YT YouTube2Text

YouTube2Text → Transcripts → Shocked? Confused? Why I Hid This Channel From My Family — Until Now | Being a Chinese Youtuber

Shocked? Confused? Why I Hid This Channel From My Family — Until Now | Being a Chinese Youtuber — Transcript

by GuYi Alone · 2,883 words · 415 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

Open in transcriber Summarize with AI Download SRT/VTT

Full transcript

0:00Hi, this is GuYi
0:03I’ve mentioned before that I haven’t told my family
0:07about my YouTube channel
0:09There are many reasons for that
0:13One big one is I know deep down this channel isn’t stable
0:19and it probably won’t last forever
0:24It’s been half a year since I started on YouTube
0:29I share my daily life
0:31my stories and what’s on my mind here
0:35and I’ve hit 80k subscribers now
0:41To outsiders
0:43that’s pretty good growth
0:45But I know the truth
0:48People stick around not because my life is super interesting
0:54or because I’m some special person
0:57It’s definitely not because I look plain
1:00without makeup or nice clothes
1:06A lot of it comes down to where I live — China
1:12a place many viewers only hear about in the news
1:17Lately
1:18lots of Chinese creators like me have popped up on YouTube
1:25Life vlogs don’t have a high bar to get into
1:30With AI tools
1:32plenty of people can put out videos
1:35even if they don’t speak much English
1:41The economy here is tough
1:43and many people have lost their jobs
1:47So more and more are trying this out
1:51hoping it can be a way forward
1:54But YouTube might not be that way out
1:59I keep wondering:
2:01what happens when the novelty wears off?
2:06When people are no longer curious about
2:09what ordinary Chinese people’s daily lives look like?
2:15Then tons of channels like mine will slowly fade away
2:26There’s a simple truth:
2:28things that come easy often slip away just as easily
2:34That’s why every time I upload
2:37I mentally prepare myself — this could be my last video
2:46I know this attention might die down soon
2:51Maybe in a few months
2:54maybe half a year
2:55almost certainly within a year
3:01That’s why only one close coworker at my company
3:05knows about my channel
3:09I’ve never said a word to my parents
3:16I’ve been working far from home for years
3:20I’m used to telling them only the good news
3:23and hiding the hard parts
3:28We don’t talk all that often
3:30Every time we call
3:32when they ask how I’m doing
3:34I always say the same thing:
3:37I’m fine
3:40But after hanging up
3:42sitting in my tiny rental room in the urban village
3:46or at my desk tucked in the corner of the office
3:51I look out at all the lights of this city
3:55Not a single one belongs to me
3:59I often stare and wonder:
4:02what exactly is “fine” about this?
4:07I just don’t want my family thousands of miles away
4:11to worry or feel disappointed in me
4:17Over these years
4:19my mom has asked several times if she could come visit
4:25Every single time
4:27I made up excuses to put her off
4:31I told her I was swamped with work
4:35and wouldn’t have time to show her around
4:40She said she didn’t need me to keep her company;
4:44she could wander by herself
4:47Then I came up with another reason:
4:50you can’t read traffic lights
4:52you don’t know how to use navigation
4:55you’d struggle to find subway entrances
4:58The roads are busy
5:00what if something happens?
5:02And Shenzhen isn’t a cozy place to live
5:05there aren’t many nice sights to see
5:08It wouldn’t be worth the trip
5:15After I turned her down again and again
5:19she slowly stopped bringing it up
5:22Most of those were just excuses
5:26The real reason I was scared to have her come is plain and simple
5:37My parents aren’t wealthy
5:40but they saved for decades to build a spacious house back home
5:53Water heaters, air conditioners
5:56internet — they’ve got everything set up
6:02Compared to that
6:03my cramped little rental and the crowded
6:07run-down neighborhood around it is a huge contrast
6:15In her head
6:17she imagines I’m living a bright
6:19comfortable life in Shenzhen
6:23not squeezed into an old urban village that feels like a slum
6:32I know my mom too well
6:35I was afraid she’d travel all this way
6:38see how I actually live
6:41and feel heartbroken and let down
6:49Funny thing is
6:50it’s not just her who paints a nicer picture of my life
6:58After living in the city for so long
7:01I’ve also romanticized life back in the countryside
7:09especially what it’s like for elderly people living alone
7:18I used to think she had an easy
7:21quiet life
7:23I even envied her sometimes:
7:27no job, no boss to answer to
7:30no overtime
7:32Dad and I earn money outside
7:36so she doesn’t have to stress about making ends meet
7:49But going home this time made me truly see all the hard parts
7:54I’d missed before
7:57Rural life is nowhere near as convenient
8:03No food delivery
8:04no handy neighborhood services
8:09No matter how tired she is or how she feels
8:13she still has to cook three meals a day
8:20Our village is small
8:22not many families live here
8:25Even a general store can barely stay open
8:30To buy basic supplies
8:32she has to walk to the next village
8:37If she wants more things
8:39she has to make a special trip into town
8:46Public transport out here isn’t great
8:52Roads used to be rough
8:54so people walked everywhere
9:04The roads are paved now
9:06and most people get around on electric scooters or motorbikes
9:28Older folks who can’t ride will walk to town together
9:33when they need groceries
9:35then share a ride back to save money
9:42<i>-I remember I learned to ride a bike on this road years ago, right?</i> <i>-Yeah</i>
9:50My mom, like me
9:52never learned to ride a bike （until recent years）
9:55But all the inconvenience of country life
9:58pushed her to learn how to ride a motorbike
10:04She fell a few times while learning and had a small accident
10:11She still carries an old rib injury from it
10:36It’s different in the city
10:38You can get anywhere you need to go without ever learning to ride
10:59Dad and I are away most of the year
11:02so she’s usually alone at home
11:07When an appliance breaks
11:09or something around the house goes wrong
11:14she can’t fix it
11:17Calling someone to come repair it means worrying about being overcharged
11:24She hates spending money to replace things
11:40so she makes do and waits for Dad (or me) to come back
11:44and sort it out
12:04She doesn’t have a job or income of her own
12:08Every cent she spends comes from Dad and me
12:13It sounds stress-free
12:17but that setup leaves her financially vulnerable
12:22She doesn’t feel secure
12:24so she’s always very careful with money
12:33That’s why whenever I go home
12:36I try to take more off her plate
12:40I help her make decisions on big and small things
13:23Once I settled into my job in Shenzhen
13:27I sent her 1000 yuan every month for living costs
13:33These past few months
13:35I upped it to 1500
13:39I’ve felt a little guilty
13:42I keep talking about her in my videos
13:45and she has no idea
13:48It often feels like I’m talking about her behind her back
13:54The only way I know how to make it up
13:57is to give her more financial support
14:05It’s still not a lot
14:08but it helps her breathe easier
14:13When she asked why I sent more
14:16I told her I’d gotten a raise
14:19Then recently, things shifted
14:28I have a younger cousin
14:30She’s really smart and highly educated
14:35Right after graduation
14:37she landed a great job with a high salary
14:42— almost five times what I make
14:54Overnight
14:55she became the family’s big success story
15:01Grandma lives next door to Mom
15:05So every chance she gets
15:08she tells Mom how amazing her job is and how much she earns
15:16She brags about her to the neighbors too
15:21Next to her
15:22me and my other cousins look pretty ordinary
15:28Grandma is gentle and has always been kind to me
15:34even though we’re not blood-related
15:47But hearing those words stings for Mom
15:53I’ve always known where Mom’s soft spot is
15:58She married my stepdad when she was 37
16:08Back then
16:09everyone in the family hoped she’d have another child with him
16:14to hold the marriage together
16:18In the end, it never happened
16:23For all these years
16:24her health hasn’t been good enough for her to work away from home
16:31And when I first moved to Shenzhen
16:34I barely earned anything
16:38Almost all the weight of supporting the family fell on Dad
16:43In this household
16:45she’s often felt like she doesn’t have much standing
16:50She couldn’t have another child to carry on the family line
16:55and she couldn’t bring in money
17:00Over time
17:01that turned into low self-esteem
17:04and she gets upset easily
17:10A lot of her sudden outbursts aren’t meant to blame anyone
17:17She’s just fighting with how powerless she feels
17:25Rural communities are full of comparisons
17:31People talk about which kids are doing well and which aren’t
17:38Every time she gets pulled into these comparisons
17:42she defends herself and me:
17:45my daughter’s in Shenzhen
17:47she’s doing fine too
17:52But I know she says it without any real confidence
18:00Quite a few relatives have bought homes in cities
18:06living that life she dreams of
18:11She’s still stuck in the countryside
18:15Many of my cousins have settled down and have someone to rely on
18:22while I’m still single
18:29Even if she tries not to compare
18:32other people will line us up and weigh us against each other
18:38It’s hard not to care when you live in that environment
18:47Watching her feel unsteady and quietly sad hurts
18:53After hesitating for a long time
18:56I finally told her about my videos
19:09I said besides my regular job
19:12I make a little extra income from them
19:17She was shocked at first
19:20then took it in quickly
19:25She wasn’t totally new to the idea of me filming
19:41Years ago
19:42when I bought my first DJI camera
19:46I followed her around filming her all the time
19:53Back then it was just for fun
19:56to keep memories
20:12Later
20:12I did work a bit like a reporter in Shenzhen
20:17I wrote interviews and filmed portrait stories
20:23I learned to use better cameras
20:26edit footage
20:28even simple effects
20:30She knew all about that
20:43She also knows online videos can earn money
20:48She scrolls Douyin every day
20:52liking and commenting on creators
20:57Sometimes she watches live streams and buys cheap things there
21:05She understands that the internet makes things possible
21:10that used to sound impossible
21:19Still
21:20I made it clear to her that this extra money isn’t steady
21:26It could disappear anytime
21:32She understood right away
21:35She said our life is plain and ordinary
21:40It’s surprising enough that anyone wants to watch
21:44If people stop watching someday
21:47that’s only natural
21:57She didn’t push me for details about what I talk about in the videos
22:03and she didn’t ask to see them
22:10She doesn’t understand English or how these online platforms work (or VPN)
22:18Unless I send her a link or the video directly
22:24she can’t find my channel
22:28She’ll never know what I say about her here
22:31So she won’t see this video
22:34Even if she somehow did
22:37she wouldn’t understand a word
22:42For her
22:43that’s all she needs to know:
22:46I can save a little more money now
22:51She’s genuinely happy for me
23:03A lot of you left comments on my last few videos saying Mom has great style
23:11way more fashionable than I am
23:14There’s a story behind that
23:19She grew up in the countryside
23:22but she’s different from many women who’ve never left
23:33When she was young
23:35she worked far from home
23:39She lived in Beijing and Shanghai — cities I still haven’t visited
23:48She worked as a nanny for well-off families and waited tables in restaurants
23:57She’s seen the busy
23:59wide world outside
24:08She’s always loved nice clothes
24:13She pays attention to how actors dress on TV
24:21and she’s kept up with skincare all these years
24:27That love for beauty just didn’t pass down to me
24:42Now that she’s older
24:45all those rich
24:47lively experiences from her youth have settled into quiet country days
24:56Her unease isn’t only from family comparisons
25:02Deep down
25:03it comes from loneliness rooted in who she is
25:17She’s told me more than once that in this family
25:21I’m the only person she can fully trust and lean on
25:28Her parents are gone
25:29and her brothers and sisters all live far away
25:35She’s lived here for over twenty years
25:39but she still speaks with her hometown accent
25:44Sometimes people can’t understand her
25:47and she has to repeat herself over and over
25:52When she gets tired of explaining
25:55she just stays quiet
25:58That makes some people think she’s hard to get along with
26:09She doesn’t have many close friends
26:12mostly just acquaintances she greets on the road
26:18She always says blood ties are the most reliable bond
26:25Take my aunt, for example
26:28Thousands of miles apart
26:31she still sends Mom packages
26:35Sometimes the shipping costs more than the things inside
26:46Every time one arrives
26:48Mom takes everything out and looks through it slowly
26:53happy for days
27:00She never cares how much the items cost
27:04What matters is knowing someone far away is thinking of her
27:31Because Mom leans on me so much
27:35it feels like I’ve never lived only for myself
27:41When I was eleven
27:43before she married my stepdad
27:46Mom went through betrayal in a relationship
27:52At her lowest point
27:54she looked at me with teary eyes and said:
27:59you’re my only hope
28:07I was too young then to grasp how heavy those words were
28:14I just knew they felt like a weight I couldn’t carry
28:20As I grew up
28:22I finally understood
28:27For her, stuck in that dark time
28:30I was everything she had
28:36Later she married my stepdad and had a husband beside her
28:44But in the end
28:45it still felt like only her birth daughter — me — gave her a sense of worth in this family
28:57I work hard and try to live well
29:00Part of it is for me
29:02Part of it is also to prove her worth
29:09Lots of people ask what I’m saving money for
29:14I said in an earlier video that it’s for my future and my parents’ future
29:22“Future” sounds vague
29:24but to me it’s very specific
29:33I’m getting older
29:34I don’t know how long I can keep up with the fast
29:39high-pressure life in Shenzhen
29:43I’ve always planned that I might head back home any time
29:49My biggest goal for saving is to buy a house
29:58I want a modest second-hand apartment in the city near my hometown
30:05Nothing fancy
30:06just safe and comfortable
30:10Someday I’d move my parents there with me
30:15I’d find a job close by
30:18It would probably pay less than Shenzhen
30:23but it would be steady
30:25I could look after them easily
30:31Mom has a chronic illness and needs regular checkups and medicine
30:40Medical care in the countryside is limited
30:44Many tests can only be done at city hospitals
30:49and most are only available in the morning
30:54To get treatment
30:56she often has to get up at three in the morning
31:02take multiple buses
31:04and spend four or five hours traveling
31:08After seeing the doctor and picking up her medicine
31:13she spends the whole day traveling back
31:17The whole day gets eaten up by the trip
31:23If she fell ill and couldn’t get out of bed alone at home
31:30there’d be no one to take care of her
31:33not even make her a hot meal
31:37Grandma lives next door
31:40but she’s older and sickly too
31:44They can’t look after each other
31:49I’m thousands of miles away in Shenzhen
31:51helpless to do anything
31:55Living in the city would change that
31:59If she’s unwell and doesn’t want to cook
32:04food can be delivered right to the door
32:08She can get help fast in an emergency
32:15There are more opportunities there too
32:19Even a simple
32:20easy job could help her feel useful
32:23like she still has a place in the world
32:34Once my parents are gone
32:37I’ll sell that apartment
32:39leave my hometown
32:41and settle in a quiet small town with beautiful scenery and a slow pace
32:58I’ll live out the rest of my life peacefully
33:02on my own terms
33:11I rarely talk about these private family worries out loud
33:20I didn’t plan to lay bare these messy
33:24honest parts of my life
33:28But I want to record sincerely
33:32No pretending
33:34no polishing things up
33:36I want to face my ordinariness openly
34:13<i>—Mom, what are we having for dinner?</i>
34:20<i>—Just throw something together.</i>
34:22<i>I just wanted to lie on the sofa and wait for you to feed me.</i>
34:26<i>—What’s this?</i>
34:28<i>—A cake I bought for myself.</i>
34:30<i>—I thought you said you’d eat leftovers?</i>
34:32<i>—You bought this for yourself?</i>
34:33<i>—Yeah.</i>
34:35<i>—I get it to celebrate my birthday from last month..</i>
34:38<i>—Let me see it.</i>
35:22<i>—Mom, you really understand the meaning of rituals. </i>
35:26<i>I made a really ugly cake for my birthday, </i>
35:29<i>but look how beautiful yours is.</i>
35:45<i>—Because I’m happy.</i>
36:02I’m GuYi
36:04Thank you for staying with me through this video.
36:07Thanks for bearing the ads placed in it.
36:11A special thank-you also goes to everyone who has joined my channel membership
36:19even though I haven’t posted any member-exclusive content up to this day
36:28And thank you to everyone who tipped me or bought me a coffee
36:35Your kindness is what keeps this channel breathing.

About this transcript

This page contains the full transcript of Shocked? Confused? Why I Hid This Channel From My Family — Until Now | Being a Chinese Youtuber by GuYi Alone, generated from the public captions YouTube serves with the video. The transcript has 2,883 words across 415 segments, with the original timestamps preserved so you can click any line to jump to that moment in the embedded player.

What you can do with it

Use the transcript to take notes, quote the speaker, build a study guide, generate a summary with ChatGPT or Claude via the YouTube Summary tool, or export it as a timed subtitle file with YouTube to SRT. You can also re-open it in the transcriber to choose a caption track available on the video.

Free YouTube transcript tool

YouTube2Text is a free YouTube transcript generator — no signup, no daily limit. Paste any YouTube link and get the full transcript instantly, with timestamps, click-to-jump, caption language selection, AI prompts for ChatGPT, Claude, and Gemini, and exports to TXT, SRT, VTT, or Markdown.