32replace those activities, which means if
- 5:34:33I can replace 96 hours of work for
- 5:34:35$1,500, and it's also 96 hours of
- 5:34:38draining work. Like it expends energy.
- 5:34:41It's not like you just sit there for 96
- 5:34:42hours, you're actually getting actively
- 5:34:44tired from doing that stuff. If you took
- 5:34:47that same thing and if you make more
- 5:34:48than $15 per hour in your active job, it
- 5:34:51makes sense. It's the logical decision
- 5:34:53for you to buy that and then go make
- 5:34:56more because you're also going to make
- 5:34:57money twice. Not only are you going to
- 5:35:00save the time and then work and make
- 5:35:02more, but you also get better at your
- 5:35:05job because all of those extra hours
- 5:35:07aren't just making you more money.
- 5:35:09You're also becoming more skilled. So,
- 5:35:10you get better faster. And so if I have
- 5:35:13a year-long guy where he spends $1,500 a
- 5:35:16month to replace all of those things at
- 5:35:18the end of that year, not only does he
- 5:35:20have more money at the end end of the
- 5:35:21year, but because he had an extra 100
- 5:35:23hours of high energy time that he didn't
- 5:35:26have to spend per month, he's getting
- 5:35:2950% better per year. And so that assumes
- 5:35:32that he doesn't get rewarded in his work
- 5:35:34for getting better, which by the way, in
- 5:35:36reality, you typically do as long as you
- 5:35:39ask. who you compare yourself to, not
- 5:35:41who you spend your most time with, will
- 5:35:43be the highest predictor of how much you
- 5:35:45make. And so we are motivated by the
- 5:35:47things that we lack. And so if you're
- 5:35:49very hungry, it's because you lack food.
- 5:35:51If you lack sleep, you're very tired.
- 5:35:53You're very motivated to sleep. And so
- 5:35:55if you want to be motivated to make
- 5:35:57money, it's not enough to not have
- 5:35:58money. You have to have a desire to make
- 5:36:02a lot more money. And the strongest way
- 5:36:04to create that desire is to visually see
- 5:36:08the people who are making far more than
- 5:36:09you. And so it's about who you compare
- 5:36:12yourself to, not who you spend time
- 5:36:13with. Fundamentally, the richest man in
- 5:36:15the world only spends time with people
- 5:36:17poorer than him. But he continues to get
- 5:36:18richer because he's comparing himself to
- 5:36:20the future version of himself. That's
- 5:36:22his reference point. That's his
- 5:36:23reference group. And when you start out,
- 5:36:25there's real people. As you evolve, it
- 5:36:27becomes imaginary. I heard this quote
- 5:36:29from one person to another when I was
- 5:36:31walking through the street and he was
- 5:36:32talking about buying something that was
- 5:36:36a no a no return investment. Let's call
- 5:36:38it a big toy. And he said there will
- 5:36:41always be time to make money later. And
- 5:36:44I remember hearing that and thinking
- 5:36:47that's what someone who's poor says.
- 5:36:52And so to be clear, I think if you want
- 5:36:54to enjoy life, by all means do it. This
- 5:36:57video is about making more money. That's
- 5:36:59the stated objective. And so that's what
- 5:37:01I'm talking about. And so the idea that
- 5:37:04you're going to spend now, work later is
- 5:37:07the fundamental crux of poverty.
- 5:37:10And so you have to break that with all
- 5:37:12your heart. And when you have those
- 5:37:15people around you, and this was a toy,
- 5:37:16but it could be let's go out, we it
- 5:37:18always comes under the guise of yolo. We
- 5:37:21have to live life. But everyone who says
- 5:37:23that assumes that getting better and
- 5:37:26learning is not life
- 5:37:29and is not living. And for me, the
- 5:37:33purpose of my life is to learn as much
- 5:37:35as I can and pay down ignorance as much
- 5:37:37as I possibly can and squeeze the last
- 5:37:39drop of potential out of me that I can.
- 5:37:41And the way that I do that is through
- 5:37:43learning. And so for every person that
- 5:37:45asks you to sacrifice working now so
- 5:37:48that you can have fun now, just make
- 5:37:50sure you know the trade you're making.
- 5:37:52I'll be real with you. There's no
- 5:37:53perfect way to live your 20s or even
- 5:37:56your 30s. You either end up an
- 5:37:58underkilled 30-year-old or 40-year-old
- 5:38:02or an underlived 30-year-old or
- 5:38:0540-year-old. And so, fundamentally, it's
- 5:38:08not either or, but knowing the trade-off
- 5:38:11and living with the consequences because
- 5:38:12you can't do them over. And on a
- 5:38:15personal note, I sacrificed or said
- 5:38:17differently, invested my 20s in order to
- 5:38:20have lots of skills and underlived.
- 5:38:24But in that same time period, I built to
- 5:38:28where I am now. And I genuinely am very
- 5:38:31happy with where I am now in life. And I
- 5:38:34would not redo those years to have quote
- 5:38:36lived more because the real secret is as
- 5:38:39I was doing it, I loved the game. And so
- 5:38:42some of the best moments of my life when
- 5:38:44I look back were some of the moments
- 5:38:46that I felt like I was struggling the
- 5:38:47most because it was when I underwent the
- 5:38:49most growth. And so it's interesting
- 5:38:51because the pain that you go through in
- 5:38:52the moment often becomes the purpose
- 5:38:54that you look back on in your life. And
- 5:38:56so the idea that we want to avoid pain
- 5:38:58so that we can live today I think
- 5:39:00conflates reality because when you look
- 5:39:01back on your life a lot of times those
- 5:39:03are the things that define you. And so
- 5:39:04we should be seeking those out not
- 5:39:06running away from them. So if you're not
- 5:39:07sure who you compare yourself to versus
- 5:39:10who you spend time with when you're
- 5:39:12about to make a big decision, the people
- 5:39:14who come up in your mind who you're
- 5:39:16weighing their opinions on your
- 5:39:18decision, those are your reference group
- 5:39:20people. The people whose opinion you
- 5:39:22care about. And so if all your friends,
- 5:39:24for example, are billionaires and they
- 5:39:27all sacrificed their 20s, got rid of
- 5:39:29their friends, got rid of their material
- 5:39:30belonging, spent all their time working
- 5:39:31for free so that they could learn this
- 5:39:33big skill set and then doubled down in
- 5:39:35their late 20s and then made it big by
- 5:39:36the time they were in their 30s and 40s.
- 5:39:39Those people, if that was your reference
- 5:39:41group, if you're thinking about leaving
- 5:39:43home, what do you think that reference
- 5:39:44group's going to say? For sure. And
- 5:39:46because of that, you're out the door.
- 5:39:48And so whenever you have these
- 5:39:50frictional moments where you are like, I
- 5:39:51think I should do this, but whoever that
- 5:39:54person is, whoever that voice is, if
- 5:39:56they don't have what you want, don't
- 5:39:58listen to what they say. Only listen to
- 5:40:00other people's opinions about your life
- 5:40:02if their dreams for you are bigger than
- 5:40:04yours. If they're not, disregard.
- 5:40:07Invest, then spend the rest. So the idea
- 5:40:10is that you invest first and then spend
- 5:40:13what's left over. And so an interesting
- 5:40:14thing is that Switzerland has the
- 5:40:16highest per capita millionaires in the
- 5:40:18world without having the highest GDP or
- 5:40:21even GDP per capita. And so how are they
- 5:40:23able to do that? That means that they
- 5:40:24have different rules around money, which
- 5:40:26is what this video is about. And so if
- 5:40:28we adopt those rules, we can get those
- 5:40:31outcomes, which means these are just
- 5:40:32decisions that we get to make. And the
- 5:40:34easiest way to do that is you take what
- 5:40:36you need off the top and then you spend
- 5:40:38the rest on what you want. And so it
- 5:40:41comes down to saying that you need your
- 5:40:43future. You need your future self to be
- 5:40:45bigger than your current self today. And
- 5:40:47so you invest first and then you spend
- 5:40:50the rest. And so the way that I like to
- 5:40:53think about this is point 16. This is
- 5:40:55how we operationalize this, which is
- 5:40:57automate investing and then create
- 5:40:59friction around spending. And so you
- 5:41:02want to take the money off before you
- 5:41:04see it. If your job, for example, has a
- 5:41:06way that they can automatically skim off
- 5:41:07your paycheck and put it into some sort
- 5:41:09of investment stuff, do it. If they
- 5:41:11don't have that, have one of these apps
- 5:41:13that does segmentation or has multiple
- 5:41:16bank accounts that you can say, "This
- 5:41:17automatically goes here. This
- 5:41:19automatically goes here, and I don't
- 5:41:20touch this." And if you want to get real
- 5:41:23crazy, the advanced version of this is
- 5:41:25that as you make more money, you keep
- 5:41:27what you're living the spend the rest
- 5:41:30part, instead of making it a percentage,
- 5:41:32make it a fixed amount. And then as you
- 5:41:34make more, you're just investing more
- 5:41:36and more and more into the future. Now,
- 5:41:39you're like, "Well, how do I invest in
- 5:41:40the future if I'm just starting out?"
- 5:41:41The future is you. But you're making
- 5:41:44sure that when you're investing that
- 5:41:45money, you know, whether you're buying
- 5:41:46declarative knowledge or you're buying
- 5:41:48procedural knowledge, you're learning
- 5:41:50about stuff that you need to learn or
- 5:41:51you're learning how to do it. And the
- 5:41:53longer you do this, the easier it gets.
- 5:41:56For the record, I have zero
- 5:41:57Lamborghinis, zero Rolexes, zero jets,
- 5:42:02while also being able to buy multiple of
- 5:42:04these every single month. And so, the
- 5:42:08idea is you start to become addicted to
- 5:42:12getting good. And once you get that
- 5:42:14first little reward of seeing an
- 5:42:16investment that you made in yourself
- 5:42:18start paying off, you see your income go
- 5:42:19up, you start making more money, you're
- 5:42:21like, "Oh my god, this game is awesome."
- 5:42:23And so that flow of investment that
- 5:42:26comes to you is one of the best games
- 5:42:29that you want to win for yourself. You
- 5:42:31want to just keep seeing keep making
- 5:42:33cash flow PRs. Keep making that
- 5:42:35investment account PR and hit records in
- 5:42:37that account. And if you get addicted to
- 5:42:39that game, if you can just do that from
- 5:42:41everything in this video, you've already
- 5:42:43won. And so you want to automate
- 5:42:45deposits and manualize withdrawals. So
- 5:42:49everything that is automatic in terms
- 5:42:51like your rent, you want to write it as
- 5:42:53a check. If you or drop it off as cash,
- 5:42:56if you have payments that you make like
- 5:42:58a car payment, as much as you're like,
- 5:43:00"Wait, this is going to cost time." The
- 5:43:02value that you get back for knowing
- 5:43:03exactly where you spend your money is
- 5:43:06going to make you more money than the
- 5:43:07one hour a month that you have to pay
- 5:43:09your bills. That is a promise. And so
- 5:43:12that may also mean if you make it
- 5:43:14difficult to buy, well then maybe you
- 5:43:16delete some of the apps on your phone,
- 5:43:19maybe you don't save your credit cards
- 5:43:20on the sites that you tend to spend
- 5:43:22money on. You want to make it as hard as
- 5:43:24you can to spend money and make it as
- 5:43:26easy as possible to stack it. Number 17,
- 5:43:30it's easier to make a million than it is
- 5:43:33to make $100,000. And let me explain. If
- 5:43:36I told you to go down the block, you
- 5:43:38would go at a certain speed. If I said
- 5:43:41go as fast as you possibly can, at some
- 5:43:43point you'd run and then you'd improve
- 5:43:45your form and you get better footwear
- 5:43:46and then you'd change your clothes, but
- 5:43:48at some point you wouldn't be able to
- 5:43:49run any harder or any faster to get
- 5:43:51there. But if I said, "I need you to go
- 5:43:53five blocks." You might be like, "Huh,
- 5:43:56okay." Now, some people will then try to
- 5:43:58walk or run that, but the smart cookie
- 5:44:02then says, "Huh, I could take a car and
- 5:44:05I would go a hell of a lot faster." And
- 5:44:08if I'm speeding in my car, I'll probably
- 5:44:10get to the fifth block before the other
- 5:44:12guy gets to the end of the first block.
- 5:44:14And so the magic of thinking bigger is
- 5:44:17that you change your solution set.
- 5:44:20Meaning you use different tools to
- 5:44:23accomplish the objective. The reason
- 5:44:25$100,000 per year is the hardest amount
- 5:44:26of money to make is because it assumes
- 5:44:29for most people that they will trade
- 5:44:31their time in terms of hourly wages or
- 5:44:33salary in traditional work in order to
- 5:44:35get it. And so they have to spend all of
- 5:44:37their time in order to make the
- 5:44:38$100,000.
- 5:44:39But if I said make a million or even 10
- 5:44:42million before the world explodes, you
- 5:44:44would know that you would have to use a
- 5:44:46different way of solving that problem.
- 5:44:48And so the reason it's easier to make a
- 5:44:51million or $10 million is because you
- 5:44:54can do it in less time with more skill
- 5:44:58if you start solving for the skills
- 5:45:01required to make a million or $10
- 5:45:03million. You don't want to love money.
- 5:45:06You want to learn to love making money.
- 5:45:08So there's two misconceptions and then
- 5:45:10one truth around this. The first
- 5:45:12misconception is money is the root of
- 5:45:14all evil. And then that obviously is a
- 5:45:17quote from the Bible, 1 Timothy 6:10.
- 5:45:20The 2011 version, someone says, "No,
- 5:45:22it's not money that's the root of all
- 5:45:24evil. It's the love of money that's the
- 5:45:26root of all evil." But that's just the
- 5:45:282011 version. The actual translation,
- 5:45:32there's five translations for it. And
- 5:45:34four of the five are the love of money
- 5:45:38is the root of all kinds of evil.
- 5:45:41Meaning, if you desire money more than
- 5:45:45anything else, then you will commit the
- 5:45:47other sins in order to attain it. And so
- 5:45:50the idea is that it's only a pathway
- 5:45:53that has a high likelihood of causing
- 5:45:56you to do things that are unethical or
- 5:45:58immoral. And so there's this huge
- 5:46:02terrible paradigm in society that money
- 5:46:04is somehow good or bad. It is just
- 5:46:07potential energy. It's just bottled
- 5:46:09time. And that bottled time can build
- 5:46:12bombs. That bottled time can build
- 5:46:14hospitals. It can build wells. It can
- 5:46:16build schools. It can make YouTube
- 5:46:17videos that educate. And so the idea
- 5:46:20that you're afraid to make money means
- 5:46:23that you're afraid of having power. And
- 5:46:26maybe you should be afraid of having
- 5:46:27power because maybe you'd misuse it. But
- 5:46:30if you do want to help the world, then
- 5:46:32all it's going to do is amplify your
- 5:46:34ability to do that. And if you have that
- 5:46:36mission on your heart or in your mind,
- 5:46:40then it's your duty to remove everything
- 5:46:43else in your [ __ ] way to go get it.
- 5:46:46The more money you make other people,
- 5:46:48the more money you make. And so the
- 5:46:50amount of money that you will be able to
- 5:46:51make in your career comes down to three
- 5:46:53variables. Number one is the value that
- 5:46:55you're able to create in total for all
- 5:46:58of the people you create it for. Times
- 5:47:01your ability to negotiate how much of
- 5:47:03that value you're able to get. Times
- 5:47:06number three, which is the amount of
- 5:47:09other people who can also create that
- 5:47:11value. And you have to have all three
- 5:47:14because for example, if you develop a
- 5:47:16skill of sales and you can create
- 5:47:18millions of dollars in value for a
- 5:47:20company and you're really good at
- 5:47:22negotiating, then in theory you'd get
- 5:47:24millions and millions of dollars from
- 5:47:26that company. But if somebody else is
- 5:47:28willing to work for a few hundred,000 a
- 5:47:30year in order to make that value, then
- 5:47:33your position disappears. And so that
- 5:47:35gives us the blueprint for making money
- 5:47:37is that not only do you want to be able
- 5:47:39to create that value, you want to be
- 5:47:41able to create a value in a way that no
- 5:47:43one else can. And the way that you do
- 5:47:45that is not by, in my opinion, learning
- 5:47:49some incredibly secret unique skill.
- 5:47:51What makes skills unique is the skill
- 5:47:54set. It's the stack of skills together
- 5:47:57that create the uniqueness. If someone
- 5:48:00else has to try and recreate something I
- 5:48:02could do, they would have to have lived
- 5:48:04my life. And so your life and the time
- 5:48:08you spend becomes your competitive
- 5:48:10advantage. It becomes your asset. It
- 5:48:12becomes the moat that other people can't
- 5:48:14chip into. They'd have to go through
- 5:48:16being a competitive fitness person and
- 5:48:18then go through owning lots of gyms and
- 5:48:20then go through doing turnarounds across
- 5:48:23the country and then go through doing a
- 5:48:24licensing business and then go through
- 5:48:26making a supplement business and then go
- 5:48:28through launching a meal prep business
- 5:48:30and then also starting a software
- 5:48:31company and then going through an exit
- 5:48:33for both and then starting a private
- 5:48:35equity. They'd have to do so much stuff.
- 5:48:37There are so many skills that are
- 5:48:39required. Your time is your weapon if
- 5:48:43you invest it wisely. And the one thing
- 5:48:45that I would leave you with is that
- 5:48:47money loves speed.
- 5:48:49Wealth loves time. Poverty loves
- 5:48:52indecision. I spend more time than I
- 5:48:54deserve with billionaires and
- 5:48:56multi-billionaires. And something I
- 5:48:58noticed is that all of them share
- 5:49:00similar behavior patterns. And there's
- 5:49:0211 that I found. And the best part is
- 5:49:04you can steal just about every single
- 5:49:06one of them. Enjoy. I crossed $100
- 5:49:07million in net worth [music] at age 31.
- 5:49:09I'm 35, significantly higher than that
- 5:49:11now. And I have the privilege of talking
- 5:49:14to lots of people who are at billion
- 5:49:15dollar plus. And [music] so in this
- 5:49:16video, I want to break down a handful of
- 5:49:18themes that I've seen repeated that can
- 5:49:20make you significantly more successful.
- 5:49:22The rich [music] by time, the poor by
- 5:49:24stuff, ambitious people by skills, and
- 5:49:27lazy people by distractions. As much as
- 5:49:30these seem like four different [music]
- 5:49:31groups, it's really like you have these
- 5:49:33pairings. Rich people use money to buy
- 5:49:36time. [music] Ambitious people use time
- 5:49:39to buy skills. And the reason it's
- 5:49:40ambitious people is because generational
- 5:49:42wealth isn't transferred through assets.
- 5:49:45It's not transferred through stuff. It's
- 5:49:47transferred through education. [music]
- 5:49:48It's transferred through skills. And so
- 5:49:50there's this Sanskrit proverb that I
- 5:49:52love. If you have a good son, you don't
- 5:49:54need to accumulate wealth. If you have a
- 5:49:56bad son, there's no point in
- 5:49:58accumulating [music] wealth. And so the
- 5:49:59idea that you're going to pass on your
- 5:50:01wealth to a child who doesn't have the
- 5:50:04skills makes it irrelevant because
- 5:50:06fundamentally either it is a good son
- 5:50:08who has skills and then if the son has
- 5:50:10skills then whether you transfer the
- 5:50:12wealth or not makes the wealth itself
- 5:50:14irrelevant. And I find that there's so
- 5:50:16many things that are like this in wealth
- 5:50:17creation that you don't understand until
- 5:50:19you're on the other side of it because
- 5:50:20the answers that you're looking for are
- 5:50:22not in your newsfeed. They are not in
- 5:50:24the distraction. And so the vast
- 5:50:26majority of lazy people that I have
- 5:50:28encountered continue to distract
- 5:50:30themselves because the difficulty of
- 5:50:33looking at themselves in the mirror and
- 5:50:35saying I am inadequate is too painful.
- 5:50:37And so instead they would rather watch
- 5:50:39fluff videos on the internet that make
- 5:50:42them feel good and tickle their ears
- 5:50:44rather than confront reality that they
- 5:50:47are just not good enough. And so they
- 5:50:48consume the stuff that's like I am
- 5:50:50worthy. I deserve these things. In other
- 5:50:53words, entitled to them, which by the
- 5:50:55way, if you feel entitled to something,
- 5:50:57then when you get it, you are never
- 5:50:58grateful because you thought you
- 5:50:59deserved it to begin with. We know that
- 5:51:01gratitude, for example, is something
- 5:51:02that increases your subjective
- 5:51:04well-being in life, which is that you
- 5:51:05enjoy life more when you are grateful
- 5:51:07for what you get. Which means that you
- 5:51:08have to, by very definition, expect
- 5:51:11nothing, which means you're entitled to
- 5:51:13nothing, which means that you deserve
- 5:51:15nothing. In reality, you are worthy only
- 5:51:17of the things that you currently have
- 5:51:19because you have already gotten them.
- 5:51:20You have proven that you can work a
- 5:51:22minimum wage job, so you are worthy of
- 5:51:24the compensation of minimum wage. And as
- 5:51:26much as this is painful, and I'm sure
- 5:51:27this will get clipped a hundred times to
- 5:51:29show me as some evil rich guy, I'm
- 5:51:30willing to take that hate for the few
- 5:51:32people who will hear this message, and
- 5:51:34decide to change the way they act. You
- 5:51:36can be ambitious and distracted, which
- 5:51:39keeps you poor. When I started out at my
- 5:51:41peak, I had nine businesses because I
- 5:51:44heard seven income streams make you
- 5:51:46wealthy, but it doesn't. Seven income
- 5:51:48streams just spread you seven ways. And
- 5:51:50I had nine. I was like, "Well, seven
- 5:51:51good. Nine must be better." To give you
- 5:51:53context, I had a chiropractor agency. I
- 5:51:55had a dental agency. I had a gym
- 5:51:56turnaround business. And then I had at
- 5:51:58the time six location. So there's nine.
- 5:52:00Where it is? Boom. And I had partners in
- 5:52:02each of these businesses. I was still
- 5:52:04the one who was required to rain,
- 5:52:07meaning I was the one who was required
- 5:52:08to sell customers into all nine. If you
- 5:52:10are required to work inside of the
- 5:52:12business, then you can only really do
- 5:52:14one job. And so when people hear that
- 5:52:16someone has seven income streams, it's
- 5:52:18because they own assets that generate
- 5:52:19that kind of income. But in order to
- 5:52:21gain the cash to then buy the assets
- 5:52:24that create the cash flow, it requires
- 5:52:26time and focus. Let me make focus real
- 5:52:28for you. Focus is a very amorphous term.
- 5:52:30Focus is measured by the amount of
- 5:52:32things you say no to. And inversely, you
- 5:52:35could measure it by how few things you
- 5:52:37say yes to. meaning the most focused
- 5:52:40person says only yes to one thing and
- 5:52:42says no to literally everything else.
- 5:52:44And so the next thing that separates the
- 5:52:46rich from the poor is it's 100x not 2x.
- 5:52:50And so this concept is one that I had
- 5:52:53dinner with a friend of mine who's a
- 5:52:54public CEO and I asked him what he had
- 5:52:57done to grow the business. I think from
- 5:52:58a $200 million market cap to a $1.2
- 5:53:01billion market cap in less than 2
- 5:53:02[music] years. All right. So that's
- 5:53:04absurd growth for a company. And I was
- 5:53:06like, "So, you know, what what are you
- 5:53:07doing primarily?" And he said, "I'm
- 5:53:09shaking hands. I'm kissing babies. I'm
- 5:53:10going to events all the time." And I was
- 5:53:12like, "Well, how many?" He's like,
- 5:53:13"Well, I'm going to do uh 66 events this
- 5:53:15quarter." And I was like, "In person."
- 5:53:17He was like, "Yeah." I was like, "Are
- 5:53:18they coming to you?" And he's like, "No,
- 5:53:19I'm going to them." I want to make this
- 5:53:21real. He has a wife. He has kids. And
- 5:53:24before anyone listens and says, I can't
- 5:53:26believe he Well, cool. He makes trades.
- 5:53:28If anything, I would hope that people
- 5:53:30watch this and say, "I wouldn't make
- 5:53:32that trade." In which case, great. Also,
- 5:53:34don't complain about not having what
- 5:53:35somebody who has made that trade made.
- 5:53:37And so, one of the big misconceptions,
- 5:53:39by the way, this is a sales thing, too,
- 5:53:40is that people want your outcome their
- 5:53:43way. They want to have their cake and
- 5:53:44eat it, too. They want to say, "Hey, I
- 5:53:46want to not change the way I'm eating. I
- 5:53:48want to not change the way I'm living,
- 5:53:49but I want to have a six-pack, and I
- 5:53:50want to be in shape. I want to continue
- 5:53:51to live this way, and I want to get the
- 5:53:5310 chick or the 10 guy. I want to
- 5:53:55continue with my work life schedule as I
- 5:53:58currently have, but I want to have
- 5:53:59hyperrowth." They are trades. They're
- 5:54:01price tags. When you go to the store,
- 5:54:02you either want the shoes and you're
- 5:54:04willing to pay the price or you're not
- 5:54:05willing to pay the price. That's it. You
- 5:54:06can't pick the price for the shoes. You
- 5:54:09pay it or you don't. My telephone back
- 5:54:10to myself is that I thought I worked a
- 5:54:14lot when I was younger. And I did spend
- 5:54:17a lot of time working, but I made so
- 5:54:21little progress because a lot of that
- 5:54:23time I wasn't actually creating output.
- 5:54:26I encourage people to do something
- 5:54:28called the 12x30. All right? It's It's
- 5:54:30very simple and it's actually not as
- 5:54:31unsustainable as people would think. You
- 5:54:33work 12 hours a day for 30 days
- 5:54:34straight, no weekends. By the last day,
- 5:54:36you realize one, you aren't made of
- 5:54:38glass. Two, how much more you could be
- 5:54:41working, [music] three, how much faster
- 5:54:44you could be achieving your goals. Four,
- 5:54:46how much you could be getting better
- 5:54:48every single day. Five, [music] you
- 5:54:50don't need to work like this forever.
- 5:54:52But if you need to do it for a season or
- 5:54:53for a reason sometime in the future,
- 5:54:56you've got that gear in you. And six,
- 5:54:58there are people who are working more
- 5:55:00than you who are beating you. And you
- 5:55:02get all of those lessons for the low
- 5:55:04price of getting more done in a month
- 5:55:05than you probably did last quarter. And
- 5:55:06so everyone and like of course you've
- 5:55:08got one, you know, one side of people
- 5:55:09who are like, I work more than this now.
- 5:55:11And of course they don't. They obviously
- 5:55:12don't. And the thing is is that people
- 5:55:14are like, well, I work like that, but I
- 5:55:15take a couple days off. Right? That's
- 5:55:16the point is that you have to push
- 5:55:18through it. Now, can you work 16 by 30?
- 5:55:20Sure. If you want to, you're welcome to
- 5:55:22work more than that because I've found
- 5:55:23that working six to six is kind of like
- 5:55:24what I do every day anyways. I'm on 12
- 5:55:26by 100, you know, in terms of how I
- 5:55:28think about working. And there's plenty
- 5:55:29of days that I work 15, 16 hour days cuz
- 5:55:31I get here at 5 or 6 and then sometimes
- 5:55:33we have an event, there's a dinner,
- 5:55:34things like that afterwards and ends at
- 5:55:369. And that's where you have to be on,
- 5:55:37not just at the office, not just in
- 5:55:38front of your computer, but people
- 5:55:40actually demanding things of you on a
- 5:55:41regular basis all the time being on
- 5:55:43camera. And I'll tell you that there are
- 5:55:44levels to this. It's like working alone
- 5:55:46for a full day is not as exhausting as
- 5:55:49being on stage for a full day, being on
- 5:55:51camera for a full day because every
- 5:55:53second that you are not peak, you are
- 5:55:56losing. You can take a break while
- 5:55:58you're working alone. You can't take a
- 5:55:59break when you're on stage, when you're
- 5:56:01meeting customers, when you're making
- 5:56:02content like right like every m minute
- 5:56:05that is not recorded is basically a
- 5:56:06minute wasted. There's a whole team here
- 5:56:08behind this camera, right? That is
- 5:56:10making this stuff for you and I'm
- 5:56:11costing them every second I'm not
- 5:56:13showing up. I remember there was a
- 5:56:14period a season of my life where I think
- 5:56:16I had like nine straight uh months of
- 5:56:18this and it was not 12 it was 15 16
- 5:56:21because I had to wake up at 4 to get to
- 5:56:24the gym where I was at the gym but I
- 5:56:26wake up at 4 and then I would get the
- 5:56:27the class ready. I'd open the gym doors
- 5:56:29at 4:30 start the classes at 5:00 and
- 5:56:32the last class at night would end. It
- 5:56:34would be a 7:00 class. It would end at
- 5:56:358:00 and then at 8 I would then do
- 5:56:37billing. I'd reach out to old customers.
- 5:56:39I would confirm lead appointments for
- 5:56:40the next day. all that sometimes until
- 5:56:4210, 11 at night and then I'd wake up
- 5:56:44again at 4:00. And so I don't know what
- 5:56:45the hours are there, but it's more than
- 5:56:4712. And I did that for 9 months
- 5:56:48straight. And I used to describe it as
- 5:56:50the kind of tired a good night's sleep
- 5:56:52couldn't fix. It was like it was tired.
- 5:56:53It was deeper than like a one sleep. I
- 5:56:56needed like weeks to like basically come
- 5:56:58back to normal. And the thing is is that
- 5:57:01I think it is valuable because you have
- 5:57:03to learn that you have that gear. I
- 5:57:05think that that gives you supreme
- 5:57:06confidence when you're entering any new
- 5:57:08endeavor because you know that you have
- 5:57:11acquired the trait of being relentless
- 5:57:13that you do not relent. You do not let
- 5:57:14up. You do not stop until you get what
- 5:57:16you want. And you know that you can push
- 5:57:18through being tired or being underslept
- 5:57:20or being overwhelmed because you realize
- 5:57:22that you didn't die and that you've done
- 5:57:24this before. And so the difference
- 5:57:25between the newbie and the veteran is
- 5:57:27that the veteran looks on something and
- 5:57:28looks back on what they have done to get
- 5:57:31to that point and says, "I've seen this
- 5:57:32before. This is another one of those."
- 5:57:34And that's why they don't have the
- 5:57:35anxiety. That's why they don't have the
- 5:57:37stress. That's so when they get on
- 5:57:38stage, they crush it. That's when they
- 5:57:39the high pressure situation, they still
- 5:57:40breathe normally. Their heartbeat
- 5:57:42doesn't go up because they have done it
- 5:57:43before. And the only way that you can
- 5:57:44get to the point where you can say
- 5:57:45you've done it before is to do it now.
- 5:57:47And so I define work as volume times
- 5:57:51leverage. [music] And so it's about how
- 5:57:52many times you do something and how much
- 5:57:54you get for each time you do it. In the
- 5:57:56beginning, you need to do a lot more of
- 5:57:58this, right? You do way more volume
- 5:58:00because of that volume. you gain skill
- 5:58:02and then the leverage also increases and
- 5:58:04so you get 100x the volume which then
- 5:58:07over time builds skill which then gives
- 5:58:09you more for what you put in and then
- 5:58:11over time that continues to increase
- 5:58:14your output. The thing is this concept
- 5:58:16of 100x not 2x has applied to so many
- 5:58:19different areas of my life. Like when I
- 5:58:20paid a large brand for insight into how
- 5:58:23I could grow my personal brand when I
- 5:58:24decided to get into this game I was like
- 5:58:26hey I'm not growing that fast. Uh, and
- 5:58:28he said, "Oh, well, pull up your social
- 5:58:30media profiles." And we pulled them up
- 5:58:31one by one and he said, "Look at what
- 5:58:32you're doing. Look what I'm doing." And
- 5:58:33he had genuinely been doing 10 times
- 5:58:35more volume than I was doing. And so he
- 5:58:37basically said, "You're not doing enough
- 5:58:39volume." I then said, "Okay, that was
- 5:58:41clear as day. I need to do more volume."
- 5:58:42And the thing is is when we did more
- 5:58:44volume, we got better at doing it. And
- 5:58:46so now we continue to do the same volume
- 5:58:47as I did in the beginning, which is 10
- 5:58:49times more than when I started. We get
- 5:58:50even more output. And then I had a
- 5:58:51different friend who talked to me,
- 5:58:52billionaire guy. He was thinking about
- 5:58:54getting into content. And he said, "Hey,
- 5:58:55I'm really not growing that fast." And I
- 5:58:56had got to have the exact same
- 5:58:58conversation with him. But the thing is
- 5:58:59is that this guy had done 100x not 2x
- 5:59:01before in his life. It was just that he
- 5:59:02got to realize like me that it has been
- 5:59:05100% domain specific. And so when he
- 5:59:07then I showed him my Instagram and his I
- 5:59:09showed him my Tik Tok and his I showed
- 5:59:11him my YouTube and his and I said,
- 5:59:12"Dude, I'm making 450 pieces a week.
- 5:59:14You're making seven." And he was like,
- 5:59:15"Got it." Like understood. He
- 5:59:16immediately got it because he had
- 5:59:18already learned that lesson in a
- 5:59:19different domain. I want to I want to
- 5:59:20zoom out for a second. Right now is a
- 5:59:23period of time where I'm working really
- 5:59:25hard. I'm working a lot. I'll give you
- 5:59:27context as to what a lot is for me. So
- 5:59:29this year, the first hundred days of the
- 5:59:31year, I didn't have a day off. And so my
- 5:59:35time was only spent working. And so it's
- 5:59:38like, well, what's the difference
- 5:59:39between when you were quote working all
- 5:59:41the time when you're younger and working
- 5:59:42all the time now is that what I get done
- 5:59:44in a day is significantly greater than
- 5:59:46what I got done. And the quality of that
- 5:59:48work is also higher. Because the thing
- 5:59:50is is that you learn how to work. You
- 5:59:51get better at working the more you do
- 5:59:53it. And so a lot of people are like,
- 5:59:54"Man, I I feel like I'm not that
- 5:59:55productive when I work. Like, what
- 5:59:56should I do?" It's like, "Work more."
- 5:59:57Like, you work more until you get better
- 5:59:59at working. I remember when I was a
- 6:00:00legal intern at a at a company in France
- 6:00:02called Archma, Ama, if you want to how
- 6:00:05they say it. And I was a legal intern,
- 6:00:06and I was spending the whole summer
- 6:00:08there, which by the way, they always try
- 6:00:09and like use and abuse interns. I was
- 6:00:10like, "Man, I'm I'm working so hard."
- 6:00:12And I talked to one of these legal
- 6:00:13partners. And I only had one exchange
- 6:00:15with this particular legal partner
- 6:00:16who's, you know, high up in the firm.
- 6:00:17And she said, "Oh." She was like,
- 6:00:19"That's cute. You don't even know what
- 6:00:21work is." She said, "You don't even know
- 6:00:22how to work." She's like, "You spend
- 6:00:23time here." She's like, "But you don't
- 6:00:25know how to work." I just remember how
- 6:00:27dismissive uh what she said was. But I I
- 6:00:30understood I mean I understand now
- 6:00:31especially what she meant was like,
- 6:00:32"You're spending a lot of time here, but
- 6:00:34you're not getting anything done." And
- 6:00:35it takes time. It takes reps to get
- 6:00:37better at working itself. And so that
- 6:00:39measure of focus, the equal opposite of
- 6:00:41distraction is just how long you can
- 6:00:42stick with it. And I can tell you that
- 6:00:44me from a very visceral perspective when
- 6:00:45I work, there are many times like you
- 6:00:47know when you work and you're like,
- 6:00:48"Man, I feel like I I like need a
- 6:00:50break." The thing is just that that
- 6:00:51break period for people who aren't as
- 6:00:53good at working might be like the rest
- 6:00:55of the day. And the better and better
- 6:00:56that I've gotten at working is that I
- 6:00:58can like kind of like whip my like whip
- 6:01:00my head back in and be like confront
- 6:01:02like keep going. And I'm like all right
- 6:01:05I'm going to keep going. And then you
- 6:01:06kind of realize that there's like a 5
- 6:01:08minute sometimes 15 minute period where
- 6:01:10like your output slows a little bit but
- 6:01:12then you catch the next draft and then
- 6:01:13you're in again. It's being able to whip
- 6:01:15yourself back in. And that muscle of
- 6:01:18doing that takes practice. And the only
- 6:01:20opportunity that you get to flex that
- 6:01:22muscle, to practice it, is to work
- 6:01:24yourself to the point of fatigue, to the
- 6:01:27point where distraction or respite or
- 6:01:29rest would be beneficial or you feel
- 6:01:32like it's what you crave right now. And
- 6:01:34then being able to be like, "No, I can
- 6:01:35power through this." And the thing is is
- 6:01:37you can you can power through it. It
- 6:01:39just takes practice. And practice takes
- 6:01:41repetition and being willing to be
- 6:01:42uncomfortable for an extended period of
- 6:01:44time. And it's kind of like when you're
- 6:01:45eating and you're dieting, there are
- 6:01:47moments where you get these cravings
- 6:01:48where you're like, "Man, I'm starving. I
- 6:01:49want something sweet." If you've ever
- 6:01:50dieted before, and this is where
- 6:01:52repetitions help, it only lasts like 20
- 6:01:54minutes. So, if you ever do this, by the
- 6:01:55way, dieting hack is just set a timer
- 6:01:57when you're like, "Man, I really want
- 6:01:58something." Wait 20. And if you still
- 6:02:00want it, which you rarely do because it
- 6:02:01usually lasts less than 20, sometimes
- 6:02:03just five. It'll just go away. And the
- 6:02:05same thing happens with focus, but we
- 6:02:07then just take off. We take off for our
- 6:02:09diet for the day. we order a pizza,
- 6:02:10right? We order ice cream, right? Or we
- 6:02:12take off working for the day, right? And
- 6:02:14we just say, "I'm just going to watch
- 6:02:15Netflix for the rest of the time, or I'm
- 6:02:17just going to go hang out with friends,
- 6:02:18whatever, or I'm going to go out." But I
- 6:02:21will say now that I have worked for a
- 6:02:23100 days straight, and that was in the
- 6:02:26earlier part of this year. I think this
- 6:02:27year I've probably taken three or four
- 6:02:31days off since the year started. And I
- 6:02:33still probably worked until like two on
- 6:02:35those days, but I still consider those
- 6:02:36like more or less days off. You're not
- 6:02:38going to die. And so I think back
- 6:02:40retroactively or like historically like
- 6:02:42there were people who were forced to
- 6:02:44work for years on end or they would get
- 6:02:46killed. As gruesome as that may seem, I
- 6:02:48see that as hopeful in that they have
- 6:02:51already demonstrated that it's possible.
- 6:02:53Like you can work continuously for an
- 6:02:55extended period of time because
- 6:02:55fundamentally you're just alive, you're
- 6:02:57moving, right? And like you think super
- 6:02:59ancestors, it's like they didn't have
- 6:03:00computers. They like they just were
- 6:03:02around. And so you do keep busy while
- 6:03:04you're awake. And so you might as well
- 6:03:06keep busy continuing to nudge things
- 6:03:08forward. And I can't tell you the amount
- 6:03:09of times where now I'm like my mind
- 6:03:11checked out and I was like, I my brain
- 6:03:13checked out a little bit, but I'm going
- 6:03:14to I'm just going to keep I'm going to
- 6:03:16keep going. And then 3 hours, 4 hours, 6
- 6:03:18hours more passed and I'm like, oh, I
- 6:03:20actually finished everything that I said
- 6:03:22I was going to do. And it's just so much
- 6:03:25more work and it's fewer days off and
- 6:03:27it's earlier mornings and longer nights.
- 6:03:29And it it it just it's being able to do
- 6:03:31that for an extended period of time. I
- 6:03:33know the whole idea of like, you know,
- 6:03:34work on the things you love and you'll
- 6:03:35never work another day in your life.
- 6:03:36That's just I just don't think it's
- 6:03:38true. Like there's the so many things
- 6:03:39that I don't enjoy doing that I have to
- 6:03:41do. And that's why at least for me, my
- 6:03:43saying is always um I will do what is
- 6:03:44required. How I feel about it is
- 6:03:46relatively irrelevant because the things
- 6:03:48that have come from doing what is
- 6:03:51required have made doing the
- 6:03:53requirements something that I know will
- 6:03:55pay off. And so I kind of like feast on
- 6:03:57those morsels of past achievements as
- 6:03:59the fuel to continue doing things that
- 6:04:01may be uncomfortable or unpleasant in
- 6:04:03the moment. And most work isn't
- 6:04:05unpleasant. It's just work. It's like I
- 6:04:07have to get this done right now. Like I
- 6:04:09get to get this done. Sure. But like I'm
- 6:04:12just being real for me. It's it's it's
- 6:04:15usually not sunshine and rainbows. Like
- 6:04:16I I work a lot and I I get and I'm
- 6:04:18tired, you know? I I um I slept 9 hours
- 6:04:21last night which was the first time I've
- 6:04:22slept 9 hours in a while and I feel
- 6:04:24amazing right now. But sometimes you got
- 6:04:25to work on six. Sometimes you got to
- 6:04:27work on five. And so think about this
- 6:04:28hypothetical extreme. Let's say that you
- 6:04:30played video games. That was all you
- 6:04:32did. When I say that's all you did, you
- 6:04:33didn't go out. You didn't talk to
- 6:04:34people. You didn't see anyone. You
- 6:04:36didn't eat. You didn't sleep. But you
- 6:04:38would be incredibly focused. Now, at
- 6:04:40that point, you say, "Well, in order for
- 6:04:42him to play more video games, he needs
- 6:04:43to sleep." So there are contingencies,
- 6:04:45right? You do need to eat or you'll die.
- 6:04:47And so there are the fewest requirements
- 6:04:49necessary to maintain consistent focus
- 6:04:52on the one thing. And those thing become
- 6:04:54requisites for focus rather than
- 6:04:57distraction. Like there are periods of
- 6:04:59time where you will need to rest. That
- 6:05:01rest therefore is productive because it
- 6:05:03increases your total output in the one
- 6:05:05thing that gets you the most leverage
- 6:05:07that gets you closest to your goals in
- 6:05:09the shortest period of time. And so this
- 6:05:11isn't a video of me saying, you know,
- 6:05:13work until you die. Well, you will work
- 6:05:14until you die because we all will die
- 6:05:16and we all probably will work at some
- 6:05:17point. But it is more video of saying
- 6:05:20that every single thing that is not a
- 6:05:22requisite for you continuing to do the
- 6:05:25one thing that one yes are all
- 6:05:27distractions. They are all things that
- 6:05:29take away. And people have a hard time
- 6:05:32with this because they like to say like
- 6:05:33you need to have balance. But this is
- 6:05:35what poor people do not understand. And
- 6:05:38I am going to do my very best to kind of
- 6:05:40like pass down a message from the future
- 6:05:42to my past self about this. And this
- 6:05:44goes for entrepreneurs specifically,
- 6:05:45which is you do not understand how much
- 6:05:48work it is. Like you think you
- 6:05:49understand how much work it is. And I've
- 6:05:51had multiple times in my life where I've
- 6:05:54met someone who was way further ahead
- 6:05:56than me and I saw them actually working
- 6:05:585 to 10 times more than me. And I was
- 6:06:00like, "Wow." And there's this scene in
- 6:06:01Invictus, which is a movie with Morgan
- 6:06:04Freeman and Matt Damon. I love this
- 6:06:06moment. There's an exchange. I'm
- 6:06:07paraphrasing, but he says something to
- 6:06:09the extent of, "I've heard that you've
- 6:06:10been uh playing with an injury." And
- 6:06:12Matt [music] Damon just kind of says,
- 6:06:13"Well, no one ever plays at 100%." And I
- 6:06:16just love that because to me that kind
- 6:06:18of encompasses the champion mindset,
- 6:06:20which is that it's not about playing
- 6:06:23when circumstances are perfect. It's
- 6:06:25that playing creates perfect
- 6:06:26circumstances. [music]
- 6:06:27We have to learn to play when the chips
- 6:06:30are stacked against us. It's like having
- 6:06:33values. Values are only valuable when
- 6:06:35they are tested. You can say you're
- 6:06:37loyal, but if you know a girl, if you're
- 6:06:39in a hotel room and a girl is there and
- 6:06:41your wife isn't there and there's no way
- 6:06:42that she finds out, that is the test of
- 6:06:45whether you're loyal. It's when there's
- 6:06:46stakes. Test of whether you have work
- 6:06:48ethic is whether you can work when
- 6:06:49you're tired. It's whether you can work
- 6:06:50when you're distracted. It's whether you
- 6:06:52can work on things that you don't find
- 6:06:53pleasant. Because all of the and I see
- 6:06:55this with, you know, some of the young
- 6:06:56guys, like there was a guy we hired and
- 6:06:58then in three days he said, "I don't
- 6:06:59think this is for me." And he got hired
- 6:07:00to a sales role and he was he was making
- 6:07:01outbound calls. I was like, "You don't
- 6:07:03think this is for you?" I was like, you
- 6:07:04don't even know what's for you. You were
- 6:07:06here for 3 days. You didn't even get the
- 6:07:08ability to get good at the basic thing.
- 6:07:10And so, there's a level of intolerance
- 6:07:12for discomfort in some sort of
- 6:07:15expectation that it's going to be this
- 6:07:17amazing thing that you're going to love
- 6:07:18at all times. And it's just not. And so,
- 6:07:21I would I'm okay being a different voice
- 6:07:23in the in the entrepreneur space that's
- 6:07:25not like, you know, passion is what is
- 6:07:27what gets you through the the hard
- 6:07:28times. I don't think so. Passion has not
- 6:07:31been the thing that has gotten me
- 6:07:32through my my harder times. It has been
- 6:07:34desire. It has been wanting to make
- 6:07:37something into a reality by dragging
- 6:07:40something from your mind into the world.
- 6:07:43And sometimes I feel like you're giving
- 6:07:44birth to this thing, which for every
- 6:07:46mother, which I obviously haven't given
- 6:07:48birth, it's like you give birth kicking
- 6:07:49and screaming. It's a painful
- 6:07:50experience, but then there's life that
- 6:07:52happens afterwards. And I see work as
- 6:07:55very much labor. And we even use the
- 6:07:57same word. It's labor. It's work. It's
- 6:08:00It's painful. The pain is that like
- 6:08:02you're halfway through, I would imagine,
- 6:08:04and you're like, I still have to keep
- 6:08:06pushing because it's still not alive
- 6:08:07yet. It's still not out. And so, I think
- 6:08:09learning to push through that, and this
- 6:08:11is the part that my friend was saying
- 6:08:13where he's like, they don't get it. They
- 6:08:14don't get it. They think that I do one
- 6:08:16of these speaking events and they see my
- 6:08:17Instagram and they think, "Oh, okay.
- 6:08:19Well, why is my brain not growing like
- 6:08:20that?" He's like, "Well, I was in five
- 6:08:22different cities this week and I just
- 6:08:24had to do FaceTime with my kids in order
- 6:08:27for them to see me." And people are then
- 6:08:29like, "I wouldn't make that trade."
- 6:08:31Fine, but don't want what he has. And
- 6:08:33so, let me let me draw this out for you
- 6:08:35in a nice little visual to show you how
- 6:08:38I see work, right? This volume that you
- 6:08:40need to do. So, you have excitement,
- 6:08:44right? So when you have this new idea,
- 6:08:46which we have them, and you're like, "Oh
- 6:08:48my god, this is amazing, right? This is
- 6:08:51so good." The thing is is that once you
- 6:08:54become neutral and then you become
- 6:08:57worried and stressed, this is when work
- 6:09:00begins. And so in the bodybuilding
- 6:09:02world, they'd be like, "Okay, once you
- 6:09:03have achieved failure, that is where
- 6:09:05your working reps begin." It's an old
- 6:09:07school bodybuilding thing. I'm sure the
- 6:09:08science bros will be upset about it, but
- 6:09:10I think that it very much qualifies for
- 6:09:12how it relates to work in this world is
- 6:09:15is that your motivation fades very
- 6:09:17quickly. It's that work begins once
- 6:09:19motivation stops. And I think if you
- 6:09:21measure it that way, then you will
- 6:09:22measure how much you work and how hard
- 6:09:24you work very differently. So, it
- 6:09:25reminds me this Muhammad Ali quote where
- 6:09:27he says, "I hated every minute of
- 6:09:28training, but I would tell myself,
- 6:09:30suffer now and live the rest of your
- 6:09:31life as a champion." I have this uh
- 6:09:34tweet that I said a minute ago that I
- 6:09:35really like. And so whenever I get to a
- 6:09:38low point where I think why do I even
- 6:09:39bother? I just try and remind myself
- 6:09:41this is where most people stop and this
- 6:09:42is why they don't win. That period that
- 6:09:44wall that you hit like that is that is
- 6:09:47the champion wall. That is where you you
- 6:09:49leave everyone else behind because
- 6:09:50everyone only works until their point of
- 6:09:51excitement and then they stop. It's like
- 6:09:53you have to find that next gear. So the
- 6:09:55next point is that they cannot copy
- 6:10:01your proof. People want to gain
- 6:10:03reputations. They want to be known for
- 6:10:05certain things. They want to get status.
- 6:10:07[music]
- 6:10:07But people can copy your promises. They
- 6:10:11can copy your services. They can copy
- 6:10:13your logo. They can copy your name, but
- 6:10:15they can't copy what you've done. I have
- 6:10:17sometimes younger entrepreneurs who
- 6:10:19reach out and they're like, hey, I want
- 6:10:20to build a big brand. And um they're
- 6:10:22like, I want to start making content.
- 6:10:23But I advise them to only make content
- 6:10:26if they're truly documenting and don't
- 6:10:28transition into teacher mode. Because
- 6:10:30the thing that will build your brand is
- 6:10:31the stuff you do. Like we look at the
- 6:10:33business titans that are out there,
- 6:10:34right? You look at Elon, you look at
- 6:10:36Bezos, you look at maybe now Sam Alman,
- 6:10:38you look at Jensen Hang from Nvidia and
- 6:10:40they now have these quote big business
- 6:10:43brands. Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Warren
- 6:10:45Buffett, they are considered probably
- 6:10:46the leaders of the business world in
- 6:10:48terms of thought leadership. But did
- 6:10:50they get there by building personal
- 6:10:53brands? Or did they get there by
- 6:10:55building personal businesses and then by
- 6:10:57building personal businesses, which I'm
- 6:10:59joking here. They just built big ass
- 6:11:00businesses. By extension, people wanted
- 6:11:03to know who was the person behind this
- 6:11:05big business. And then they built their
- 6:11:07credibility before they built their
- 6:11:09likability. Everyone wants to put the
- 6:11:11car before the horse. Everyone wants to
- 6:11:12put the uh they want to eat the pudding
- 6:11:14before they have the proof. The proof
- 6:11:15comes before the pudding in the real
- 6:11:16world. In a world where anyone can say
- 6:11:18anything and get instant reach, trust is
- 6:11:20the thing that is the scarcity. That is
- 6:11:22the that is the rare commodity. And so
- 6:11:26the idea is if you want to build a
- 6:11:27really big brand, then you want to index
- 6:11:29super hard on trust. And the way that
- 6:11:30people can trust you is that you do what
- 6:11:32you said you have done. The reason Mr.
- 6:11:34Beast videos worked is because he used
- 6:11:37his videos as proof. He didn't say, "I
- 6:11:39am super knowledgeable." He said, "Look,
- 6:11:40I did something that no one else is
- 6:11:42willing to do." His first video that
- 6:11:43went viral was him counting to a million
- 6:11:44or something crazy, right? And so he did
- 6:11:47something that other people were not
- 6:11:48willing to do. And so he just happened
- 6:11:49to have documented that thing. And so if
- 6:11:51you're like, well, how do I get proof?
- 6:11:53I'm so young. It's like, well, you just
- 6:11:54do epic stuff. And then people will be
- 6:11:56like, wow, he did epic stuff. This is
- 6:11:59interesting. And so it still requires
- 6:12:01epic amounts of work in order to do
- 6:12:03that. The reason that there's such a
- 6:12:04misconception about overnight success is
- 6:12:06that it's just that there's a threshold
- 6:12:08over which you are good enough that you
- 6:12:10go viral. All right? And so this is call
- 6:12:13it like here is the viral you know viral
- 6:12:15moment. All right. So this is our viral
- 6:12:17moment right here. The thing is is that
- 6:12:19we the person lived this whole life.
- 6:12:21What we in the public see is this moment
- 6:12:23what happened since. And so we have the
- 6:12:26perception of overnight success. And
- 6:12:28this is why it's so difficult for people
- 6:12:29to wrap their heads around because they
- 6:12:30want to model what they see not what
- 6:12:32occurred. And so we have to model what
- 6:12:34they did not what happened. And so this
- 6:12:37fundamentally is the inputs. This is
- 6:12:38what they put in for a long period of
- 6:12:40time. What we see here is the output.
- 6:12:43This is what's visible. And so this is
- 6:12:45where it gets especially difficult for
- 6:12:47people trying to learn is that most
- 6:12:48people get rich and then they get weird.
- 6:12:50And then what happens is people then try
- 6:12:52and copy what they do here,
- 6:12:55not what they did to get there. And so
- 6:12:57they copy the wrong stuff. They model
- 6:12:58the plateau, not the rise. So you don't
- 6:13:00get rich by flying on private jets. You
- 6:13:02get rich then you can fly on private
- 6:13:04jets. And so a big thing that richer
- 6:13:07people do is that they will act with
- 6:13:08urgency. And I would say this is just
- 6:13:10not even richer people. This is
- 6:13:11entrepreneurs specifically that I'm
- 6:13:13making this video for is that they act
- 6:13:14with urgency. All right? And so you can
- 6:13:17tell in some ways how how successful
- 6:13:19someone's going to be by how quickly
- 6:13:20they do things. The gap between thoughts
- 6:13:23and action. And so this is something I
- 6:13:24personally work on a lot which is like
- 6:13:26how quickly between when I make a
- 6:13:27decision to do something does it
- 6:13:29actually occur. And you can improve your
- 6:13:31potency as a person, how powerful you
- 6:13:33are by decreasing the gap between
- 6:13:35thoughts and action. Like if you think
- 6:13:36about the hypothetical extreme of this,
- 6:13:38the god figure if you will, thoughts and
- 6:13:40reality are one and the same. He thinks
- 6:13:42planets and universes and they appear.
- 6:13:44And so that would be the ultimate
- 6:13:45demonstration of power in my opinion.
- 6:13:47And so we can approximate that. We can
- 6:13:49get as close to that as we can by
- 6:13:51shrinking the time it takes between when
- 6:13:53we think and when we decide and then
- 6:13:55when we ultimately do. When you don't
- 6:13:57have any more information to collect in
- 6:13:58order to make a decision, then you make
- 6:14:00the decision. And you make the decision
- 6:14:02by eliminating alternatives. So like
- 6:14:05literally the word decide comes from
- 6:14:06decadere which is Latin for to cut off.
- 6:14:08And so the question is what thing are
- 6:14:10you eliminating by making the decision
- 6:14:12that you're going to make. And a really
- 6:14:13easy tactical thing is is whenever you
- 6:14:15say I'm going to get this done by the
- 6:14:16end of the week ask yourself can I get
- 6:14:17it done by the end of the day? And that
- 6:14:19seems like a very small hack but that
- 6:14:21increases your pace of progress by 7x.
- 6:14:23And so if you hear that you're like wow
- 6:14:257x it's like yeah and for that reason
- 6:14:27there are people who are working 100
- 6:14:28times faster than you. And I think that
- 6:14:30this is a really good cultural thing
- 6:14:31which is uh you can just say end of day
- 6:14:35not
- 6:14:37end of week and not end of month end of
- 6:14:41week. So in each of the instances this
- 6:14:43is a 4x increase this is a 7x increase
- 6:14:46right and you can even go end of day
- 6:14:48goes into end of hour. Now this is one
- 6:14:51that I talks about a lot and she's a
- 6:14:52master operator is that she heard this
- 6:14:56from a mentor. She said, "If it's a five
- 6:14:58minute task and you have 5 minutes, do
- 6:15:00it now." And so the amount of times
- 6:15:01where I'm like, "Hey, we should do this
- 6:15:02thing." And then literally in 60 seconds
- 6:15:04it's handled by Ila, like while I'm just
- 6:15:07walking around talking just like
- 6:15:08shooting ideas out there is baffling.
- 6:15:11And so her speed of like that's a great
- 6:15:14idea, it's already been, you know,
- 6:15:16delegated out. Like she doesn't keep
- 6:15:17things on her plate. And so there's this
- 6:15:19big falseness that I think is propagated
- 6:15:22by a lot of the social media world
- 6:15:24because it feels good and to get lots of
- 6:15:26shares because it gives people
- 6:15:27permission to be lazy. It gives people
- 6:15:30permission to tell themselves that
- 6:15:31they're great just the way they are. I
- 6:15:33wholeheartedly reject that entire
- 6:15:35notion. The idea that they sell you is
- 6:15:37that you're young. You've got time. And
- 6:15:39I think that is false because all this
- 6:15:42does is extend how long it takes you to
- 6:15:46remember that number one, tomorrow isn't
- 6:15:48guaranteed. Like I just looked at my
- 6:15:50newsfeed this morning and I there was a
- 6:15:51guy that I knew who's my age and he just
- 6:15:53died of stomach cancer. Really sad.
- 6:15:55Really nice guy. Wife and three kids
- 6:15:56into fitness, really in shape. Just a
- 6:15:59freak thing that happened. And so the
- 6:16:01assumption that you've got time assumes
- 6:16:03that you know you're going to live
- 6:16:05forever, that you know you're going to
- 6:16:06live to 100. And we know that that's not
- 6:16:07true. And let me put this in
- 6:16:08perspective. Three out of 10,000 people
- 6:16:12live to 100. And so everyone has this
- 6:16:14assumption in their mind that they're
- 6:16:15like, "Yeah, I'm at 50, so I'm going to
- 6:16:17make it to 100." Yeah. Well, you've got
- 6:16:18a 3 in 10,000 shot at doing that. Very
- 6:16:21unlikely. More realistically, you'll die
- 6:16:24at the median, which is 74 for men in
- 6:16:26the US, which means that at 37, you're
- 6:16:28actually at the halfway point, just in
- 6:16:30years. But if you adjust for the
- 6:16:32increase in speed of time. So the same
- 6:16:34reason that your kid at 5 years old
- 6:16:36thinks that something takes forever when
- 6:16:37you say it's going to happen next year
- 6:16:38and when you're 40 something that
- 6:16:40happens next year feels like you blink
- 6:16:42your eyes and it's there is that when
- 6:16:43you're five one year is 20% of your
- 6:16:45life. When you're 40 one year is 2 and a
- 6:16:48half% of your life. And so it very much
- 6:16:50in real way is nine times faster than it
- 6:16:52is for your 5-year-old. And so it's my
- 6:16:54belief that as we get older we don't
- 6:16:56become more patient. Time just moves
- 6:16:58faster. And so if you adjust for that
- 6:17:01time speed, your midpoint isn't 37. It's
- 6:17:04closer to 21. And so this is also why in
- 6:17:06my opinion when you think back on your
- 6:17:08life, you have so much meat in the first
- 6:17:0920 years. So much stuff happens, all
- 6:17:11these material life events. And it's
- 6:17:13because in that time period, it was half
- 6:17:14of your life. And then after that,
- 6:17:17everything happens real fast. And so
- 6:17:19what you have to realize is one,
- 6:17:20tomorrow isn't guaranteed. Two, nothing
- 6:17:22is going to be easy. Just get over it.
- 6:17:24Every time you think, oh, this could
- 6:17:26look just get immediately skip to it.
- 6:17:27Oh, that's not true. there's something I
- 6:17:29don't know about that. Just skip to it.
- 6:17:30The faster you can train that muscle
- 6:17:32that as soon as you have this FOMO, just
- 6:17:35slow down and realize that you don't
- 6:17:36know enough. Three, it takes time to get
- 6:17:38good. There's no one who's good at
- 6:17:40anything that was immediately good at
- 6:17:41it. And the people who are immediately
- 6:17:43good at it, I remember telling a
- 6:17:44professor, I was like, you know, I've
- 6:17:45just naturally been good at languages.
- 6:17:46He was like, when you were a kid, did
- 6:17:47you have multiple languages in your
- 6:17:48household? I was like, well, yeah, I'm
- 6:17:50bilingual. And he's like, what are you
- 6:17:52even talking about? Like, you literally
- 6:17:53started with that. So, of course,
- 6:17:55languages are easier for you. And so the
- 6:17:57thing is is that the people who have
- 6:17:58things that come naturally to them, they
- 6:18:00just only came because they forgot the
- 6:18:01work that generalized to the new skill.
- 6:18:04Once you realize that it takes time and
- 6:18:05repetitions to get good, then you also
- 6:18:07realize that the sooner you start, the
- 6:18:09sooner you get. And don't stop until you
- 6:18:12do. So let's assume you act with
- 6:18:14urgency, right? You've gotten that done.
- 6:18:16You've moved end of week to end of day.
- 6:18:17You've moved end of day to end of this
- 6:18:18hour. You moved end of month to end of
- 6:18:20this week. And you've massively
- 6:18:21increased the speed that you execute.
- 6:18:22Well, then you start running face
- 6:18:25forward into the fact that things are
- 6:18:26going to get really hard really fast.
- 6:18:28And so I will I will tell you this one
- 6:18:30is that hard is for now, not forever.
- 6:18:32And so the good thing about bad times is
- 6:18:35that they end. And the bad thing about
- 6:18:37good times is that they also end. And so
- 6:18:39whenever you're going through a good
- 6:18:40season, it's also a good reminder that
- 6:18:42this too shall pass. And so what ends up
- 6:18:44happening is that when you're in the
- 6:18:46hard time, that can give you that
- 6:18:47necessary respite. It can give you the
- 6:18:49end of the the tunnel that you can look
- 6:18:50forward to. There's only three outcomes.
- 6:18:52You either quit, it gets easier, or you
- 6:18:54get harder. So, think about that because
- 6:18:56no matter what, it always ends, but you
- 6:18:59only lose when you quit before you see
- 6:19:01it through. Because two out of the three
- 6:19:03outcomes get easier. Either it relents,
- 6:19:05the outside circumstance gets easier,
- 6:19:07like the hard thing moves, or you become
- 6:19:09harder and then by extension, it no
- 6:19:11longer feels hard for you, which I'll
- 6:19:13make this real for you right now. Think
- 6:19:15about the problems that you were
- 6:19:16stressed about 5 years ago in your
- 6:19:18business, right? Think about the things
- 6:19:20that you were dealing with, what you
- 6:19:21were stressed about. Now, think about
- 6:19:23you trying to solve those problems
- 6:19:24today. It's probably a joke to you now.
- 6:19:26You'd be like, "Well, yeah, obviously."
- 6:19:27It's not that those things became less
- 6:19:29hard, you became better. But here's
- 6:19:31where this gets really interesting for
- 6:19:32me. It just means that nothing is
- 6:19:34inherently hard to begin with anyways.
- 6:19:36We are just always inadequate. For me, I
- 6:19:38remember when I had five employees and I
- 6:19:40was like, "Man, it's so many people to
- 6:19:41manage." Or, you know, I was like,
- 6:19:42"Where am I going to, you know, I have
- 6:19:44to manage cash flow. How do I do that?"
- 6:19:45Or like, "How am I going to get new
- 6:19:46customers? like how do I how do I I
- 6:19:48can't sell really expensive stuff. Like
- 6:19:50what if someone gets upset, you know, if
- 6:19:51I if I charge more, right? What if what
- 6:19:53if someone finds out I charged this
- 6:19:55much? As though it's like something
- 6:19:56wrong. Like all of these things are just
- 6:19:59just irrelevant to me now. Just so
- 6:20:01silly. Though for me at the time, they
- 6:20:03were difficult. And I can only imagine
- 6:20:05how inconsequential the problems that I
- 6:20:07deal with growing hopefully three
- 6:20:10billion dollar companies right now
- 6:20:11within the portfolio compared to what
- 6:20:12Elon deals with having six multiple
- 6:20:15hundred billion dollar companies and I I
- 6:20:18compare myself to that so I can always
- 6:20:20feel like I have a long way to go. If
- 6:20:23you are a business owner and you're
- 6:20:26making you know you've got a legitimate
- 6:20:27business, you've got employees, revenue,
- 6:20:29profit, etc. and you'd like to see how
- 6:20:32we grow companies. Uh, every month at
- 6:20:35acquisition.com in person at my
- 6:20:37headquarters, we hold basically two-day
- 6:20:40workshops where my team, my actual, you
- 6:20:42know, director of marketing, director of
- 6:20:44sales, director of media, all of all of
- 6:20:46my team basically works with businesses
- 6:20:48to just help them grow. And it's a cool
- 6:20:51way for us to meet new companies that
- 6:20:53kind of builds our pipeline on the
- 6:20:54investment side, but it also just
- 6:20:55provides value to you guys. And so, it's
- 6:20:57kind of a cool win-win. You know, the
- 6:20:59reviews are exceptional. So the link is
- 6:21:01ACQ ACQ the letters.com
- 6:21:04vegas. You can go there and you grab a
- 6:21:07time with my team. They'll just ask you
- 6:21:08a couple questions, make sure the
- 6:21:09business makes sense that we can help
- 6:21:10you out. And if so, then we'll invite
- 6:21:11you out here to Vegas and have a have a
- 6:21:13party. Not really. It'll just be almost
- 6:21:15all entirely business. And I would
- 6:21:17encourage you not to party at least till
- 6:21:18afterwards. Uh but beyond that, let's
- 6:21:20get back to it. But let me give you one
- 6:21:22thing that that'll also give you a
- 6:21:23little bit of hope about these these
- 6:21:24hard times is that these hard times are
- 6:21:28also
- 6:21:32your best times
- 6:21:35but only in reverse. And so let me
- 6:21:38explain what I mean by that. Think about
- 6:21:39the times when you were younger and you
- 6:21:41were in love and you were poor and
- 6:21:42you're like man those were the good old
- 6:21:44days. The thing is is that when you were
- 6:21:45in that moment it was stressful. You
- 6:21:46didn't know how you're going to make
- 6:21:47ends meet, how you're going to make
- 6:21:48rent, where you're going to get food,
- 6:21:49whatever it is. You have these these
- 6:21:51hard times, the hard times that you go
- 6:21:53through today, but these hard times
- 6:21:55become the good old days. And so, we
- 6:21:56only see the truth when we look back.
- 6:21:59You have to go through them to get the
- 6:22:01perspective. And it's something that I
- 6:22:02try and like remember on a regular basis
- 6:22:04that like I'm going through the good old
- 6:22:06days. And if they're the good old days
- 6:22:07in the future, they might as well be the
- 6:22:08good old days today. So, let me tell you
- 6:22:12a little bit about what it feels like
- 6:22:14throughout this entire process. Because
- 6:22:16if you were consistently growing, you
- 6:22:17were consistently in pain. That's why
- 6:22:19they're called growing pains, not
- 6:22:22growing joys. And if you have stress
- 6:22:26from growth, remember the alternative is
- 6:22:28that you can have stress from stagnation
- 6:22:30and you can have stress from decline,
- 6:22:32which fundamentally means that hardness
- 6:22:34and stress is a fact of life. You will
- 6:22:37always have stress, you will always have
- 6:22:38problems. And the largest problem of
- 6:22:40all, the largest stressor of all is
- 6:22:42determining that having problems is a
- 6:22:44problem. Is that being stressed means
- 6:22:46there's something wrong with you. But
- 6:22:48being stressed just means you're alive.
- 6:22:50Having problems just means that you are
- 6:22:52actually doing something. I'll tell you
- 6:22:53this story that I think can drive this
- 6:22:55home. And I think this is the path to
- 6:22:57fulfillment over comfort.
- 6:23:01So imagine you talk to the creator of
- 6:23:03the universe before birth and pick the
- 6:23:05person you get to become. You say, "I
- 6:23:07want to be the most courageous." The
- 6:23:09creator replies and says, "Well then I
- 6:23:11will give you monsters to terrify you so
- 6:23:12that you can conquer them." Then you
- 6:23:13say, "Well, I want to be patient." And
- 6:23:14the creator replies, "Well, then I will
- 6:23:16make you work harder and longer so you
- 6:23:17can learn to wait." So then you say, "I
- 6:23:19want to be wise." Then the creator
- 6:23:20replies, "Then I will give you failures
- 6:23:22that will crush your spirit so you can
- 6:23:23learn the value of judgment." You then
- 6:23:25say, "Sounds like a rough life. Can you
- 6:23:27give me a good life?" Creator replies,
- 6:23:29"Just like we measure the quality of a
- 6:23:30blacksmith by the strength of his steel.
- 6:23:32I measure you by what you are at the
- 6:23:34end, not the fire and the hammer it took
- 6:23:36to make you." A good life isn't a life
- 6:23:38that's easy. A good life is a life that
- 6:23:40makes you into a good person. And that,
- 6:23:42my son, is a hard life. And so I
- 6:23:44remember when I when I sold Gym Launch,
- 6:23:46there was a year that I more or less
- 6:23:47took off. I had all these kind of
- 6:23:49existential crises that I was going
- 6:23:51through because all I had been doing is
- 6:23:52just working and working, working. Then
- 6:23:54I hadn't like put my head up to like
- 6:23:55look around and and smell the roses, per
- 6:23:57se. The problem that I had was that when
- 6:23:59I was smelling the roses, I was
- 6:24:00miserable. I was very sad. And the the
- 6:24:02sadness for me came from the thing that
- 6:24:04I had that was most reinforcing my life
- 6:24:05was the work that I was doing. That was
- 6:24:07the thing that was that I enjoyed the
- 6:24:08most. And so not having that actually
- 6:24:10created a huge loss for me. And so then
- 6:24:12I had to create like what am I doing
- 6:24:13like why am I here right and so for me
- 6:24:15that was when I created the hypothesis
- 6:24:16or at least the thesis I have for my
- 6:24:18life was that hard work is the goal is
- 6:24:20that nothing left in the tank which I
- 6:24:22got from Jesse gets which I love
- 6:24:23emptying the tank every day is the point
- 6:24:26because for me those are the days that
- 6:24:27when I look back are the days that I
- 6:24:28feel the most fulfilled on in the moment
- 6:24:30you feel tired you feel exhausted you
- 6:24:32feel like you're bored you feel like you
- 6:24:33don't want to do another repetition you
- 6:24:34don't want to do another two hours but
- 6:24:36another two hours another repetition
- 6:24:37another edit is what is required not
- 6:24:40what you want but is what is required
- 6:24:41tired and if you have a little bit left
- 6:24:43in the tank and you don't know if you
- 6:24:44have a little bit left in the tank until
- 6:24:46you empty it, until you physically can.
- 6:24:48And so I think about that steel that
- 6:24:50we're trying to make and the only
- 6:24:51difference is that we are both the steel
- 6:24:53and the blacksmith. And so the creator
- 6:24:55in this would just give you the fire and
- 6:24:56either you can stand far enough away
- 6:24:58from it that it just keeps you warm or
- 6:24:59you can go into it and you can hammer
- 6:25:01out the impurities so that you can just
- 6:25:02become better and better and better and
- 6:25:04stronger. And if you're watching this
- 6:25:06and you would like to start a business,
- 6:25:08but you're not sure where to start. I am
- 6:25:10a co-owner of school and we just started
- 6:25:12the school games. And right now we're
- 6:25:13giving $100,000 away in cash or a cyber
- 6:25:17truck to the person who builds the
- 6:25:19biggest community on school in 30 days.
- 6:25:21And so school's just a community
- 6:25:23platform that helps people start
- 6:25:24businesses. And right now, one out of
- 6:25:26two people who start a community, a paid
- 6:25:29community on school make their first
- 6:25:31dollar online. And so you're like,
- 6:25:33"Okay, well that's cool." And right now,
- 6:25:35on average, the average paid community
- 6:25:36owner makes $1,360 per month. So, this
- 6:25:39is not going to be the thing that makes
- 6:25:41you, you know, a billionaire rich, but
- 6:25:43it can help you get started, which is
- 6:25:44why I invest in the company. I spent
- 6:25:45four years looking for something that
- 6:25:46could make the easiest kind of starter
- 6:25:48business for people to get going,
- 6:25:50especially starting online. The reason
- 6:25:51that we have this success rate, right,
- 6:25:53the reason that we have this very high
- 6:25:54success rate is that I meet every single
- 6:25:57week and onboard new people. So, every
- 6:25:58Monday I'm on a call and I onboard uh,
- 6:26:00you know, right now I think it's about
- 6:26:01300 people per call that are on there.
- 6:26:03Uh, and so I answer questions live uh
- 6:26:05with everyone on there and it's a lot of
- 6:26:07times it's the same faces. So while the
- 6:26:09the calls are relatively small, I'd
- 6:26:10encourage you to come on. On top of
- 6:26:11that, I have kind of like step-by-step
- 6:26:13instructions of exactly what you need to
- 6:26:15do that the best community owners have
- 6:26:17done. And so you can just model the
- 6:26:18behaviors. Just do this stuff. I don't
- 6:26:20explain psychology and triggers and NLP.
- 6:26:22It's just like do this stuff and this is
- 6:26:24what yields this outcome, right? And
- 6:26:27then finally, we'll give you the entire
- 6:26:29platform that basically makes all the
- 6:26:31tech really easy. And so right now we've
- 6:26:34got people who aren't in foreign
- 6:26:35countries who don't speak English. Uh
- 6:26:37we've got I mean I think there was a guy
- 6:26:38who won the games 15 years old. So like
- 6:26:41I'm telling you it's not rocket science.
- 6:26:42Like we've really taken a lot of effort
- 6:26:44to make it as simple as humanly
- 6:26:45possible. You don't need any other
- 6:26:46software to make this work. And so if
- 6:26:49that sounds at all interesting, the best
- 6:26:50part about all of this is that you can
- 6:26:53start absolutely free. And so we have
- 6:26:55the course, we have the calls, we have
- 6:26:56the platform, and we also have the
- 6:26:57community of other people. All right?
- 6:26:58And so you can start for free, get 14
- 6:27:00days. uh you can click the link which is
- 6:27:02uh right here. Oops, other way around.
- 6:27:05school.com/games
- 6:27:07start for free and hopefully I'll see
- 6:27:09you on the other side. And so a big part
- 6:27:11of why this is so hard is that so few
- 6:27:13people want to go into the fire, right?
- 6:27:15And the fire could be entrepreneurship.
- 6:27:16The fire could be content creation. The
- 6:27:18fire could be starting a new product.
- 6:27:20The fire could be doing outreach and
- 6:27:21knocking on doors or quitting your job
- 6:27:23and and and starting another job in a
- 6:27:25completely different industry. That's
- 6:27:26the fire. It's the thing that other
- 6:27:27people aren't willing to do and they
- 6:27:29tell you not to do it because it helps
- 6:27:30them justify the risk that they chose
- 6:27:32not to take. It helps them feel better
- 6:27:34about the risks they aren't willing to
- 6:27:36make. I remember thinking about this at
- 6:27:38long length when I was younger and I
- 6:27:40thought about the word exceptional.
- 6:27:42Right? So buried in the word itself is
- 6:27:46the key point which is that you cannot
- 6:27:48expect to be accepted. If you want to be
- 6:27:51exceptional, to become exceptional, by
- 6:27:53definition, you have to become the
- 6:27:55exception, which means you have to be
- 6:27:57unlike other people. You have to do what
- 6:27:59they don't agree with. If they agreed
- 6:28:01with you, if everyone agrees with you,
- 6:28:03you can be sure that it's the wrong
- 6:28:04path. When I quit my job, every single
- 6:28:07person in my life told me it was a bad
- 6:28:08idea. I graduated in three years from
- 6:28:10Vanderbilt. I had a nice white collar
- 6:28:11consulting job. I was set up to go to
- 6:28:13grad school to one of the Ivy Leagues. I
- 6:28:15had acedc. Like, I was set up. I'd done
- 6:28:17the path. And so for me to quit and be
- 6:28:19like, I'm going to I'm going to be a
- 6:28:20personal trainer for minimum wage at a
- 6:28:21gym, that was not a happy news for the
- 6:28:24vast majority of people that I knew. But
- 6:28:25the thing is is that I've had those
- 6:28:26conversations multiple times in my life.
- 6:28:28When I ended up leaving the gyms and
- 6:28:31started the turnaround business, every
- 6:28:32person was like, you finally made this
- 6:28:33thing work. You finally, you know, now
- 6:28:36we finally agree with you again. And it
- 6:28:37was right at the point where they
- 6:28:38accepted me that I was like, you know
- 6:28:39what? I think I want to do this other
- 6:28:40thing and I'm going to sell all these
- 6:28:42gyms for basically nothing in 90 days to
- 6:28:44then start new. And they're like, "But
- 6:28:46you spent so long on this." And they see
- 6:28:48sunk cost fallacy. And the thing is is
- 6:28:50don't listen to the people who are
- 6:28:52closest to you. Listen to the people who
- 6:28:54are closest to your goals. And so a lot
- 6:28:56of people like to think about how they
- 6:28:59have these mentors and these heroes. But
- 6:29:01the most important group is your
- 6:29:03reference group. And your reference
- 6:29:04group is who you compare yourself to.
- 6:29:06But the thing is that people think they
- 6:29:07compare themselves to their mentors and
- 6:29:09their heroes. But they don't. Who you
- 6:29:10compare yourself to is who influences
- 6:29:13your decisions. So the voices you hear,
- 6:29:16the voices you listen to when you're
- 6:29:18about to make a big move, those voices
- 6:29:21are your actual reference group. And if
- 6:29:23those voices are not close to your goal,
- 6:29:25you should not listen to them. If
- 6:29:27anything, sometimes the best advice in
- 6:29:30the world is do the opposite of whatever
- 6:29:31it is that they did to get in their
- 6:29:32life. If you don't want what they have,
- 6:29:34don't listen to what they say. Even when
- 6:29:36you're an entrepreneur, so let's fast
- 6:29:37forward a couple years. So there was a
- 6:29:39point where I started uh the outbound
- 6:29:42team. So, this is going to sound super
- 6:29:43tactical, but I'm going to zoom out for
- 6:29:45you. So, we at Gym Launch had we were
- 6:29:48all paid ads for the most part. We I
- 6:29:50made content, I had a book, like there
- 6:29:51were things that were out there, but
- 6:29:52still 70% plus of my of my new customers
- 6:29:54came from paid ads. And I knew that if I
- 6:29:56wanted to sell the company, I would have
- 6:29:58to create a second acquisition channel
- 6:30:00that was very different from the primary
- 6:30:02one so that I could create more
- 6:30:03stability so you don't have one itis,
- 6:30:04one point of failure within the
- 6:30:06business. And so I remember reading this
- 6:30:09book about how to set up outbound and it
- 6:30:11said it will take a year and I said I'm
- 6:30:12really good at marketing, really good at
- 6:30:13sales. It'll take me 12 weeks and it
- 6:30:15took 12 months like the book said. And
- 6:30:19so when I walked through that, what was
- 6:30:22interesting is it took 90 days for us to
- 6:30:24get our first sale. And the whole time
- 6:30:26I'm investing in this team, I'm
- 6:30:27investing in software, I'm investing in
- 6:30:29training and consulting to like learn
- 6:30:30how to get all this stuff going just to
- 6:30:32get our first sale. But that's not very
- 6:30:34good for the amount of time and effort
- 6:30:36we put into it. And then 3 months, you
- 6:30:38know, after that, we started getting a
- 6:30:40couple sales trickling in. Still not a
- 6:30:42lot. And I actually had almost like an
- 6:30:43intervention from my my executive team
- 6:30:46that were like, "Hey, we think this is
- 6:30:48shiny object." They were using my words
- 6:30:50against me. They're like, "We think this
- 6:30:51is a distraction. It's it's not, you
- 6:30:53know, yielding a result for us. I don't
- 6:30:55I think we should, you know, cut our
- 6:30:57losses and and move on." And I just I
- 6:30:59kept thinking to myself like, "This is
- 6:31:01what hard feels like." like we have to
- 6:31:03just keep inching our way through it
- 6:31:05because we have made sales which means
- 6:31:06we could just we just need to get more
- 6:31:08efficient at it. And then we did another
- 6:31:09six months and then we got to the point
- 6:31:10where it became 50% of revenue. But
- 6:31:12here's the thing that you you don't see.
- 6:31:14And so whether you're starting a new
- 6:31:15acquisition channel like I was, you're
- 6:31:17starting paid ads, whatever, is that if
- 6:31:20I tell you in one year I could double
- 6:31:23your business, right? Let's say you have
- 6:31:25to pay me $100,000, right? And in one
- 6:31:28year I will double your business. Many
- 6:31:30people would probably be like, "Yeah,
- 6:31:32sign me up. I'll do it. Maybe I'll take
- 6:31:33a loan." But even for the 100, like if I
- 6:31:35know I'm going to double my business in
- 6:31:36a year, I would do it. Okay. But then
- 6:31:37what happens is month one, they drop 5K
- 6:31:41and then they lose 5K. And then month
- 6:31:43two, they lose 5K again. And then they
- 6:31:46say, "Ah, ads aren't for me. H
- 6:31:48Outbound's not for me." But the thing is
- 6:31:50is that the way it actually feels is
- 6:31:52that you lose 5K, you lose another 5K,
- 6:31:55you lose another 5K, and then all of a
- 6:31:57sudden one month you make 25K, and then
- 6:31:59the next month you make 50K, and you
- 6:32:01make all of this back and some, but it
- 6:32:05happens all at once. And so there's a
- 6:32:06saying on Wall Street that I like, which
- 6:32:08is it happens slower than you expect and
- 6:32:10then faster than you can imagine. And
- 6:32:11they talk about that when it comes to
- 6:32:13market drops and market explosions. It's
- 6:32:15like we should like this, we should be
- 6:32:17crashing. It hasn't adjusted yet. It
- 6:32:18happens slower than you expect and then
- 6:32:20faster than you can imagine. And so you
- 6:32:21have to be willing to forego that period
- 6:32:23of time for a long time understanding
- 6:32:25that you just want to make progress. And
- 6:32:27so I think the thing that separates
- 6:32:29masters from beginners is that masters
- 6:32:32have more ways to win. So you can
- 6:32:34measure your expertise in anything by
- 6:32:36the ways you can measure equaling the
- 6:32:38number of times and ways you can win.
- 6:32:39And so if you're an expert at making
- 6:32:43videos, then throughout the entire
- 6:32:45process of a really long project, you
- 6:32:47have many wins on the way. You know all
- 6:32:50the little progress markers that occur
- 6:32:52to create some big outcome and you
- 6:32:54approximate those little progress
- 6:32:55markers for the ultimate goal at the
- 6:32:57end. When you're a beginner, you only
- 6:32:58see the output and all you see is I'm
- 6:33:01doing stuff and nothing is happening.
- 6:33:03But you just aren't able to mark
- 6:33:04progress well. And so if you want to
- 6:33:07increase your expertise, then you need
- 6:33:09to increase the number of ways you can
- 6:33:11measure so that you can increase the
- 6:33:13number of wins you have in a given time
- 6:33:15period. And by the way, that is what
- 6:33:17makes you enjoy your work. And this is
- 6:33:19how the work itself becomes reinforcing.
- 6:33:21And so in order to develop that
- 6:33:22expertise, you have to have education.
- 6:33:25And people think that education is
- 6:33:27expensive. But the only thing more
- 6:33:29expensive than education is not being
- 6:33:32educated. And so I would say that in my
- 6:33:34life I spent more money than I could
- 6:33:36possibly imagine is simply trying to
- 6:33:37acquire skills and relationships that
- 6:33:39would make me better. To give you an
- 6:33:41idea, I think the most expensive thing
- 6:33:43that I bought for this, this is not
- 6:33:44including uh me messing stuff up and
- 6:33:46just losing tons of money, but I
- 6:33:48actually wrote a check for was $350,000
- 6:33:51to have a dinner with a guy who was
- 6:33:52worth 7 billion. And I got exactly what
- 6:33:56I wanted from that dinner and it was
- 6:33:57incredibly valuable for me. And uh he
- 6:33:59kept saying no. I I offered 100k and
- 6:34:02then 200k and 250k and then 350k and
- 6:34:04when we offered 350k he said fine I'll
- 6:34:07just have dinner with you and he didn't
- 6:34:08ask for the money [laughter] but I think
- 6:34:09he was just seeing that I was willing to
- 6:34:11spend the $350,000 for it and so I have
- 6:34:13spent so much money for 1 hour 2 hours
- 6:34:17anything to gain context because I I
- 6:34:20heard this close and you've heard if
- 6:34:22you've watched my channel you've heard
- 6:34:23this before but pick whatever number
- 6:34:24your income goal is right let's say it's
- 6:34:26a million dollars a year and let's say
- 6:34:28you're currently making $100 $100,000 a
- 6:34:31year. If
- 6:34:33you value that million- dollar goal, the
- 6:34:35value of the million dollars per year,
- 6:34:38what's the price you put on that
- 6:34:39education? The value of that education
- 6:34:41is the difference between where you're
- 6:34:42at and where you want to go. And so
- 6:34:44that's why if I want to if I want to
- 6:34:45become a Deca billionaire, then I should
- 6:34:47be willing to pay everything that I have
- 6:34:49in order to gain the skills, the
- 6:34:51experience, the knowledge in order to
- 6:34:52get there. And so if there's a way that
- 6:34:54you can spend $50,000 in order to learn
- 6:34:56a million per year skill set, then every
- 6:35:00year you don't do it, you lose $950,000
- 6:35:02that you would have made if you had made
- 6:35:04that investment. And so the the key
- 6:35:07point here is that we use poor people
- 6:35:09language when we talk about education
- 6:35:11when we should be using investor
- 6:35:12language because it should be an
- 6:35:13investment in an asset and the asset
- 6:35:15just happens to be you and you can't
- 6:35:17sell it, but you can invest in it and
- 6:35:18you can grow it. If you think about
- 6:35:20investments, you'll never say an
- 6:35:21investment is expensive. There's just a
- 6:35:24cost and a return. But if someone says
- 6:35:25there's a $100 stock or $1,000 stock, it
- 6:35:28could be expensive relative to the
- 6:35:30return. But if the return is supposed to
- 6:35:32be good, then no one says that that
- 6:35:34amount of money itself is expensive.
- 6:35:36It's just what the cost is for the
- 6:35:38return. It is the investment. And so if
- 6:35:40you think about education in that same
- 6:35:42way, it always has to be framed in terms
- 6:35:43of what you get for it, not how much it
- 6:35:44costs. It's not about how much you make
- 6:35:47now. It's how much you're going to make
- 6:35:49and how much that's worth to you. And
- 6:35:50for me, whatever my delta is is what I'm
- 6:35:53willing to pour into that without
- 6:35:54hesitation. And so for the first
- 6:35:57probably I mean shoot, I lost everything
- 6:35:59at year whatever six of my
- 6:36:00entrepreneurial journey. And I put all
- 6:36:02of the extra money that I had right back
- 6:36:05into learning more stuff. And so even
- 6:36:06though I made profit, my like biggest
- 6:36:08expense was me. But it wasn't on my
- 6:36:11living and my lifestyle. It was on my
- 6:36:12education and my network and my
- 6:36:14surroundings and the skills I wanted to
- 6:36:15learn. The courses, the workshops, the
- 6:36:17seminars, the coaching programs, all the
- 6:36:18things that I did. I'm a product of that
- 6:36:20world despite the fact that I think that
- 6:36:21world overall has a lot of shitty
- 6:36:22people. I still learned a lot. And you
- 6:36:25can learn just as much by learning what
- 6:36:27not to do and say I will never do that
- 6:36:28or treat someone the way that person
- 6:36:30treated me because the best students
- 6:36:32never come out negative. So really like
- 6:36:34think that like I have always been the
- 6:36:38top performer in every single program,
- 6:36:42coaching, whatever I have ever done. And
- 6:36:44so the process that I use is number one,
- 6:36:47do everything they tell you to to the
- 6:36:50tea the first time. Then take what works
- 6:36:54and toss the rest. You can learn
- 6:36:56something from everyone, but only take
- 6:36:58in that which makes you stronger, which
- 6:36:59is a quote that I have from Harry
- 6:37:01Potter, the Sword of Gryffindor. But I
- 6:37:02love it because it was enchanted to have
- 6:37:04this this spell that it would only take
- 6:37:06in things that made it stronger. So it
- 6:37:07took in the bass venom which allowed it
- 6:37:09to kill you know the horcruxes later on.
- 6:37:11But I like to see myself as that sword
- 6:37:13is that I continue to invest. I continue
- 6:37:15to put things into the steel but I only
- 6:37:17take in that which makes me stronger. So
- 6:37:19a lot of people have these negative
- 6:37:20experiences with coaches, consultants,
- 6:37:22vendors, whatever. And I just like to
- 6:37:24think to myself like in what way will
- 6:37:25this make me better? And so by instead
- 6:37:28asking that question rather than
- 6:37:29enumerating the many things they could
- 6:37:31have done better or the things they did
- 6:37:32wrong simply saying there is something
- 6:37:34that I can learn from this and there is
- 6:37:36something in this experience that will
- 6:37:37make me stronger. And that frame may
- 6:37:39have been one of the most valuable
- 6:37:40frames that I've had because I like you
- 6:37:42have spent plenty of money on things
- 6:37:43that have quote not worked but I still
- 6:37:46learned enough from them and oftentimes
- 6:37:48what not to do that allowed me to then
- 6:37:50see what to do. But before I ever did
- 6:37:52that, I had to do the first three steps
- 6:37:54of that, which was do everything they
- 6:37:56said to the tea the first time. And if
- 6:37:59for whatever reason it did not work, I
- 6:38:02would then use my other skills to patch
- 6:38:03the difference so that I could find a
- 6:38:06way to make it work. And by the way, if
- 6:38:08they have a success story, which they
- 6:38:09usually do cuz that's how they sold you,
- 6:38:11is that you find that person and figure
- 6:38:14out what they are doing that is lacking
- 6:38:16in the education that the person who's
- 6:38:17teaching taught. Fundamentally, if you
- 6:38:19ever buy something where there is
- 6:38:21somebody who has been successful, then
- 6:38:22it means there are activities that yield
- 6:38:24success. And the discrepancy, I'm going
- 6:38:27to show this to you visually because I
- 6:38:28think it's important. So, let's say
- 6:38:29there's a bridge, right? And you've got,
- 6:38:33you know, here's here's money and here's
- 6:38:35you. Okay? So, you've got this path that
- 6:38:38someone uh shows you how to do. So, you
- 6:38:41paid money and they give you these
- 6:38:43little bricks here, right? They give you
- 6:38:44these little bricks that you paid money
- 6:38:45for. And maybe these bricks, you had to
- 6:38:47pay different vendors, different amounts
- 6:38:48of money for each one of these bricks,
- 6:38:50but you still haven't made money yet.
- 6:38:51The thing is is that there's a gap here.
- 6:38:54And the reason that some people are
- 6:38:55successful with some people's uh, you
- 6:38:57know, programs or implementations and
- 6:38:59other people aren't is because that the
- 6:39:01people who already bought that brick
- 6:39:02from somebody else before that, that
- 6:39:05brick isn't missing. And so if you see
- 6:39:07the education you have as these bricks
- 6:39:09on the road, then you wouldn't say that
- 6:39:11the foundation of a house is in some way
- 6:39:13a ripoff. you would just say it's not a
- 6:39:15complete house. Now, if they sold you
- 6:39:17the expectation that you would have a
- 6:39:19house, sure, you could be upset by them,
- 6:39:21but they still helped you build a
- 6:39:22foundation. And so, it's the same people
- 6:39:24who get upset saying, "Oh, I learned
- 6:39:26arithmetic from Mrs. Glass, but then
- 6:39:28when I found Mr. Hardwick and he taught
- 6:39:30me calculus, she only taught me
- 6:39:32arithmetic. She is a moron." You
- 6:39:33wouldn't say that, but for some reason,
- 6:39:35people talk about the basics of business
- 6:39:37the same way when they become more
- 6:39:39advanced. If someone taught you how to
- 6:39:41do outbound and do warm outreach so that
- 6:39:43you could sell your first customers and
- 6:39:44someone else later teaches you how to
- 6:39:46run ads, well, you probably learned how
- 6:39:48to work the leads from the ads that work
- 6:39:49for you because you learned how to do
- 6:39:50outbound. You probably learned how to
- 6:39:51sell because you learned how to sell
- 6:39:52strangers. And so when you did the ads,
- 6:39:54it worked for you. And then somebody
- 6:39:55else who did that same exact
- 6:39:56implementation, didn't have the bricks
- 6:39:58that you had and they never got the
- 6:40:00dollars that came across. And so
- 6:40:02whenever something doesn't work, if you
- 6:40:04can, it doesn't make you any better by
- 6:40:06saying it's their fault. And fault also
- 6:40:08only matters in the eyes of the law,
- 6:40:10which you're not going to sue anybody
- 6:40:11anyways. So, who gives a [ __ ] The only
- 6:40:13thing that matters is whether the
- 6:40:14outcome happens or not, which is under
- 6:40:16your control because it means that you
- 6:40:18simply have a discrepancy in where you
- 6:40:19are and where you want to go. And so, a
- 6:40:21lot of people would then say, "Sure,
- 6:40:23Alex, it's easy for you to say you're a
- 6:40:25white guy. You're right. Cool. So, just
- 6:40:28don't watch the video and move on." Um,
- 6:40:29but for everybody else, you've got
- 6:40:31connections,
- 6:40:33you've got money, you've got looks,
- 6:40:36you've got intellect or intelligence.
- 6:40:37These are all great, but you can beat
- 6:40:40all of these. You can beat somebody who
- 6:40:42has all four if you have one thing,
- 6:40:45which is the desire to improve, the
- 6:40:49insatiable desire to improve. No matter
- 6:40:51where you start, if you have this, it's
- 6:40:53hard to beat someone who improves every
- 6:40:55second of every day without stopping,
- 6:40:58without giving up. And so I have met
- 6:41:00people who have connections, money,
- 6:41:00looks, and intelligence. And they do not
- 6:41:03people who have an insatiable desire to
- 6:41:04improve, who do not stop. And so if you
- 6:41:07think about it like this, if life were a
- 6:41:09race where at the end you die, so got to
- 6:41:12finish first, right? There are people
- 6:41:14who may start at different parts of that
- 6:41:17race, but what is not measured is the
- 6:41:20speed that you can move. And so, I don't
- 6:41:22know if you've seen these these clips
- 6:41:23that have gone viral in the NFL where
- 6:41:24they have like one of their wide
- 6:41:25receivers start like 20 yards behind a
- 6:41:27fan and they have to race the length of
- 6:41:29the football field and then the wide
- 6:41:30receiver will usually catch up like talk
- 6:41:32to them and then just speed right past
- 6:41:34them. And so, it's far less about where
- 6:41:36you start because that's where a lot of
- 6:41:38losers will define themselves. They'll
- 6:41:39define themselves by what happened to
- 6:41:41them rather than what they made happen.
- 6:41:43and somebody else may be here, but it
- 6:41:45only matters if you think that there's
- 6:41:47fairness. But I don't believe fairness
- 6:41:48is something that exists in the
- 6:41:50universe. And so I don't hold it as an
- 6:41:52ideal that I proclaim must exist. But
- 6:41:54there is simply a starting point in a
- 6:41:56rate of progress. And the starting point
- 6:41:58you can't control, but the rate of
- 6:41:59progress you can. And so control what
- 6:42:01you can control. If education is a
- 6:42:04change in behavior, that's what you do.
- 6:42:05If you become educated, you do something
- 6:42:06different after you learn something.
- 6:42:08Then intelligence is rate of learning
- 6:42:10which means that you can in a very real
- 6:42:11way influence it's the rate of learning
- 6:42:14the speed of learning. You can influence
- 6:42:16how quickly you move along this race
- 6:42:19independent of where you start. And
- 6:42:20you'll also note that the person here
- 6:42:24has no influence on what this person
- 6:42:26does. These two people are independent
- 6:42:28nodes. The only reason that this person
- 6:42:30gets upset is that they think it's not
- 6:42:33fair. And if you just eliminate fairness
- 6:42:35from your vocabulary and think only in
- 6:42:37terms of what do I need to do, then it
- 6:42:39eliminates a lot of the distraction that
- 6:42:41keeps you poor. So if you call recall
- 6:42:44from the very beginning, lazy people get
- 6:42:47distracted. They focus on distraction.
- 6:42:50And one of the biggest distractions is
- 6:42:51it's not fair. It's it's not fair. I
- 6:42:53shouldn't have to. I should get. I
- 6:42:55should. I should. It should. Things
- 6:42:58shouldn't. It's all shoulds. And I will
- 6:43:01tell you that should in my worldview
- 6:43:05should not exist because should creates
- 6:43:08expectations of an uncaring universe. It
- 6:43:10says that you demand something and I
- 6:43:12promise you that the universe will win.
- 6:43:14And so all you have to do is watch like
- 6:43:16baby seals just get immediately eaten by
- 6:43:18orcas after like a mother is laying
- 6:43:20there on the ice to be like, "Wow, life
- 6:43:23isn't fair." I'm sure that seal could be
- 6:43:25like, "It's not fair that my babies were
- 6:43:27literally eaten in front of me." Tough,
- 6:43:29right? Tough. They have mammal brains.
- 6:43:31We can see that they got they got some
- 6:43:32feelings, right? And so if we go back to
- 6:43:36the sword of Gryffindor, does demanding
- 6:43:38that it should be fair make you
- 6:43:39stronger? Does saying that that person
- 6:43:41started further ahead of you in any way
- 6:43:43benefit you? No. Because your actions
- 6:43:46are entirely independent from them. And
- 6:43:48so the only thing that that does is
- 6:43:50actually delay your speed of taking
- 6:43:52action. It makes you dumber. Because if
- 6:43:54we define intelligence by rate of
- 6:43:56learning, then it means it takes you
- 6:43:58longer to learn. It makes you stupid.
- 6:44:00And I think that that's why people stay
- 6:44:02here for a very long time.
- 6:44:05And many of them never leave. So one of
- 6:44:08the things
- 6:44:10that bad entrepreneurs talk about with
- 6:44:13good entrepreneurs is one of the excuses
- 6:44:16they'll make is that they will make
- 6:44:18preference excuses. They will make
- 6:44:19trade-off excuses. They will say this is
- 6:44:23not worth the price. In which case,
- 6:44:25fine, but don't also want the thing. So
- 6:44:28for example, privacy is the price of
- 6:44:30fame. Loneliness is the price of
- 6:44:32ambition. Pleasure is the price of
- 6:44:35discipline. Novelty is the price of
- 6:44:37loyalty. Discretion is the price of
- 6:44:40trust. And so so many people want the
- 6:44:42benefits of these traits, but can't
- 6:44:45afford the cost or the price. They're
- 6:44:47not willing to be discreet, but they
- 6:44:48want someone to trust them. They can't
- 6:44:49hold someone's secrets. They they want
- 6:44:51somebody to be be loyal to them at home,
- 6:44:54but then they want the thrill of the new
- 6:44:56relationship. They want the benefits of
- 6:44:57discipline, of consistency, but they
- 6:44:59can't trade the pleasure in the moment.
- 6:45:02They want ambition, but they're not
- 6:45:05willing to pay the price of being
- 6:45:06lonely, of being the exception. They
- 6:45:08want fame, but then all of a sudden they
- 6:45:11are startled when they realize that they
- 6:45:13have no privacy. And so each of these
- 6:45:15things are tradeoffs. And if you're not
- 6:45:18willing to make the trade, fine, but
- 6:45:20don't [ __ ] about it. And and I think
- 6:45:22part of it is that we have a hard time
- 6:45:24understanding to what degree. And so
- 6:45:26each of these ideals are not binary.
- 6:45:31It's not discretion. It's how much
- 6:45:33discretion you have. It's not novelty,
- 6:45:34it's how much novelty. It's not
- 6:45:35pleasure, it's how much pleasure. It's
- 6:45:37not loneliness, it's how lonely. And
- 6:45:38it's not hard work. It's how hard do you
- 6:45:41have to work and how long do you have to
- 6:45:43work? And so most people, and I think
- 6:45:45this is where a lot of the complaints
- 6:45:46come, is that they believe they're doing
- 6:45:4810 out of 10 work, right? They're like,
- 6:45:50I'm do this is 10 out of 10 hard for me
- 6:45:52right now, but they're actually only
- 6:45:55doing onetenth
- 6:45:58of the amount of work that it takes to
- 6:46:00get to this goal. And so they might be
- 6:46:02doing a 10 out of 10 work for a 100K
- 6:46:04goal, but they're doing a 1 out of 10
- 6:46:06work for a $1 million goal. And I think
- 6:46:09a lot of that work comes down to being
- 6:46:10able to accurately assess reality and
- 6:46:14see what your actual discrepancies are
- 6:46:16and realize how much work you really
- 6:46:18have to do in order to get good at every
- 6:46:20one of those discrepancies because most
- 6:46:22outcomes don't occur until you've met
- 6:46:24all of the conditions like a pipeline.
- 6:46:26All right? So let's say you've got this
- 6:46:28pipeline here and you've got these
- 6:46:29valves. These are the valves. You've got
- 6:46:31this water that's coming here and let's
- 6:46:33say once you get all the way through the
- 6:46:34water comes out the other side. These
- 6:46:36valves have to open. You have to open
- 6:46:39this thing. Open each of these valves.
- 6:46:42And let's say you've checked off three
- 6:46:43of the four boxes. The water's still
- 6:46:45going to be stuck here. You're still not
- 6:46:46going to get the water through. And so
- 6:46:48the thing is is that as much as you work
- 6:46:49and you're like, "But I did that and I
- 6:46:51did that and that didn't work and that
- 6:46:53didn't work. It may have worked. It just
- 6:46:56might not have met every condition to
- 6:46:58get the outcome." And so if you think
- 6:46:59about life and outcomes that way, it
- 6:47:01gets a lot easier because it stops being
- 6:47:03emotional. You can simply say there's a
- 6:47:04condition that I haven't met and I have
- 6:47:06to figure out what that condition is
- 6:47:07rather than proclaiming that the
- 6:47:09universe isn't fair or that you you
- 6:47:11started further back and that's why your
- 6:47:14effort hasn't resulted in it. Maybe and
- 6:47:18maybe this person only has to meet three
- 6:47:20of these and you have to meet four.
- 6:47:23Okay. Well, then I guess that means that
- 6:47:24you're going to be better than them. Why
- 6:47:27is that a bad thing? It means that
- 6:47:28you're going to develop more skills to
- 6:47:29achieve the same goal. Great. If the end
- 6:47:32of this life is that you are the steel,
- 6:47:35you are the thing that gets created,
- 6:47:37then you can't resent the hammer and the
- 6:47:39fire that makes you. Because you can't
- 6:47:41wish for strong character and an easy
- 6:47:43life because the price of each is the
- 6:47:45other. So either people aren't
- 6:47:47succeeding because they don't understand
- 6:47:48that they have to make a trade that
- 6:47:49they're not willing to make or the trade
- 6:47:51that they're currently making isn't
- 6:47:52sufficient. So they either think that
- 6:47:54they deserve to get the Nike shoes just
- 6:47:56for being who they are and think it's
- 6:47:58not fair and think that the store owner
- 6:47:59should just give them the Nike shoes.
- 6:48:00And look, all you have to do is look at
- 6:48:01the news. There's plenty of people who
- 6:48:02think that way and they go and try and
- 6:48:04take it, right? But that makes them a
- 6:48:05thief. That makes them significantly
- 6:48:07worse. It actually does more harm to
- 6:48:08them in my opinion. But there are people
- 6:48:10who believe that. That's the worst.
- 6:48:12That's the lowest level. The next level
- 6:48:13above that is people who say, "No, I'm
- 6:48:15willing to pay for the Nikes, but I'll
- 6:48:16pay 30." It's like, "Yeah, but they're
- 6:48:18they're 300. That's the price." It's
- 6:48:21like, "Yeah, but I'll pay 30." They
- 6:48:22don't extend they understand the extent
- 6:48:24of the trade-off and then they complain
- 6:48:26that their $30 isn't good enough. It
- 6:48:28shouldn't be so expensive. It is what it
- 6:48:30is. And so there's a saying that Leila
- 6:48:32and I say a lot internally. I'm like it
- 6:48:33takes what it takes. And so if we want
- 6:48:35this thing, what often has to happen is
- 6:48:37you have to keep bidding. It's much more
- 6:48:39like an auction of a trade-off because
- 6:48:41the real world level three is that you
- 6:48:43see the Nikes and then you bid 30 and
- 6:48:46then you realize it's not enough. And
- 6:48:48rather than moan or put your thing down
- 6:48:50and walk away, you're like 50. And
- 6:48:52they're like, you're like 100.
- 6:48:56You're like, God. And so that is the
- 6:48:58pain is being able to consistently reset
- 6:49:00the expectations and bid again and again
- 6:49:03and again until eventually you make it
- 6:49:06all the way through and you bid $300.
- 6:49:10You do get your Nikes and then all of a
- 6:49:12sudden everyone says
- 6:49:15must be nice to be born so naturally
- 6:49:19good. All you have to do by the way is
- 6:49:21watch some of my very first content
- 6:49:22pieces. And you think my very first
- 6:49:24content pieces are the podcasts that I
- 6:49:25made. various for content pieces that I
- 6:49:27made I made for my gyms 13 years ago.
- 6:49:30And so it's like, man, you're so
- 6:49:32naturally good on camera. Watch those
- 6:49:33videos. [laughter]
- 6:49:35Tell me if you think the same way. I had
- 6:49:36to take shots before the videos cuz I
- 6:49:38was so nervous about sounding stupid. In
- 6:49:39the fourth version, I would say like the
- 6:49:40highest version of this. So let let's
- 6:49:42I'll I'll break this down. So the zero
- 6:49:44level of trade-offs is should you just
- 6:49:48say you should get it for nothing. The
- 6:49:50next level is too much. So you say it's
- 6:49:5330 bucks, but it's actually 300. And you
- 6:49:56say it should. The next level is
- 6:49:59bidding. So you bid. So you say 30, 50,
- 6:50:04100, and you find out that you're
- 6:50:05insufficient. You keep going up. The
- 6:50:07final is source, which is where you
- 6:50:09determine the price. And this is often,
- 6:50:10in my opinion, where you create your
- 6:50:12reality. So, it's continuing to hammer
- 6:50:15away at content, continuing to write
- 6:50:17drafts of the book before anyone else
- 6:50:19has seen it because you are the one that
- 6:50:21holds a standard higher than everyone
- 6:50:22else's because no longer do you accept
- 6:50:25the approval of others as your litmus
- 6:50:28test. The market for sure in the
- 6:50:30beginning will tell you whether you're
- 6:50:31good or not. But Steve Jobs, Henry Ford,
- 6:50:34right, they would have asked for faster
- 6:50:35horses, not cars, is that they demand
- 6:50:39more from themselves than anyone else
- 6:50:41does. And by setting that standard here
- 6:50:43where everyone else is here, by actually
- 6:50:46meeting the standards of the market, you
- 6:50:48actually lower your own. And so this is
- 6:50:50where your standards become source. And
- 6:50:52this is where you get into rarified air.
- 6:50:53And this is what the quote rich guys, if
- 6:50:57you will, when we talk behind closed
- 6:50:59doors about what people don't
- 6:51:00understand. It's about holding the
- 6:51:02standard. And in my opinion, the person
- 6:51:03who should make the decision in every
- 6:51:05organization is the person who has the
- 6:51:06highest standard. It's not the person
- 6:51:07who's most senior, not the person who
- 6:51:09has the most shares. It's the person who
- 6:51:11has the highest standards for whatever
- 6:51:12it is. Our marketing should be at this
- 6:51:14level. If the owner thinks it's less,
- 6:51:16then that person should be the person
- 6:51:17who's running marketing. If somebody
- 6:51:19else thinks the product needs to be this
- 6:51:20good and someone else thinks it be less,
- 6:51:22that person should be in charge, whether
- 6:51:23it's their first day or the thousandth
- 6:51:25day. The person who has the highest
- 6:51:27standards is the one who should be
- 6:51:28making the decision. They should become
- 6:51:29source. And so when you get to that
- 6:51:31level, the only person you're making
- 6:51:32trade-offs with is yourself. You're the
- 6:51:34one who's determining
- 6:51:36is this good enough for me to put my
- 6:51:39name on rather than is this good enough
- 6:51:41for them to say it's good. And for
- 6:51:43example, J.R.R. Tolkien worked on The
- 6:51:46Hobbit for a decade and he didn't even
- 6:51:49submit the draft. One of his friends saw
- 6:51:51that he had been working on it for a
- 6:51:52decade and submitted it, grabbed it from
- 6:51:53his desk and submitted it for him to a
- 6:51:55publisher and then it obviously became
- 6:51:57The Hobbit and and everything came after
- 6:51:59that. And so his standards were so high
- 6:52:02that he still didn't even think it was
- 6:52:04ready, but it was still so good that
- 6:52:05they ended up releasing it. Now, many of
- 6:52:06you think that you are J.R. Tolken. But
- 6:52:08most of you were not. It's actually just
- 6:52:10very bad. And so once you realize how
- 6:52:13high your standards really have to be in
- 6:52:15order to be excellent, what you then
- 6:52:17have this daunting realization is that
- 6:52:20you can only do two to four things
- 6:52:24in your whole life because of how long
- 6:52:26it really takes to get to there. And so
- 6:52:29it's like I want to be the best author
- 6:52:31in the world. That's not a desire of
- 6:52:33mine to be clear. But if I wanted to be
- 6:52:34the best author in the world that I know
- 6:52:36that that's going to take at least a
- 6:52:37decade of actually working hard every
- 6:52:40single day to get better. And believing
- 6:52:42that for me because I'm special, I
- 6:52:44should somehow be able to be my first
- 6:52:46book is an overnight success. And and
- 6:52:48and and that is the thing that chains
- 6:52:50you to mediocrity. It's believing that
- 6:52:52it should be a different way rather than
- 6:52:53accepting reality as it is and then
- 6:52:55changing your actions as a consequence.
- 6:52:56And so this is also why lazy people
- 6:53:00distract themselves
- 6:53:04because distraction
- 6:53:08makes you believe the lie that you can
- 6:53:10try a hundred things and then figure out
- 6:53:12which one works when the reality any of
- 6:53:14them can work but none of them will work
- 6:53:16unless you pick one to work on and then
- 6:53:18that is you making it work. The vast
- 6:53:21majority of things with enough iteration
- 6:53:23can become success. It's just that
- 6:53:24people underestimate how many iterations
- 6:53:25they need to have. It's 19 drafts, not
- 6:53:28two. It's 500 minutes of editing to make
- 6:53:31the video, not 50. It's making a,000
- 6:53:35phone calls every week for two years,
- 6:53:39not two months. And so, most of the
- 6:53:42times, it's just that our level of
- 6:53:44understanding, it's it's here. And this
- 6:53:47is where a lot of people get stuck. A
- 6:53:48lot of people get stuck here. They say,
- 6:53:50"I should be better. This should be
- 6:53:52easier. I've already paid a little bit.
- 6:53:54I said I was willing to pay 30. The Nike
- 6:53:56store owner won't give me the shoes. And
- 6:53:58then you basically are the same as this
- 6:54:00person. You just have a price at that. I
- 6:54:01should I should. It should be. I
- 6:54:03deserve. I am worth.
- 6:54:06Takes what it takes. It costs what it
- 6:54:07costs. You got to be willing to make the
- 6:54:08trade. No matter what your goal is, you
- 6:54:10will suffer to achieve it. So, pick a
- 6:54:12goal big enough. It's worth suffering
- 6:54:14for. Here's how to achieve that goal.
- 6:54:16Give me the next 30 minutes and I'll
- 6:54:18help you make the most of your 20s and
- 6:54:19your 30s. So, I made my first million
- 6:54:21when I was 26. A decade later, my
- 6:54:23portfolio companies generated last year
- 6:54:24over $250 million in aggregate revenue.
- 6:54:27And I'm 36 now. And so in this video,
- 6:54:28I'm going to give you the real world
- 6:54:29advice that I wish someone had told me
- 6:54:31much earlier. So number one is you want
- 6:54:33to take asymmetric bets. If you're under
- 6:54:3630, you have no reason not to go 100%
- 6:54:39allin on your goals. The downside is
- 6:54:42nothing and the upside is everything. If
- 6:54:44you think about life as giving you kind
- 6:54:46of lottery tickets, right? You can
- 6:54:48scratch off a ticket and if you don't
- 6:54:50win, then what did you lose? The
- 6:54:53scratchoff ticket. But the thing is is
- 6:54:54that when you have nothing to lose, you
- 6:54:56have nothing to lose and you only have
- 6:54:59things to gain. And so the objective
- 6:55:01when you have as little as you can is to
- 6:55:02take as many shots as possible because
- 6:55:05your downside is zero, right? And so
- 6:55:08it's the only time in your career where
- 6:55:09you can take more shots than anyone
- 6:55:11else. And so the reason or the fact that
- 6:55:14people don't take shots and myself
- 6:55:15included when I was younger, I was so
- 6:55:17afraid to take a shot. But the only
- 6:55:18reason that was holding me back was the
- 6:55:21belief that other people who I don't
- 6:55:23even talk to anymore would somehow judge
- 6:55:25me as a quote failure. You never
- 6:55:27actually start from scratch ever again
- 6:55:30because every time after the first time
- 6:55:32you start from scratch, you start with
- 6:55:33an experience. So you still always net a
- 6:55:36positive. And so that's the beautiful
- 6:55:38thing about taking shots is that you
- 6:55:39either get the big win or more likely
- 6:55:42you learn something and then that
- 6:55:44learning compounds. And so the thing is
- 6:55:47is that I had a misunderstanding of how
- 6:55:50success worked which is that it's far
- 6:55:51more stacking many things on top of each
- 6:55:54other than it is nothing nothing and
- 6:55:57then something works. Right? And so if
- 6:55:58you imagine success like a bridge,
- 6:56:01right? So you're over here and you've
- 6:56:03got this chasm that you have to get
- 6:56:04across. Right? This is, you know, let's
- 6:56:06say there's alligators here and lava and
- 6:56:08all sorts of stuff, right? And then
- 6:56:09there's you over here who's got, you
- 6:56:11know, your big smiley face and you're
- 6:56:12happy and you're doing all the stuff you
- 6:56:13want. The thing is is that I thought
- 6:56:15that I just kept wanting to jump over
- 6:56:17this gap over and over again and think
- 6:56:19like if I just jumped hard enough or if
- 6:56:21I had the right opportunity, that's what
- 6:56:23would do it. But more likely than not,
- 6:56:25it's really like you install these these
- 6:56:27bricks on the path and you keep you keep
- 6:56:30walking and it's like, okay, well, I
- 6:56:31fall here. Okay, well, I'll fix this one
- 6:56:33later. And then you take a and then you
- 6:56:35you start again and then you fall here
- 6:56:37and then you fix this and you keep going
- 6:56:38and then you fall here and then you fix
- 6:56:40this and then all of a sudden you make
- 6:56:42it all the way across. And that's what
- 6:56:44it looks like or what the experience of
- 6:56:46kind of becoming the overnight success
- 6:56:48is and that's why so many people talk
- 6:56:49about it where uh it doesn't happen at
- 6:56:52all and then happens all at once. It's
- 6:56:54not that it happens all at once. The
- 6:56:55actual outcome of getting a system to
- 6:56:57work all the way through that is binary.
- 6:57:00But the process of building the system
- 6:57:01is actually very linear. I'm also not
- 6:57:04saying this from a position of um like
- 6:57:06even though I I you know I saw some
- 6:57:07success early in my career, I also
- 6:57:09started pretty early. And so I had nine
- 6:57:11failed businesses, nine before I had one
- 6:57:14that really worked. And so I bring this
- 6:57:17up to say that like I don't know what
- 6:57:18failure you're on right now. Maybe
- 6:57:20you're on zero failures, you're on one
- 6:57:22failure or two failures, but you have
- 6:57:24way more failures in you at the end of
- 6:57:26the day. Like one of the big
- 6:57:26realizations I had is that since life is
- 6:57:28an infinite game and what that means is
- 6:57:31that there are there are games where you
- 6:57:32have a defined time period and at the
- 6:57:34end you count the score, right? And then
- 6:57:36there's infinite games where the only
- 6:57:38point of the game is to keep playing the
- 6:57:40game. And so like the point of marriage
- 6:57:43is not to get married, it's to stay
- 6:57:45married. The point of health is not to
- 6:57:47get healthy, it's to stay healthy. And
- 6:57:49the point of business is not to get into
- 6:57:51business, but to stay in business. And
- 6:57:53so basically the only thing that you
- 6:57:55have to do to stay in business is to
- 6:57:57choose to continue to fight. And so once
- 6:58:00you realize that, then you realize that
- 6:58:02you become a success the moment you
- 6:58:04decide you are. Because being successful
- 6:58:05is far more about being in the game,
- 6:58:07about being in the arena. And so when
- 6:58:09you're in your 20s, what you lack in
- 6:58:11experience, you have to make up for in
- 6:58:13effort and hours. And believing
- 6:58:15otherwise leads to a life of honestly
- 6:58:17well-deserved mediocrity. So if you're
- 6:58:19hearing this, you're like, "Okay, I got
- 6:58:21it. I need to take more bets and I need
- 6:58:22to take maybe riskier bets because my
- 6:58:24downside is nothing. All right. Well,
- 6:58:26which bets do I take? So number two,
- 6:58:28don't follow your passion. So passion is
- 6:58:31vague and so it's very difficult to say
- 6:58:33I like this thing more than this thing.
- 6:58:34But what you can say is I'm better at
- 6:58:36this than that. And so passion usually
- 6:58:39then comes from competence, not creates
- 6:58:43competence. And so we usually like
- 6:58:44things that we get good at rather than
- 6:58:46getting good at things that we like,
- 6:58:47right? And so this is the thing like
- 6:58:49that I think confuses a lot of people.
- 6:58:50And so the other flip side of this is
- 6:58:52that enjoying something doesn't even
- 6:58:53guarantee that you're good at it or that
- 6:58:54you're going to be able to make money
- 6:58:55from it. And I remember my dad used to
- 6:58:57tell me when I was much younger, he
- 6:58:58said, "Listen, if I were following my
- 6:58:59passion, I'd be a bartender at a ski
- 6:59:01slope, right?" He said, "If you can just
- 6:59:02make money," he said, "The rest of your
- 6:59:03life, you can do whatever you want." And
- 6:59:04I actually think it was very practical
- 6:59:06advice for me. And I'm very grateful
- 6:59:07that I got that. But the thing is is
- 6:59:08that getting good at anything, you have
- 6:59:10to slog through this period where you're
- 6:59:11probably not going to be passionate
- 6:59:12about it because it's very boring. It's
- 6:59:13very monotonous. It's very repetitive.
- 6:59:15Right? It's it's one thing to say, "Oh,
- 6:59:16I like ping pong." It's another thing to
- 6:59:17say like I hit 500 forehands and 500
- 6:59:19backhands every morning and every night,
- 6:59:20right? It's a different level of
- 6:59:22dedication that you have to have to it.
- 6:59:23And that isn't going to be something
- 6:59:24you're passionate about. You might like
- 6:59:25playing the game, but getting good at
- 6:59:26the game are two very different things,
- 6:59:28right? And so it sets this false
- 6:59:30expectation that I think ultimately
- 6:59:31harms more people. And I think one of
- 6:59:34the biggest reasons of not following
- 6:59:35your passion is that your passions will
- 6:59:37change as you age. I promise you, the
- 6:59:40things that I was passionate about when
- 6:59:40I was 20 is not things I'm passion about
- 6:59:42now. And I'm sure that things I'm
- 6:59:43passionate about when I'm in my mid and
- 6:59:44late 40s are going to be different than
- 6:59:45things I'm now. Same as 50s and 60s. And
- 6:59:47so this idea that like I have to find
- 6:59:49this one thing, it puts a ton of
- 6:59:50pressure on that thing that it has to be
- 6:59:52perfect forever. And if it's not going
- 6:59:53to be perfect forever, then why don't we
- 6:59:55be practical now so that we can give
- 6:59:57ourselves options later. So
- 6:59:58fundamentally, all we're going to look
- 7:00:00for are things that you're good at that
- 7:00:02people already spend money on because
- 7:00:04that creates a very high likelihood
- 7:00:06outcome of you creating something that
- 7:00:08you can exchange in the marketplace.
- 7:00:09Once you've decided on something that
- 7:00:11you want to get better at, you're
- 7:00:11already good at it. You want to get
- 7:00:12better at it, which is hopefully, you
- 7:00:14know, maybe it is your passion, which be
- 7:00:15amazing, but a lot of times it's not.
- 7:00:17The next thing is you have to get good
- 7:00:18at one thing.
- 7:00:20Think about the equal opposite of this.
- 7:00:22How would I get someone to be poor? I
- 7:00:24would get them to keep starting new
- 7:00:26things rather than getting good at one
- 7:00:28thing. And so, do you remember that guy
- 7:00:30who got rich dropshipping, day trading,
- 7:00:33buying crypto, and wholesaling all at
- 7:00:35the same time? Yeah. Me neither. You
- 7:00:37have to focus. And it's arrogant to
- 7:00:39think that you can do multiple things at
- 7:00:40once and beat someone who does one thing
- 7:00:42with all their effort. You have to pick
- 7:00:44one thing and go allin and then you
- 7:00:46become the one who's hard to beat. So I
- 7:00:48told you earlier that I had nine failed
- 7:00:50businesses. Now here's the part that a
- 7:00:51lot of people don't know. Six of those I
- 7:00:53had at the same time. And so I like to
- 7:00:55tell people, oh yeah, I'm a CEO. I've
- 7:00:57got multiple companies, right? Like kind
- 7:00:59of the way I do now. But it's very
- 7:01:01different now because the thing is is
- 7:01:02that I actually have CEOs who run those
- 7:01:04businesses, right? Not me. Because you
- 7:01:06can only be CEO of one thing. You can
- 7:01:08only drive one thing. Now
- 7:01:10IDriveacquisquisition.com,
- 7:01:12right? But CEOs of each of the divisions
- 7:01:14of each of the portfolio companies, like
- 7:01:15those are people who run their own
- 7:01:16profit and loss statements. And I didn't
- 7:01:18understand that. And so I had a
- 7:01:20chiropractor agency, a dental agency, a
- 7:01:22gym launch business where we did
- 7:01:23turnarounds. I And then I also had five
- 7:01:26gyms of my own at the time. All right?
- 7:01:28Depending on how you want to describe
- 7:01:29it, I had five locations plus the three.
- 7:01:30So I had eight. It's a lot. All right?
- 7:01:32It was too much. And because of that, I
- 7:01:34was stressed out of my mind. I was so
- 7:01:36spread thin and basically I had lots of
- 7:01:38things that generated revenue and I
- 7:01:40didn't make any money. The only thing
- 7:01:41that it fed was my ego, not my bank
- 7:01:43account. When did this big turnaround
- 7:01:45happen for me? Leila came into my life
- 7:01:46and she was like, "Hey, you're clearly
- 7:01:48really good at this one thing. Why don't
- 7:01:50we just cut everything else?" And that's
- 7:01:52exactly what I did. It was the hardest
- 7:01:54period of my life cuz I had to shut down
- 7:01:55all the other businesses but one, which
- 7:01:56also meant that I had to end
- 7:01:57partnerships with all these different
- 7:01:59other people that were relying on me.
- 7:02:01And that was hard. I'm not going to lie.
- 7:02:02Like it was not fun. Like these are
- 7:02:04people that I liked. But I had to make
- 7:02:06this decision. I had to cut off the life
- 7:02:08that I didn't want to have the life I
- 7:02:10wanted. If you want to impress people
- 7:02:12who are poor, talk about how many things
- 7:02:14you do. If you want to impress people
- 7:02:16who are rich, talk about how good you
- 7:02:18are at one thing. Like, at the end of
- 7:02:19the day, your ability to demonstrate
- 7:02:22excellence is going to be the only thing
- 7:02:24that someone who is ahead of you will
- 7:02:26look at. And so, you only fool the
- 7:02:28people who have no idea. And I'll be
- 7:02:30real, there's a lot of people who have
- 7:02:31no idea. So the thing is is that this is
- 7:02:33where the whole imposttor syndrome will
- 7:02:35start creeping up on you because you're
- 7:02:37like man I you know I kind of feel like
- 7:02:38a little bit of imposter because you are
- 7:02:40you're misrepresenting yourself. You
- 7:02:42know you're not as successful as you
- 7:02:43pretend to be. And so if you want to
- 7:02:45eliminate imposter syndrome just stop
- 7:02:47lying. When I say lying people like I
- 7:02:48don't lie. If you present something in a
- 7:02:50way that you know is going to be
- 7:02:51perceived differently than what reality
- 7:02:53is posturing in my opinion lying. You're
- 7:02:56misrepresenting. What you want to be
- 7:02:57able to do is state the facts and tell
- 7:02:59the truth. Period. And then if those
- 7:03:01facts and truth are not compelling and
- 7:03:02do not get you status, then change the
- 7:03:05facts and change the truth. Meaning not
- 7:03:07that you lie about them, but you work so
- 7:03:09hard that the truth is compelling. And
- 7:03:11sometimes that takes time. But I promise
- 7:03:12you, the people who are who are all in
- 7:03:14only on the imposter stuff, the guys
- 7:03:15that I knew that are that were, you
- 7:03:16know, when I was in my 20s who were kind
- 7:03:18of like hustle bros, whatever, a lot of
- 7:03:20those guys faded, you know, and or
- 7:03:22they're still like jumping from thing to
- 7:03:23thing to thing, kind of like pretending
- 7:03:24to be successful, but like I know that
- 7:03:27they're barely able to afford their
- 7:03:28house. At the end of the day, it's a
- 7:03:29choice that you have to make. Do I want
- 7:03:31to pretend to be rich? Do I want to
- 7:03:33pretend to be successful? Do I want to
- 7:03:34look like I'm successful? Or do I want
- 7:03:36to be successful, which more likely is
- 7:03:38do the things that success requires,
- 7:03:40which today do not look like success. It
- 7:03:42looks like a very long string of
- 7:03:44failures. Because you will be
- 7:03:45[clears throat] rewarded far more in
- 7:03:46life for your determination than your
- 7:03:48intelligence. But the problem with
- 7:03:50determination is is that in the short
- 7:03:52term, it looks like a long string of
- 7:03:54failures until it works. Okay? So,
- 7:03:56you're like, "Got it. I'm going to
- 7:03:57focus." Now, let me give you something
- 7:03:58that's going to help you stay focused.
- 7:04:00Number four, stop networking. All right?
- 7:04:02Now, this is a really, really important
- 7:04:04point. Now, it's not that I even have
- 7:04:06some big problem with networking
- 7:04:07overall. That's actually not my point.
- 7:04:09It's more that there are there are
- 7:04:11seasons of life, right? In the
- 7:04:13beginning, you're in exploration. I
- 7:04:15grabbed this from Nval and I really love
- 7:04:16it. Later on, you get into exploitation,
- 7:04:19which is where you go allin, right? And
- 7:04:21so, the thing is is that in the
- 7:04:22beginning, you're tasting lots of stuff.
- 7:04:24you're trying to figure out what you are
- 7:04:26good at or have some proclivity towards.
- 7:04:29When you have that proclivity, then it
- 7:04:30becomes very clear now is the time to
- 7:04:33cut everything else so that we can focus
- 7:04:35and go deep. Right? So, you go broad in
- 7:04:37the beginning so that you can figure out
- 7:04:39what you to go deep on. The broad period
- 7:04:41that you're in is never the period where
- 7:04:43you're going to make money. Like this is
- 7:04:44the part you have to get. I say from the
- 7:04:46beginning of when I started until I
- 7:04:47really graduated from it was about 5
- 7:04:49years. It's less of a binary, more of a
- 7:04:52continuum. In the beginning, you taste
- 7:04:53lots of stuff and then you just have to
- 7:04:54because in the beginning, you have to
- 7:04:55say yes to things. You have to say yes
- 7:04:56because you're so bad. You're so scared.
- 7:04:58You never want to say yes. But you learn
- 7:05:00to say yes a little bit and then you say
- 7:05:02yes more and then you say yes more. And
- 7:05:03then very quickly you learn to say yes
- 7:05:05and get overwhelmed. And so the only way
- 7:05:07out of this yes trap is you have to
- 7:05:09start practicing to say no. And if
- 7:05:11you're like, wait a second, that means
- 7:05:12that I have to change what I do. Welcome
- 7:05:14to entrepreneurship. Like you have to
- 7:05:16learn, you have to evolve, you have to
- 7:05:17grow. So let me give you a very tactical
- 7:05:19example. So, if you're debating between
- 7:05:20going to a networking event, right, or
- 7:05:22like a lunch with some dude who's like,
- 7:05:24"Hey, we should collaborate. We should
- 7:05:25synergize. We should maybe trade ideas.
- 7:05:27Let me pick your brain, whatever, right?
- 7:05:28And if you're picking between any of
- 7:05:30those things and working, choose the
- 7:05:32work because when the work works out,
- 7:05:34the people will still be there to take
- 7:05:36your call. But if you never do the work,
- 7:05:39no amount of networking will get the
- 7:05:41work done for you." And the bonus or
- 7:05:43negative bonus here is that if you don't
- 7:05:44get the work done, they're not going to
- 7:05:46take your call in the future. And so
- 7:05:47they're willing to take the call today
- 7:05:48with whatever small amount of success
- 7:05:50that you have. But if you lose that
- 7:05:51success because you get distracted,
- 7:05:53they're not going to take the call in
- 7:05:54the future. That door will be open. I
- 7:05:56promise. And not only will that door be
- 7:05:58open, 100 other doors will open for you
- 7:06:00if you win. During this season, losers
- 7:06:03congregate. Winners isolate. If everyone
- 7:06:06was supposed to win, they would have
- 7:06:07made podiums bigger. The top of the
- 7:06:09mountain isn't supposed to fit a lot of
- 7:06:10people. It's normal. The air is harder
- 7:06:12to breathe. And the thing is is if all
- 7:06:14of this seems antithetical or different
- 7:06:16than what you've heard or what other
- 7:06:17people around you are experiencing, ask
- 7:06:19yourself, is that do those people have
- 7:06:21the lives you want? A great way to make
- 7:06:23a mistake is to ask someone else's idea
- 7:06:27about your idea who has no idea. When
- 7:06:30you make this transition from going from
- 7:06:32the exploration period to the
- 7:06:34exploitation phase, you go from many
- 7:06:37looser connections to a very few tight
- 7:06:39ones. I tend to be very transactional as
- 7:06:41a person, but I think we all are and
- 7:06:43some people are just open about it.
- 7:06:44Everybody on some level does some sort
- 7:06:46of math in their head of like the
- 7:06:47person, this person in my life, I get
- 7:06:48more benefits than I have costs. But the
- 7:06:50thing is is that if you want to raise
- 7:06:51the standard of your life, you have to
- 7:06:52raise the standard of the people who you
- 7:06:54surround yourself with. Because the
- 7:06:55fastest way to change your life is to
- 7:06:57change who you're friends with. Because
- 7:06:59that reference group is ultimately going
- 7:07:01to be what you compare yourself to. And
- 7:07:03so if you change who you compare
- 7:07:04yourself to, all of a sudden you will
- 7:07:06create deprivation around the difference
- 7:07:07between where they're at and where
- 7:07:09you're at. The only way that people let
- 7:07:11you into circles that you don't deserve
- 7:07:12to be in is work ethic. There is no
- 7:07:14other way. It is the universal currency
- 7:07:16of respect across cultures, across time
- 7:07:18periods, across cohorts, across
- 7:07:20generations. An old man will respect a
- 7:07:22young man who hustles and they will
- 7:07:24always be willing to give time to
- 7:07:26somebody who they think will execute.
- 7:07:27Like this is that was my secret and it
- 7:07:30still is my secret. Like I I network
- 7:07:31with people who are above who you know I
- 7:07:33punch above my weight class in terms of
- 7:07:34the people that I'm connected with
- 7:07:35because they know that I'll do the work
- 7:07:37and so they don't feel like they're
- 7:07:38wasting their time by helping cuz the
- 7:07:39thing is a lot of people are actually
- 7:07:40very happy to help you. What they aren't
- 7:07:42happy to do is waste their time helping
- 7:07:45you when you actually don't help
- 7:07:46yourself. And so I've shed friends at
- 7:07:48every season of my life and my close
- 7:07:51circle has always been very small like
- 7:07:53very small. The thing is is that I think
- 7:07:55of my life in kind of seasons, right?
- 7:07:57And so you're going to have friends for
- 7:07:58this season and maybe you keep them for
- 7:08:00life but maybe you don't. And I think
- 7:08:02giving yourself permission to say like
- 7:08:03that was that season and they were
- 7:08:05amazing friends for the objectives that
- 7:08:06I had then and then my objectives change
- 7:08:08and it's not really fair to them to say
- 7:08:09hey I'm completely changing all the
- 7:08:11things that I'm doing. You have to still
- 7:08:12be friends with me. It might not make
- 7:08:13sense for them. And so not keeping this
- 7:08:16expectation over them has helped me kind
- 7:08:17of like free myself of that so that I
- 7:08:19can reinvest the time that I have in
- 7:08:21friends that I think will help me get to
- 7:08:23where I'm trying to go next. Okay. So,
- 7:08:24if we're taking these big bets and we're
- 7:08:26we're following something that we're
- 7:08:28good at rather than that we're
- 7:08:29passionate about and we're not going to
- 7:08:30get distracted, we're doubling down on
- 7:08:32one thing and we're turning off these
- 7:08:34other things that in the beginning we
- 7:08:35were exploring the the little lunches,
- 7:08:37the little networking because we know
- 7:08:38that if we just succeed at this one
- 7:08:39thing, all of those doors will be open.
- 7:08:41What do we do to make money? So, let me
- 7:08:42give you a money rule. Money loves
- 7:08:45speed. And this will relate back to the
- 7:08:48asymmetric bets. By the time you have
- 7:08:50all the information, the opportunity is
- 7:08:52gone. Sometimes you just have to make
- 7:08:54your bet. And it's almost always faster
- 7:08:56to make a decision, then make a mistake,
- 7:08:59and then correct that mistake than it is
- 7:09:01to painstakingly deliberate on the
- 7:09:03decision. If you know how long it would
- 7:09:05take you to fix something, if you're
- 7:09:06wrong, then just make your best bet cuz
- 7:09:09you can always fix it later. And so said
- 7:09:11differently, if it takes you 5 minutes
- 7:09:13to decide and then 10 minutes to fix
- 7:09:15something, don't take two hours to
- 7:09:17decide because you could just do it. And
- 7:09:19if you're right, you immediately are
- 7:09:20moving forward 5 minutes later. And if
- 7:09:22you're wrong, you're moving forward 15
- 7:09:23minutes later. But either way, it's
- 7:09:25going to take you less time than trying
- 7:09:26to assume that you're going to know
- 7:09:27everything because you're just not. You
- 7:09:28have to get a grip with uncertainty.
- 7:09:30Like uncertainty is the job. Like, if
- 7:09:33you want certainty, don't try and go
- 7:09:35after your dreams. Because the thing is
- 7:09:36is that the only way to go after a
- 7:09:38certain dream is to go after an old
- 7:09:39dream. And if you go after an old dream
- 7:09:40that's already happened, you're trying
- 7:09:41to fulfill something that will not
- 7:09:43happen again. And so, you're either
- 7:09:44going to do the work or you're going to
- 7:09:46sit around wishing you'd done the work.
- 7:09:48And one of the things that took me a
- 7:09:49very long time to to understand was that
- 7:09:51the things that dragged me down were not
- 7:09:53the things that I thought they were.
- 7:09:54Because the heaviest things in life
- 7:09:56aren't iron or gold, but they are unmade
- 7:09:58decisions. They're the things that weigh
- 7:10:00us down. They take up all of our
- 7:10:02attention, all of our brain power. And
- 7:10:04so, right now, there's probably a
- 7:10:06handful of decisions that you know you
- 7:10:07need to make that you're just not. If
- 7:10:09you want to feel yourself go so much
- 7:10:11faster than you ever have, just decide.
- 7:10:14So few decisions in life actually are
- 7:10:16irreversible. Even the ones that people
- 7:10:18pretend are irreversible. What if I
- 7:10:20should I buy this car? Should I buy this
- 7:10:22car? You could buy it and then flip it.
- 7:10:23It's not like you can't sell it again,
- 7:10:25right? And so the real cost of the
- 7:10:26decision is the delta between what I
- 7:10:28could buy it for and what I can sell it
- 7:10:29for. Okay. Well, how much does it cost
- 7:10:31me waiting 6 months to do this? Probably
- 7:10:33a lot. And if I need that car to to, you
- 7:10:36know, or a truck so that I can like go
- 7:10:37to job sites or pick up clients or
- 7:10:39whatever it is, then like I am losing
- 7:10:41all of the time that I'm waiting to
- 7:10:43decide. And I'm telling you where people
- 7:10:46slow down is at the decision process
- 7:10:48more than at the doing process. Doing
- 7:10:50usually takes very little time. It's the
- 7:10:52deciding that people that bogs people
- 7:10:53down in quagmire, right? They just get
- 7:10:55stuck. They they feel like they're
- 7:10:57trudging through mud because they just
- 7:10:58hit these walls and all of a sudden
- 7:11:00there's no action because they're just
- 7:11:01thinking, they're planning. And I think
- 7:11:03I had to get comfortable with the idea
- 7:11:04that there's so many variables that I do
- 7:11:07not know. That I actually have to get
- 7:11:08comfortable with the idea that I just
- 7:11:10should test and learn and I'll learn way
- 7:11:13faster than if I try and deliberate. And
- 7:11:15that has happened more times in my life
- 7:11:16than not. I would say that approach has
- 7:11:19served me with bigger and bigger
- 7:11:20decisions in life. Like I have I've made
- 7:11:22monster mistakes, but the bigger mistake
- 7:11:24that I would have made is just not being
- 7:11:25able to make decisions to begin with.
- 7:11:27And so you can move through life at
- 7:11:29seven times the rate of other people by
- 7:11:31simply changing when you say you're
- 7:11:33going to make a decision from the end of
- 7:11:35the week to the end of the day. And if
- 7:11:37you want to move even faster than that,
- 7:11:38you can decide at the end of the hour.
- 7:11:40And if you move faster than that, guess
- 7:11:41what you could do? Decide now. And so
- 7:11:43sometimes like my team has seen me do
- 7:11:45this. Well, we're like, "Okay, so um you
- 7:11:47know, we've got to we got to make this
- 7:11:48decision." And people are always like,
- 7:11:49"Yeah, let's kick that to next, you
- 7:11:51know, meeting or let's let's circle
- 7:11:52back. Let's let's go offline for that."
- 7:11:54It's like, "No, let's confront. Let's
- 7:11:55just choose. Let's pick. Which vendor
- 7:11:57are we going with? Which website design
- 7:11:59do we like? What headline are we going
- 7:12:00to use? What's the ad hook that we're
- 7:12:02going to go with? Just pick. That's why
- 7:12:04all of this stuff comes down to bets. If
- 7:12:06you want to have a future that you want,
- 7:12:08you have to get comfortable with risk.
- 7:12:10So, if money loves speed, where are some
- 7:12:12of the money potholes? So, number six,
- 7:12:14pay off your debt. Now, I'm going to hit
- 7:12:17you with something you probably haven't
- 7:12:18thought of before, which is there are
- 7:12:19many kinds of debt. There's obviously
- 7:12:21financial debt, but the biggest and most
- 7:12:23expensive debt is ignorance debt. It's
- 7:12:25the cost of what you do not know but
- 7:12:27should. And to be clear, I still pay off
- 7:12:30ignorance debt every day. It's the debt
- 7:12:32in skills and knowledge that I should
- 7:12:34know to get faster and further to where
- 7:12:37I'm trying to go, but I don't. And so, I
- 7:12:39have to just fail until I get this
- 7:12:41knowledge. But the thing is is that if I
- 7:12:43don't fail, I will never get it. I am
- 7:12:45willing to pay in looking bad, in money
- 7:12:48lost, in time lost, in people judging me
- 7:12:52to make bets. And so I like this
- 7:12:54perspective on experts, which is that an
- 7:12:56expert is just somebody who's made all
- 7:12:57the mistakes you can make in a very
- 7:12:58narrow field. You have to learn how to
- 7:13:00lose before you can learn how to win.
- 7:13:03And the first rule of losing is that you
- 7:13:05didn't lose, you just learned. You paid
- 7:13:07down the most expensive debt. So then
- 7:13:09the question is, if you know that you
- 7:13:10have to pay this debt off, why aren't
- 7:13:12you? And I think it's because you don't
- 7:13:14realize how expensive not paying it off
- 7:13:16really is. And so know the price of
- 7:13:20inaction. Do you think that the reason
- 7:13:22that you're in the situation you're in
- 7:13:24right now is because you've struggled to
- 7:13:25decide in the past that you've gotten
- 7:13:27all the way up to the edge, you've
- 7:13:28gotten all the way up to the precipice,
- 7:13:29all the way to the front of the line,
- 7:13:30and then you choose not to. And so the
- 7:13:32question is, how many times have you run
- 7:13:34that cycle? How many times have you
- 7:13:35thought through this decision and then
- 7:13:37not done something about it? And is the
- 7:13:38life you have you want as a result of
- 7:13:40those actions? Because maybe the best
- 7:13:42thing you can possibly do is maybe see
- 7:13:44this and then just choose to make that
- 7:13:46call because not making that call has
- 7:13:47gotten you where you're at. If you
- 7:13:49genuinely believe that you're going to
- 7:13:50do this sooner or later, right? Make
- 7:13:52this bet, make this call, whatever,
- 7:13:53sooner or later, then you might as well
- 7:13:55do it sooner so you can start enjoying
- 7:13:57the benefits now cuz you're going to
- 7:13:58enjoy the benefits either way. But why
- 7:14:00would you want to delay the benefits of
- 7:14:02taking action? The real real is because
- 7:14:03you want to delay the costs of potential
- 7:14:06failure. Real quick, I have the most
- 7:14:07amazing offer for you, which is all
- 7:14:10three of my books for free. Uh,
- 7:14:13[clears throat] just cover the shipping.
- 7:14:14I think it's like five or six bucks in
- 7:14:15shipping uh per book. um you get the
- 7:14:18actual hardback shipped to you. And the
- 7:14:20reason for that is because some of you
- 7:14:21guys may know we had 3.6 million copies
- 7:14:23that were donated from entrepreneurs.
- 7:14:25And I'm doing my part to give the books
- 7:14:27away, but I'm also giving the other two
- 7:14:29books uh to anyone who want them who
- 7:14:32choose to redeem it. All right. Last
- 7:14:33time I made this offer, uh it sold out
- 7:14:36in like 10 days. Uh so I did buy a lot
- 7:14:38more books. Um so if you see this, you
- 7:14:40know, go check it out. Go grab them. Um
- 7:14:41these are obviously while supplies last.
- 7:14:43um because this lives in the video
- 7:14:45forever and if you get there and it's
- 7:14:47not there then you know don't get upset.
- 7:14:48All right, back to the video. Let's say
- 7:14:51you have a reason why you haven't taken
- 7:14:53action, whatever that is, right? Just
- 7:14:55imagine in your mind like it's some
- 7:14:56visual thing. Realistically, it's
- 7:14:58probably one or two voices in your head
- 7:15:01and you can probably think about whose
- 7:15:03voice that is and it might not be yours.
- 7:15:05And so, who is the person that you're
- 7:15:08choosing to not live your entire life
- 7:15:09for? Whose judgment do you care that
- 7:15:11much about? And so I will tell you the
- 7:15:13story. I almost didn't sell Gym Launch
- 7:15:16because I thought that $46 million was
- 7:15:18not enough to impress a specific
- 7:15:21colleague of mine. Real talk. I was very
- 7:15:23very hesitant to sell the company. And
- 7:15:25the main reason is cuz I thought that
- 7:15:26they would think that that wasn't that
- 7:15:28that impressive. And when I thought
- 7:15:29about that, I was like, "Wow." I was
- 7:15:32like, and this is this wasn't family.
- 7:15:34This wasn't friends. This was just kind
- 7:15:36of a colleague that I respected. when I
- 7:15:38was able to really listen to the voice,
- 7:15:40whose voice does this belong to and what
- 7:15:43are they saying? And most importantly,
- 7:15:45is that the person who I want to give
- 7:15:47control over my entire life? And once I
- 7:15:49saw that, I was like, well, that's
- 7:15:50ridiculous. I don't care about this.
- 7:15:52They're usually subconscious. Like, you
- 7:15:54don't notice them unless you listen for
- 7:15:55the voice, unless you name the voice. Am
- 7:15:57I really going to let John be the reason
- 7:15:59that I don't get married to this girl?
- 7:16:00Is Joe really going to be the reason
- 7:16:02that I don't raise my prices? Is Sarah
- 7:16:05really the reason why I'm not going to
- 7:16:06sell this thing? Ridiculous. But people
- 7:16:08do it, myself included, every day. And
- 7:16:10look, this isn't going to be easy,
- 7:16:12right? Building these skills, losing
- 7:16:15friends, taking bets, taking losses, you
- 7:16:17might find yourself stuck and then
- 7:16:19blaming your previous experiences. Which
- 7:16:21is why number eight, get over yourself.
- 7:16:25Everyone's childhood was difficult. Get
- 7:16:27over it. And if you want to win the
- 7:16:28award for hardest childhood,
- 7:16:30congratulations. I'll give it to you.
- 7:16:31You have the hardest childhood. You win.
- 7:16:33Feel better, right? No one cares about
- 7:16:35what happened to you then. only what you
- 7:16:37can make happen now. And so the only
- 7:16:39person that's satisfied with whatever
- 7:16:40that reason is is you. And the everyone
- 7:16:42else calls that reason an excuse. And at
- 7:16:45the end of the day age, you want to get
- 7:16:46to your life and have everyone be like,
- 7:16:47you know what, he wasn't successful, but
- 7:16:49he had a lot of really good reasons.
- 7:16:50Wouldn't it be so much more powerful to
- 7:16:52say he had all these reasons he
- 7:16:53shouldn't have been successful but was
- 7:16:55anyways? Like those reasons actually
- 7:16:57give you even more fuel because you
- 7:16:59become a stronger story to everyone
- 7:17:02else. Like no one cares when the silver
- 7:17:04spoon kid succeeds really. And so all of
- 7:17:06the reasons that you can normally tell
- 7:17:08yourself of why you shouldn't do it are
- 7:17:09sometimes the best reasons of why you
- 7:17:11should. If you had disadvantages, I
- 7:17:13agree with you. Like you're right. It's
- 7:17:15harder to be successful if this thing
- 7:17:16happened to you or if you're born with X
- 7:17:19or you're in this gender or this race or
- 7:17:21you have this birth deformity or you
- 7:17:23speak a different language or you're
- 7:17:24born in a different country or you had
- 7:17:25abuse, whatever. So the main point is
- 7:17:28despite the disadvantage, you only have
- 7:17:30one choice. What are you going to do?
- 7:17:32You can take action anyway and become
- 7:17:34proof to other people like you, your
- 7:17:36people who were also born into your
- 7:17:38situation, whether it was abuse, whether
- 7:17:39it was your gender, whether it was your
- 7:17:41your race, whe your country, and you can
- 7:17:43prove to them or prove to yourself that
- 7:17:45you can overcome it and that they can
- 7:17:46overcome it too. Or you can do what the
- 7:17:48vast majority of people do, is that they
- 7:17:50protect their ego and blame and
- 7:17:52complain. And to be clear, this is not a
- 7:17:54pulpit. You can do whatever you want. I
- 7:17:55support your choice. Go you. But only
- 7:17:57one of those decisions is going to make
- 7:17:58you better. And likely only one of those
- 7:18:00decisions is going to get you closer to
- 7:18:01where you want to go. Because at the end
- 7:18:02of the day, here's the TLDDR. Losers
- 7:18:04define themselves by what has happened
- 7:18:06to them. Winners define themselves by
- 7:18:08what they can make happen despite what's
- 7:18:10happened to them. And so where some
- 7:18:12person sees an excuse, another person
- 7:18:13sees an origin story. Like you look at
- 7:18:15every every champion, every hero, every
- 7:18:18comic book, they all have hard pasts.
- 7:18:21And so you having a hard past, whatever
- 7:18:23that is for you or some disadvantage,
- 7:18:26just makes you like every other
- 7:18:27superhero who ends up, you know,
- 7:18:29changing their lives. And I actually
- 7:18:30love this. I heard this from Joe Rogan,
- 7:18:31so this is not mine. Every single one of
- 7:18:33us can today wake up like it's the first
- 7:18:35day of a video game. Like you just like
- 7:18:37got transported into this body and
- 7:18:39you're like, "Okay, look around. I have
- 7:18:41a wife. I have some kids. I have a job I
- 7:18:43hate or I have a business I don't like
- 7:18:45or I have some bet that I I have this
- 7:18:47thing inside of me that I I know I can
- 7:18:48do more but I'm not. you have all this
- 7:18:50stuff that's around you and now you can
- 7:18:52choose like everything else behind you.
- 7:18:54You could just have today be your spawn
- 7:18:56point. And so when you're in a video
- 7:18:57game, it's easy to just forsake all that
- 7:18:59stuff because you don't have this
- 7:19:00emotional connection to it. But the
- 7:19:01thing is is that like the action needs
- 7:19:03to be taken either way. So whatever
- 7:19:04frame of mind you need to be in in order
- 7:19:06to do it, then do that. All right. So
- 7:19:07once we have this head trash out of the
- 7:19:09way, then we have to get back to back to
- 7:19:10business, if you will. So what's the
- 7:19:12next thing that we have to do? We have
- 7:19:14to solve bigger problems.
- 7:19:16If you want to make more money in your
- 7:19:1820s and 30s, solve bigger problems.
- 7:19:20Right? If you want to make a million
- 7:19:22dollars, you have to be willing to
- 7:19:23endure a million dollars worth of pain.
- 7:19:25If you want to make $10 million, you
- 7:19:26have to endure $10 million worth of
- 7:19:28pain. And here's the thing is that most
- 7:19:30people have never endured that. And so
- 7:19:31when they start getting into it, the
- 7:19:32thing is is that the nature of the pain
- 7:19:34changes. And so in the beginning, the
- 7:19:36pain is I don't know what I'm doing.
- 7:19:38Later the pain is people judging me. And
- 7:19:40later the pain is lawsuits. And a lot of
- 7:19:43the pain is just not knowing what the
- 7:19:45hell you're doing at whatever stage of
- 7:19:46business you're at because that never
- 7:19:48goes away. And so not knowing is a
- 7:19:51constant. So trying to solve for not
- 7:19:53knowing is silly cuz it's never going to
- 7:19:55happen. And so this is why you have to
- 7:19:57get comfortable with uncertainty. You
- 7:19:58have to make uncertainty your friend. If
- 7:20:00we're going to solve problems, right, we
- 7:20:02might as well pick big ones. And I'll
- 7:20:03give you a great a great analogy that I
- 7:20:05got from Steven Schwarzman who's the
- 7:20:06founder of Blackstone. He said big goals
- 7:20:08and small goals are usually just about
- 7:20:10as hard. A common VC saying is that
- 7:20:13having a really successful restaurant,
- 7:20:14you might have to work 80 hours a week
- 7:20:16and manage all these different people to
- 7:20:18have a really successful local
- 7:20:19restaurant. And you might also have to
- 7:20:21manage all these people and do all this
- 7:20:23other stuff if you want to build a
- 7:20:25billion-dollar unicorn. Both of those
- 7:20:27things are hard. And so if it's going to
- 7:20:28be hard regardless, you might as well go
- 7:20:31big. And actually, it's been a very like
- 7:20:33that is a very helpful frame for me
- 7:20:34because one of the beliefs that I have
- 7:20:35about business and life is that
- 7:20:37suffering is a constant. Like I have to
- 7:20:39remind myself this on a regular basis,
- 7:20:41which is that if we are growing, I am in
- 7:20:43pain. If we're plateaued, I am in pain.
- 7:20:46And if we are declining, I'm in pain.
- 7:20:47[clears throat] Which means that I am
- 7:20:48pretty much always in pain. And so to
- 7:20:50think that there's something wrong with
- 7:20:52pain misses the point of how this works.
- 7:20:55It is a constant. And if it's a
- 7:20:56constant, we don't even need to think
- 7:20:58about it. It shouldn't be a reason to do
- 7:20:59something or not do something cuz it's
- 7:21:00just always there. Competition for big
- 7:21:03goals, believe it or not, is actually
- 7:21:04much rarer. It's thinner air. People
- 7:21:06believe that it's so unrealistic that
- 7:21:08they don't shoot for it, which actually
- 7:21:10makes fewer people there to compete
- 7:21:11against. And so, it is probably harder
- 7:21:13in some ways to have a local restaurant
- 7:21:15that is really successful than it is to
- 7:21:17have a, you know, big business. And what
- 7:21:20I found is that most problems are
- 7:21:22solvable, which means that most things
- 7:21:24are knowable. And the reason that you
- 7:21:26probably haven't gotten to where you
- 7:21:28want to go is cuz you haven't actually
- 7:21:30started trying it. And so, you're going
- 7:21:32to have to be obsessive about it. And I
- 7:21:34think one of the big things that I
- 7:21:35didn't understand was just how obsessive
- 7:21:37I was going to have to be. Is normal to
- 7:21:40not be like your other normal friends.
- 7:21:42If you want to have extraordinary
- 7:21:44outcomes, if you think about the
- 7:21:45reverse, it wouldn't make sense if we do
- 7:21:47the same things as our normal friends
- 7:21:48and somehow get something different.
- 7:21:49It's a positive indicator. It's a green
- 7:21:51flag that you're living a different life
- 7:21:53than everyone around you. Like I had a
- 7:21:55conversation with my EAS this morning.
- 7:21:56They were like, "Man, I feel like if you
- 7:21:58were a normal person," that's what they
- 7:21:59said to me. They're like, "I feel like
- 7:22:00if you were a normal person, you would
- 7:22:02drive this kind of car." I like looked
- 7:22:04at them and I was like, "So basically,
- 7:22:05if I were not me, I would do things that
- 7:22:08not me would do. Right now, it would
- 7:22:10make sense that you're going to do
- 7:22:12things that normal people won't do
- 7:22:14because you're trying to not have the
- 7:22:15same outcome as them." 10. Obsession is
- 7:22:19the ticket of entry. It's the price of
- 7:22:22entry. And the thing is is that
- 7:22:23obsession isn't really obsession. It's
- 7:22:25actually just trying and no one else
- 7:22:26tries. Like that's the real real is that
- 7:22:29normal people call what I consider sane
- 7:22:32people to be obsessed. But sane people,
- 7:22:35which is what I consider myself,
- 7:22:37consider everyone else insane because
- 7:22:39they do nothing and waste their lives.
- 7:22:41And so we have to be comfortable with
- 7:22:44reasoning from first principles of like,
- 7:22:46I am only going to live here for not
- 7:22:48that long and I'm only going to have a
- 7:22:49certain amount of hours to do the stuff
- 7:22:50that I want to do. Why on earth would I
- 7:22:53not do it because of some face noise
- 7:22:56that some person, some other, you know,
- 7:22:59advanced ape is going to say to me about
- 7:23:02them having a preference about how I'm
- 7:23:04living my life. And so you can boil
- 7:23:06almost all insults or judgments down to
- 7:23:10this statement. And I think like I hear
- 7:23:11this, I translate it when I hear hate.
- 7:23:13You do not live your life in a way that
- 7:23:14I would prefer. So they're like, you
- 7:23:16know, you shouldn't. I do not live my
- 7:23:17life in a way that you would prefer. And
- 7:23:18that's okay because that's why you live
- 7:23:20a life that you prefer and not a life
- 7:23:22that I would prefer. And that's why you
- 7:23:23live your life and I live my life. And
- 7:23:24so people just get so triggered by this.
- 7:23:27So when people hate on you, it usually
- 7:23:29means that they're jealous and believe
- 7:23:31that you are undeserving of some part of
- 7:23:33your life. And so to be clear, it's not
- 7:23:35that they're jealous of your whole life.
- 7:23:36They might be jealous of the attention
- 7:23:38you get. They might be jealous of maybe
- 7:23:40just the money you make, but not the way
- 7:23:41you look. Or they might be jealous of
- 7:23:42the the body you have, right? And
- 7:23:44they're going to be like, "Ah, you're
- 7:23:45chewing to that food, right?" Or, you
- 7:23:47know, "You work too much." or whatever
- 7:23:48the whatever the little snide remark is,
- 7:23:50right? But what they basically think is
- 7:23:52that life has unjustly given you the
- 7:23:55benefits that they believe they
- 7:23:56rightfully deserve. And they might be
- 7:23:58right, but life isn't fair. Here's the
- 7:24:00thing. People who obsess about work life
- 7:24:03balance are typically mediocre at both.
- 7:24:05And so obsessed people apply their
- 7:24:07obsession to everything and just call it
- 7:24:09life. And they also don't consider
- 7:24:10themselves obsessed. They just consider
- 7:24:12everyone else unobsessed and just plain
- 7:24:15and banal. And so I get criticized all
- 7:24:17the time for work life balance. People
- 7:24:19say like, Alex, you don't have any
- 7:24:20hobbies, right? I don't want any. I
- 7:24:22don't want any. They're basically saying
- 7:24:23yet again, you live your life in a way
- 7:24:25that I would not prefer. If I were in
- 7:24:26your position, I would live life
- 7:24:27differently, right? And that's why
- 7:24:28you're not in my position. So why should
- 7:24:30I sacrifice the things that I prefer to
- 7:24:31do in order to do the things that I
- 7:24:33don't want to do, right? Just to make
- 7:24:34your definition of work life balance
- 7:24:35happy, which I don't accept. So like
- 7:24:37work life balance is a wonderful goal. I
- 7:24:40have no hate for it. It's not going to
- 7:24:41happen if you want to be the best. Like
- 7:24:43you've probably heard the, you know,
- 7:24:44work smart not hard, right? That only
- 7:24:47works when you're competing against
- 7:24:48people who are not smart. If you compete
- 7:24:51against other smart people, the only
- 7:24:52thing you will have left is to work
- 7:24:54hard. If you work smart, not hard, you
- 7:24:56will get beaten by someone who works
- 7:24:57smart and hard. And if I don't know
- 7:24:59about you, I would rather be that person
- 7:25:00cuz at the end of the day, I would like
- 7:25:02to just win. And that is point 11, which
- 7:25:04is work hard and smart. If you
- 7:25:07extrapolate out what a normal life is
- 7:25:09like, right? Maybe someone makes, you
- 7:25:11know, a million dollars or $2 million
- 7:25:13over the span of their entire career,
- 7:25:14right? 40 years plus. I think there is
- 7:25:16just a certain amount of work that must
- 7:25:17be done to generate income. And so what
- 7:25:19I would rather do is just take that 40
- 7:25:20years and just cram it into four and
- 7:25:23then have the other 36 years of my life
- 7:25:26to do whatever I want with resources far
- 7:25:28beyond what I would be able to do there.
- 7:25:30And so I remember Ila uh had this very
- 7:25:33early conversation with I think it was
- 7:25:35our first date. She said she's like I
- 7:25:36just want to help people, right? It's
- 7:25:37like that was her whole thing. And I was
- 7:25:39like do you think it'd be possible for
- 7:25:40you to help people and to make money?
- 7:25:42And she was like well yeah. And I was
- 7:25:44like, "Okay, do you think you could help
- 7:25:45more people if you made more money?" And
- 7:25:48she was like, "Yeah." And in that
- 7:25:50conversation, she shifted from being
- 7:25:51what I would consider a bleeding heart
- 7:25:53of just like doing everything like just
- 7:25:55trying to just just help every single
- 7:25:57person. But the thing is is you're li
- 7:25:58your resources are so limited. You can't
- 7:26:00do much. And so if you want to help a
- 7:26:02lot of people, it's like you got to
- 7:26:03learn the game. And the thing is to win
- 7:26:05that game, it's like you probably have
- 7:26:06to outwork people, a lot of people. And
- 7:26:08you have to be called names by people
- 7:26:10who live lives that you don't like. I
- 7:26:11want to be very clear about this. When I
- 7:26:13say work hard and smart, it doesn't mean
- 7:26:15it's going to be exciting. So 12 here is
- 7:26:19accept boredom.
- 7:26:21Like if you want to be creative, you
- 7:26:23must first learn to be bored. If you
- 7:26:25want to achieve a goal, you'll either
- 7:26:27have to accept boredom or pain. And the
- 7:26:29bigger the goal, the more of both you're
- 7:26:30going to get. I have this great visual
- 7:26:32in my head about how winning works,
- 7:26:34right? And so you imagine you have this
- 7:26:36this marathon, right, that you're
- 7:26:37running. So you've got this starting
- 7:26:39line here, right? Start. And then you've
- 7:26:41got this big race, right? And then
- 7:26:43you've got a finish line over here.
- 7:26:44Tada. Finish. Now, when you've seen a
- 7:26:47race, where do people gather? They
- 7:26:49gather here. And they gather here. So,
- 7:26:51here's the question. Where does the
- 7:26:52winning happen? On your own. Cuz no one
- 7:26:55cheers for you not drinking for a day or
- 7:26:58not smoking, you know, on a lawn drive
- 7:26:59if you're trying to quit or not
- 7:27:00overeating for one night or skipping out
- 7:27:02on going to the club with the boys. No
- 7:27:04one cheers for that. No workout or meal
- 7:27:07is ever impressive on its own. And so
- 7:27:10the reason so few people understand
- 7:27:11success or at least achieve it in my
- 7:27:13opinion is that consistency never looks
- 7:27:15impressive in the moment only at the
- 7:27:17end. Because if you think about how
- 7:27:18consist like it's very difficult to
- 7:27:20visualize consistency because you can
- 7:27:22only see someone do something once,
- 7:27:24right? You see a snapshot of someone
- 7:27:26take a shot or hit a backhand. The only
- 7:27:29way that you can actually witness
- 7:27:30consistency is working with people who
- 7:27:33are consistent. Because the thing that
- 7:27:35you have to see is that person show up
- 7:27:37every single day. Like someone could
- 7:27:38show a workout of me working out and
- 7:27:40someone else might be like, "Okay, well,
- 7:27:42I mean that's a workout. Maybe I should
- 7:27:44kind of work out like that." And sure,
- 7:27:45there's a level of intensity that might
- 7:27:46be there or form and things like that,
- 7:27:47whatever. But the thing that people
- 7:27:49won't see is it's very hard to witness
- 7:27:5120 years cuz you have to be there for 20
- 7:27:53years. And this is why I think so few
- 7:27:54people are able to internalize
- 7:27:56consistency, which is the most important
- 7:27:58success trait, because it's very hard to
- 7:28:00lose if you show up every day. It's very
- 7:28:02hard. And showing up every day is
- 7:28:04boring. And so if we're willing to
- 7:28:05accept boredom, the next thing that
- 7:28:07we're going to have to be willing to
- 7:28:08accept is sacrifice.
- 7:28:10We have to give up some things to get
- 7:28:12others. And so like at the end of the
- 7:28:14day, like all we have are trade-offs. We
- 7:28:16have what we have and what we want. And
- 7:28:18the question is, what are the things
- 7:28:19that you currently have? Are you willing
- 7:28:20to trade for the things you want? And I
- 7:28:22think this such a perfect way of
- 7:28:23thinking about it. Like you have
- 7:28:25everything in your life right now that
- 7:28:26you're going to have to trade. Like
- 7:28:28everyone trades. Everyone starts even
- 7:28:29when you had at zero. You have things in
- 7:28:31your life and you have to trade those
- 7:28:33things for things that you currently
- 7:28:35want but don't have. There's no perfect
- 7:28:37way to live your 20s or your 30s, right?
- 7:28:39You either live them up and become an
- 7:28:40underskilled 30 or 40-year-old or you
- 7:28:42work them up and become an underlived 30
- 7:28:45or 40-year-old. You just have to figure
- 7:28:46out which you'd rather be and accept the
- 7:28:48trade-offs and know that there are no
- 7:28:49doovers. And that's okay. And when we're
- 7:28:51really thinking about sacrifice right
- 7:28:54now, no human will ever get more than 24
- 7:28:56hours per day. We all have that, right?
- 7:28:58And so fundamentally everything that you
- 7:29:01spend your time on that is not you
- 7:29:04pursuing your goal you are determining
- 7:29:06is more important than your goal. And so
- 7:29:08if you look at what you did every single
- 7:29:10one of these hours and then you actually
- 7:29:12surface it and say you know what
- 7:29:13watching Netflix you know doom scrolling
- 7:29:16Tik Tok and Instagram hanging around
- 7:29:18doing nothing surfing the web or
- 7:29:20whatever it is that people do these days
- 7:29:21that is what's actually more important
- 7:29:23to you based on your behavior. And so,
- 7:29:25is it really a sacrifice to give that up
- 7:29:28for what you want? Because the thing is
- 7:29:30is that a year from now, you're not
- 7:29:31going to look back on today and be like,
- 7:29:32"Man, I'm so glad." Like, those clips
- 7:29:35that I watched really changed things for
- 7:29:36me. They you probably won't even
- 7:29:38remember any of the clips that you saw.
- 7:29:40They did a great research study on this
- 7:29:41where they did short form versus long
- 7:29:43form even and people remember like 11%.
- 7:29:46Like 24 hours later, it was a tiny
- 7:29:49percentage. And so we have to accept
- 7:29:51that the things that we spending our
- 7:29:53time on most of the time is just wasting
- 7:29:55our time on. And so I think Senica said
- 7:29:57this, it's not that we don't have enough
- 7:29:59time, it's that we waste the time we
- 7:30:01have. I come back to this which is like
- 7:30:03is it really a sacrifice or you finally
- 7:30:05just saying I believe this is my
- 7:30:08priority and therefore all of these
- 7:30:09things that are not helping me pursue
- 7:30:11that I'm now going to trade out for
- 7:30:13things that will help me get this
- 7:30:14priority. That's it. And to me, if you
- 7:30:17like what you're going to get, why would
- 7:30:18you not make the trade? And so I had
- 7:30:20this clip that went super viral from a
- 7:30:22podcast that I did yesterday. And the
- 7:30:23host asked me, "If all my books and all
- 7:30:25my tweets and all my emails and all my
- 7:30:27YouTube videos were all deleted and I
- 7:30:29had to compress all of my stuff uh into
- 7:30:32into 60 seconds, what would I say for
- 7:30:34somebody who's in their 20s and 30s?"
- 7:30:36This is what I said. Figure out what you
- 7:30:37want. Ignore the opinions of others and
- 7:30:39do so much volume that it would be
- 7:30:41unreasonable to not be successful.
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