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She Lured Her Husband Into a Deadly Trap | Kathryn Restelli Interrogation — Transcript

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0:00Okay, for a minute, and then he would he
0:02would
0:03go back to something and be like, well,
0:05I'm mad about this. And why why did you
0:07take my kids out to
0:09Utah?
0:14>> On the night of July 12th, 2024,
0:1742-year-old Matthew Restelli arrived in
0:19American Fork, Utah, after driving
0:21hundreds of miles from Temecula, [music]
0:22California. His estranged wife,
0:25Catherine, and their three children were
0:27staying with members of her family,
0:28[music]
0:29as the couple's marriage had reached a
0:31breaking point. Shortly after Matthew
0:33entered the home, a burst of gunfire
0:35shattered the night.
0:37A nearby neighbor heard the shots and
0:38immediately called 911. When officers
0:41arrived, [music] they found Matthew
0:43inside the residence suffering from
0:44multiple gunshot wounds. Despite
0:47attempts to save [music] him, he died at
0:48the scene.
0:50Catherine had been inside the home when
0:51the shooting occurred. Now,
0:53investigators needed to understand why
0:55[music] Matthew had traveled all the way
0:56to Utah. What had happened between the
0:58couple in the days leading up to his
1:00arrival, and [music] exactly what
1:02Catherine had seen or heard from inside
1:04the house?
1:05With her husband dead, several family
1:07members present, and detectives only
1:09beginning to piece together what had
1:10happened,
1:11>> [music]
1:11>> Catherine was brought in to provide her
1:13account of the night.
1:14Now, investigators sit down with her to
1:17learn what led to Matthew Restelli's
1:18death.
1:19>> [music]
1:19>> This is the interrogation of Catherine
1:21Restelli.
1:22>> He tried to grab me.
1:25>> He tried to
1:27>> That's too dark.
1:29>> Yeah,
1:30it's dark.
1:31>> I want to look at the video.
1:34>> You want to talk about that? You got a
1:35better
1:36>> Do you want some water now?
1:37>> me to sit in here, or do you want me to
1:39It's up to you.
1:40>> I
1:41It is It is
1:42He's an opportunist, so if he's left
1:45alone, he's going to find a way to
1:47torture
1:48>> the little kitchen?
1:49>> Yeah, it's
1:50>> It's That's perfect.
1:51>> Like my dad, too. So, he
1:54He can sell on the phone, too.
1:58And then the way he Yeah.
2:00>> Absolutely.
2:02>> Call me if there's a
2:02>> Mark Hell. Mark. Yeah. So, I'm Mark
2:04Hell. And then, do you prefer Catherine?
2:06I know that we just asked you that.
2:08>> I go by Kate.
2:09>> Okay. How do you spell your last name?
2:10>> K A T E
2:12>> Okay.
2:13Okay.
2:14And then, what is your last name? Kate?
2:17>> Whistle. All right.
2:18Yes. T E L L O W E
2:22>> Okay. What's your birth
2:23>> It's like
2:24>> You're visiting from out of town. Is
2:25that right?
2:26Okay. And are you You're from
2:28California? Is that right? What's your
2:30home address?
2:31>> It is.
2:33>> Is that neat?
2:34>> Yeah.
2:36Yes. That is actually really cool. Huh?
2:40>> [snorts]
2:40>> It was meant to be.
2:41>> Right?
2:42>> Just for you.
2:42>> I love serendipitous things.
2:44>> And have you had that phone number for a
2:45while then?
2:47>> Um
2:48>> When did you get it?
2:49>> it for a couple years.
2:50>> A couple years?
2:50>> years. It's not It's not something that
2:51I've had forever. I love I'm I will
2:54throw away phone numbers.
2:55>> Yeah.
2:55>> Like my old one was going to be one.
2:57But, this one I might
2:58>> We might want to keep this one for a
2:59little bit.
2:59>> Maybe a little bit.
3:00>> Yeah, maybe.
3:00>> Maybe.
3:01>> It's Yeah, it's meant to be. It's got
3:02your birthday in it. That is pretty
3:04neat.
3:04>> Yeah.
3:05>> Um
3:06Okay. So, you're visiting here from
3:08California. Tell me a little bit about
3:11you, about the kiddos, about your story,
3:15how long you've been visiting.
3:16>> We've been out here for about 3 weeks.
3:18>> Okay.
3:19>> Hanging out. Summer vacation.
3:21>> Okay.
3:21>> Um
3:23I came out here to get away from that.
3:26Because he's been verbally abusive
3:29lately and just
3:31just hard to deal with. And it was
3:35I needed a breather because
3:39I was hating going to sleep and I was
3:41hating waking up. I said, "I can't do
3:44that. I have babies and I need to be
3:45happier for them."
3:47And so, I said, "I need a breather. I'm
3:48going to go out to her mom's house."
3:51She's like, "Be fine. Whatever."
3:52And so, we went out and he came out He
3:56was supposed to come out today to have a
3:57conversation with me.
3:59And to figure things out and to work
4:01things out.
4:02>> Okay.
4:03>> figure out our next plan.
4:05Whether it's divorce or I'm staying here
4:09longer or I'm going home with him. It
4:13was like He was supposed to come out
4:14here and have a conversation.
4:15>> Okay.
4:17>> He just
4:19I guess the drive made him angry.
4:23Like he was mad that he was coming out.
4:25Mad that he was
4:26having to make the drive.
4:30>> Okay.
4:32How do you Why do you think that? Like
4:34How do you know that?
4:36>> Cuz he was He was yelling at me on the
4:38phone as he's coming out. He was like
4:40getting angry that he was making the
4:42drive. He was telling me, "Why am I
4:43making this drive?"
4:44>> Like on a phone call?
4:45>> Yeah. Cuz I was talking to him on the
4:46phone and he was saying that
4:48>> Okay.
4:50So, you were on the phone with him for
4:51several hours or just
4:52>> No, no, no, no, no. Like 10 minutes
4:54here, 10 minutes there, 10 minutes here.
4:56Like just like little bits. And like I
4:58would There's It gets to the point where
4:59I said, "Matt, I'm not going to talk
5:01with you anymore because you're being
5:03mean and I don't want to talk to you.
5:04Like if you can calm down and you can
5:05I'll call you back."
5:07And it's a constant thing with him. And
5:10And that's why
5:11>> Hold on for just a moment.
5:14>> You don't have anything further.
5:16>> Okay.
5:16>> Sounds good.
5:17>> So, I assume you'll call the county
5:19attorney and let us know.
5:20>> Yeah.
5:21>> Okay. That's our next Slow next go
5:22around. Yeah.
5:23>> We'll sit and wait.
5:25>> Okay.
5:25>> Sounds good.
5:26>> Yep.
5:27>> I'm not allowed to go smoke my cigarette
5:28in the hall.
5:29>> I doubt it, but I'll ask.
5:31>> Not at this time. No.
5:33>> He just tried to calm my nerves.
5:35>> Yeah, just so I understand.
5:36>> No.
5:37>> We did not have a cigarette in the hall.
5:39>> Okay.
5:39>> I thank you. Yep.
5:44>> Sorry.
5:45>> Um, I'm fine. I get it.
5:47>> So, he was super angry
5:49throughout his drive. You talked to him
5:51for 10 or so minutes here and there.
5:53>> He wasn't angry the whole time. He went
5:54like in spurts. Like he was okay for a
5:57minute and then he would he would
5:59go back to something and be like, "Well,
6:01I'm mad about this." And "Why Why did
6:03you take my kids out to
6:05Utah?" Like he's mad that I was out
6:07here, even though he agreed to it.
6:11>> Okay.
6:13So he just kind of went back and forth
6:14with these phone calls throughout his
6:17journey.
6:17>> It wasn't It was only like four phone
6:19calls.
6:19>> Okay.
6:20>> It wasn't a constant thing cuz it's
6:22like, "Come out here and make the
6:23drive." Like it's it's a rough trip. He
6:25didn't even have a cell phone charger.
6:27>> Oh.
6:28>> So I was like, "You don't want to stop
6:29and buy one?" He was like, "No, I don't
6:30want to."
6:32Like, "No, when I get there you're going
6:34to you're going to bring your cell phone
6:36charger and I'm going to use your cell
6:37phone charger."
6:40>> Did he tell you that?
6:41>> Yeah.
6:41>> Okay.
6:42>> Yeah, cuz I asked him. I said, "Why
6:43don't you want to buy a cell phone
6:44charger?" And he said, "Because I'm just
6:46going to use your cell phone charger
6:47when
6:48I see you."
6:50So cuz he had his phone off from like um
6:53Vegas to Provo or whatever. So it was it
6:55was a good chunk of of time where I
6:57didn't talk to him.
6:58>> Okay. And when was the last time you
7:00talked to him?
7:04>> It was about 2 hours before I got there,
7:07maybe 2 and 1/2 hours.
7:09>> 2 and 1/2 hours? Okay.
7:13Um
7:15Did he tell you where he was at or
7:17anything or like what the plan was?
7:19>> He said he was by Cedar City and that he
7:21had gotten food in Beaver or whatever.
7:24Or it may have been
7:26They may have been two phone calls, but
7:27he was in Beaver and then he was
7:31in Cedar. No, cuz Cedar City's first and
7:34then it goes Beaver. So he's talking
7:35about
7:37how he was in Beaver and then somebody
7:39was rude to him
7:40at the Subway and then like they don't
7:42want to do their job. So he was like
7:43taking
7:45the fact that they were not doing their
7:47job
7:48like he was mad. Then he's like I guess
7:51the guy told him to get it on here
7:54whatever size you want like whatever
7:55damn size. I don't know.
7:57It was
7:58it was weird.
8:00>> Oh.
8:00>> It was weird that the that the employee
8:02was
8:05giving the other customer a hard time as
8:08Matt was watching and he was making Matt
8:11mad that he was watching us and he's
8:12like why is this going on? Like what's
8:14my luck? I'm like I didn't I didn't
8:16understand it.
8:17But he was getting irritated
8:20as he was making the drive.
8:21>> Okay.
8:23And was that in Beaver or Cedar City?
8:25>> Beaver that he had the issue.
8:27>> That was Beaver Subway?
8:30>> I believe so.
8:33>> And he called you after that happened
8:35after he got his food and stuff?
8:37>> cuz he had asked me so I remember now
8:39cuz he asked me at Cedar City he was
8:40like what's around your mom's house to
8:42eat? I said you're going to have to
8:45find something sooner because there's
8:47not a whole lot of food around here you
8:49need to eat.
8:50Um so he stopped in Beaver and got
8:53Subway.
8:54>> Okay.
8:55>> And that's when he was like these people
8:56are [ __ ] dumb.
8:58>> Okay. Yeah.
8:59>> he was mad. Like I guess they don't they
9:01don't know how to do anything.
9:02>> Okay.
9:04So he was mad about that and you talked
9:06to him then so like 2 and 1/2 hours
9:09prior and then
9:09>> Probably about 8:00 so I talked to him.
9:12>> About 8:00 p.m.?
9:13>> Mhm.
9:13>> Okay.
9:15Um and what else was that phone call
9:17like?
9:19>> It was a short phone call because he was
9:20so irritated and I was like just get
9:22back on the road and we'll see you when
9:24you get here. I kind of just let him you
9:26know you're going to be angry just
9:28be angry by yourself.
9:30>> Okay. Yeah.
9:31>> to you when you get here and hopefully
9:32your food will hit your tummy and you
9:33won't be hangry anymore.
9:34>> That makes sense. That makes sense.
9:37Um
9:38>> Excuse me. One shouldn't have a
9:40Oh my god.
9:42No, it's on.
9:43It's on. Those doors are deceiving,
9:46though. They look off, but they're all
9:47on.
9:48Um
9:49>> Oh god.
9:52>> He has lots to get himself.
9:54He's so awesome. So
9:56But if you wanted to peek in, take a
9:58break.
9:59>> No, I wanted to I wanted to see if he
10:01has a problem. I think he would open the
10:03door.
10:03>> He'll pop out. Yeah. He'll pop out. Um
10:10So, kind of irritated about this whole
10:12subway thing. You talked to him and then
10:15you said I'll just talk to you when you
10:16get
10:17here. You were hoping that he would be
10:19as angry or mad about whatever he was
10:21pissed at, right? Um
10:24Did you make a plan of like
10:27was he going to stay at your mom's
10:29house? Is he
10:30>> part of that's part of what we were
10:31going to figure out if we were going to
10:33if he felt well enough to drive home at
10:36the moment, if he wanted to hang out and
10:38stay the night, whatever he wanted to
10:41do. It was It was all in his
10:44It's all his call.
10:45>> Okay.
10:46>> So, if he wanted to stay, he could stay.
10:48If he wanted us to drive home, we would
10:50drive home.
10:51>> Okay.
10:51>> want to drive home. I was really
10:53not something that I wanted to do.
10:57But if that's what he wanted to do, then
10:59that's what I was ready to do.
11:00>> Okay, with the kiddos.
11:02>> Oh, absolutely. Yeah.
11:03>> Yeah, your whole little family. Okay.
11:04Okay.
11:05Um
11:08Okay, so you guys were just going to
11:09figure out figure that out when he got
11:11there. And then do you know about what
11:12time he was like I don't know if he put
11:14it in maps cuz his phone was turned off,
11:16but like what was his expected time
11:18estimated time of arrival?
11:20>> Something like 10:15.
11:21>> About 10:15. Okay.
11:24Um
11:25And had you talked to him at all between
11:278:00 and 10:15?
11:29>> Nope.
11:29>> No.
11:30>> No, he'd been totally quiet. He said
11:32I'll see you at the meeting.
11:33At 10:10 and he pulled up at 10:15.
11:36>> Okay.
11:37Um, and then what what happened from
11:40there?
11:42>> Um,
11:44I heard some commotion downstairs like
11:46yelling. I couldn't tell whose voice was
11:48what.
11:48>> Okay.
11:49>> And then
11:50I heard
11:52shots and I
11:54couldn't go downstairs and my mom came
11:56came upstairs and she said
11:58there's been a situation. Stay upstairs
12:00with the babies and I'm going to call
12:02911 and she she didn't tell me anything.
12:05>> Okay.
12:06>> I think she was trying to protect me on
12:08the fact that my husband had just been
12:09shot.
12:10And
12:16I just didn't know what
12:18just
12:18crying listening to my mom
12:23just on the phone.
12:25Like
12:27I don't know.
12:29>> Okay.
12:30>> So it gets kind of
12:33interesting. Like I don't know
12:36I don't know what happened.
12:38>> Okay.
12:40So you were upstairs in the room with
12:43your babies. Your mom
12:44>> shut.
12:44>> Your mom said, "I'm going to call 911."
12:47>> Mhm.
12:47>> Did she
12:49>> I don't know what she did. She went back
12:51downstairs.
12:52>> Oh, she
12:52>> me not to come downstairs.
12:54>> Okay, my mistake. I thought she stayed
12:55with you while you were on
12:56>> she went downstairs. She went back
12:58downstairs.
12:58>> Okay, so she went out
12:59>> know if she was doing I don't know if
13:00she was doing CPR. I don't know what she
13:02was doing.
13:02>> Okay.
13:03>> I don't know what she was doing.
13:04She just said something happened. You
13:06need to stay up here.
13:07>> Okay.
13:07>> I said, "Okay. I'm going to stay with my
13:09babies."
13:09>> Yeah.
13:10>> And that's where I was when the officers
13:12came in and they said, "American Fork
13:15PD." And that's when I left my phone on
13:16the
13:18the bed and I came down and
13:21I saw him at the bottom of the stairs.
13:23>> Okay. And then what did you do?
13:26>> He was dead.
13:27He was
13:29on the floor. I was
13:31I was being escorted out by officers.
13:33>> Okay.
13:33>> I was I didn't go downstairs
13:37until officers came up and got
13:39I said because I they said come down
13:41with your hands up. And I so I
13:43hands up like I'm coming down slowly. I
13:45have earbuds in my pocket like
13:47>> Okay. Yeah.
13:49>> Yeah.
13:51Um
13:53and then you know it's just the
13:55upstairs.
13:56>> They were asleep.
13:56>> Right.
13:56>> They were asleep. They stayed asleep.
13:59They didn't budge.
14:02They stayed asleep the whole time.
14:03>> Okay.
14:04>> Until we woke up.
14:06>> Was So I'm going to go back just a
14:08little bit. Um
14:10was Matt texting you at all?
14:12>> No.
14:13>> Like he was
14:14>> No, he was conserving his phone battery.
14:16And
14:17>> Okay.
14:17>> he's not a texter. Like when he drives.
14:19>> Okay, gotcha.
14:21>> So
14:21>> I just didn't know if he was doing voice
14:22text or whatever.
14:24>> Nope.
14:24>> Um
14:25>> pretty radio silent.
14:27>> Okay. And you think he called you out
14:28four times?
14:30>> Maybe.
14:31>> Okay.
14:31>> Maybe.
14:32I have um I have his ringtone set to
14:35silent. So I often miss his phone calls.
14:39Cuz I don't always want to have to
14:40answer it.
14:42>> Okay.
14:42>> Cuz he's not always nice.
14:45>> So it sounds like I mean this has been a
14:47long time.
14:48>> why I came out here. I came out here for
14:49a breather because I didn't know if I
14:51wanted a divorce or if I wanted to work
14:55it out. Like we've had a lot of bumpy
14:58times in the last year.
15:00>> Okay.
15:01>> And it's just
15:04he he makes me crow.
15:07I've apologized for my mistakes. I've
15:09acknowledged my mistakes.
15:11And he just
15:13makes me eat crow breakfast, lunch, and
15:15dinner. And I'm like I try
15:17I tried to
15:19make it better. I tried to
15:24work past it. I tried to show him that I
15:27am willing to work on this marriage and
15:29to do this. And no matter what I did, he
15:31was always constantly yelling at me. And
15:33I said, "I can't do this on a daily
15:35basis. I'm going to my mom's."
15:37And that's when I went to my mom's for
15:39the week for the
15:41extended vacation. I don't know what you
15:43want to
15:44call it. School doesn't start until
15:46August. So, we're we're on summer
15:48vacation out here in gorgeous Utah.
15:50>> Yeah. Okay.
15:52Cuz Temecula is pretty dry, isn't it?
15:54>> Temecula got up to like 120. Like it is
15:58full flipping hot out there.
16:00>> Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:01Yeah, I'm not originally from here. I'm
16:03from Las Vegas, so I understand the 120
16:05degree
16:05>> Oh, yeah. Yeah.
16:07>> Oh, yeah. That's a whole 'nother heat.
16:09That's a whole 'nother heat. Like you
16:10were
16:12You came out to the right state.
16:13>> Yeah, yeah, it's like a hot blow dryer
16:16to the face.
16:17They're windy there, too. So, yeah. In
16:19Temecula because it's really dry, isn't
16:21it? Like desert-y?
16:22>> It's more desert-y, yeah.
16:23>> Temecula? Okay. I've only ever heard of
16:25Jordan Grove, so I want to like visit
16:27it.
16:28>> It's pretty out there. It's so
16:29>> Isn't it? Okay.
16:30>> wine country. I don't know if you drink
16:32wine.
16:32>> I mean
16:34>> I know where we are.
16:36>> No, no. I get it. Yeah, yeah.
16:39Give me every now and then.
16:41Um
16:41>> Yeah, I quit drinking back in January.
16:44>> Did you?
16:45>> Mhm. Yeah.
16:46>> They're They're just
16:48>> So, I got sick. And I think I had
16:50pneumonia and it was just something that
16:52I was like I didn't I didn't realize it
16:55was pneumonia till after the fact. But,
16:57it was just something like
16:59I was like, "Oh, maybe I'll have a
17:00drink." And I took a drink and I was
17:01like, "This is blah. This is terrible."
17:04Like it was already like 2 and 1/2
17:06weeks, 3 weeks of not drinking and I
17:08just kept it up. And it was just
17:10beautiful.
17:11>> Okay.
17:12>> Yeah.
17:13And my husband, he was like, "Why don't
17:14you want to drink? Why don't you want to
17:15drink? Why don't you want to drink?"
17:16It's like, "Cuz I'm over it.
17:18>> Yeah.
17:18>> I'm over it. And he should be too. And
17:20he actually quit drinking um
17:23a couple days after we left.
17:25>> Okay.
17:27>> So that So
17:29what do you say? Allegedly he's been
17:31sober since
17:31>> Allegedly sure. Yeah.
17:33>> Cuz I can't I don't know what he's
17:34doing.
17:35For reals. I know he's not sober. I know
17:37he smokes weed.
17:39>> Okay.
17:43Is that the only like substance he uses
17:46or do you know if he uses anything else?
17:48>> I don't think so. Just weed and
17:51what was beer. But
17:52>> Weed and beer. Okay.
17:54And does he usually smoke weed or
17:57gummies edibles?
17:58>> Um edibles but I think since I've been
18:01gone it's just been flower.
18:02>> Okay.
18:03>> Cuz I would go to the dispensary and
18:04pick up all the stuff and
18:07he would just
18:09>> Indulge.
18:10Okay.
18:11>> So
18:12>> Do you feel like it was like excessive
18:14or was it I just tell me about that.
18:17>> It was definitely excessive. There were
18:18many times where 7:59 he'd crack open a
18:22beer.
18:22>> In the morning?
18:23>> Mhm.
18:23>> Oh. Okay.
18:25>> Yep.
18:26It was it was really bad. It was it was
18:29really really bad. He was definitely an
18:30alcoholic.
18:32And I think when I left and he realized
18:36wow my wife wants nothing to do with me
18:38because of my drinking
18:40he's like I quit drinking. I'm doing so
18:43much better and
18:44so clear-headed and
18:46all that stuff.
18:47>> Okay.
18:49How long had that been what you would
18:51consider an issue like
18:52>> Our entire marriage.
18:54>> And how long have you all been married?
18:55>> 7 and 1/2 years so.
18:58>> Okay.
18:58>> November 20th 2016.
19:05>> November 20th?
19:06>> Mhm.
19:07>> 2016?
19:08>> Mhm.
19:08>> 7 and 1/2 years that's a long Long
19:10>> It is a long time.
19:13Very long time.
19:15>> Okay, and how did y'all meet?
19:17>> At a grocery store.
19:18>> Met him at the grocery store?
19:19>> I was working at Ralph's. I was a door
19:22greeter and but I had also worked in the
19:25service deli.
19:26>> Okay.
19:26>> And his his son he's got a 20-year-old
19:29son. Um
19:35>> [sighs]
19:37>> I met Lucas when he was four.
19:40And it was one of the pickup lines. I
19:42said, "Hey, you've got a monkey on your
19:43cart."
19:45And so I met Lucas and Matt at the same
19:47time at the grocery store. And Matt had
19:49been in a couple of times and
19:53he
19:54just one time he was had me on the door
19:57and he was like, "Hi, I was just
19:57wondering if I could get your number."
20:00Mhm.
20:01>> Got my number.
20:02Um it was a rocky, rocky relationship
20:05from day one.
20:06>> Really?
20:07>> But I was young and dumb.
20:09Um
20:13If I swear if social media was the way
20:16it was
20:1715 years ago,
20:19I would have a totally different
20:20partner.
20:21>> Really?
20:22>> Absolutely. Absolutely. The knowledge of
20:26what abuse is
20:29>> Mhm.
20:29>> Like it wasn't out there.
20:32Fact that
20:33>> Yeah.
20:33>> It's like, "Oh, just deal with it. Just
20:34be with the dude." Because like for how
20:36long have women not been able to do
20:38stuff without dudes?
20:40Like what, 1976 is when women were
20:43able to get their own bank account by
20:44themselves? So it's like we're like
20:46trained to rely on them.
20:50And it's like he
20:53he I felt like he knew that I could be
20:55easily manipulated when I was 20.
20:58But
21:02I was dumb.
21:04I stuck with him.
21:06>> So tell me you said that since day one
21:08it's been a rocky relationship. Kind of
21:10tell me about that.
21:11>> He never introduced me to his family. It
21:13was just off and on all the time. Like
21:19different kinds of
21:22together for a month and not together
21:24and then it was
21:25I don't know.
21:27There was an issue with cheating where
21:28he was talking to somebody else and she
21:30was like
21:31saying I love you on his voicemail. I
21:33was like, "What the fuck?" But then she
21:35was like, "You can have him." I should
21:36have left him then and I didn't.
21:39>> How long ago was that?
21:41>> It's fine. That was before we were
21:42married. That was before we were
21:44married.
21:47That's like 12 years and
21:49it was a long time ago.
21:51>> Okay, so that was like 12 years ago.
21:52>> got married, so I don't even think it
21:54counts.
21:59It's just
22:01we've always had ups and downs in our
22:02relationship.
22:05And I feel like
22:07maybe the first 5 years of our marriage
22:09it was good and then he had some tax
22:12issues where he was dealing with an
22:14audit [clears throat]
22:15where
22:17he was trying to open a feed store and
22:20it got classified as a hobby loss.
22:24And so all this work that he had put
22:27into
22:30the business,
22:32the IRS said, "Hey, you can't do that.
22:35You're losing too much money."
22:38And so he got an audit and wasn't able
22:41to finish the feed store and it was a
22:44hit to his ego and
22:49he never recovered from it, I feel like,
22:52and then cuz COVID happened and like
22:54people
22:56people in California, if you don't have
22:57a job and if you're not like have your
23:00clientele set up in your
23:03Excuse me, in your
23:04business, you're going to flop. Like,
23:06COVID ruined so many businesses.
23:08>> Yeah.
23:09>> And
23:10definitely him being a handyman
23:13was part of it.
23:16I could do that.
23:17>> That's
23:18>> Uh-uh.
23:19>> You're You can totally
23:21You can do whatever you need to.
23:24>> This is the worst when it like when it's
23:26stuck in your chest and it just sits
23:27there and like it's open.
23:30>> Well, it's like uh it's like I'm like,
23:32"Palpitations?"
23:34>> I hope not.
23:36>> Hope not. I know. I know.
23:39This is Oh god.
23:42>> So,
23:43the last You said the first 5 years of
23:46marriage were pretty good.
23:48And then the last
23:50>> The last two, I feel like because of the
23:53IRS thing, it just kind of got rocky.
23:55>> Yeah.
23:56>> And
23:59it's just We just grew apart and it was
24:02constant fighting.
24:04Anything that went awry, it was always
24:06my fault.
24:11Like, our trucks
24:13have been breaking down
24:15and he was like, "It's your
24:17because you used them inappropriately."
24:21>> What does that mean?
24:22>> I don't know what it means.
24:25I don't know what it means. And that's
24:27the kind of psychological [ __ ] I had
24:30to deal with. Like, you're going to tell
24:32me my trucks are broken because I used
24:34the trucks inappropriately
24:36and it's my karma
24:40because I drive to a dispensary
24:43in California?
24:44>> For him?
24:45>> Well, for us.
24:46>> For both of you?
24:47>> For both of us.
24:51>> That's so interesting.
24:53>> I don't know what this stuff is.
24:57I'm not a cycle. I'm not
24:59I can't analyze him, but I've been with
25:01him long enough and I've seen enough
25:04Tik Toks to understand
25:07>> Yeah.
25:07>> what a narcissist does and just the way
25:09that
25:12he'll just be so mean just for nothing
25:14and then like
25:16be bipolar and be like, "Oh, sorry. I
25:18didn't mean it."
25:22>> So you said that you guys would fight a
25:23lot. What does that What does that look
25:25like?
25:26Or what did that look like?
25:28>> A lot of him yelling at me and me just
25:31trying to be like, "Okay, I'm sorry.
25:32Okay, I'm sorry. Okay, I'm sorry." And
25:35then like, "Can we not do this in front
25:37of the kids, please?" Like
25:40I tried to keep a journal
25:43of
25:45things that he would say to me and the
25:47fights that we would have and when we
25:50would have sex cuz I didn't want to have
25:53sex, but it was always
25:55if I didn't have sex with him, then my
25:57day was going to be hell.
25:59I would pay severely for it.
26:02Everything is a lie and like he can't
26:04get his day started because he hasn't
26:06had sex.
26:11And that was part of the reason why I
26:13was like, "I can't. I need I need to go
26:15to my mom's. I need to figure
26:17I need to be
26:20clear-headed and not yelled at every
26:22single day and I need to figure out if I
26:25want to be yelled at every single day or
26:27if I want to be away and
26:30focusing and
26:32and I tried to call I talked to a lawyer
26:36about
26:37possible divorce. I talked to a lawyer
26:39yesterday. I had a consultation with
26:42them and trying to figure out
26:47what steps I can take to
26:54to make things work
26:57and to keep everybody happy.
26:59>> Mhm.
27:02>> And
27:05it's
27:11it's it's a matter of going back to
27:13California and filing there
27:16when I get home from vacation.
27:20>> So, that was your plan as of yesterday.
27:23>> Yeah, that's what I was going to talk to
27:24Matt about doing was like I said
27:26divorce, a longer I stay out here
27:29longer, or
27:32we work it out.
27:34It's only three options.
27:37>> Mhm.
27:38>> And
27:40I don't want my children to be treating
27:43me like [ __ ] because that's how their
27:45dad treats me. Like, my son yells at me
27:47all the time because
27:49my husband yells at me. Like, there's
27:51been points where he's we were at home
27:55and I was like, "I'm done talking with
27:56you." And I went to the bedroom and I
27:59closed the door and he just stands at
28:01the bedroom door yelling at me, "Open
28:02the door. You need to come out. I want
28:05to have a conversation with you." And I
28:06said, "No, I don't want to do that. I
28:08don't
28:10I want you to calm down and then once
28:12you're calm, then we can have a
28:13conversation, but not until you're calm.
28:16Like,
28:17give me a time. Do you want 10 minutes?
28:20Can I have an hour? Like, no, I'm not
28:22going to make you wait overnight because
28:23that's not fair.
28:25So,
28:27give me an hour. Calm down and come back
28:30to me. Maybe Maybe have some herbal tea
28:31or milk. And then come back to me and
28:33talk to me.
28:34>> Mhm.
28:35>> But, let me calm down. Let you need to
28:37calm down.
28:39He would just I would literally have to
28:41hold the door shut. Like, hold the the
28:44lock to where he couldn't twist it.
28:48>> Okay.
28:50And that was pretty consistent.
28:53>> Very consistent.
28:54>> Okay.
28:54>> Very consistent.
28:55>> How often would that happen?
28:57>> At least twice a month.
28:59>> Twice a month?
28:59>> a a like a big fight like that.
29:01>> Okay.
29:04>> He there was um a point where we were
29:08paying on our UPS
29:11mailbox and he called me. I was in the
29:13store, he's in the he's in the truck
29:15with the kids. He called me
29:18and he was like
29:20just ragging on me for
29:22for anything I've ever done wrong. Like
29:25it's so stupid.
29:26And I wish I wish I could have remember
29:28more, but my trauma response is like
29:31whoa,
29:32block it out, you don't get to remember
29:33it because it's that [ __ ] up.
29:35>> Mhm.
29:35>> So, I don't remember it. I think it was
29:37just telling me that
29:40I'm just a shitty person just for
29:43whatever reason. And
29:45I was like, whatever. And so I went
29:47outside and
29:49I got in the car and I locked him out of
29:51the car and I said, you need to calm
29:53down. And he was like, you're not going
29:55to leave me here. I said, no, but you
29:56need to calm down. He was like, give me
29:58my shoes and my keys. And so I rolled
30:00down the window and in the time that I
30:02rolled down the window, he reaches in
30:04the truck and rips the [ __ ] keys out
30:07of the ignition and walks away.
30:09And like strands and makes me stranded
30:11there. Like really, you're going to take
30:12the keys out of the ignition?
30:15Like
30:18I
30:19it's control.
30:20And he didn't want to have to walk home.
30:23>> How long ago was that, do you think?
30:25>> That was 2 weeks before I left.
30:29>> Okay.
30:29>> That was literally 2 weeks before I
30:31left. That was one of
30:33That was one of the things I was like, I
30:35can't do this. I'm I need a break. I
30:38need a breather. I need to be able to
30:39figure out if this marriage is what I
30:41want.
30:42Because it's a lot of abuse and I can't
30:45I can't do that to my kids. My kids My
30:48kids are so sweet.
30:51They don't
30:54>> Yeah, they didn't They don't They don't
30:56deserve that and neither do you.
31:01I mean, you guys have gone through so
31:03much.
31:05Right?
31:06>> It's a lot.
31:07It's a lot and it's
31:09it's just so sad.
31:15It's a lot to stand.
31:18He was scary.
31:20He was really I honestly I was scared. I
31:22didn't want him to come out, but I
31:24>> Really?
31:25>> He was going to come out.
31:28He was
31:29He's scary.
31:30>> I mean, what are you I mean, what do you
31:32think?
31:33>> Like I didn't know if he had his gun
31:34with him or not. Like I don't know if
31:36the gun's in the truck or not. We have
31:38plenty of guns at home.
31:40But I don't know if he would be stupid
31:41enough to bring it over to our state.
31:44You know what I mean?
31:45>> Sure. Yeah.
31:47>> Like
31:49a knife, maybe.
31:52But a gun, I don't know.
31:56I didn't
31:58I don't know what his plan is. You know?
32:04>> Do you think he's capable? I mean, like
32:07was he ever physically abusive to you or
32:10your children?
32:11>> He hit me, yes. He hit me once.
32:14And
32:15it's not something
32:18I'd put past him. Like
32:20the opportunity presents itself, like
32:23he's going to
32:25punch you if that's
32:26what he needs to do.
32:29I don't know.
32:30Depends on if he's drinking or sober.
32:32>> Yeah.
32:33Was that recent that he punched you?
32:36>> No. It was It was before we got married.
32:38So, it's
32:40a while ago.
32:41>> Okay. Cuz how long have you guys been
32:44>> 15 years.
32:45>> years together? So, about
32:47>> 2008.
32:48>> 2008.
32:48>> November 2008.
32:55>> And then it's been on and off since
32:57then. And then you all got married in
32:592016.
33:00>> Mhm.
33:01>> And that's when
33:01>> So,
33:02November No, December 20th, 2015, he
33:06proposed actually out here in Tree Fort
33:07underneath the Tree of Life
33:09during Christmas time. It was all pretty
33:11and twinkly and
33:13beautiful.
33:15We had a 11-month engagement, and that
33:18seemed to be fine. We
33:21managed to work through it nicely, and
33:23then
33:24>> Mhm.
33:25>> you know,
33:27got pregnant and
33:30got married and
33:33it seemed to be okay for a while.
33:37We did have
33:39a domestic
33:40dispute in Orange County. Um
33:44>> What happened there?
33:45>> It was 4 years ago. I was drinking,
33:48and it just got to the point where we
33:51were just arguing in front of the house
33:53and getting too loud.
33:55And we actually didn't Nobody touched
33:58each other,
33:59but the cops were called. And in
34:01California, it's a crime against
34:02California on a domestic dispute on a
34:05domestic dispute. So, somebody has to be
34:07taken to jail.
34:09I was the one who got taken to jail. I
34:10was arrested. Um
34:13they ordered me to do 10 weeks of anger
34:16management
34:17and to submit my DNA to Orange County,
34:21and the case would be dismissed in its
34:23entirety.
34:25I did I When I went to
34:28the court date, I had had 13 weeks of
34:32anger management class under my belt. I
34:34submitted my DNA to Orange County and
34:37they said case dismissed it in its
34:40entirety and it's completely gone.
34:43>> Mhm.
34:43>> And that's because it was
34:47it was
34:48between Matt and myself it was it was an
34:51equal thing where we were both at fault
34:53>> Mhm.
34:54>> and we were just arguing and it just
34:55escalated too far. But it's that kind of
34:59thing he holds over my head that you
35:02went to anger management classes and you
35:04had to do this and it's like but I'm
35:06growing from it and I'm learning from it
35:08and I'm
35:09>> Yeah.
35:10>> becoming a better person and I feel like
35:12he's upset because he's not becoming a
35:15better person.
35:16And like I gave him the same book
35:20with the
35:21anger management
35:23>> Mhm.
35:24>> and he says I don't need to read that
35:26because all I need is money. The only
35:30problem that makes people angry is
35:32money.
35:34>> Mhm.
35:35>> And that was his
35:37reasoning for not needing to read the
35:39book further and not needing to
35:42not yell
35:44cuz we didn't have money.
35:46He didn't want to go to work. He never
35:47went to work.
35:49He wanted me to go to work.
35:51>> And what do you do for work?
35:53>> I would do personal assisting where it's
35:56just like I had a friend who needed her
36:00vegetables cut and washed and put into
36:03bags and I would do that.
36:05>> Okay.
36:06>> Just random odd jobs running to Costco
36:08for her just
36:10just an extension of her just
36:13making making money and
36:17support our family.
36:21>> And then
36:21>> And we were we were on EBT.
36:24So it's like that's a
36:28it's a big thing, you know, like
36:30so many people can't get it because they
36:33make just over the amount and it's
36:37I'm thankful that I have food for my
36:39children.
36:39>> Mhm.
36:40>> In that aspect.
36:42>> Yeah.
36:42>> And because it was it was it was really
36:45bad where COVID was and my husband
36:47wasn't working and we were just like
36:50there was a point where I had to call my
36:52sister and say
36:54I need chicken nuggets. I need eggs.
36:56Like I need to feed my kids.
36:58>> Mhm.
36:58>> And she she did a Walmart order and he's
37:03that was like
37:04obviously 2020 and he still puts that in
37:07my face. Like oh well, you had to call
37:09your sister for groceries that one time
37:12and it's all stuff that just is
37:14constantly thrown in my face.
37:16>> Mhm.
37:16>> Like
37:17it's constantly his what I did wrong.
37:23>> And is that your sister that lives in
37:25Ogden?
37:26>> Yeah.
37:26>> Okay. So
37:27>> I have three brothers and three sisters.
37:29>> Oh, wow.
37:30>> So, yeah.
37:32>> That's a big
37:32family.
37:33>> that we
37:34started in Utah but no, we started in
37:36California.
37:36>> Really?
37:37>> Yeah.
37:38>> That's so funny. Okay. So, you called
37:41your sister in 2020 and which sister is
37:42that?
37:44>> What do you mean? What do you
37:45>> What's your sister's
37:45>> What did I What did I say?
37:46>> Um in 2020 she did a grocery order for
37:50you.
37:50>> Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that was my
37:51older sister who lived in Carlsbad.
37:54>> Oh. So, she lives in Cal the sister
37:57>> She lives in California, too. And so
37:59she's she was my support system out
38:01there and she was helping me with
38:04food and stuff.
38:05>> Yeah. What's that sister's name?
38:07>> Tara.
38:08>> Tara, is it t a r a?
38:09>> Mhm.
38:10>> Okay.
38:12What's her last name?
38:14>> Fisher. Uh spelled like school.
38:17>> Okay.
38:20All right. [snorts]
38:22Um
38:27Were there any sort of like verbal
38:29threats
38:30from that?
38:32I know that he was very degrading from
38:34what it sounds like from what you've
38:35shared.
38:38What would he say when he was yelling at
38:40you?
38:42>> Just making just
38:44just making me feel awful about who I
38:46am.
38:48>> I don't know if you're laughing at the
38:49dog.
38:49>> Yeah.
38:51>> Having fun?
38:52>> He just making me feel awful about who I
38:54was and
38:56the decisions that I've made in my life.
38:59Like
39:00anything. The
39:02the amount of weed I smoke, the amount
39:05of alcohol I don't drink.
39:07Like anything.
39:09Cuz like I asked him when he was
39:12when he was asking if I wanted to drink,
39:15I was like, "Why do you want me to drink
39:17so bad? Like did you put something in
39:18it?" And he was like, "How dare you
39:20accuse me of that? I'll drink it
39:21myself." I was like, "Okay, all right.
39:24You didn't put anything in it." So I
39:26don't
39:30It's just really scary. Just
39:34just so unpredictable like like being
39:37his wife.
39:39They they would tell me like street
39:41justice things and like, "Don't ever
39:43[ __ ] cross me cuz I'll get even." And
39:45it's like, "Are you telling that to me
39:47or you telling that to other people?"
39:49Cuz I'm a little scared. And like I
39:52like there were points where
39:55he was like, "I don't know if we can
39:56come back from this." And I'm like
39:57literally on [snorts] my hands on my on
40:00my knees [ __ ] begging him to stop
40:02yelling and
40:03nothing's working.
40:05Nothing. And it's like I just have to
40:07like
40:09grovel. I'm just
40:11bawling my eyes out and then like
40:15takes a
40:17ball and he's fine.
40:19Then he levels out. Then he's no longer
40:22pissed off.
40:24Could he just forget that I said that?
40:26Like just
40:27just let it evaporate. It doesn't
40:29matter. Like what?
40:32Like anything like
40:36When I left,
40:38I
40:41I got a rental car and I said, "Okay,
40:42the truck's the truck's down here at uh
40:46Rancho at Target.
40:48You just got to ride your bike to go get
40:49it."
40:50He lied to me and told me that the car
40:53was towed.
40:55And then
40:56he lied to me and told me that he had to
40:58ride down to the town
41:01when it was dark.
41:03And I know that he picked it up
41:05beforehand
41:08because I had had my friend, as he was
41:11pulling into our gate, drive by and then
41:14like, "Oh, that's him." And she's like,
41:16"Oh, I saw him."
41:19I was like, "Wait, Matt said he didn't
41:21have the truck. How did you see Matt if
41:22he didn't have the truck?"
41:24And I asked him about it last
41:27like a couple nights ago. He was like,
41:29"Well, I was just going to let it
41:30evaporate. I wasn't going to I wasn't
41:32going to say anything about it. I was
41:33just going to let it go.
41:35I was going to let it be. I lied for my
41:36kids."
41:39>> How's that for your kids? Yes.
41:41>> I don't know how it's for the kids.
41:42That's a good question. That's a good
41:44question.
41:45And a lot of the times when he would
41:46tell me things like that, I'm like,
41:48"Okay.
41:49Like I'm not going to argue it with you
41:50because I'm just arguing with a [ __ ]
41:52wall.
41:53>> Mhm.
41:53>> I'm not going to argue it. I can't. I
41:55don't have the energy. And I got to the
41:57point where
41:58when he would argue with me, I was I
42:01I had a friend tell me like, "You just
42:03need to act like you're defeated and
42:05that you don't have the energy because
42:08if you don't have the energy, then he
42:09doesn't want to fight with you." And I
42:11noticed that and I'm like, I'm I just
42:13can't I just like I you would just leave
42:15me alone and then he
42:18Mhm, but
42:22It's just crazy.
42:23I just don't get it.
42:29>> Was he ever really like physically
42:30violent or aggressive with other people?
42:33>> With my children. Like he would just
42:34grab them like
42:36grab their arm too fast or give them
42:38spanking was like just too aggressive
42:41with the way that he would
42:44pull them or grab them.
42:46Like I feel like he would do it to kids
42:48because they're children and they can't
42:50they can't fight back. They can't they
42:51can't walk.
42:52>> Yeah.
42:53>> You know.
42:53>> Defend themselves.
42:54>> No, they can't they can't and
42:57and that's why
42:58that's why I wanted to be out here. I
42:59want I wanted it to protect my babies. I
43:02wanted my kids to have a good summer. I
43:04wanted them to go swimming
43:07go to the awesome splash pad center so
43:10all over the place over here.
43:12I know it's just a fun Utah summer
43:14hanging out with Grammy.
43:16>> Yeah.
43:17>> That's it.
43:19I just want to be happy for the summer.
43:20I didn't want to have to be sad and just
43:24wondering what he's going to
43:26when he's going to yell at me next
43:28whether it's when in the middle of the
43:30night because he's
43:32horny and
43:35I'm not putting out enough.
43:37I I was I was constantly walking on
43:40eggshells.
43:42Constantly.
43:46>> Tell me about So you said do you
43:49remember what date you came out here to
43:51Utah?
43:52You said I know you said about 3 weeks
43:54ago. You've been here about 3 weeks.
43:58>> It was
44:00the day after Juneteenth.
44:02Because I felt like I was being freed.
44:11>> It's 2:20.
44:15>> Is when you drove out here?
44:17>> Yeah.
44:19Cuz
44:20it I remember it because
44:23Juneteenth is Emancipation Day, where
44:26all the slaves were free, and I swear to
44:28God, I was like, "Oh, look,
44:29I get to be free, too."
44:31>> Yeah.
44:32>> At least for
44:33a week, too, however long I get to be
44:36out here for.
44:37>> Yeah.
44:52>> [snorts]
44:53>> Do you want some tissues?
44:55>> Sure.
44:56>> Okay. Let me get some tissues. I'll be
44:57right back, okay?
45:00You okay?
45:14Do you think you'll be okay?
45:23>> Wait.
45:27What do you want? Something's wrong.
45:43You look exhausted.
45:51It was so good for baby girl.
45:54>> [snorts]
45:55>> What do you think?
46:01This just sucks.
46:06>> [laughter]
46:12>> It's sad.
46:13>> Yeah.
46:14>> It's so unfair.
46:25>> When you know what
46:26when you came out here
46:29did you share with your mom and siblings
46:32what had been going on or
46:33>> So, that's one of the reasons why I got
46:35out here was because it was so bad and I
46:38had called my mom and it was like, "Mom,
46:41I can't I can't be here right now. I
46:44need to get out. Like, I am wanting to
46:47off myself. Like,
46:49I
46:51I have kids
46:53and I can't wake up hating my life.
46:57Like, oh damn, I'm awake. That sucks.
47:00Like, that's not how it's supposed to be
47:02when you have kids. You're supposed to
47:03want to be around your kids and
47:07want to live life.
47:11But, with my mom
47:14it's
47:15she's like, "Let me rent you a car
47:18and you can drive out and it won't cost
47:19you any money cuz financial abuse was a
47:23huge thing. Like, we didn't have any
47:24money and that's
47:26and Matt knew that that that's I
47:28couldn't leave him because we didn't
47:30have money. And you need money to file
47:32for a divorce. You need money to live
47:34separately. And he knew what he was
47:37doing by not going to work. And so, we
47:40decided
47:42me and my mom, "Look,
47:45you don't have to pay any money for us
47:46to be out there. It's you can go to
47:49work." Like, he can he he did end up
47:52doing positive things while we were
47:54gone.
47:55And so, I don't understand why he was
47:57angry because he got a lot of positive
47:59things done.
48:02Like he sold water tanks. He
48:06He got
48:07He got the ball rolling on a lot of
48:09things and
48:16I just don't
48:17Like
48:19Why was he
48:21so angry?
48:23Like was he just
48:25mad because I was out here with the
48:26kids? And he was just mad that he had to
48:28drive out here?
48:31I just don't get it.
48:37>> So, when did you guys decide of
48:40that he was going to drive out here?
48:42>> Yesterday.
48:43When [snorts]
48:44I went over No, it wasn't yesterday. I
48:46don't know what today is. So,
48:49>> [snorts]
48:51>> So, he was supposed to come Friday.
48:54>> No. So, we didn't decide that he was
48:56coming until today when I went to go
48:59rent the car and I could not rent the
49:01car because
49:03my drive our state driver's license
49:05would not work with a debit card. You
49:08would have to have I know. You have to
49:09have a credit card with an out-of-state
49:12driver's license or be in the state that
49:15your license is in in order to rent a
49:18car. So, I couldn't rent a car. Like he
49:20was he had the reservation already to
49:22go. Like he didn't even ask me. He was
49:24like, "Oh, I've made the reservation for
49:25you. You pick it up tomorrow at 8:00."
49:27It's like, "Oh, okay. I didn't realize I
49:28was driving home." But yeah, sure.
49:30And then I went to go rent the car and
49:32it didn't work. I was like, "Do you want
49:33to come out and pick us up and have a
49:35conversation and see where this is going
49:37to go?"
49:38And he's like, "I don't know if the car
49:40is going to make it." Like cuz
49:43there's [snorts]
49:45He just put insurance on it. It has been
49:48out of insurance for
49:51like 2 years. I don't I don't think he
49:53paid registration on it, so it was like
49:55a gamble coming out here on whether or
49:57not he would make it or get pulled over.
49:59>> Okay.
50:00>> So, it's
50:04it's just interesting.
50:07I didn't think I didn't think he'd be so
50:09mad driving out.
50:11>> Mhm.
50:12>> So angry.
50:14>> And what kind of car were you referring
50:16to?
50:17>> The truck that was out front.
50:19>> Okay.
50:19>> The silver truck that was parked out
50:21front.
50:21>> The silver truck. Mhm. Okay.
50:23Um
50:24>> That's the vehicle. We have another
50:26truck that's in the shop in California.
50:29>> Okay.
50:30>> So
50:31>> Um
50:36I should be real.
50:38Do you feel like there's anything
50:41important that you want to share with
50:42me?
50:43Anything that you can think of?
50:46>> Off the top of my head, no. I
50:49>> Yeah.
50:50>> I feel like
50:53I explained enough. Like
50:57I have a lot of trauma responses and
51:01I block out a lot of things. Like
51:04conversations. Like you can ask me what
51:06I had a conversation with, but I'm like
51:09beats me. I have no freaking idea.
51:11I as a as a child I believe that my
51:15father
51:17molested me.
51:19And so it's like I'm just going to
51:21forget everything cuz I don't remember
51:23any bit of my childhood. None.
51:26>> Really?
51:27>> None.
51:27>> Mhm.
51:28>> Nothing.
51:30So, it's like oh
51:31what happened?
51:32>> Yeah.
51:33>> Like why don't you remember any of your
51:34childhood? And for the longest time I
51:35thought it was normal.
51:37That people didn't remember their
51:38childhood. My sister was like, you don't
51:40remember that? Like why would I remember
51:41that?
51:42>> Mhm.
51:43>> So, it's just my trauma response. It's
51:45just like whoop. Just wipe it out.
51:47>> Just
51:48like
51:48>> Just gone. And I think And I think
51:50that's part of the reason why I stayed
51:52with him as long as I did was because
51:55I forgot what time
51:58he did and that's I did start to keep a
52:00journal and
52:02on when he would yell at me, when he
52:04forced me to have sex with him.
52:06>> Yeah. Do you have that
52:07journal with you?
52:09>> Um the sex journal is with in my
52:12phone. It's in my secure folder.
52:15>> Okay.
52:15>> And I would just write it down
52:17time and
52:20Yeah, it's
52:22>> What about Did you keep a separate
52:23journal as well or it was just all in
52:25your locked?
52:26>> It's just all just random Just notes.
52:29>> that you keep for yourself. Okay.
52:31>> Yeah, just big fight about blah blah
52:34blah. Like Like just random little
52:37stupid tags of
52:39why he was mad at me.
52:40>> Okay. Is that something that you're
52:42willing to share with me?
52:44>> Um
52:46I can share bits and pieces of it. Like
52:49>> Okay.
52:49>> I don't
52:52>> I know it's very personal, right? It's a
52:53journal. It's where you express yourself
52:56to
52:57write down your emotions and the trauma
52:59that you've gone through.
53:01Um
53:02And I I can't even imagine what you've
53:05gone through and just the trauma
53:07tonight, right?
53:09Um
53:11>> I don't even want to think about what
53:13happened tonight. Like I am like You're
53:15asking me about our relationship and I
53:17am
53:18picturing him still alive.
53:20>> Yeah.
53:20>> Like it's
53:24not real.
53:27>> Yeah.
53:29>> [ __ ]
53:32How do I tell my kids?
53:34>> Um I just wanted to talk to you
53:35personally for a moment.
53:36>> Yes.
53:38>> What do I tell my kids?
53:40>> Yeah.
53:42Appreciate you coming.
53:44>> You're welcome.
53:45>> That is a really
53:52challenging thing, right?
53:56The one thing
53:58that is happy you think
54:01I don't know if you were standing there,
54:02but it's like my daughter was like, I
54:04feel safe with you, Mommy.
54:06>> Like, yes.
54:12>> And they like
54:15there's points where I'm like, do you
54:16guys
54:17Daddy? And they're like, no.
54:20No, we don't.
54:22I'm like, okay.
54:25You don't want to say anything.
54:27But it's like
54:30they wouldn't just say no for nothing.
54:33>> Yeah.
54:35And you think that's because
54:37>> Because he's mean to them.
54:39>> Yeah.
54:39>> They remember that.
54:42Cuz it's not like they were on
54:44electronic when I asked them. They were
54:46ready to go to bed.
54:47>> Mhm.
54:48>> You don't have to talk.
54:50>> Okay.
54:51I just want to go, okay?
54:52>> I won't make you.
54:54>> Okay.
54:55>> I won't make you if you don't want to.
54:56It's like
54:58with a with a child like
55:01you don't force a child to give somebody
55:03a hug if they don't want to. Like, you
55:04just don't do it.
55:05>> Mhm.
55:06>> I'm not going to make them say goodnight
55:08to their dad if they don't want to.
55:11I'll
55:12I'll encourage them to come again and we
55:14can try again the next time. Like, I'm
55:16not going to I'm not keeping my kids our
55:19kids away from him.
55:20>> Okay.
55:21>> I'd like to keep the line of
55:21communication. That's very important.
55:24Like, he knew where we were.
55:25He had the address. He could come at any
55:27time he wanted.
55:31So.
55:37>> Um
55:39is there any that you want to talk about
55:41right now?
55:43You don't know.
55:44Okay.
55:46Um we may want
55:48Did Officer Neil, he gathered
55:52everybody's names and birthdays, right?
55:54>> Yes.
55:54>> From you.
55:55>> Yes.
55:55>> Babies' names and birthdays.
55:57>> Yes.
55:57>> Okay. I just
55:58>> can give Yeah, I can give those to you
55:59again.
56:00>> I just wanted to make sure.
56:01>> I'm a pro at it now.
56:02>> Absolutely. Oh, yeah. It's
56:05>> have a time to say.
56:05>> It's like almost
56:07>> two.
56:07>> Oh, [ __ ]
56:08>> I think if that clock is right, it's
56:10almost two.
56:11And then last
56:12>> about being on top of it.
56:14>> It's It's 2:00 right now. Um
56:18>> This is my normal bedtime though. Like
56:20>> Really?
56:21>> Well, so when I was out in California, I
56:24would go to bed about midnight.
56:26>> Mhm.
56:26>> And with the time change, it was about
56:271:00 here. And then it just slowly crept
56:30into two. And so like this is about the
56:33time where I'd be pouring myself into
56:35If that's the true time.
56:37>> Yes. Yes. Okay.
56:38>> Sounds
56:39>> And then how do you so awesome. She's
56:41just the best big sister. She just don't
56:44even
56:45You can sit my car seat. He just sits
56:47right down. Hey, little sister. I was
56:49like, "You're such a nice sister." And
56:52He just melts like
56:54>> And then but then you hear that
56:55screaming in there.
56:56>> Oh. Oh my god, siblings.
56:57>> Yeah.
56:58>> That that's that And yeah, it's also
57:002:00 in the morning.
57:02There's a lot to
57:03>> Yes. That's our
57:04>> Um
57:06Okay. And then
57:09All right.
57:11I think I think that's all, Daniel.
57:14Um
57:16That phone number that you gave me
57:17though, is it a good number that I can
57:18call you at? Oh.
57:19>> Yeah. If you give back my cell phone,
57:21you can reach me on it.
57:23>> That is true. That is true. It's just
57:25sitting right over on the nightstand.
57:27>> No, it's locked.
57:28>> Um
57:29>> It's crazy.
57:29>> birthday.
57:31>> It's It's kind of fun.
57:33>> Yes.
57:34>> Okay.
57:35Um
57:37already.
57:38I'm going to see, are you Do you want to
57:40go back in with kiddos?
57:42>> What do you need?
57:43>> Tell me what you need. Something.
57:44>> Um I just need to check in real quick.
57:47>> You want me to go that way? If I go that
57:48way, I'm not necessarily going in there
57:51and bugging them or
57:52>> You can do whatever you want. If you
57:54want to go back in and hang out with
57:55your kiddos, you're welcome to do that.
57:57>> and wait for you.
57:58>> He's fine.
57:59He's fine. So, if you need a moment to
58:01kind of like breathe and
58:02collect yourself and whatever you need.
58:05There's a bathroom. If you need more
58:07snacks.
58:09>> I will take you up on a potty break. Can
58:10you walk me to
58:11>> me Yeah, let me walk you down there.
58:12>> Yeah, please.
58:13>> Um
58:14it's just straight down the hall.
58:15>> Yeah, sure.
58:16>> It's not too far.
58:20>> Following the interrogation,
58:21investigators [music] began uncovering
58:22evidence that Katherine Rastelli had not
58:24simply been caught in the middle of a
58:26deadly confrontation.
58:28>> [music]
58:28>> Katherine was Matthew Rastelli's
58:30estranged wife, and the couple shared
58:32three children.
58:33About 3 weeks before the shooting,
58:35Katherine had left California with the
58:36children and gone to American Fork, Utah
58:38[music] to stay with her mother, Tracy
58:40Grist.
58:41She told detectives she needed a break
58:43from the marriage and [music] claimed
58:44Matthew had become verbally abusive.
58:46According to Katherine's initial
58:48account, Matthew then drove from
58:49Temecula to Utah
58:51>> [music]
58:51>> so they could discuss whether they would
58:52divorce, remain separated, or reconcile.
58:56Investigators later determined that
58:58Matthew's trip was [music] part of a
58:59murder plan involving Katherine, Tracy,
59:01and Katherine's brother, Kevin Ellis.
59:04>> [music]
59:04>> Katherine admitted she had allowed
59:05Matthew to believe reconciliation was
59:07possible and helped lure him to the
59:09house.
59:10Investigators [music] also discovered
59:12that Matthew's truck had been tracked
59:13during the drive with an Apple AirTag.
59:15When Matthew entered the darkened home
59:17on July 12th, Kevin [music] shot him
59:19seven times. The family initially
59:21claimed self-defense, but investigators
59:23concluded that a pocket knife had been
59:25planted in Matthew's [music] right hand.
59:27Matthew was left-handed and one of the
59:29gunshots had shattered his right wrist.
59:32Forensic [music] testing also found none
59:33of Matthew's DNA on the knife.
59:36A neighbor heard the gunfire at 10:09
59:38p.m. Tracy waited approximately 6
59:40[music] minutes before calling 911.
59:43Katherine pleaded guilty to
59:44second-degree murder, conspiracy to
59:46commit murder, [music]
59:48and felony discharge of a firearm.
59:50She received 1 to 15-year [music] terms
59:52for the murder and conspiracy charges
59:54along with 5 years to life for the
59:56firearm charge. Her sentence structure
59:58requires her [music] to serve at least 6
1:00:00years before becoming eligible for
1:00:02parole.
1:00:03Kevin was convicted of murder and
1:00:04obstruction of justice.
1:00:06>> [music]
1:00:06>> He received 15 years to life for murder,
1:00:09consecutive to 1 to 15 years for
1:00:11obstruction, along with additional
1:00:12weapons and drugs sentences.
1:00:15Altogether, he must serve at least 20
1:00:16years before parole can be considered.
1:00:19Tracy was convicted [music] of murder,
1:00:20conspiracy, and obstruction. She
1:00:22received consecutive terms of 15 years
1:00:24to life for murder, [music]
1:00:261 to 15 years for conspiracy, and 1 to
1:00:2915 years for obstruction. [music]
1:00:31The minimum portions of those sentences
1:00:33total 17 years. Although, there is no
1:00:36fixed [music] release date because the
1:00:37murder sentence carries a maximum of
1:00:39life.
1:00:40The judge also formally recommended that
1:00:42Tracy never be granted parole.
1:00:44Katherine was permanently barred from
1:00:46contacting her children.
1:00:47>> [music]
1:00:48>> Matthew's mother, Diane Rastelli,
1:00:50assumed guardianship of all three
1:00:52>> [music]
1:00:52>> and the children remain in the care of
1:00:54Matthew's family.
1:00:55Katherine, Kevin, and Tracy all remain
1:00:57incarcerated in Utah.
1:00:58>> [music]
1:00:59>> If you found this video informative,
1:01:00please consider leaving a like and
1:01:02subscribing to the channel as it really
1:01:04helps support our work and allows us to
1:01:06continue covering important stories like
1:01:08this one. Thank you.

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