TELEFON ANRUF PRANK BINGO #12 — Transcript

Full transcript

1. 0:00Chat, welcome back to a new Phone Prank
2. 0:04Bingo. Today the punishment is going to
3. 0:07be especially bottomless, because I
4. 0:09played Phone Bingo today with an old
5. 0:11internet friend of mine and this stupid
6. 0:14son of a saved an old
7. 0:15embarrassing photo of me that you could
8. 0:17find on Google back then and threatens
9. 0:20me every time to leak this photo.
10. 0:23That's why I thought to myself, if I
11. 0:25lose this Phone Bingo today, the most
12. 0:28embarrassing photo of me from the
13. 0:30internet will be leaked. I'm scared.
14. 0:33Let's start.
15. 0:34Oh my God, you look ugly, bro. Oh my
16. 0:36God, you are so chop, dude. Dude, are
17. 0:39you r—you are so chop, dude. Bro,
18. 0:41every time I see you, you get uglier
19. 0:44and uglier.
20. 0:45Rock, paper, scissors. Dude, I hate
21. 0:50starting. I hate starting. How do I
22. 0:57start? Good day.
23. 0:59Hello. Good boy Schelling, my name is.
24. 1:01I am looking for children's books.
25. 1:03These are new editions. I want to get a
26. 1:07few books for my child, they are sort
27. 1:09of new meme books from TikTok. The
28. 1:13first one is called Merzle Egg Book. Is
29. 1:16that available there yet?
30. 1:20Um, one moment, I'll check.
31. 1:23Yes.
32. 1:25Can you tell me again what it's called?
33. 1:27Um, well, Merz Lck Egg Book, but the
34. 1:32Merz is abbreviated, so Mrz Lck Egg.
35. 1:39It's like a new meme edition.
36. 1:42Yeah, nah, we unfortunately don't have
37. 1:43anything like that. I'm sorry.
38. 1:45Because it's coming out soon and my son
39. 1:47really wants it to show his class. It's
40. 1:51some kind of youth trend right now. Do
41. 1:53you, I uh, I would ask you, because
42. 1:55these are a few new editions. Do you
43. 1:57have a Drachenlord book?
44. 2:00Uh, Drachenlord, the YouTuber?
45. 2:04Yes, exactly. These are like meme books
46. 2:06. The company that makes them is called
47. 2:08Foot Picture Book. It's some kind of
48. 2:11new company that makes meme books from
49. 2:14internet memes.
50. 2:15Nah, we unfortunately don't have
51. 2:17anything like that.
52. 2:18Can you maybe check the system, because
53. 2:19they are very new. They are currently
54. 2:22being delivered to libraries.
55. 2:24Yeah, we unfortunately don't have them.
56. 2:25I'm sorry.
57. 2:27And the Bladex book?
58. 2:30Okay. Um, can you perhaps give me the
59. 2:33ISBN?
60. 2:34Uh, wait, I have to check on the
61. 2:36internet real quick. One moment. Oh. I
62. 2:40had adult movies open. Um, are you
63. 2:45actually an AfD voter?
64. 2:54No, unfortunately there's no ISBN for
65. 2:56it yet.
66. 2:57Yeah, then we won't be able to stock it
67. 2:59here either.
68. 3:00And the Tim Got new paperback? Do you
69. 3:02have that? Um, no. Um, otherwise, you
70. 3:06are welcome to send further inquiries
71. 3:08to our email address. Have a nice day.
72. 3:10I'm going to take a crap in your Harry
73. 3:12Potter section.
74. 3:14Okay.
75. 3:15No, just kidding.
76. 3:18Hey, bro, the last point definitely
77. 3:19doesn't count.
78. 3:20Huh, what are you talking about? H, who
79. 3:22?
80. 3:23That didn't, it didn't, she was already
81. 3:25hanging up. She was already doing that
82. 3:27thing where I throw it into the room.
83. 3:29Good boy. So, you know?
84. 3:30Yes. And
85. 3:31that is the bad point.
86. 3:33Well, Chat. Yeah, Chat, do you think so
87. 3:36too? It counts, of course it counts.
88. 3:38Come on, bro, it counts. You can always
89. 3:40do it, bro, until they hang up, bro.
90. 3:42It's always like that, you know, the
91. 3:44cherry on top at the end.
92. 3:46Welcome to the customer service
93. 3:48department of Bücher. Könner with Nat
94. 3:53from customer service.
95. 3:55A wonderful good day, Mr. Natz, my name
96. 3:58is, and the thing is, I need some
97. 4:00advice. Am I in the right place? Please
98. 4:03.
99. 4:04Yes, perfect. So it's about, you need
100. 4:06advice on that. Exactly. Well, I am a
101. 4:08history teacher at a secondary school
102. 4:11and I just want my son to learn German
103. 4:13history in general. M
104. 4:17Exactly.
105. 4:18Oh, you have to ask her for that,
106. 4:20please. Yes, at this time I can't put
107. 4:22you through either. That's before
108. 4:24asking, right? Yes, exactly.
109. 4:27But in what, I mean, how could you
110. 4:29maybe help me briefly? Well, basically,
111. 4:33well, when it comes to history, the
112. 4:35schoolbook department, they are it's
113. 4:40just general, it's not about school
114. 4:42right now, but in general, I want my
115. 4:43son to learn German history, just any
116. 4:45literature, like, for example, the
117. 4:47Drachenlord book, which is relatively
118. 4:48new right now. That's a documentary
119. 4:51about a YouTuber who, um, yeah, has
120. 4:53already written German, well, German
121. 4:55history.
122. 4:56Mhm. Exactly.
123. 4:58So. I'll go in there and see what comes
124. 5:00out for German history on site. So,
125. 5:04what's going on, 20 euros from Manfred?
126. 5:08"The Young Reader from 12 Years Old:
127. 5:11From the German Reunification to
128. 5:13Charlemagne to Today," that would fit,
129. 5:15for example.
130. 5:17To be honest, the title sounds like a
131. 5:19textbook to me. I mean, we know what
132. 5:21the Germanic tribes were like back then
133. 5:23, I don't know if I want to put my son
134. 5:25through that, to be honest.
135. 5:28That's why, I mean, ultimately, I don't
136. 5:30want to provide him with an erotic book
137. 5:31or anything, he should just sort of
138. 5:34Yes,
139. 5:35exactly, like
140. 5:35I said it like that, they have the plan
141. 5:38, I can take a look at that too.
142. 5:40Okay. Yes. um, since I have them right
143. 5:42there anyway, I'll definitely check it
144. 5:45out on-site. But I bought a book at
145. 5:47Thalia recently and the problem is, the
146. 5:49pages were all stuck together, I don't
147. 5:50know what happened there. So, um, I
148. 5:54opened it and just thought, what is
149. 5:57this white liquid inside this book? It
150. 6:00was just really weird. I have a feeling
151. 6:02, well, like someone put something in
152. 6:05there or something. Pissed in the book,
153. 6:08or did something to it. Honestly, I
154. 6:11don't know what happened there. I was
155. 6:13so in shock, to be honest, that I even
156. 6:16forgot my child. It was that bad for me
157. 6:18, to be honest.
158. 6:19What? When did you buy it?
159. 6:21When?
160. 6:21When did you buy it? When? Exactly.
161. 6:23Oh, that was about a week ago now.
162. 6:26A week ago. Take it back. You can just
163. 6:29take it back. Exactly. With the receipt
164. 6:31.
165. 6:31Yes, but you have to imagine, I opened
166. 6:33it like a goodbye, basically. I mean, I
167. 6:35opened the pages and it was all sticky,
168. 6:37it was really gross. So, is there maybe
169. 6:39a voucher as compensation?
170. 6:43Well, you have to ask them there. I
171. 6:45can't look into that right now. The
172. 6:48colleagues on-site will check and see
173. 6:50what's going on with it. Then you can
174. 6:52ask if you can get a voucher or not.
175. 6:54But I can't say in advance, I can't
176. 6:56check that. Exactly.
177. 6:57Be honest, are you an AfD voter?
178. 6:59Because only someone who votes for the
179. 7:00AfD argues like that.
180. 7:05I haven't seen the book myself. What
181. 7:07can I say?
182. 7:11Uh, should I tell them they can get a
183. 7:12voucher?
184. 7:13Should I tell them they can get a
185. 7:15voucher? Yes, exactly that. I want a
186. 7:17clear answer.
187. 7:19That's what I'm telling myself. You'll
188. 7:20have to have the colleagues check there
189. 7:23and they can tell you if you can get it
190. 7:25or not.
191. 7:26I have the feeling you're committing
192. 7:28time fraud at work. I think you're
193. 7:29committing time fraud because it can't
194. 7:31be that you know so little about your
195. 7:33own, I mean, where you work. That just
196. 7:35can't be. Now assume, for example, the
197. 7:39day before yesterday a customer called
198. 7:41us and said, I wanted to return the
199. 7:42book. Yes, I said. You wanted to return
200. 7:45it. Come on with the complaining. And
201. 7:47then she told me, my child wrote their
202. 7:50name in the school book. Can I—be
203. 7:52quiet, should I return this now? Who is
204. 7:55going to buy that? Nobody. Exactly,
205. 7:57right? Yes,
206. 7:58but it can't be that I open a book and
207. 8:00I just feel like I'm in an adult film
208. 8:01where everything, let's put it bluntly,
209. 8:03has been messed up.
210. 8:06Can you stop groaning? I'm not even
211. 8:08groaning. Ah. I'm not doing that either
212. 8:10. Daddy. Do you know if he got his
213. 8:15voucher or not? That decision isn't
214. 8:18ours. I'm not the decision-maker.
215. 8:21Yeah, what are you even, then?
216. 8:23Customer service. Customer service.
217. 8:25You know what? You're someone who poops
218. 8:27in the Harry Potter section. On the
219. 8:29books. That's who you are. That's the
220. 8:31kind of person you are. Then you sell
221. 8:32people a book like that. What is that
222. 8:34all about? Uh, there is in.de. You can
223. 8:37write your complaints there and you can
224. 8:39also find out if you can get a voucher
225. 8:41or not. Info.de. Well, he
226. 8:45cook—take photos, send an email with
227. 8:47the photo and then you can ask for a
228. 8:50voucher. Yes.
229. 8:51Yeah, but honestly, even you don't
230. 8:53believe that it will do anything. Look,
231. 8:55you know what? I recommend the Merzleck
232. 8:57egg book to you. It fits you perfectly.
233. 9:01So at this moment, please stop being
234. 9:02annoying. No, you're annoying me. No,
235. 9:06no.
236. 9:09Yo, why are you so good at this crap?
237. 9:1217 points, guys.
238. 9:20Hello, Klaus Schubert here from Tube
239. 9:22One Management, and I have a question
240. 9:25regarding a YouTube documentary with
241. 9:28you. Maybe the YouTube channel
242. 9:30Tomatolix means something to you. And
243. 9:34by email, if you have a request, yes,
244. 9:36just send it to [email protected]. Okay.
245. 9:40Yes. No, because we would be willing to
246. 9:44offer you a sum of money to speed it up
247. 9:46a bit, because email correspondence
248. 9:49usually takes a while. I can write it,
249. 9:52yes.
250. 9:53Oh, just lick my bald head. Why don't
251. 9:55you have a quick moment? I just want to
252. 9:57sell my ass here in the club and you
253. 9:59have no time? Bro. Yeah, dude, dude,
254. 10:04I'm so unlucky, man. Dude, but bro,
255. 10:07dude, every time they are so impatient
256. 10:10in the GClub, bro. Dude, that's just
257. 10:12pure bad luck. Chat.
258. 10:14Have you called several times?
259. 10:15Yeah, in the last episode, they were
260. 10:17impatient there too.
261. 10:19I kn—that's why I thought I knew you
262. 10:22were doing that in videos too. I am—I
263. 10:24am for real pissed now, man. Get ready.
264. 10:28Yo dude, just set the scene. Mature.
265. 10:34Hello.
266. 10:35A wonderful good day to you. My name is
267. 10:37Liebold. I have a question.
268. 10:40Yes, go ahead. Exactly. So, I'm a
269. 10:43typical gay club goer. I mean, I go
270. 10:45regularly to clubs in different cities
271. 10:48and I stumbled upon yours. I noticed it
272. 10:50back during Covid-19, but unfortunately
273. 10:53, I haven't had a chance to visit yet.
274. 10:56Could I perhaps ask a few questions
275. 10:58just to make sure that everything—I
276. 11:00I'm unfortunately working alone, and I
277. 11:01don't have any time right now. Sorry.
278. 11:04Oh,
279. 11:06I've got a bit to do. Sorry.
280. 11:07Is Johnny Sins in the house or what?
281. 11:10Excuse me?
282. 11:10Is Johnny Sins in the house or what? I
283. 11:12don't
284. 11:13even know him. What is that supposed to
285. 11:14be? Well, he's here often, I've heard
286. 11:17he's here a lot and I know whenever
287. 11:19he's here, it's always very, very
288. 11:20crowded. He's known for licking the
289. 11:23bald head. He's a very famous performer
290. 11:26and that's why I thought maybe he might
291. 11:28be on-site right now. Nope, I don't
292. 11:31know him and I really have to hang up
293. 11:32now. I've got work to do.
294. 11:34Okay. Nintendo. Too bad.
295. 11:37Yeah. Yeah. Hey chat, bro, I told you,
296. 11:41dude, gay clubs are always, bro,
297. 11:42they’re so impatient. He
298. 11:44is working alone, after all. That was a
299. 11:46bit of a problem.
300. 11:48Round. Hello.
301. 11:52Hello, Schubert is my name. I would
302. 11:55like to attend your yoga class with my
303. 11:58partner. The thing is, I'm completely
304. 12:02new to this yoga stuff, so I don't
305. 12:05really know my way around yet and I'd
306. 12:08love to do yoga with my partner. Do you
307. 12:11have any partner exercises there?
308. 12:15Uh, not directly. No.
309. 12:18Because I looked it up a bit on the
310. 12:20internet, and there's like a candle
311. 12:23pose or fisting positions, and I've
312. 12:25only seen a few partner exercises, but
313. 12:28I'm not sure if there are that many in
314. 12:31yoga in general, because we'd love to
315. 12:34do it together, you know, combine it
316. 12:37with yoga.
317. 12:38Oh, I see. No, we don't do that. Here,
318. 12:40everyone basically does yoga
319. 12:41individually. Yes. Okay. And would a
320. 12:44guy be allowed in women's yoga, because
321. 12:47I
322. 12:48Yes, you can. Yes, you can do that.
323. 12:50Because I identify as transgender and
324. 12:54my partner is a man.
325. 12:56Well, you can, man, woman, you know,
326. 12:58diverse, everyone is welcome here.
327. 13:00There are, like, yoga exercises for
328. 13:02specific things, right?
329. 13:04What do you mean? My partner has a
330. 13:08metabolic disease and often gets
331. 13:10diarrhea, so would it be possible to
332. 13:13cure that somehow through yoga?
333. 13:17I don't know. You could try it out.
334. 13:19Because I heard that you can somehow
335. 13:21heal organs through yoga.
336. 13:25No, well, healing organs through yoga,
337. 13:27that's a bit far-fetched, right? You
338. 13:32can support health processes, of course
339. 13:33, right? But that you can actually heal
340. 13:39organs with yoga, I can't let that
341. 13:42stand. Yeah.
342. 13:43Yeah. No, because I also heard about
343. 13:46hormone yoga and stuff, and someone on
344. 13:49YouTube said it's supposed to be good
345. 13:52for the liver, so that's why I
346. 13:55connected the two. But is it possible
347. 13:58to perhaps take a private yoga lesson
348. 14:02to train with you privately, because
349. 14:05we'd really prefer to only do partner
350. 14:08exercises.
351. 14:09Yeah, I don't know. You can send an
352. 14:12email about what exactly you're
353. 14:13planning? Yes.
354. 14:14So we would like to...have you heard of
355. 14:17the 69 position?
356. 14:21Yes. Yes. Are you trying to mess with
357. 14:23me or what?
358. 14:25No, there is...I'll just get to the
359. 14:27point, we want it to be a bit more
360. 14:30sexual, like with doggy style, and we'd
361. 14:32also want to do the human centipede.
362. 14:36There is stuff like freaky yoga, hot
363. 14:38yoga.
364. 14:39Mhm. Yeah, that's not possible. No.
365. 14:41Okay. Not at all.
366. 14:43No, not at all, really.
367. 14:44Yeah. Damn. Yeah, because I'm actually
368. 14:46an OF model. I wanted to make content
369. 14:50with it because there's a specific
370. 14:52audience that likes to watch yoga in
371. 14:54latex suits and Spider-Man suits and
372. 14:56stuff.
373. 14:58We are definitely the wrong people for
374. 14:59that. And I have to say, I'm also a bit
375. 15:01sensitive, okay? I don't know, because
376. 15:03we're really having problems with
377. 15:04perverts right now who are kind of
378. 15:06harassing us, and I don't find it funny
379. 15:07at all, you know? Yes, I'm just being
380. 15:10open with you, so I...
381. 15:12Yeah, no, but honestly, I don't think
382. 15:15this is cool at all right now, because
383. 15:19we're really sensitized to that. Oh.
384. 15:22Okay. Okay, I'm sorry. I didn't want to
385. 15:24bother you with that or anything. I
386. 15:26didn't know that. I'm just looking for
387. 15:29a yoga instructor who is willing to
388. 15:32cooperate with my content. But why
389. 15:35don't you just come out with it instead
390. 15:37of beating around the bush for ages,
391. 15:38you know? I'm being perfectly nice here
392. 15:40.
393. 15:41Yeah, so they don't hang up right away,
394. 15:44but in the end I knew,
395. 15:47I mean, I knew from the start which way
396. 15:49it was going, but I didn't want to be a
397. 15:51jerk or intolerant, you know? But I
398. 15:54think it's, yeah, I don't think that's
399. 15:56quite right.
400. 15:58Yeah, but are you a doctor?
401. 16:02What? What are you talking about?
402. 16:05Yeah, are you a doctor?
403. 16:07No, I'm not. And I’d be hanging up
404. 16:09now too.
405. 16:10No, because I need to get some good
406. 16:11therapy. I'm sorry. Yeah, but I’ll
407. 16:13just look somewhere else for a
408. 16:16for a naturist department or something.
409. 16:18Maybe that’ll go better.
410. 16:20Strong. I think you can really catch up
411. 16:23with that.
412. 16:23Yeah. Yeah. 9 10 11 12 13 14 Okay, if
413. 16:27you mess up here, and I hope that
414. 16:30happens,
415. 16:32I have a good chance that the picture
416. 16:34won't be leaked.
417. 16:38Hello,
418. 16:38a wonderful good evening. Schneider is
419. 16:40the name. Um, I’m currently looking
420. 16:43for a new yoga studio and I wanted to
421. 16:45ask if I could steal 5 minutes of your
422. 16:47time for a few questions.
423. 16:49Um, now is bad because I’m at the
424. 16:51checkout. If you call back in 10
425. 16:55minutes, that might work.
426. 16:57Yeah, in 10 minutes I unfortunately
427. 16:58have to take the dog out. That’ll be
428. 17:00very, very difficult. Could you perhaps
429. 17:01transfer me to another employee?
430. 17:03No, I’m alone. That’s not possible.
431. 17:06Could I perhaps have 2 minutes, at most
432. 17:092 minutes, okay? Go ahead.
433. 17:12Okay, so I recently had the problem at
434. 17:15my old yoga studio that there were
435. 17:17often fights happening and also really
436. 17:20strange people wearing all sorts of
437. 17:22suits.
438. 17:23I think you’re a scam caller. We can
439. 17:27go ahead and hang up.
440. 17:29No, I just can't imagine that in a yoga
441. 17:32studio.
442. 17:33That's exactly why I want to switch.
443. 17:35That is also the reason for it. I mean,
444. 17:37I've been there for years, why fights?
445. 17:39What were the reasons?
446. 17:40I don't know. I mean, I was just doing
447. 17:43my exercises normally and in the
448. 17:46background you could just hear or see
449. 17:49some men, or mostly men, fighting with
450. 17:52each other, and that's basically, well,
451. 17:55in a yoga studio.
452. 17:56In a yoga studio. Yeah, that’s
453. 17:58exactly what's paradoxical about it.
454. 18:02So
455. 18:03sounds weird, but yeah, okay.
456. 18:06Yeah. Asking where that was? Also in
457. 18:09Berlin.
458. 18:09Okay.
459. 18:10Exactly.
460. 18:10Okay. And your questions?
461. 18:11Exactly. Well, as I said, I want to
462. 18:13change because of a fight, or rather, I
463. 18:15want to switch because it’s just
464. 18:16happening more and more often with some
465. 18:18really strange people, to be honest.
466. 18:20And that’s why I wanted to ask if
467. 18:22there is generally a possibility for me
468. 18:25to do the exercises together with my
469. 18:27partner.
470. 18:28Well, we have partner yoga classes.
471. 18:30Mhm. But very, very rarely. They are
472. 18:33more like workshop formats. Um, you can
473. 18:38of course attend a yoga class together
474. 18:40with your partner, but doing something
475. 18:42like AcroYoga together, we don’t
476. 18:44offer that right now. Unless it’s in
477. 18:48a workshop context.
478. 18:49Mhm. I understand, right? We often like
479. 18:52to do the shoulder stand and, yeah,
480. 18:54that only works together, of course.
481. 18:56That’s why, um, is there some kind of
482. 18:57dress code at your place, or can you
483. 18:59just come however you want? I mean, not
484. 19:01in an exaggerated sense like a latex
485. 19:03suit, that’s not for a yoga class,
486. 19:05but can you just show up however you
487. 19:06like? Because I spoke to someone before
488. 19:10and they were very, very strict,
489. 19:12meaning you were only allowed to come
490. 19:14with special—well, wrong word—
491. 19:16special uniform, so I wanted to ask if
492. 19:18it’s relatively relaxed there, right?
493. 19:21We don’t have a yoga dress code,
494. 19:24but being shirtless is a taboo for men
495. 19:26with us, for example. Oh, okay. Very
496. 19:29good, because I am generally very
497. 19:31overweight, so 150 kg on the scale, and
498. 19:33honestly, I don’t think anyone wants
499. 19:35to see that. So you just have to be
500. 19:37honest with yourself about that.
501. 19:38Yeah, well, it depends, but yes. No,
502. 19:41there is no, no dress code with us.
503. 19:44Okay. Okay, very good. Very good. Um,
504. 19:46do you offer any other basic types of
505. 19:49therapy? For example, the last one I
506. 19:51had very positive experience with was "
507. 19:53Gun" therapy. But are there generally
508. 19:56others?
509. 19:56What kind of therapy? "Gun" therapy.
510. 20:00What do you mean by that?
511. 20:02It’s basically when the body, how can
512. 20:04I explain this most simply? Please
513. 20:07don’t get me wrong now. Are you
514. 20:08familiar with the doggy position? Yes,
515. 20:13but I don't know what that has to do
516. 20:15with yoga, to be honest.
517. 20:18Yes, it’s a partner exercise again,
518. 20:20and let’s say, to put it simply and
519. 20:22crudely, you basically get into this
520. 20:24doggy position and then, for example,
521. 20:26you stretch each other. Mhm.
522. 20:30Exactly.
523. 20:31Yes. As I said, Agro Yoga, if you want
524. 20:34to do yoga with your partner, there are
525. 20:37various yoga studios that
526. 20:39Please hang up. explicitly offer Agro
527. 20:42Yoga, so partner yoga, you know? So
528. 20:44maybe that is
529. 20:46the better choice for you.
530. 20:48How many partners can it be for? Like,
531. 20:50could I bring my grandma along too? So,
532. 20:52for example, as a group of three?
533. 20:55I have no idea. We don't offer that, so
534. 20:58I can't give you an answer.
535. 21:00Oh, I see. Ah, okay. Yeah, alright.
536. 21:02Sorry, I must have misunderstood then.
537. 21:03Yeah, alright. Then, then I understand,
538. 21:05then I understand. I mean, at the end
539. 21:07of the day, we had 69 items and
540. 21:10you've already gone over your two
541. 21:12minutes.
542. 21:13Please hang up, hang up
543. 21:15you're keeping me from my work.
544. 21:16Oh, sorry, sorry.
545. 21:18That's why I'm hanging up now. Okay.
546. 21:20Yeah, but
547. 21:21if you still have questions, you'll
548. 21:23find everything, all the information on
549. 21:25our website. But I'm also an OF model,
550. 21:28so I can bring you some reach.
551. 21:30No, no, no, no.
552. 21:32Not even in the nudist department, they
553. 21:34have
554. 21:35Bye.
555. 21:35Bye.
556. 21:37No. Oh,
557. 21:38bro, she was she was she was nice. She
558. 21:40was likable. She was nice.
559. 21:41I mean, I wouldn't have expected you to
560. 21:44get so much from the bingo after how
561. 21:46the call started. For real, me too. I
562. 21:48thought she'd hang up immediately. I
563. 21:50thought I was toast. Man, damn.
564. 21:53Whoa, you did great, man. 12 points.
565. 21:57Round five.
566. 22:00Hello.
567. 22:01Yes. Hello.
568. 22:02Hello.
569. 22:04Yes. It's about a train ticket of mine.
570. 22:07It's an absolute disaster with Deutsche
571. 22:10Bahn again, as always. There was a
572. 22:13signal failure here. I booked a train
573. 22:17ticket in Dortmund to Berlin today and
574. 22:19there was another strike at Deutsche
575. 22:22Bahn. You know how it is. I bought an
576. 22:25ICE ticket and this ICE was supposed to
577. 22:28arrive, but the track was occupied and
578. 22:30I've really seen everything with
579. 22:32Deutsche Bahn. From police
580. 22:35interventions to children on the tracks
581. 22:39to bomb disposals. But today's
582. 22:42scheduled delay is truly an absolute
583. 22:45hell.
584. 22:46There's no rail traffic. Yes, exactly.
585. 22:49There was a short-notice staff shortage
586. 22:52and the diversion was completely
587. 22:53blocked and I don't know, there was
588. 22:55some kind of accident with personal
589. 22:57injury, which happens often at Deutsche
590. 22:59Bahn, and there was an emergency doctor
591. 23:01on the track.
592. 23:03Okay. And which station does that
593. 23:05affect? I'm checking which one.
594. 23:07Why is Deutsche Bahn always late?
595. 23:10It’s been this long already. Isn't
596. 23:12there a faster way? Because I don't
597. 23:13know when the next train is actually
598. 23:15coming.
599. 23:15The next train is coming, I'll say in a
600. 23:18second. Oh.
601. 23:19Man, Deutsche Bahn, why must you always
602. 23:21be late?
603. 23:22Yes, that unfortunately cannot be
604. 23:24foreseen. I am truly very sorry.
605. 23:26Yes, but you're known for always being
606. 23:28so late. Why?
607. 23:308 minutes, that's the RE8.
608. 23:34RE8, but the board says there's a
609. 23:37repair on an overhead line and a switch
610. 23:39. All the trains going to Berlin seem
611. 23:43to be canceled here.
612. 23:44And on the board it says something like
613. 23:46...
614. 23:46Delay from previous trip.
615. 23:48That’s not what it says for me. For
616. 23:50me it says delay in transit, but that's
617. 23:52what it says.
618. 23:53No, I don't believe a word you say.
619. 23:55You’re a Deutsche Bahn employee. I
620. 23:56don’t believe anything you say
621. 23:57anymore. You are always late. You
622. 24:00always have to wait. I can’t take it
623. 24:02anymore. I’ve had enough.
624. 24:03I believe that, but unfortunately
625. 24:06there’s not much else I can do. You
626. 24:09are the most famous German meme just
627. 24:11because of the delays.
628. 24:14Yes, that's true, that's true. But we
629. 24:18cannot foresee situations. Like,
630. 24:21there's an emergency medical call, and
631. 24:24we can't foresee that someone will get
632. 24:27sick.
633. 24:28Okay. Yes. Just put yourselves in this
634. 24:31position. Use. Who is the G? Who is the
635. 24:40phone from Bingo Go Chat?
636. 24:45Hello, can you hear me?
637. 24:46Hello, can you hear me? Good. Hello Mr.
638. 24:48Natz, my name, good day. The thing is,
639. 24:50I'm currently at Hamm main station and
640. 24:52I wanted to go to Berlin and everything
641. 24:54is catastrophic here right now. I mean,
642. 24:56it's one strike after another here. I
643. 24:59also heard, just from reception or
644. 25:00information, about a police operation,
645. 25:03a child on the tracks. So it’s really
646. 25:05strange what’s going on right now.
647. 25:07Partly because the track is blocked,
648. 25:08and honestly, I don't know what to do
649. 25:10here now. I was also told to take the
650. 25:13detour and leave, but in the end, I'm
651. 25:15stuck here and, well, I don't know what
652. 25:17to do.
653. 25:19So from Hamm to Berlin. Yes.
654. 25:21Exactly.
655. 25:22Well, I can see, at 18:32 an IC643 is
656. 25:28starting with a delay.
657. 25:31At my work, I have last-minute staff
658. 25:32shortages tomorrow and I have to do
659. 25:34something for my employees immediately.
660. 25:36But the problem is, I can't do anything
661. 25:38right now, right? It’s like a bomb
662. 25:40disposal operation here. I’m slowly
663. 25:42losing my temper. Really, I am furious.
664. 25:45Unbelievable. Yes.
665. 25:48Look, I'm sorry, but the people at the
666. 25:51information desk, they're like a
667. 25:52serious accident with injuries, you
668. 25:54know? They're really not competent at
669. 25:57all, you know? Every time they say one
670. 25:59thing and then the other person says
671. 26:01something else and you never get
672. 26:02anywhere. Like here, there was a
673. 26:04situation where a train was overtaken
674. 26:06by an ICE and because of that my ticket
675. 26:08was no longer valid. They said it was
676. 26:10still valid, then I had to pay a € 60
677. 26:12fine.
678. 26:13What kind of ticket do you have?
679. 26:15Yeah, a normal online ticket for that
680. 26:16piece of broken train.
681. 26:21No matter which train you get on, your
682. 26:22ticket is valid.
683. 26:24Okay, wait a minute. The sign just
684. 26:26changed. It says delay from previous
685. 26:29trip now. So now it says, what does it
686. 26:32say? 6:57 PM, it's been pushed back
687. 26:35again. No, wait, now it says repairs on
688. 26:38a switch. So can you guys finally make
689. 26:39up your minds? It’s changing all the
690. 26:41time. This can't be happening.
691. 26:43No information.
692. 26:45Oh, good grief. Hey, my God. Is it
693. 26:47maybe due to the crew being delayed?
694. 26:49I can't see, but like I said, IC643 is
695. 26:54supposed
696. 26:55to start at 322
697. 26:57at 6:32 PM, track 9.
698. 27:00Yeah, I see that here. It says it here
699. 27:02too, there are two trains listed, but
700. 27:05there's a system error. It says, like I
701. 27:08said, please listen, it says
702. 27:10irregularities in construction. So, how
703. 27:13can that be? Why are there two
704. 27:15different errors listed for this? Is
705. 27:16this whole bingo game going to work at
706. 27:20all?
707. 27:21Okay, but like I said, just now someone
708. 27:23else said, yeah, repairs have to be
709. 27:24done on the overhead line. Again, I
710. 27:27find this just Go to track 9 and wait.
711. 27:32I think I just want to write a
712. 27:33complaint email. This can't be
713. 27:34happening. I have to get to work
714. 27:36tomorrow. The, the problem is, if I
715. 27:38don't go there, the hospital, I mean,
716. 27:40people are dying, do you understand
717. 27:41that? They are dying. They're waiting
718. 27:44for the connecting passenger in a
719. 27:45metaphorical sense, in case you
720. 27:46understand that. You know, I have
721. 27:48responsibilities, but when the delayed
722. 27:50provision of the train is just never
723. 27:52guaranteed, it's just annoying. Do you
724. 27:54understand that?
725. 27:55Yes, but I don't understand that.
726. 27:56No, you don't understand. Damn it all.
727. 28:02Oh, he hung up.
728. 28:04Oh my God, he even hung up at the end,
729. 28:06dude. What perfect timing. Nah, dude.
730. 28:10Okay, bro, you’re shitty, dude. I
731. 28:12underestimated you.
732. 28:13You're a serious opponent, bro.
733. 28:16Yo, bro, they are seriously bad,
734. 28:17because they just let me—I could keep
735. 28:19going for another 20 minutes.
736. 28:21They were literally trained to talk
737. 28:23just like ChatGPT.
738. 28:24Do you think they get a commission per
739. 28:26call? If they get insulted, they get
740. 28:28like 5 euros in damages. That wouldn't
741. 28:30surprise me with Deutsche Bahn.
742. 28:32Actually, nah bro, then you'd be a
743. 28:33millionaire already. That
744. 28:35although, wait a minute, I just
745. 28:36realized
746. 28:38you’re the one who lets himself get
747. 28:40insulted for money. So, well, okay.
748. 28:50Hello.
749. 28:51Hello. Tim Schlosser is my name. I'm
750. 28:53calling about a problem with my C-Class
751. 28:56. The technology is acting up again. I
752. 28:59mean, this is the fifth time this year
753. 29:02and I don't know what’s causing it.
754. 29:04What kind of vehicle do you have?
755. 29:05C-Class station wagon.
756. 29:07You’ve got the wrong department. You
757. 29:08reached me at the commercial vehicle
758. 29:10center.
759. 29:10If you had a car, you could call me.
760. 29:13For a C-Class, you need to call the
761. 29:14passenger car branch.
762. 29:16Oh, so you do trucks?
763. 29:17Yes.
764. 29:18Okay. Could you transfer me?
765. 29:20No, because that's a different subject.
766. 29:22We are Daimler, they are Mercedes.
767. 29:24Yeah, but isn't that the same thing? No
768. 29:25, those are two separate companies.
769. 29:27Yeah, everything was better back in the
770. 29:29day. That's why I also think BMW is
771. 29:31better. Aren't you guys actually
772. 29:33ashamed that you build everything out
773. 29:35of plastic?
774. 29:37The old Mercedes were way better.
775. 29:39Yeah, but we don't even build Mercedes
776. 29:41here.
777. 29:46Yeah, but I googled "Mercedes C-Class
778. 29:48support" and your number came up.
779. 29:51You reached my truck service. We have
780. 29:54an Actros here. If you had an Actros,
781. 29:56you could come to us, or an Arocs, or
782. 29:58an Atego. But we aren't responsible for
783. 30:00the C-Class.
784. 30:01If I can't even get transferred here,
785. 30:03then I'm switching back to BMW. BMW
786. 30:06stands for "Blows Mercedes Way" anyway.
787. 30:10Okay,
788. 30:12even Hot Wheels is better.
789. 30:15Okay,
790. 30:17foreigner quality
791. 30:20just—just spamming towards the end,
792. 30:22bro. Dude, I got transferred to the
793. 30:26wrong number, bro. I didn't know how to
794. 30:29proceed. Dude, I still managed to get
795. 30:31the best out of it. What do you want,
796. 30:34bro? That wasn't spam, chat, bro. It
797. 30:37was risky that I could even drop all
798. 30:39that and that he still had so much
799. 30:40patience and didn't hang up. I just
800. 30:43started dropping garbage and hoped he
801. 30:46wouldn't hang up. That was real
802. 30:48gambling.
803. 30:50Everyone is writing "spammer" right now
804. 30:52; the spam at the end was too much,
805. 30:54dude. They say that every time, bro.
806. 30:56That
807. 30:57nah, not yesterday. No, no. When I said
808. 30:59that yesterday, right? When I when I
809. 31:01said
810. 31:02yeah, bro, they say that because you
811. 31:03accused me now, bro, so bro, that
812. 31:05wasn't spam chat, bro. Do you guys know
813. 31:07what spamming is? Do you guys know what
814. 31:09spam is? Build tanks, GS, puss, magnet,
815. 31:12the ladomobile, the exhaust, they sell
816. 31:14Formula 1 models, is there a disability
817. 31:16discount? That's spam, that's spam chat
818. 31:19, I even gave him time to reply. So
819. 31:21please bro, don't provoke me chat, come
820. 31:24on chat, man, don't provoke me chat.
821. 31:26please have you still got a
822. 31:27Mercedes hello there. A wonderful good
823. 31:31day, Schlüssel is my name. I was
824. 31:33actually supposed to be in the queue
825. 31:35right now, so I'm even more thrilled
826. 31:36that it went so fast. And it's about
827. 31:39this, I'm interested in a Mercedes.
828. 31:41That's already nice.
829. 31:42I think so too, right? Exactly. So I am
830. 31:46exactly. I am a typical BMW driver and
831. 31:49I have always gone through life with
832. 31:51this mindset that BMW is simply better
833. 31:53and yeah they have nice cars too, I
834. 31:55wouldn't play that down at all.
835. 31:57Yeah, but honestly,
836. 31:58I can understand. I'm from Munich, I
837. 32:00also had that experience for 20 years,
838. 32:02they're going to boil over, chat. Uh
839. 32:05yeah, everyone has to, sometimes after
840. 32:0720 years you come to a different
841. 32:09decision eventually.
842. 32:10Yeah, that's true. I've been driving
843. 32:12BMW for over 10 years and I have to say
844. 32:14, the technology is constantly
845. 32:15glitching. So, so, if I can compare,
846. 32:17even Hot Wheels is better than BMW. I
847. 32:19only have problems with it and that's
848. 32:21why I'm interested in a Mercedes now,
849. 32:22finally.
850. 32:23Mercedes is just, they are very elegant
851. 32:25now. From their whole appearance, it's
852. 32:27all very, very nice and coordinated and
853. 32:29I think BMW takes a very technical path
854. 32:31, which is also very nice and as I said
855. 32:33, it has to please every customer, but
856. 32:34as I said, what kind of vehicle would
857. 32:36be interesting for you?
858. 32:38Well, I'm definitely interested in an
859. 32:40E-Class.
860. 32:41Okay, that would be the 5 series
861. 32:43equivalent in principle.
862. 32:44Exactly. So mainly not a dealer mobile,
863. 32:47but a decent car, right? I want to
864. 32:49spend a bit of money on it. So I wanted
865. 32:52to ask, how long can you finance with
866. 32:53you guys? I mean, can you finance for
867. 32:5510 years or is that too much?
868. 32:57More likely to say. Well, usually I
869. 33:00think the maximum is 64 months. What
870. 33:04are you looking for, T-model? So BMW
871. 33:06Touring or more of a sedan?
872. 33:09Yes, definitely a sedan. So, I I want
873. 33:11to take advantage of YouTuber leasing
874. 33:14here, and well, I'm a successful
875. 33:16YouTuber, so I really want a flashy car
876. 33:18to flex in front of the kids. Exactly.
877. 33:23Okay. So, more of an AMG engine or just
878. 33:26something high-powered? Doesn't have to
879. 33:29be an AMG.
880. 33:30Oh, like, a chick magnet. An AMG, I
881. 33:32think. That would be good.
882. 33:36Well, there's an E53, it starts at €
883. 33:39131,000.
884. 33:40Mhm. Mhm.
885. 33:41That puts you at a monthly financing
886. 33:44rate with full financing of € 1,690.
887. 33:48That's peanuts. No problem at all. No
888. 33:51problem at all,
889. 33:53right? That's what I was going to say.
890. 33:54Like I said, that would be, wait, no,
891. 33:56there's even a down payment included.
892. 33:57€ 26,000 included.
893. 33:58Okay, but for that kind of money, I
894. 34:00expect a warranty. Like, if my dog just
895. 34:02craps all over the leather seats, is
896. 34:04that covered?
897. 34:06It happens. He sometimes has a bit of
898. 34:07diarrhea and stuff. If your dog, if
899. 34:09your dog makes a mess in your vehicle.
900. 34:11Yeah,
901. 34:12that would ultimately be your challenge
902. 34:15in that regard.
903. 34:17Excuse me? You're not serious, right?
904. 34:22It's just that if a dog relieves itself
905. 34:23in your vehicle, or if you cause damage
906. 34:25to the vehicle, then no one can provide
907. 34:26a warranty for that. You are welcome to
908. 34:30have a warranty for things that are
909. 34:32covered, as a warranty always covers
910. 34:35things that shouldn't happen during
911. 34:37normal road traffic use; but if you
912. 34:39cause impurities, whether intentionally
913. 34:42or unintentionally, we can't cover that
914. 34:44with a warranty. Mm. Yeah, the way you
915. 34:48put it, I'm thinking I'd rather stay
916. 34:50with BMW, because let's be honest, BMW
917. 34:52stands for "Blow Mercedes Way," if
918. 34:53we're being real. And
919. 34:56honestly, the old Mercedes were better,
920. 34:58100 percent, but nowadays, I don't know
921. 35:00, aren't you guys ashamed to build
922. 35:02everything out of plastic?
923. 35:05Okay, I notice this phone call is
924. 35:07heading in a very exciting direction.
925. 35:09I'm not entirely sure if you're being
926. 35:10serious with me right now. Um, so I'm
927. 35:13going to end the call here, but I still
928. 35:15wish you all the best, okay?
929. 35:17I wish you a nice weekend, too. Thanks
930. 35:19for all the points. Thank you so, so
931. 35:20much. Great. Bye. That was
932. 35:26a win, dude. I could have finished the
933. 35:28whole bingo card, but I thought, put
934. 35:31you out of your misery.
935. 35:32Yeah, exactly, exactly, exactly.
936. 35:34Chat, Chat, you know what time it is.
937. 35:36You know what time it is. I’m
938. 35:37prepping you guys. Bro, wait a sec,
939. 35:40stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop,
940. 35:41stop, before you post the picture. Okay
941. 35:45. Do you see the color on my face? Do
942. 35:48you see this color on my face?
943. 35:50Please, okay, bro, listen to me. Please
944. 35:54do it, please do it for my sake. Short
945. 35:58and painless. Quickly show the screen
946. 36:01and do this, bro. Do you see my OBS? Do
947. 36:04you see my OBS? How I’m moving it?
948. 36:06Okay, do this. Did you see it?
949. 36:09Okay, bro. Time.
950. 36:11So, bro, please don't keep it on stream
951. 36:13for long, please be really quick, bro.
952. 36:16As fast as possible. Just like that,
953. 36:17bro, just show it for a millisecond if
954. 36:19you can. I’m, dude, bro, I’m going
955. 36:21to, dude, this is going to be so
956. 36:23embarrassing.
957. 36:24You tell the stream.
958. 36:25Yeah, that's fine, bro. No, no, no, no,
959. 36:28no. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop,
960. 36:32stop, bro, stop. Not in a tab, do you
961. 36:35have a second screen? Yes, okay.
962. 36:39I zoomed out. No, I zoomed out.
963. 36:45And you only do it for a millisecond.
964. 36:47I’m only doing a millisecond.
965. 36:48Okay, I believe you. I trust you, bro.
966. 36:52Dude, that was not a millisecond, you
967. 36:54bro. That was not a millisecond. To
968. 36:59make a long story short, a few years
969. 37:00ago I was in media design training and
970. 37:02my boss wanted employee photos for the
971. 37:04website. And for whatever reason, he
972. 37:07wanted a few male employees to get
973. 37:09makeup done. Because I was afraid of
974. 37:12losing my apprenticeship, I let my boss
975. 37:14push me around and took the photo.
976. 37:16Shoutout to you again, Rob. Was the
977. 37:18chillest boss, though.