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"Somebody Be Charitable" - My Mother-in-Law Made My Pie the Joke of the Thanksgiving Auction — Transcript

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0:00My mother-in-law held up my pie at the
0:01church Thanksgiving auction and asked
0:03the whole fellowship hall, "Do I hear
0:05$5?" She did it every year. This year,
0:08I'd baked from a card signed with
0:10initials found in a 1974 cookbook. There
0:14were about 150 people in that hall.
0:16Folding tables with paper turkeys on
0:18them, coffee and the big silver
0:21ids under the tables, stealing rolls.
0:24The auction is the last thing before the
0:26meal. Everybody stays for it because
0:28it's the best show in Paduca on the
0:30Sunday before Thanksgiving. My
0:32mother-in-law, Melba, runs it. She's run
0:34it for 20 years. She has a microphone
0:37and a little wooden gavvel her late
0:38husband made her. And she's good at it.
0:40She's funny. She knows everybody's
0:42business and how far she can push it. 10
0:45minutes before, she had sold my
0:47sister-in-law's pie for $300. Melba had
0:50bid on it herself against two of her
0:52friends, driving it up and up while the
0:54room cheered. Brandy stood by the table
0:56and did a little curtsy. That happens
0:58every year, too. Then Melba picked up my
1:01pie. She held it up high in one hand
1:03like a waiter with a tray and turned it
1:05so everybody could see. Next, we have a
1:08pie from Josephine, she said. Do I hear
1:10$5? Somebody be charitable. And the room
1:13laughed. Not mean exactly. The way
1:17people laugh at a joke they've heard
1:18before. They'd heard it every year for
1:2011 years. I stood by the dessert table
1:23with my hands folded and my face hot. My
1:25daughter, Twi, who was nine, pulled on
1:28my sleeve. "Mama," she whispered. "Why
1:32is that funny?" I didn't answer her. I
1:35was looking past Melba at the back of
1:37the hall at an old man at the last table
1:40by the door who had put down his coffee
1:42cup. He hadn't bid on a pie in 20 years.
1:45He was raising his hand. If anyone in
1:47your family has ever made you the
1:48punchline of a tradition, stay with me
1:51because what that old man was about to
1:53say had been waiting 50 years for
1:55somebody to bake the right pie. My name
1:57is Josephine Brumfield. I was 39 that
1:59November. I'm a rural mail carrier for
2:01the postal service out of Paduka,
2:03Kentucky. I drive 108 m a day on back
2:06roads and a right-hand drive Jeep. I
2:08know every mailbox in the western half
2:10of McCracken County. My husband Garland
2:13and I had been married 14 years. We have
2:16two kids. Koi was 12. Twi was 9. Melba
2:19is Garland's mother. She was 65 that
2:22year. I want to be fair to her before I
2:24tell you anything else. Melba isn't a
2:26bad woman. She's loud and she's proud
2:29and she loves her children like a bear
2:31loves its cubs. When Garland heard his
2:33back at the railard in 2019 and was out
2:36of work for 4 months, Melba paid our
2:38mortgage. She never mentioned it again.
2:40Not once. That's real. I don't forget
2:43it. That's why I put up with the pie. It
2:45started my fourth Thanksgiving in the
2:47family. I brought a pie to the auction
2:49because I didn't know any better. It was
2:51a pumpkin pie from a can with a store
2:53crust and it was fine. Melba held it up
2:56and said, "Do I hear $5? Somebody be
2:59charitable." People laughed. Garland's
3:01uncle bid $5. Melba banged the gavl.
3:05Sold to the man with a good heart. I
3:07thought it was a one-time joke. I
3:09laughed along. The next year, I tried
3:11harder. apple from scratch. Melba said
3:14the same thing. $5. Somebody be
3:16charitable. The year after that, I made
3:19a chess pie that took me two days. She
3:21held it up and said, " $5, folks." And
3:24that's me being generous. Somebody's
3:26teenager bid it as a dare. By the fifth
3:28year, it was a tradition. People waited
3:31for it. When my pie came up, the room
3:33started grinning before Melba even
3:35opened her mouth. A woman I barely knew
3:37told me once at the Kroger, "I just love
3:40the $5 pie. It's the best part.
3:43Meanwhile, every single year, Melba's
3:46daughter, Brandy, brought what Melba
3:48called Grandma Lerene's famous
3:50buttermilk pie. And every single year,
3:52Melba bid on it herself at the
3:54microphone, laughing until it went for
3:56$200, $250, $300.
4:00The money goes to the Thanksgiving
4:02baskets, so nobody ever minded. Melba
4:04always paid. She'd hand the money to the
4:06treasurer with a flourish, and I'd go
4:08home with a $5 pie and smile in the car.
4:11Garland hated it. He told his mother so
4:14more than once. Melba always said the
4:16same thing. Oh, Garland, it's a joke.
4:19Josephine knows it's a joke. Don't you,
4:21honey? And I always said I did because
4:24of the four months of mortgage, because
4:26she's Garland's mother, and because I'm
4:28not the kind of person who makes a scene
4:29in a fellowship hall. But my kids were
4:32getting older. Koi had stopped coming to
4:34the auction 2 years before. He said it
4:36was boring. I knew it wasn't that. And
4:38Twilight that year was old enough to ask
4:41why it was funny. Here's where the
4:43cookbook comes in. Friendship Baptist
4:45was turning 120 years old that fall. To
4:48celebrate, the women's committee decided
4:50to reprint the old church cookbook. It's
4:52called Friendship Kitchen. It was first
4:54printed in 1974. Everybody's grandmother
4:57had a copy with the spine taped and the
4:59pages stuck together with 50 years of
5:02sorghum. Melba chaired the committee.
5:04She decided we'd do a 50th anniversary
5:06edition. All the old recipes plus new
5:09ones printed in Paduca. 300 copies, $15
5:13each. The money would go to the
5:14Thanksgiving baskets. We'd sell them at
5:16the auction. And Melba decided I would
5:18type it. You're good with details,
5:20honey, she said. All that mail. So, from
5:23August to October, every night after
5:25supper, I sat at my kitchen table with
5:27the old 1974 book propped open and
5:30typed. 240 recipes, congealed salads,
5:35something called Pineapple Delight that
5:37I'm still afraid of. Everyone with the
5:39name of the woman who sent it in, Mrs.
5:41This, Mrs. That. A lot of them were
5:44names I knew from mailboxes. Some were
5:46names I only knew from the cemetery. On
5:48page 112 was the buttermilk pie.
5:52Buttermilk pie. Mrs. Lerene Brumfield.
5:55Lerene was Garland's grandmother,
5:57Melba's mother-in-law. She died before I
5:59married in. That was the pie Brandy
6:01brought every year, the famous one. I
6:03typed it in. Then a week later, Melba
6:06came by to check my work. She sat at my
6:08table with her reading glasses on and a
6:10red pen, and she went through the pages
6:12one by one. When she got to page 112,
6:16she tapped it. Change this, she said.
6:19Don't put Lerene. put Brumfield family
6:21buttermilk pie from Melba Brumfield, but
6:24Lerene sent it in. Lerene's been gone 18
6:27years. It's a family recipe. I'm the
6:30family now. She made the change herself
6:32in red. That pie has won the auction 20
6:35years running. People should know where
6:37it comes from. I didn't argue. It was
6:39her family's recipe. I thought it was.
6:42Then she looked up at me over her
6:43glasses. And honey, she said, don't you
6:47bother making a pie for the auction this
6:49year. Not with the anniversary and the
6:51cookbook launch and all. We'll have a
6:53big crowd. You'll just embarrass
6:54yourself. She patted my hand. Unless you
6:57want to bring one for the $5 laugh.
6:59People do love that. She went home. I
7:02sat at the kitchen table for a long
7:04time. I want to be honest about what I
7:06felt. It wasn't anger. Not yet. It was
7:09tiredness. 11 years of being the $5
7:12laugh. and something else, too. Smaller
7:15and harder. I decided I was going to
7:18bake a pie that year. A real one. The
7:20best one I'd ever made. Not to beat
7:23anybody, just so I could stand by that
7:25table and know. But I didn't have a
7:27recipe I trusted. Everything I made,
7:29Melba had already laughed at. So, I went
7:31to the church library. Friendship
7:33Baptist has a little library in a room
7:35off the fellowship hall. Mostly its
7:37devotionals and old Sunday school
7:39quarterlys. But on the bottom shelf,
7:41there were three copies of the 1974
7:44Friendship Kitchen. I was looking for
7:45one in better condition than mine to
7:47check a page I couldn't read. The second
7:49copy had something on the back. The back
7:51cover had a little paper pocket glued
7:53inside, like old library books. Inside
7:56the pocket was an index card, yellowed,
7:59soft as cloth at the corners,
8:01handwritten in blue ink in the most
8:04beautiful cursive I have ever seen. It
8:06was a buttermilk pie. Same filling as
8:08page 112. Eggs, sugar, buttermilk, a
8:13little flour, vanilla, nutmeg, word for
8:16word. But the printed recipe in the book
8:18just says, "For the crust, use your
8:20favorite pastry." The card was
8:22different. Half the card was about the
8:24crust. Grate the butter frozen. One
8:27spoon of lard. No more, no less. One
8:30spoon of vinegar in the ice water. Don't
8:32you dare stretch it. It'll shrink on you
8:34out of spite. crimp with your thumb,
8:37then press with a fork on every third
8:38one, so you know it's mine. And at the
8:41bottom, two initials, PH. I sat on the
8:44floor of that little library and read it
8:46three times. I didn't know who PH was.
8:49There's no PH in the whole 1974 book. I
8:52checked. I went through every page
8:54twice. And yet, somebody had tucked her
8:56own card into the back of the church's
8:58copy. It had the same filling as
9:00Lerene's famous pie and a crust Lerene's
9:02page left out. I took a picture of the
9:05card with my phone. I put the card back
9:07in the pocket exactly where it had been.
9:09Then I went home and started practicing.
9:11Now, I'll tell you something I didn't
9:13know that day, but you might guess. On
9:15my mail route, out past Lone Oak,
9:17there's a farm at the end of a long
9:19gravel lane. 200 acres of soybeans and
9:22an old white house with a deep porch.
9:25The mailbox at the road is shaped like a
9:27barn, and it's been painted so many
9:29times you can barely read the letters.
9:32But if you look close, they say O and P
9:35high Tower. For 9 years, I delivered to
9:38that box. For the last three, I'd driven
9:41up the lane and carried the mail to the
9:42porch. The man who lived there had a bad
9:45hip and couldn't walk to the road. His
9:47name was Oadia High Tower. He was 91. He
9:51got seed cataloges, his pension check,
9:53and a magazine about bird dogs, though
9:55he didn't have a dog anymore. Mostly, he
9:57got nothing. I brought it anyway. He'd
10:00sit on the porch in a canvas coat and
10:02tell me the weather before it happened.
10:04He was usually right. He never talked
10:06about his wife. I knew there had been
10:08one because of the pee on the mailbox.
10:10That's all I knew. I never connected the
10:12two. A card signed PH in a church
10:15library. A faded P on a barn-shaped
10:18mailbox. I drive past 400 mailboxes a
10:21day. I didn't put it together. But you
10:23did, didn't you? It took me six tries to
10:26get that crust right. The first one
10:28shrank out of spite, exactly like the
10:30card said, because I stretched it. The
10:32second was tough because I used warm
10:34water. By the third one, Twilight was
10:36helping. She grated the frozen butter on
10:39the big holes of the box grater with her
10:41tongue between her teeth. She measured
10:43the vinegar like it was medicine. She
10:45was the one who figured out what the
10:46card meant about the crimp. Thumb,
10:48thumb, fork, thumb, thumb, fork. So, you
10:53know it's hers, Twilight said. It's like
10:55a signature. The fourth one I took on my
10:57root. It was a Wednesday in late
10:59October. The crust was better, but not
11:01right. Too thick at the edge. I cut it
11:04into slices and wrapped them in wax
11:06paper and handed them out at mailboxes
11:08like a crazy woman. The Amish family on
11:10Hingleville Road got two. The lady with
11:12the goats got one. The last slice I
11:15carried up Obadiah High Towers Lane with
11:17his seed catalog. Pi, I said. I'm
11:20practicing for a church auction. Tell me
11:22the truth. He unwrapped it on the porch
11:24rail. He took a bite. He chewed for a
11:27long time, looking out at the soybean
11:28stubble. Too much nutmeg, he said. Then
11:32he took another bite. He was quiet.
11:34Somebody used to make one like this.
11:36Like this. Like this. But not like this.
11:40He set the wax paper down on the rail
11:42and folded it very neatly. The way you
11:44fold a flag. Crust's wrong. You
11:47stretched it. How do you know? It shrunk
11:50on you. It does that out of spite. He
11:52said it like he was quoting somebody.
11:54Then he looked away and said it was
11:56going to rain Thursday and it did. I
11:58drove off down the lane thinking that's
12:01what the card says out of spite. Then I
12:04thought lots of old ladies probably said
12:06that. I had 60 more mailboxes to get to.
12:09The sixth one came out of the oven on a
12:11Thursday night in early November. The
12:13filling was set and golden with a little
12:15nutmeg freckle on top. The crust was
12:18flaky enough to shatter when you touched
12:19it, and it held its shape all the way
12:21around. Thumb, thumb, fork. Garland ate
12:25a slice standing up at the counter. He
12:27doesn't say much. He ate the whole slice
12:29without a word. Then he cut himself
12:31another. Joe, he said with his mouth
12:34full. That's not my grandma's pie. It's
12:37the same filling. Same as page 112. I
12:40know. I've been eating Grandma's pie my
12:42whole life. He looked at the crust. But
12:44that's not hers. Hers was never like
12:46this. Brandy buys her crusts frozen at
12:49the Kroger. Grandma did too, I think. At
12:52the end, he chewed. This is better. This
12:55is somebody else's. I didn't know what
12:57to say to that. So, I put the pie in the
13:00refrigerator and I didn't tell anyone.
13:02On the second Tuesday of November, the
13:04cookbooks came back from the printer.
13:06Melda had the women's committee over to
13:08her house to see them. me, Brandy, and
13:11four others, plus Verie Halcom, who was
13:1479 and had been the church secretary
13:16since 1971.
13:18Verie mostly came for the coffee cake.
13:20The books were beautiful. I'll give
13:22Melba that. Green cover, gold letters,
13:25friendship kitchen, 50th anniversary
13:28edition, 300 copies in boxes stacked in
13:31Melba's living room. Melba opened one to
13:33page 112 and held it up for everybody.
13:36Brumfield family buttermilk pie from
13:38Melba Brumfield. Isn't that something?
13:41She said 50 years of the Brumfield
13:43buttermilk and the auction Sunday. Bry's
13:46bringing it, of course. I'm going to bid
13:48it up to 300 again. People love it. It's
13:51tradition. She laughed. Josephine, you
13:54bring one of yours. We need the $5
13:56laugh. Brandy laughed. Two of the other
13:59women laughed. Very Halcom didn't laugh.
14:02She'd picked up a copy of the new book.
14:04She was looking at page 112. She looked
14:07at it for a long time with her lips
14:09pressed together. Then she closed the
14:11book and set it down and ate her coffee
14:13cake. I noticed. I didn't know why. On
14:16the drive home, I almost turned around.
14:19I almost went back and said, "Melba, I
14:22found a card. Somebody else wrote this
14:24recipe down first with a better crust."
14:27But what would I say? Two initials on an
14:29index card. Melba would tell me I'd
14:31found somebody's copy. and she'd
14:33probably be right. Ladies copied each
14:35other's recipes all the time in 1974. It
14:38didn't prove anything. And honestly, I
14:40didn't care whose name was in the book.
14:42I just wanted to bake a good pie. That's
14:44what I told myself. On Saturday morning,
14:47the women set up the fellowship hall.
14:49Folding tables, paper tablecloths, the
14:52paper turkeys the kids had colored in
14:54Sunday school. Melba had made the little
14:56cards that go in front of each pie on
14:57the auction table. She'd done them on
14:59her computer in a fancy font with a
15:02border of autumn leaves. Bry said
15:04Grandma Lerene's famous Brumfield
15:06buttermilk pie. Mine said Josephine's
15:09pie. Under it smaller in parenthesis,
15:13bring your spare change. Melba saw me
15:16looking at it. She laughed. Oh honey,
15:18it's a joke. People expect it now. It's
15:21like the turkey on the poster. You don't
15:23want to disappoint them. Very Halcom was
15:25setting out the coffee cups. She looked
15:27at the card. She looked at Melba. She
15:29went back to the coffee cups and set
15:31them down a little harder than she
15:33needed to. I put my card in my apron
15:35pocket. I didn't put it out. Melba
15:37didn't notice. On Friday, I had driven
15:40up Oadia High Tower's lane with his
15:41mail, a seed catalog, and a heating
15:44bill. He was on the porch wrapped up in
15:46his canvas coat, even though it was 50°.
15:49Going to turn cold Sunday night, he
15:50said. Hard frost. Mr. High Tower. I
15:53said, "You ever come to the Thanksgiving
15:55supper at Friendship Sunday after
15:57church?" He looked at me sideways. "I
16:00used to. Not in a long time." "There's a
16:02pie auction. I'm bringing one. I'd like
16:05your opinion. You'd be doing me a
16:06favor." He was quiet for a while. He
16:09looked out at his soybean stubble.
16:10"Thanksgiving's the loneliest day of the
16:12year for an old widowerower," he said.
16:14"You know that? Everybody's got
16:16somewhere to be." Then he said, "I'll
16:19think about it." I didn't know if he'd
16:21come. I didn't think about it much after
16:23that. I was too busy thinking about the
16:25pie. And that's the last thing I want
16:27you to hold on to before we go back to
16:28the hall. I didn't know who PH was.
16:31Melba didn't know there was a card. Very
16:34knew something and wasn't saying. And an
16:36old man on a farm out past Lone Oak was
16:39thinking about whether to put on his
16:40good shirt. I went to bed on Saturday
16:42thinking the worst that could happen was
16:44the $5 laugh one more time. I had no
16:47idea what a good crust could do. So,
16:50back to the fellowship hall. Melba
16:52holding my pie up high. Do I hear $5?
16:55Somebody be charitable. The room
16:57laughing like it always did. Twilight
16:59pulling my sleeve. And at the last table
17:02by the door, Obadia high tower raising
17:04one finger. He wore a white shirt
17:07buttoned all the way to the top and a
17:09brown suit coat that hadn't fit him in a
17:11decade. Melba didn't see him at first.
17:13She was laughing, too. Come on, folks.
17:16$5. It's for the baskets. 500," said
17:19Obadiah. He didn't say it loud. He
17:21didn't have to. He had the kind of voice
17:23that spent 90 years calling cattle. The
17:26room went quiet in rows from the back to
17:28the front as people turned around. Melba
17:31squinted. Mr. High Totower. I said five,
17:34"Honey." "I heard you," Obadiah said.
17:37"500? That's as charitable as I get."
17:40Melba laughed again, uncertain. She
17:42looked at the pie in her hand. She
17:44looked at me. Well, sold, I guess, to
17:48Mr. High Totower for $500. She banged
17:52the little gavvel. Nobody clapped. They
17:54were all watching him. Obadiah stood up.
17:57It took him a minute with the hip. He
17:59leaned on the back of the next chair and
18:01then on the next and walked down the
18:03side of the hall. 150 people watched him
18:06walk. He came all the way to the front
18:08to Melba and her microphone. He didn't
18:11take the pie from her. He just leaned in
18:13and looked at it at the edge. Thumb,
18:16thumb, fork. Thumb, thumb, fork. He bent
18:21close and he breathed in. Then he
18:24straightened up and he looked at Melba
18:26and his eyes were wet. That's Pearl's
18:28buttermilk pie, Melba, he said. I'd know
18:31that crust in the dark. I didn't
18:33understand. Not right away. Pearl P.
18:38Melba frowned. Pearl? Obadiah? That's
18:41Josephine's pie. And honey, buttermilk
18:44pie is a Brumfield family recipe. It's
18:46in the new cookbook, page 112, under my
18:49name. Obadiah looked at the stack of
18:51green cookbooks on the table beside the
18:52auction table. He picked one up. His
18:55hands shook a little, but he found the
18:57page. He held it out at arms length
18:59because he'd left his glasses in the
19:01truck. "Brumfield family buttermilk
19:03pie," he read slowly. "From Melba
19:06Brumfield." He put the book down very
19:08gently. Lerene got that pie from my wife
19:11over a fence in 1969. He said Pearl gave
19:14it to her because Lerene asked. Pearl
19:16gave everybody everything they asked.
19:19But she never gave anybody that crust.
19:21She kept that crust for me. He looked at
19:24me. So where'd you get it, young lady?
19:26My voice came out small from a card in
19:29the church library in the back of the
19:31old cookbook. It was signed PH. Obadiah
19:35closed his eyes. She put it there. He
19:38said in ' 74 after the book came out
19:40with Lerene's name on her pie. She was
19:43hurt and she wouldn't make a fuss. She
19:45told me she'd put the real one where the
19:47church would always have it and somebody
19:49who cared enough to look would find it
19:50someday. He opened his eyes. 52 years
19:55somebody looked. Melba was holding the
19:57microphone down at her side now.
19:59Obadiah, I'm sure you're remembering
20:01wrong. That was a long time ago. And
20:04from the second table, Verie Halcom
20:06stood up, 79 years old, in her church
20:09cardigan with her coffee cup in her
20:11hand. "He's not remembering wrong,
20:13Melba." Verie said, "I typed that
20:15cookbook in 1974. I was the secretary.
20:19Pearl High Totower sent in the
20:20buttermilk pie. Lerene was the committee
20:22chair. She had me take Pearl's name off
20:25and put her own on the night before it
20:26went to the printer." Very set her cup
20:29down. I was 27 and I didn't say a word.
20:32I felt bad about it for 52 years. I saw
20:35it again in your new book Tuesday and I
20:37didn't say a word again. I'm saying it
20:39now. The hall was so quiet you could
20:41hear the coffee earning ticking. Melba's
20:44face went red then white. Then she did
20:46what Melba does. She got angry. Not at
20:49Oadia at me. Josephine, she said into
20:53the microphone without thinking. Did you
20:56take a card out of the church library?
20:57That's church property. I took a
21:00picture. I said. The card's still in the
21:02pocket. You can go look. You knew about
21:04this. You set this up. I didn't know who
21:07PH was until he said PP. I said, "I just
21:10wanted to bake a good pie. You told me
21:12not to bother." Then Melba tried
21:13something else. Her voice went soft.
21:16Obadiah. Honey, it's a recipe. Everybody
21:19shares recipes. Lerene and Pearl were
21:22friends. Does it matter whose names on a
21:24page in a church cookbook? It's all for
21:26the baskets. Obadiah looked at her for a
21:28long moment. Somebody be charitable, you
21:31said," he said quietly. "Well, Pearl
21:34was. She gave that pie to anybody who
21:36asked. She gave it to Lerene over a
21:38fence. She gave it to this church in the
21:40back of a book. All she ever asked for
21:42was her name." He reached into his suit
21:45coat and took out an old checkbook. $500
21:48to the baskets. Make it out to
21:50friendship in memory of Pearl High
21:52Totower. Then Brandy at the end of the
21:55dessert table said, "Mama." Very
21:58quietly, Melba turned. Brandy had her
22:01own pie in front of her, the one Melba
22:03had just bought for $300. Brandy was
22:06looking at the crust, a store crust,
22:08neat and machine crimped all the way
22:10around. "Mama," Brandy said again. "I
22:13buy the crusts at the Kroger." Frozen. I
22:16always have. Grandma did, too. She
22:19looked at me. I never once made it from
22:21scratch. Melba looked at her daughter,
22:24then at the pie in her own hand. Then
22:26she set my pie down on the auction table
22:29very carefully, and she walked out of
22:31the fellowship hall through the kitchen
22:32door without a word. Brother Truit, our
22:35pastor, cleared his throat at the head
22:37table. Well, he said, "Let's pray over
22:40this food before it gets any colder."
22:42And we did. Everybody bowed their heads.
22:45And then 150 people ate Thanksgiving
22:47supper, and every one of them was
22:49talking about the same thing. Obadiah
22:52sat with us. Garland went and got his
22:54plate for him. Twilight sat next to him
22:56and told him she was the one who grated
22:58the butter. He told her she did a fine
23:00job and Pearl would have hired her. He
23:02didn't eat a slice of the pie at the
23:03supper. He held it in his lap covered in
23:06foil the whole meal. When it was time to
23:08go, Garland walked him to his truck. I
23:11carried the pie. At the truck, Obadiah
23:13took it from me. He held it in both
23:15hands. I'm going to eat this at Pearl's
23:17table, he said. Tonight, if you don't
23:19mind. It's yours, I said. You paid $500
23:22for it. I'd have paid $5,000, he said.
23:25And he drove off down Route 45 in the
23:28dark slowly with the pie on the seat
23:30beside him. On Monday, I drove up his
23:33lane with a seed catalog and nothing
23:35else. He was on the porch in his canvas
23:37coat, the way he always was, but there
23:40was something different. He'd shaved
23:43hard frost last night. He said, "Told
23:45you." He was quiet a while. Then he
23:48said, "I set two plates." I didn't
23:51understand at first. Last night at the
23:54kitchen table, I set Pearl's plate, the
23:56one with the blue rim. I haven't taken
23:58it down since 2006. He looked out at the
24:02field. I cut two slices. I ate mine.
24:05Then I sat there a long time. Then I ate
24:07hers, too, because she'd have called me
24:09a fool for wasting it. I sat down on the
24:12porch step below him. I didn't say
24:14anything. 20 years, he said. I've eaten
24:17a lot of buttermilk pie in 20 years.
24:20Church ladies bring it. Diner in Lone
24:21Oak makes one. None of it was hers. I'd
24:24quit expecting it to be. And then you
24:26held it up in that hall. And I could
24:28smell it from the back table. He shook
24:30his head. Thumb, thumb, fork. She did
24:34that so she'd know her own pie at the
24:36auction from Lerans. That was her whole
24:38joke. 50 years and it still worked. He
24:41reached down and patted my shoulder
24:43twice, the way you'd pat a good horse.
24:45Thank you, young lady," he said, for
24:48looking. I drove the rest of my route
24:50that day with my sunglasses on, though
24:51it was cloudy. It should have ended
24:53there. It didn't. Melba didn't call for
24:56a week. She didn't call Garland. She
24:58didn't come to church on Wednesday
24:59night. On Thanksgiving Day, she had
25:02Bry's family to her house and didn't
25:03invite us. Garland and I and the kids
25:06ate at a Cracker Barrel off the
25:07interstate. Koi said it was the best
25:09Thanksgiving of his life because he got
25:11pancakes. On the Saturday after
25:13Thanksgiving, Garland drove over to his
25:15mother's house by himself. He was gone
25:18two hours. When he came back, he sat in
25:20the truck in our driveway for a while
25:22before he came in. "What did she say?" I
25:25asked. "Mostly she yelled." He hung up
25:28his keys. She said, "You humiliated her
25:30in front of the whole church." I said,
25:32"Mama, you held up my wife's pie for 11
25:35years and asked people to be
25:36charitable." She said, "That was
25:38different. That was a joke." I said.
25:40Then it's a joke now, too. Laugh,
25:43garland. I know. He rubbed his face.
25:46That's when she threw me out. He sat
25:48down at the kitchen table. But before
25:50she did, she asked me something. She
25:52asked if Grandma Lerene ever said
25:54anything to me about Pearl High Tower. I
25:56said, "I was a kid. Mama, I don't know."
25:59She said, "Well, she never said anything
26:01to me either." And then she got real
26:03quiet. He looked at me. I don't think
26:06she's mad at you, Joe. I think she's
26:08scared. It's true. And at the women's
26:10committee meeting on the 1st of
26:11December, Melba came back swinging. She
26:14had the remaining cookbooks in boxes in
26:16the church parlor. 212 of them. 88 had
26:19sold at the auction before Obadiah stood
26:21up. These are printed, Melba said to the
26:24committee. Paid for. They stay as they
26:26are. We are not going to reprint 300
26:29cookbooks because a 91-year-old man got
26:31emotional at a pie auction. And because
26:33Josephine went digging through the
26:34church library looking for a way to
26:36embarrass me. I wasn't looking for
26:38anything. I said I was looking for a
26:40recipe. Verie was 27. Melba went on 50
26:44years ago. People misremember. Lerene
26:47was a fine woman and she's not here to
26:49defend herself. She folded her arms. And
26:52Obadia is 91. Poor man. He probably
26:55thinks every buttermilk pie is his
26:57wife's. That was when Verie said, "Then
27:00let's ask him." And [snorts] the door of
27:01the church parlor opened and Obadiah
27:03Hightowwer came in. He had a cane and
27:06brother Truit had his other elbow. Under
27:08his arm, he had a wooden box. It was
27:11about the size of a shoe box made of
27:12walnut with a brass latch and a little
27:15brass plate on the lid. The plate said
27:17Pearl. Verie had called him. She told me
27:20later she'd been calling him every week
27:22since the supper. She said it was the
27:24most she'd talked to a man on the
27:25telephone since 1980. Obadia sat down at
27:28the end of the table. He put the box in
27:30front of him. He opened it. Inside were
27:33recipe cards, hundreds of them, all in
27:36that same beautiful blue cursive. PP's
27:39recipe box, he said. Her mother made it.
27:42I haven't opened it since she passed.
27:442006. My niece kept telling me to donate
27:46it. He touched the cards. Couldn't. He
27:49went through them with his big shaking
27:51fingers until he found one. He pulled it
27:54out and put it on the table. Buttermilk
27:56pie pearls 1964. The same recipe, the
28:00same crust, the same instructions.
28:03Thumb, thumb, fork. So you know it's
28:05mine. Dated 5 years before Lerene got it
28:08over the fence. Melba didn't say
28:10anything. There's something else. Obadia
28:13said behind it. Tucked behind the card
28:16in the box was an envelope, small and
28:19pale blue, the old kind with a stamp
28:21that cost 10 cents. It was addressed to
28:23Mrs. Pearl High Tower, Route Two, Lone
28:26Oak, in a different handwriting. Upright
28:29and square. Obadiah handed it across the
28:31table. Not to me, to Melba. I'd like you
28:35to read it, he said. It's from your
28:36mother-in-law. Melba looked at the
28:38envelope a long time. Then she took out
28:40her reading glasses and unfolded the
28:42letter. She read it silently first. Her
28:45mouth moved. Then Brother Truit said
28:47gently, "Melba, would you read it to
28:50us?" And she did. Her voice wasn't
28:52steady. Dear Pearl,
28:55I am so ashamed. The cookbook came back
28:58from the printer today, and your pie has
29:00my name on it. I did it, not the
29:02printer. I wanted something of mine to
29:04be famous, and I knew yours was the best
29:07pie in the county, and I took it. I have
29:09no excuse. You have been nothing but
29:12kind to me since the day we moved in
29:13down the road. I'll tell the committee
29:15if you want me to. Please tell me what
29:17you want me to do. Your friend, if
29:19you'll still have me, Lerene. Melba put
29:22the letter down on the table. The parlor
29:24was quiet. Pearl wrote her back. Obadiah
29:27said, "I remember it." Pearl said, "Keep
29:30the name, Lerene. It's just a pie, but
29:33I'll keep the crust." He smiled a
29:35little. They were friends 40 more years.
29:38Pearl took her soup when she was sick.
29:40Lerene sat with Pearl at the end in
29:422006. Every Thanksgiving, Lerene made
29:45that pie with a store crust and brought
29:47it to our house, and Pearl ate it and
29:49said it was very nice. And then she'd
29:51make her own with the real crust and
29:53bring it to the auction and I'd buy it
29:54back for her every year. $200, 300,
29:58didn't matter. It was the only thing I
30:00ever bid on. He folded his hands on the
30:02walnut box. When Pearl died, I quit
30:05bidding and I quit coming. Melba took
30:08off her glasses. I didn't know, she
30:11said. Lerene never told me. She gave me
30:14that recipe card when I married
30:15Garland's daddy. She said it was the
30:17family pie. She said, "This is what
30:19Brumfields bring." "It was what
30:22Brumfields brought," Obadiah said. "It
30:24just wasn't what Brumfields made." Melba
30:27laughed. "It was a broken, surprised
30:30sound." She put her hand over her eyes.
30:32Then she said to the table without
30:34looking up. I told my daughter-in-law
30:37not to bother. I told her she'd
30:39embarrass herself. She lowered her hand.
30:41She looked at me. "I've been holding up
30:43your pie for 11 years for a laugh,
30:45Josephine. and mine was never even mine.
30:49I didn't know what to say, so I said
30:51what was true. You paid our mortgage for
30:534 months, Melba. When Garland hurt his
30:56back, I've never forgotten that. Her
30:58face crumpled a little. That was
31:00different. It wasn't, I said. It was the
31:03best thing anybody in this family ever
31:05did for me. You just never let anybody
31:07hold it up at a microphone. Melba was
31:09quiet for a long time. Then she picked
31:11up one of the green cookbooks from the
31:13box beside her. She opened it to page
31:15112. She took a pen out of her purse and
31:18in her own handwriting she drew a line
31:21through from Melba Brumfield and next to
31:24it she wrote Pearl High Tower. Then she
31:27did the next one and the next. We'll do
31:30them all, she said. Every copy in this
31:32room by [clears throat] hand. And we'll
31:34print a page to go in the front for the
31:3688 we already sold telling the story,
31:39the real one. She looked at Obadiah. If
31:42you'll let us, I'll let you, Obadiah
31:44said, if you spell her name right. Verie
31:46laughed out loud. Brother Truit laughed.
31:49Brandy, who had been sitting very still
31:51at the end of the table, started crying
31:53and laughing at the same time. We stayed
31:55in that parlor until 10:00 that night.
31:58Seven women, a pastor, and a 91-year-old
32:01farmer crossed out a name in 212
32:03cookbooks. Melba did more than anybody.
32:06Her hand cramped, and she switched to
32:08her left and kept going. The front page
32:10went into every book that winter. Very
32:13wrote it. Melba typed it. Well, I typed
32:16it. Melba stood over my shoulder and
32:18corrected my commas, which she was
32:20entitled to. It tells the story of
32:22Pearl's pie. The fence, the card in the
32:25back of the library copy. It quotes
32:28Lerene's letter with Melba's permission
32:30and Pearl's answer the way Obadiah
32:32remembered it. Keep the name Lerene.
32:35It's just a pie, but I'll keep the
32:37crust. And at the end, it prints the
32:39crust instructions word for word from
32:42Pearl's card, including the part about
32:44the fork, so you know it's hers. A week
32:46later, Brandy called me. She had never
32:49once called me in 14 years. "Can you
32:52show me?" she said. "The crust. I've
32:55never made one in my life. Mama always
32:57said the pie was what mattered, not the
32:59crust, and to just buy the good frozen
33:01ones." She was quiet for a second. Do
33:04you know how many times she made me
33:05practice that filling? Every November
33:08since I was 15, she'd stand over me. If
33:11it cracked on top, I had to make another
33:13one. And then she'd bid $300 on it in
33:16front of everybody so they'd know it was
33:17the best. Brandy laughed, but not
33:20happily. I hate buttermilk pie,
33:22Josephine. I've always hated it. So, on
33:25a Tuesday night in December, Brandy came
33:27to my kitchen. Twi showed her how to
33:29grate the butter frozen. Brandy
33:32stretched the dough the first time and
33:33it shrank out of spite and she said a
33:35word I won't repeat on a church story.
33:38The second time she didn't stretch it.
33:39She took that pie home and ate half of
33:41it by herself. She told me later it was
33:44the first buttermilk pie she'd ever
33:46liked. Obadiah kept coming to church
33:48after that every Sunday. Garland picks
33:51him up because of the hip. He sits in
33:53the fourth pew with Verie and they argue
33:55about the weather. And on the first
33:57Saturday in January, Obadiah called me
33:59at home, which he had never done. "Come
34:01out to the house," he said, "and bring
34:03that girl who grates butter." So
34:05Twilight and I drove out past Lone Oak
34:07to the white house at the end of the
34:09gravel lane. He had a fire going in the
34:11kitchen stove. On the table was the
34:13walnut box with the brass plate that
34:15said Pearl. He pushed it across the
34:17table to me. "Pearl and I never had
34:19children," he said. We tried. It didn't
34:22happen. She always said she'd give this
34:24to the right woman someday. somebody
34:26who'd look. He nodded at Twi and after
34:29you to her. He put his old hand on
34:32Twilight's. There's 400 and some cards
34:34in there. Nobody's baked half of them
34:36since 2006. You've got some work to do.
34:39Twi looked at the box like it was made
34:41of gold. Can I come back and ask you
34:43what they mean? She said, "Like the fork
34:45thing?" "You'd better," said Obadiah.
34:48"She goes out there every other Saturday
34:50now. I drop her off on my route. They
34:52bake one card at a time in Pearl's
34:55kitchen. He sits at the table and tells
34:57her what Pearl used to say, and Twilight
34:59writes it on the back of the card in
35:00pencil. He eats whatever she makes and
35:03says it's very nice. Then he says, "Now
35:05make it again and don't stretch it." The
35:08auction that year raised more than any
35:10year before. Obadia's $500 alone was
35:13more than the whole auction used to
35:15raise in the 1970s. with the cookbooks
35:18and everything else. The church packed
35:2061 Thanksgiving baskets that week
35:22instead of the usual 40. I know where a
35:24lot of them went. I'm a rural carrier.
35:26Brother Truit asked me which houses on
35:28my route could use one and wouldn't ask.
35:30I gave him 11 addresses. I didn't put
35:33any names on the list, just mailbox
35:35numbers. That spring, Melba asked me if
35:38I'd teach a pie class to the youth group
35:40at church. 12 teenagers in the
35:42fellowship hall kitchen on a Wednesday
35:44night. Pearl's Crust," Melba said.
35:46"Nobody in this county can make it but
35:48you and Twilight." "You could learn it,"
35:50I said. "Then put me on the list," Melba
35:53said. And she came. She stood at the end
35:55of the counter with the teenagers, 65
35:58years old, grading frozen butter. She
36:00stretched it, and it shrank on her out
36:02of spite. She laughed so hard she had to
36:05sit down. Brandy was there, too. Brandy
36:07stretched hers, too. After the class,
36:10when the teenagers had gone, Melba
36:12stayed to help me wipe down the
36:13counters. She worked in silence for a
36:15while. Then she reached into her purse
36:17and took out an index card in a plastic
36:19sleeve. It was Lerene's card, the one
36:22she'd been given when she married into
36:24the family. Buttermilk pie in that
36:26upright square handwriting. Same
36:28filling. And at the bottom where Pearl's
36:31card had half a page about the crust,
36:33Lerene just said, "Crust storebought is
36:35fine. I want you to have this." Melba
36:38said, "Put it in Pearl's box behind hers
36:41where it belongs." Melba, that's your
36:43family's card. It's a copy of somebody
36:46else's, she said. And it's honest about
36:48the crust, at least. She pressed it into
36:51my hand. I've been thinking about what
36:52you said about the mortgage that nobody
36:55ever held it up at a microphone. She
36:57looked at the counter. I'd like to be
36:59the kind of woman people remember for
37:01the mortgage, Josephine. Not the $5. I
37:04put the card in my apron pocket. That
37:06night, I tucked it into the walnut box
37:08behind pearls. Obadia said that was
37:10fitting. He said the two of them were
37:12always better together. Anyway, Koi
37:14came, which surprised me. He made the
37:16best crust in the class. He says it's
37:19because of the vinegar. I think it's
37:20because he wanted to. And then last
37:22November came around again. The
37:24fellowship hall was full. More than 150
37:27this time. Word had gotten around about
37:30the pie auction at Friendship Baptist.
37:32People from other churches came. Melba
37:34was at the microphone with her little
37:35wooden gavvel. Brandy brought a
37:37buttermilk pie, a scratch crust this
37:40time, a little lopsided. Melba didn't
37:42bid it up. She let the room do it. It
37:45went for $110 to Bry's own husband,
37:48Elvin, which everyone agreed was fair.
37:50Then Melba picked up my pie. She held it
37:53up high in one hand, the way she always
37:55had. She turned it so everybody could
37:57see the crust. Thumb, thumb, fork. The
38:01room went quiet. Everybody was waiting.
38:03Next, we have a pie, Melba said. from my
38:06daughter-in-law, Josephine. It's Pearl
38:08High Tower's buttermilk pie with Pearl's
38:11crust, and she's the only grown woman in
38:13this county who can make it." Melba
38:15paused. "Do I hear $5?" The whole room
38:18laughed, but it was a different laugh.
38:20Everybody was in on it now. And from the
38:22fourth table, Obadiah High Totower, 92
38:25years old, in his white shirt, buttoned
38:28to the top, raised one finger. "500," he
38:31said. "That's as charitable as I get."
38:33Melba banged the gavvel so fast she
38:35nearly dropped it. Sold. And then for
38:38the first time in 12 years, the room
38:41clapped for my pie. I've thought a lot
38:43about why Melba did what she did all
38:45those years. I don't think she was
38:47cruel. I think she believed something
38:49she'd been handed and she built her
38:51pride on it. When you build your pride
38:53on a pie, you need somebody else's pie
38:55to be the joke. She never knew her own
38:57was borrowed. And I've thought about
38:59Pearl, a farm wife who was told her name
39:02didn't belong in a book and who didn't
39:03make a fuss. She just tucked the truth
39:06in the back of the church's copy and
39:07trusted that someday somebody would care
39:09enough to look. I didn't go looking for
39:12justice. I went looking for a crust.
39:14Sometimes that's how you find out who
39:16someone really was. Last week, Twilight
39:18made Pearl's coconut cream pie, card
39:21number 209, for Oadia's birthday. She
39:24did the meringue herself. He ate two
39:26pieces and said it was very nice. Then
39:28he said, "Now make it again." The
39:31barn-shaped mailbox at the end of his
39:32lane got a fresh coat of paint this
39:34fall. Garland did it. You can read the
39:36letters now. Plain as day. O and P High
39:40Tower. So now I'd like to ask you, say
39:43you'd found that card in the back of the
39:44old cookbook. Would you have baked the
39:46pie and stayed quiet or taken the card
39:49straight to your mother-in-law? Tell me
39:51in the comments, is there a recipe in
39:53your family with a story behind it? A
39:55grandmother's card, a secret ingredient,
39:57a name that got left off. I'd love to
40:00hear it and where you're listening from
40:02tonight. If you treasure stories about
40:04kindness, credit, and the quiet women
40:06who deserved it, subscribe and join me
40:08for the next

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