Sister-In-Law Broke My Nose With Wedding Album For Refusing Venue Fee—The Facial CT Scans Reached... — Transcript

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1. 0:00The venue cost $18,000 for 6 hours.
2. 0:03Ashley sent me the invoice on a
3. 0:05Wednesday morning with a message, "Your
4. 0:07share. Pay by Friday so I can secure the
5. 0:09date." My share for her wedding to my
6. 0:12brother. I read the email twice while
7. 0:14drinking coffee at my kitchen table. The
8. 0:16Riverside Estate, waterfront views,
9. 0:19capacity for 300 guests, champagne
10. 0:23fountain included. I typed back, "I
11. 0:25can't contribute to the venue cost.
12. 0:27Congratulations on the engagement
13. 0:29though." My phone rang within 30
14. 0:31seconds. "You can't contribute."
15. 0:34Ashley's voice was already elevated.
16. 0:36"What do you mean you can't contribute?"
17. 0:39"I mean I don't have $18,000 to spend on
18. 0:42someone else's wedding venue." I said
19. 0:44calmly. "That's more than a year of my
20. 0:46car payments. Your brother is getting
21. 0:49married. This is a family event." And
22. 0:51I'll happily attend as a guest, but I'm
23. 0:53not financing the location. "Everyone
24. 0:56else is chipping in. Your parents are
25. 0:58covering the catering. Uncle Robert is
26. 1:01paying for flowers. This is how families
27. 1:04work, Sarah." Those are their choices.
28. 1:06I'm choosing not to pay for a venue.
29. 1:09Silence. "Then we'll discuss this at
30. 1:11Sunday dinner." She hung up. Sunday
31. 1:14dinner at my parents' house had been a
32. 1:16tradition for 12 years. Mom cooked, Dad
33. 1:19grilled, and the family gathered around
34. 1:21the table on the back patio. Usually it
35. 1:23was pleasant. This Sunday felt different
36. 1:26the moment I walked in. Ashley was
37. 1:28already there wearing white, a
38. 1:30deliberate choice I assumed. She had a
39. 1:32three-ring binder open on the counter
40. 1:34labeled wedding planning in gold
41. 1:36letters. My brother stood beside her
42. 1:39looking uncomfortable. "Sarah's here,"
43. 1:41Ashley announced to the room. "Maybe now
44. 1:44we can settle the venue situation." Mom
45. 1:46looked up from the salad she was making.
46. 1:49"What venue situation?" "I sent Sarah
47. 1:51the invoice for the Riverside Estate 3
48. 1:54days ago. She's refusing to pay her
49. 1:56share." Her share? Dad turned from the
50. 1:59grill. Why would Sarah pay for your
51. 2:01venue? Ashley's smile tightened. Because
52. 2:04family contributes to weddings. You're
53. 2:07covering catering. Robert is doing
54. 2:09flowers. Everyone has a role. We offered
55. 2:13to cover catering. Mom said carefully.
56. 2:16Nobody assigned Sarah a venue fee. Well,
57. 2:19someone needs to pay for it. The venue
58. 2:21requires a deposit by next Friday or we
59. 2:23lose our date. I set down my purse.
60. 2:27Ashley, I told you Wednesday. I can't
61. 2:29afford $18,000 for a venue. That's not
62. 2:32changing. Can't or won't? Both. Her face
63. 2:36flushed. This is my dream wedding. The
64. 2:38venue overlooks the water. There's a
65. 2:41fountain. The photos will be incredible.
66. 2:44Then you and my brother should pay for
67. 2:46it. We're already paying for the
68. 2:47honeymoon, the dress, the photographer,
69. 2:50the band. Those are all choices you're
70. 2:52making. I interrupted. I support your
71. 2:55marriage. I don't support a $75,000
72. 2:59wedding that requires family members to
73. 3:01take on debt. Ashley slammed the binder
74. 3:03shut. You're being selfish. I'm being
75. 3:06realistic. My brother finally spoke.
76. 3:09Ashley, maybe we should look at less
77. 3:11expensive venues. No. She cut him off.
78. 3:14I've dreamed about the Riverside estate
79. 3:16since I was 12. I'm not settling for
80. 3:19some cheap banquet hall because your
81. 3:21sister won't help family. I am helping.
82. 3:24I said. I'm helping by not encouraging
83. 3:26financial irresponsibility.
84. 3:29Ashley's jaw clenched. She picked up the
85. 3:31binder and walked out to the patio.
86. 3:33Dinner was tense. Ashley barely spoke to
87. 3:36me. Every time someone mentioned the
88. 3:39wedding, she'd glance in my direction
89. 3:40with obvious irritation. Dessert was
90. 3:43finishing when she brought it up again.
91. 3:45I've been thinking. Ashley said about
92. 3:48the venue situation. Sarah, what if we
93. 3:50worked out a payment plan? You could pay
94. 3:53$1,500
95. 3:54a month for 12 months. No, you didn't
96. 3:57even consider it because the answer is
97. 4:00no. I'm not paying for your venue in
98. 4:02installments or lump sum. She stood
99. 4:05abruptly. Fine, then I guess my wedding
100. 4:08will be ruined because you're too cheap
101. 4:10to help family. Ashley, my brother
102. 4:12started. She walked inside. I heard her
103. 4:16footsteps going upstairs toward my
104. 4:18parents home office. Mom side. This is
105. 4:21getting out of hand. She'll calm down.
106. 4:23Dad said, though he didn't sound
107. 4:26convinced. I helped clear dishes. 10
108. 4:29minutes later, Ashley came back
109. 4:31downstairs carrying something large. It
110. 4:33was my parents wedding album. The
111. 4:35massive leather bound one that lived on
112. 4:37the office shelf.
113. 4:3915 pounds of photos and memories from
114. 4:411989.
115. 4:43Ashley, what are you doing with that?
116. 4:45Mom asked. Ashley walked directly to
117. 4:48where I stood at the sink. She held the
118. 4:50album against her chest. This represents
119. 4:53family, she said. Commitment, support,
120. 4:56everything you're not showing me right
121. 4:58now. Put Mom's album back, I said
122. 5:01quietly. Pay for my dream venue or I'll
123. 5:04destroy you, Ashley screamed. It
124. 5:07happened fast. She swung the album like
125. 5:10a bat. The hard cover corner, thick,
126. 5:13reinforced with metal edging from the
127. 5:151980s, caught me directly across the
128. 5:17bridge of my nose. I heard the crack
129. 5:20before I felt the pain. Then blood,
130. 5:22everywhere. It poured from my nose, down
131. 5:25my mouth, onto my shirt. I stumbled
132. 5:28backward against the counter. My vision
133. 5:30blurred. Someone was screaming. Maybe
134. 5:33Mom, maybe me. The album hit the floor
135. 5:36with a thud. I pressed my hand to my
136. 5:39face and it came away dark red. Oh my
137. 5:41god, my brother said. Ashley, what did
138. 5:44you? She wasn't listening. Ashley's
139. 5:47voice was shrill. I told her how
140. 5:49important this was. Dad grabbed a
141. 5:51kitchen towel and pressed it to my face.
142. 5:54Head back, apply pressure. Jesus,
143. 5:57Ashley. The towel soaked through in
144. 5:59seconds. We need to get her to the
145. 6:02hospital. Mom said, her voice shaking.
146. 6:05My brother grabbed his keys. I'll drive.
147. 6:08Ashley stood frozen in the kitchen
148. 6:10staring at her hands. The ER took me
149. 6:13back immediately. Blood pouring from
150. 6:15your nose gets attention. The nurse
151. 6:17documented everything. What happened? My
152. 6:20sister-in-law hit me with a wedding
153. 6:22album. I said through the towel. My
154. 6:25voice sounded strange, nasal. She wrote
155. 6:28that down verbatim. Did she hit you
156. 6:30intentionally? Yes. Was this during an
157. 6:33argument? She wanted me to pay $18,000
158. 6:37for her wedding venue. I refused, she
159. 6:39assaulted me. More notes. We'll need to
160. 6:42take photos of the injury. And we're
161. 6:44required to file a police report for
162. 6:47assault cases. Is that acceptable? Yes.
163. 6:50They took 11 photos. Front view, both
164. 6:53sides, close-ups of the swelling, the
165. 6:56blood matting my hair. My shirt soaked
166. 6:59dark red. Then x-rays. Then a CT scan.
167. 7:03The ER doctor came back with images on a
168. 7:05tablet. Your nasal bone is fractured in
169. 7:08two places. You also have a deviated
170. 7:11septum. The cartilage that divides your
171. 7:14nostrils is displaced.
172. 7:15You're going to need reconstructive
173. 7:17surgery. How soon? We'll refer you to an
174. 7:20ENT specialist. The swelling needs to
175. 7:23reduce first, probably 7 to 10 days. But
176. 7:26this will require surgical correction.
177. 7:29He typed on his laptop. I'm documenting
178. 7:32this as assault with a blunt object
179. 7:34causing severe mid-face trauma. The CT
180. 7:37scans and x-rays will be sent to our ENT
181. 7:40consultation network for surgical
182. 7:42planning. Are you comfortable with that?
183. 7:44Yes, good. You'll likely hear from
184. 7:47multiple surgeons. Complex facial
185. 7:50reconstructions often involve
186. 7:52consultations from several specialists.
187. 7:55A police officer arrived while they were
188. 7:57setting my broken nose temporarily. I
189. 7:59gave a statement, described the
190. 8:02argument, the threat, the weapon. We'll
191. 8:05need to take the wedding album as
192. 8:06evidence, the officer said. My brother
193. 8:10had brought it, still stained with my
194. 8:12blood. The officer photographed it,
195. 8:14bagged it, documented the metal edged
196. 8:17corner. This is a deadly weapon charge,
197. 8:20he said. Assault with a deadly weapon
198. 8:22causing great bodily injury.
199. 8:25Your sister-in-law is looking at felony
200. 8:27prosecution. They sent me home with pain
201. 8:30medication, ice packs, and an
202. 8:32appointment card for Dr. Patricia
203. 8:34Hendricks, ENT surgeon. The following
204. 8:37Tuesday, the police arrested Ashley at
205. 8:40my parents' house that night. My brother
206. 8:42called at 11:00 p.m. His voice wrecked.
207. 8:45They took her in handcuffs, he said.
208. 8:48Sarah, I'm so sorry. I had no idea she'd
209. 8:52I know. The wedding's off. Obviously, I
210. 8:55can't marry someone who'd do that. I'm
211. 8:57sorry. Don't apologize. You were right
212. 9:00about everything. The venue, the
213. 9:02spending, all of it. I just didn't want
214. 9:05to see it. We hung up. I couldn't sleep.
215. 9:08Every time I shifted position, pain shot
216. 9:11through my face. Tuesday's appointment
217. 9:13lasted 90 minutes. Dr. Hendricks
218. 9:16examined the CT scans, took new photos,
219. 9:20documented the deviation. This is
220. 9:22significant trauma, she said. The nasal
221. 9:25bone fractures are clean, but the septal
222. 9:28deviation is severe. You'll have
223. 9:30breathing issues if we don't correct it.
224. 9:32I'm recommending septorhinoplasty,
225. 9:35reconstructive surgery to repair both
226. 9:37the bone structure and the internal
227. 9:39cartilage. When? 4 weeks. We need the
228. 9:43initial swelling completely resolved.
229. 9:45She clicked through images on her
230. 9:47screen. I'm also sending your scans to
231. 9:50our regional ENT network. Cases
232. 9:52involving assault often require
233. 9:55additional documentation for legal
234. 9:57purposes. And complex reconstructions
235. 10:00benefit from peer consultation. How many
236. 10:02doctors will review it? At least 10 in
237. 10:05our network. Maybe more if we need
238. 10:07specialized input for the
239. 10:08reconstruction. She printed information
240. 10:11about the surgery. Recovery time? 6
241. 10:14weeks minimum. Risks? Infection,
242. 10:17scarring, breathing complications. Cost?
243. 10:20$23,000.
244. 10:22Mostly covered by insurance since it was
245. 10:24assault-related. One more thing, Dr.
246. 10:27Hendrix said. I'm required to submit my
247. 10:30findings to the medical review board.
248. 10:32Assault cases involving permanent
249. 10:35disfigurement trigger additional
250. 10:36protocols. You'll likely be contacted by
251. 10:39a victim's advocate. I received emails
252. 10:42from three other ENT surgeons over the
253. 10:44next week. All had reviewed my scans.
254. 10:47All confirmed the surgical plan. All
255. 10:50documented assault with blunt object in
256. 10:52their notes. The victim's advocate
257. 10:54called on Friday. I've reviewed your
258. 10:57case file and the medical documentation.
259. 10:5910 ENT surgeons have now submitted
260. 11:02findings consistent with felony assault
261. 11:04causing permanent injury. The District
262. 11:07Attorney's office is filing charges. Are
263. 11:09you willing to cooperate with
264. 11:11prosecution?
265. 11:13Yes. Good. The medical evidence is
266. 11:15overwhelming. CT scans, surgical
267. 11:19consultations, photographic
268. 11:21documentation. Your sister-in-law's
269. 11:23public defender is going to have a very
270. 11:26difficult case. Ashley's [clears throat]
271. 11:28arraignment was the following Monday. My
272. 11:30brother attended. I didn't. He called
273. 11:33afterward. She pled not guilty. Her
274. 11:36lawyer tried to argue it was an accident
275. 11:38during a heated discussion. The
276. 11:40prosecutor showed the crime scene
277. 11:42photos. The album, the blood, your face,
278. 11:46then showed the CT scans. The judge set
279. 11:49bail at $50,000.
280. 11:51Is she out? Her parents posted it, but
281. 11:53there's a no contact order. She can't
282. 11:56come near you or my parents' house. The
283. 11:58wedding venue canceled and kept the
284. 12:00deposit when they saw the news coverage.
285. 12:03News coverage. Local station had picked
286. 12:05up the story. Bride attacks
287. 12:07sister-in-law over wedding venue
288. 12:09dispute. My surgery was scheduled for
289. 12:12October 15th. 4-hour procedure. Dr.
290. 12:15Hendrix would rebuild the nasal
291. 12:17structure, correct the deviation,
292. 12:20minimize scarring. The good news, she
293. 12:23told me during pre-op, is that your case
294. 12:25has become a teaching example in our
295. 12:27network. We've had requests from medical
296. 12:30students to observe the reconstruction.
297. 12:32If you're comfortable with that, it
298. 12:34helps train future surgeons on
299. 12:36assault-related facial trauma. I'm
300. 12:38comfortable with it. The surgery went
301. 12:40well. I woke up with splints, bandages,
302. 12:43and instructions for 2 weeks of limited
303. 12:46activity. Dr. Hendrix visited during
304. 12:48recovery. Perfect reconstruction. Your
305. 12:51breathing should improve significantly.
306. 12:54The scarring will be minimal, invisible
307. 12:56within 6 months. Ashley's trial was
308. 12:59scheduled for January. The prosecutor
309. 13:01sent me the evidence list in December.
310. 13:0411 photos from the ER, Connecticut
311. 13:06scans, reviewed by 10 specialists,
312. 13:09surgical records, police statements, the
313. 13:12weapon itself, witness testimony from my
314. 13:15parents and brother. This is the most
315. 13:17documented assault case I've handled in
316. 13:195 years, the prosecutor said during our
317. 13:22meeting. 10 medical professionals have
318. 13:25submitted findings. All confirm severe
319. 13:27trauma from blunt object. Your
320. 13:30sister-in-law is facing 3 to 7 years.
321. 13:33The trial lasted 4 days. Ashley's
322. 13:35defense tried to claim I'd provoked her.
323. 13:38That family disputes sometimes
324. 13:40escalated. That she hadn't meant to
325. 13:42cause serious injury. Then the
326. 13:44prosecution showed the CT scan Then the
327. 13:46prosecution showed the CT scans on a
328. 13:49courtroom screen. Showed the fracture
329. 13:51lines, the displaced cartilage. Dr.
330. 13:55Hendrix testified about the severity,
331. 13:57the permanent nature without surgery,
332. 14:00the $23,000
333. 14:01in medical costs. All 10 ENT surgeons
334. 14:05had submitted written statements. The
335. 14:07judge allowed them into evidence. The
336. 14:09jury deliberated for 90 minutes. Guilty
337. 14:12on all counts. Assault with a deadly
338. 14:14weapon, great bodily injury enhancement.
339. 14:17Sentencing was set for February. My
340. 14:20brother filed for annulment of the
341. 14:21engagement. Apparently that was legally
342. 14:24possible in our state. He moved out of
343. 14:26the apartment he'd shared with Ashley. I
344. 14:29keep thinking about what she said. He
345. 14:31told me over coffee in January that you
346. 14:34were destroying her dream wedding. She
347. 14:36actually believed that. Believed she was
348. 14:39entitled to your money, your support,
349. 14:42everything. And when you said no, she
350. 14:44tried to destroy you instead. Some
351. 14:47people don't handle boundaries well.
352. 14:49That's a generous interpretation. Maybe,
353. 14:52but she's paying for it now. Ashley was
354. 14:55sentenced to 4 years in state prison.
355. 14:57The judge cited the premeditated nature,
356. 15:00picking up a weapon, making a verbal
357. 15:02threat, following through with violence,
358. 15:05and the permanent injury requiring
359. 15:07surgical correction. You scarred your
360. 15:09sister-in-law for life over a wedding
361. 15:11venue, the judge said. That demonstrates
362. 15:14a profound lack of character and respect
363. 15:17for human dignity. My nose healed
364. 15:19completely. Dr. Hendrix was right. The
365. 15:22scarring became invisible. My breathing
366. 15:25actually improved. The medical bills
367. 15:27were covered by victim's compensation
368. 15:30and Ashley's restitution payments, which
369. 15:32would continue for years. My brother
370. 15:35started dating someone new in March.
371. 15:37Someone who didn't dream about $18,000
372. 15:40venues or think family members were
373. 15:42personal ATMs. And somewhere in a state
374. 15:45correctional facility, Ashley had 4
375. 15:48years to think about the cost of her
376. 15:50dream wedding. The venue would have been
377. 15:52beautiful, I'm sure, but not as
378. 15:54beautiful as being able to breathe
379. 15:56clearly through a nose that healed
380. 15:58properly because 10 ENT surgeons cared
381. 16:01enough to document everything.