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The Art of Game Manifesto — Transcript

by Todd V Dating · 27,133 words · 3,692 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

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0:15alright alright ok got singles yeah it's
0:22good to be back it's good to be back I
0:24usually hear that from girls night guys
0:25but you know I'll take it away alright
0:28um so what I want to talk to you guys
0:31about today is some really important
0:33[ __ ] basically um I'm gonna give you
0:36guys I'm gonna lay out for you guys step
0:38by step what I do and how I think
0:41in-game right what a process is how I
0:43think about an interaction how I think
0:45about what I'm doing with a girl where
0:48I'm at all those kind of things and
0:50basically is going to be three sections
0:52to this first section is the 3 factors
0:54that absolutely must be in place for you
0:56to get laid no matter what your strategy
0:58if it's cold approach but social circle
1:01if it's online game these are the three
1:02things you have to have period alright
1:04so we go through that next thing we're
1:06gonna go through the models of
1:08attraction and models of cold approached
1:09game as I learned them so for those of
1:11you who haven't been in the game since
1:13you know 2000 like I have I'm gonna go
1:15through all of the history everything
1:17that's been shown to work since then
1:19till now and show how it all kind of
1:22comes together what all the good
1:23elements that have been lost work
1:25and then finally we'll talk about
1:26implementation one of the biggest things
1:28I hear when I talk to people about like
1:29structuring their game or having a game
1:31plan is how do I actually do it how do I
1:33actually use it and especially how do I
1:35do it without like getting in my head or
1:36how do I do it without like not being
1:38fluid whatever all right
1:40so it's gonna be those three different
1:41sections there's gonna be a lot of
1:43information for those of you who have
1:44you know papers to take notes by all
1:46means do it for those who have phones by
1:48all means I don't mind take notes
1:50learn etc I don't want a lot of
1:53questions because we have a lot of
1:55material however I will break for
1:57questions at two distinct times to have
1:59three sections between each section I'll
2:01take questions so if you have a burning
2:02question you absolutely have to answer
2:04it have to have answered feel free to
2:06ask it during that section but I don't
2:08want like ten hands in the air every
2:09five seconds because really gonna just
2:11mess up the flow and we'll be here all
2:12night because there's seriously a ton of
2:13material I'm gonna drop decades of
2:16material on you guys
2:17okay does it make sense all right you
2:19guys excited um just to kind of couch
2:23all this I want to kind of ask you guys
2:25a couple questions first question is how
2:26many people sometimes you're talking
2:28with a girl and you don't know what to
2:29do next that ever happen yeah
2:31ever like constantly okay good alright
2:35or does it sometimes happen that you
2:38kind of know what to do next but you're
2:39not sure how to do it right you're like
2:41I'm at point a I gotta get to point Z
2:43and what the [ __ ] all right that's what
2:46this is about that's what today is about
2:47the goal at the end of today is that you
2:50will always have a game plan all right
2:52you will always know where you're at
2:53where you need to go and you'll have a
2:55game plan or maybe six game plans to get
2:59you there all right so I don't want you
3:00guys to be at a loss ever again
3:02so that's the idea um so without further
3:04ado let's talk about this what gets guys
3:07late what are the three factors that
3:08absolutely must be in place to get guys
3:10late and I think you guys will agree
3:12with me as I show you them first one
3:14access you have to have access to girls
3:17to get laid it's hard to get laid when
3:20you're far apart from girls it's a
3:21physical and it's a physical act right
3:22so access right you need to find girls
3:25and that can be done a lot of ways can
3:26be done you know cold approach you'd be
3:28done social circle online whatever but
3:30you got to find girls somewhere secondly
3:32attraction right an attraction can be
3:34phrased different ways value intrigue
3:36interest whatever but you have to have
3:38some sort of like a decision on the
3:40girls part that she likes you chooses
3:43you that you're special in some way she
3:45has some sort you have some sort of
3:46emotional relevance to her okay so
3:47that's that's attraction and then
3:49finally we have a follow through okay
3:51and follow through it it's a bit of a
3:52catch-all but basically it means once
3:56the girl likes you not [ __ ] it up
3:57right getting her from she likes you in
4:00a public place - she likes you in a
4:02private place where sex will happen and
4:03that includes things like logistics it
4:06includes things like not making her look
4:07[ __ ] and feel [ __ ] it includes
4:11things like making her feel comfortable
4:13and making her trust you all these other
4:14things that are parts of developing the
4:16relationship alright so no matter what
4:18way you meet a girl you're probably
4:19gonna need these three things you're not
4:21gonna sleep with a girl you don't have
4:21access to and I guess sleep with a girl
4:23who has no attraction or no desire
4:25whatsoever for you unless you're paying
4:27for it and you're
4:29I gotta sleep with a girl unless you do
4:31the follow-through properly
4:33all right so those are the three
4:34elements that always need to be in place
4:36all right so whatever whatever you're
4:37looking at whether you're looking at
4:38pickup cold approach social circle
4:41online always think in terms of these
4:43three factors right how can I improve my
4:45access how can I prove my follow-through
4:47out can I approve the attraction factor
4:48let's go a little deeper though so these
4:50are basically the three pillars if
4:51you're missing any of these three
4:52pillars you will have a problem right
4:55without any of these the triangle falls
4:56apart and you're wasted all right let's
4:59talk about access there's a lot of ways
5:01to get access to girls right you can get
5:03access to girls to a cold approach
5:04walking up and talking to strangers you
5:06could get access to girls through shared
5:08activities that's how most guys in the
5:10world get access to girls right they go
5:11to school and they sleep with or try to
5:13sleep with girls from their school or
5:15they go to work and you know they meet
5:16let you know Suzy that works at the desk
5:18next to them right social circle right
5:21and that involves you know having cool
5:23friends having activities shared
5:24activities and social circle really do
5:26intersect a lot because a lot of times
5:27you go to school with people and they're
5:29in your social circle etc but you can
5:31have a social circle without shared
5:32activities and really popular people
5:34very social people tend to have a social
5:36circle outside of the activities online
5:39one of the most abundant sources of
5:41women especially in the current modern
5:43day and the last idea is some sort of
5:46Fame having something that draws girls
5:48to you so if you are a famous actor or
5:50famous musician DJ anything like that or
5:54if you are famous within a social circle
5:57right if you're in college and your
5:58fraternity and you're well-known in that
5:59fraternity that's a form of fame right
6:01if you are an athlete in college you can
6:04you get you know put on stage every now
6:06and again that's a form of fame it
6:08doesn't have to be global fame it can be
6:09local even if you are like theoretically
6:12like the captain of your chess team you
6:14know the girls that are in the Chess
6:15Club you have a little bit of Fame in
6:17that context right so there is global
6:19and local fame in fact when I was
6:21growing up I had I had no global fame
6:22but I did have local fame as like you
6:24know academically as like the nerdy guy
6:26that the nerdy girls wanted so I'm well
6:28aware of that one all right so these are
6:30ways you can get access understand that
6:33you don't have to be doing cold approach
6:35to get access however there are pros and
6:37cons to all of these right and we're
6:39going to talk about what are good access
6:41strategies a good strategy for getting
6:43access
6:43needs to be these characteristics first
6:45of all has to be plausible there has to
6:46be a good reason why you're there and
6:48has to make sense for example imagine
6:50you are 50 years old and you want to go
6:51pick up girls on a college campus not to
6:55say that age is a problem not to say
6:56that a 50 year old guy can't be with 18
6:58year old girls cuz he certainly can
6:59definitely I've seen it I plan on doing
7:02it when I'm 50 however however there's a
7:07very good and reasonable question what
7:09the [ __ ] are you doing on a college
7:10campus in the first place right so the
7:12very fact that you're there conveys some
7:13sort of agenda conveys that there's
7:15something going on that maybe is a
7:17little odd right so it makes it a little
7:19implausible right one of the great
7:20things about something like online game
7:23is it's completely possible right
7:25everybody's agreed to be there everybody
7:27knows why you're there it's up front and
7:28so there's no plausibility issue okay
7:31cold approach is not the most plausible
7:34a lot of times right one of the
7:36struggles actually with cold approach
7:38one of the things that the experts that
7:39cold approach game dude that other guys
7:40don't is they make that cold approach
7:42plausible they make it make sense they
7:44make it seem like it just happened they
7:46make it seem normal
7:47instead of seeming like a big put-on
7:48event um next though abundant and
7:51scalable and this oh by the way I'm
7:53plausible for plausibility shared
7:55activities and social circle actually
7:57probably the best right if you want
7:58plausible access you go to school with a
8:00girl she sits in the decks desk next to
8:02you you have the most plausible access
8:03ever right or you're in a fraternity or
8:06sorority hopefully or not in a sorority
8:07but you're in a fraternity and you know
8:10the girls that are in that sorority
8:11there's a lot of plausible access there
8:12the problem with those kind of
8:14strategies though is the next one which
8:15is they're not abundant and scalable
8:17right the problem with social circle
8:20game is that it works within that social
8:22circle but it doesn't work in the whole
8:24broad world so let's say you have a
8:26really tight group of like attractive
8:27friends here in New York right but now
8:30you go to I don't know somewhere in Asia
8:33all of a sudden you don't have that
8:36social circle we go to Australia or
8:37Canada wherever right so you can't take
8:39it with you it's not abundant it's not
8:40scalable online is pretty abundant and
8:43scalable as well right at least if you
8:44live in a big city to a point old
8:47approach is completely abundant and
8:49scalable and that's one of those
8:50beautiful things about a cold approach
8:52to strategy is that you can go anywhere
8:55meet a girl and
8:56and that's actually why I love cold
8:58approach right every girl is out
9:00somewhere in life available to be cold
9:01approach so it gives you complete access
9:03complete abundance finally whatever
9:05you're doing must be well framed okay
9:08and what I mean by well framed is it
9:10shouldn't put you in a position of low
9:11value putting you in a position to where
9:12you look needy trihard desperate etc
9:15right and again the different strategies
9:17are better and worse in terms of this so
9:19for example online game not necessarily
9:22the best frame sometimes right online
9:24game why are you online
9:24why don't you already have a girlfriend
9:25right it's something that you have to
9:27get over cold approach game depending on
9:30the nature of how you do it sometimes
9:32not well framed right why did you you
9:34know have to run up to me and and
9:36approach me in this situation don't you
9:38already have a girlfriend is it's a
9:39little not the most normal now it can be
9:41framed if you do it better it's framed a
9:43better but again the framings there
9:45again in terms of this things like
9:47social circle game things like friends
9:50of friends those kind of things shared
9:52activities tend to be the best best
9:54friend and the absolute best framed way
9:56is famous right if you're famous and
9:58they come to you or if you have some
10:01kind of social proof and they come to
10:04you that's the best frames okay we're
10:06gonna talk about social proof and
10:07that'll come a little bit later but
10:08social proof not just in the sense of
10:10having friends and having people like
10:12you but also implying social proof
10:15implying through your actions and
10:16playing through your words and playing
10:17through the way you carry yourself that
10:19you are popular and have a good life
10:20that's very very plausible and it's very
10:22important for framing when you're
10:24talking about things like a cold
10:25approach okay so this is access right if
10:27you want a good access strategy
10:29everybody should be thinking this if you
10:30want to get laid you're thinking how am
10:31I going to make how and where am I going
10:32to meet girls right and then is it
10:34plausible is what I'm doing plausible is
10:36it abundant and scalable is it well
10:38framed and to the extent that it's not
10:39how can I improve those aspects right so
10:42that's the first thing you think about
10:43is where and how am i meeting next
10:46attraction right what is attraction
10:48basically the idea of attraction is it's
10:50very nebulous there's a lot of things in
10:52it but basically the idea is in some
10:54sort of evolutionary or value context
10:57the girl is better off getting your seed
10:59than some random guys seed
11:00alright that's that's what it basically
11:01comes down to and this can be for a
11:03variety of factors it can be because you
11:06look genetically big and strong it can
11:08be because you have good social
11:09feedback it could be because you seem
11:10rich and powerful and successful it
11:12could be for a lot of different things
11:14okay but the idea here is there's some
11:16reason why she's chosen that with you
11:18some reason why it's a win for her
11:20that's a big thing to keep in mind
11:21throughout all of game it should be a
11:23win for her if she's winning by sleeping
11:25with you she probably will if she's
11:27losing by sleeping with you she probably
11:29won't it's just that by there um and
11:31again this can take many forms
11:33genetic indicators social proof there's
11:37this great idea who here knows what an
11:38honest signal is in terms of evolution
11:40about half the room okay cool so an
11:43honest signal is something that's
11:45attractive and cannot be faked all right
11:47the example that's given an evolution a
11:48lot of times as the Peacocks feathers
11:50their brightly colored which means he
11:53has to have vitamins in his diet so he
11:54has to be healthy in order to make those
11:56colors and also the fact that they're
11:58brightly colored makes him a target for
11:59predators if he can survive with the
12:01brightly colored feathers he must be
12:03very very adept right and so it's it's
12:06an honest signal something it can't be
12:07faked that says I have good genetics
12:09right there's the same kind of thing for
12:12people right so things like a good
12:14physique symmetry those kind of things
12:16are an honest genetic signal things like
12:18social proof having people talk well
12:21about you having people say things about
12:22you it's very hard to fake right it's
12:25very easy for you to brag about yourself
12:26hey girl I got all this stuff going on
12:28I'm so good I'm the [ __ ] alright anybody
12:31can do that
12:31but if 10 other people have already told
12:35her about her before she meets you
12:36that's a lot harder to fake now if
12:39you're very clever you could fake that
12:40alright but that's much more difficult
12:42so it's considered a much more honest
12:43signal right so the harder some thing is
12:45to fake the more honest it is also
12:48generally things that are more negative
12:50tend to be more honest things that are
12:51more positive tend to be more dishonest
12:53because you have more reason to fake the
12:54positive than the negative it's a very
12:56unfortunate consequence of this all
12:57right but anything that's an honest
12:59display is is considered in terms of the
13:01girls level of attraction for you
13:03displays of competence if you're good at
13:05[ __ ] girls will respond to that even if
13:07it's silly stuff I'm telling you I got
13:09girls off a little bit not I didn't
13:11actually get them sent know how to
13:12follow through but I got attraction from
13:14girls on being good at school and good
13:15at chess as a kid I swear you I kid you
13:17not right any kind of competence will
13:19get you some sort of attractions
13:21and then abundance resources and power
13:23are very very powerful as as forms of
13:27Attraction and especially as you get
13:29older as a man these become more and
13:32more useful because in a certain sense
13:33if you're getting older if you're in
13:35you're like forties fifties sixties and
13:38you don't have any resources and you
13:40don't have any power there's this kind
13:42of like what's he doing with his life
13:43kind of thing right where is it 18
13:45you're not expected to have a lot of
13:46resources and power yet right so you
13:48need to kind of ideally have at least
13:50something of a semblance of what you
13:52kind of should have at your age and it
13:53will be helpful now you you can succeed
13:54without any of these but they all
13:56definitely help finally we have
13:59follow-through and so as I say here it's
14:01a general cocktail of not [ __ ] up
14:03right but it comes down to a lot of
14:06different things first of all is the
14:08girl comfortable with you and here I
14:10want to make a point because most people
14:12in game get the idea of comfort wrong
14:14okay the idea of comfort most people
14:16like oh she like you know you have
14:18things in common you have shared
14:19interests that's a little bit of comfort
14:22and the reason by the way that that
14:23helps a girl out is that if you have
14:24shared interests
14:25she's acquitting you with all the other
14:27people she's had shared interests with
14:28who are people she probably trusted so
14:30therefore by association she trusts you
14:31right but what you actually really want
14:34the comfort you want is what I call high
14:35value comfort high value comfort means
14:38she's comfortable that being with you
14:40won't be a degradation of her right
14:43she's comfortable that it won't make her
14:44look [ __ ] won't make her look bad
14:45socially won't give her a venereal
14:47disease won't listen have her have like
14:50a kid inside her that has bad genetics
14:51or will not be raised by his father
14:53those kind of things okay so it's it's
14:55comfort that it won't be a loss that's
14:57what it really comes down to it's not
14:59about if you have the same favorite
15:00color okay that really doesn't matter
15:02very much but a lot of guys get that
15:04wrong like oh you know I just girl and I
15:06we like the same music and had the same
15:08color
15:08why didn't she like me and sleep with me
15:10right that's not the most important
15:12factor um proper escalation okay knowing
15:16how to escalate without making the girl
15:17nervous and uncomfortable is so so so
15:19critical right if you either don't ever
15:21get physical or don't ever bring up the
15:23ideas of sex you're not gonna get laid
15:25at all if you do in a way that creeps
15:26are out makes her uncomfortable you're
15:28gonna have big problems and actually
15:30progress collation is another
15:32value as well right if you know how to
15:34escalate what does that say about your
15:35sexual history all right it says I've
15:37been with girls before girls have liked
15:39me before which also says you can be
15:41comfortable that being with me won't be
15:43a loss managing logistics getting her
15:47from point A to point B without it being
15:48awkward without her being [ __ ] etc
15:50managing the peer group so she doesn't
15:52appear [ __ ] and so that you can get
15:54isolation get to sex and then
15:56maintaining attraction through the
15:59comfort phase we'll talk about that a
16:00lot more later when we get into
16:01structured game but that's absolutely
16:03critical that's one of the biggest
16:04failings with guys who have a structured
16:06game plan so we'll talk about that more
16:07later okay but that's follow-through all
16:09right so you guys see how those three
16:10pillars work right you do be able to
16:11access the girls maybe I'll track the
16:13girls and then you DB will follow
16:14through if any of those are missing
16:15you're [ __ ] all right and that's gonna
16:17become very important as you start
16:18talking about the models because a lot
16:20of the models are good in one area but
16:21they break down somewhere else all right
16:24let's talk about models of game and
16:26we're gonna go in the order that I learn
16:28them right there's a lot of subjective
16:30ways we could do this I'm gonna do it in
16:31the order that I learned them from a
16:33teenage boy all the way to today so the
16:35first one is one you guys have probably
16:36never heard of because it's in some
16:38obscure book from the 1970s alright and
16:41this is the attractive qualities model
16:43listen mate basically when I was on
16:44digging through my father's porn
16:46collection I found this book and there's
16:47the porno magazines so anyway but it
16:51actually has some good information has
16:52some really good information and
16:53basically what they've done in this book
16:55is they did a survey of hundreds of
16:57women and they basically tried to suss
17:00out what are the qualities that there
17:02was women liked in men right then they
17:04date him and they've been attracted to a
17:05said room and they came up with
17:07basically what they would they boiled
17:09down to five qualities those were
17:11attractiveness attentiveness
17:12assertiveness assuredness and aliveness
17:14and we're gonna run through briefly what
17:18all of those are so first of all
17:19attractiveness this does not mean being
17:22like chiseled and having abs although
17:24that is that does help right but it
17:26doesn't mean just that what it really
17:27means is doing the most that you can
17:29with with your look okay so it means
17:32having a good haircut having a good
17:33style being in the gym all those kind of
17:35things in fact a lot of girls surveyed
17:38mentioned that they were with guys that
17:40were with or had been attracted to guys
17:42who had actually ugly faces but their
17:44overall impression was
17:45very very good right and so as men were
17:48lucky in that sense as women women are
17:50being judged very much on just the
17:52physical for us those guys were being
17:53judged as the message being conveyed by
17:55the physical a lot all right so there's
17:57a lot you can do with your
17:57attractiveness so it's not just being in
17:59the gym in having good physique although
18:01you guys all should do that okay because
18:03why not it's only gonna help right it's
18:06another factor in this but it's not just
18:07that and it's not just about being
18:08genetically attractive or being
18:10perfectly symmetrical or being a model
18:12or anything like that
18:13okay next attentiveness and this is an
18:17interesting one this is this actually
18:18kind of if I if I were to rewrite this
18:21list I would put it deeper down in the
18:23list because I want to get to it later
18:24but actually [ __ ] it we'll do that one
18:25last because I can assertiveness
18:28assertiveness basically means saying
18:30what you want doing what you want
18:32standing up for what you want those kind
18:34of things right and why is that
18:35attractive to women because it indicates
18:37you're a leader it indicates high social
18:39status if you're unwilling to be
18:41assertive if you're unwilling to speak
18:42your mind and stand up for yourself what
18:44does that say about your history in life
18:47exactly that when you stood up for
18:49yourself someone's like get the [ __ ] out
18:51of here loser or like punched you in the
18:52face right but if you are willing to be
18:55assertive that says when I've asserted
18:57myself when I've tried to stand up for
18:58myself when I've asked for what I wanted
19:00I've received a positive response right
19:02and so it's a clear indicator of high
19:03status clear indicator of leadership etc
19:06so being assertive is very very good
19:08tell you guys a quick story the first
19:10date I ever went on in my entire life in
19:13high school basically I didn't know how
19:16to run a date I probably would have just
19:18gone nowhere with it but this this girl
19:19that was with actually kind of knew and
19:21like I think had set it up so that we
19:23would kind of be in a situation where
19:25good things could happen
19:26so basically we went and met one of her
19:28friends and like had a quick chat and
19:30then we went to go rent a movie and then
19:31go back to her place and watch the movie
19:32it sounds like a pretty good layout for
19:34a date right but I was trying so hard to
19:37be perfect on this date that and this
19:39was my first date no so nervous I didn't
19:40know what to do I spent probably half an
19:43hour perusing the movies trying to like
19:45pick just the just the right perfect
19:46movie for the date so eventually she
19:48just got pissed off and said we're
19:49taking this one and just left I was fed
19:51up with me and like nothing doing the
19:53rest of the day right even though it had
19:55been all set up and it was all laid out
19:56and funny enough like before even like
19:59going on the date with her had gotten
20:00physical with her just outside of even
20:02asking for the date once I got back to
20:04her place on the date we didn't even
20:05touch like didn't even hold hands didn't
20:06even touch whatever because I just
20:08[ __ ] it all up
20:09through lack of assertiveness lack of
20:11willingness to make a decision lack of
20:12willingness to say this is the movie I
20:14want do you want this one or have you
20:16seen this right as being too
20:17accommodating immediate turnoff okay
20:21assured Ness now assuredness seems
20:23similar to assertiveness assuredness
20:24means like being self-assured being
20:27confident that you're that you're high
20:29quality that you're the best maybe even
20:30being a little bit cocky right
20:32especially when it comes to escalating
20:33like if you go to touch a girl and
20:35you're hesitant can i maybe touch you
20:36here immediately turned off right but if
20:39you do it with confidence like you
20:40believe it's gonna work even if you do
20:42it a little bit wrong you'll usually get
20:43away with it okay so assuredness is
20:45believing that you are of high value and
20:47she will respond well to you now this is
20:49distinct from a certain from sorry from
20:51assertiveness because you could be
20:53assertive and not assured right you
20:55could be the person that stands up for
20:56himself but it's uncomfortable
20:58excuse me i just can i maybe say so you
21:01know you could be that person assertive
21:02but not assured you could also be
21:04assured but not assertive in the sense
21:06that you could be very confident with
21:09the girl one-on-one but as soon as
21:11there's other people around you're like
21:12afraid to touch her afraid to make a
21:14move afraid to address them a lot of
21:16pickup artists so this way when the girl
21:17has friends with them right one-on-one
21:19you're just fine as soon as the girls
21:21come friends come I'm like no I wasn't
21:22doing pickup I promised nos I would
21:23never know right
21:25that's it shared but not assertive all
21:28right last one our second to last one as
21:32we're doing is aliveness and that means
21:34just basically like being willing to
21:36take risks being willing to bring some
21:37energy and spark to the conversation
21:39just think of this as being non boring
21:40right like for example if say you're
21:44with a girl and things are going well
21:45and she goes hey let's go skinny-dipping
21:46you're like well no I just don't really
21:48feel like immediate turnoff okay not
21:51very alive not very much fun I mean
21:53imagine imagine having sex with the guy
21:56that doesn't want to go skinny-dipping
21:57right it's like it do use don't envision
22:00it quite as well it doesn't seem as much
22:02fun right so aliveness being willing to
22:04take risks this is actually a big reason
22:06why girls will get into guys that ride
22:09motorcycles
22:10guys that fight
22:11even those kind of things it's fun it's
22:12exciting it's emotionally stimulating
22:13even if logically like that's [ __ ]
22:16stupid they're still emotionally
22:17stimulated by it all right and then last
22:20one is attentiveness the reason I bring
22:22this one up last is because as I'm going
22:24to bring up all the other models there's
22:26this value comfort kind of conundrum
22:27attentiveness really falls into a
22:29comfort category more than a value
22:31category attentiveness means that you
22:33actually give a [ __ ] about the girl will
22:34so pay some attention to her right I
22:37guess a good example of this would be a
22:41lot of times in relationships girls will
22:43pick fights with you right and early on
22:46in the relationship or during a pick up
22:47a girl picking a fight with you might be
22:49like a test of your frame to test if
22:50you're gonna give in to her right a lot
22:52of times later on a relationship a girl
22:54will pick a fight with you to see if you
22:56actually fight back because if you're
22:58too dismissive if you don't seem to care
23:00that's gonna make her feel uncomfortable
23:01that's gonna make her feel like whatever
23:03you have with her isn't special
23:05does that make sense right and so that
23:08that sort of fact that you do care a
23:10little bit makes a difference or the
23:12fact that in you as you're escalating
23:14physically you take care to go slowly
23:16enough that it feels good for her all
23:18right you take care of you you know
23:19instead of just ripping well sometimes
23:21you can just refer clothes off and
23:22that's good right but instead of just
23:24automatically ripping your clothes off
23:25thoughtlessly maybe you take the time to
23:26like you know kiss her a few places
23:27caress a few places take your time with
23:29the foreplay that attentiveness
23:31indicates that the life that you're
23:34bringing her into will be more fun for
23:36her it also indicates some sort of
23:38sexual competence right so that would
23:40that bit willingness to be attentive to
23:42her that willing just treat her as a
23:43little bit special definitely will help
23:45girls out and down the road okay so
23:46those are the the big factors the other
23:48thing that I learned from this book was
23:51aggressive eye contact and I mean like
23:53[ __ ] aggressive okay in this book
23:55they basically recommended like staring
23:58slash leering at girls like constantly
24:00all right you know what it kind of works
24:02it actually [ __ ] works so I did this
24:04in class doesn't like in middle school
24:06that and they they recommended this like
24:07heavy-lidded kind of stare really like
24:11staring at the girl so I'm like in class
24:13like staring at the girl across the room
24:14for me like this and it actually [ __ ]
24:16worked it actually would give me a track
24:18it actually get the girls very intrigued
24:19that first like they did like look away
24:20and then look back at me like what's
24:21going on but eventually they get like
24:23mesmerized and hold eye contact and
24:24there's
24:24like connection from across there it was
24:26pretty good it's a little weird a little
24:29creepy but it actually went for a guy
24:31who had never done anything sexual with
24:33a girl's like a young teenage guy it was
24:35pretty amazing to see those results and
24:37it does show that power of eye contact
24:38and very very very useful so the results
24:41of this for me as a teenage boy I got
24:42attraction from girls in the class and
24:44kind of like a creepy like weird [ __ ]
24:47way
24:48I got attraction but there's no
24:49follow-through because this model it has
24:53the pros of telling you how to be an
24:54attractive man what are the attractive
24:56qualities but the problem is if you look
24:58at these a lot of these they're sort of
25:01non-contact events right that you're
25:03being attractive in isolation from the
25:05girl right if you become a more
25:07assertive person in general the girl may
25:09see that but it's not directly like
25:11you're communicating and talking with
25:12the girl and taking somewhere and going
25:13on a date right so there's no actual
25:15interaction right it's kind of like the
25:17guy who I joke around about this like
25:19who wants new cold approach by going to
25:21a club and sitting in the corner and
25:22just be like I'm James Bond and not
25:24talking to anybody right he might be the
25:26coolest guy but nobody has any access to
25:28the fact that he's cool because he's
25:29actually not breaking that like a
25:31conversational barrier right so with
25:33girls who actually did it have to
25:35interact with me I actually got a little
25:36more attraction from this but it wasn't
25:38really doing it in terms of meeting him
25:41also there's no follow-through the
25:43problem I had to is these girls get
25:45attracted to me I'm like then what it
25:47didn't know how to take him on a date
25:48didn't know how to talk to him didn't
25:49know how to escalate physically and he
25:50just would go nowhere right so it's a
25:52limited model but it's something next
25:54one I learned is a really great book
25:56that I read which I recommend to anyone
25:57and everyone on learning how to talk
25:59there's a book called making people talk
26:01by Barry Farber it's an incredible book
26:03basically this guy was a radio
26:05interviewer right that's his job is he's
26:07on radio people get on the show and he
26:09has to interview them make them
26:10interesting on air and so his whole idea
26:14was it in order to be a good
26:16conversationalist it's not about you
26:17talking at them it's about getting them
26:19to talk and by the way this concept is
26:21one of the things most missing in the
26:23current model of pickup right most guys
26:25in pickup are just talking at the girl
26:27and talking out the girl and talking out
26:28the girl and the girls not participating
26:29right learn this learn this idea the
26:34goal at the start of a pickup is to get
26:36her to talk is to
26:37her too invested to get her to
26:38participate that's the biggest thing you
26:40can be doing okay
26:41so just that idea of making people talk
26:43is huge but what this guy basically did
26:45is he gave me this book is a treatise on
26:48how to start a conversation with a
26:49stranger and how to make it a
26:50conversation that the stranger wants to
26:52be a part of
26:53okay now the failing of this book from a
26:55pickup standpoint is he didn't make the
26:57distinction of male and female strangers
26:59very much it's just how to talk to a
27:00stranger period so as it doesn't say a
27:02whole lot about sexualizing or or any of
27:04that kind of stuff but it is really good
27:05for talking and here are some rules
27:07first rule assume the burden of the
27:11interaction okay when you go up and talk
27:13to a girl or any stranger it's your job
27:17to make the conversation happen not
27:19theirs so if you got me go I said you
27:20say hi and they go hey and then you just
27:23sit there you [ __ ] up okay they
27:26weren't planning to talk to you they
27:27weren't prepared to talk to you you have
27:28to assume the burden you have to carry
27:30the conversation in your shoulders for
27:32usually the first 30 seconds or a minute
27:33all right and this is what's known as
27:35the 90/10 rule right you guys may have
27:37heard that one 90/10 rule now the
27:39problem with a 90/10 rule from again
27:41this making people talk perspective is
27:43this it should be ninety ten as long as
27:45it has to me but remember what the core
27:48goal is the core goal is to make her
27:49talk alright so guys get it in this
27:52ninety ten idea all right so there's two
27:54mistakes guys make one is they go up and
27:55just expect the girl to carry the
27:56conversation hey what's up I'm here oh
27:58[ __ ] nothing happened oops my bad the
28:01other one is they go ninety ten for six
28:03hours straight I just talk at the girl
28:05and talk to the girl and talk to the
28:06girl and don't let the girl talk so what
28:09you actually want to do is this assume
28:10the bird and up until the place where
28:12she's willing to talk as soon as she's
28:14willing to talk that's what you actually
28:16want okay so ninety ten because you have
28:18to but only for as long as you have to
28:21the goal is to sit back and let her talk
28:22um and then the other things that he
28:24would really work on in in in talk new
28:27people is make the other person feel
28:28important make the other person feel
28:30like the most special person in the
28:31world because if someone this makes
28:33sense if someone when they're with you
28:35feels special and feels like the center
28:37of attention and feels like they're
28:38really cool they're associating that
28:40feeling with you and they want further
28:41conversations with you where they feel
28:43special and cool and important all right
28:44so that's the general idea here now from
28:48a pickup perspective the problem here is
28:50that the girl might not care enough
28:52about your opinion of her to stay long
28:55enough for this to happen in some
28:57context right or she may not this you
28:59may not care enough in terms of like if
29:00you make her feel too special and
29:02important she may like enjoy the
29:03conversation in terms of this guy's
29:05amusing and fun but not in terms of I
29:07want his penis alright there's a little
29:09difference there but it is very useful
29:10the other thing that was very much
29:14brought home to me for him from reading
29:15this book is the importance of words
29:16right if pick up and talking to girls is
29:20a verbal art it's a verbal endeavor so
29:24the more that you study words the more
29:26that you study humor the more that you
29:27have a good vocabulary the more that
29:30we'll talk about frame control and [ __ ]
29:31tests and those kind of things the more
29:33adept you are verbally the better off
29:35you're gonna be with girls and this is
29:36actually becoming even more important as
29:38we move to a world that has more online
29:40game in more social media right because
29:43you can't convey a lot of body language
29:44through those channels it's gotta be
29:46words alright so learning and working on
29:48your words is critically critically
29:49important so basically I took this went
29:53to college and I got probably two dates
29:56every single weekend and I went for 10
30:00months before I got my first kiss right
30:02because what I was doing here is I was
30:04did one thing one thing I've always done
30:06really well is I've always taken a model
30:07and followed it really really well so if
30:09the model was incomplete my game was
30:11definitely incomplete right so this is
30:13an incomplete model it didn't teach me
30:14how to get sexual but it taught me how
30:16to get dates so I was getting date after
30:17date after date never ever ever kissed a
30:19girl because there was nothing sexual in
30:21this model but if you want to get social
30:24dates absolutely a brilliant model in
30:27fact if you know how to escalate later
30:28and escalate on the date this model
30:30actually is pretty good there as well
30:32but you've got to be able to escalate at
30:33some point that's what's missing here
30:34that's the biggest thing that's missing
30:36it's also an early game model but we'll
30:38talk about that in a little bit okay so
30:40that was the next thing still not
30:41getting laid though like if you look at
30:43my personal history I'm getting some
30:44dates now getting talking to girls still
30:45not getting laid all right how many guys
30:46have heard of a book called double your
30:48dating yeah how many guys have read this
30:50book yeah some know one - just a few we
30:54know who's really been in the pickup
30:55community for a while now so double your
30:57dating was a book by a man named David
30:58DeAngelo which for me was absolutely
31:01groundbreaking and for the pickup
31:02community be fair was
31:03groundbreaking and basically if I were
31:06to sum up in two words what this book
31:08was about
31:09it's called cocky funny right those are
31:11the two things you're trying to be
31:12you're trying to be cocky and to be fair
31:14like a lot of his funny wasn't really
31:16that funny but it's like it's like cocky
31:19and like challenging or cocky and like
31:21and like a little bit shocking like
31:24cocky and shocking cocky and challenging
31:26would probably almost be a better phrase
31:27worth than cocky and funny because it
31:28wasn't like comedic but the thing here
31:30is you're going up to a girl and here's
31:32what's brilliant about it
31:33you're telling her I'm amazing one way
31:36or another and that's a beautiful thing
31:38right because if you go up to a girl and
31:40tell her you're amazing what's her
31:41option what can she do with that all
31:45right she can either accept that you're
31:46amazing which that seems to work pretty
31:48well right or she can challenge that
31:50you're amazing in which case now you're
31:52in a back and forth through and verbal
31:54banter and good things can happen right
31:56and so just that permission to like be a
31:59little bit cocky that permission to be a
32:01little shocking was really really
32:04powerful for me and powerful for tons
32:06and tons of guys um and then the other
32:08thing that he taught in that book
32:09because I'm sure that by doing that he
32:11got [ __ ] tested like a [ __ ] who
32:13was how to pass [ __ ] test and basically
32:15it's not one technique for passing a
32:16test which is a technique called
32:17misinterpretation right
32:19misinterpretation basically means treat
32:20it like it was a compliment
32:21so if it were goes air that sure it's so
32:23black you go glad you like it right that
32:26was like it'd be like the double your
32:28dating response everything Oh glad you
32:29like it
32:29or what is it about black shirts you
32:31like so much okay but so is a very
32:34formulaic it's very predictable once
32:36you've kind of read it and seen it but
32:38it does have that element that you are
32:40making things sexually charged you are
32:42taking a risk does it make sense
32:44all right now so with this I actually
32:47started getting attraction I actually
32:48did get laid once I still once I started
32:50using these techniques etc I was pretty
32:52close before with the other technique so
32:53I might have gotten there eventually but
32:54this definitely put me over the top
32:56however in my career teaching pickup
33:00I've seen a lot of guys who did this
33:02style of game and like like learned just
33:04this and I had kind of an affectionate
33:08phrase for them we called them cocky
33:10funny [ __ ] heads because guys that were
33:14just being cocky funny cocky funny cocky
33:16funny
33:17what would end up happening is that
33:18they're ending up like just trolling the
33:20girl and not actually taking in the
33:22direction right so just like they're
33:24just making fun of the girl and just
33:26being a dick because they found that
33:28they can get away with it and the girl
33:29will tolerate it for a bit and tolerate
33:31it for a bit but then eventually she
33:32won't and so they'd end up with these
33:34like very fun interesting interactions
33:35but not getting a lot of sex right and
33:38it's because basically I mean it's a
33:41model that has a traction in it but no
33:42comfort right so to kind of understand
33:45that there's a there's a great Warren
33:46Buffett phrase which I like they say
33:48like any he says any long string of any
33:51any long string of big numbers
33:52multiplied together with even one zero
33:54in the string always equals zero that
33:57makes sense so the double your dating
34:00model was a little bit like that it was
34:01a little bit like if you were gonna like
34:02if you were like went to go went to the
34:04casino and you should bet on black and
34:05you just keep doubling down over and
34:06over and over again alright so the first
34:08time 5050 you're gonna win or end up
34:10with zero next time 50/50 win more end
34:13up with zero next time 50/50 win win
34:15more end up with zero right and so
34:17you're gonna leave the casino like
34:18almost every single time at zero one
34:22time and like a blue moon you're he
34:23ended up with like this massive stack of
34:25cash all right the problem with that
34:27though is if you think of like getting
34:29laid as like a monetary amount you don't
34:32need a massive stack of cash to get laid
34:34you need like a small stack of cash
34:35right like a decent-sized stack of cash
34:37all right so basically you're either
34:40massively overkill and just like frying
34:41the girls circuits and getting laid like
34:43one time in like hundreds and then 99
34:45times out of 100 [ __ ] it up and just
34:47blowing the set up does that make sense
34:48because this is very very very
34:52one-size-fits-all button-pushing model
34:54right and girls tend to see right
34:56through it however it is good for
34:58getting attraction so it's good as far
34:59as it goes that make sense okay cool
35:04next who's here who's heard of this one
35:06speed seduction there's no this one how
35:08many people have tried speed seduction
35:10nobody was bold enough
35:12nobody was daring enough to try it and I
35:15know piano P as per Ross Jeffries but
35:17yes yeah you tried it good I liked it I
35:20liked it somebody's been around as long
35:21as I have that's good
35:22um so speed seduction is really
35:24interesting really really interesting uh
35:26you know getting cuts at the bottom here
35:28actually made me worse but it did open
35:30my
35:31and actually even though it particularly
35:34made my results a little worse when I
35:35was trying it it is probably the most
35:37brilliant model to have come out up to
35:39its time and it included a lot of
35:42beautiful things that didn't exist
35:44before for those of you who don't know
35:45what speed seduction is here's basically
35:46what it is
35:47space deduction is the use of something
35:49called neuro linguistic programming
35:50which means communicating with a girl in
35:52in a way that's meant to lead her mind
35:55psychologically right what it meant in
35:58practice was saying and doing a lot of
36:00things that were meant to put sexual
36:02thoughts into a girl's head so example
36:04is this um you guys have all heard
36:06they've heard the phrase don't think of
36:08a pink elephant what do you guys all
36:10thinking of right now
36:10pink elephant right so the idea here
36:13would be maybe I would say oh you know
36:17my friend told me the funniest story was
36:18so crazy and then say like this
36:20blatantly sexual thing right so what
36:22you've done is you've relieved yourself
36:23with the responsibility of saying it by
36:24saying it was your friend and then you
36:26tell this very sexual story and in order
36:29for her to understand that very sexual
36:30story she has to imagine it right all
36:35right like for example if I were to tell
36:37all of you not to think of a penis right
36:38now sorry I did that to you I'm sorry I
36:42did that to you right but it's kind of
36:44hard to avoid and then as you're
36:46thinking about that you might think like
36:47to yourself oh [ __ ] I just thought oh
36:48this guy's penis am I actually a little
36:49gay alright it's hard to unlink these
36:54things so that's that's a very non
36:56subtle version of planting ideas and
36:58suggestions in your head right um the
37:00other thing this did was leading the
37:03conversation in sexual directions and it
37:06really emphasized storytelling which is
37:08one of the most powerful things in game
37:09right telling stories is hugely powerful
37:11right by telling the story you can
37:13communicate ideas communicate emotions
37:15and feelings and you can let someone get
37:17to know you all at once
37:18right so to be actively telling stories
37:21as part of your game was absolutely
37:23massive the other thing here was frame
37:24control right so in the double your
37:26dating model there was frame control in
37:28a path in a reactive sense as in the
37:30girl gives you a [ __ ] test and you're
37:32gonna use frame control to get around
37:34that [ __ ] test there's a little bit of
37:35active frame control although there was
37:37one frame which is I'm amazing right I'm
37:39amazing and you're attracted to me I
37:40noticed right I was like that would be
37:42like the classic W dating opener
37:44I noticed you're attractive to me or
37:46attracted to me I'm sorry you are kind
37:47of attractive but anyway whatever okay
37:49so here you're getting sexual right and
37:53I messed around with this and it was
37:55actually really really kind of freaky
37:57all right so what I what I did with this
37:59is um I can think of two kind of
38:02situations that that were just that I
38:04did this with very unusual one was I
38:06went on a coffee date with a girl and I
38:08started doing these like speed seduction
38:09patterns there's like these routines and
38:11stories that are meant to be like all
38:12sexually didn't lead the minds and I'm
38:15at a Starbucks I don't like this girl
38:17and I are like holding hands on the
38:18Starbucks table and she just like closed
38:20her eyes is like mmm at Starbucks I was
38:26like okay that's [ __ ] cool like I'd
38:27never seen that before this is amazing
38:29this is working and then I tried to get
38:31her to go you know anywhere else with me
38:33from Starbucks and she got really
38:34nervous like no no no I'm not going
38:35anywhere I'm not going anywhere because
38:37she was weirded out by how attracted she
38:39had been she was weirded out by the fact
38:40that she'd just done what she'd done in
38:42public
38:42she's weird out by the fact that she
38:44didn't know me and like it was all it
38:45was all very sexual without anything
38:47friendly without anything like in terms
38:50of getting to know each other on a
38:50factual level etc right so it didn't
38:53really work I had in another similar
38:54situation to that in in my college
38:57library like a like a little while later
38:59right whereas like again girl getting
39:01very aroused in like a public place but
39:03then when it went would say like getting
39:04her home or getting here on a date later
39:06is extremely flaky extremely weird but
39:09very eye-opening like a very eye-opening
39:11those getting those kind of reactions
39:13and to be fair I again I never got laid
39:16directly with speed seduction however
39:17later on in my game I do use it in the
39:20bedroom and I do use it late on in an
39:22interaction sometimes or little elements
39:24of it so there are a lot of good little
39:26bits of it okay so that's a speed
39:29seduction okay and that brings us to to
39:33structured game alright and that's this
39:35is where you're starting to get into a
39:36more robust model of game alright and I
39:39wanna I want to kind of most of a lot of
39:41you know the current structure game most
39:42of you probably don't know this one the
39:44original mystery model of game how many
39:45people have seen this fmac
39:46you've seen everything alright so this
39:49is basically the fmac means fine to meet
39:51attract clubs okay and I kind of want to
39:55talk to you about this model as a
39:57structured game
39:58get the other models because it's it's
40:01gonna highlight them really well so as
40:03far as clothes right as far as the
40:05clothes part basically that speed
40:07seduction
40:07at this point right because speed
40:09seduction is go in and like walk up to a
40:11stranger and just clothes all right just
40:15walk up and just start talking sexual
40:17and clothes and try and try and make it
40:19work
40:19right now if we were to walk up to the
40:21girl in her bedroom somehow is your
40:22first meeting that could work but most
40:24of the time it's not going to work in
40:26public right so speed seduction is like
40:27it's like just just the C in fmac right
40:31if you look at the the double your
40:33dating model it's just the a it's just a
40:36track to track to track to track the
40:38track to tracked and just keep
40:39attracting until her circuits prime
40:40right if you look at the gig making her
40:47talk making people talk model right
40:49that's basically meat right it's just
40:52meat meat meat meat meat but there's no
40:53attraction and no clothes so you're just
40:55making friends right so you can see all
40:57these models that were before they all
40:59had really good elements but the problem
41:01was there was no no structure in no
41:03direction to it all right
41:04and to be fair this is what I see with a
41:06lot of guys in game nowadays I see a lot
41:08of guys would go out tell me if this is
41:10familiar to you go out you tease the
41:12girl you attract the girl it's going
41:13well but then you're like oh [ __ ] what
41:14now has that ever happen right
41:17absolutely that's basically you're doing
41:20the double your dating model essentially
41:21now I'm probably doing a little more
41:23calibrating so there's a lot more
41:24technology now we're essentially doing
41:26that model right or do you ever find
41:29yourself in the half hour conversation
41:30in nowhere where you're just talking to
41:31girls and it's just like Latanya
41:33platonic and you just can't seem to take
41:34it anywhere else all right what are you
41:36doing you're doing just the meet model
41:37you're basically doing them making her
41:39talk model of game right so all of these
41:41models are sort of contained into the
41:45later models that have come and if you
41:47understand the pros and cons you
41:48understand what works within those
41:50earlier models you'll understand how to
41:51do the later models so basically the
41:54biggest thing that this did for me was
41:55give me a frame of reference for all the
41:57other models where do these pieces
41:59actually fit in how can I use them ie
42:01there's a sequencing right walk out and
42:03do the making people talk model then do
42:06some double your dating model then do
42:07some speed seduction model done close
42:09alright it actually kind of works um
42:12the other thing that that maybe
42:13mysteries most brilliant work to the
42:15pickup community ever is group theory
42:17how to open groups right and and just
42:19find me to track closed model he
42:21basically taught groups area and that's
42:23like before that I had gone around my
42:26college campus and whatever I saw a
42:27group of girls I would literally like
42:29stalk them to wait for the wounded
42:30gazelle to leave the herd so I could run
42:33in for a 30-second talk to her and run
42:35away before her friends caught me okay
42:37once I learned how to approach groups
42:39now I can actually you know talk to
42:40people in a normal social way I can go
42:42to parties and like actually talk to the
42:43girl I want it was amazing so that's
42:46another thing that came out of this
42:47which is absolutely beautiful
42:49all right now the structured game I'm
42:52going to talk about the most and the
42:53models I'm gonna talking about the most
42:54here are the current structured game
42:56model so we talked about an advanced
42:58structured game and then we'll talk
42:59about what so-called natural game as two
43:02different models and and how they kind
43:03of work so you can say this is mystery
43:052.0 or you say it's the early of the rsd
43:08model prior to 2006 maybe 2007 something
43:13like that
43:14they're essentially the same because
43:16they were the same company at one point
43:18and they taught the same [ __ ] after they
43:20split but basically the mystery would be
43:24open attraction comfort and closed with
43:27like you know numbers a 1 a 2 a 3 C 1 C
43:302 C 3 under comfort eventually and then
43:32the RSC will be open hook connection
43:35which is basically Comfort emotional and
43:36physical and then close so it's
43:37essentially the same model so
43:39essentially the same idea but it has a
43:41sequence and you'll notice it's very
43:42similar to find me the tracked clothes
43:44model right and the brilliance of this
43:46for a cold approach is that what you
43:49actually want to be doing in game and
43:51this is very important like if you like
43:53our thinking game what you want to be
43:54doing what are we spending most of your
43:55time in comfort and closing that's how
43:58your game should look right most of you
43:59who have watched infield footage
44:01probably think the opposite right you
44:03think it's all about getting big
44:04reactions that have it goes oh my god
44:05alright that's not what game is game is
44:08not about how many Oh My gods you get in
44:10the public club is how many oh my god
44:11you get in the bedroom okay
44:13all right so it's about connection and
44:17closing the hooking and attraction stuff
44:19is just to get you there right that's
44:22only to make you relevant enough to the
44:23girl that she wants to connect and be
44:25closed
44:25all right so understand that um but in a
44:28cold approach setting if you just walk
44:30straight in and look for comfort
44:32it looks very kind of low value it looks
44:35very very try hard and the girl doesn't
44:37have a reason to want to connect with
44:39you right and actually we talked about
44:41the structured game
44:43the single biggest place where people
44:46would lose lose girls was right here
44:50between attraction and comfort right
44:52because there is this idea basically the
44:54way structure game went was you open and
44:55you have like these stories you're
44:56telling or whatever right and then
44:58attraction is the you know teasing I've
45:01you know hands off the merchandise you
45:03and I won't get a long back turn all
45:05this kind of stuff right and actually
45:06works really really well really well and
45:09then you're gonna go into comfort which
45:11is oh hey I actually really like you
45:12you're actually kind of special etc the
45:15problem is a couple things its massively
45:17incongruent
45:17right first of all hey hands off the
45:19merchandise I don't like you your [ __ ]
45:21off you've good luck wow you're kind of
45:23special okay it's like where did that
45:25come from right so that transition and
45:27making it plausible it's very very very
45:30difficult the other problem is this most
45:33of the reason why the girl liked you and
45:34chase it was chasing you is because
45:35you're unavailable then you make
45:37yourself available in comfort and if at
45:39any point things don't go your way
45:42you no longer have all that power and
45:44leverage you had earlier because you've
45:46clearly made yourself available right
45:48the reason the girl liked you is because
45:49she couldn't have you right but as snow
45:52she can have you where's your power
45:53where are you going with that on top of
45:55that it made it really [ __ ] hard to
45:57escalate imagine that hands off the
45:59merchandise hands off now it doesn't
46:00work doesn't work hey let's have sex
46:01right
46:03escalation didn't make a lot of sense
46:05either and so you'd see a lot of guys
46:07get tons and tons of Attraction but the
46:09transition to comfort and closing was
46:12very very difficult and getting girls to
46:15qualify was like the hard part right
46:17there was this line it's actually decent
46:19line if used right which was you're
46:22you're kind of cute but beauty is common
46:25what do you have going for you besides
46:26your looks they'll make
46:27get to know you guys heard that line
46:28before right and that was like the when
46:31you did if you did structure gaming that
46:33was your thing when you drop that line
46:34you're literally holding your breath
46:36because because if you say that line and
46:40she starts qualifying herself you're
46:41like ha this one's gonna work if you say
46:44that line you're like hey what are you
46:45guys going for besides your looks and
46:46she's like oh nothing like [ __ ] my life
46:49what do I do now right because I was
46:51like our one go-to line to make that
46:53transition right or if if the girl goes
46:56why should I tell you you're really
46:57[ __ ] right because that means you
46:59didn't even do enough of like attraction
47:02stuff and now you have to go back in
47:03cycle through it while you've already
47:04given away that you're interested in the
47:06girl [ __ ] right and so when this worked
47:09when this worked it was some of the most
47:12powerful game you've ever seen and I
47:14[ __ ] you not on that like some of the
47:15most powerful game and it had the
47:17capability to get like true tens like
47:21celebrities [ __ ] like that right
47:23it had that power however I was like
47:26walking a tightrope as soon as you lean
47:28a little too far one way you're off that
47:29tightrope when you were completely
47:30[ __ ] and you have to like go climb all
47:32the way back on and start over
47:33alright so he's very very inflexible and
47:37very very hard to actually follow
47:39through to like a conclusion or a result
47:41but it was like the most powerful type
47:43of game I've ever seen what else to say
47:46about this but pre-close
47:49basically so basically this this linear
47:52sequence is very good the other problem
47:54with this is that guys would get this
47:56linear sequence if I have to open I have
47:58to do a traction ask to comfort I have
47:59to do close and they'd have this idea
48:02that it's supposed to take like four to
48:03seven hours and they have to do all
48:04these various routines and stuff
48:05sometimes they'd walk up to a girl
48:07they'd say hey what's up and grow big
48:08you're hot and the guy to be like well
48:11first I need to neg her three times and
48:13then I need to like spend 45 minutes
48:15talking to her about you know showing
48:16her my photos around the world and then
48:18and only then can I invite her on a day
48:20to write it's absolutely ridiculous
48:24right because the idea was this
48:25procedure worked but it's a long
48:28procedure and a lot of times you don't
48:30have to do all of it alright so that's
48:32another major major problem with it so
48:35yeah so the transition protraction of
48:37comfort was very very difficult
48:38escalation is very rare
48:40cult and the problem is it takes a
48:41[ __ ] long time and it's not very
48:43flexible however extremely powerful
48:46extremely good so yeah
48:48pros to it absolutely amazing it groups
48:51how many of you guys I think you're
48:54really good at approaching groups
48:55anybody one guy in here if this was like
49:0010 years ago and this was like a serious
49:02room of like pick up guys so if you like
49:04yes me me me right you know why cuz they
49:07did this [ __ ] and it works really well
49:09for groups works really well for groups
49:11how often when you see a hot girl shoot
49:13with a group like always like [ __ ]
49:1799.9 percent of the time right so maybe
49:20this would be a good thing to like learn
49:22and re-implement a little bit for those
49:23group situations just a suggestion just
49:25throwing it out there okay
49:27amazing for groups amazing for getting
49:29attraction and actually amazing for
49:31getting the girls you're not supposed to
49:33get all right the girls that are like
49:35technically above you um next thing and
49:38this is amazing - it made game
49:39scientific and testable because none
49:42that not that this is entirely a good
49:43thing but because guys were going up and
49:45saying the same things and doing the
49:46same things over and over and over again
49:47they actually got a sample size and they
49:50actually got a control group you could
49:51say hey this routine works this routine
49:53doesn't work has I open ten times with
49:54it and I open ten times with this one
49:56and these are my results right so it
49:58actually made it testable which is
50:00really really useful and and here's a
50:01general principle on that if in your
50:04game you're being proactive ie you're
50:07actively doing something to the girl
50:09doing something to the environment
50:10you're the one at cause and making
50:12things happen it's gonna be very easy to
50:14tell when you're doing things well if
50:15you're in a reaction if you're just like
50:18kind of hoping and waiting for things to
50:19happen it's gonna be very hard to tell
50:21that's very very hard to learn because
50:24there's no cause and effect that make
50:26sense if you're not at cause it's hard
50:28to judge the effect so any kind of game
50:30style you want to learn you always want
50:32to make sure you're at cause make sure
50:33you're the one doing things rather than
50:34having things done to you for exits good
50:37game but also because otherwise you will
50:39never learn it's just this it's almost
50:41impossible a sample size so mid game
50:43scientific and testable taught
50:45storytelling and it made the people
50:46doing this interesting when I was okay
50:48so when I was doing this camp structured
50:50game I would have a notebook in my
50:52back pocket at all times and whenever a
50:55comedian set a funny Joker that I
50:56overheard in a movie or on TV or
50:58whatever I'd write it down and whenever
51:00someone told a good story
51:01I'd like write like a couple bullet
51:03points if that was a good story and here
51:04was the structure of it how could I
51:05create a story like that right whenever
51:07I said something good interaction I
51:09remembered it I would go write it down
51:11after I'd be like after sleeping with a
51:12girl I'd go in the bathroom and write
51:13down like the things I said to her right
51:15so I was it sounds plenty right but I
51:18was actively working on being a more
51:19interesting person I was actively
51:22working on conveying a more interesting
51:23life telling better stories being
51:25funnier right in a very structured very
51:28direct way is very very useful in that
51:30regard
51:30next one great for flipping the script
51:32and getting her to chase and for any of
51:33you who have seen some of my more recent
51:35material on how to get 9s and 10s and
51:37whatnot
51:38you'll know that getting the girl to
51:39chase is one of the things that I am
51:41absolutely the biggest on in game
51:42getting the girl to invest game the girl
51:44to chase I call it reverse LMR right you
51:46should get the girl to the bedroom and
51:48instead of her being like no no no we
51:49can't even know why we shouldn't and
51:51she's the one jumping on you that should
51:53be the goal and this type of game is
51:54very very good for that in fact
51:56sometimes it's a little too good for
51:57that I'll tell you a an interesting
52:00story of as I was learning this game so
52:02I'd been decent with like somewhat
52:05attractive girls but I wasn't getting
52:06the hottest hottest girls right and then
52:09I had one week where I went out I went
52:11out twice in that week both times I went
52:13to a bar that was like a pretty high-end
52:14bar like where I was almost intimidated
52:16in the bar and I wouldn't talk to a girl
52:18in like an intimidating group who was
52:20like the hottest girl in the bar got her
52:22number I had her chasing me had her like
52:24touching me and then I had her come out
52:26for me on a day-to right within like 2
52:29times going out hottest girl in the bar
52:31twice picking her up twice caterer on a
52:33day-to and then I'm both day two's went
52:36on the date - everything was good got it
52:37got back to her place went to kiss her
52:39and she freaked out because she actually
52:41thought I was the entire time weirdly
52:44enough right
52:45because what had happened was I had
52:46learned to be interesting I'd learned to
52:49be non-threatening I'd learned to be
52:50very unavailable and trigger all those
52:53kind of like I can't have it so I wanted
52:54emotions but I had done it so
52:56convincingly and so well and I hadn't
53:00like conveyed intent in other ways that
53:02both those girls actually like thought I
53:03was gay
53:04right now eventually I did learn to do
53:06get those really hot girls without being
53:08gay at the same time right I learned I
53:10learned how to get through that
53:11transition but it was very interesting
53:12that that transition occurred between
53:14like getting average girls getting the
53:16hot girls thinking I'm gay and then
53:17getting the hot girls not thinking I'm
53:18gay because it is a very backwards
53:22getting them to chase kind of a game and
53:23for a girl that's really hot like how
53:25many guys ever do that to her pretty
53:27much gay guys gay guys and like guys
53:29that are out of her league like a true
53:30celebrity basically um anyway not not
53:33that's not it that's not a knock in the
53:35style of game by the way because I'm my
53:36first the majority of my first 60 lays
53:39also came from that style of game so you
53:41definitely can convey some non gay
53:42things as well but it's just interesting
53:44story so it works very well in the
53:46hottest girls works on getting into
53:48getting in the chase and then the last
53:49thing and this is maybe one of the most
53:51important things in my game that nobody
53:52else does or nobody does these days is
53:55the idea that I call plot line okay
53:57now plot line basically means that
54:00there's a dynamic there's an underlying
54:01story between you and the girl okay so
54:03for this think of a romantic comedy
54:06right and I'm sure like all of you are
54:08thinking of different romantic comedies
54:10right now there are many many different
54:11romantic comedies but probably this is
54:13true for all of them at some point I'm a
54:16guy in a girl meeting and at some point
54:18there's some tension between them excuse
54:20me they don't get along maybe they're
54:21adversaries maybe there's some
54:23circumstance between them maybe their
54:25friends don't like each other and maybe
54:26they're competing in something whatever
54:27right they don't get along at first and
54:29there's more and more heightened emotion
54:32between them in this negative sense and
54:33then at some point something happens
54:36where one of them kind of realizes oh
54:38the other one's okay or they're stressed
54:39into a situation where they're forced to
54:40get to know each other a little bit and
54:42they realize they're okay and then all
54:43that negative emotion gets transferred
54:45to positive emotion and it's like really
54:47amazing and they live happily ever after
54:48that's sound like every romantic comedy
54:50you've ever seen in your entire life
54:52there's a reason for that because that's
54:54the formula of a girl like falling in
54:56love with a guy basically that's the
54:59formula right the formula is a lot of
55:02emotion and then it becomes positive but
55:04it's a lot easier to trigger strong
55:06negative emotions than it is this
55:07trigger strong positive emotions right
55:09so what you want to create is that
55:10tension right the reason most guys stuck
55:13with girls and suck at game and I've
55:14been a half-hour conversation in nowhere
55:16is as soon as there's any tension and
55:17they're really
55:18relationship the guy's eyes away from it
55:19all right I had a student this past
55:23weekend and here's a really cool social
55:25guy like really pretty successful life
55:27good-looking could open like a
55:28[ __ ] like he was really good at
55:30opening conversations but every time I'd
55:33wing with him
55:33the conversation would go absolutely
55:35nowhere because what happen is I to
55:37introduce some of this plot line and
55:39some of this tension and get the girl
55:40kind of like you know teasing and going
55:42back and forth and then he'd immediately
55:44throw in like a bunch of small talk and
55:46like chitchat and just like squash all
55:48the tension and then a few minutes later
55:50I'd introduce some more tension and then
55:51he'd squash it a tense I'd introduce it
55:54he'd squash it would never go anywhere
55:55reason was that tension is risky that
55:58tension could get you a rejection so
56:00most guys shy away from it what you want
56:02to do is go into that tension you want
56:04to create that tension all right so
56:07anyway that's the start of plotline the
56:09idea of plotline is that you have that
56:11tension that's created between the two
56:12of you and then there's a resolution
56:14tension and resolution with a story
56:16behind it with a story she can buy into
56:18that that makes her like want to want to
56:21be with you basically think to yourself
56:23if whenever you're talking to a girl
56:24think to yourself if after this
56:26interaction she were to go talk to our
56:27friends and tell them about this
56:29interaction what would she tell them
56:31would she'd be like hey here's a guy who
56:33like wanted to [ __ ] me and I let him
56:35[ __ ] me that's not a story she wants to
56:37tell her friends but if on the other
56:38hand you be like hey you know what me
56:40and this guy we were talking and it was
56:41like like it first there was this
56:42tension and I didn't even know if I
56:43liked him and I definitely didn't like
56:45me but then actually we got to know each
56:46other and it was really good and then we
56:48like spent this magical time and we had
56:49so much in common and then like sex and
56:52it was beautiful and it just happened
56:53right that's what you want her to tell
56:55her friends right that's what she wants
56:57to tell her friends
56:57that's plot one right that's one plot
57:00line there are a lot of other plot lines
57:01you could have but that's that's a very
57:03common one right but this idea that
57:05there's a an underlying story between
57:07you and the girl is so so so so useful
57:09in game all right
57:10the other thing the plot line will do is
57:11this how many you guys have been talking
57:13to a girl you're talking about a
57:14particular topic and then at the end of
57:16that topic you're like [ __ ] we have
57:18nothing to talk about and then you bring
57:19up another topic you talk a little bit
57:21about you know that thing thinking like
57:23oh [ __ ] the conversations end you have
57:24to do something else you have to keep
57:26starting restarting and restarting the
57:28conversation it's never feel like that
57:29in game
57:30all right if you have a plotline that
57:33doesn't happen because you have those
57:35topics going on and then you have this
57:36plotline underneath so you always have a
57:38topic to go back to you always have
57:41something to say and it's productive and
57:43moves the interaction forward okay so
57:45plotline is one of the most brilliant
57:46ideas of game and that is it's something
57:48that came out with the structured can
57:50game okay cons I talked about some of
57:53these hard to escalate and hard to close
57:54very hard to close hard to recover from
57:58a loss of attention because think of it
58:00this way all you're doing is being non
58:01needy and dismissive oh I don't want you
58:03to dismissive dismissive and like even
58:05your opener it's almost accidental it's
58:07like hey I need your opinion on
58:08something but oh yeah I'm here so you
58:09may as well talk right now since
58:11everything you're doing is dismissive
58:13and I don't care and I don't need you
58:14let's say she gets distracted and pulled
58:16to the next room by her friends now you
58:18have to go into the next room and go
58:19find her me like yeah I'm not that
58:20interested in you I don't need to talk
58:21to you but I followed you all the way
58:23over here and I wanted to start the
58:24conversation again right it's very in
58:26congruence so if you ever like lose the
58:28momentum or lose the frame it's very
58:30hard to get it back next one is that
58:33people became too reliant on their
58:35routines you guys ever heard that I run
58:36out of things to say people say that
58:38nowadays people really said that with
58:40routines actually like I have my three
58:41routines and now nothing because before
58:45routines I never had a conversation with
58:46a human being before in my life right so
58:49that definitely open there was no
58:50information improvisational skill and
58:53the other thing was that you're not when
58:55you're just blindly saying things at the
58:57girl you're not paying any attention to
58:58their role so that could be a problem
58:59sometimes and then lots and lots of
59:01flaking because the amount of Attraction
59:03was so high then afterwards the girls
59:06would feel weird about it which by the
59:07way is not a knock on the style of game
59:08at all it's actually a positive on the
59:11style of game but understand that that
59:13was the case okay all right um so that
59:17brings us to direct game natural game
59:20etc which is for the most part there's
59:22there's variation but for the most part
59:24what gets taught by most people teaching
59:26pickup nowadays um an interesting thing
59:29with this is that if you look at it you
59:31guys remember the attractive man quality
59:33is where I talk about a attractiveness
59:34assertiveness assuredness attentiveness
59:36aliveness essentially direct and natural
59:39game is based on the premise that
59:41you have these qualities and then you're
59:43just gonna kind of like go put yourself
59:44in front of the girl and ask her to see
59:46them my goodness hey I thought hey I
59:47thought you were cute hey I liked you
59:49and I expect you instantly to see that I
59:51have all these qualities right and that
59:53instantly things problematic
59:55the problem with instantly is
59:56problematic is cuz they're looking at
59:58you and they don't have enough to go on
59:59right they haven't seen you do enough
1:00:01assertive things and attentive things
1:00:03and attractive things and those kind of
1:00:04things yet and so you get a lot of very
1:00:07quick rejections right one of the things
1:00:09I've seen in the last month more than
1:00:12I've ever seen before that really really
1:00:13annoys the [ __ ] out of me is everything
1:00:16it's just a numbers game it's just a
1:00:18numbers game it's just a numbers game
1:00:19everybody's [ __ ] saying that it's
1:00:21[ __ ] ridiculous
1:00:22right the point of game the point of
1:00:25learning game is to make it not a
1:00:26numbers game right anybody on the planet
1:00:29can have a numbers game anyone that
1:00:31planet can be like hi do you like me no
1:00:33hi do you like me no how do you like me
1:00:34like anybody can do that but the point
1:00:37of game is to to be able to convey your
1:00:39personality enough that by the time
1:00:41you've asked do you like me the answer
1:00:43is more likely gonna be yes that's the
1:00:46idea there well let's go into the the
1:00:50pros and cons so pros of direct and
1:00:52natural game and there definitely are
1:00:53some pros first one made escalation a
1:00:56lot easier okay if you've already said I
1:00:58like you I'm interested in you I'm
1:01:00attracted to you now escalation makes
1:01:02sense right if you were like hey hands
1:01:04off hands off when you touch the gross
1:01:06like why are you touching me
1:01:07you've already said hey you're cute I
1:01:09like you it makes sense to get physical
1:01:10it makes sense to make sense to take a
1:01:13go on instant date all the escalation
1:01:15makes sense and since most guys [ __ ] up
1:01:17an escalation making the escalation
1:01:19easier is a very positive thing it makes
1:01:21it more congruent it does force you to
1:01:23improvise so it does force you to as you
1:01:25get good at it to get rid of the idea if
1:01:27I ran out of things to say because you
1:01:28think that you can come up with your own
1:01:29so that's that's very good and it
1:01:32encouraged it it does encourage
1:01:33calibration because again every single
1:01:35set is different and so you understand
1:01:37that every single sets a little
1:01:38different you understand that you do
1:01:39have to adjust to the set so those are
1:01:41definite pros and they're definitely
1:01:43very huge pros in essence if I was to
1:01:46compare the results of the current like
1:01:49natural game style of game versus the
1:01:51old-school like structure style game
1:01:53here's what
1:01:53I'd say doing the natural style of game
1:01:55you will get laid more frequently but
1:01:59you will get laid with lower quality
1:02:00girls right because you'll be able
1:02:03you'll be able to escalate and buy more
1:02:06more frequently by the way I don't mean
1:02:07a higher percentage of sets either so
1:02:09you won't get laid a higher percentage
1:02:10of sets but you're doing more sets
1:02:12you're putting yourself out there faster
1:02:13so you'll just get to the point and get
1:02:15more lays right but you're gonna get
1:02:17laid with the girls that immediately
1:02:18liked you in the first like 30 seconds
1:02:21or a minute rather than the girls who
1:02:23you've got to like you or the girls that
1:02:25like we're a little out of your league
1:02:26that crew thing with the old-school like
1:02:28structured game you're gonna get
1:02:30probably laid a higher percentage of
1:02:32sets but your sets are gonna be much
1:02:33longer and more drawn out you're gonna
1:02:36get a higher caliber of girl but you're
1:02:38going to like have a lot of ones that
1:02:41get attracted to you and then you [ __ ]
1:02:42it up later so you'll be very
1:02:43frustrating in that way and the
1:02:45escalation parts can be very very
1:02:46difficult alright so those are the kind
1:02:48of the pros and cons of both so what I
1:02:51sort of think of in game and what I'm
1:02:53looking for personally in game is what I
1:02:55consider the Holy Grail which is the
1:02:58combination of the two to have the
1:03:00positives of the structured game and the
1:03:02positives of the natural game and I
1:03:04think that's that's what game should be
1:03:06it needs to be going forward
1:03:10so a look at looking at the cons of the
1:03:12natural style game it loses a lot of the
1:03:14good elements of structure game for
1:03:16example very bad for groups right why is
1:03:18it that nobody in here likes one person
1:03:20here says they're good at opening groups
1:03:21right worse for hotter girls right
1:03:24harder to get the nines and tens because
1:03:25you're asking them to evaluate you way
1:03:27too early and way too quickly in the
1:03:29interaction typically leaves the guy
1:03:31chasing here's an interesting question
1:03:32those of you who have gotten laid doing
1:03:34the natural stuff which I assume most
1:03:36people in here do something like a
1:03:37natural style game mostly yeah those who
1:03:40have gotten laid doing the natural style
1:03:41game when you do sleep with a girl does
1:03:43it feel like you're still chasing most
1:03:45of the way does that happen a lot
1:03:47we're like you're the one escalating her
1:03:48she's the one like no no no we can't or
1:03:50she's the one giving objections to going
1:03:51to your place all that kind of stuff
1:03:53she's the one flaking on the dates the
1:03:56girl of the girl definitely is not the
1:03:57one chasing typically with that kind of
1:03:59thing no no plot line is huge as well
1:04:01right the interactions they're flat
1:04:03meaning no intent right which means half
1:04:05our conversation
1:04:06or it's very obvious hey I thought
1:04:08you're cute I wanted to talk to you
1:04:10well there's not a whole lot of suspense
1:04:11over the fact that you want to [ __ ] her
1:04:12at that point right then so for that
1:04:15reason there's not a lot of like it just
1:04:17happened there's not a lot of she'll
1:04:18tell her friends oh I met this guy and
1:04:20positive things etc um so you lose the
1:04:23plot line very hard to measure and
1:04:25improve because every single interaction
1:04:27is extremely different how do you
1:04:29compare and know if you're getting
1:04:30better right it's very hard so basically
1:04:34the end result and this is what I see
1:04:36tons of in the pickup community is
1:04:38you'll get the girls that you're that
1:04:39are your level or slightly below a lot
1:04:41but I see a lot of guys running uh play
1:04:43counts but I see you guys running uh
1:04:45play counts of like sixes and sevens all
1:04:47right
1:04:48so you'll get a lot of the girls that
1:04:49you're supposed to get other girls you
1:04:51deserve to get or that a little below
1:04:52you and you'll be able to escalate on
1:04:54them because the escalation is very
1:04:55congruent but you won't be able to get
1:04:57the girl that's out of your league right
1:04:59you know everybody sounds like how do
1:05:00you get the tender like you have to
1:05:01become the ten no you don't you don't
1:05:03Reese have to convince her you're the
1:05:06ten right she just has to be convinced
1:05:08you're the ten you don't have to
1:05:08actually become it now if you aren't it
1:05:10helps of course but it's not completely
1:05:13necessary you should be able the point
1:05:15of game is get girls that you're not
1:05:16supposed to get okay so that's those are
1:05:20the cons and that's why you want that
1:05:22the best of both so what would the best
1:05:24of both look like it would look like
1:05:27first of all high opening consistency
1:05:29and immediate emotional relevance okay
1:05:32because here's the thing so let's talk
1:05:35about a little bit about direct versus
1:05:36indirect game
1:05:37what's better direct or indirect depends
1:05:41depends answer to everything in game
1:05:43depends what what's what's good about
1:05:45direct game
1:05:49cuz somebody said good cuts to the chase
1:05:51and a bunch of people said quiet things
1:05:53more assertiveness guys know what's good
1:05:56about directing it's shorter
1:05:58okay gets to the point you do get laid
1:06:01faster yeah you will get you will get
1:06:02more five-minute ladies with direct game
1:06:04than with indirect that's true so that
1:06:06sounds an indirect um and let her know
1:06:07you're like err within five minutes so
1:06:08yeah for sure so it's more to the point
1:06:11what else shows your more ballsy which
1:06:15can be good can be good for the most
1:06:17part at least up to a certain level
1:06:18okay how about it makes it easy to
1:06:23escalate right how about it introduces
1:06:26like sex and man to women topics into
1:06:28the conversation right from the get-go
1:06:29right those are the major positives of
1:06:32direct game because if you go in and you
1:06:34open direct the interactions gonna be
1:06:36direct it's gonna be mandalam and
1:06:37there's gonna be that sexual charged
1:06:39emotional nature more easily all right
1:06:41what's the downside of going direct
1:06:45exactly more frequent and immediate blow
1:06:48offs right it's high-risk high-reward
1:06:50right when it works it works really well
1:06:52but it fails more often and then
1:06:54indirect is this the opposite right so
1:06:56you're you're gonna open more
1:06:57consistently indirect but once you open
1:07:01you still have more to do you still have
1:07:03to bring the directness into the
1:07:04interaction later all right so what
1:07:05you'd like is it a combination of both
1:07:08the next thing I would say for best of
1:07:10both is that so in in typical structured
1:07:14indirect game back in the day there was
1:07:16long ass routines right so for example I
1:07:19don't know if I could still repeat
1:07:20exactly my routines from like 12 years
1:07:23ago or whatever but I had them scripted
1:07:25down to the point of when I delivered
1:07:27the store it was word-for-word the same
1:07:29every single time
1:07:30and I interrupted this story with like
1:07:33teases and and like nags and game moves
1:07:35at the exact same place every single
1:07:37time right it was like like literally
1:07:40down to the pauses the interruptions the
1:07:42intonations exactly the same delivery
1:07:45every single time right like I don't
1:07:49know I'll give you like a kind of a
1:07:51pantomime of this start of one right
1:07:52excuse me a new European or something
1:07:54actually I got to go in a minute but
1:07:55anyway um so this has been a long time
1:07:58huh so my sister got these dogs and she
1:08:01wasn't even have to like an 80s rock oh
1:08:02my god you
1:08:03not gonna get along I feel like an 80s
1:08:04rock star pop - alright and so at first
1:08:07like she was gonna name them like Duran
1:08:10and Duran but see stop looking me like
1:08:12that that's like the same name for both
1:08:13dogs I say okay so literally it's it's
1:08:17very structured very like scripted and
1:08:21like down to the the even the
1:08:23interruptions however it is engaging
1:08:25right it's fun it's interesting it's
1:08:27funny it's definitely hard not to react
1:08:28to so it has a lot of a lot of positives
1:08:30and that was not like the best rendition
1:08:32that's a 13 year old memory rendition of
1:08:36something I haven't done in over a
1:08:37decade right thank you thank you um but
1:08:41that's how that's how structured it was
1:08:42what good game nowadays probably should
1:08:45be is kind of what attractive guys do
1:08:49anyway which is they tell the same
1:08:50stories that have worked again they tell
1:08:52the same jokes that have worked they use
1:08:54a lot of the same lines that have worked
1:08:55because it's just easier it's easier not
1:08:57to reinvent the wheel but they're using
1:08:59them at the right times they're using
1:09:01him when it's congruent rather than just
1:09:03when it's forced all right and so
1:09:06basically we're to say it's a measurable
1:09:09measurable way way points basically so
1:09:11instead of being like word-for-word the
1:09:13same every single time what it should be
1:09:15is like act 4 act the same right event
1:09:18for event the same but not word for word
1:09:20so the same way that I said to you guys
1:09:23the romantic comedy thing right I said
1:09:25that all you guys have different
1:09:26romantic comedies in your minds but
1:09:29they're all kind of the same plotline
1:09:30right so if I were to write a romantic
1:09:33comedy would probably do is I'd start
1:09:34out with like here are the steps in that
1:09:36plot line and then I'll write in the
1:09:38gaps so every romantic comedy is a
1:09:40little different but they're all gonna
1:09:41hit the same way points right so what
1:09:43you wanna do a structure the way points
1:09:45but don't structure every single word
1:09:47the other thing is you need to be able
1:09:49to calibrate to the girl right so you
1:09:51can't just be blindly spitting words at
1:09:53her and here's a big one and then this
1:09:57is actually like if you're gonna write
1:09:58like of the notes you should write down
1:09:59from this escalation with
1:10:01disqualification write this one down
1:10:02right disqualify as you escalate if you
1:10:06want to escalate smoothly if you want
1:10:09the girl to be receptive to your
1:10:10advances is one of the most powerful
1:10:11techniques right so have you guys ever
1:10:13heard of the false time constraint you
1:10:16know
1:10:16it is right you know what that is that's
1:10:18hey I gotta go in a minute but anyway
1:10:19and then you sit down as you're talking
1:10:21what you're really doing is you're
1:10:23escalating sitting down while
1:10:25disqualifying hey I gotta go in a minute
1:10:27right and because you're disqualifying
1:10:29you're making the escalation not mean as
1:10:31much right or how about one move I like
1:10:34I'll take a grab a girl buy like the
1:10:35shirt of the hand I'll pull her towards
1:10:37me very sexy and as I'm pulling I'll be
1:10:39like I [ __ ] hate you right it's a
1:10:43verbal push away while I'm physically
1:10:45pulling her in what am i doing I'm
1:10:46disqualifying with I hate you
1:10:48while escalating with the physical all
1:10:51right or you know I have to get up early
1:10:55in the morning but I guess I could like
1:10:57you can come over for just you know a
1:10:58few minutes all right what am i doing
1:11:00inviting the girl home while I'm
1:11:01disqualifying right this is one of the
1:11:04most powerful techniques to actually
1:11:06escalate in a way where the girls not
1:11:07going to resist it and it's just
1:11:09something that that's used a lot in both
1:11:12structured and natural game but it needs
1:11:14to it should be a part of your game
1:11:17anything else yeah so these are
1:11:19basically the things that should be in
1:11:21that style of game okay and the way I
1:11:25want you to think of it is this I call
1:11:27it the winding forest path so think of
1:11:30structured game as is though is linear
1:11:32you have like open hook emotional
1:11:35connection physical connection close or
1:11:37something similar to that and it's this
1:11:38long drawn-out line and you think that
1:11:40you started at this side of the line and
1:11:41you have to go the entire length of the
1:11:43line to get to the end right instead
1:11:45what I want you to think of is a long
1:11:47winding line where you still are
1:11:49traveling that line but a lot of times
1:11:51you can take shortcuts so it's like this
1:11:53right so you have this long winding line
1:11:55but say you get to here and you can skip
1:11:57over that's ideal
1:11:59so say you walk up and start talking to
1:12:01girl and you have this plan of opening
1:12:02hooking emotional connection all kind of
1:12:04stuff you walk up and she's immediate
1:12:05like you're you're really hot well
1:12:08you're not gonna go through this massive
1:12:09disqualification process it's a massive
1:12:11qualification process you'd be like oh
1:12:12you're not so bad yourself and you're
1:12:15gonna just cut out all the [ __ ] in
1:12:18between okay does that make sense right
1:12:21so you you you set out with this map and
1:12:24you know the long winding path but
1:12:26you're looking for every place that you
1:12:27can cut off that
1:12:29every place you can be more efficient
1:12:30right and so in essence the structure of
1:12:33game the like the pre-scripted
1:12:35pre-canned all that kind of stuff it's
1:12:38there and it's actually it's it's a game
1:12:39plan in the back of your head but it's a
1:12:41game plan you hope to never use that
1:12:44make sense right even when I was doing
1:12:46the most structured can game my best
1:12:48interactions were the ones where I would
1:12:50do like 20 seconds of the scripted stuff
1:12:52and then she'd respond well and I'd just
1:12:54drop it all right I'd drop it and again
1:12:57cut way ahead or I wouldn't necessarily
1:12:58drop it but I'd drop like the next 10
1:12:59minutes and cut into something that
1:13:01usually would have come half an hour
1:13:02later an hour later does that make sense
1:13:04um and so this is kind of how I want you
1:13:06guys to think of game these are like the
1:13:08combination of that structure where you
1:13:10have a game plan but the flexibility
1:13:12where you're not rigid to your game plan
1:13:14so I'm gonna gonna assume there's gonna
1:13:16be a lot of questions all right because
1:13:17I just dumped it just a [ __ ] ton of
1:13:19material on you guys I mean I was like
1:13:20yeah
1:13:29tell lots of stories alright practice
1:13:33makes anything better tell lots of
1:13:34stories watch good storytellers watch
1:13:36good stand-up comedians when someone
1:13:39else tells a good story make notes of it
1:13:40any good story this is like from the
1:13:44scripted can days but any good story is
1:13:46a set of bullet points right like think
1:13:48of think of here to tell a joke
1:13:50in order for a joke to work you have to
1:13:52hit certain criteria otherwise the
1:13:54punchline won't make sense right now not
1:13:56every story has a punchline but every
1:13:57story has certain elements to make it
1:13:59work right and so you need to think of
1:14:01this story in terms of at least its
1:14:03skeleton right think what are the
1:14:04elements that make this story work and
1:14:06if it's a good story
1:14:06how can it make other stories like it
1:14:08right so become kind of a student of
1:14:10stories also work on this isn't a direct
1:14:15answer to your question but it kind of
1:14:16is work on your delivery as well as the
1:14:19story itself right there's a take the
1:14:22phrase I didn't say she stole the
1:14:25cookies you should be able to say that
1:14:27like 20 different ways with 20 different
1:14:29meanings does that make sense depending
1:14:31what word you emphasize so instead of
1:14:33like I didn't say she stole the cookies
1:14:35or I didn't say she stole the cooks I
1:14:36didn't say she stole the cook and it
1:14:38says she's told the cookies right you
1:14:40see every little difference it changes
1:14:42the meaning right and you get you get
1:14:43much more leverage and much more use out
1:14:45of your delivery as well so even a bad
1:14:48story delivered well can actually become
1:14:50to a certain extent a good story um not
1:14:59off the top of my head the making people
1:15:01talk book is just good for general
1:15:02conversation what I'd recommend more
1:15:04than books is watch good stand-up comedy
1:15:06yeah absolutely yeah
1:15:19the month reason I stopped doing groups
1:15:22is because pickup is kind of gone
1:15:24mainstream the token guy that's in a
1:15:28group kind of knows one like when you
1:15:31roll up I've been called out many times
1:15:36in a set usually with the most beautiful
1:15:40guy how to be like oh if you just did a
1:15:44man or something along those things and
1:15:49they end up kind of blowing me out so
1:15:51that's one of the reasons I stopped
1:15:53doing pretty much always okay so there's
1:16:12a number of different things there now
1:16:17she's like you sure you guys don't you
1:16:18want to like quick quick scenario
1:16:19synopsis in like group theory and stuff
1:16:21because want that yes okay we'll do that
1:16:23we'll do a little group theory and we'll
1:16:25get to we'll get to that as part of it
1:16:27as well so the idea of the idea of group
1:16:30theory isn't that like you're gonna do
1:16:32like one specific type of approach or
1:16:34one or that you have to do like an egg
1:16:36in the first ten seconds or something
1:16:37like that the idea of group theory
1:16:40basically there's there's some tenants
1:16:42first one is you have to engage everyone
1:16:44to a certain extent right and that can
1:16:46be done in a positive or negative way
1:16:48but it needs to be done but there's
1:16:50different ways so say you see a group of
1:16:52people right there's really two ways to
1:16:54engage the group one is it going to
1:16:55engage the whole group at once the other
1:16:58is to engage one or two people in the
1:17:00group and then use them immediately as a
1:17:02catalyst to engage the rest of the group
1:17:03right and either one is a valid valid
1:17:06form of group theory so one answer to
1:17:09what you just said is don't engage the
1:17:11part of the group that has the guy in it
1:17:13initially right so you could always get
1:17:15to him very quickly but he doesn't have
1:17:17to be part of it so say for example you
1:17:19have a group like five people two girls
1:17:20here and then there's a guy in like
1:17:22maybe guy
1:17:22all over here if the girl that you want
1:17:24is in that too a lot of times you could
1:17:27open the to throw a little like you know
1:17:29teasing something there or get a little
1:17:31engagement there and then as soon as you
1:17:33have that leverage as soon as you're in
1:17:34the door a little bit they may owe you
1:17:36guys you know what wait you're trouble
1:17:38but anyway how do you guys all know each
1:17:39other
1:17:39does that make sense and then you get
1:17:41all the introductions and such and that
1:17:42way the dude isn't privy to like the
1:17:46approach itself it looks more accidental
1:17:47to him and he's not involved at the
1:17:50moment where he has leverage and you
1:17:51don't because here's the thing with with
1:17:53a group of guys right with a group of
1:17:56guys they were there first right and you
1:17:58just came up and did a cold approach so
1:18:00if they have a problem with you even if
1:18:02they're in the wrong they're in the
1:18:04right as far as the group goes because
1:18:06they have history right and so with this
1:18:09situation like that where you think
1:18:10there might be a strong objection you
1:18:13almost want to open accidentally right
1:18:16so I actually have a couple of set of
1:18:17openers that I call the accidental
1:18:19openers all right one that I'll do
1:18:20sometimes it'll actually like kind of
1:18:22like back into the group by accident
1:18:23like oh [ __ ] oh sorry about that hey you
1:18:25know what you guys are actually gonna
1:18:26use a seam cool hi nice to meet you as
1:18:28long as I'm here right because think
1:18:31about that right if you walk up to the
1:18:32group with the guy in it and the guy is
1:18:35you know has an objection to you the
1:18:38girls don't know you yet and just to
1:18:39appease their friends unless they like
1:18:41just are overwhelmed with attraction for
1:18:43you they're gonna probably take you
1:18:45aside right and it's kind of a bad
1:18:47strategy for him long-term so if he's
1:18:48always the fun hater eventually they'll
1:18:50just like him but that doesn't help you
1:18:51much right now that makes sense
1:18:53but if it seems accidental or at least
1:18:57like there's not an agenda there and he
1:18:59objects now he's [ __ ] weird and now
1:19:01he's the [ __ ] fun hater right so you
1:19:03want to create a situation where if he's
1:19:06objecting he's the [ __ ] fun hater
1:19:07alright
1:19:08and the opinion opener can work somewhat
1:19:12for that sort of thing but like the
1:19:13things that are even more accidental
1:19:14than that can work as well right and I
1:19:17actually with it I set that is clearly a
1:19:19guy in a girl kind of together or where
1:19:21I think the guys gonna be on tagging
1:19:22it's think I'll try and even make it
1:19:23accidental as opposed to even like an
1:19:25opinion or even in
1:19:26correct okay so that's that's the thing
1:19:27that'll work there the other thing I'll
1:19:28do is I will choose which part of the
1:19:30group to open to not open the guy first
1:19:32and then that way once I'm getting
1:19:34introduced to the guy which can still be
1:19:35in the first like ten seconds but at
1:19:37that point I at least have a little bit
1:19:40of leverage from the girls and I'm being
1:19:41introduced by them so that he can't
1:19:43really object right so hey meet Todd
1:19:46didn't think I can't be like what an
1:19:48[ __ ]
1:19:48like you know first of all you're being
1:19:50introduced by a friend and second of all
1:19:52there's nothing no cause for you to say
1:19:53that right so that's that's something I
1:19:55would do in that case so I'm watching
1:19:57your immediate logistics is useful and
1:20:00watching your timing is very very useful
1:20:01the other really this is a very
1:20:04old-school group tactic type of thing is
1:20:05important question is how do you guys
1:20:07all know each other right how do you
1:20:09guys all know each other and you have to
1:20:10ask that to someone who likes you if you
1:20:12ask the dude in the group how do you all
1:20:13know each other like I [ __ ] all these
1:20:15hoes alright but if you ask the girl
1:20:19they go yeah no we're just friends from
1:20:20school this guy's you know he's
1:20:21obnoxious whatever and then and then
1:20:23you're okay does that make sense
1:20:24um so there's a lot of finessing you can
1:20:27do to stop from getting that reaction if
1:20:29you do get that overtly negative
1:20:31reaction what you should do probably is
1:20:34be fairly like innocence and kind of
1:20:38just like the fun happy guy right whoa
1:20:41easy there killer hi didn't catch your
1:20:43name what was it right and just be the
1:20:44fun happy whatever yeah so we have we
1:20:46have this guy who likes to you know give
1:20:47everybody [ __ ] and then we have you your
1:20:49trouble what's your name right and just
1:20:51be conversational and fun but more more
1:20:55chatty more conversational more
1:20:56assertive right there's a great um
1:20:58sexually old-school mystery line for for
1:21:03opening a group where he said the frame
1:21:04that you want it's not sexual it's
1:21:06chatty right now you went and we were
1:21:09gonna get sexual eventually with the
1:21:10girl right but the initial frame you
1:21:12want is chatty you want to be like a
1:21:13little chatterbox even again I told you
1:21:16the story of like when I was doing group
1:21:17here and very very good at it and but
1:21:19hadn't made the transition a couple
1:21:20times I pulled the hottest God dates
1:21:22with the hottest girl but then she
1:21:24thought I was gay acting a little gay in
1:21:26the first 30 seconds is not the worst
1:21:27thing in the world right it's not
1:21:29actually the worst thing the world cuz
1:21:30it's like incredibly fun incredibly
1:21:32non-threatening and incredibly happy
1:21:33right you can always show that intent
1:21:35later one on one there's a lot of things
1:21:37like that you can do in terms of
1:21:38adjusting the vibe adjusting the
1:21:40the energy and just who the guy goes
1:21:42that was an egg like if you get
1:21:44defensively I didn't nag you
1:21:46now you you're called out right yeah I
1:22:01think so you have to keep it fun though
1:22:02so I would be more likely to go over the
1:22:04top with fun and energy then you go over
1:22:06the top with negativity that makes sense
1:22:08I'm one of the best one of the best is a
1:22:11little off topic one of the best eight
1:22:13mugs I've seen in a really really long
1:22:14time
1:22:15how was that as a club in Los Angeles
1:22:18and the guy I know who's a friend of a
1:22:20friend of a friend who just pick up
1:22:22basically there was a guy that came up
1:22:24and was like trying to like act like
1:22:26like name-drop and act like he was like
1:22:28someone important and get in the guy set
1:22:29and then the guy she goes security mr.
1:22:33Herman syns beat us all again right over
1:22:37here guys we got a tough guy guys like
1:22:40okay bye
1:22:42it's [ __ ] amazing right but he
1:22:45actually delivered even better than me
1:22:46legs is just like please I was kind of
1:22:48like a little antagonistic he was just
1:22:49super like happy and fun and whatever
1:22:51yeah we got a tough guy right here tough
1:22:53guy okay guys like [ __ ] everybody the
1:22:56club was looking at me back down um so
1:22:59in that case he's definitely out
1:23:01outfitting the guy but it's fun it's fun
1:23:04it's funny it's amusing and everybody
1:23:06around it like sees it and likes it
1:23:08right and that's what you want to be you
1:23:09want to be kind of the the bully who you
1:23:13can't dislike does that make sense
1:23:14because you're not even bullying you're
1:23:16just like you're you're just coming over
1:23:18the top with more fun and more
1:23:19positivity so the point that if anybody
1:23:21hates you they truly do hate fun that
1:23:24kind of makes sense yeah I think it does
1:23:27it kind of answer your question
1:23:29cool yeah thank you
1:23:35awesome yeah cool so the best answer I
1:24:21can give you is is it working for you
1:24:23then I would say keep doing it so we're
1:24:26going out for you all right stick with
1:24:27it generally I like it be care the one
1:24:31thing I'll say with it is this this
1:24:34graph right here be careful that you
1:24:36don't get so caught up in that frame
1:24:38that you miss an easy shortcut right so
1:24:40don't be if you're getting so into like
1:24:42oh I'm gonna set up with this going
1:24:43yourself with that guy and we're gonna
1:24:44enact this frame and instead the girls
1:24:46just into you just cut through the
1:24:48[ __ ] trees and like get to that later
1:24:49part in the game don't be so caught up
1:24:51in it does that make sense cuz it's a
1:24:52nice little it's a nice little fun game
1:24:54but it's a nice little way to keep
1:24:58things like a little bit I'm not
1:25:00interested but I am interested in a good
1:25:01way to introduce the sexuality but the
1:25:04problem with it is it is very indirect
1:25:05and it could there the introduce a lot
1:25:08of chaos into the set like introduces a
1:25:10lot of other variables and random
1:25:11factors and stuff like for example if
1:25:15you get the girl introducing herself or
1:25:17getting introduced to other guys a lot
1:25:19of times the guy who didn't do the
1:25:20approach but got into the conversation
1:25:22will suddenly be super confident and
1:25:24he'll be completely non needy because he
1:25:26didn't approach and so he's gonna have
1:25:28this weird advantage over you in a weird
1:25:30way right and so that can [ __ ] you up
1:25:31sometimes there's there's various sort
1:25:33of random factors that you're
1:25:34introducing we don't have to so it's
1:25:36cool it's fun I like it too to an extent
1:25:38but just be careful about making things
1:25:41more complicated and they have to
1:25:42getting too far away from directly going
1:25:44for what you want that make sense yep
1:25:53sure yeah um so I guess the best way to
1:25:57do is to explain a couple plot lines I
1:25:59use I'll tell you two plot lines that I
1:26:00use often okay
1:26:02the plot line that I'll use with a girl
1:26:04who's like very cute but not like
1:26:06stunning stunning hot or a girl who is
1:26:09stunning hot but just seems to like me
1:26:10very very early on like seems to have
1:26:12some level of attraction or some level
1:26:14of banter with mics and she's not being
1:26:15cold right I wouldn't do this with a
1:26:17girl being cold but with a girl that
1:26:18either seems attractive or for a girl
1:26:20that's just cute but not like like up
1:26:22there out out of my league kind of what
1:26:25I would do is this whole like frame of
1:26:28we please stop being so cute I'm trying
1:26:30not to like you like I'm like look just
1:26:32I'm [ __ ] I'm so attracted my god look
1:26:34I'm like I'm holding your hand now this
1:26:35is weird like we have to stop right so
1:26:37I'd actually overtly escalate and
1:26:38overtly show that I'm very attracted and
1:26:40I would even take this this role of like
1:26:42I'm this incorrigible sex addict almost
1:26:44right that like can't help himself but
1:26:47I'm trying really hard and so the
1:26:48tension comes from the fact that I'm
1:26:50trying to resist but there's that clear
1:26:52intent right so it's not completely
1:26:53direct contrast that's the guy's just
1:26:55like hey you're cute I wanted to meet
1:26:57you so tell me all about you and I'll
1:26:58try and impress you right that's much
1:26:59less fun much less interesting much more
1:27:01boring and there's no tension right
1:27:03right that's the second one right so
1:27:06that's the first one I call that one
1:27:08sweetie game or sex addict game right
1:27:10and that's a plotline that I will use
1:27:12when it when it's going well and I want
1:27:14to sexualize and really ramp things up
1:27:16with a girl that seems to like me or a
1:27:18girl that I'm pretty confident will like
1:27:19me with a girl that's a bit harder to
1:27:22get I'll do more that romantic comedies
1:27:24sort of plotline which is I'm not so I'm
1:27:27you know I'm not so into you or there's
1:27:29something weird about you or I'm not you
1:27:31know you and I aren't gonna get along
1:27:32some kind of push away I'll push her
1:27:34away first right and I'm either pushing
1:27:36her away this actually works better in a
1:27:38group because then I can have the group
1:27:40liking me and the group reacting to the
1:27:41fact I'm pushing her away but it also
1:27:43works one-on-one as well especially
1:27:44because hot girls aren't used to being
1:27:45pushed away so what I'll do is I'll push
1:27:47her away to the points where I can where
1:27:49I sense she doesn't want to be pushed
1:27:51away anymore or the point where I sense
1:27:53she wants a
1:27:54a bit of attention from me and then I'll
1:27:56give it to her but I'll make her work
1:27:57for it and so I've established a sort of
1:27:59a set up where she's trying to impress
1:28:02me to get my attention we're trying to
1:28:04compliment me to get my attention or
1:28:05hanging out around me to get my
1:28:06attention where I pull I turn away and
1:28:08she pulls me back right so I'm setting
1:28:10up a frame where she's chasing right and
1:28:12and the idea here is that I'm interested
1:28:14in her in a way like she's in the right
1:28:16category that I would normally want to
1:28:19have sex with but there's just something
1:28:20about her that I'm not feeling right
1:28:22she's like I'll get this one
1:28:24that make sense right um so that's
1:28:26another plot line I'll use a lot um
1:28:28there are a lot of other little plot
1:28:30lines I can here's another another fun
1:28:31plot line actually if you want to play
1:28:33with it is go up to a girl and just from
1:28:35the moment one act like she's your
1:28:37ex-girlfriend she could wait oh my god
1:28:39what are you doing here it's been so
1:28:41[ __ ] long and I see you here like of
1:28:42all places right I just fully act like
1:28:45she is your ex-girlfriend and then she's
1:28:46like do I know you Oh God look I know it
1:28:48ended badly but you don't to go that for
1:28:50like come on shell out like we could we
1:28:52could at least be friends here right and
1:28:53just fully play it like congruently play
1:28:56it and again what does that do it
1:28:57introduces sexuality introduces like
1:28:59tension it makes it much more
1:29:01interesting there's there's that clear
1:29:03barrier there's that clear we've had sex
1:29:05before right so there's that clear
1:29:06sexuality because that clear barrier of
1:29:08no no no I don't wanna give a like it
1:29:09ended badly
1:29:10like I'm do you even look better than
1:29:12last time I saw you but like it ended
1:29:13badly last time I just can't get my
1:29:15heart hurt you know again I can't do it
1:29:16so there's an inherent tension inherent
1:29:19plotline so that's another example right
1:29:21so rather than like try and give you
1:29:23like the definition of plotline I think
1:29:25like just illustrating examples are like
1:29:27the better way to do and there's
1:29:28hundreds hundreds of plot lines you can
1:29:30do but those are some examples of ones
1:29:32I've seen work a lot yeah questions cool
1:29:37yeah yeah
1:29:42now when that happens I also feel
1:29:46tension
1:29:47mm-hmm I don't do game probably as often
1:29:50as you do at this point are you also
1:29:52feeling the tension because I to me he
1:29:56was more like you have more power when
1:29:58you're in control you're not feeling the
1:30:00tension what she does doesn't ever get
1:30:03to the point where so I'll give you
1:30:14maybe a better I think I disagree with
1:30:17your end goal a little bit so you're in
1:30:18go sounds like I want to not feel the
1:30:20tension and have her feel the tension I
1:30:21think your end goal should be I want to
1:30:23feel the tension and I want to enjoy
1:30:24every minute of it
1:30:25so rather than the tension being a bad
1:30:27thing where like you're not enjoying it
1:30:29like when when assets going well and I'm
1:30:31feeling that tension I get a little bit
1:30:33hard in set like I get a little happy in
1:30:35my pants it's like seriously like I know
1:30:37like I'm sitting here thinking like [ __ ]
1:30:39I'm gonna get laid tonight right because
1:30:41I feel that tension I know and I enjoy
1:30:43it isn't like as a lot of guys are
1:30:45they're scared of the tension but did
1:30:47you know what fear and excitement are
1:30:48essentially the same thing right so if
1:30:51you go on a roller coaster are you
1:30:52scared are you excited right all right
1:30:55now if you have like a gun to your head
1:30:56you probably scared right but depending
1:30:59on the framing of things depending on
1:31:00the situation like that fear can be
1:31:02excitement that fear can be a good thing
1:31:04and so I think the end goal is to not to
1:31:06not feel it you want to feel it you want
1:31:08to feel a tension but you want to enjoy
1:31:09that tension so as the girls as a girl
1:31:11cuz for the girl she enjoys it a bit but
1:31:14it also feels like nervous and a little
1:31:15icky for her at the same time as
1:31:17enjoying it you just want to be fully
1:31:18enjoying it right and because of that
1:31:20then you can hold the tension longer and
1:31:22better right but you're also congruent
1:31:24with it because if you're too detached
1:31:26from the tension that banter is gonna
1:31:28lose its that's gonna lose its spark all
1:31:31right so I think the goal isn't to be
1:31:32completely detached like you want to be
1:31:33more detached than her in in a in a pure
1:31:35like who once you the other person more
1:31:37sense absolutely but I think the real
1:31:39goal is to just be comfortable in the
1:31:41tension not have it be a problem for you
1:31:42but to actually live with it so let's
1:31:44talk about implementation because
1:31:46probably the biggest thing that I hear
1:31:48from people when I tell them like oh you
1:31:49know you can do some structured things
1:31:51in game or you can implement this
1:31:53peace in your game or whatever he's like
1:31:54how do I do it without like putting
1:31:56myself in my head how do I do it without
1:31:58getting worse before I get better at
1:31:59cetera so that's one of the big things
1:32:00with a structured game have you tried to
1:32:02try to do everything at once you will
1:32:04get worse before you get better right so
1:32:06how should you implement it properly in
1:32:08terms of how do you learn at the best
1:32:09how do you structure your night all
1:32:11those kind of things so let's talk about
1:32:12that kind of stuff so first of all we
1:32:16have a way called Jerry Seinfeld method
1:32:17anybody ever seen the movie comedian but
1:32:19with Jerry Seinfeld watch that movie
1:32:21that's one of those move that's a movie
1:32:23that if this was like 10 years ago in
1:32:25game every single one of you would have
1:32:26watched because that was like the movie
1:32:28recommended for structured game but
1:32:30basically Jerry Seinfeld comedian is
1:32:32basically Jerry Seinfeld is is creating
1:32:35a new comedy routine right he's been off
1:32:38the road for a while he was doing his
1:32:39show and he decides to go create a new
1:32:41comedy routine he's created from scratch
1:32:42so he's not using any of his old
1:32:43material he's not using any of those
1:32:44safety that's just creating a complete
1:32:46new routine and so at first he's not
1:32:49that good at first he's like kind of
1:32:50like getting like a fast reactions and
1:32:52by the end of he's that he's amazing
1:32:53but his policy and philosophy was this
1:32:56he would add one or two jokes per night
1:32:58that's it so each night he had the
1:33:01things that had worked before the things
1:33:03that he relied on the things that were
1:33:04his best game so to speak his best
1:33:06comedy game and he would mostly do that
1:33:08he'd do like 90 95 percent just doing
1:33:11his best and then he'd had one or two
1:33:13new jokes at night by doing that a
1:33:15couple different things happen number
1:33:16one he can try out new jokes and see if
1:33:18they're good all right number two we can
1:33:20try out new timing and new like
1:33:21structuring and orders of other jokes
1:33:23and then number three it's constantly
1:33:26fresh for him so every single time he
1:33:28gets on stage instead of being like well
1:33:29I'm gonna monotonous or not Leslie
1:33:31repeat this thing that I've said like 20
1:33:32times before it's fresh and it's new and
1:33:34there's a challenge all right and so it
1:33:36keeps them engaged at the same time
1:33:37right so how does this apply to learning
1:33:40game well if you're doing a more
1:33:42structured type of game instead of doing
1:33:44the same routines every single time or
1:33:46the same bits every single time or same
1:33:47general outline every single time add
1:33:49one or two little new things little new
1:33:51tweaks to it every single time to keep
1:33:52it fresh to keep it interesting if
1:33:54you're doing a non structured style of
1:33:56game which is also totally fine then I
1:33:58would say go out and do your non
1:34:00structured style of game but have one or
1:34:02two things that you're like I'm gonna
1:34:03try and say a couple push-pull lines
1:34:05tonight or I'm going to
1:34:07actively disqualify pulling the girl and
1:34:09see if I can get her to chase tonight
1:34:10right so not a bunch of things you're
1:34:12not gonna try and do 20 things you're
1:34:13not gonna be like okay today I'm gonna
1:34:15open open indirect I'm gonna use this
1:34:17line this line in this line I'm gonna
1:34:18make sure that like I back turn the girl
1:34:20three times and make sure I make her pay
1:34:22for my drink and I'm gonna make sure
1:34:24that like I get an uber not a taxi right
1:34:26like that's a lot okay
1:34:29instead one or two things and beyond
1:34:30that trust yourself trust yourself for
1:34:33wherever you are at that moment right
1:34:35and so that's a really good combination
1:34:36of practice plus performance and that's
1:34:39really important by the way performance
1:34:41in game matters everybody tell you be
1:34:43outcome independent [ __ ] yeah be outcome
1:34:45dependent the guys who say outcome
1:34:47independence it's [ __ ] because if
1:34:50your outcome independent you go for
1:34:51weeks and months without getting away or
1:34:53you just go in like self-amusing don't
1:34:55get a result that's gonna hurt your
1:34:57confidence that's gonna hurt your inner
1:34:59frame that's gonna hurt your perception
1:35:01of what you're doing in game right and
1:35:03so I mean in a lot of areas you could
1:35:06take failure failure failure failure
1:35:07along the way along the road to learning
1:35:09it wouldn't matter that much like you do
1:35:11a math problem wrong 20 times on the
1:35:12road to getting it right does really
1:35:13matter right but in game if you go out
1:35:1520 nights in a row and just get blown
1:35:17out for twenty nights in a row that's
1:35:19not just a technical thing that's
1:35:20affecting you emotionally all right so
1:35:22the problem when I say [ __ ] outcome
1:35:23independence is you need to have
1:35:25successes along the way does that make
1:35:27sense
1:35:28so you need to have an outcome that you
1:35:30can achieve and you need to have you
1:35:31know positive feedback along the way
1:35:33there's a good um I actually to be
1:35:35fragment read this book but I've heard
1:35:36it summarized it's called the winner
1:35:39effect right the idea is basically with
1:35:42animals and with people if you
1:35:44experienced winning your body releases
1:35:46different hormones than if you
1:35:47experienced losing and those hormones
1:35:49encourage you to take more risks and
1:35:51encourage you to do more of behaviors
1:35:52that are lead to future winning right so
1:35:54along the way to learning game you don't
1:35:57want to be failing failing failing you
1:35:59want to be succeeding succeeding
1:36:00succeeding and so you want to a do your
1:36:03best each and every night you're like
1:36:05throw in a couple little things but do
1:36:06your best mostly but also beyond that
1:36:09you want to be setting up metrics where
1:36:11you can win by those metrics so if
1:36:13you're in brand-new it game and you're
1:36:14metric for success is I have to get laid
1:36:16you're gonna see failure failure failure
1:36:17failure failure if you're brand new to
1:36:19game and
1:36:20metric for success is I want to stay 30
1:36:22seconds in set you're gonna see some
1:36:24success and then as I wanted to 30
1:36:26seconds in set and throw one push-pull
1:36:27line you're gonna see some success right
1:36:29and so you need to be outcome dependent
1:36:31now I couldn't pendant for a result or
1:36:33for the girl but you need me outcome
1:36:34dependent for something that's a victory
1:36:36and that's progression to you because if
1:36:37you're not seeing progress you'll stop
1:36:38gaming and that winner effects phenomena
1:36:41is gonna work against you next thing you
1:36:42want to do in terms of your game
1:36:44structured backup plan okay you want to
1:36:47have a structure backup plan remember
1:36:48this remember this model remember this
1:36:51graph super super important okay that's
1:36:55what structured backup plan is so let's
1:36:58take the opener openers a big part of
1:37:00game so you walk up and my way of
1:37:05opening my favorite way to open is just
1:37:07say whatever comes in my mind
1:37:08right however if I get here and nothing
1:37:10comes in my mind hey sorry um you looked
1:37:13really interesting I thought I'd you
1:37:14know come grace you with my presence
1:37:16right something I've said before doesn't
1:37:19make sense so I have that on the back
1:37:20burner so my goal is to never use it if
1:37:23I'm gonna go out in a session I'd prefer
1:37:24to never say that thing absolutely
1:37:26prefer to never say that thing but if I
1:37:30get up there and I'm drawing a blank
1:37:31I'll say the thing okay so that's the
1:37:33structured backup plan or for example
1:37:35remember that line um you have a lot of
1:37:39beauties come in what are you going for
1:37:41your besides you looks if I'm doing well
1:37:43I never want to use that line however if
1:37:47I absolutely can't grow a girl to
1:37:49qualify any other way
1:37:50guess what's coming out and that lines
1:37:53coming up okay so even my suggestion
1:37:56would be even if you're gonna go
1:37:57completely on cans if you're you're
1:37:58completely unstructured have that backup
1:38:01plan that you have a couple things for
1:38:04every little waypoints right
1:38:06or here's a big one say that for example
1:38:09the girls do lose her attention she's
1:38:12dragged away by her friends
1:38:13that's a tough situation do you want to
1:38:15have to come up with like a brand new
1:38:17brilliant thing every single time that
1:38:18happens no instead have a few canned
1:38:21things that you can use if in win that
1:38:23situation arises so think of it in terms
1:38:25of you see those like little fire things
1:38:26is like break glass in case of fire
1:38:28that's what the routines are that's what
1:38:29the structure is like in case of fire
1:38:31break glass
1:38:32let's just go do your thing but when you
1:38:33need it it's good to have it there when
1:38:36you're flustered and everything hits the
1:38:37fan it's good to have a back-up plan how
1:38:40do you run your night a lot of people
1:38:42say this thing about you want to go out
1:38:45for like the first you know hour or two
1:38:47of the night and just like bounce around
1:38:48the club you're not gonna get a result
1:38:49anyway and then other people will say
1:38:51like you want to go hard from the first
1:38:53set um so the question is this when
1:38:55should you stay in an interaction and
1:38:56when should you leave how do you know
1:38:58and here's the model I have in my head
1:39:00it's an idea from pokhara is called
1:39:02expected value right and we're going to
1:39:04do this it's a little mental exercise
1:39:06for you guys I'll ask you what is your
1:39:09expected value for a night or your
1:39:10expected value for like a day game
1:39:12session or whatever right so on average
1:39:14if you go out to a club or you go out in
1:39:17the daytime how many numbers you're
1:39:19gonna get what what quality of a girl
1:39:21are you gonna pull on average and with
1:39:23what percentage chance right what is
1:39:25your average result ask yourself that
1:39:27okay and this would be different for
1:39:29everybody in this room then as you're
1:39:31talking to a girl and when you ask
1:39:33yourself is my average result from
1:39:35talking to this girl higher or lower in
1:39:37my average result in the night that's it
1:39:40that's the criteria for if I stay or if
1:39:42I leave so for example for me I expected
1:39:46value model my head is if I'm gaming and
1:39:49going hard and like trying to get a
1:39:51result I would say I have like about an
1:39:52eighty eighty five percent chance of
1:39:54pulling a girl who's like an eight or
1:39:55better right which you know not like not
1:39:57a you know Victoria Secret model every
1:39:59night but like a girl that if you saw
1:40:00her in a magazine you wouldn't be like
1:40:01what the [ __ ] are you doing here
1:40:03right so pretty good chance of pulling a
1:40:07pre Agra that's if I'm going hard I'm
1:40:08going for a result and I have like
1:40:09proper like situation for me okay no
1:40:13given that if I'm talking to a girl
1:40:16who's like a seven and she's giving me
1:40:18some [ __ ] do I feel really inclined to
1:40:21stay and like try and like grind it out
1:40:23and like turn her around and make her
1:40:24like me know hey if I see a girl who's
1:40:27like my personal ten and she's giving me
1:40:28some [ __ ] do I feel inclined to grind it
1:40:30out and turn around to make her like me
1:40:31absolutely yes if I see a girl who if
1:40:34I'm with a girl who's an eight and it
1:40:35seems to be pretty on am I pretty
1:40:36inclined to stay there absolutely does
1:40:39that make sense so I'm looking at my
1:40:41expected value for the night my expected
1:40:43value in this set and that's
1:40:44what's gonna make that decision for me
1:40:46right and that's what's gonna create the
1:40:47game plan and then we'll get to this a
1:40:50little bit later so we talked about
1:40:51developing your own style that's gonna
1:40:53be the kind of last slide and that's
1:40:54gonna kind of I'll talk to you guys a
1:40:55lot about that but um your expected
1:40:57value is also gonna come down to what
1:40:59style of game you're doing right are you
1:41:00doing shotgun game we're just gonna go
1:41:02up to hey you like me no hey do you like
1:41:03we know how'd you like me yes let's go
1:41:05home that's gonna have one expected
1:41:07value whereas another type of game is
1:41:09where you're trying to finesse it and
1:41:10get like maybe the hottest girl or like
1:41:12turnaround the ones that don't like you
1:41:13so that's gonna change things too
1:41:14depending what style you're doing but
1:41:16essentially that's the idea of how long
1:41:17you should stay and how you should
1:41:18structure a night is that expected value
1:41:20model okay does that make sense so what
1:41:23do we have so far so when you go out
1:41:24mostly you want to be doing your best
1:41:26right most nights you want to be doing
1:41:28your best however you want to throw in
1:41:30one or two different things and then in
1:41:32any given set and in the night you're
1:41:34thinking expected value model what's my
1:41:36expected value from the set what's my
1:41:37expected value from the night one last
1:41:39week on the expected value model is that
1:41:42as the night gets long later or as you
1:41:44have less time left in your day game
1:41:45session your expected value goes down
1:41:47right because you have less time to get
1:41:49a hot girl so if my expected value was
1:41:5285% get an eighth or whatever then like
1:41:54if it's gone to the last hour of the
1:41:56night and I haven't taken a girl home
1:41:57maybe like you know a seven and a half
1:41:59star to look pretty good right or maybe
1:42:03an eight that's giving me a little more
1:42:04[ __ ] I'm more willing to grind it out
1:42:05and stick to stick in there rather than
1:42:07like leave and go find greener pastures
1:42:09does that make sense because the
1:42:10expected value outside of that set has
1:42:12gone down so that that factors in as
1:42:14well but that's kind of what I'm
1:42:15thinking and the great thing here is
1:42:17that it's not it doesn't allow for a lot
1:42:19of excuses
1:42:20it doesn't allow for a lot of you
1:42:21getting in your own way it doesn't allow
1:42:23for that mental masturbation of oh oh
1:42:24she's not thinker or oh you know I'm
1:42:27just not not feeling it out of state or
1:42:29whatever it's just simply like is this
1:42:31good is this good this is where I stay
1:42:33and then once you've made the decision
1:42:35to do it you're just walking to your
1:42:36best no excuses alright there's no
1:42:38excuses do your best because you've
1:42:40chosen you've chosen this is the right
1:42:41decision
1:42:42so there's no choice from there just do
1:42:44your best in that decision next idea of
1:42:47why I suggest having some structured
1:42:49things as backup is what I call freeing
1:42:51up mental RAM
1:42:52right if you have to spend all your time
1:42:55and energy coming up with exactly what
1:42:57you want to say all the time that's
1:42:59really tough that's really tough
1:43:01that's very engaging if you have things
1:43:03you've said before that you can throw in
1:43:05here and there it allows you to save the
1:43:06thing and kind of on autopilot and in
1:43:08the back of your head be thinking where
1:43:10you're at right it's something as well
1:43:14like something I learned kind of from
1:43:15public speaking as well it's like if you
1:43:16give like I've done speaking tours where
1:43:18I give the same speech in various cities
1:43:19like to the point where by the by the
1:43:21last city on the tour I know all the
1:43:23punchlines right because I've said it
1:43:24and funny enough like what you have to
1:43:27be careful of it getting stale at that
1:43:28point but the great thing is that it
1:43:30allows you to like look at the audience
1:43:31and see the reactions and add new things
1:43:33and nuances into the speech because you
1:43:35don't have to worry about what you're
1:43:36gonna say next you can kind of let that
1:43:38run on autopilot all right sube pretty
1:43:40good and then what you want to be doing
1:43:42is focusing on her right and again
1:43:44what's the goal in terms of 90/10 rule
1:43:48only as long as you have to write write
1:43:51only as long as you have to and then the
1:43:53goal is what 90/10 the other way if
1:43:58possible right you want her buying and
1:44:00you want her contributing you want her
1:44:01qualifying etc etc get her to game you
1:44:04right so that's the goal so in order to
1:44:06get her to game you you need to be
1:44:07paying attention to her you'd be seeing
1:44:09is she ready to game is she liking this
1:44:12is she not liking this is this working
1:44:14what is her blueprints all those various
1:44:16types of things right so once you free
1:44:18up that mental realm you can pay
1:44:19attention that if you're thinking oh god
1:44:20what's the next thing I'm gonna say that
1:44:22takes a lot of mental energy um one of
1:44:24the actually interesting questions that
1:44:26I get a lot because my game tends to be
1:44:29very technical right so a lot of guys
1:44:30asked me like so I do it in field
1:44:32breakdown I'm like I'm thinking this and
1:44:33this and this feel like are you really
1:44:35thinking all those things when you're
1:44:36doing the breakdown like when you're in
1:44:38the set and what's the answer yes yeah
1:44:43yes you've heard the answer before right
1:44:45so yeah yes I am thinking those things
1:44:47but I'm not thinking the basics I'm not
1:44:49thinking how do I ask Olay because I've
1:44:50escalated so many times I'm not thinking
1:44:52what's the next step between the club in
1:44:54my home because I planned that out
1:44:56before going out so I don't have to make
1:44:57it up on the spot
1:44:58right so I've done a lot of my homework
1:45:00ahead of time so that I have the freedom
1:45:02to be thinking in all those details
1:45:04I'm so freeing up mental Ram is another
1:45:05thing you want to be thinking of in
1:45:07terms of all that intent versus freedom
1:45:09of outcome it's like a lot of people
1:45:10have this paradox right showing intent
1:45:12versus being free from outcome how do
1:45:14you solve that right because if you're
1:45:15free from outcome then you're non needy
1:45:17and that's attractive but if you show
1:45:19intent you're gonna get to the points
1:45:21and you're gonna get sexual you're not
1:45:22gonna have the half hour conversation in
1:45:24nowhere right so how do you how do you
1:45:25kind of work those two together and the
1:45:28solution is this first of all you're
1:45:31never gonna be free from outcome don't
1:45:32try to be free from outcome
1:45:34don't try instead pick a good outcome
1:45:36pick an outcome that you're getting
1:45:38control of and pick any outcome that she
1:45:41would be okay with so if your outcome is
1:45:43I want to have an amazing conversation
1:45:46with you and connect with you and maybe
1:45:48something will happen right that's not
1:45:50an agenda outcome that's not an outcome
1:45:52that's like meteor weird or whatever
1:45:58what you say when you what reset outcome
1:46:00oh when you reach that outcome well then
1:46:04you have a new one right so you had that
1:46:05amazing conversation and then now my
1:46:06outcome is because it's amazing I want
1:46:09it to be to a deeper level amazing which
1:46:11is me going deep inside of her hey don't
1:46:14make sense right you can you can it's
1:46:16it's kind of like um maybe if you're
1:46:18playing sports right like you may have a
1:46:20goal to like make a certain team and
1:46:22then once you make that team you have a
1:46:23goal to win the championship once you
1:46:24win the championship you have a goal to
1:46:25make this other team then you know so
1:46:27you're gonna progress as soon as you hit
1:46:28one goal there's always the next goal
1:46:30right but what you want to have each
1:46:32step along the way is an outcome that
1:46:34you have some control over so that it's
1:46:37not this needy thing where your alliance
1:46:38on other people and one that's that's
1:46:40positive so you're not at odds with the
1:46:42world but you're like in in partnership
1:46:44with the world or with the people you're
1:46:45with does that make sense right and
1:46:47because those are ones that are gonna be
1:46:49less opposition so don't try and be out
1:46:53come free try and pick good outcomes and
1:46:56then be very intent for for those
1:46:58outcomes
1:47:00what about self-amusement versus having
1:47:04structure and direction this is an
1:47:06interesting one because a lot of people
1:47:07like well if I have is like structure
1:47:08then it's like so binding and how am I
1:47:10give yourself amuse also isn't
1:47:12self-amusement attractive right that's
1:47:15actually interesting question who here
1:47:16things that self-amusement attractive
1:47:20well kind of it is a little bit it is a
1:47:23little bit here's what's attractive
1:47:24about self-amusement if I'm willing to
1:47:27be amusing myself
1:47:28I clearly am NOT super needy about the
1:47:31reaction right so it shows a lack of
1:47:33agenda if I'm willing to be self amusing
1:47:35it shows that at times in the past when
1:47:37I've been a little bit self amusing I've
1:47:39probably received a decent response does
1:47:41that make sense so in that sense it's
1:47:44attractive however being too self
1:47:46amusing if you're violating social rules
1:47:48if you're saying awkward things if
1:47:50you're being so a lot of people do
1:47:51self-deprecating self-amusing like they
1:47:53make fun of themselves stuff amusing
1:47:55that's actually conveying a lot of
1:47:56negative things and that's not going to
1:47:57help you so self amusing per se isn't
1:48:00attractive but the the attitude of self
1:48:04amusement can lead you on average to
1:48:06doing more attractive things that kind
1:48:08of make sense um so here's what I think
1:48:11of though in terms of like being self
1:48:14amused while having structure in your
1:48:15game first of all if you're bored with
1:48:17telling a story don't tell it right you
1:48:20don't have to tell the story just
1:48:21because it worked before you don't have
1:48:23to tell a joke cuz it worked before you
1:48:24do have to use a line cuz it worked
1:48:25before use what you want to use right
1:48:27that said it doesn't hurt to have those
1:48:29solutions in the can anyway right you
1:48:31can always have them and not use them
1:48:32that's number one number two and this is
1:48:35the the last two two and three here
1:48:37become fascinated by a game and then
1:48:38self engagement this is how I have
1:48:41stayed kind of always self amusing game
1:48:44alright I think of myself as a student
1:48:45of the game I think of myself as like
1:48:47almost like a researcher of game and
1:48:49like I look at the game itself as
1:48:50beautiful like if I say something to
1:48:53grow and I watch her reaction it's a
1:48:54little bit different that's like a
1:48:56little miracle of nature to me alright
1:48:58it's a new like little revelation right
1:49:00and I'm fascinated by it I'm truly truly
1:49:03fascinated by it or when I when I want
1:49:05to go try some new like line or try some
1:49:07new thing or a new idea in game
1:49:09I can't wait I can't I'm like oh my god
1:49:12it's like Christmas morning get to try
1:49:13this new thing and see the reaction
1:49:14right cuz I'm actually I'm fascinated by
1:49:17the girls but I'm fascinated by the game
1:49:18itself right and because of that I'm
1:49:22always not self amused but self engaged
1:49:25right I'm always present and I'm always
1:49:28engaged in what I'm doing I'm oh I'm
1:49:29always focused and I'm always you know
1:49:31I'm always there and so that idea of
1:49:35self amusements especially for like
1:49:36introverted guys like self-amusement to
1:49:38me is a little weird like I don't walk
1:49:40around like oh yeah like I'm not I'm not
1:49:42a big bouncy laughing like clown center
1:49:45of attention type of guy naturally right
1:49:47so I'm not naturally like mr. amused
1:49:49anyway but what I am is I'm very focused
1:49:51and engaged right in the same way that
1:49:53like if you're reading a good book
1:49:55you'll be very zoned in and very focused
1:49:57but it's not this like loud crazy thing
1:49:59but you're engaged right in the same way
1:50:02if I'm doing if I'm talking to a girl
1:50:04I'm just very engaged and very
1:50:05fascinated by her alright so I say get
1:50:07rid of the words self-amusement they can
1:50:08turn into self engagement okay um okay
1:50:12now this is probably the next couple
1:50:15slides are probably the biggest thing in
1:50:18terms of merging the two styles of game
1:50:20how many people here have either watched
1:50:21or done improvisational comedy
1:50:23a couple people okay watched it how many
1:50:26who have done it couple okay cool I
1:50:29highly recommend it like of all the
1:50:31things you can do outside of game to
1:50:32make your game better improvisational
1:50:34comedy is probably the single best one
1:50:35you can do okay um but so what you want
1:50:39to look at in terms of game in the
1:50:41structure don't think of it in terms of
1:50:42room right I did this thing where I
1:50:43stood gave you my kind of my pickup
1:50:45routine from 13 years ago and it's like
1:50:47word-for-word interruption for
1:50:48interruption don't think that way and
1:50:50did think about waypoints think about
1:50:53different things are going to happen
1:50:54between the girl I'm gonna walk up and
1:50:56where I start a conversation there's
1:50:58gonna be some sexual tension and some
1:51:00pushing away going on we're gonna
1:51:02resolve and aside we like each other but
1:51:03not completely I'm gonna seem a little
1:51:06hard to get and like high-value but I'm
1:51:08gonna get to know her I'm gonna
1:51:09structure a way for us to go home
1:51:11right that's gonna happen in every
1:51:12interaction that make sense and so I'm
1:51:14thinking how do I get to the next point
1:51:16but I'm not thinking what's all the
1:51:17material in between right and the best
1:51:20example I've ever ever seen of this is
1:51:21from improvisational
1:51:23there's a for an improvisational comedy
1:51:25show when I was taking classes there's
1:51:27this like structure it's called like a
1:51:29herald but basically what you're gonna
1:51:31do is you're gonna go out on stage and
1:51:33you're gonna player on some ideas and
1:51:34they're gonna do three scenes about
1:51:35those ideas and there you do some random
1:51:37scene that that plays on those three
1:51:39then you can do three more scenes about
1:51:40those ideas and then you're gonna do a
1:51:42random scene then they give you one
1:51:43scene that brings it all together and
1:51:44that like makes this very cohesive very
1:51:46interesting show now going in every
1:51:49single time I'll watch a show I know
1:51:50exactly how it's gonna go scene by scene
1:51:51I know the plotline
1:51:53all right that's plotline but I have no
1:51:56idea what any of those scenes are gonna
1:51:58be about I have no idea what word the
1:52:00audience is gonna shout out I have no
1:52:02idea who's gonna be in any of those
1:52:03scenes right but I know every single one
1:52:07what comes next what comes next what
1:52:08comes next and so knowing that gives me
1:52:10like if I'm performing gives me safety
1:52:12and the ability to like take risks
1:52:14because I know that there's always this
1:52:15structure to fall back on does that kind
1:52:17of make sense and think of it the same
1:52:20way in game right so it's not like I'm
1:52:21gonna say this one line and in this
1:52:23story and then this line and then the
1:52:24story and then this line instead it's
1:52:25there's gonna be this dynamic between me
1:52:28and the girl and then after that there's
1:52:29gonna be this dynamic and this dynamic
1:52:31and this dynamic and because I know
1:52:34those next steps it gives me the the
1:52:35liberty to try things and take risks
1:52:38because I know where to bring it back if
1:52:39they mess up and I know those risks are
1:52:42risks that are moving in the right
1:52:43direction instead of the wrong direction
1:52:44is that kind of make sense so that's the
1:52:47way I look at game is rather than look
1:52:49at it as like a stand-up comedy where
1:52:51everything is planned out a look at has
1:52:52improv comedy where the structure is
1:52:54very very planned out but the content is
1:52:57completely free right and then even
1:53:00within that though with the improv
1:53:02comedy analogy you still learn skills
1:53:05for all that structure right so you may
1:53:07learn to do voices and that makes you
1:53:09better at that structure you may learn
1:53:10to pantomime and that makes you better
1:53:12at that structure and improvisational
1:53:13comedy in game you learn to do push-pull
1:53:16that makes you better you learn how to
1:53:18qualify a girl you learn how to read our
1:53:19blueprint it makes you better so it's
1:53:21all coming down to this structure and
1:53:23then you're learning the skills to fill
1:53:24in that structure and again every single
1:53:26set just like any improv show every
1:53:28single one is completely different but
1:53:31they're also all completely the same
1:53:32because that underlying structure and
1:53:34the base techniques you're you
1:53:36are the same every single time does that
1:53:38kind of make sense right and at any
1:53:40point if you're lost you have a
1:53:42repertoire to fall back on okay so let's
1:53:46talk about finding your own style how do
1:53:48you find your style in games we've
1:53:51talked about well how many different
1:53:53styles again we talked about the you
1:53:54know the attractive characteristics you
1:53:56talked about the double your dating
1:53:57stuff speeds deduction stuff structured
1:53:59game three different like two like two
1:54:02and a half different forms and
1:54:03unstructured kind of natural style game
1:54:05how do you find your own style of game
1:54:07alright first thing I would say is
1:54:10imitate before you innovate alright so
1:54:12learn what works learn from people that
1:54:14have done things before and don't just
1:54:16try things randomly try things from
1:54:18people that work so for example if you
1:54:20guys have seen some of my infield and
1:54:22like you think that what I'm doing is
1:54:23good and you'd like to do it be more
1:54:26likely to try something that you've seen
1:54:27me do then something completely random
1:54:29now that does not mean to treat me as an
1:54:32absolute guru it doesn't mean that just
1:54:34because I said something you should say
1:54:36it or just because I did something you
1:54:37should do it especially without
1:54:39understanding the context alright
1:54:41there's one that I remember there's um a
1:54:43video I put out a long time ago where I
1:54:46was running up to the girl and she was
1:54:48like being very hard to open and I said
1:54:50like why I've never burned this many
1:54:51calories to talk to a girl before as I'm
1:54:52like running up next to her right and in
1:54:55that context it made total sense it
1:54:57works really well then I had a program
1:54:59where I had a student come in and that
1:55:01was his default opener he just run up to
1:55:04the girls be like wow I've never burned
1:55:05this many calories and talked to a girl
1:55:06before right which one is completely out
1:55:09of context and doesn't make sense half
1:55:10the time but - it's actually inherently
1:55:12needy unless she's already been like
1:55:14obnoxiously hard to open right and so it
1:55:17fundamentally was was wrong and then he
1:55:19said I got that from you no you didn't
1:55:22you didn't get that from me because
1:55:23that's not how I did it alright so
1:55:26imitate stuff you see from me I'm gonna
1:55:28say you stuff you see from other guys
1:55:29that are that that seem to be doing well
1:55:31but don't be blind
1:55:32the end result like the end judge of any
1:55:35technique is you that make sense you are
1:55:38the end decider if it works if it's
1:55:40worked for every single pick-up coach in
1:55:42the world and it doesn't work for you
1:55:43put on the back burner or something to
1:55:45maybe try again later but as long as
1:55:47it's not working for you don't [ __ ]
1:55:48do it okay does that make sense so
1:55:51imitate but imitate with intelligence
1:55:53imitate and try it and see if it works
1:55:56for you and see if it's can grow up for
1:55:57you because different people do have
1:55:58different different styles of game and
1:55:59then what's going to happen once you've
1:56:00imitated enough things you'll start
1:56:02innovating you'll start coming up with
1:56:03your own things that are the similar
1:56:05structure to the things that it works so
1:56:06I'm gonna say before you innovate and
1:56:07then the biggest thing I say is your
1:56:09style should get you to your goal I'm
1:56:11not gonna use names right now if said I
1:56:13want to name-drop different pick up guys
1:56:14but every single guy who I know who's
1:56:17good in pick up they have different
1:56:19outcomes in mind from pick up and their
1:56:22structure and their strategy gets them
1:56:25their outcome right so for example I
1:56:27know one guy who just wants get laid a
1:56:29ton it doesn't really care very much
1:56:30about the quality and so he has kind of
1:56:32a shotgun method he's willing it at the
1:56:34first sign of any kind of like
1:56:36resistance or rejection to be like [ __ ]
1:56:37next and whatever and he's very
1:56:39polarizing very abrasive and it works
1:56:41very well for him alright
1:56:42other guys want only the hottest girls
1:56:45and they don't care about anything less
1:56:47than a 10 and so they're willing to stay
1:56:48in a set from very very long times and
1:56:50try really really hard they're willing
1:56:52to do a lot of like homework before the
1:56:55set get social proof on their side do
1:56:57things like that and that works well for
1:56:58them but they don't don't get quite as
1:57:00much volume right and that's their style
1:57:02that works for them I know one guy who's
1:57:05really good and pick up who actually
1:57:07probably cares more about how much he
1:57:09can get away with then he cares about
1:57:11actually getting laid and so he has a
1:57:13style that's all about getting away with
1:57:14a lot of [ __ ] right and that works for
1:57:17him okay the point is that whatever your
1:57:20style is should help you get your goal
1:57:22so in order to determine your style the
1:57:25first thing you need to ask yourself is
1:57:26what's your goal what is it you actually
1:57:28want about game and this is something
1:57:30that I've said this many events and I
1:57:32guarantee people don't do this what is
1:57:35it you actually want what are you
1:57:36getting game for what is your end result
1:57:38do you want lots of girls or do you want
1:57:41one special girl do you want to have
1:57:43lots and lots of sex with lots of girls
1:57:44or do you want to just have sex you know
1:57:46every now and again with girls then you
1:57:49think are a little more special right do
1:57:52you want to have multiple long-term
1:57:53relationships or do you wanna have
1:57:54serial monogamous relationships do you
1:57:57have a particular ethnicity or body type
1:57:59that you like
1:58:00right do you want your girls educated or
1:58:03do you not give a damn right there are
1:58:06all these different things all these
1:58:07different factors and they matter
1:58:08because it's going to determine a lot in
1:58:11your game so the first step in what your
1:58:12style is what type of girl do you want
1:58:14next step in what's your style is what
1:58:17type of interaction do you want do you
1:58:19like really like super charge like super
1:58:22flirty sexual interactions some guys do
1:58:24some guys get nervous about that they
1:58:26don't like it or do you like really like
1:58:28wordy kind of talk talk talk kind of
1:58:30interactions or you really spend your
1:58:31time and get to know a girl some guys
1:58:33really like that if you want really
1:58:35sexually charged interactions should you
1:58:37a more direct or more indirect probably
1:58:39a little more direct if you want really
1:58:41conversational interaction should go
1:58:42more indirect and more direct more
1:58:45indirect right and along with that next
1:58:47question is what are you best at are you
1:58:50best at conversations or are you best at
1:58:52that flirty stuff right so all of this
1:58:54is going to play in however whatever
1:58:56style you choose there are gonna be
1:58:59certain elements that I think are always
1:59:01going to be the case okay number one
1:59:04you're going to have to continuously
1:59:06implement trial and error you might have
1:59:08to continuously take what you're doing
1:59:09tweak things try things learn so
1:59:12whatever style you adopts you have to be
1:59:14able to do that you have to be able to
1:59:15learn and grow okay
1:59:17whatever style you adopt you're gonna
1:59:19have to hit those three trigger points
1:59:21that I talked about you're gonna have to
1:59:22have access you're gonna have to have
1:59:24attraction you're gonna have to have
1:59:25follow-through so make sure that
1:59:27whatever style you have takes care of
1:59:29all those right most likely if you're
1:59:32talking about a style where you're
1:59:33meeting strangers as opposed to like a
1:59:34social circle style you're probably
1:59:36going to have to lead with some level of
1:59:38like attraction and then follow it with
1:59:39some kind of comfort right that's
1:59:41probably a given right whatever style
1:59:44you you'd adopt there has to be some
1:59:47congruence about your closing all right
1:59:48whatever style you adopt there probably
1:59:50has to be a plot line right there has to
1:59:52be some kind of a plot line or a
1:59:54narrative so these elements are always
1:59:56gonna be the case whatever plot whatever
1:59:58style you adopt it's going to help you
1:59:59if you have a few canned things you can
2:00:02go back to but whatever style you adopt
2:00:04it's going to help you if you're not so
2:00:06structured you can't pay attention to
2:00:07the girl
2:00:08right so these Conte's these elements
2:00:10are always gonna be the case but your
2:00:12particular style is gonna be uniquely
2:00:14your honor and it all starts with what
2:00:16do you want and who you are
2:00:17and then it starts with understanding
2:00:18all of these styles and knowing how to
2:00:20implement them okay so with that said I
2:00:24wouldn't say that all of you can like go
2:00:26snap your fingers and go have a perfect
2:00:28game style but I would say hopefully you
2:00:30guys have learned a lot about what the
2:00:31different styles are you've learned a
2:00:33lot about what the elements that make
2:00:34games successful are and hopefully you
2:00:36have all the tools now as you go take
2:00:38action to go learn and implement a style
2:00:40that will work well for you I would tell
2:01:01myself two things I would say I would
2:01:07say one never stop learning like never
2:01:08get arrogance and think you know it all
2:01:10because there are definitely periods
2:01:11where anybody and when there's an
2:01:14established kind of style of game that
2:01:16everybody is doing it's very easy to
2:01:18think it's all been discovered it hasn't
2:01:20a lot of B that's nothing I've heard a
2:01:21lot lately Oh everything in games been
2:01:23discovered oh no it hasn't
2:01:25not even close okay so one thing that I
2:01:28would tell myself is a twenty already
2:01:30knew I didn't know [ __ ] but like I would
2:01:33tell myself no matter how much you
2:01:34eventually think you know [ __ ] you still
2:01:36don't know [ __ ] so that's one and the
2:01:38other thing I would be saying is never
2:01:41forget how fun this is
2:01:42never forget how fun this is because for
2:01:44me in particular having done game as a
2:01:46profession there definitely are times
2:01:49where I can feel like work like you're
2:01:50dealing with a frustrating student or
2:01:52like when you when you have to leave a
2:01:55hot girl to go teach like the harbor
2:01:56wants to go home with you have to go
2:01:57back to go teach your genetics are like
2:02:00screaming at you like your genes are
2:02:02like what the [ __ ] are you doing to me
2:02:04Todd
2:02:05but it's good to keep in perspective
2:02:07that game really is fun game really is
2:02:09beautiful and there are times over my
2:02:12gaming career that I've fallen in and
2:02:14out of love with game and I can tell you
2:02:17even even when your results aren't as
2:02:19good
2:02:20being in love with game and having fun
2:02:22is better than being out of love and
2:02:24getting better results but that's that
2:02:26thank you guys so much for coming out
2:02:29[Applause]
2:02:40you

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