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0:00Recorded Books presents
0:02A Court of Wings and Ruin by Sarah J.
0:05Maas,
0:07narrated by Elizabeth Evans.
0:11Resend.
0:13Two years before the wall.
0:16The buzzing flies and screaming
0:18survivors had long since replaced the
0:20beating war drums.
0:22The killing field was now a tangled
0:24sprawl of corpses, human and faerie
0:27alike, interrupted only by broken wings
0:30jutting toward the gray sky or the
0:32occasional bulk of a felled horse.
0:35With the heat, despite the heavy cloud
0:37cover, the smell would soon be
0:39unbearable.
0:40Flies already crawled along eyes gazing
0:43unblinkingly upward.
0:45They didn't differentiate between mortal
0:47and immortal flesh.
0:50I picked my way across the once grassy
0:52plain, marking the banners half buried
0:54in mud and gore.
0:56It took most of my lingering strength to
0:58keep my wings from dragging over corpse
1:00and armor.
1:02My own power had been depleted well
1:04before the carnage had stopped.
1:07I'd spent the final hours fighting as
1:09the mortals beside me had, with sword
1:11and fist and brute unrelenting focus.
1:15We'd held the lines against Maeve's
1:17legions. Hour after hour we'd held the
1:19lines as I had been ordered to do by my
1:22father, as I knew I must do.
1:25To falter here would have been the
1:27killing blow to our already sundering
1:29resistance.
1:31The keep looming at my back was too
1:33valuable to be yielded to the loyalists,
1:36not just for its location in the heart
1:38of the continent, but for the supplies
1:40it guarded, for the forges that
1:42smoldered day and night on its western
1:44side, toiling to stock our forces.
1:48The smoke of those forges now blended
1:50with the pyres already being kindled
1:52behind me. As I kept walking, scanning
1:55the faces of the dead,
1:57I made a note to dispatch any soldiers
1:59who could stomach it to claim weapons
2:01from either army. We needed them too
2:04desperately to bother with honor,
2:06especially since the other side did not
2:08bother with it at all.
2:10So still.
2:12The battlefield was so still compared
2:14with the slaughter and chaos that had
2:16finally halted hours ago.
2:19The loyalist army had retreated rather
2:21than surrender, leaving their dead for
2:23the crows.
2:25I edged around a fallen bay gelding. The
2:27beautiful beast's eyes still wide with
2:29terror, flies crusting his bloodied
2:32flank.
2:33The rider was twisted beneath it. The
2:35man's head partially severed. Not from a
2:38sword blow. No, those brutal gashes were
2:41claws.
2:43They wouldn't yield easily. The kingdoms
2:46and territories that wanted their human
2:47slaves would not lose this war unless
2:50they had no other choice. And even then,
2:53we'd learned the hard way very early on
2:56that they had no regard for the ancient
2:58rules and rights of battle.
3:00And for the fae territories that fought
3:02beside mortal warriors,
3:04we were to be stomped out like vermin.
3:08I waved away a fly that buzzed in my
3:10ear. My hand caked with blood both my
3:12own and foreign.
3:14I'd always thought death would be some
3:15sort of peaceful homecoming. A sweet sad
3:18lullaby to usher me into whatever waited
3:21afterward.
3:22I crunched down with an armored boot on
3:24the flagpole of a loyalist standard
3:26bearer, smearing red mud across the
3:29tuskt boar embroidered on its emerald
3:31flag.
3:32I now wondered if the lullaby of death
3:34was not a lovely song, but the droning
3:37of flies. If flies and maggots were all
3:40death's handmaidens.
3:42The battlefield stretched toward the
3:44horizon in every direction save the keep
3:46at my back.
3:48Three days we had held them off. Three
3:51days we had fought and died here,
3:54but we'd held the lines. Again and again
3:56I'd rallied human and faerie, had
3:59refused to let the loyalists break
4:00through, even when they'd hammered our
4:02vulnerable right flank with fresh troops
4:05on the second day.
4:07I'd used my power until it was nothing
4:08but smoke in my veins. And then I'd used
4:11my Illyrian training until swinging my
4:13shield and sword was all I knew, all I
4:16could manage against the hordes.
4:19A half-shredded Illyrian wing jutted
4:21from a cluster of High Fae corpses, as
4:24if it had taken all six of them to bring
4:26the warrior down, as if he'd taken them
4:28all out with him.
4:31My heartbeat pounded through my battered
4:32body as I hauled away the piled corpses.
4:36Reinforcements had arrived at dawn on
4:38the third and final day, sent by my
4:41father after my plea for aid.
4:43I had been too lost in battle rage to
4:45note who they were beyond an Illyrian
4:47unit, especially when so many had been
4:50wielding syphons. But in the hours since
4:53they'd saved our asses and turned the
4:54tide of the battle, I had not spotted
4:57either of my brothers amongst the
4:58living.
4:59Did not know if Cassian or Azriel had
5:02even fought on the plain.
5:04The latter was unlikely, as my father
5:06kept him close for spying,
5:08but Cassian
5:10Cassian could have been reassigned. I
5:12wouldn't have put it past my father to
5:14shift Cassian to a unit most likely to
5:16be slaughtered, as this one had been,
5:19barely half-limping off the battlefield
5:21earlier.
5:23My aching bloodied fingers dug into
5:25tented armor and clammy stiff flesh as I
5:28heaved away the last of the High Fae
5:30corpses piled atop the fallen Illyrian
5:33soldier.
5:34The dark hair, the golden brown skin,
5:37the same as Cassian's.
5:40But it was not Cassian's death-gray face
5:42that gaped at the sky.
5:44My breath whooshed from me, my lungs
5:46still raw from roaring, my lips dry and
5:49chapped. I needed water, badly.
5:53But nearby, another set of Illyrian
5:55wings poked up from the piled dead.
5:58I stumbled and lurched toward it,
6:00letting my mind drift someplace dark and
6:02quiet, while I righted the twisted neck
6:05to peer at the face beneath the simple
6:07helm.
6:08Not him.
6:10I picked my way through the corpses to
6:11another Illyrian.
6:13Then another.
6:14And another.
6:16Some I knew. Some I didn't. Still, the
6:20killing field stretched onward under the
6:22sky.
6:23Mile after mile, a kingdom of the
6:26rotting dead.
6:28And still
6:29I looked.
6:34Part 1
6:35Princess of Carrion
6:41Chapter 1
6:42Feyre
6:45The painting was a lie.
6:47A bright, pretty lie, bursting with pale
6:50pink blooms and fat beams of sunshine.
6:53I'd begun it yesterday, an idle study of
6:56the rose garden lurking beyond the open
6:58windows of the studio.
7:00Through the tangle of thorns and satiny
7:02leaves, the brighter green of the hills
7:04rolled away into the distance.
7:06Incessant, unrelenting spring.
7:09If I'd painted this glimpse into the
7:11court the way my gut had urged me, it
7:13would have been flesh-shredding thorns,
7:15flowers that choked off the sunlight for
7:17any plants smaller than them, and
7:19rolling hills stained red.
7:22But each brushstroke on the white canvas
7:24was calculated. Each dab and swirl of
7:26blending colors meant to portray not
7:28just idyllic spring,
7:30but a sunny disposition as well.
7:33Not too happy, but gladly, finally
7:36healing from horrors I carefully
7:38divulged.
7:39I I that in the past weeks I had my
7:42demeanor as intricately as one of these
7:44paintings. I supposed that if I had also
7:47chosen to show myself as I truly wished,
7:50I would have been adorned with
7:51flesh-shredding talons and hands that
7:53choked the life out of those now in my
7:55company. I would have left the gilded
7:57halls stained red.
8:00But not yet.
8:01"Not yet," I told myself with every
8:04brushstroke, with every move I'd made
8:06these weeks. Swift revenge helped no one
8:09and nothing but my own roiling rage.
8:12Even if every time I spoke to them, I
8:14heard Elaine sobbing as she was forced
8:16into the cauldron. Even if every time I
8:19looked at them, I saw Nesta fling that
8:21finger at the King of Hybern in a death
8:23promise.
8:24Even if every time I scented them, my
8:26nostrils were again full of the tang of
8:29Cassian's blood as it pooled on the dark
8:31stones of that bone castle.
8:34The paintbrush snapped between my
8:36fingers. I'd cleaved it in two. The pale
8:39handle damaged beyond repair.
8:42Cursing under my breath,
8:44I glanced to the windows, the doors.
8:47This place was too full of watching eyes
8:49to risk throwing it in the rubbish bin.
8:52I cast my mind around me like a net,
8:54trawling for any others near enough to
8:56witness, to be spying. I found none.
9:01I held my hands before me, one half of
9:03the brush in each palm.
9:05For a moment, I let myself see past the
9:08glamour that concealed the tattoo on my
9:10right hand and forearm. The markings of
9:12my true heart. My true title.
9:16High Lady of the Night Court.
9:18Half a thought had the broken paintbrush
9:20going up in flames.
9:23The fire did not burn me, even as it
9:25devoured wood and brush and paint.
9:28When it was nothing but smoke and ash, I
9:30invited in a wind that swept them from
9:32my palms and out the open windows.
9:35For good measure, I summoned a breeze
9:37from the garden to snake through the
9:39room, wiping away any lingering tendril
9:42of smoke, filling it with a musty,
9:44suffocating smell of roses.
9:47Perhaps when my task here was done, I'd
9:49burn this manor to the ground, too,
9:52starting with those roses.
9:54Two approaching presences tapped against
9:56the back of my mind, and I snatched up
9:59another brush, dipping it in the closest
10:01swirl of paint, and lowered the
10:03invisible dark snares I'd erected around
10:05this room to alert me of any visitors.
10:08I was working on the way the sunlight
10:10illuminated the delicate veins in a rose
10:12petal, trying not to think of how I'd
10:14once seen it do the same to Illyrian
10:16wings, when the doors opened.
10:19I made a good show of appearing lost in
10:21my work, hunching my shoulders a bit,
10:24angling my head, and made an even better
10:26show of slowly looking over my shoulder,
10:29as if the struggle to part myself from
10:31the painting was a true effort.
10:34But the battle was the smile I forced to
10:36my mouth, to my eyes, the real tell of a
10:40smile's genuine nature.
10:42I'd practiced in the mirror over and
10:44over,
10:46so my eyes easily crinkled as I gave a
10:48subdued, yet happy smile to Tamlin, to
10:51Lucien.
10:52"Sorry to interrupt," Tamlin said,
10:55scanning my face for any sign of the
10:57shadows I remembered to occasionally
10:59fall prey to, the ones I wielded to keep
11:02him at bay when the sun sank beyond
11:04those foothills.
11:06But I thought you might want to get
11:07ready for the meeting."
11:09I made myself swallow, lowered the
11:12paintbrush, no more than the nervous,
11:14unsure girl I'd been long ago.
11:17"Is
11:18you talked it over with Ianthe? She's
11:21truly coming?"
11:22I hadn't seen her yet, the High
11:24Priestess who had betrayed my sisters to
11:26Hybern, betrayed us to Hybern.
11:29And even if Rhysand's murky, swift
11:31reports through the mating bond had
11:33soothed some of my dread and terror, she
11:36was responsible for it, what had
11:38happened weeks ago.
11:40It was Lucien who answered, studying my
11:42painting as if it held the proof I knew
11:44he was searching for.
11:46"Yes, she had her reasons. She is
11:50willing to explain them to you."
11:52Perhaps along with her reasons for
11:54laying her hands on whatever males she
11:56pleased, whether they wished her to or
11:58not, for doing it to Rhys and Lucien.
12:02I wondered what Lucien truly made of it,
12:04and the fact that the collateral in her
12:06friendship with Hybern had wound up
12:08being his mate,
12:10Elain.
12:11We had not spoken of Elain save for
12:13once, the day after I'd returned.
12:16"Despite what Jurian implied regarding
12:18how my sisters will be treated by
12:20Rhysand," I had told him, "despite what
12:23the Night Court is like, they won't hurt
12:25Elain or Nesta like that. Not yet."
12:28Rhysand has more creative ways to harm
12:30them.
12:32Lucien still seemed to doubt it.
12:34But then again, I had also implied in my
12:37own gaps of memory that perhaps I had
12:40not received the same creativity or
12:42courtesy.
12:43That they believed it so easily, that
12:45they thought Rhysand would ever force
12:47someone.
12:49I added the insult to the long, long
12:51list of things to repay them for.
12:54I set down the brush and pulled off the
12:56paint-flecked smock, carefully laying it
12:58on the stool I'd been perched on for 2
13:00hours now.
13:02"I'll go change," I murmured, flicking
13:04my loose braid over a shoulder.
13:07Tamlin nodded, monitoring my every
13:09movement as I neared them.
13:12"The painting looks beautiful."
13:14"It's nowhere near done," I said,
13:16dredging up that girl who had shunned
13:18praise and compliments, who had wanted
13:20to go unnoticed. It's still a mess.
13:24Frankly, it was some of my best work,
13:26even if its soullessness was only
13:28apparent to me.
13:30"I think we all are." Tamlin offered
13:32with a tentative smile.
13:34I reined in the urge to roll my eyes and
13:37returned his smile, brushing my hand
13:39over his shoulder as I passed.
13:42Lucien was waiting outside my new
13:43bedroom when I emerged 10 minutes later.
13:47It had taken me two days to stop going
13:49to the old one, to turn right at the top
13:51of the stairs and not left.
13:53But there was nothing in that old
13:55bedroom.
13:56I'd looked into it once, the day after I
13:58returned.
14:00Shattered furniture, shredded bedding,
14:02clothes strewn about as if he'd gone
14:04looking for me inside the armoire.
14:07No one, it seemed, had been allowed in
14:09to clean.
14:10But it was the vines, the thorns that
14:13had made it unlivable.
14:15My old bedroom had been overrun with
14:16them. They'd curved and slithered over
14:19the walls, entwined themselves amongst
14:21the debris, as if they'd crawled off the
14:23trellises beneath my windows, as if a
14:26hundred years had passed and not months.
14:30That bedroom was now a tomb.
14:33I gathered the soft pink skirts of my
14:35gauzy dress in a hand and shut the
14:37bedroom door behind me.
14:39Lucien remained leaning against the door
14:41across from mine, his room.
14:44I didn't doubt he'd ensured I now stayed
14:46across from him, didn't doubt that the
14:48metal eye he possessed was always turned
14:51toward my own chambers, even while he
14:53slept.
14:55"I'm surprised you're so calm, given
14:57your promises in Hybern." Lucien said by
15:00way of greeting. The promise I'd made to
15:02kill the human queens, the king of
15:04Hybern, Jurian, and Ianthe for what
15:07they'd done to my sisters, to my
15:09friends.
15:11"You yourself said Ianthe had her
15:13reasons.
15:14Furious as I might be,
15:16I can hear her out."
15:18I had not told Lucien of what I knew
15:20regarding her true nature. It would mean
15:22explaining that Rhys had thrown her out
15:24of his own home, that Rhys had done it
15:26to defend himself and the members of his
15:28court, and it would raise too many
15:30questions, undermine too many carefully
15:33crafted lies that had kept him and his
15:35court, my court, safe.
15:39Though I wondered if, after Velaris, it
15:41was even necessary.
15:43Our enemies knew of the city, knew it
15:46was a place of good and peace, and had
15:48tried to destroy it at the first
15:50opportunity.
15:52The guilt for the attack on Velaris
15:54after Rhys had revealed it to those
15:55human queens would haunt my mate for the
15:58rest of our immortal lives.
16:01"She's going to spin a story that you'll
16:03want to hear." Lucien warned.
16:06I shrugged, heading down the carpeted
16:08empty hall.
16:09"I can decide for myself."
16:11"Though it sounds like you've already
16:13chosen not to believe her."
16:15He fell into step beside me.
16:17"She dragged two innocent women into
16:20this."
16:21"She was working to ensure Hybern's
16:23alliance held strong." Lucien halted me
16:25with a hand around my elbow. I allowed
16:28it because not allowing it, winnowing
16:31the way I'd done in the woods those
16:32months ago, or using an Illyrian
16:34defensive maneuver to knock him on his
16:36ass, would ruin my ruse.
16:39"You're smarter than that." I studied
16:41the broad tan hand wrapped around my
16:43elbow. Then I met one eye of russet and
16:46one of warring gold.
16:48"Lucien breathed. Where is he keeping
16:50her?"
16:51I knew who he meant. I shook my head.
16:55"I don't know. Rhysand has a hundred
16:57places where they could be, but I doubt
16:59he'd use any of them to hide Elain,
17:01knowing that I'm aware of them."
17:03"Tell me anyway. List all of them."
17:06"You'll die the moment you set foot in
17:08his territory."
17:10"I survived well enough when I found
17:11you."
17:13"You couldn't see that he had me in
17:14thrall. You let him take me back. Lie,
17:17lie, lie.
17:19But the hurt and guilt I expected
17:21weren't there. Lucien slowly released
17:23his grip.
17:25I need to find her.
17:27You don't even know Ianthe. The mating
17:29bond is just a physical reaction
17:31overriding your good sense. Is that what
17:33it did to you and Rhys?
17:35A quiet, dangerous question, but I made
17:38fear enter my eyes, let myself drag up
17:41memories of the Weaver, the Carver, the
17:43Midgard Worm, so that old terror
17:45drenched my scent.
17:47I don't want to talk about that, I said,
17:50my voice a rasping wobble.
17:52A clock chimed on the main level. I sent
17:55a silent prayer of thanks to the Mother
17:57and launched into a quick walk.
18:00We'll be late.
18:01Lucien only nodded. But I felt his gaze
18:04on my back, fixed right on my spine as I
18:07headed downstairs to see Ianthe,
18:11and at last decide how I was going to
18:13shred her into pieces.
18:18The High Priestess looked exactly as I
18:19remembered, both in those memories Rhys
18:22had shown me and in my own daydreams of
18:24using the talons hidden beneath my nails
18:26to carve out her eyes, then her tongue,
18:29then open up her throat.
18:31My rage had become a living thing inside
18:33my chest, an echoing heartbeat that
18:36soothed me to sleep and stirred me to
18:38waking.
18:39I quieted it as I stared at Ianthe
18:41across the formal dining table, Tamlin
18:44and Lucien flanking me.
18:46She still wore the pale hood and silver
18:48circlet set with its limpid blue stone.
18:51Like a siphon.
18:53The jewel in its center reminded me of
18:55Azriel's and Cassian's siphons, and I
18:58wondered if, like the Illyrian warriors,
19:00the jewel somehow helped shape an
19:02unwieldy gift of magic into something
19:04more refined, deadlier.
19:07She had never removed it, but then
19:09again, I had never seen Ianthe summon
19:11any greater power than igniting a ball
19:13of faelight in a room.
19:16The High Priestess lowered her teal eyes
19:18to the dark wood table, the hood casting
19:20shadows on her perfect face. "I wish to
19:23begin by saying how truly sorry I am. I
19:27acted out of a desire to
19:29to grant what I believed you perhaps
19:31yearned for, but did not dare voice,
19:34while also keeping our allies in Hybern
19:36satisfied with our allegiance."
19:39Pretty poisoned lies. But finding her
19:41true motive, I'd been waiting these
19:44weeks for this meeting, had spent these
19:46weeks pretending to convalesce,
19:48pretending to heal from the horrors I'd
19:50survived at Rhysand's hands.
19:52Why would I ever wish for my sisters to
19:54endure that? My voice came out
19:57trembling, cold.
19:59Ianthe lifted her head, scanning my
20:01unsure, if not a bit aloof, face.
20:04"So you could be with them forever.
20:07And if Lucien had discovered that Elain
20:08was his mate before, and it would have
20:11been devastating to realize he'd only
20:13have a few decades."
20:16The sound of Elain's name on her lips
20:18sent a snarl rumbling up my throat, but
20:21I leashed it, falling into that mask of
20:23pained quiet, the newest in my arsenal.
20:27Lucien answered, "If you expect our
20:29gratitude, you'll be waiting a while,
20:31Ianthe."
20:33Tamlin shot him a warning look, both at
20:35the words and the tone.
20:37Perhaps Lucien would kill Ianthe before
20:39I had the chance, just for the horror
20:41she'd put his mate through that day.
20:44"No," Ianthe breathed, eyes wide, the
20:47perfect picture of remorse and guilt.
20:50"No, I don't expect gratitude in the
20:52least, or forgiveness,
20:54but understanding.
20:57This is my home, too." She lifted a
20:59slender hand clad in silver rings and
21:02bracelets to encompass the room, the
21:04manor.
21:06"We have all had to make alliances we
21:07didn't believe we'd ever forge. Perhaps
21:10unsavory ones, yes, but Hybern's force
21:14is too great to stop. It can now only be
21:17weathered like any other storm.
21:20A glance toward Tamlin.
21:22We have worked so hard to prepare
21:24ourselves for Hybern's inevitable
21:25arrival all these months.
21:28I made a grave mistake and I will always
21:31regret any pain I caused, but let us
21:34continue this good work together. Let us
21:36find a way to ensure our lands and
21:39people survive.
21:41At the cost of how many others? Lucien
21:43demanded. Again, that warning look from
21:46Tamlin, but Lucien ignored him.
21:48What I saw in Hybern, Lucien said,
21:51gripping the arms of his chair hard
21:53enough that the carved wood groaned. Any
21:56promises he made of peace and immunity
21:59He halted as if remembering that Ianthe
22:01might very well feed this back to the
22:03king.
22:04He loosened his grip on the chair, his
22:06long fingers flexing before settling on
22:08the arms again.
22:10We have to be careful.
22:13We will be, Tamlin promised, but we've
22:15already agreed to certain conditions,
22:17sacrifices. If we break apart now, even
22:21with Hybern as our ally, we have to
22:23present a solid front together.
22:26He still trusted her, still thought that
22:29Ianthe had merely made a bad call, had
22:31no idea what lurked beneath the beauty,
22:34the clothes, and the pious incantations.
22:37But then again,
22:38that same blindness kept him from
22:40realizing what prowled beneath my skin
22:42as well.
22:43Ianthe bowed her head again.
22:46I will endeavor to be worthy of my
22:48friends.
22:50Lucien seemed to be trying very, very
22:52hard not to roll his eyes, but Tamlin
22:55said,
22:56We'll all try.
22:58That was his new favorite word, try.
23:01I only swallowed, making sure he heard
23:03it, and nodded slowly, keeping my eyes
23:06on Ianthe.
23:08"Don't ever do anything like that
23:10again." A fool's command, one she'd
23:12expected me to make from the quickness
23:14with which she nodded.
23:16Lucien leaned back in his seat, refusing
23:18to say anything else.
23:20"Lucien is right, though," I blurted,
23:23the portrait of concern. "What of the
23:25people in this court during this
23:26conflict?" I frowned at Tamlin. "They
23:29were brutalized by Amarantha.
23:32I'm not sure how well they will endure
23:34living beside Hybern.
23:36They have suffered enough."
23:38Tamlin's jaw tightened. "Hybern has
23:41promised that our people shall remain
23:42untouched and undisturbed."
23:45"Our people," I nearly scowled, even as
23:48I nodded again in understanding.
23:50"It was a part of our bargain."
23:53When he'd sold out all of Prythian, sold
23:55out everything decent and good in
23:57himself to retrieve me.
23:59"Our people will be safe when Hybern
24:01arrives, though I've sent out word that
24:03families should relocate to the eastern
24:06part of the territory for the time
24:08being."
24:10Good. At least he'd considered those
24:12potential casualties. At least he cared
24:14that much about his people, understood
24:17what sorts of sick games Hybern liked to
24:19play, and that he might swear one thing
24:21but mean another.
24:23If he was already moving those most at
24:25risk during this conflict out of the
24:26way, it made my work here all the
24:29easier. And east, a bit of information I
24:32tucked away. If east was safe, then the
24:35west. Hybern would indeed be coming from
24:38that direction, arriving there.
24:41Tamlin blew out a breath.
24:42"That brings me to the other reason
24:44behind this meeting." I braced myself,
24:47schooling my face into bland curiosity
24:50as he declared,
24:51"The first delegation from Hybern
24:53arrives tomorrow."
24:55Lucien's golden skin paled. Tamlin
24:58added, "Jurian will be here by noon."
25:05Chapter 2
25:08I'd barely heard a whisper of Jurian
25:10these past weeks, hadn't seen the
25:12resurrected human commander since that
25:14night in Hybern. Jurian had been reborn
25:17through the Cauldron using the hideous
25:18remnants of him that Amarantha had
25:20hoarded as trophies for 500 years. His
25:23soul trapped and aware within his own
25:25magically preserved eye, he was mad, had
25:29gone mad long before the King of Hybern
25:31had resurrected him to lead the human
25:32queens down a path of ignorant
25:35submission.
25:36Tamlin and Lucien had to know, had to
25:39have seen that gleam in Jurian's eyes.
25:41But,
25:43they also did not seem to entirely mind
25:45that the King of Hybern possessed the
25:46Cauldron, that it was capable of
25:48cleaving this world apart, starting with
25:51the wall,
25:52the only thing standing between the
25:54gathering lethal fae armies and the
25:56vulnerable human lands below.
25:59No, that threat certainly didn't seem to
26:01keep Lucien or Tamlin awake at night, or
26:04from inviting these monsters into their
26:06home.
26:08Tamlin had promised upon my return that
26:10I was to be included in the planning, in
26:12every meeting,
26:14and he was true to his word when he
26:15explained that Jurian would arrive with
26:17two other commanders from Hybern, and I
26:19would be present for it.
26:21They indeed wished to survey the wall,
26:24to test for the perfect spot to rend it
26:26once the Cauldron had recovered its
26:27strength.
26:29Turning my sisters into fae, apparently,
26:32had drained it. My smugness at the fact
26:34was short-lived.
26:36My first task, learn where they planned
26:38to strike and how long the Cauldron
26:40required to return to its full capacity,
26:43and then smuggle that information to
26:45Rhysand and the others.
26:48I took extra care dressing the next day
26:51after sleeping fitfully thanks to a
26:53dinner with a guilt-ridden Ianthe who
26:55went to excessive lengths to kiss my ass
26:57and Lucian's.
26:59The priestess apparently wished to wait
27:01until the Hybern commanders were settled
27:03before making her appearance. She'd
27:05cooed about wanting to ensure they had
27:07the chance to get to know us before she
27:09intruded.
27:10But one look at Lucian told me that he
27:12and I, for once, agreed. She had likely
27:15planned some sort of grand entrance.
27:18It made little difference to me, to my
27:20plans.
27:22Plans that I sent down the mating bond
27:24the next morning, words and images
27:26tumbling along a night-filled corridor.
27:29I did not dare risk using the bond too
27:31often.
27:32I had communicated with Rhysand only
27:34once since I'd arrived. Just once, in
27:38the hours after I'd walked into my old
27:40bedroom and spied the thorns that had
27:42conquered it.
27:43It had been like shouting across a great
27:45distance, like speaking underwater. "I
27:48am safe and well." I'd fired down the
27:50bond. "I'll tell you what I know soon."
27:53I'd waited, letting the words travel
27:55into the dark. Then I'd asked, "Are they
27:59alive? Hurt?"
28:01I didn't remember the bond between us
28:03being so hard to hear, even when I
28:05dwelled on this estate and he'd used it
28:08to see if I was still breathing, to make
28:10sure my despair hadn't swallowed me
28:12whole.
28:13But Rhysand's response had come a minute
28:15later.
28:16"I love you. They are alive. They are
28:19healing."
28:21That it, as if it was all that he could
28:23manage. I had drifted back to my new
28:25chambers, locked the door, and enveloped
28:28the entire place in a wall of hard air
28:30to keep any scent from my silent tears
28:32escaping as I curled up in a corner of
28:35the bathing room.
28:37I had once sat in such a position,
28:39watching the stars during the long bleak
28:41hours of the night.
28:43Now I took in the cloudless blue sky
28:45beyond the open window, listened to the
28:48birds singing to one another, and wanted
28:51to roar.
28:52I had not dared to ask for more details
28:54about Cassian and Azriel or my sisters
28:58in terror of knowing just how bad it had
29:00been and what I'd do if their healing
29:02turned grim, what I'd bring down upon
29:05these people.
29:07Healing. Alive and healing, I reminded
29:10myself of that every day.
29:12Even when I still heard their screams,
29:14smelled their blood.
29:16But I did not ask for more, did not risk
29:19touching the bond beyond that first
29:21time. I didn't know if someone could
29:23monitor such things, the silent messages
29:26between mates, not when the mating bond
29:28could be scented and I was playing such
29:30a dangerous game with it.
29:32Everyone believed it had been severed,
29:34that Rhys's lingering scent was because
29:36he'd forced me, had planted that scent
29:39in me.
29:40They believed that with time, with
29:41distance, his scent would fade. Weeks or
29:44months, likely.
29:46And when it didn't fade, when it
29:48remained,
29:49that's when I'd have to strike, with or
29:52without the information I needed. But
29:54out of the possibility that
29:55communicating down the bond kept its
29:57scent strong, I had to minimize how much
30:00I used it.
30:01Even if not talking to Rhys, not hearing
30:04that amusement and cunning, I would hear
30:07those things again, I promised myself
30:09over and over. See that wry smile.
30:13And I was again thinking of how pained
30:15that face had been the last time I'd
30:17seen it, thinking of Rhys covered in
30:19Azriel's and Cassian's blood.
30:22As Jurian and the two Hybern commanders
30:24winnowed into the gravel of the front
30:26drive the next day,
30:29Jurian was in the same light leather
30:30armor, his brown hair whipping across
30:33his face in the blustery spring breeze.
30:36He spied us standing on the white marble
30:37steps into the house and his mouth
30:40curled in that crooked smug smile.
30:43I willed ice into my veins, the coldness
30:45from a court I had never set foot in.
30:48But I wielded its master's gift on
30:49myself, turning burning rage into frozen
30:52calm as Jurian swaggered toward us, a
30:55hand on the hilt of his sword.
30:58But it was the two commanders, one male,
31:00one female, that had a sliver of true
31:03fear sliding into my heart.
31:05High fae in appearance, their skin the
31:08same ruddy hue and hair the identical
31:10inky black as their king.
31:13But it was their vacant unfeeling faces
31:15that snagged the eye. A lack of emotion
31:18honed from millennia of cruelty.
31:21Tamlin and Lucien had gone rigid by the
31:23time Jurian halted at the foot of the
31:24sweeping front stairs.
31:26The human commander smirked. "You're
31:28looking better than the last time I saw
31:30you."
31:32I dragged my eyes to his and said
31:34nothing. Jurian snorted and gestured the
31:37two commanders forward. "May I present
31:40their highnesses, Prince Dagdan and
31:42Princess Bryanna, nephew and niece to
31:44the king of Hybern."
31:46Twins, perhaps linked in power and
31:49mental bonds as well.
31:51Tamlin seems to remember that these were
31:53now his allies and marched down the
31:55stairs. Lucien followed.
31:58He'd sold us out, sold out Prythian for
32:01me to get me back. Smoke curled in my
32:04mouth. I willed frost to fill it again.
32:08Tamlin inclined his head to the prince
32:10and princess.
32:11"Welcome to my home. We have rooms
32:13prepared for all of you."
32:15"My brother and I shall reside in one
32:17together." the princess said. Her voice
32:20was deceptively light, almost girlish.
32:23The utter lack of feeling, the utter
32:25authority was anything but.
32:27I could practically feel the snide
32:29remark simmering in Lucien.
32:31But I stepped down the stairs and said,
32:33ever the lady of the house that these
32:35people, that Tamlin had once expected me
32:37to gladly embrace.
32:39We can easily make adjustments.
32:42Lucien's metal eye whirred and narrowed
32:44on me, but I kept my face impassive as I
32:47curtsied to them, to my enemy.
32:50Which of my friends would face them on
32:52the battlefield?
32:54Would Cassian and Azriel have even
32:55healed enough to fight, let alone lift a
32:58sword?
32:59I did not allow myself to dwell on it,
33:01on how Cassian had screamed as his wings
33:03had been shredded.
33:05Princess Brianna surveyed me. The
33:08rose-colored dress, the hair that Alice
33:10had curled and braided over the top of
33:12my head in a coronet, the pale pink
33:14pearls at my ears.
33:16A harmless, lovely package, perfect for
33:19a High Lord to mount whenever he wished.
33:22Brianna's lip curled as she glanced at
33:24her brother. The prince deemed the same
33:27thing, judging by his answering sneer.
33:30Tamlin snarled softly in warning.
33:33If you're done staring at her, perhaps
33:35we can move on to the business between
33:37us. Jurian let out a low chuckle and
33:40strode up the stairs without being given
33:42leave to do so.
33:44They're curious. Lucien stiffened at the
33:46impudence of the gesture, the words.
33:49It's not every century that the
33:51contested possession of a female
33:53launches a war, especially a female with
33:56such talents.
33:59I only turned on a heel and stalked up
34:01the steps after him.
34:02Perhaps if you'd bothered going to war
34:04over Miriam, she wouldn't have left you
34:06for Prince Drakon.
34:08A ripple seemed to go through Jurian.
34:11Tamlin and Lucien tensed at my back,
34:13torn between monitoring our exchange and
34:16escorting the two Hybern royals into the
34:18house.
34:19Upon my own explanation that Azriel and
34:21his network of spies were well trained,
34:24we'd cleared any unnecessary servants,
34:26wary of spying ears and eyes. Only the
34:29most trusted among them remained.
34:32Of course, I'd forgotten to mention that
34:34I knew Azriel had pulled his spies weeks
34:37ago, the information not worth the cost
34:39of their lives, or that it served my own
34:42purposes to have fewer people watching
34:44me.
34:46Jurian halted at the top of the stairs,
34:48his face a mask of cruel death as I took
34:50the last steps to him.
34:53"Careful what you say, girl."
34:55I smiled, breezing past. "Or what?
34:58You'll throw me in the cauldron?"
35:01I strode between the front doors, edging
35:03around the table in the heart of the
35:05entry hall, its towering vase of flowers
35:07arching to meet the crystal chandelier.
35:10Right there,
35:12just a few feet away, I had crumpled
35:14into a ball of terror and despair all
35:16those months ago.
35:18Right there in the center of the foyer,
35:20Mor had picked me up and carried me out
35:22of this house and into freedom.
35:25"Here's the first rule of this visit," I
35:27said to Jurian over my shoulder as I
35:29headed for the dining room where lunch
35:31awaited. "Don't threaten me in my own
35:34home."
35:35The posturing, I knew a moment later,
35:38had worked. Not on Jurian, who glowered
35:40as he claimed a seat at the table, but
35:43on Tamlin, who brushed a knuckle over my
35:45cheek as he passed by, unaware of how
35:48carefully I had chosen the words, how I
35:50had baited Jurian to serve up the
35:52opportunity on a platter.
35:55That was my first step, make Tamlin
35:57believe, truly believe, that I loved him
36:01and this place and everyone in it,
36:04so that he would not suspect when I
36:06turned them on each other.
36:10Prince Dagdan yielded to his twin's
36:12every wish and order as if he were the
36:14blade she wielded to slice through the
36:16world. He poured her drinks, sniffing
36:19them first. He selected the finest cuts
36:21of meat from the platters and neatly
36:23arranged them on her plate. He always
36:26let her answer and never so much as
36:28looked at her with doubt in his eyes.
36:30One soul in two bodies, and from the way
36:33they glanced to each other in wordless
36:35exchanges, I wondered if they were
36:37perhaps
36:39perhaps like me, daemati.
36:42My mental shields had been a wall of
36:43black adamant since arriving,
36:46but as we dined, beats of silence going
36:48on longer than conversation, I found
36:51myself checking them over and over.
36:54"We will set out for the wall tomorrow,"
36:57Breonna was saying to Tamlin, more of an
36:59order than a request. "Jarian will
37:01accompany us. We require the use of
37:04sentries who know where the holes in it
37:06are located."
37:07The thought of them so close to the
37:09human lands,
37:11but my sisters were not there. No, my
37:13sisters were somewhere in the vast
37:15territory of my own court, protected by
37:18my friends, even if my father would
37:20return home from his business dealings
37:22on the continent in a matter of a month
37:24or two.
37:25I still had not figured out how I'd tell
37:27him.
37:28"Lucian and I can escort you," I
37:30offered. Tamlin whipped his head to me.
37:33I waited for the refusal, the shutdown,
37:37but it seemed the High Lord had indeed
37:38learned his lesson, was indeed willing
37:41to try, as he merely gestured to Lucian.
37:44"My emissary knows the wall as well as
37:47any sentry."
37:49You are letting them do this. You are
37:51rationally allowing them to bring down
37:53that wall and prey upon the humans on
37:55the other side.
37:57The words tangled and hissed in my
37:59mouth,
38:00but I made myself give Tamlin a slow, if
38:03not slightly displeased, nod.
38:05He knew I'd never be happy about it. The
38:08girl he believed had been returned to
38:09him would always seek to protect her
38:11mortal homeland.
38:13Yet he thought I'd stomach it for him,
38:15for us, that Hybern wouldn't feast on
38:18the humans once that wall came down,
38:20that we'd merely absorb them into our
38:22territory.
38:24"We'll leave after breakfast," I told
38:26the princess, and I added to Tamlin,
38:29"with a few centuries as well."
38:32His shoulders loosened at that.
38:34I wondered if he'd heard how I'd
38:35defended Velaris, that I had protected
38:38the rainbow against a legion of beasts
38:40like the Ador, that I had slaughtered
38:42the Ador brutally, cruelly for what it
38:45had done to me and mine.
38:48Jurian surveyed Lucien with a warrior's
38:50frankness.
38:51"I always wondered who made that eye
38:53after she carved it out."
38:56We did not speak of Amarantha here. We
38:58had never allowed her presence into this
39:00house, and it had stifled me for those
39:03months I'd lived here after under the
39:04mountain, killed me day by day to shove
39:07those fears and pain down deep.
39:10For a heartbeat, I weighed who I had
39:12been with who I was now supposed to be,
39:15slowly healing, emerging back into the
39:17girl Tamlin had fed and sheltered and
39:20loved before Amarantha had snapped my
39:22neck after 3 months of torture.
39:25So I shifted in my seat, studied the
39:27table.
39:29Lucien merely leveled a hard look at
39:31Jurian as the two Hybern royals watched
39:33with impassive faces.
39:36"I have an old [clears throat] friend at
39:37the Dawn Court. She's skilled at
39:39tinkering, blending magic and machinery.
39:43Tamlin got her to craft it for me at
39:45great risk."
39:46A hateful smile from Jurian.
39:49"Does your little mate have a rival?"
39:52"My mate is none of your concern."
39:55Jurian shrugged. "She shouldn't be any
39:57of yours either, considering she's
39:59probably been [ __ ] by half the
40:00Illyrian army by now."
40:03I was fairly certain that only centuries
40:05of training kept Lucien from leaping
40:07over the table to rip out Jurian's
40:09throat,
40:10but it was Tamlin's snarl that rattled
40:12the glasses. "You will behave as a
40:14proper guest, Jurian, or you will sleep
40:17in the stables like the other beasts.
40:20Jurian merely sipped from his wine.
40:22Why should I be punished for stating the
40:24truth? Neither of you were in the war
40:27when my forces allied with the Illyrian
40:29brutes. A sidelong glance at the two
40:32Hybern royals.
40:34I suppose you two had the delight of
40:36fighting against them.
40:38We kept the wings of their generals and
40:40lords as trophies, Dagdan said with a
40:42small smile. It took every bit of
40:45concentration not to glance at Tamlin,
40:47not to demand the whereabouts of the two
40:49sets of wings his father had kept as
40:51trophies after he'd butchered Rhysand's
40:53mother and sister.
40:55Pinned in the study, Rhys had said.
40:58But I hadn't spotted any trace when I
41:00gone hunting for them upon returning
41:02here, feigning exploration out of sheer
41:05boredom on a rainy day.
41:07The cellars had yielded nothing either.
41:09No trunks or crates or locked rooms
41:12containing those wings.
41:14The two bites of roasted lamb I'd forced
41:16down now rebelled against me.
41:19But at least any hint of disgust was a
41:21fair reaction to what the Hybern prince
41:23had claimed.
41:24Jurian indeed smiled at me as he sliced
41:27his lamb into little pieces.
41:29You know that we fought together, don't
41:32you? Me and your High Lord. Held the
41:34lines against the loyalists, battled
41:37side by side until gore was up to our
41:39shins.
41:41He is not her High Lord, Tamlin said
41:44with unnerving softness. Jurian only
41:46purred at me. He must have told you
41:49where he hid Miriam and Drakeon.
41:51They're dead, I said flatly.
41:54The Cauldron says otherwise.
41:57Cold fear settled into my gut. He'd
42:00tried it already to resurrect Miriam for
42:02himself and had found that she was not
42:04amongst the deceased.
42:07I was told they were dead, I said again,
42:09trying to sound bored, impatient. I took
42:12a bite of my lamb, so bland compared to
42:15the wealth of spices in Velaris.
42:18I'd think you'd have better things to
42:19do, Jurian, than obsess over the lover
42:22who jilted you.
42:23His eyes gleamed, bright with five
42:26centuries of madness, as he skewered a
42:28morsel of meat with his fork.
42:30They say you were [ __ ] Rhysand before
42:32you ever jilted your own lover.
42:35"That is enough," Tamlin growled. But I
42:38felt it then, the tap against my mind,
42:41saw their plan clear and simple. Rile
42:44us, distract us, while the two quiet
42:47royals slid into our minds.
42:49Mine was shielded, but Lucians, Tamlins?
42:53I reached out with my night-kissed
42:55power, casting it like a net, and found
42:58two oily tendrils spearing for Lucians
43:00and Tamlins' minds, as if they were
43:02indeed javelins thrown across the table.
43:05I struck. Dagdan and Brannagh jolted
43:08back in their seats as if I'd landed a
43:10physical blow, while their powers
43:12slammed into a barrier of black adamant
43:14around Lucians and Tamlins' minds.
43:17They shot their dark eyes toward me. I
43:19held each of their gazes.
43:22"What's wrong?" Tamlin asked, and I
43:24realized how quiet it had become.
43:27I made a good show of furrowing my brow
43:29in confusion.
43:31"Nothing." I offered a sweet smile to
43:33the two royals.
43:35"Their Highnesses must be tired after
43:37such a long journey."
43:39And for good measure, I lunged for their
43:41own minds, finding a wall of white bone.
43:44They flinched as I dragged black talons
43:46down their mental shields, gouging deep.
43:49The warning blow cost me, a low pulsing
43:52headache forming around my temples.
43:55But I merely dug back into my food,
43:57ignoring Jurian's wink.
44:00No one spoke for the rest of the meal.
44:06Chapter 3
44:08The spring woods fell silent as we rode
44:11between the budding trees. Birds and
44:13small furred beasts having darted for
44:15cover long before we passed. Not from me
44:18or Lucien or the three centuries
44:20trailing a respectful distance behind.
44:23But from Jurian and the two Highborn
44:25commanders who rode in the center of our
44:27party.
44:28As if they were as awful as the bogey,
44:30as the naga.
44:32We reached the wall without incident or
44:34Jurian trying to bait us into
44:36distraction.
44:37I'd been awake most of the night casting
44:40my awareness through the manor hunting
44:42for any sign that Dagdan and Brannagh
44:44were working their daemati influence on
44:46anyone else. Mercifully, the
44:48curse-breaking ability I'd inherited
44:50from Helion Spell-Cleaver, High Lord of
44:52the Day Court, had detected no tangles,
44:55no spells, save for the wards around the
44:58house itself preventing anyone from
45:00winnowing in or out.
45:02Tamlin had been tense at breakfast. But
45:05had not asked me to remain behind. I'd
45:07even gone so far as to test him by
45:09asking what was wrong, to which he'd
45:11only replied that he had a headache.
45:14Lucien had just patted him on the
45:15shoulder and promised to look after me.
45:18I'd nearly laughed at the words.
45:20But laughter was now far from my lips as
45:23the wall pulsed and throbbed, a heavy
45:26hideous presence that loomed from half a
45:28mile away.
45:29Up close, though, even our horses were
45:32skittish, tossing their heads and
45:34stomping their hooves on the mossy earth
45:37as we tied them to the low-hanging
45:38branches of blooming dogwoods.
45:41The gap in the wall is right up here,
45:44Lucien was saying, sounding about as
45:46thrilled as me to be in such company.
45:49Stomping over the fallen pink blossoms,
45:51Dagdan and Brannagh slid into step
45:53beside him, Jurian slithering off to
45:56survey the terrain, the centuries
45:58remaining with our mounts.
46:00I followed Lucien and the royals,
46:02keeping a casual distance behind. I knew
46:05my elegant fine clothes weren't fooling
46:07the prince and princess into forgetting
46:09that a fellow demati now walked at their
46:11backs, but I'd still carefully selected
46:14the embroidered sapphire jacket and
46:16brown pants, adorned only with the
46:18jeweled knife and belt that Lucian had
46:20once gifted me a lifetime ago.
46:23"Who cleaved the wall here?" Branna
46:26asked, surveying the hole that we could
46:28not see. No, the wall itself was utterly
46:31invisible, but rather felt as if the air
46:34had been sucked from one spot.
46:36"We don't know." Lucian replied, the
46:39dappled sunlight glinting along the gold
46:41thread adorning his fawn brown jacket as
46:44he crossed his arms.
46:45"Some of the holes just appeared over
46:47the centuries. This one is barely wide
46:49enough for one person to get through."
46:52An exchanged glance between the twins. I
46:55came up behind them studying the gap,
46:58the wall around it that made every
47:00instinct recoil at its wrongness.
47:04"This is where I came through that first
47:06time."
47:08Lucian nodded, and the other two lifted
47:10their brows.
47:11But I took a step closer to Lucian, my
47:14arm nearly brushing his, letting him be
47:16a barrier between us.
47:18They'd been more careful at breakfast
47:20this morning about pushing against my
47:21mental shields. Yet now, letting them
47:24think I was physically cowed by them,
47:27Branna studied how closely I stood to
47:29Lucian, how he shifted slightly to
47:31shield me, too.
47:33A little cold smile curled her lips.
47:37"How many holes are in the wall?"
47:39"We've counted three along our entire
47:41border." Lucian said tightly. "Plus one
47:45off the coast, about a mile away."
47:48I didn't let my cool mask falter as he
47:50offered up the information, but Branna
47:52shook her head, dark hair devouring the
47:55sunlight.
47:56"The sea entrances are of no use. We
47:59need to break it on the land.
48:01The continent surely has spots, too.
48:05Their queens have an even weaker grasp
48:07on their people than you do, Dagdan
48:09said. I plucked up that gem of
48:11information, studied it.
48:13We'll leave you to explore it then, I
48:16said, waving toward the hole.
48:18When you're done, we'll ride to the
48:19next.
48:21It's 2 days from here, Lucien countered.
48:24Then we'll plan a trip for that
48:26excursion, I said simply. Before Lucien
48:29could object, I asked, "And the third
48:31hole?"
48:32Lucien tapped a foot against the mossy
48:34ground, but said,
48:36"2 days past that."
48:38I turned to the royals, arching a brow.
48:41"Can both of you winnow?"
48:43Brannagh flushed, straightening, but it
48:45was Dagdan who admitted, "I can."
48:48He must have carried both Brannagh and
48:50Jurian when they arrived. He added,
48:53"Only a few miles if I bear others."
48:56I merely nodded and headed toward a
48:57tangle of stooping dogwoods, Lucien
49:00following closely behind.
49:02When there was nothing but rustling pink
49:04blossoms and trickling sunlight through
49:06the thatch of branches, when the royals
49:09had busied themselves with the wall, out
49:11of sight and sound, I took up a perch on
49:14a smooth, bald rock.
49:16Lucien sat against a nearby tree,
49:18folding one booted ankle over another.
49:22"Whatever you're planning, it'll land us
49:24knee-deep in shit."
49:26"I'm not planning anything." I plucked
49:28up a fallen pink blossom and twirled it
49:31between my thumb and forefinger.
49:33That golden eye narrowed, clicking
49:35softly.
49:37"What do you even see with that thing?"
49:39He didn't answer.
49:41I chucked the blossom onto the soft moss
49:43between us.
49:45"Don't trust me after all we've been
49:47through?"
49:48He frowned at the discarded blossom, but
49:50still said nothing.
49:52I busied myself by sorting through my
49:54pack until I found the canteen of water.
49:57"If you'd been alive for the war," I
49:59asked him, taking a swig,
50:02"would you have fought on their side, or
50:04fought for the humans?"
50:06"I would have been a part of the
50:07human-fae alliance."
50:09"Even if your father wasn't?"
50:11"Especially if my father wasn't."
50:14But Beron had been part of that
50:16alliance, if I correctly recalled my
50:18lessons with Rhys all those months ago.
50:21"And yet here you are, ready to march
50:23with Hybern."
50:25"I did it for you, too, you know." Cold,
50:28hard words. "I went with him to get you
50:31back.
50:32I never realized what a powerful
50:33motivator guilt can be.
50:36That day you went away," he said,
50:39struggling to avoid that other word,
50:41"left. I beat Tamlin back to the manor,
50:44received the message when we were out on
50:46the border, and raced here.
50:48But the only trace of you was that ring,
50:51melted between the stones of the parlor.
50:53I got rid of it a moment before Tam
50:55arrived home to see it."
50:58A probing, careful statement of the
51:00facts that pointed not toward abduction.
51:04"They melted it off my finger," I lied.
51:07His throat bobbed, but he just shook his
51:09head, the sunlight leaking through the
51:11forest canopy setting the ember red of
51:13his hair flickering.
51:15We sat in silence for minutes. From the
51:18rustling and murmuring, the royals were
51:20finishing up, and I braced myself,
51:23calculating the words I'd need to wield
51:25without seeming suspicious.
51:27I said quietly,
51:29"Thank you
51:31for coming to Hybern to get me."
51:34He pulled at the moss beside him, jaw
51:36tight.
51:37"It was a trap. What I thought we were
51:40to do there,
51:42it did not turn out that way."
51:44It was an effort not to bare my teeth,
51:47but I walked to him, taking up a place
51:49at his side against the wide trunk of
51:51the tree.
51:53"This situation is terrible," I said,
51:56and it was the truth.
51:58A low snort.
51:59I knocked my knee against his.
52:01"Don't let Jurian bait you. He's doing
52:04it to feel out any weaknesses between
52:06us."
52:07"I know."
52:08I turned my face to him, resting my knee
52:11against his in silent demand.
52:13"Why?" I asked. "Why does Hybern want to
52:16do this, beyond some horrible desire for
52:19conquest?
52:20What drives him, his people? Hatred?
52:24Arrogance?"
52:25Lucien finally looked at me. The
52:27intricate pieces and carvings on the
52:29metal eye much more dazzling up close.
52:33"Do you Bryanna and Dagdan shoved
52:35through the bushes, frowning to find us
52:37sitting there.
52:39But it was Jurian, right on their heels,
52:41as if he'd been divulging the details of
52:43his surveying, who smiled at the sight
52:45of us, knee-to-knee and nearly
52:47nose-to-nose.
52:49"Careful, Lucien," the warrior sneered.
52:52"You see what happens to males who touch
52:54the High Lord's belongings."
52:56Lucien snarled, but I shot him a warning
52:59glare. "Point proven," I said silently.
53:03And despite Jurian, despite the sneering
53:05royals, a corner of Lucien's mouth
53:08tugged upward.
53:12Ianthe was waiting at the stables when
53:14we returned. She'd made her grand
53:16arrival at the end of breakfast hours
53:18before, breezing into the dining room
53:20when the sun was shining in shafts of
53:22pure gold through the windows.
53:25I had no doubt she'd planned the timing,
53:27just as she had planned the stop in the
53:29middle of one of those sunbeams, angled
53:31so her hair glowed and the jewel atop
53:34her head burned with blue fire.
53:36I would have titled the painting Model
53:38Piety.
53:40After she'd been briefly introduced by
53:42Tamlin, she'd mostly cooed over Jurian,
53:45who had only scowled at her like some
53:47insect buzzing in his ear.
53:50Dagdan and Brannagh had listened to her
53:51fawning with enough boredom that I was
53:54starting to wonder if the two of them
53:55perhaps preferred no one's company but
53:57each other's in whatever unholy
54:00capacity.
54:01Not a blink of interest toward the
54:03beauty who often made males and females
54:05stop to gape.
54:07Perhaps any sort of physical passion had
54:09long ago been drained away alongside
54:12their souls.
54:14So, the Hybern royals and Jurian had
54:16tolerated Ianthe for about a minute
54:18before they'd found their food more
54:20interesting.
54:21A slight that no doubt explained why she
54:23had decided to meet us here, awaiting
54:26our return as we rode in.
54:28It was my first time on a horse in
54:30months, and I was stiff enough that I
54:32could barely move as the party
54:34dismounted.
54:35I gave Lucien a subtle pleading look,
54:38and he barely hid his smirk as he
54:40sauntered over to me.
54:42Our dispersing party watched as he
54:43braced my waist in his broad hands, and
54:46easily hefted me off the horse, none
54:48more closely than Ianthe.
54:51I only patted Lucien on the shoulder in
54:53thanks. Ever the courtier, he bowed
54:55back.
54:57It was hard sometimes to remember to
54:59hate him, to remember the game I was
55:01already playing.
55:03Ianthe trailed, "A successful journey, I
55:06hope?" I jerked my chin toward the
55:08royals.
55:10"They seem pleased." Indeed, whatever
55:12they'd been looking for, they'd found
55:14agreeable. I hadn't dared ask too many
55:16prying questions, not yet. Ianthe bowed
55:20her head. "Thank the Cauldron for that."
55:23"What do you want?" Lucien said a shade
55:26too flatly.
55:27She frowned but lifted her chin, folding
55:30her hands before her as she said,
55:32"We're to have a party in honor of our
55:34guests and to coincide with the summer
55:37solstice in a few days,
55:39I wished to speak to Feyre about it. A
55:42two-faced smile, unless you have an
55:44objection to that.
55:46"He doesn't," I answered, before Lucien
55:49could say something he'd regret.
55:51"Give me an hour to eat and change, and
55:53I'll meet you in the study."
55:54Perhaps a tinge more assertive than I'd
55:56once been, but she nodded all the same.
55:59I linked my elbow with Lucien's and
56:01steered him away.
56:03"See you soon," I told her, and felt her
56:06gaze on us as we walked from the dim
56:07stables and into the bright midday
56:09light.
56:11His body was taut, near trembling.
56:14"What happened between you?" I hissed,
56:17when we were lost among the hedges and
56:18gravel paths of the garden.
56:21"It's not worth repeating."
56:23"When I was taken," I ventured, almost
56:26stumbling on the word, almost saying
56:28left.
56:30"Did she and Tamlin I was not faking the
56:33twisting low in my gut.
56:35"No," he said hoarsely. "No.
56:38When Callanmay came along, he refused.
56:41He flat-out refused to participate. I
56:44replaced him in the rite, but
56:46I'd forgotten. Forgotten about Callanmay
56:49and the rite. I did a mental tally of
56:52the days.
56:53No wonder I'd forgotten. I'd been in
56:55that cabin in the mountains with Rhys
56:57buried in me.
56:59Perhaps we'd generated our own magic
57:01that night.
57:02But Lucien,
57:04"You took Ianthe into that cave on
57:06Callanmay?"
57:08He wouldn't meet my gaze.
57:10"She insisted. Tamlin was
57:13Things were bad, Feyre. I went in his
57:16stead, and I did my duty to the court. I
57:19went of my own free will, and
57:22we completed the rite."
57:25No wonder she'd backed off him. She'd
57:27gotten what she wanted.
57:29"Please don't tell Elain," he said,
57:31"when we
57:32when we find her again." He amended.
57:36He might have completed the Great Rite
57:37with Ianthe of his own free will, but he
57:40certainly hadn't enjoyed it. Some line
57:43had been blurred, badly.
57:45And my heart shifted a bit in my chest
57:47as I said to him with no guile
57:49whatsoever,
57:51"I won't tell anyone unless you say so."
57:54The weight of that jeweled knife and
57:56belt seemed to grow.
57:58I wish I had been there to stop it. I
58:00should have been there to stop it.
58:02I meant every word.
58:04Lucien squeezed our linked arms as we
58:06rounded a hedge, the house rising up
58:09before us.
58:11"You are a better friend to me, Feyre,"
58:13he said quietly,
58:15"than I ever was to you."
58:20Alice frowned at the two dresses hanging
58:22from the armoire door, her long brown
58:24fingers smoothing over the chiffon and
58:26silk.
58:27"I don't know if the waist can be taken
58:29out," she said without peering back at
58:31where I sat on the edge of the bed. "We
58:33took so much of it in that there's not
58:35much fabric left to play with.
58:38You might very well need to order new
58:40ones."
58:41She faced me then, running an eye over
58:43my robed body.
58:45I knew what she saw, what lies and
58:47poisoned smiles couldn't hide.
58:50I had become wraith-thin while living
58:52here after Amarantha.
58:54Yet for all Rhys had done to harm me,
58:56I'd gained back the weight I'd lost, put
58:58on muscle, and discarded the sickly
59:00pallor in favor of sun-kissed skin.
59:04For a woman who had been tortured and
59:05tormented for months, I looked
59:07remarkably well.
59:09Our eyes held across the room, the
59:12silence hewn only by the humming of the
59:14few remaining servants in the hallway,
59:16busy with preparations for the solstice
59:18tomorrow morning.
59:20I'd spent the past two days playing the
59:22pretty pet, allowed into meetings with
59:25the Hybern royals mostly because I
59:27remained quiet.
59:29They were as cautious as we were,
59:31hedging Tamlin and Lucien's questions
59:33about the movements of their armies,
59:35their foreign allies, and other allies
59:37within Prythian. The meetings went
59:39nowhere as all they wanted to know was
59:42information about our own forces and
59:44about the Night Court.
59:47I fed Dagdan and Branna details both
59:49true and false, mixing them together
59:51seamlessly.
59:52I laid out the Illyrian host amongst the
59:54mountains and steps, but selected the
59:57strongest clan as their weakest.
59:59I mentioned the efficiency of those blue
1:00:01stones from Hybern against Cassian's and
1:00:03Azriel's power, but failed to mention
1:00:06how easily they'd worked around them.
1:00:09Any questions I couldn't evade, I
1:00:11feigned memory loss or trauma too great
1:00:13to bear recalling.
1:00:15But for all my lying and maneuvering,
1:00:18the royals were too guarded to reveal
1:00:19much of their own information. And for
1:00:22all my careful expressions, Iles seemed
1:00:24the only one who noted the tiny tells
1:00:26that even I couldn't control.
1:00:30"Do you think there are any gowns that
1:00:31will fit for solstice?" I said casually
1:00:34as her silence continued.
1:00:36"The pink and green ones fit, but I've
1:00:38worn them thrice already."
1:00:40"You never cared for such things." Iles
1:00:43said, clicking her tongue.
1:00:45"Am I not allowed to change my mind?"
1:00:48Those dark eyes narrowed slightly, but
1:00:50Iles yanked open the armoire doors, the
1:00:52dresses swaying with it, and riffled
1:00:55through its dark interior.
1:00:57"You could wear this." She held up an
1:00:59outfit.
1:01:01A set of turquoise Night Court clothes,
1:01:03cut so similarly to Amren's preferred
1:01:05fashion, dangled from her spindly
1:01:07fingers.
1:01:09My heart lurched.
1:01:10"That
1:01:11Why
1:01:12Words stumbled out of me, bulky and
1:01:15slippery, and I silenced myself with a
1:01:17sharp yank on my inner leash. I
1:01:19straightened.
1:01:21"I have never known you to be cruel,
1:01:22Alice. A snort. She chucked the clothes
1:01:26back into the armoire.
1:01:28Tamlin shredded the two other sets.
1:01:30Missed this one because it was in the
1:01:31wrong drawer.
1:01:33I wove a mental thread into the hallway
1:01:35to ensure no one was listening.
1:01:38He was upset. I wish he'd destroyed that
1:01:40pair, too.
1:01:42I was there that day, you know. Alice
1:01:45said, folding her spindly arms across
1:01:47her chest. I saw the Morgan arrive. Saw
1:01:51her reach into that cocoon of power and
1:01:53pick you up like a child.
1:01:55I begged her to take you out.
1:01:58My swallow wasn't feigned.
1:02:00I never told him that. Never told any of
1:02:03them. I let them think you'd been
1:02:05abducted, but you clung to her and she
1:02:08was willing to slaughter all of us for
1:02:10what had happened.
1:02:12I don't know why you'd assume that.
1:02:15I tugged the edges of my silk robe
1:02:16tighter around me.
1:02:18Servants talk, and under the mountain, I
1:02:22never heard of or saw Rhysand laying a
1:02:24hand on a servant. Guards, Amarantha's
1:02:27cronies, the people he was ordered to
1:02:29kill, yes, but never the meek. Never
1:02:33those unable to defend themselves.
1:02:36He's a monster.
1:02:38They say you came back different. Came
1:02:40back wrong. A crow's laugh. I never
1:02:44bothered to tell them I think you came
1:02:45back right. Came back right at last.
1:02:49A precipice yawned open before me.
1:02:52Lines. There were lines here, and my
1:02:55survival and that of Prythian depended
1:02:57upon navigating them.
1:02:59I rose from the bed, hands shaking
1:03:01slightly.
1:03:02But then Alice said,
1:03:04"My cousin works in the palace at
1:03:06Adriata."
1:03:08Summer Court. Alice had originally been
1:03:10from the Summer Court and had fled here
1:03:13with her two nephews after her sister
1:03:14had been brutally murdered during
1:03:16Amarantha's reign.
1:03:18Servants in that palace are not meant to
1:03:20be seen or heard, but they see and hear
1:03:23plenty when no one believes they're
1:03:25present.
1:03:27She was my friend. She had helped me at
1:03:29great risk under the mountain, had stood
1:03:31by me in the months after.
1:03:33But if she jeopardized everything?
1:03:36She said you visited and that you were
1:03:38healthy and laughing and happy.
1:03:42It was a lie. He made me act that way.
1:03:45The wobble in my voice didn't take much
1:03:47to summon. A knowing crooked smile.
1:03:51If you say so.
1:03:52I do say so.
1:03:54Alice pulled out a dress of creamy
1:03:56white.
1:03:57You never got to wear this one. I had it
1:03:59ordered for after your wedding day.
1:04:02It wasn't exactly bride-like, but rather
1:04:05pure, clean, the kind of gown I'd have
1:04:08resented when I returned from under the
1:04:10mountain, desperate to avoid any
1:04:12comparison to my ruined soul.
1:04:15But now,
1:04:16I held Alice's stare and wondered which
1:04:19of my plans she'd deciphered.
1:04:21Alice whispered,
1:04:23"I will only say this once.
1:04:26Whatever you plan to do, I beg you,
1:04:29leave my boys out of it. Take whatever
1:04:32retribution you desire, but please spare
1:04:35them."
1:04:36"I would never," I almost began, but I
1:04:39only shook my head, knotting my brows,
1:04:42utterly confused and distressed.
1:04:45All I want is to settle back into life
1:04:47here,
1:04:48to heal,
1:04:49heal the land of the corruption and
1:04:51darkness spreading across it.
1:04:53Alice seemed to understand it, too. She
1:04:56set the dress on the armoire door,
1:04:58airing out the loose shining skirts.
1:05:01"Wear this on solstice," she said
1:05:03quietly.
1:05:05So I did.
1:05:10Chapter 4
1:05:13Summer solstice was exactly as I had
1:05:15remembered. Streamers and ribbons and
1:05:17garlands of flowers everywhere. Casks of
1:05:20ale and wine hauled out to the foothills
1:05:22surrounding the estate. High fae and
1:05:25lesser fairies alike flocking to the
1:05:26celebrations.
1:05:28But what had not existed here a year ago
1:05:31was Ianthe.
1:05:33"The celebrating would be sacrilege,"
1:05:34she intoned, "if we did not give thanks
1:05:37first." So we all were up 2 hours before
1:05:40the dawn, bleary-eyed and none of us too
1:05:42keen to endure her ceremony as the sun
1:05:45crested the horizon on the longest day
1:05:47of the year.
1:05:48I wondered if Tarquin had to weather
1:05:50such tedious rituals in his shining
1:05:52palace by the sea.
1:05:54Wondered what sort of celebrations would
1:05:55occur in Adriata today with the High
1:05:58Lord of Summer who had come so very
1:06:00close to being a friend.
1:06:02As far as I knew, despite the murmurings
1:06:05between servants, Tarquin still had
1:06:07never sent word to Tamlin about the
1:06:09visit Reese, Amren, and I had made.
1:06:12What did the Summer Lord now think of my
1:06:13changed circumstances?
1:06:16I had little doubt Tarquin had heard,
1:06:18and I prayed he stayed out of it until
1:06:20my work here was finished.
1:06:23Alis had found me a luxurious white
1:06:25velvet cloak for the brisk ride into the
1:06:27hills, and Tamlin had lifted me onto a
1:06:29moon-pale mare with wildflowers woven
1:06:32into her silver mane.
1:06:34If I had wanted to paint a picture of
1:06:35serene purity, it would have been the
1:06:38image I cast that morning. My hair
1:06:40braided above my head, a crown of white
1:06:43hawthorn blossoms upon it. I dabbed
1:06:45rouge onto my cheeks and lips, a slight
1:06:47hint of color like the first blush of
1:06:50spring across a winter landscape.
1:06:53As our procession arrived at the hill, a
1:06:55gathered crowd of hundreds already atop
1:06:58it, all eyes turned to me.
1:07:01But I kept my gaze ahead to where Ianthe
1:07:03stood before a rudimentary stone altar
1:07:05bedecked in flowers and the first fruits
1:07:08and grains of summer.
1:07:10The hood was off her pale blue robe for
1:07:12once, the circlet now resting directly
1:07:14atop her golden head.
1:07:16I smiled at her, my mare obediently
1:07:19pausing at the northern arc of the half
1:07:21circle that the crowd had formed around
1:07:23the hill's edge and Ianthe's altar.
1:07:26And I wonder if Ianthe could spy the
1:07:28wolf grinning beneath.
1:07:30Tamlin helped me off the horse, the gray
1:07:33light of predawn shimmering along the
1:07:35golden threads in his green jacket. I
1:07:37forced myself to meet his eyes as he set
1:07:40me on the soft grass, aware of every
1:07:42other stare upon us.
1:07:44The memory gleamed in his gaze, in the
1:07:47way his gaze dipped to my mouth.
1:07:49A year ago he had kissed me on this day.
1:07:52A year ago I danced amongst these
1:07:55people, carefree and joyous for the
1:07:57first time in my life and had believed
1:07:59it was the happiest I'd ever been and
1:08:01ever would be. I gave him a little shy
1:08:04smile and took the arm he extended.
1:08:07Together we crossed the grass toward
1:08:09Ianthe's stone altar, the Highborn
1:08:11royals, Jurian and Lucien trailing
1:08:13behind.
1:08:15I wondered if Tamlin was also
1:08:17remembering another day all those months
1:08:19ago when I'd worn a different white
1:08:21gown, when there had also been flowers
1:08:23strewn about.
1:08:25When my mate had rescued me after I
1:08:27decided not to go through with the
1:08:28wedding, some fundamental part of me
1:08:31knowing it wasn't right.
1:08:33I had believed I didn't deserve it,
1:08:35hadn't wanted to burden Tamlin for an
1:08:37eternity with someone as broken as I'd
1:08:39been at the time.
1:08:40And Rhys?
1:08:42Rhys would have let me marry him,
1:08:44believing me to be happy, wanting me to
1:08:46be happy even if it killed him. But the
1:08:49moment I had said no, he had saved me,
1:08:52helped me save myself.
1:08:55I glanced sidelong at Tamlin,
1:08:57but he was studying my hand braced on
1:08:59his arm, the empty finger where that
1:09:01ring had once perched.
1:09:04What did he make of it? Where did he
1:09:06think that ring had gone if Lucien had
1:09:08hidden the evidence?
1:09:10For a heartbeat, I pitied him.
1:09:13Pitied that not only Lucien had lied to
1:09:15him, but Alice as well.
1:09:17How many others had seen the truth of my
1:09:19suffering and tried to spare him from
1:09:22it?
1:09:22Seen my suffering and done nothing to
1:09:24help me.
1:09:26Tamlin and I paused before the altar,
1:09:29Ianthe offering us a serene regal nod.
1:09:33The Hybern royals shifted on their feet,
1:09:35not bothering to hide their impatience.
1:09:38Breanna had made barely veiled
1:09:39complaints about the solstice at dinner
1:09:41last night, declaring that in Hybern
1:09:43they did not bother with such odious
1:09:45things and got on with the revelry.
1:09:48And implying in her way that soon
1:09:51neither would we.
1:09:53I ignored the royals as Ianthe lifted
1:09:55her hands and called to the crowd behind
1:09:57us.
1:09:58A blessed solstice to us all.
1:10:02Then began an endless string of prayers
1:10:04and rituals, her prettiest young
1:10:06acolytes assisting with the pouring of
1:10:08sacred wine, with the blessing of the
1:10:10harvest goods on the altar, with
1:10:12beseeching the sun to rise. A lovely
1:10:15rehearsed little number. Lucien was half
1:10:17asleep behind me.
1:10:19But I'd gone over the ceremony with
1:10:21Ianthe and knew what was coming when she
1:10:23lifted the sacred wine and intoned,
1:10:26"As the light is strongest today, let it
1:10:29drive out unwanted darkness. Let it
1:10:31banish the black stain of evil."
1:10:34Jab after jab at my mate, my home, but I
1:10:38nodded along with her.
1:10:40"Would Princess Breanna and Prince
1:10:42Dagdan do us the honor of imbibing this
1:10:45blessed wine?"
1:10:46The crowd shifted. The Hybern royals
1:10:49blinked, frowning to each other.
1:10:51But I stepped aside, smiling prettily at
1:10:54them and gesturing to the altar.
1:10:56They opened their mouths, no doubt to
1:10:58refuse, but Ianthe would not be denied.
1:11:02"Drink, and let our new allies become
1:11:04friends," she declared. "Drink, and wash
1:11:08away the endless night of the year."
1:11:11The two daymari were likely testing that
1:11:13cup for poison through whatever magic
1:11:15and training they possessed, but I kept
1:11:17the bland smile on my face as they
1:11:20finally approached the altar, and
1:11:22Bryanna accepted the outstretched silver
1:11:24cup.
1:11:25They each barely had a sip before they
1:11:27made to step back, but Ianthe cooed at
1:11:30them, insisting they come behind the
1:11:32altar to witness our ceremony at her
1:11:34side.
1:11:35I had made sure she knew precisely how
1:11:38disgusted they were with her rituals,
1:11:40how they would do their best to stomp
1:11:42out her usefulness as a leader of her
1:11:44people once they arrived. She now seemed
1:11:46inclined to convert them.
1:11:49More prayers and rituals until Tamlin
1:11:51was summoned to the other side of the
1:11:53altar to light a candle for the souls
1:11:55extinguished in the past year to now
1:11:58bring them back into the light's embrace
1:12:00when the sun rose.
1:12:01Pink began to stain the clouds behind
1:12:03them.
1:12:05Jurian was also called forward to recite
1:12:07one final prayer I'd requested Ianthe
1:12:09add in honor of the warriors who fought
1:12:12for our safety each day.
1:12:14And then Lucien and I were standing
1:12:16alone in the circle of grass, the altar
1:12:18and horizon before us, the crowd at our
1:12:21backs and sides. From the rigidity of
1:12:24his posture, the dart of his gaze over
1:12:26the sight, I knew he was now running
1:12:28through the prayers and how I had worked
1:12:30with Ianthe on the ceremony, how he and
1:12:33I remained on this side of the line
1:12:35right as the sun was about to break over
1:12:37the world, and the others had been
1:12:39maneuvered away.
1:12:41Ianthe stepped toward the hill's edge,
1:12:43her golden hair tumbling freely down her
1:12:46back as she lifted her arms to the sky.
1:12:49The location was intentional, as was the
1:12:51positioning of her arms.
1:12:54She'd made the same gesture on winter
1:12:56solstice, standing in the precise spot
1:12:58where the sun would rise between her
1:13:00upraised arms, filling them with light.
1:13:03Her acolytes had discreetly marked the
1:13:05place in the grass with a carved stone.
1:13:07Slowly, the golden disc of the sun broke
1:13:10over the hazy greens and blues of the
1:13:12horizon. Light filled the world, clear
1:13:15and strong, spearing right for us.
1:13:19Ianthe's back arched, her body a mere
1:13:21vessel for the solstice's light to fill,
1:13:23and what I could see of her face was
1:13:25already limned in pious ecstasy.
1:13:28The sun rose, a held gilded note echoing
1:13:31through the land. The crowd began to
1:13:33murmur,
1:13:34then cry out. Not at Ianthe, but at me.
1:13:39At me, resplendent and pure in white,
1:13:42beginning to glow with the light of day
1:13:44as the sun's path flowed directly over
1:13:46me instead.
1:13:48No one had bothered to confirm or even
1:13:50notice that Ianthe's marker stone had
1:13:51moved 5 ft to the right, too busy with
1:13:54parading a rival to spy a phantom wind
1:13:57slide it through the grass.
1:13:59It took Ianthe longer than anyone else
1:14:01to look, to see that the sun's power was
1:14:03not filling her, blessing her.
1:14:06I released the damper on the power that
1:14:08I had unleashed in Hybern, my body
1:14:11turning incandescent as light shone
1:14:13through, pure as day, pure as starlight.
1:14:17"Cursebreaker," some murmured.
1:14:20"Blessed," others whispered. I made a
1:14:22show of looking surprised, surprised and
1:14:25yet accepting of the Cauldron's choice.
1:14:28Tamlin's face was taut with shock, the
1:14:30Hybern royals nothing short of baffled.
1:14:33But I turned to Lucien, my light
1:14:35radiating so brightly that it bounced
1:14:37off his metal eye, a friend beseeching
1:14:39another for help. I reached a hand
1:14:42toward him.
1:14:43Beyond us, I could feel Ianthe
1:14:45scrambling to regain control, to find
1:14:48some way to spin it.
1:14:50Perhaps Lucien could, too, for he took
1:14:52my hand and then knelt upon one knee in
1:14:54the grass, pressing my fingers to his
1:14:57brow.
1:14:58Like stalks of wheat in a wind, the
1:15:00others fell to their knees as well.
1:15:03For in all of her preening ceremonies
1:15:05and rituals, never had Ianthe revealed
1:15:07any sign of power or blessing.
1:15:10But Feyre curse-breaker, who had led
1:15:12Prythian from tyranny and darkness,
1:15:15blessed, holy, undimming before evil.
1:15:19I let my glow spread until it, too,
1:15:22rippled from Lucien's bowed form, a
1:15:24knight before his queen.
1:15:26When I looked to Ianthe and smiled
1:15:28again, I let a little bit of the wolf
1:15:31show.
1:15:34The festivities, at least, remained the
1:15:36same. Once the uproar and awe had ebbed,
1:15:40once my own glow had vanished when the
1:15:42sun crested higher than my head, we made
1:15:45our way to the nearby hills and fields,
1:15:47where those who had not attended the
1:15:48ceremony had already heard about my
1:15:50small miracle.
1:15:52I kept close to Lucien, who was inclined
1:15:55to indulge me, as everyone seemed to be
1:15:57torn between joy and awe, question and
1:16:00concern.
1:16:01Ianthe spent the next 6 hours trying to
1:16:04explain what had happened.
1:16:06The Cauldron had blessed her chosen
1:16:08friend, she told whoever would listen.
1:16:10The sun had altered its very path to
1:16:13show how glad it was for my return.
1:16:15Only her acolytes really paid attention,
1:16:18and half of them appeared only mildly
1:16:20interested.
1:16:21Tamlin, however, seemed the wariest, as
1:16:25if the blessing had somehow upset me, as
1:16:27if he remembered that same light in
1:16:29Hybern and could not figure out why it
1:16:31disturbed him so.
1:16:33But duty had him fielding thanks and
1:16:35good wishes from his subjects, warriors,
1:16:37and the lesser lords, leaving me free to
1:16:40wander.
1:16:41I was stopped every now and then by
1:16:43fervent adoring fairies who wished to
1:16:45touch my hand, to weep a bit over me.
1:16:48Once, I would have cringed and winced.
1:16:51Now, I received their thanks and prayers
1:16:53beatifically, thanking them, smiling at
1:16:56them.
1:16:57Some of it was genuine. I had no quarrel
1:17:00with the people of these lands who had
1:17:02suffered alongside the rest. None.
1:17:05But the courtiers and centuries who
1:17:07sought me out, I put on a better show
1:17:09for them. "Cauldron blessed," they
1:17:12called me. "An honor," I merely replied.
1:17:15On and on I repeated those words through
1:17:18breakfast and lunch until I returned to
1:17:21the house to freshen up and take a
1:17:23moment for myself.
1:17:25In the privacy of my room, I set my
1:17:27crown of flowers on the dressing table
1:17:29and smiled slightly at the eye tattooed
1:17:32into my right palm.
1:17:34"The longest day of the year," I said
1:17:36into the bond, sending along flickers of
1:17:39all that had occurred atop that hill.
1:17:41I wish I could spend it with you."
1:17:44He would have enjoyed my performance,
1:17:46would have laughed himself hoarse
1:17:47afterward at the expression on Ianthe's
1:17:49face.
1:17:50I finished washing up and was about to
1:17:52head out into the hills again when
1:17:54Rhysand's voice filled my mind.
1:17:57"It would be an honor," he said,
1:17:59laughter in every word, "to spend even a
1:18:01moment in the company of Feyre, cauldron
1:18:04blessed."
1:18:05I chuckled. The words were distant,
1:18:08strained. "Keep it quick."
1:18:10I had to keep it quick or risk exposure,
1:18:13and more than anything, I needed to ask,
1:18:15to know,
1:18:17"Is everyone all right?"
1:18:19I waited, counting the minutes. "Yes, as
1:18:22well as we can be."
1:18:24"When do you come home to me?"
1:18:26Each word was quieter than the last.
1:18:29"Soon," I promised him. "Hybern is here.
1:18:33I'll be done soon."
1:18:34He didn't reply, and I waited another
1:18:37few minutes before I again donned my
1:18:39flower crown and strode down the stairs.
1:18:43As I emerged into the bedecked garden,
1:18:45though, Rhysand's faint voice filled my
1:18:47head once more.
1:18:49I wish I could spend today with you,
1:18:50too.
1:18:52The words wrapped a fist around my
1:18:54heart, and I forced them from my mind as
1:18:56I returned to the party in the hills, my
1:18:58steps heavier than they'd been when I
1:19:00floated into the house.
1:19:02But lunch had been cleared away, and
1:19:04dancing had begun.
1:19:06I saw him waiting on the outskirts of
1:19:08one of the circles, observing every move
1:19:10I took.
1:19:11I glanced between the grass and the
1:19:13crowd and the cluster of musicians
1:19:15coaxing such lively music from drums and
1:19:18fiddles and pipes as I approached, no
1:19:20more than a shy, hesitant doe.
1:19:23Once, those same sounds had shaken me
1:19:26awake, had made me dance and dance.
1:19:29I supposed they were now little more
1:19:30than weapons in my arsenal. As I stopped
1:19:33before Tamlin, lowered my eyelashes, and
1:19:35asked softly,
1:19:37"Will you dance with me?"
1:19:39Relief, happiness, and a slight edge of
1:19:42concern. "Yes," he breathed. "Yes, of
1:19:45course."
1:19:47So I let him lead me into the swift
1:19:48dance, spinning and tilting me, people
1:19:51gathering to cheer and clap. Dance after
1:19:54dance after dance until sweat was
1:19:57running down my back as I worked to keep
1:19:59up, keep that smile on my face, to
1:20:01remember to laugh when my hands were
1:20:03within strangling distance of his
1:20:05throat.
1:20:07The music eventually shifted into
1:20:08something slower, and Tamlin eased us
1:20:11into the melody.
1:20:12"When others had found their own
1:20:14partners more interesting to watch," he
1:20:16murmured,
1:20:17"this morning,
1:20:19are you all right?"
1:20:21My head snapped up. "Yes, I
1:20:24I don't know what that was, but yes.
1:20:27Is Ianthe mad?"
1:20:30"I don't know. She didn't see it coming.
1:20:33I don't think she handles surprises very
1:20:35well.
1:20:36I should apologize. His eyes flashed.
1:20:39What for? Perhaps it was a blessing.
1:20:42Magic still surprises me. If she's
1:20:45angry, it's her problem.
1:20:47I made a show of considering, then
1:20:49nodded. Pressed closer, loathing every
1:20:52place where our bodies touched. I didn't
1:20:55know how Rhys had endured it, endured
1:20:57Amarantha, for five decades.
1:21:00You look beautiful today, Tamlin said.
1:21:04Thank you. I made myself appear up into
1:21:07his face.
1:21:08Lucien.
1:21:09Lucien told me that you didn't complete
1:21:11the right at Callanmay.
1:21:13That you refused. And you let Ianthe
1:21:16take him into that cave instead. His
1:21:19throat bobbed. I couldn't stomach it.
1:21:22And yet you could stomach making a deal
1:21:24with Hybern, as if I were a stolen item
1:21:27to be returned.
1:21:28Maybe this morning was not just a
1:21:30blessing for me, I offered. A stroke of
1:21:33his hand down my back was his only
1:21:35reply.
1:21:37That was all we said for the next three
1:21:39dances, until hunger dragged me toward
1:21:41the tables where dinner had now been
1:21:43laid out. I let him fill a plate for me,
1:21:46let him serve me himself as we found a
1:21:48spot under a twisted old oak, and
1:21:50watched the dancing and the music.
1:21:53I nearly asked if it was worth it, if
1:21:55giving up this sort of peace was worth
1:21:57it in order to have me back. For Hybern
1:22:00would come here, use these lands, and
1:22:03there would be no more singing and
1:22:04dancing, not once they arrived.
1:22:08But I kept quiet as the sunlight faded
1:22:10and night finally fell.
1:22:12The stars winked into existence, dim and
1:22:15small above the blazing fires.
1:22:18I watched them through the long hours of
1:22:20celebrating, and could have sworn that
1:22:22they kept me company. My silent and
1:22:25stalwart friends.
1:22:31Chapter 5
1:22:33I crawled back to the manor 2 hours
1:22:35after midnight, too exhausted to last
1:22:38until dawn.
1:22:39Especially when I noted the way Tamlin
1:22:41looked at me, remembering that dawn last
1:22:43year when he'd let me away and kissed me
1:22:46as the sun rose.
1:22:48I asked Lucien to escort me, and he'd
1:22:50been more than happy to do so, given
1:22:52that his own status as a mated male made
1:22:54him uninterested in any sort of female
1:22:56company these days.
1:22:58And given that Ianthe had been trying to
1:23:00corner him all day to ask about what had
1:23:03happened at the ceremony.
1:23:05I changed into my nightgown, a small
1:23:07lacy thing I'd once worn for Tamlin's
1:23:09enjoyment, and now was glad to dawn
1:23:12thanks to the day's sweat still clinging
1:23:13to my skin, and flopped into bed.
1:23:17For nearly half an hour, I kicked at the
1:23:19sheets, tossing and turning, thrashing.
1:23:23The Attor, the Weaver, my sisters being
1:23:26thrown into the Cauldron, all of them
1:23:28twined and eddied around me.
1:23:30I let them.
1:23:32Most of the others were still
1:23:33celebrating when I yelped, a sharp short
1:23:36cry that had me bouncing from the bed.
1:23:38My heart thundered along my veins, my
1:23:40bones, as I cracked open the door,
1:23:43sweating and haggard, and padded across
1:23:45the hall.
1:23:46Lucien answered on the second knock.
1:23:49"I heard you. What's wrong?" He scanned
1:23:52me, russet eye wide as he noted my
1:23:54disheveled
1:23:55my sweaty nightgown.
1:23:58I swallowed, a silent question on my
1:24:00face, and he nodded, retreating into the
1:24:02room to let me inside. Bare from the
1:24:05waist up, he'd managed to haul on a pair
1:24:07of pants before opening the door, and
1:24:10hastily buttoned them as I strode past.
1:24:13His room had been bedecked in Autumn
1:24:15Court colors, the only tribute to his
1:24:17home he'd ever let show, and I surveyed
1:24:19the night-dark space, the rumpled
1:24:21bedsheets. He perched on the rolled arm
1:24:24of a large chair before the blackened
1:24:26fire, watching me wring my hands in the
1:24:28center of the crimson carpet.
1:24:31"I dream about it," I rasped. "Under the
1:24:34mountain."
1:24:35"And when I wake up I can't remember
1:24:37where I am."
1:24:39I lifted my now unmarked left arm before
1:24:41me.
1:24:42"I can't remember when I am." Truth and
1:24:46half a lie. I still dreamed of those
1:24:48horrible days, but no longer did they
1:24:50consume me. No longer did I run to the
1:24:52bathroom in the middle of the night to
1:24:54hurl my guts up.
1:24:56"What did you dream of tonight?" he
1:24:58asked quietly.
1:25:00I dragged my eyes to his, haunted and
1:25:03bleak.
1:25:04"She had me spiked to the wall
1:25:06like Claire Better, and the odor was"
1:25:10I shuddered, running my hands over my
1:25:12face.
1:25:13Lucien rose, stalking to me.
1:25:16The ripple of fear and pain at my own
1:25:18words masked my scent enough, masked my
1:25:20own power as my dark snares picked up a
1:25:23slight vibration in the house.
1:25:25Lucien paused half a foot from me.
1:25:28He didn't so much as object as I threw
1:25:29my arms around his neck, burying my face
1:25:32against his warm, bare chest.
1:25:35It was seawater from Tarquin's own gift
1:25:37that slipped from my eyes, down my face,
1:25:40and onto his golden skin.
1:25:42Lucien loosed a heavy sigh and slid an
1:25:44arm around my waist, the other threading
1:25:46through my hair to cradle my head.
1:25:49"I'm sorry," he murmured. "I'm sorry."
1:25:53He held me, stroking soothing lines down
1:25:56my back, and I calmed my weeping, those
1:25:59seawater tears drying up like wet sand
1:26:01in the sun.
1:26:03I lifted my head from his sculpted chest
1:26:05at last, my fingers digging into the
1:26:07hard muscles of his shoulders as I
1:26:09peered into his concerned face.
1:26:12I took deep, heaving breaths, my brows
1:26:15knotting and mouth parting as I What's
1:26:17going on?
1:26:19Lucien whipped his head toward the door.
1:26:21Tamlin stood there, face a mask of cold
1:26:24calm. The beginnings of claws glinted at
1:26:27his knuckles.
1:26:28We pushed away, too swiftly to be
1:26:30casual.
1:26:32I had a nightmare, I explained,
1:26:34straightening my nightgown. I
1:26:36I didn't want to wake the house.
1:26:39Tamlin was just staring at Lucien, whose
1:26:41mouth had tightened into a thin line as
1:26:43he marked those claws, still half-drawn.
1:26:47I had a nightmare, I repeated a bit
1:26:49sharply, gripping Tamlin's arm and
1:26:51leading him from the room before Lucien
1:26:53could so much as open his mouth.
1:26:56I closed the door, but could still feel
1:26:58Tamlin's attention fixed on the male
1:27:00behind it.
1:27:02He didn't sheath his claws, didn't
1:27:04summon them any further, either.
1:27:06I strode the few feet to my room,
1:27:09watching Tamlin assess the hall, the
1:27:11distance between my door and Lucien's.
1:27:14Good night, I said, and shut the door in
1:27:17Tamlin's face.
1:27:19I waited the 5 minutes it took Tamlin to
1:27:21decide not to kill Lucien,
1:27:24and then smiled.
1:27:26I wondered if Lucien had pieced it
1:27:27together, that I had known Tamlin would
1:27:30come to my room tonight after I had
1:27:32given him so many shy touches and
1:27:34glances today, that I had changed into
1:27:36my most indecent nightgown not for the
1:27:39heat, but so that when my invisible
1:27:41snares in the house informed me that
1:27:43Tamlin had finally worked up the nerve
1:27:45to come to my bedroom, I'd look the
1:27:47part.
1:27:48A feigned nightmare, the evidence set
1:27:51into place with my thrashed sheets. I
1:27:53left Lucien's door open, with him too
1:27:55distracted and unsuspecting of why I'd
1:27:58really be there to bother to shut it, or
1:28:00notice the shield of hard air I'd placed
1:28:02around the room so that he wouldn't hear
1:28:04or sense Tamlin as he arrived.
1:28:07Until Tamlin saw us there, limbs
1:28:10entwined, my nightgown askew, staring at
1:28:13each other so intently, so full of
1:28:15emotion that we'd either just been
1:28:17starting or finishing up.
1:28:19That we didn't even notice until Tamlin
1:28:21was right there, and that invisible
1:28:23shield vanished before he could sense
1:28:25it.
1:28:27"A nightmare," I told Tamlin.
1:28:29I was the nightmare.
1:28:31Praying on what Tamlin had feared from
1:28:33my very first days here.
1:28:35I had not forgotten that long ago fight
1:28:37he'd picked with Lucien, the warning
1:28:39he'd given him to stop flirting with me,
1:28:41to stay away. The fear that I'd
1:28:44preferred the red-haired lord over him,
1:28:46and that it would threaten every plan he
1:28:48had. "Back off," he'd told Lucien.
1:28:52I had no doubt Tamlin was now running
1:28:54through every look and conversation
1:28:56since then, every time Lucien had
1:28:58intervened on my behalf, both under the
1:29:00mountain and afterward,
1:29:02weighing how much that new mating bond
1:29:04with Elain held sway over his friend,
1:29:07considering how this very morning Lucien
1:29:10had knelt before me, swearing fealty to
1:29:12a newborn god, as if we had both been
1:29:15cauldron-blessed.
1:29:17I let myself smile for a moment longer,
1:29:20then dressed.
1:29:21There was more work to do.
1:29:27Chapter six.
1:29:29A set of keys to the estate gates had
1:29:31gone missing,
1:29:33but after last night's incident, Tamlin
1:29:35didn't appear to care.
1:29:37Breakfast was silent. The High Fae
1:29:39royals sullen at being kept waiting so
1:29:41long to see the second cleft in the
1:29:43wall, and Jurian, for once, too tired to
1:29:46do anything but shovel meat and eggs
1:29:48into his hateful mouth.
1:29:50Tamlin and Lucien, it seemed, had spoken
1:29:53before the meal,
1:29:54but the latter made a point to keep a
1:29:56healthy distance from me, to not look at
1:29:58or speak to me, as if still needing to
1:30:00convince Tamlin of our innocence.
1:30:03I debated asking Jurian outright if he'd
1:30:06stolen the keys from whatever guard had
1:30:07lost them.
1:30:09But the silence was a welcome reprieve.
1:30:12Until Ianthe breezed in, carefully
1:30:14avoiding acknowledging me, as if I was
1:30:17indeed the blinding sun that had been
1:30:18stolen from her.
1:30:21"I am sorry to interrupt your meal, but
1:30:23there is a matter to discuss, High
1:30:25Lord." Ianthe said, pale robes swirling
1:30:28at her feet as she halted halfway to the
1:30:30table.
1:30:31All of us perked up at that. Tamlin,
1:30:34brooding and snarly, demanded, "What is
1:30:37it?"
1:30:38She made a show of realizing the Hybern
1:30:40royals were present, listening.
1:30:43I tried not to snort at the
1:30:44oh-so-nervous glance she threw their
1:30:46way, then to Tamlin. The next words were
1:30:49no surprise whatsoever.
1:30:51"Perhaps we should wait until after the
1:30:53meal when you are alone." No doubt a
1:30:56power play to remind them that she did,
1:30:58in fact, have sway here with Tamlin.
1:31:01That Hybern, too, might want to remain
1:31:03on her good side, considering the
1:31:05information she bore.
1:31:07But I was cruel enough to say sweetly,
1:31:10"If we can trust our allies in Hybern to
1:31:12go to war with us, then we can trust
1:31:15them to use discretion.
1:31:16Go ahead, Ianthe."
1:31:19She didn't so much as look in my
1:31:20direction.
1:31:21But now, caught between outright insult
1:31:23and politeness,
1:31:25Tamlin weighed our company against
1:31:27Ianthe's posture and said,
1:31:29"Let's hear it."
1:31:31Her white throat bobbed.
1:31:33"There is
1:31:34My acolytes discovered that the land
1:31:36around my temple is dying."
1:31:40Jurian rolled his eyes and went back to
1:31:42his bacon. "Then tell the gardeners,"
1:31:45Breonna said, returning to her own food.
1:31:48Dagdan snickered into his cup of tea.
1:31:51"It is not a matter of gardening."
1:31:53Ianthe straightened. "It is a blight
1:31:55upon the land. Grass, root, bud, all of
1:31:59it, shriveled up and sickly. It reeks of
1:32:02the naga. It was an effort not to glance
1:32:05to Lucien to see if he also noticed the
1:32:07two eager gleam in her eye. Even Tamlin
1:32:10loosed a sigh, as if he saw it for what
1:32:12it was, an attempt to regain some
1:32:15ground, perhaps a scheme to poison the
1:32:17earth and then miraculously heal it.
1:32:20"There are other spots in the woods
1:32:22where things have died and are not
1:32:24coming back." Ianthe went on, pressing a
1:32:27silver-adorned hand to her chest.
1:32:30"I fear it's a warning that the naga are
1:32:32gathering and plan to act."
1:32:35Oh, I'd gotten under her skin. I'd been
1:32:37wondering what she'd do after
1:32:39yesterday's solstice, after I'd robbed
1:32:41her of her moment and power. But this,
1:32:44clever.
1:32:46I hid my smirk down deep and said
1:32:48gently, "Ianthe,
1:32:50perhaps it is a case for the
1:32:51groundskeepers."
1:32:53She stiffened, at last facing me.
1:32:56"You think you're playing the game." I
1:32:58itched to tell her, "but you have no
1:33:00idea that every you made last night and
1:33:03this morning were only steps I nudged
1:33:05you toward."
1:33:07I jerked my chin toward the royals, then
1:33:09Lucien.
1:33:10"We're heading out this afternoon to
1:33:12survey the wall,
1:33:13but if the problem remains when we
1:33:15return in a few days, I'll help you look
1:33:17into it."
1:33:19Those silver-ringed fingers curled into
1:33:21loose fists at her sides, but like the
1:33:23true viper she was, Ianthe said to
1:33:26Tamlin,
1:33:27"Will you be joining them, High Lord?"
1:33:30She looked to me and Lucien, the
1:33:32assessment too lingering to be casual.
1:33:35A faint, low headache was already
1:33:37forming, made worse with every word out
1:33:40of her mouth. I'd been up too late and
1:33:42had gotten too little sleep, and I
1:33:44needed my strength for the days ahead.
1:33:47"He will not," I said, cutting off
1:33:49Tamlin before he could reply.
1:33:51He set down his utensils.
1:33:54"I think I will."
1:33:56"I don't need an escort." Let him
1:33:58unravel the layers of defensiveness in
1:34:00that statement. Jurian snorted. Starting
1:34:03to doubt our good intentions, High Lord?
1:34:07Tamlin snarled at him. Careful.
1:34:09I placed a hand flat on the table.
1:34:12I'll be fine with Lucien and the
1:34:13centuries.
1:34:15Lucien seemed inclined to sink into his
1:34:17seat and disappear forever.
1:34:19I surveyed Dagdan and Brannagh and
1:34:21smiled a bit.
1:34:23I can defend myself. If it comes to
1:34:25that, I said to Tamlin.
1:34:28The Day Lord he smiled back at me. I
1:34:30hadn't felt another touch on my mental
1:34:32barriers or the ones I'd been working to
1:34:34keep around as many people here as
1:34:36possible.
1:34:37The constant use of my power was wearing
1:34:39on me, however. Being away from this
1:34:42place for four or five days would be a
1:34:44welcome relief.
1:34:46Especially as Ianthe murmured to Tamlin.
1:34:49Perhaps you should go, my friend.
1:34:52I waited. Waited for whatever nonsense
1:34:55was about to come out of that pouty
1:34:56mouth.
1:34:57You never know when the Night Court will
1:34:59attempt to snatch her away.
1:35:02I had a blink to debate my reaction. To
1:35:05opt for leaning back in my chair,
1:35:07shoulders curling inward, hauling up
1:35:09those images of Claire, of Rhys with
1:35:11those ash arrows through his wings. Any
1:35:14sort of way to dredge my scent in fear.
1:35:17Have you news? I whispered.
1:35:20Brannagh and Dagdan looked very
1:35:21interested at that. The priestess opened
1:35:24her mouth, but Jurian cut her off,
1:35:26drawling, "There is no news. Their
1:35:29borders are secure. Rhysand would be a
1:35:31fool to push his luck by coming here."
1:35:34I stared at my plate, the portrait of
1:35:36bowed terror.
1:35:38"A fool, yes." Ianthe countered, "but
1:35:41one with a vendetta." She faced Tamlin,
1:35:45the morning sun catching in the jewel
1:35:46atop her head.
1:35:48"Perhaps if you returned to him his
1:35:50family's wings, he might settle
1:35:53for a heartbeat. Silence rippled through
1:35:56me,
1:35:57followed by a wave of roaring that
1:35:58drowned out nearly every thought, every
1:36:01self-preserving instinct. I could barely
1:36:03hear over that bellowing in my blood, my
1:36:06bones,
1:36:07but the words, the offer, a cheap
1:36:10attempt at snaring me.
1:36:12I pretended not to hear, not to care,
1:36:15even as I waited and waited for Tamlin's
1:36:17reply.
1:36:19When Tamlin answered, his voice was low.
1:36:22"I burned them a long time ago."
1:36:25I could have sworn there was something
1:36:27like remorse, remorse and shame in his
1:36:29words.
1:36:31Ianthe only tsked.
1:36:33"Too bad. He might have paid handsomely
1:36:35for them."
1:36:36My limbs ached with the effort of not
1:36:38leaping over the table to smash her head
1:36:40into the marble floor.
1:36:42But I said to Tamlin, soothing and
1:36:45gentle,
1:36:46"I'll be fine out there."
1:36:48I touched his hand, brushing my thumb
1:36:50over the back of his palm, held his
1:36:52stare.
1:36:53"Let's not start down this road again."
1:36:56As I pulled away, Tamlin merely fixed
1:36:59Lucien with a look, any trace of that
1:37:01guilt gone. His claws slid free,
1:37:04embedding in the scar-flecked wood of
1:37:06his chair's arm.
1:37:07"Be careful."
1:37:09None of us pretended it was anything but
1:37:11a threat.
1:37:15It was a two-day ride, but took us only
1:37:17a day to get there with winnowing,
1:37:19walking, winnowing.
1:37:21We could manage a few miles at a time,
1:37:23but Dagdan was slower than I'd
1:37:25anticipated, given that he had to carry
1:37:27his sister and Jurian.
1:37:29I didn't fault him for it. With each of
1:37:32us bearing another, the drain was
1:37:33considerable.
1:37:35Lucien and I both bore a sentry, minor
1:37:38lords' sons who had been trained to be
1:37:40polite and watchful. Supplies, as a
1:37:42result, were limited, including tents.
1:37:46By the time we made it to the cleft in
1:37:48the wall, darkness was falling.
1:37:51The few supplies we'd hauled also had
1:37:53encumbered our winnowing through the
1:37:54world, and I let the sentries erect the
1:37:56tents for us, ever the lady keen to be
1:37:59waited on.
1:38:00Our dinner around the small fire was
1:38:02near silent, none of us bothering to
1:38:05speak save for Jurian, who questioned
1:38:07the sentries endlessly about their
1:38:09training. The twins retreated to their
1:38:11own tent after they'd picked at the meat
1:38:13sandwiches we'd packed, frowning at them
1:38:16as if they were full of maggots instead.
1:38:18And Jurian wandered off into the woods
1:38:20soon after, claiming he wanted a walk
1:38:23before he retired.
1:38:25I hauled myself into the canvas tent
1:38:27when the fire was dying out, the space
1:38:30barely big enough for Lucien and me to
1:38:32sleep shoulder to shoulder.
1:38:34His red hair gleamed in the faint
1:38:36firelight a moment later, as he shoved
1:38:39through the flaps and swore.
1:38:41Maybe I should sleep out there.
1:38:43I rolled my eyes. Please.
1:38:46A wary, considering glance as he knelt
1:38:48and removed his boots.
1:38:50You know Tamlin can be sensitive about
1:38:54things.
1:38:55He can also be a pain in my ass, I
1:38:57snapped, and slithered under the
1:38:59blankets. If you yield to him on every
1:39:01bit of paranoia and territorialism,
1:39:04you'll just make it worse.
1:39:06Lucien unbuttoned his jacket, but
1:39:08remained mostly dressed as he slid onto
1:39:10his sleeping roll.
1:39:12I think it's made worse because you two
1:39:15haven't
1:39:16I mean, you haven't, right?
1:39:19I stiffened, tugging the blanket higher
1:39:21onto my shoulders.
1:39:23No.
1:39:24I don't want to be touched like that.
1:39:26Not for a while.
1:39:29His silence was heavy, sad. I hated the
1:39:32lie, hated for how filthy it felt to
1:39:34wield it.
1:39:36I'm sorry. He said, and I wondered what
1:39:39else he was apologizing for as I faced
1:39:41him in the darkness of our tent.
1:39:44"Isn't there some way to get out of this
1:39:45deal with Hybern?" My words were barely
1:39:48louder than the murmuring embers
1:39:49outside.
1:39:51"I'm back. I'm safe. We could find some
1:39:54way around it."
1:39:55"No."
1:39:56"The King of Hybern crafted his bargain
1:39:58with Tamlin too cleverly, too clearly.
1:40:01Magic bound them. Magic will strike him
1:40:04if he does not allow Hybern into these
1:40:06lands."
1:40:08"In what way?"
1:40:09"Kill him?"
1:40:11Lucien's sigh ruffled my hair.
1:40:14"It will claim his own powers, maybe
1:40:16kill him."
1:40:17"Magic is all about balance. It's why he
1:40:20couldn't interfere with your bargain
1:40:21with Rhysand.
1:40:23Even the person who tries to sever the
1:40:24bargain faces consequences.
1:40:27If he'd kept you here, the magic that
1:40:29bound you to Rhys might have come to
1:40:31claim his life as payment for yours.
1:40:34Or the life of someone else he cared
1:40:36about.
1:40:37It's old magic. Old and strange. It's
1:40:41why we avoid bargains unless it's
1:40:42necessary. Even the scholars at the Day
1:40:45Court don't know how it works.
1:40:47Believe me, I've asked."
1:40:50"For me?"
1:40:51"You asked them for me?"
1:40:53"Yes."
1:40:54"I went last winter to inquire about
1:40:56breaking your bargain with Rhys."
1:40:59"Why didn't you tell me?"
1:41:01"I
1:41:02We didn't want to give you false hope,
1:41:04and we didn't dare let Rhysand get wind
1:41:06of what we were doing in case he found a
1:41:08way to interfere, to stop it."
1:41:11"So I Amarantha pushed Tamlin to Hybern
1:41:13instead?"
1:41:15"He was frantic. The scholars at the Day
1:41:18Court worked too slowly. I begged him
1:41:20for more time, but you'd already been
1:41:22gone for months.
1:41:24He wanted to act, not wait, despite that
1:41:26letter you sent, because of that letter
1:41:29you sent.
1:41:31I finally told him to go ahead with it
1:41:32after
1:41:34after that day in the forest."
1:41:37I turned onto my back, staring at the
1:41:39sloped ceiling of the tent.
1:41:42"How bad was it?" I asked quietly.
1:41:45"You saw your room." "He trashed it. The
1:41:48study, his bedroom." "He
1:41:51he killed the sentries who'd been on
1:41:53guard after he got the last bit of
1:41:55information from them."
1:41:57"He executed them in front of everyone
1:41:59in the manor."
1:42:01My blood chilled.
1:42:03"You didn't stop him?"
1:42:04"I tried. I begged him for mercy. He
1:42:07didn't listen. He couldn't listen."
1:42:10"The sentries didn't try to stop him,
1:42:12either?"
1:42:13"They didn't dare."
1:42:15"Feyre, he's a High Lord. He's a
1:42:17different breed."
1:42:19I wondered if he'd say the same thing if
1:42:20he knew what I was.
1:42:22We were backed into a corner with no
1:42:24options, none. It was either go to war
1:42:27with the Night Court and Hybern, or ally
1:42:30with Hybern. Let them try to stir up
1:42:32trouble, and then use that alliance to
1:42:34our own advantage further down the road.
1:42:37"What do you mean?" I breathed. But
1:42:40Lucien realized what he'd said and
1:42:42hedged.
1:42:43"We have enemies in every court. Having
1:42:46Hybern's alliance will make them think
1:42:48twice." Liar. Trained, clever liar.
1:42:52I loosed a heaving, sleepy breath.
1:42:56"Even if they're now our allies," I
1:42:58mumbled,
1:42:59"I still hate them."
1:43:01A snort. "Me, too."
1:43:06"Get up." Blinding sunlight cut into the
1:43:09tent, and I hissed. The order was
1:43:11drowned out by Lucien's snarl as he sat
1:43:14up. "Out," he ordered Jurian, who looked
1:43:17us over once, sneered, and stalked away.
1:43:21I'd rolled onto Lucien's bed roll at
1:43:22some point, and any schemes indeed
1:43:24second to my most pressing demand,
1:43:27warmth.
1:43:28But I had no doubt Jurian would tuck
1:43:30away the information to throw in
1:43:32Tamlin's face when we returned. We'd
1:43:34shared a tent and had been very cozy
1:43:37upon awakening.
1:43:39I washed in the nearby stream, my body
1:43:41stiff and aching from a night on the
1:43:43ground with or without the help of a
1:43:45bedroll.
1:43:47Brannau was prowling for the stream by
1:43:49the time I'd finished. The princess gave
1:43:51me a cold, thin smile.
1:43:54I'd pick Baron's son, too.
1:43:56I stared at the princess beneath lowered
1:43:58brows.
1:43:59She shrugged, her smile growing.
1:44:02Autumn Court males have fire in their
1:44:04blood, and they [ __ ] like it, too.
1:44:07I suppose you know from experience. A
1:44:10chuckle. Why do you think I had so much
1:44:12fun in the war?
1:44:14I didn't bother to hide my disgust.
1:44:17Lucien caught me cringing at him when
1:44:19her words replayed for the 10th time an
1:44:21hour later, while we hiked the half mile
1:44:23toward the crack in the wall.
1:44:25What? He demanded. I shook my head,
1:44:29trying not to imagine Elaine subject to
1:44:31that fire.
1:44:33Nothing, I said, just as Jurian swore
1:44:36ahead.
1:44:37We were both moving at his barked curse,
1:44:40and then broke into a run at the sound
1:44:41of a sword whining free of its sheath.
1:44:44Leaves and branches whipped at me, but
1:44:46then we were at the wall, that
1:44:48invisible, horrible marker humming and
1:44:50throbbing in my head.
1:44:52And staring right at us through the hole
1:44:54were three children of the blessed.
1:45:01Chapter 7
1:45:03Brannau and Dagden looked like they just
1:45:05found second breakfast waiting for them.
1:45:08Jurian had his sword out, the two young
1:45:10women and one young man gaping between
1:45:12him and the others, then at us, their
1:45:15eyes widening further as they noted
1:45:17Lucien's cruel beauty.
1:45:19They dropped to their knees. "Masters
1:45:21and mistresses," they beseeched us,
1:45:24their silver jewelry glinting in the
1:45:25dappled sunlight through the leaves. You
1:45:28have found us on our journey.
1:45:30The two royals smiled so broadly I could
1:45:32see all of their two white teeth.
1:45:35Jurian for once seemed torn before he
1:45:37snapped, "What are you doing here?"
1:45:40The dark-haired girl at the front was
1:45:41lovely. Her honey-gold skin flushed as
1:45:44she lifted her head.
1:45:46"We have come to dwell in the immortal
1:45:47lands. We have come as tribute."
1:45:50Jurian cut cold, hard eyes to Lucian.
1:45:54"Is this true?"
1:45:55Lucian stared him down.
1:45:57"We accept no tribute from the human
1:45:59lands, least of all children."
1:46:02Never mind that the three of them
1:46:03appeared only a few years younger than
1:46:05myself.
1:46:07"Why don't you come through?" Briar
1:46:09cooed, "And we can
1:46:11enjoy ourselves." She was indeed sizing
1:46:14up the brown-haired young man and the
1:46:16other girl. Her hair a ruddy brown, face
1:46:19sharp but interesting.
1:46:21From the way Dagda was leering at the
1:46:22beautiful girl in front, I knew he'd
1:46:25silently made his claim already.
1:46:27I shoved in front of them and said to
1:46:29the three mortals, "Get out. Go back to
1:46:32your villages, back to your families.
1:46:34You cross this wall and you will die."
1:46:37They balked, rising to their feet, faces
1:46:40taut with fear and awe. "We have come to
1:46:42live in peace." "There is no such thing
1:46:45here. There is only death for your
1:46:47kind."
1:46:48Their eyes slid to the immortals behind
1:46:50me.
1:46:51The dark-haired girl blushed at Dagda's
1:46:53intense stare, seeing the high fae
1:46:55beauty and none of the predator.
1:46:57So I struck.
1:46:59The wall was a screeching, terrible
1:47:01vice, crushing my magic, battering my
1:47:03head. But I speared my power through
1:47:06that gap and slammed into their minds.
1:47:08Too hard. The young man flinched a bit.
1:47:11So soft, defenseless. Their minds
1:47:15yielded like butter melting on my
1:47:16tongue.
1:47:18I beheld pieces of their lives like
1:47:20shards in a broken mirror, flashing
1:47:22every which way.
1:47:24The dark-haired girl was rich, educated,
1:47:26headstrong, had wanted to escape an
1:47:28arranged marriage, and believed Prythian
1:47:30was a better option. The ruddy-haired
1:47:32girl had known nothing but poverty and
1:47:34her father's fists, which had turned
1:47:36more violent after they'd ended her
1:47:38mother's life.
1:47:40The young man had sold himself on the
1:47:41streets of a large village until the
1:47:43children had come one day and offered
1:47:46him something better.
1:47:48I worked quickly, neatly.
1:47:50I was finished before three heartbeats
1:47:52had passed, before Brynn had even drawn
1:47:54breath to say,
1:47:56"There is no death here, only pleasure,
1:47:59if you are willing."
1:48:01Even if they weren't willing, I wanted
1:48:03to add.
1:48:04But the three of them now blinked,
1:48:06balking,
1:48:07beholding us for what we were, deadly,
1:48:10merciless, the truth behind the spun
1:48:12stories.
1:48:14"We perhaps have
1:48:16made a mistake," their leader said,
1:48:19retreating a step.
1:48:20"Or this was fate," Brynn countered with
1:48:23a snake smile.
1:48:25They kept backing away, kept seeing the
1:48:27histories I'd planted into their minds,
1:48:30that we were here to hurt and kill them,
1:48:32that we had done so with all their
1:48:33friends, that we'd use and discard them.
1:48:36I showed them the naga, the bogie, the
1:48:39Midgard worm. I showed them Claire and
1:48:41the golden-haired queen skewered on that
1:48:43lamp post.
1:48:45The memories I gave them became stories
1:48:47they had ignored, but now understood
1:48:49with us before them. "Come here," Dagdan
1:48:53ordered. The words were kindling to
1:48:55their fear.
1:48:56The three of them turned, heavy pale
1:48:58robes twisting with them, and bolted for
1:49:00the trees.
1:49:02Brynn tensed, as if she'd charge through
1:49:04the wall after them, but I gripped her
1:49:06arm and hissed, "If you pursue them,
1:49:09then you and I will have a problem."
1:49:11In emphasis, I dragged mental talons
1:49:14down her own shield. The princess
1:49:16snarled at me,
1:49:18but the humans were already gone.
1:49:20I prayed they'd listen to the other
1:49:22command I'd woven into their minds, to
1:49:24get on a boat, get as many friends as
1:49:26they could, and flee for the continent,
1:49:29to return here only when the war was
1:49:31over, and to warn as many humans as
1:49:33possible to get out before it was too
1:49:35late.
1:49:37The Hybern royals growled their
1:49:38displeasure, but I ignored it as I took
1:49:41up a spot against a tree and settled in
1:49:43to wait, not trusting them to stay on
1:49:46this side of the border.
1:49:48The royals resumed their work, stalking
1:49:50up and down the wall.
1:49:52A moment later, a male body came up
1:49:54beside mine.
1:49:56Not Lucien, I realized with a jolt, but
1:49:59did not so much as flinch.
1:50:01Jurian's eyes were on the place where
1:50:03the humans had been.
1:50:05"Thank you," he said, his voice rough.
1:50:09"I don't know what you're talking
1:50:10about," I replied,
1:50:12well aware that Lucien carefully watched
1:50:14from the shade of a nearby oak. Jurian
1:50:17gave me a knowing smirk and sauntered
1:50:19after Dagdan.
1:50:23They took all day.
1:50:25Whatever it was they were inspecting,
1:50:27whatever they were hunting for, the
1:50:29royals didn't inform us.
1:50:31And after the confrontation that
1:50:33morning, I knew pushing them into
1:50:35revealing it wouldn't happen. I'd used
1:50:37up my allotted tolerance for the day.
1:50:40So, we spent another night in the woods,
1:50:42which was precisely how I wound up
1:50:44sitting across the fire from Jurian
1:50:46after the twins had crawled into their
1:50:48tent and the sentries had taken up their
1:50:50watch positions.
1:50:52Lucien had gone to the stream to get
1:50:53more water,
1:50:55and I watched the flame dance amongst
1:50:57the logs, feeling it echo inside myself.
1:51:00Spearing my power through the wall had
1:51:02left me with a lingering pounding
1:51:04headache all day, more than a bit dizzy.
1:51:08I had no doubt sleep would claim me fast
1:51:10and hard, but the fire was too warm, and
1:51:13the spring night too brisk to willingly
1:51:15breach that long gap of darkness between
1:51:17the flame and my tent.
1:51:20"What happens to the ones who do not
1:51:22make it through the wall?" Jurian asked,
1:51:25the hard planes of his face cast in
1:51:27flickering relief by the fire.
1:51:30I ground the heel of my boot into the
1:51:31grass.
1:51:33"I don't know.
1:51:34They never came back once they went
1:51:36over.
1:51:37But while Amarantha ruled, creatures
1:51:39prowled these woods, so I don't think it
1:51:42ended well.
1:51:43I've never encountered a mention of them
1:51:45being at any court."
1:51:47"500 years ago, they'd have been flogged
1:51:50for that nonsense," Jurian said. "We
1:51:53were their slaves and [ __ ] and
1:51:54laborers for millennia.
1:51:56Men and women fought and died so we'd
1:51:58never have to serve them again.
1:52:00Yet there they are, in those costumes,
1:52:03unaware of the danger, the history."
1:52:06"Careful, or you might not sound like
1:52:09Hybern's faithful pet."
1:52:11A low, hateful laugh.
1:52:13"That's what you think I am, isn't it?
1:52:15His dog."
1:52:17"What's the end goal, then?"
1:52:19"I have unfinished business."
1:52:22"Miriam is dead."
1:52:24That madness danced again, replacing the
1:52:26rare lucidity.
1:52:28"Everything I did during the war, it was
1:52:30for Miriam and me, for our people to
1:52:32survive and one day be free. And she
1:52:35left me for that pretty-faced prince the
1:52:38moment I put my people before her."
1:52:41"I heard she left you because you became
1:52:42so focused on ringing information from
1:52:44Clythia that you lost sight of the real
1:52:47conflict."
1:52:48"Miriam told me to go ahead and [ __ ] her
1:52:51for information. Told me to seduce
1:52:53Clythia until she'd sold out all of
1:52:55Hybern and the loyalists. She had no
1:52:58qualms with that, none."
1:53:00"So, all of this is to get Miriam back?"
1:53:04He stretched his long legs before him,
1:53:06crossing one ankle over the other.
1:53:09It's to draw her out of her little nest
1:53:11with that winged prick and make her
1:53:14regret it.
1:53:16You get a second shot at life and that's
1:53:18what you wish to do? Revenge?
1:53:20Jurian smiled slowly. Isn't that what
1:53:23you're doing?
1:53:25Months of working with Rhys had me
1:53:26remembering to furrow my brow in
1:53:28confusion.
1:53:30Against Rhys, I would one day like it.
1:53:33That's what they all say when they
1:53:35pretend he's a sadistic murderer. You
1:53:37forget I knew him in the war. You forget
1:53:40he risked his legion to save Myriam from
1:53:42our enemy's fort.
1:53:44That's how Amarantha captured him, you
1:53:46know.
1:53:47Rhys knew it was a trap for Prince
1:53:49Drakon. So Rhys went against orders and
1:53:52marched in his whole legion to get
1:53:53Myriam out. For his friend, for my
1:53:57lover, and for that bastard Drakon's
1:53:59sake.
1:54:00Rhys sacrificed his legion in the
1:54:02process, got all of them captured and
1:54:04tortured afterward. Yet everyone insists
1:54:07Rhysand is soulless, wicked.
1:54:10But the male I knew was the most decent
1:54:13of them all. Better than that prick
1:54:15prince.
1:54:16You don't lose that quality, no matter
1:54:18the centuries, and Rhys was too smart to
1:54:20do anything but have the vilification of
1:54:22his character be a calculated move.
1:54:26And yet here you are, his mate. The most
1:54:29powerful High Lord in the world lost his
1:54:32mate and has not yet come to claim her.
1:54:35Even when she is defenseless in the
1:54:37woods.
1:54:38Jurian chuckled.
1:54:40Perhaps that's because Rhysand has not
1:54:43lost you at all, but rather unleashed
1:54:46you upon us.
1:54:49I had never heard that story, but it
1:54:51seemed so like my mate that I knew the
1:54:53flames between us now smoldered in my
1:54:55eyes as I said,
1:54:58You love to hear yourself talk, don't
1:55:00you?
1:55:01Hybern will kill all of you.
1:55:04Was all Jurian replied.
1:55:08Jurian wasn't wrong. Lucien woke me the
1:55:11next morning with a hand over my mouth,
1:55:13warning gleaming in his russet eye.
1:55:16I smelled it a moment later, the coppery
1:55:18tang of blood.
1:55:20We shoved into our clothes and boots,
1:55:23and I did a quick inventory of the
1:55:24weapons we'd squeezed into the tent with
1:55:26us. I had three daggers, Lucien had two,
1:55:29as well as an elegant short sword.
1:55:32Better than nothing, but not much.
1:55:34A glance from him communicated our plan
1:55:36well enough. Play casual until we
1:55:39assessed the situation.
1:55:41I had a heartbeat to realize that this
1:55:43was perhaps the first time he and I had
1:55:45worked in tandem. Hunting had never been
1:55:48a joint effort, and under the mountain
1:55:50had been one of us looking out for the
1:55:51other. Never a team, a unit.
1:55:55Lucien slid from the tent, limbs loose
1:55:58and ready to shift into a defensive
1:55:59position. He'd been trained, he once
1:56:02told me, at the Autumn Court and at this
1:56:04one.
1:56:05Like Rhys, he usually opted for words to
1:56:08win his battles, but I'd seen him and
1:56:10Tamlin in the practice ring. He knew how
1:56:12to handle a weapon, how to kill if need
1:56:15be.
1:56:16I pushed past him, devouring the details
1:56:19of my surroundings as if I were a
1:56:21starving man at a feast.
1:56:23The forest was the same. Jurian was
1:56:26crouched before the fire, stirring the
1:56:28embers back to alertness, his face a
1:56:30hard brooding mask. But the sentries,
1:56:34they were pale as Lucien stalked to
1:56:36them.
1:56:37I followed their shifting attention to
1:56:39the trees behind Jurian.
1:56:41No sign of the royals.
1:56:43The blood.
1:56:45A coppery tang, yes, but laced with
1:56:47earth and marrow and rot. Mortality.
1:56:52I stormed for the trees and dense brush.
1:56:55"You're too late," Jurian said as passed
1:56:58him, still poking the embers. "They
1:57:00finished two hours ago."
1:57:02Lucien was on my heels as I shoved into
1:57:05the brambles, thorns tearing at my
1:57:07hands.
1:57:08The Hybern royals hadn't bothered to
1:57:09clean up their mess. From what was left
1:57:12of the three bodies, their shredded pale
1:57:14robes like fallen ashes through the
1:57:16small clearing. Dagdan and Branna must
1:57:19have shut out their screams with some
1:57:20sort of shield. Lucien swore.
1:57:24"They went through the wall last night
1:57:26to hunt them down."
1:57:28Even with hours separating them, the
1:57:30royals were Fae, swift, immortal. The
1:57:33three children of the blessed would have
1:57:35tired after running, would have camped
1:57:37somewhere.
1:57:38Blood was already drying on the grass,
1:57:41on the trunks of the surrounding trees.
1:57:44Hybern's brand of torture wasn't very
1:57:45creative. Claire, the golden queen, and
1:57:48these three, a similar mutilating and
1:57:51torment. I unfastened my cloak and
1:57:54carefully laid it over the biggest
1:57:56remains of them I could find. The torso
1:57:58of the young man, clawed up and
1:58:00bloodless. His face was still etched in
1:58:03pain.
1:58:04Flame heated at my fingertips, begging
1:58:07me to burn them, to give them at least
1:58:09that sort of burial. But
1:58:12"Do you think it was for sport or to
1:58:14send us a message?" Lucien laid his own
1:58:17cloak across the remains of the two
1:58:19young women. His face was as serious as
1:58:21I'd ever seen it.
1:58:23"I think they aren't accustomed to being
1:58:25denied. I'd call this an immortal temper
1:58:28tantrum."
1:58:29I closed my eyes, trying to calm my
1:58:32roiling stomach.
1:58:33"You aren't to blame," he added. "They
1:58:36could have killed them out in the mortal
1:58:37lands, but they brought them here to
1:58:40make a statement about their power."
1:58:43He was right. The children of the
1:58:45blessed would have been dead even if I
1:58:47hadn't interfered.
1:58:49"They're threatened," I mused, "and
1:58:51proud to a fault. I towed the
1:58:54blood-soaked grass.
1:58:56Do we bury them?
1:58:57Lucien considered.
1:58:59It sends a message that we're willing to
1:59:01clean up their messes.
1:59:03I surveyed the clearing again,
1:59:05considered everything at stake.
1:59:08Then we send another sort of message.
1:59:15Chapter 8
1:59:17Tamlin paced in front of the hearth in
1:59:19his study, every turn as sharp as a
1:59:21blade. They are our allies, he growled
1:59:25at me, at Lucien, both of us seated in
1:59:27armchairs flanking the mantle.
1:59:30They're monsters, I countered. They
1:59:32butchered three innocents. And you
1:59:34should have left it alone for me to deal
1:59:36with. Tamlin heaved a jagged breath, not
1:59:39retaliated like children.
1:59:41He threw a glare in Lucien's direction.
1:59:44I expected better from you.
1:59:46But not from me? I asked quietly.
1:59:50Tamlin's green eyes were like frozen
1:59:52jade.
1:59:53You have a personal connection to those
1:59:55people. He does not.
1:59:58That's the sort of thinking, I snapped,
2:00:00clutching the armrests, that has allowed
2:00:02for a wall to be the only solution
2:00:04between our two peoples, for the Fae to
2:00:06look at these sorts of murders and not
2:00:08care.
2:00:10I knew the guards outside could hear,
2:00:12knew anyone walking by could hear.
2:00:14The loss of any life on either side is a
2:00:16personal connection. Or is it only High
2:00:19Fae lives that matter to you?
2:00:22Tamlin stopped short and snarled at
2:00:24Lucien. Get out. I'll deal with you
2:00:27later. Don't you talk to him like that,
2:00:30I hissed, shooting to my feet. You have
2:00:32jeopardized this alliance with that
2:00:34stunt you two pulled.
2:00:36Good. They can burn in hell for all I
2:00:38care, I shouted. Lucien flinched. You
2:00:42sent the bogey after them, Tamlin
2:00:44roared.
2:00:46I didn't so much as blink, and I knew
2:00:48the sentries had heard indeed by the
2:00:49cough of one outside, a sound of muffled
2:00:52shock. And I made sure those sentries
2:00:54could still hear as I said, "They
2:00:57terrorized those humans, made them
2:00:59suffer. I figured the bogey was one of
2:01:01the few creatures that could return the
2:01:03favor."
2:01:04Lucien had tracked it down, and we lured
2:01:07it carefully over hours back to that
2:01:09camp. Right to where Dagdan and Branna
2:01:12had been gloating over their kill.
2:01:14They'd managed to get away, but only
2:01:16after what had sounded like a good bit
2:01:18of screaming and fighting.
2:01:20Their faces remained bloodless even
2:01:22hours later, their eyes still brimming
2:01:24with hate whenever they deigned to look
2:01:26at us.
2:01:27Lucien cleared his throat, stood as
2:01:30well.
2:01:31Tam.
2:01:32Those humans were barely more than
2:01:34children.
2:01:35Feyre gave the royals an order to stand
2:01:37down. They ignored it.
2:01:40If we let Hybern walk all over us, we
2:01:42stand to lose more than their alliance.
2:01:45The bogey reminded them that we aren't
2:01:46without our claws, too.
2:01:49Tamlin didn't take his eyes off me as he
2:01:51said to Lucien, "Get out."
2:01:55There was enough violence in the words
2:01:56that neither Lucien nor I objected this
2:01:58time. As he slipped from the room and
2:02:01shut the double doors behind him,
2:02:03I speared my power into the hall,
2:02:05sensing him sitting on the foot of the
2:02:07stairs, listening as the six sentries in
2:02:10the hall were listening.
2:02:12I said to Tamlin, my back ramrod
2:02:14straight,
2:02:15"You don't get to speak to me like that.
2:02:18You promised you wouldn't act this way.
2:02:20You have no idea what's at risk. Don't
2:02:22you talk down to me. Not after what I
2:02:25went through to get back here, to you,
2:02:27to our people.
2:02:29You think any of us are happy to be
2:02:30working with Hybern? You think I don't
2:02:33see it in their faces, the question of
2:02:35whether I am worth the dishonor of it?"
2:02:38His breathing turned ragged again. Good,
2:02:41I wanted to urge him. Good.
2:02:44"You sold us out to get me back." I
2:02:47said, low and cold. "You [ __ ] us out
2:02:50to Hybern.
2:02:52Forgive me if I am now trying to regain
2:02:54some of what we lost."
2:02:56Claws slid free. A feral growl rippled
2:02:59out of him.
2:03:00"They hunted down and butchered those
2:03:02humans for sport." I went on. "You might
2:03:05be willing to get on your knees for
2:03:06Hybern, but I certainly am not."
2:03:09He exploded. Furniture splintered and
2:03:12went flying. Windows cracked and
2:03:14shattered. And this time, I did not
2:03:17shield myself. The work tables slammed
2:03:19into me, throwing me against the
2:03:21bookshelf, and every place where flesh
2:03:23and bone met wood barked and ached. My
2:03:26knees slammed into the carpeted floor,
2:03:29and Tamlin was instantly in front of me,
2:03:31hands shaking. The doors burst open.
2:03:34"What have you done?" Lucien breathed,
2:03:37and Tamlin's face was the picture of
2:03:38devastation as Lucien shoved him aside.
2:03:41He let Lucien shove him aside and help
2:03:44me stand.
2:03:46Something wet and warm slid down my
2:03:48cheek. Blood from the scent of it.
2:03:51"Let's get you cleaned up." Lucien said,
2:03:54an arm around my shoulders as he eased
2:03:56me from the room. I barely heard him
2:03:58over the ringing in my ears, the slight
2:04:00spinning to the world. The centuries,
2:04:03Brawn and Hart, two of Tamlin's favorite
2:04:05Lord warriors among them, were gaping,
2:04:08attention torn between the wrecked study
2:04:10and my face. With good reason.
2:04:13As Lucien led me past a gilded hall
2:04:15mirror, I beheld what had drawn such
2:04:17horror.
2:04:18My eyes were glassy, my face pallid,
2:04:21save for the scratch just beneath my
2:04:23cheekbone, perhaps 2 inches long and
2:04:26leaking blood.
2:04:27Little scratches peppered my neck, my
2:04:29hands, but I willed that cleansing
2:04:32healing power, that of the High Lord of
2:04:34Dawn, to keep from seeking them out,
2:04:37from smoothing them away.
2:04:39Feyre, Tamlin breathed from behind us.
2:04:42I halted, aware of every eye that
2:04:44watched.
2:04:46I'm fine, I whispered.
2:04:48I'm sorry.
2:04:50I wiped at the blood dribbling down my
2:04:51cheek. I'm fine,
2:04:53I told him again.
2:04:55No one, not even Tamlin, looked
2:04:57convinced.
2:04:59And if I could have painted that moment,
2:05:01I would have named it a portrait in
2:05:03snares and baiting.
2:05:07Rhysand sent word down the bond the
2:05:09second I was soaking in the bathtub. Are
2:05:12you hurt? The question was faint. The
2:05:15bond quieter and tenser than it had been
2:05:17days ago.
2:05:18Sore, but fine. Nothing I can't handle.
2:05:22Though my injuries still lingered and
2:05:24showed no signs of a speedy healing.
2:05:27Perhaps I'd been too good at keeping
2:05:28those healing powers at bay.
2:05:31The reply was a long time coming. Then
2:05:33it came all at once. As if he wanted to
2:05:35cram every word in before the difficulty
2:05:38of the distance silenced us.
2:05:40I know better than to tell you to be
2:05:42careful or to come home.
2:05:44But I want you home soon. And I want him
2:05:48dead for putting a hand on you.
2:05:50Even with the entirety of the land
2:05:52between us, his rage rippled down the
2:05:54bond.
2:05:56I answered, my tone soothing, dry.
2:05:59Technically, his magic touched me, not
2:06:02his hand.
2:06:03The bathwater was cold by the time his
2:06:05reply came through. I'm glad you have a
2:06:08sense of humor about this. I certainly
2:06:10don't.
2:06:12I sent back an image of me sticking out
2:06:13my tongue at him. My clothes were back
2:06:16on when his answer arrived. Like mine,
2:06:19it was wordless, a mere image. Like
2:06:21mine, Rhysand's tongue was out, but it
2:06:24was occupied with doing something else.
2:06:30I made a point to take a ride the next
2:06:32day, made sure it was when Brawn and
2:06:34Hart were on duty, and asked them to
2:06:36escort me. They didn't say much, but I
2:06:39felt their assessing glances at my every
2:06:41wince as we rode the worn paths through
2:06:43the spring wood. Felt them study the cut
2:06:45on my face, the bruises beneath my
2:06:48clothes that had me hissing every now
2:06:50and then. Still not fully healed to my
2:06:52surprise, though I supposed it worked to
2:06:55my advantage.
2:06:56Tamlin had begged my forgiveness at
2:06:58dinner yesterday, and I'd given it to
2:07:00him, but Lucien hadn't spoken to him all
2:07:03evening.
2:07:04Jurian and the Highbern royals had
2:07:06sulked at the delay after I'd quietly
2:07:08admitted my bruises made it too
2:07:10difficult to accompany them to the wall.
2:07:13Tamlin hadn't possessed the nerve to
2:07:14suggest they go without me, to rob me of
2:07:17that duty.
2:07:18Not when he saw the purplish markings
2:07:20and knew that if they were on a human, I
2:07:22might have been dead.
2:07:24And the royals, after Lucien and I had
2:07:27sent the bogey's invisible malice after
2:07:29them, had backed off for now.
2:07:32I kept my shields up around myself and
2:07:35the others. The strain now a constant
2:07:37headache that had any extra sort of
2:07:39magic feeling feeble and thin.
2:07:42The reprieve on the border hadn't done
2:07:43much. No, it had made the strain worse
2:07:47after I'd sent my power through the
2:07:48wall.
2:07:50I'd invited Ianthe to the house, subtly
2:07:53requesting her comforting presence. She
2:07:55arrived knowing the full details of what
2:07:57had transpired in that study, letting it
2:08:00conveniently slip that Tamlin had
2:08:01confessed it to her, pleading for
2:08:03absolution from the Mother and Cauldron
2:08:06and whoever else.
2:08:07I prattled about my own forgiveness to
2:08:09her that evening, and made a show of
2:08:11taking her good counsel, telling the
2:08:14courtiers and others at our crowded
2:08:15table that night how lucky we were to
2:08:18have Tamlin and Ianthe guarding our
2:08:20lands.
2:08:21Honestly, I don't know how none of them
2:08:24connected it. How none of them saw my
2:08:26words as not a strange coincidence, but
2:08:29a dare, a threat,
2:08:31that last little nudge,
2:08:33especially when seven naga broke into
2:08:35the estate grounds just past midnight.
2:08:39They were dispatched before they reached
2:08:40the house, an attack halted by a
2:08:42cauldron-sent warning vision from none
2:08:45other than Ianthe herself.
2:08:47The chaos and screaming woke the estate.
2:08:50I remained in my room, guards beneath my
2:08:53windows and outside my door.
2:08:55Tamlin himself, blood-drenched and
2:08:57panting, came to inform me that the
2:08:59grounds were again secure,
2:09:01that the naga had been found with the
2:09:03keys to the gate, and the sentry who had
2:09:05lost them would be dealt with in the
2:09:07morning. A freak accident, a final show
2:09:10of power from a tribe that had not gone
2:09:12gently after Amarantha's reign.
2:09:14All of us saved from further harm by
2:09:17Ianthe.
2:09:18We all gathered outside the barracks the
2:09:20next morning. Lucien's face pallid and
2:09:23drawn, purple smudges beneath his glazed
2:09:25eyes. He hadn't returned to his room
2:09:28last night.
2:09:29Beside me, the Hybern royals and Jurian
2:09:32were silent and grim as Tamlin paced
2:09:34before the sentry strung up between two
2:09:36posts.
2:09:38"You were entrusted with guarding this
2:09:40estate and its people," Tamlin said to
2:09:42the shuddering male, already stripped
2:09:44down to his pants.
2:09:46"You were found not only asleep at the
2:09:48gate last night, but it was your set of
2:09:50keys that originally went missing."
2:09:53Tamlin snarled softly.
2:09:55"Do you deny this?"
2:09:58"I
2:09:59I never fall asleep. It's never happened
2:10:01until now. I must have just nodded off
2:10:03for a minute or two," the sentry
2:10:05stammered, the ropes restraining him
2:10:07groaning as he strained against them.
2:10:10"You jeopardized the lives of everyone
2:10:12in this manner,
2:10:14and it could not go unpunished, not with
2:10:17the Hybern royals here seeking any sign
2:10:19of weakness."
2:10:21Tamlin held out a hand. Bron,
2:10:23stone-faced, approached to give him a
2:10:26whip. All the centuries, his most
2:10:28trusted warriors shifted about. Some
2:10:31outright glaring at Tamlin, some trying
2:10:33not to watch what was about to unfold. I
2:10:36grabbed Lucien's hand. It wasn't
2:10:38entirely for show.
2:10:40Ianthe stepped forward, hands folded
2:10:43over her stomach.
2:10:44"20 lashes, and one more for the
2:10:47Cauldron's forgiveness."
2:10:49The guards turned baleful eyes toward
2:10:51her now. Tamlin unfurled the whip onto
2:10:53the dirt.
2:10:55I made my move, slid my power into the
2:10:57bound sentry's mind, and freed the
2:10:59memory I coiled up tightly in his head.
2:11:02Freed his tongue, too.
2:11:04"It was her!" he panted, jerking his
2:11:06chin to Ianthe. "She took the keys!"
2:11:10Tamlin blinked, and everyone in that
2:11:12courtyard looked right to Ianthe.
2:11:14Her face didn't so much as flinch at the
2:11:16accusation, the truth he'd flung her
2:11:18way.
2:11:20I'd been waiting to see how she'd
2:11:21counter my showing of power at the
2:11:23solstice, tracking her movements that
2:11:25entire day and night. Within moments of
2:11:28my leaving the party, she'd gone to the
2:11:30barracks, used some glimmer of power to
2:11:32lull him to sleep, and taken his keys.
2:11:35Then planted her warnings about the
2:11:37Naga's impending attacks after she gave
2:11:40the creatures the keys to the gates, so
2:11:42she could sound the alarm last night. So
2:11:45she could save us from a real threat.
2:11:47Clever idea, had it not played right
2:11:50into everything I'd laid out.
2:11:52Ianthe said smoothly, "Why should I take
2:11:55the keys? I warned you of the attack."
2:11:58"You were at the barracks. I saw you
2:12:01that night." the sentry insisted, then
2:12:04turned pleading eyes to Tamlin.
2:12:06It wasn't fear of pain that propelled
2:12:08him, I realized. No, the lashings would
2:12:11have been deserved and earned and borne
2:12:13well.
2:12:14It was the fear of honor lost. "I would
2:12:17have thought one of your centuries,
2:12:19Tamlin, would have more dignity than to
2:12:21spread lies to spare himself from some
2:12:24fleeting pain.
2:12:25Ianthe's face remained serene as always.
2:12:28Tamlin, to his credit, studied the
2:12:30century for a long moment. I stepped
2:12:33forward. I will hear his story.
2:12:36Some of the guards loosed sighs. Some
2:12:39looked at me with pity and affection.
2:12:41Ianthe lifted her chin.
2:12:43With all due respect, my lady, it is not
2:12:46your judgment to make.
2:12:48And there it was, the attempt to knock
2:12:50me down a few pegs.
2:12:52Just because it would make her see red,
2:12:54I ignored her completely and said to the
2:12:56century,
2:12:58I will hear your story.
2:13:00I kept my focus on him, even as I
2:13:02counted my breaths, even as I prayed
2:13:05that Ianthe would take the bait. You'll
2:13:07take the word of a century over that of
2:13:09a high priestess?
2:13:11My disgust at her blurted words wasn't
2:13:12entirely feigned, even though hiding my
2:13:15faint smile was an effort. The guards
2:13:18shifted on their feet at the insult, the
2:13:20tone. Even if they had not already
2:13:22trusted their fellow century, from her
2:13:24words alone, they realized her guilt.
2:13:27I looked to Tamlin then, saw his eyes
2:13:30sharpen as well, with understanding. Too
2:13:33many protests from Ianthe.
2:13:36Oh, he was well aware that Ianthe had
2:13:38perhaps planted that Naga attack to
2:13:40reclaim some shred of power and
2:13:42influence as a savior of these people.
2:13:45Tamlin's mouth tightened in disapproval.
2:13:48I'd given them both a length of rope. I
2:13:51supposed now would be the moment to see
2:13:53whether they'd hang themselves with it.
2:13:55I dared one more step forward, up
2:13:57turning my palms to Tamlin.
2:14:00Perhaps it was a mistake. Don't take it
2:14:02from his hide or his honor. Let's hear
2:14:05him out.
2:14:07Tamlin's eyes softened a fraction. He
2:14:09remained silent, considering. But behind
2:14:12me, Bwrana snorted, "Pathetic." She
2:14:16murmured, though everyone could hear it.
2:14:19"Weak, vulnerable, ripe for conquest." I
2:14:22saw the words slam through Tamlin's face
2:14:25as if they were shutting doors in their
2:14:26wake.
2:14:27There was no other interpretation, not
2:14:30for Tamlin.
2:14:31But Ianthe assessed me, standing before
2:14:34the crowd, the influence I'd made so
2:14:36very clear I was capable of stealing. If
2:14:39she admitted guilt, whatever she had
2:14:41left would come crumbling down.
2:14:44Tamlin opened his mouth, but Ianthe cut
2:14:46him off. "There are laws to be obeyed,"
2:14:49she told me, gently enough that I wanted
2:14:52to drag my nails down her face.
2:14:54"Traditions.
2:14:56He has broken our trust, has let our
2:14:58blood be spilled for his carelessness.
2:15:01Now he seeks to accuse a High Priestess
2:15:03of his failings? It cannot go
2:15:05unpunished." She nodded to Tamlin. "21
2:15:09lashes, High Lord."
2:15:11I glanced between them, my mouth going
2:15:13dry.
2:15:14"Please,
2:15:16just listen to him."
2:15:17The guard hanging between the posts had
2:15:19such hope and gratitude in his eyes.
2:15:22In this, in this, my revenge edged
2:15:25toward something oily, something foreign
2:15:28and queasy.
2:15:29He would heal from the pain, but the
2:15:31blow to his honor,
2:15:33it had take a little piece out of mine
2:15:34as well.
2:15:36Tamlin stared at me, then Ianthe, then
2:15:39glanced to the smirking High Born
2:15:41royals, to Jurian, who crossed his arms,
2:15:43his face unreadable.
2:15:46And like I gambled, Tamlin's need for
2:15:48control, for strength, won out.
2:15:51Ianthe was too important an ally to risk
2:15:53isolating. The word of a low sentry? No,
2:15:58it did not matter as much as hers.
2:16:00Tamlin turned to the sentry tied to the
2:16:02posts. "Put the bit in," he He ordered
2:16:05Bwrana.
2:16:06There was a heartbeat of hesitation from
2:16:08Bron, as if the shock of Tamlin's order
2:16:11had rippled through him, through all the
2:16:13guards, siding with Ianthe over them,
2:16:17his centuries,
2:16:18who had gone over the wall again and
2:16:20again to try to break that curse for
2:16:22him, who had gladly done it, gladly
2:16:25died, hunted down as those wolves for
2:16:27him. And the wolf-eyed Feld, Andras,
2:16:31he'd gone willingly, too.
2:16:33Tamlin had sent them all over, and not
2:16:35all of them had come back. They had gone
2:16:38willingly, yet this
2:16:40this was his thanks, his gratitude, his
2:16:43trust.
2:16:45But Bron did as commanded, sliding the
2:16:47small piece of wood into the now
2:16:48trembling sentry's mouth.
2:16:51Judging by the barely concealed disdain
2:16:53in the guards' faces, at least they were
2:16:55aware of what had occurred, or what they
2:16:58believed had occurred.
2:17:00The High Priestess had orchestrated this
2:17:01entire attack to cast herself as a
2:17:04savior, offering up the reputation of
2:17:07one of their own as the asking price.
2:17:09They had no idea, none, that I'd goaded
2:17:12her into it, pushed and pushed her to
2:17:14reveal just what a snake she was, how
2:17:17little anyone without a title meant to
2:17:19her, how Tamlin listened to her without
2:17:21question, to a fault.
2:17:24It wasn't much of an act when I put my
2:17:26hand to my throat, backing up a step,
2:17:28then another, until Lucien's warmth was
2:17:31against me, and I leaned fully into him.
2:17:35The centuries were sizing up Ianthe, the
2:17:37royals. Tamlin had always been one of
2:17:39them, fought for them, until now, until
2:17:43Hybern, until he put these foreign
2:17:45monsters before them, until he put a
2:17:47scheming High Priestess before them.
2:17:51Tamlin's eyes were on us, on the hand
2:17:53Lucien put on my arm to steady me as he
2:17:56drew back the whip. The thunderous crack
2:17:58as it cleaved the air snapped through
2:18:00the barracks, the estate,
2:18:03through the very foundations of the
2:18:04court.
2:18:09Chapter nine.
2:18:12Ianthe wasn't done. I knew it, braced
2:18:15myself for it. She didn't flit back to
2:18:17her temple a few miles away. Rather, she
2:18:20remained at the house, seizing her
2:18:22chance to worm her way closer to Tamlin.
2:18:25She believed she'd gained a foothold,
2:18:27that her declaration of justice served
2:18:29at the bloody end of the whipping,
2:18:30hadn't been anything but a final slap in
2:18:32the face to the guards who watched.
2:18:35And when that sentry had sagged from his
2:18:37bindings, when the others came to gently
2:18:39untie him, Ianthe merely ushered the
2:18:42Hybern party and Tamlin into the manor
2:18:44for lunch.
2:18:45But I'd remained at the barracks,
2:18:47tending to the groaning sentry, drawing
2:18:50away bloodied bowls of water while the
2:18:51healer quietly patched him up.
2:18:54Brawn and Hart personally escorted me
2:18:56back to the estate hours later. I
2:18:58thanked them each by name, then
2:19:00apologized that I hadn't been able to
2:19:02prevent it. Ianthe's scheming or the
2:19:05unjust punishment of their friend.
2:19:08I meant every word, the crack of the
2:19:10whip still echoing in my ears.
2:19:12Then they spoke the words I'd been
2:19:14waiting for.
2:19:15They were sorry they hadn't stopped any
2:19:17of it either.
2:19:19Not just today, but the bruises now
2:19:21fading, at last, the other incidents. If
2:19:25I had asked them, they would have handed
2:19:27me their own knives to slit their
2:19:28throats.
2:19:30The next evening, I was hurrying back to
2:19:32my room to change for dinner when I
2:19:34Ianthe made her next move.
2:19:36She was to come with us to the wall
2:19:38tomorrow morning. Her and Tamlin, too.
2:19:42If we were all to be a united front,
2:19:44she'd declared over dinner, then she
2:19:46wished to see the wall herself.
2:19:49The Hybern royals didn't care, but
2:19:51Jurian winked at me as if he, too, saw
2:19:53the game in motion.
2:19:55I packed my own bags that night.
2:19:58Alice entered right before bed, a third
2:20:00pack in her hands. "Since it's a longer
2:20:03trip, I brought you supplies."
2:20:06Even with Tamlin joining us, it was too
2:20:08many people for him to winnow us
2:20:10directly.
2:20:11So, we'd go, as we'd done before, in
2:20:13segments, a few miles at a time.
2:20:17Alice laid the pack she'd prepared
2:20:19beside my own, picked up the brush on
2:20:21the vanity, and beckoned me to sit on
2:20:23the cushioned bench before it. I obeyed.
2:20:26For a few minutes, she brushed my hair
2:20:28in silence.
2:20:30Then, she said, "When you leave
2:20:32tomorrow, I leave, too."
2:20:35I lifted my eyes to hers in the mirror.
2:20:38"My nephews are packed. The ponies ready
2:20:40to take us back to Summer Court
2:20:42territory at last.
2:20:44It has been too long since I saw my
2:20:46home." she said, though her eyes shone.
2:20:50"I know the feeling." was all I said.
2:20:53"I wish you well, lady." Alice said,
2:20:56setting down the brush and beginning to
2:20:57braid back my hair.
2:20:59"For the rest of your days, however long
2:21:02they may be,
2:21:03I wish you well."
2:21:05I let her finish the plate, then pivoted
2:21:07on the bench to grip her thin fingers in
2:21:09mine.
2:21:11"Don't ever tell Tamlin you know me
2:21:13well."
2:21:14Her brows rose.
2:21:16"There is a blood ruby with my name on
2:21:18it." I clarified. Even her tree bark
2:21:21skin seemed to blanch. She understood it
2:21:23well enough. I was a hunted enemy of the
2:21:26Summer Court. Only my death would be
2:21:28accepted as payment for my crimes.
2:21:31Alice squeezed my hand.
2:21:33"Blood rubies or no, you will always
2:21:36have one friend in the Summer Court."
2:21:39My throat bobbed.
2:21:41"And you will always have one in mine."
2:21:43I promised her.
2:21:45She knew which court I meant, and did
2:21:47not look afraid.
2:21:51The sentries did not glance at Tamlin,
2:21:53or so much as speak to him unless
2:21:55absolutely necessary.
2:21:57Brawn Heart and three others were to
2:21:59join us. They had spotted me checking on
2:22:01their friend before dawn, a courtesy I
2:22:03knew none of the others had extended.
2:22:06Winnowing felt like wading through mud.
2:22:09In fact, my powers had become more of a
2:22:11burden than a help. I had a throbbing
2:22:13headache by noon and spent the last leg
2:22:16of the journey dizzy and disoriented as
2:22:18we went out again and again.
2:22:21We arrived and set up camp in near
2:22:23silence. I quietly,
2:22:26shyly asked to share a tent with Ianthe
2:22:27instead of Tamlin, appearing eager to
2:22:30mend the rift the whipping had torn
2:22:32between us.
2:22:33But I did it more to spare Lucien from
2:22:35her attention than to keep Tamlin at
2:22:37bay.
2:22:38Dinner was made and eaten, bedrolls laid
2:22:41out, and Tamlin ordered Brawn and Heart
2:22:43on the first watch.
2:22:45Lying beside Ianthe without slitting her
2:22:47throat was an exercise in patience and
2:22:50control.
2:22:51But whenever the knife beneath my pillow
2:22:53seemed to whisper her name, I'd remind
2:22:56myself of my friends, the family that
2:22:58was alive, healing in the north.
2:23:01I repeated their names silently over and
2:23:04over into the darkness.
2:23:06Rhysand, Mor, Cassian, Amren, Azriel,
2:23:11Elain, Nesta.
2:23:14I thought of how I had last seen them,
2:23:16so bloodied and hurting.
2:23:18Thought of Cassian's screams as his
2:23:20wings were shredded, of Azriel's threat
2:23:22to the king as he advanced on Mor, Nesta
2:23:25fighting every step toward the Cauldron.
2:23:28My goal was bigger than revenge, my
2:23:30purpose greater than personal
2:23:32retribution.
2:23:34Dawn broke, and I found my palm curled
2:23:37around the hilt of my knife anyway.
2:23:39I drew it out as I sat up, staring down
2:23:42at the sleeping priestess.
2:23:44The smooth column of her neck seemed to
2:23:46glow in the early morning sun leaking
2:23:49through the tent flaps.
2:23:51I weighed the knife in my hand.
2:23:53I wasn't sure I'd been born with the
2:23:55ability to forgive, not for terrors
2:23:57inflicted on those I loved. For myself,
2:24:00I didn't care, not nearly as much.
2:24:03But there was some fundamental pillar of
2:24:05steel in me that could not bend or break
2:24:07in this, could not stomach the idea of
2:24:10letting these people get away with what
2:24:12they'd done.
2:24:14Ianthe's eyes opened. The teal as limpid
2:24:16as her discarded circlet. They went
2:24:19right to the knife in my hand, then to
2:24:21my face. "You can't be too careful while
2:24:23sharing a camp with enemies." I said.
2:24:26I could have sworn something like fear
2:24:28shown in her eyes.
2:24:30"Highborn is not our enemy." She said a
2:24:33tad breathlessly.
2:24:35From her paleness as I left the tent, I
2:24:37knew my answering smile had done its job
2:24:40well.
2:24:43Lucien and Tamlin showed the twins where
2:24:45the crack in the wall lay. And as they
2:24:48had done with the first two, they spent
2:24:50hours surveying it, the surrounding
2:24:52land.
2:24:53I kept close this time, watching them.
2:24:56My presence now deemed relatively
2:24:58unthreatening if not a nuisance. We'd
2:25:00played our little power games,
2:25:02established I could bite if I wished,
2:25:04but we'd tolerate each other.
2:25:07"Here." Briar murmured to Dagdan,
2:25:09jerking her chin to the invisible
2:25:11divider.
2:25:12The only markings were the different
2:25:13trees. On our side, they were the bright
2:25:16fresh green of spring. On the other,
2:25:18they were dark, broad, curling slightly
2:25:21with heat, the height of summer.
2:25:24"The first one was better." Dagdan
2:25:26countered. I sat atop a small boulder,
2:25:29peeling an apple with a paring knife.
2:25:32"Closer to the western coast, too." He
2:25:34added to his twin. "This is closer to
2:25:37the continent, to the straight." I
2:25:39sliced deep into the flesh of the apple,
2:25:42carving out a hunk of white meat. Yes,
2:25:45but we'd have more access to the High
2:25:46Lord's supplies.
2:25:48Said High Lord was currently off with
2:25:50Jurian hunting for food more filling
2:25:52than the sandwiches we'd packed.
2:25:55Ianthe had gone to a nearby spring to
2:25:57pray, and I had no idea whatsoever where
2:26:00Lucien or the centuries were.
2:26:02Good. Easier for me. As I shoved the
2:26:05apple slice into my mouth and sat around
2:26:07it,
2:26:08I say go for this one.
2:26:10They twisted toward me, Breonna sneering
2:26:13and Dagdan's brows high.
2:26:15What do you know of any of it? Breonna
2:26:17demanded. I shrugged, cutting another
2:26:20piece of apple.
2:26:21You two talk louder than you realize.
2:26:24Shared accusatory glares between them.
2:26:27Proud, arrogant, cruel.
2:26:29I'd been taking their measure this
2:26:30fortnight.
2:26:32Unless you want to risk the other courts
2:26:34having time to rally and intercepting
2:26:36you before you can cross to the
2:26:37straight,
2:26:38I'd pick this one.
2:26:40Breonna rolled her eyes. I went on,
2:26:43rambling and bored.
2:26:45But what do I know? You two have
2:26:47squatted on a little island for 500
2:26:49years. Clearly you know more about
2:26:51Prythian and moving armies than me.
2:26:54Breonna hissed. This is not about
2:26:56armies. So I will trust you to keep that
2:26:58mouth shut until we have use for you.
2:27:01I snorted.
2:27:03You mean to tell me all of this nonsense
2:27:05hasn't been to find a place to break
2:27:06through the wall and use the cauldron to
2:27:08also transport the mass of your armies
2:27:10here?
2:27:12She laughed, swinging her dark curtain
2:27:14of hair over a shoulder.
2:27:16The cauldron is not for transporting
2:27:18grunt armies. It is for remaking worlds.
2:27:21It is for bringing down this hideous
2:27:23wall and reclaiming what we were.
2:27:26I merely crossed my legs.
2:27:29I'd think that with an army of 10,000
2:27:31you wouldn't need any magical objects to
2:27:33do your dirty work.
2:27:34Our army is 10 times that, girl, Breanna
2:27:38sneered, and twice that number if you
2:27:40count our allies in Valahan, Montaser,
2:27:43and Rask.
2:27:44200,000.
2:27:46Mother save us.
2:27:48You've certainly been busy all these
2:27:49years. I surveyed them, utterly
2:27:52nonplussed.
2:27:53Why not strike when Amarantha had the
2:27:55island?
2:27:57The king had not yet found the Cauldron,
2:27:59despite years of searching. It served
2:28:01his purposes to let her be an experiment
2:28:04for how we might break these people.
2:28:06And served as good motivation for our
2:28:08allies on the continent to join us,
2:28:10knowing what would await them.
2:28:13I finished off my apple and chucked the
2:28:15core into the woods. They watched it fly
2:28:18like two hounds tracking a pheasant.
2:28:20So, they're all going to converge here?
2:28:23I'm supposed to play hostess to so many
2:28:25soldiers?
2:28:26Our own force will take care of Prythian
2:28:28before uniting with the others.
2:28:31Our commanders are preparing for it as
2:28:33we speak.
2:28:34You must think you stand a shot at
2:28:36losing if you're bothering to use the
2:28:38Cauldron to help you win.
2:28:40The Cauldron is victory. It will wipe
2:28:43this world clean again. I lifted my
2:28:45brows in irreverent cynicism.
2:28:48And you need this exact spot to unleash
2:28:50it?
2:28:51This exact spot, Dagdan said, a hand on
2:28:55the hilt of his sword, exists because a
2:28:57person or object of mighty power passed
2:29:00through it. The Cauldron will study the
2:29:02work they've already done and magnify it
2:29:04until the wall collapses entirely. It is
2:29:07a careful, complex process, and one I
2:29:10doubt your mortal mind can grasp.
2:29:13Probably.
2:29:14Though this mortal mind did manage to
2:29:16solve Amarantha's riddle and destroy
2:29:19her.
2:29:20Breanna merely turned back to the wall.
2:29:22Why do you think Hybern let her live for
2:29:24so long in these lands? Better to have
2:29:27someone else do his dirty work.
2:29:32I had what I needed. Tamlin and Jurian
2:29:34were still off hunting. The royals were
2:29:36preoccupied, and I'd sent the sentries
2:29:39to fetch me more water, claiming that
2:29:41some of my bruises still ached, and I
2:29:43wanted to make a poultice for them.
2:29:45They'd looked positively murderous at
2:29:47that. Not at me, but at who had given me
2:29:50those bruises, who had picked Ianthe
2:29:53over them, and Hybern over their honor
2:29:55and people. I'd brought three packs, but
2:29:58I'd only need one. The one I'd carefully
2:30:01repacked with Alis's new supplies, now
2:30:03tucked beside everything I'd anticipated
2:30:05needing to get clear of them and go.
2:30:08The one I'd brought with me on every
2:30:09trip out to the wall, just in case. And
2:30:13now,
2:30:14I had numbers, I had a purpose, I had a
2:30:17specific location, and the names of
2:30:19foreign territories.
2:30:21But more than that, I had a people who
2:30:23had lost faith in their High Priestess.
2:30:26I had sentries who were beginning to
2:30:27rebel against their High Lord. And as a
2:30:30result of those things, I had Hybern
2:30:32royals doubting the strength of their
2:30:34allies here. I'd primed this court to
2:30:37fall, not from outside forces, but its
2:30:40own internal warring.
2:30:42And I had to be clear of it before it
2:30:43happened, before the last sliver of my
2:30:46plan fell into place.
2:30:48The party would return without me, and
2:30:50to maintain that illusion of strength,
2:30:52Tamlin and Ianthe would lie about it,
2:30:55where I'd gone.
2:30:56And perhaps a day or two after that, one
2:30:59of these sentries would reveal the news.
2:31:01A carefully sprung trap that I'd coiled
2:31:03into his mind like one of my snares.
2:31:06I'd fled for my life after being nearly
2:31:09killed by the Hybern prince and
2:31:10princess. I'd planted images in his head
2:31:13of my brutalized body, the markings
2:31:15consistent with what Dagdan and Breonna
2:31:17had already revealed to be their style.
2:31:20He'd described them in detail, describe
2:31:22how he helped me get away before it was
2:31:24too late, how I ran for my life when
2:31:27Tamlin and Ianthe refused to intervene,
2:31:30to risk their alliance with Hybern.
2:31:32And when the sentry revealed the truth,
2:31:35no longer able to stomach keeping quiet
2:31:37when he saw how my sorry fate was
2:31:39concealed by Tamlin and Ianthe, just as
2:31:42Tamlin had sided with Ianthe the day
2:31:44he'd flogged that sentry.
2:31:46When he described what Hybern had done
2:31:48to me, their curse-breaker, their newly
2:31:51anointed cauldron-blessed before I'd
2:31:53fled for my life.
2:31:55There would be no further alliance, for
2:31:57there would be no sentry or denizen of
2:31:59this court who would stand with Tamlin
2:32:01or Ianthe after this, after me.
2:32:05I ducked into my tent to grab my pack,
2:32:07my steps light and swift, listening,
2:32:10barely breathing. I scanned the camp,
2:32:12the woods. A few seconds extra had me
2:32:15snatching Tamlin's bandolier of knives
2:32:17from where he'd left them inside his
2:32:18tent. They'd get in the way while using
2:32:21a bow and arrow, he'd explained that
2:32:22morning.
2:32:24Their weight was considerable as I flung
2:32:26it across my chest, Illyrian fighting
2:32:28knives.
2:32:29Home. I was going home.
2:32:32I didn't bother to look back at that
2:32:34camp as I slipped into the northern tree
2:32:36line. If I winnowed without stopping
2:32:38between leaps, I'd be at the foothills
2:32:40in an hour and would vanish through one
2:32:42of the caves not long after that.
2:32:45I made it about a hundred yards into the
2:32:47cover of trees before I halted.
2:32:50I heard Lucien first. Back off. A low
2:32:54female laugh. Everything in me went
2:32:56still and cold at that sound. I'd heard
2:32:59it once before in Rhysand's memory.
2:33:02Keep going. They were distracted,
2:33:04horrible as it was. Keep going. Keep
2:33:07going. Keep going.
2:33:09I thought you'd seek me out after the
2:33:11rite, Ianthe purred. They couldn't be
2:33:13more than 30 ft through the trees, far
2:33:16enough away not to hear my presence if I
2:33:18was quiet enough.
2:33:20I was obligated to perform the rite,"
2:33:22Lucien snapped. "That night wasn't the
2:33:25product of desire, believe me."
2:33:28"We had fun, you and I." "I'm a mated
2:33:31male now.
2:33:33Every second was the ringing of my death
2:33:34now. I'd primed everything to fall. I'd
2:33:37long since stopped feeling any sort of
2:33:39guilt or doubt about my plan, not with
2:33:41Alice now safely away. And yet
2:33:45and yet
2:33:46"You don't act that way with Feyre." A
2:33:49silk-wrapped threat. "You're mistaken."
2:33:52"Am I?" Twigs and leaves crunched as if
2:33:56she was circling him.
2:33:57"You put your hands all over her." I had
2:34:00done my job too well, provoked her
2:34:03jealousy too much. With every instance
2:34:05I'd found ways to get Lucien to touch me
2:34:07in her presence, in Tamlin's presence.
2:34:10"Do not touch me," he growled.
2:34:13And then I was moving. I masked the
2:34:15sound of my footfalls, silent as a
2:34:17panther as I stalked to the little
2:34:19clearing where they stood, where Lucien
2:34:21stood, backed against a tree. Twin bands
2:34:24of blue stone shackled around his
2:34:26wrists.
2:34:27I'd seen them before, on Rhys, to
2:34:30immobilize his power. Stone hewn from
2:34:32Hybern's rotted land, capable of
2:34:35nullifying magic, and in this case,
2:34:38holding Lucien against that tree as
2:34:40Ianthe surveyed him like a snake before
2:34:42a meal.
2:34:43She slid a hand over the broad planes of
2:34:45his chest, his stomach. And Lucien's
2:34:48eyes shot to me as I stepped between the
2:34:51trees, fear and humiliation reddening
2:34:53his golden skin. "That's enough," I
2:34:56said.
2:34:57Ianthe whipped her head to me. Her smile
2:35:00was innocent, simpering, but I saw her
2:35:02note the pack, Tamlin's bandolier,
2:35:05dismiss them.
2:35:07"We were in the middle of a game,
2:35:09weren't we, Lucien?"
2:35:10He didn't answer. And the sight of those
2:35:13shackles on him, however she'd trapped
2:35:15him, the sight of her hand still on his
2:35:17stomach.
2:35:19"We'll return to the camp when we're
2:35:20done." She said, turning to him again.
2:35:24Her hand slid lower, not for his own
2:35:26pleasure, but simply to throw it in my
2:35:28face that she could.
2:35:30I struck, not with my knives or magic,
2:35:33but my mind. I ripped down the shield
2:35:35I'd kept up around her to avoid the
2:35:37twins control and slammed myself into
2:35:40her consciousness.
2:35:41A mask over a face of decay. That's what
2:35:44it was like to go inside that beautiful
2:35:46head and find such hideous thoughts
2:35:48inside it.
2:35:49A trail of males she'd used her power on
2:35:52or outright forced to bed, convinced of
2:35:54her entitlement to them.
2:35:56I pulled back against the tug of those
2:35:58memories, mastering myself.
2:36:01"Take your hands off him." She did.
2:36:04"Unshackle him."
2:36:06Lucien's skin drained of color as Ianthe
2:36:08obeyed me, her face queerly vacant,
2:36:11pliant. The blue stone shackles thumped
2:36:14to the mossy ground.
2:36:16Lucien's shirt was askew, the top button
2:36:18on his pants already undone.
2:36:21The roaring that filled my mind was so
2:36:22loud I could barely hear myself as I
2:36:25said, "Pick up that rock."
2:36:27Lucien remained pressed against that
2:36:29tree, and he watched in silence as
2:36:32Ianthe stooped to pick up a gray, rough
2:36:34rock about the size of an apple.
2:36:37"Put your right hand on that boulder."
2:36:39She obeyed, though a tremor went down
2:36:41her spine.
2:36:43Her mind thrashed and struggled against
2:36:45me like a fish snared on a line. I dug
2:36:48my mental talons in deeper and some
2:36:50inner voice of hers began screaming.
2:36:53"Smash your hand with the rock as hard
2:36:55as you can, until I tell you to stop."
2:36:59The hand she'd put on him, on so many
2:37:01others.
2:37:03Ianthe brought the stone up. The first
2:37:05impact was a muffled, wet thud. The
2:37:08second was an actual crack. The third
2:37:10drew blood.
2:37:12Her arm rose and fell, her body
2:37:14shuddering with the agony, and I said to
2:37:17her very clearly, "You will never touch
2:37:19another person against their will. You
2:37:22will never convince yourself that they
2:37:23truly want your advances, that they're
2:37:25playing games. You will never know
2:37:27another's touch unless they initiate,
2:37:30unless it's desired by both sides."
2:37:33Thwack. Crack. Thud.
2:37:36"You will not remember what happened
2:37:37here. You will tell the others that you
2:37:39fell."
2:37:41Her ring finger had shifted in the wrong
2:37:42direction.
2:37:44"You are allowed to see a healer to set
2:37:46the bones, but not to erase the
2:37:48scarring. And every time you look at
2:37:50that hand, you are going to remember
2:37:52that touching people against their will
2:37:55has consequences. And if you do it
2:37:57again, everything you are will cease to
2:38:00exist. You will live with that terror
2:38:02every day and never know where it
2:38:04originates. Only the fear of something
2:38:07chasing you, hunting you, waiting for
2:38:10you the instant you let your guard
2:38:11down."
2:38:13Silent tears of pain flowed down her
2:38:15face.
2:38:17"You can stop now."
2:38:18The bloodied rock tumbled onto the
2:38:20grass. Her hand was little more than
2:38:22cracked bones wrapped in shredded skin.
2:38:26"Kneel here until someone finds you."
2:38:29Ianthe fell to her knees, her ruined
2:38:31hand leaking blood onto her pale robes.
2:38:35"I debated slitting your throat this
2:38:36morning," I told her. "I debated it all
2:38:39last night while you slept beside me.
2:38:42I've debated it every single day since I
2:38:44learned you sold out my sisters to
2:38:46Highburn." I smiled a bit.
2:38:49"But I think this is better punishment.
2:38:51And I hope you live a long, long life,
2:38:54Ianthe, and never know a moment's
2:38:57peace."
2:38:58I stared down at her for a moment
2:39:00longer, tying off the tapestry of words
2:39:03and commands I'd woven into her mind,
2:39:05and turned to Lucien.
2:39:07He'd fixed his pants, his shirt.
2:39:10His wide eyes slid from her to me, then
2:39:12to the bloodied stone.
2:39:15"The word you're looking for, Lucien,"
2:39:17crooned a deceptively light female
2:39:19voice,
2:39:20"is day ma ti."
2:39:22We whirled toward Breonna and Dagdan as
2:39:24they stepped into the clearing, grinning
2:39:26like wolves.
2:39:32Chapter 10
2:39:34Breonna ran her fingers through Ianthe's
2:39:36golden hair, clicking her tongue at the
2:39:38bloodied pulp cradled in her lap.
2:39:41"Going somewhere, Feyre?"
2:39:43I let my mask drop.
2:39:45"I have places to be," I told the Hybern
2:39:48royals, noting the flanking positions
2:39:50they were too casually establishing
2:39:52around me.
2:39:53"What could be more important than
2:39:54assisting us? You are, after all, sworn
2:39:58to assist our king."
2:40:00Time. Biding their time until Tamlin
2:40:02returned from hunting with Jurian.
2:40:05Lucien shoved off the tree, but didn't
2:40:07come to my side.
2:40:09Something like agony flickered across
2:40:10his face as he finally noted the stolen
2:40:13bandolier, the pack on my shoulders.
2:40:17"I have no allegiance to you," I told
2:40:19Breonna, even as Dagdan began to edge
2:40:21past my line of sight.
2:40:23"I am a free person, allowed to go where
2:40:26and when I will it."
2:40:28"Are you?" Breonna mused, sliding a hand
2:40:31to her sword at her hip.
2:40:33I pivoted slightly to keep Dagdan from
2:40:35slipping into my blind spot.
2:40:37"Such careful plotting these weeks, such
2:40:40skilled maneuvering. You didn't seem to
2:40:43worry that we'd be doing the same."
2:40:46They weren't letting Lucien leave this
2:40:47clearing alive, or at least with his
2:40:50mind intact.
2:40:52He seemed to realize it at the same
2:40:53moment I did, understanding that there
2:40:55was no way they'd reveal this without
2:40:57knowing they'd get away with it.
2:41:00"Take the Spring Court," I said, and
2:41:02meant it. "It's going to fall one way or
2:41:05another."
2:41:06Lucien snarled. I ignored him.
2:41:09"Oh, we intend to," Brianna said, sword
2:41:12inching free of its dark sheath.
2:41:14"But then, there's the matter of you."
2:41:17I thumbed free two of the Illyrian
2:41:19fighting knives.
2:41:20"Haven't you wondered at the headaches?
2:41:23How things seem a little muffled,
2:41:25uncertain mental bonds?"
2:41:28My powers had tired so swiftly, had
2:41:30become weaker and weaker these weeks.
2:41:33Dagdan snorted and finally observed to
2:41:35his sister, "I give her about 10 minutes
2:41:38before the apple sets in."
2:41:40Brianna chuckled, towing the blue stone
2:41:42shackle.
2:41:43"We gave the priestess the powder at
2:41:45first. Crushed faebane stone, ground so
2:41:48fine you couldn't see or scent or taste
2:41:51it in your food. She'd add a little at a
2:41:53time, nothing suspicious, not too much
2:41:56lest it stifle all your powers at once."
2:42:00Unease began to clench my gut.
2:42:02"We've been Day mati for a thousand
2:42:04years, girl," Dagdan sneered. "But we
2:42:07didn't even need to slip into her mind
2:42:09to get her to do our bidding. But you,
2:42:12what a valiant effort you put up trying
2:42:15to shield them all from us."
2:42:17Dagdan's mind speared for Lucien's. A
2:42:20dark arrow shot between them. I slammed
2:42:22up a shield between them, and my head,
2:42:25my very bones ached.
2:42:27"What apple?" I bit out. "The one you
2:42:30shoved down your throat an hour ago,"
2:42:33Brianna said. "Grown and tended in the
2:42:35king's personal garden, fed a steady
2:42:38diet of water laced with faebane, enough
2:42:41to knock out your powers for a few days
2:42:43straight, no shackles required. And here
2:42:46you are, thinking no one had noticed you
2:42:48planned to vanish today." She clicked
2:42:51her tongue again. "Our uncle would be
2:42:53most displeased if we allowed that to
2:42:55happen." I was running out of borrowed
2:42:57time. I could winnow, but then I'd
2:43:00abandon Lucien to them if he somehow
2:43:02couldn't manage to himself with the
2:43:04faebane in his system from the food at
2:43:06the camp.
2:43:07Leave him. I should and could leave him,
2:43:11but to a fate perhaps worse than death.
2:43:14His russet eye gleamed. Go.
2:43:17I made my choice. I exploded into night
2:43:19and smoke and shadow, and even a
2:43:21thousand years wasn't enough for Dagdan
2:43:24to adequately prepare as I winnowed in
2:43:26front of him and struck. I sliced
2:43:29through the front of his leather armor,
2:43:30not deep enough to kill, and as steel
2:43:33snagged on its plates, he twisted
2:43:35expertly, forcing me to either expose my
2:43:37right side or lose the knife.
2:43:40I winnowed again. This time, Dagdan went
2:43:42with me.
2:43:44I was not fighting Hybern cronies
2:43:46unaware in the woods. I was not fighting
2:43:48the Adar and its ilk in the streets of
2:43:50Velaris.
2:43:51Dagdan was a Hybern prince, a commander.
2:43:55He fought like one. Winnow, strike.
2:43:58Winnow, strike. We were a black
2:44:00whirlwind of steel and shadow through
2:44:02the clearing, and months of Cassian's
2:44:04brutal training clicked into place as I
2:44:06kept my feet under me.
2:44:08I had the vague sense of Lucien gaping,
2:44:10even Breonna taken aback by my show of
2:44:13skill against her brother.
2:44:15But Dagdan's blows weren't hard. No,
2:44:17they were precise and swift, but he
2:44:20didn't throw himself into it wholly.
2:44:22Buying time. Wearing me down until my
2:44:25body fully absorbed that apple and its
2:44:27power rendered me nearly mortal.
2:44:30So, I hit him where he was weakest.
2:44:32Breonna screamed as a wall of flame
2:44:34slammed into her. Dagdan lost his focus
2:44:37for all of a heartbeat. His roar as I
2:44:39sliced deep into his abdomen shook the
2:44:41birds from the trees. "You little
2:44:44bitch." he spat, dancing back from my
2:44:47next blow as the fire cleared, and
2:44:49Breonna was revealed on her knees. Her
2:44:51physical shield had been sloppy. She'd
2:44:54expected me to attack her mind.
2:44:56She was shuddering, gasping with agony.
2:44:59The reek of charred skin now drifted to
2:45:01us directly from her right arm, her
2:45:03ribs, her thigh.
2:45:05Dagdan lunged for me again, and I
2:45:07brought up both of my knives to meet his
2:45:09blade. He didn't pull the blow this
2:45:11time. I felt its reverberation in every
2:45:14inch of my body.
2:45:16Felt the rising, stifling silence, too.
2:45:19I felt it once before, that day in
2:45:21Highburn.
2:45:23Branna surged to her feet with a sharp
2:45:25cry, but Lucien was there. Her focus
2:45:28wholly on me, on taking me from the
2:45:30beauty I'd burned from her, Branna did
2:45:32not see him winnow until it was too
2:45:34late, until Lucien's sword refracted the
2:45:37light of the sun leaking through the
2:45:38canopy, and then met flesh and bone.
2:45:41A tremor shuddered through the clearing,
2:45:43like some thread between the twins had
2:45:45been snipped, as Branna's dark head
2:45:47thudded onto the grass.
2:45:50Dagdan screamed, launching himself at
2:45:52Lucien, winnowing across the 15 ft
2:45:54between us.
2:45:56Lucien had barely heaved his blade out
2:45:58of Branna's severed neck when Dagdan was
2:46:00before him, sword shoving forward to ram
2:46:03through his throat. Lucien only had
2:46:05enough time to stumble back from
2:46:07Dagdan's killing blow.
2:46:09I had enough time to stop it. I parried
2:46:11Dagdan's blade aside with one knife, the
2:46:13male's eyes going wide as I winnowed
2:46:15between them, and punched the other into
2:46:18his eye, right into the skull behind it.
2:46:21Bone and blood and soft tissue scraped
2:46:23and slid along the blade. Dagdan's mouth
2:46:26still open with surprise as I yanked out
2:46:28the knife.
2:46:29I let him fall atop his sister, the thud
2:46:32of flesh on flesh the only sound.
2:46:35I merely looked at Ianthe, my power
2:46:38guttering, a hideous ache building in my
2:46:40gut, and made my last command, amending
2:46:43my earlier ones.
2:46:45You tell them I killed them in
2:46:47self-defense after they hurt me so badly
2:46:50while you and Tamlin did nothing. Even
2:46:52when they torture you for the truth, you
2:46:54say that I fled after I killed them to
2:46:57save this court from their horrors.
2:47:00Blank, vacant eyes were my only answer.
2:47:03Feyre. Lucien's voice was a hoarse rasp.
2:47:07I merely wiped my two knives on Dagdan's
2:47:09back before going to reclaim my fallen
2:47:11pack.
2:47:13You're going back to the night court. I
2:47:16shouldered my heavy pack and finally
2:47:18looked at him. Yes.
2:47:20His tanned face had paled, but he
2:47:23surveyed Ianthe, the two dead royals.
2:47:26I'm going with you. No, was all I said
2:47:29heading for the trees. A cramp formed
2:47:32deep in my belly. I had to get away, had
2:47:34to use the last of my power to winnow to
2:47:36the hills. You won't make it without
2:47:39magic, he warned me. I just gritted my
2:47:42teeth against the sharp pain in my
2:47:44abdomen as I rallied my strength to
2:47:46winnow to those distant foothills, but
2:47:48Lucien gripped my arm halting me. I'm
2:47:51going with you, he said again, face
2:47:54splattered with blood as bright as his
2:47:56hair. I'm getting my mate back.
2:47:59There was no time for this argument, for
2:48:01the truth and debate and the answers I
2:48:03saw he desperately wanted.
2:48:05Tamlin and the others would have heard
2:48:07the shouting by now. Don't make me
2:48:09regret this, I told him.
2:48:14Blood coated the inside of my mouth by
2:48:16the time we reached the foothills hours
2:48:18later. I was panting, my head throbbing,
2:48:22my stomach a twisting knot of aching.
2:48:24Lucien was barely better off, his
2:48:27winnowing as shaky as my own before we
2:48:29halted amongst the rolling green and he
2:48:31doubled over, hands braced on his knees.
2:48:34It's gone, he said gasping for breath.
2:48:38My magic. Not an ember. They must have
2:48:42dosed all of us today
2:48:44and given me a poisoned apple just to
2:48:46make sure it kept me down.
2:48:48My power pulled away from me like a wave
2:48:50reeling back from the shore. Only there
2:48:53was no return. It just went farther and
2:48:55farther out into a sea of nothing.
2:48:58I peered at the sun, now a handsbreadth
2:49:00above the horizon, shadows already thick
2:49:03and heavy between the hills.
2:49:05I took my bearings, sorting through the
2:49:07knowledge I'd compiled these weeks.
2:49:10I stepped northward, swaying. Lucien
2:49:13gripped my arm.
2:49:14You're taking a door. I slid aching eyes
2:49:17toward him. Yes. The caves, doors they
2:49:21called them in those hollows, led to
2:49:23other pockets of Prythian. I'd taken one
2:49:25straight under the mountain. I would now
2:49:28take one to get me home, or as close to
2:49:30it as I could get.
2:49:31No door to the Night Court existed here
2:49:34or anywhere, and I would not risk my
2:49:36friends by bringing them here to
2:49:38retrieve me. No matter that the bond
2:49:40between Rhys and me, I couldn't so much
2:49:42as feel it. A numbness had spread
2:49:45through me. I needed to get out now. The
2:49:48Autumn Court portal is that way. Warning
2:49:51and reproach. I can't go into summer.
2:49:54They'll kill me on site.
2:49:56Silence. He released my arm. I
2:49:59swallowed, my throat so dry I could
2:50:01barely do so. The only other door here
2:50:04leads under the mountain. We sealed off
2:50:06all the other entrances. If we go there,
2:50:09we could wind up trapped or have to
2:50:11return.
2:50:13Then we go to autumn, and from there
2:50:16I trailed off before I finished. Home.
2:50:19But Lucien gleaned it anyway and seemed
2:50:21to realize then that's what the Night
2:50:23Court was. Home.
2:50:26I could almost see the word in his
2:50:27russet eye as he shook his head. Later.
2:50:31I gave him a silent nod. Yes, later we'd
2:50:34have it all out.
2:50:36The Autumn Court will be as dangerous as
2:50:38Summer, he warned. I just need somewhere
2:50:41to hide, to lie low until
2:50:44until we can winnow again.
2:50:46A faint buzzing and ringing filled my
2:50:48ears, and I felt my magic vanish
2:50:50entirely.
2:50:52"I know a place," Lucien said, walking
2:50:55toward the cave that would take us to
2:50:56his home, to the lands of the family
2:50:59who'd betrayed him as badly as this
2:51:01court had betrayed mine.
2:51:03We hurried through the hills, swift and
2:51:05silent as shadows.
2:51:07The cave to the Autumn Court had been
2:51:08left unguarded. Lucien looked at me over
2:51:11his shoulder as if to ask if I, too, had
2:51:13been responsible for the lack of guards
2:51:15who were always stationed here.
2:51:17I gave him another nod.
2:51:19I'd slid into their minds before we'd
2:51:21left, making sure this door would be
2:51:23left open.
2:51:24Cassian had taught me always to have a
2:51:26second escape route, always.
2:51:29Lucien paused before the swirling gloom
2:51:31of the cave mouth, the blackness like a
2:51:34worm poised to devour us both. A muscle
2:51:37feathered in his jaw. I said, "Stay if
2:51:40you want. What's done is done."
2:51:43For Hybern was coming, already here.
2:51:46I had debated it for weeks, whether it
2:51:48was better to claim the Spring Court for
2:51:50ourselves or to let it fall to our
2:51:52enemies.
2:51:53But it could not remain neutral, a
2:51:55barrier between our forces in the north
2:51:57and the humans in the south. It would
2:51:59have been easy to call in Rhys and
2:52:01Cassian, to have the latter bring in an
2:52:03Illyrian legion to claim the territory
2:52:06when it was weakest after my own
2:52:07maneuverings,
2:52:09depending on how much mobility Cassian
2:52:11had retained, if he was still healing.
2:52:14Yet then we'd hold one territory with
2:52:16five other courts between us.
2:52:19Sympathy might have swayed for the
2:52:20Spring Court. Others might have joined
2:52:22Hybern against us, considering our
2:52:25conquest here proof of our wickedness.
2:52:27But if Spring fell to Hybern, we could
2:52:30rally the other courts to us. Charge as
2:52:32one from the north, drawing Hybern in
2:52:35close.
2:52:36You were right, Lucien declared at last.
2:52:40That girl I knew did die under the
2:52:42mountain.
2:52:43I wasn't sure if it was an insult, but I
2:52:45nodded all the same.
2:52:47At least we can agree on that. I stepped
2:52:50into the awaiting cold and dark. Lucien
2:52:53fell into step beside me as we strode
2:52:56beneath the archway of carved crude
2:52:58stone, our blades out as we left behind
2:53:00the warmth and green of eternal spring.
2:53:03And in the distance, so faint I thought
2:53:06I might have imagined it, a beast's roar
2:53:09cleaved the land.
2:53:14Part two. Cursebreaker.
2:53:20Chapter 11.
2:53:23The cold was what hit me first. Brisk,
2:53:26crisp cold laced with loam and rotting
2:53:29things.
2:53:30In the twilight, the world beyond the
2:53:32narrow cave mouth was a lattice work of
2:53:34red and gold and brown and green. The
2:53:37trees thick and old, the mossy ground
2:53:39strewn with rocks and boulders that cast
2:53:41long shadows.
2:53:43We emerged, blades out, barely breathing
2:53:46beyond a trickle of air.
2:53:48But there were no Autumn Court sentries
2:53:50guarding the entrance to Beron's realm,
2:53:52none that we could see or scent.
2:53:55Without my magic, I was blind again,
2:53:57unable to sweep a net of awareness
2:53:59through the ancient vibrant trees to
2:54:01catch any traces of nearby fae minds.
2:54:04Utterly helpless. That's how I'd been
2:54:07before. How I'd survived so long without
2:54:10it, I didn't want to consider.
2:54:12We crept on cat-soft feet into the moss
2:54:15and stone and wood, our breath curling
2:54:18in front of us.
2:54:19Keep moving. Keep striding north. Rhys
2:54:22would have realized by now that our bond
2:54:24had gone dark, was likely trying to
2:54:26glean whether I had planned for that,
2:54:28whether it was worth the risk of
2:54:30revealing our scheming to find me.
2:54:32But until he did, until he could hear
2:54:35me, find me, I had to keep moving.
2:54:39So, I let Lucien lead the way, wishing
2:54:41I'd at least been able to shift my eyes
2:54:43to something that could pierce the
2:54:44darkening wood.
2:54:46But my magic was still and frozen, a
2:54:48crutch I'd become too reliant upon.
2:54:51We picked our way through the forest,
2:54:53the chill deepening with each vanishing
2:54:55shaft of sunlight.
2:54:57We hadn't spoken since we'd entered that
2:54:59cave between courts. From the stiffness
2:55:01of his shoulders, the hard angle of his
2:55:03jaw as he moved on silent, steady feet,
2:55:06I knew only our need for stealth kept
2:55:08his simmering questions at bay.
2:55:11Night was fully overhead, the moon not
2:55:14yet risen, when he led us into another
2:55:16cave.
2:55:17I balked at the entrance.
2:55:19Lucien merely said, voice flat and as
2:55:22icy as the air,
2:55:24"It doesn't lead anywhere. It curves
2:55:26away in the back. It'll keep us out of
2:55:28sight."
2:55:30I let him go inside first, nonetheless.
2:55:33Every limb and movement turned sluggish,
2:55:36aching, but I trailed him into the cave
2:55:38and around the bend he'd indicated.
2:55:41Flint struck, and I found myself gazing
2:55:44at a makeshift camp of sorts.
2:55:46The candle Lucien had ignited sat on a
2:55:48natural stone ledge, and on the floor
2:55:51nearby lay three bedrolls and old
2:55:53blankets crusted with leaves and
2:55:55cobwebs.
2:55:56A little fire pit lay in the smoked
2:55:58center of the space, the ceiling above
2:56:00it charred.
2:56:01No one had been here in months, years.
2:56:05"I used to stay here while hunting
2:56:08before I left," he said, examining a
2:56:11dusty leather-bound book left on the
2:56:13stone ledge beside the candle.
2:56:15He set the tome down with a thump.
2:56:18"It's just for the night. We'll find
2:56:20something to eat in the morning.
2:56:23I only lifted the closest bedroll and
2:56:25smacked it a few times, leaves and
2:56:27clouds of dust flying off before I laid
2:56:29it upon the ground.
2:56:32You truly planned this, he said at last.
2:56:35I sat on the bedroll and began sorting
2:56:38through my pack, calling out the warmer
2:56:40clothes, food, and supplies Alice
2:56:42herself had placed within.
2:56:44Yes.
2:56:46That's all you have to say?
2:56:48I sniffed at the food, wondering what
2:56:50was laced with faebane. It could be in
2:56:52everything.
2:56:54It's too risky to eat, I admitted,
2:56:56evading his question. Lucien was having
2:56:59none of it.
2:57:00I knew. I knew you were lying the moment
2:57:03you unleashed that light in Hybern. My
2:57:06friend at the Dawn Court has the same
2:57:07power. Her light is identical, and it
2:57:10does not do whatever horse [ __ ] you lied
2:57:12about it doing. I shoved my pack off my
2:57:14bedroll. Then why not tell him? You were
2:57:17his faithful dog in every other sense.
2:57:20His eyes seemed to simmer as if being in
2:57:23his own lands set that molten ore inside
2:57:25him rising to the surface, even with the
2:57:28damper on his power. Glad to see the
2:57:30mask is off, at least. Indeed, I let him
2:57:33see it all. Didn't alter or shape my
2:57:36face into anything but coldness. Lucien
2:57:39snorted. I didn't tell him for two
2:57:41reasons. One, it felt like kicking a
2:57:44male already down. I couldn't take that
2:57:46hope away from him. I rolled my eyes.
2:57:49Two, he snapped. I knew if I was correct
2:57:53and called you on it, you'd find a way
2:57:55to make sure I never saw her.
2:57:58My nails dug into my palms hard enough
2:58:00to hurt, but I remained seated on the
2:58:02bedroll as I bared my teeth at him. And
2:58:05that's why you're here. Not because it's
2:58:07right and he's always been wrong, but
2:58:09just so you can get what you think
2:58:10you're owed.
2:58:12She is my mate, and in my enemy's hands.
2:58:15I've made no secret from the start that
2:58:17Elaine is safe and cared for.
2:58:20And I'm supposed to believe you? Yes, I
2:58:23hissed, you are. Because if I believed
2:58:26for one moment that my sisters were in
2:58:27danger, no High Lord or King would have
2:58:30kept me from going to save them. He just
2:58:33shook his head, the candle light dancing
2:58:35over his hair. You have the gall to
2:58:37question my priorities regarding Elaine.
2:58:40Yet what was your motive where I was
2:58:41concerned? Did you plan to spare me from
2:58:44your path of destruction because of any
2:58:46genuine friendship or simply for fear of
2:58:48what it might do to her?
2:58:51I didn't answer.
2:58:52Well, what was your grand plan for me
2:58:55before I intervened?
2:58:57I pulled at a stray thread in the
2:58:58bedroll.
2:59:00You would have been fine, was all I
2:59:02said.
2:59:03And what about Tamlin? Did you plan to
2:59:06disembowel him before you left and
2:59:08simply not get the chance?
2:59:10I ripped the loose thread right out of
2:59:12the bedroll. I debated it.
2:59:15But
2:59:16But I think letting his court collapse
2:59:18around him is a better punishment.
2:59:20Certainly longer than an easy death.
2:59:23I slung off Tamlin's bandolier of
2:59:24knives, leather scraping against the
2:59:26rough stone floor.
2:59:28You're his emissary. Surely you realize
2:59:31that slitting his throat, however
2:59:33satisfying, wouldn't win us many allies
2:59:35in this war.
2:59:37No. It would give Hybern too many
2:59:39openings to undermine us.
2:59:41He crossed his arms, digging in for a
2:59:43good long fight. Before he could do just
2:59:46that, I cut in. I'm tired and our voices
2:59:50echo. Let's have it out when it's not
2:59:52likely to get us caught and killed.
2:59:54His gaze was a brand, but I ignored it
2:59:57as I nestled down on the bedroll, the
2:59:59material reeking of dust and rot.
3:00:02I pulled my cloak over me, but didn't
3:00:04close my eyes.
3:00:06I didn't dare sleep, not when he might
3:00:08very well change his mind.
3:00:10Yet just lying down, not moving, not
3:00:13thinking, some of the tightness in my
3:00:15body eased.
3:00:17Lucien blew out the candle and I
3:00:19listened to the sounds of him settling
3:00:21down as well. "My father will hunt you
3:00:23for taking his power if he finds out."
3:00:26He said into the frigid dark. "And kill
3:00:29you for learning how to wield it."
3:00:31"He can get in line." Was all I said.
3:00:37My exhaustion was a blanket over my
3:00:39senses as gray light stained the cave
3:00:41walls. I'd spent most of the night
3:00:44shivering, jolting at every snap and
3:00:46sound in the forest outside, keenly
3:00:48aware of Lucien's movements on his
3:00:50bedroll.
3:00:51From his own haggard face as he sat up,
3:00:54I knew he hadn't slept either. Perhaps
3:00:56wondering if I'd abandon him or if his
3:00:59family would find us first or mine.
3:01:02We took each other's measure.
3:01:04"What now?" He rasped, scrubbing a broad
3:01:07hand over his face.
3:01:09Rhys had not come. I had not heard a
3:01:12whisper of him down the bond.
3:01:14I felt for my magic but only ashes
3:01:16greeted me.
3:01:18"We head north." I said, "Until the
3:01:20faebane is out of our systems and we can
3:01:22winnow." "Or I could contact Rhys and
3:01:25the others. My father's court lies due
3:01:27northward. We'll have to go to the east
3:01:30or west to avoid it." "No. East takes us
3:01:33too close to the summer court border and
3:01:35I won't lose time by going too far west.
3:01:38We go straight north."
3:01:40"My father's sentries will easily spot
3:01:42us."
3:01:43"Then we'll have to remain unseen." I
3:01:45said, rising. I dumped the last of the
3:01:48contaminated food from my pack. Let the
3:01:50scavengers have it.
3:01:55Walking through the woods of the autumn
3:01:56court felt like striding inside a jewel
3:01:58box. Even with all that potentially
3:02:01hunted us now, the colors were so vivid
3:02:03it was an effort not to gawk and gape.
3:02:06By midmorning, the rime had melted away
3:02:09under the buttery sun to reveal what was
3:02:11suitable for eating. My stomach growled
3:02:14with every step, and Lucien's red hair
3:02:16gleamed like the leaves above us as he
3:02:18scanned the woods for anything to fill
3:02:20our bellies. His woods, by blood and
3:02:23law. He was a son of this forest, and
3:02:26here he looked crafted from it, for it,
3:02:30even that gold eye.
3:02:32Lucien eventually stopped at a jade
3:02:34stream winding through a granite-flanked
3:02:36gully, a spot he claimed had once been
3:02:38rich with trout.
3:02:40I was in the process of constructing a
3:02:42rudimentary fishing pole when he waded
3:02:44into the stream, boots off and pants
3:02:47rolled to his knees, and caught one with
3:02:49his bare hands.
3:02:51He'd tied his hair up, a few strands of
3:02:53it falling into his face as he swooped
3:02:55down again and threw a second trout onto
3:02:57the sandy bank, where I'd been trying to
3:02:59find a substitute for fishing twine.
3:03:02We remained silent as the fish
3:03:04eventually stopped flapping, their sides
3:03:07catching and gleaming with all the
3:03:08colors so bright above us.
3:03:11Lucien picked them up by their tails as
3:03:13if he'd done it a thousand times. He
3:03:16might very well have, right here in this
3:03:18stream.
3:03:20"I'll clean them while you start the
3:03:21fire."
3:03:23In the daylight, the glow of the flames
3:03:25wouldn't be noticed, though the smoke, a
3:03:28necessary risk.
3:03:30We worked and ate in silence, the
3:03:32crackling fire offering the only
3:03:34conversation.
3:03:38We hiked north for 5 days, hardly
3:03:40exchanging a word.
3:03:42Barren Seat was so vast it took us 3
3:03:44days to enter, pass through, and clear
3:03:47it.
3:03:48Lucien led us through the outskirts,
3:03:50tense at every call and rustle.
3:03:52The forest house was a sprawling
3:03:54complex, Lucien informed me during the
3:03:56few times we risked or bothered to speak
3:03:58to each other.
3:04:00It had been built in and around the
3:04:01trees and rocks, and only its uppermost
3:04:04levels were visible above the ground.
3:04:06Below, it tunneled a few levels into the
3:04:09stone, but its sprawl generated its
3:04:11size. You might walk from one end of the
3:04:14house to the other, and it would take
3:04:15you half the morning. There were layers
3:04:18and circles of centuries ringing it, in
3:04:20the trees, on the ground, atop the
3:04:22moss-coated shingles and stones of the
3:04:24house itself.
3:04:26No enemies approached Baron's home
3:04:28without his knowledge. None left without
3:04:30his permission.
3:04:32I knew we'd passed beyond Lucien's known
3:04:34map of their patrol routes and stations
3:04:37when his shoulders sagged. Mine were
3:04:39slumped already.
3:04:41I had barely slept, only letting myself
3:04:43do so when Lucien's breathing slid into
3:04:45a different, deeper rhythm.
3:04:47I knew I couldn't keep it up for long,
3:04:50but without the ability to shield, to
3:04:52sense any danger,
3:04:54I wondered if Rhys was looking for me,
3:04:56if he'd felt the silence.
3:04:58I should have gotten a message out, told
3:05:01him I was going and how to find me.
3:05:03The faebane. That was why the bond had
3:05:06sounded so muffled.
3:05:08Perhaps I should have killed Ianthe
3:05:09outright.
3:05:11But what was done was done.
3:05:13I rubbed at my aching eyes, taking a
3:05:15moment's rest beneath our new bounty, an
3:05:18apple tree weighted with fat, succulent
3:05:20fruit.
3:05:21I'd filled my bag with what I could fit
3:05:23inside. Two cores already lay discarded
3:05:26beside me. The sweet, rotting scent as
3:05:29lulling as the droning of the bees
3:05:30gorging themselves on fallen apples. A
3:05:33third apple was already primed and
3:05:35poised for eating atop my outstretched
3:05:37legs.
3:05:38After what the Hybern royals had done, I
3:05:41should have sworn off apples forever,
3:05:43but hunger had always blurred lines for
3:05:45me.
3:05:47Lucien, sitting a few feet away, chucked
3:05:49his fourth apple into the bushes as I
3:05:51bit into mine.
3:05:53"The farmlands and fields are near," he
3:05:56announced. "We'll have to stay out of
3:05:58sight. My father doesn't pay well for
3:06:00his crops, and the land workers will
3:06:02earn any extra coin they can.
3:06:05Even selling out the location of one of
3:06:07the high lord's sons?
3:06:09Especially that way.
3:06:12They didn't like you?
3:06:13His jaw tightened.
3:06:15As the youngest of seven sons, I wasn't
3:06:18particularly needed or wanted. Perhaps
3:06:21it was a good thing.
3:06:22I was able to study for longer than my
3:06:24father allowed my brothers before
3:06:26shoving them out the door to rule over
3:06:28some territory within our lands. And I
3:06:30could train for as long as I liked,
3:06:33since no one believed I'd be dumb enough
3:06:35to kill my way up the long list of
3:06:37heirs.
3:06:38And when I grew bored with studying and
3:06:40fighting,
3:06:41I learned what I could of the land from
3:06:43its people. Learned about the people,
3:06:45too.
3:06:47He eased to his feet with a groan, his
3:06:49unbound hair glimmering as the midday
3:06:51sun overhead set the blood and wine hues
3:06:53aglow.
3:06:55I'd say that sounds more high lord-like
3:06:57than the life of an idle unwanted son.
3:07:01A long steely look.
3:07:03Did you think it was mere hatred that
3:07:05prompted my brothers to do their best to
3:07:07break and kill me?
3:07:09Despite myself, a shudder rippled down
3:07:11my spine.
3:07:13I finished off the apple and uncoiled to
3:07:15my feet, plucking another off a
3:07:16low-hanging branch.
3:07:19Would you want it? Your father's crown?
3:07:22No one's ever asked me that, Lucien
3:07:25mused as we moved on, dodging fallen
3:07:27rotting apples. The air was sticky
3:07:30sweet.
3:07:31The bloodshed that would be required to
3:07:33earn that crown wouldn't be worth it.
3:07:35Neither would its festering court. I'd
3:07:38gain a crown only to rule over a crafty,
3:07:40two-faced people.
3:07:42Lord of foxes, I said, snorting as I
3:07:45remembered that mask he'd once worn.
3:07:48But you never answered my question about
3:07:50why the people here would sell you out.
3:07:53The air ahead lightened, and a golden
3:07:55field of barley undulated toward a
3:07:57distant tree line.
3:07:59After Jessamyn,
3:08:01they would.
3:08:02Jessamyn, he'd never spoken her name.
3:08:06Lucien slid between the swaying bobbing
3:08:08stalks.
3:08:10She was one of them.
3:08:11The words were barely audible over the
3:08:13sighing barley, and when I didn't
3:08:16protect her,
3:08:17it was a betrayal of their trust, too. I
3:08:20ran to some of their houses while
3:08:22fleeing my brothers. They turned me out
3:08:24for what I let happen to her.
3:08:27Waves of gold and ivory rolled around
3:08:29us, the sky a crisp unmarked blue.
3:08:33"I can't blame them for it." he said.
3:08:38We cleared the fertile valley by the
3:08:40late afternoon. When Lucien offered to
3:08:42stop for the night, I insisted we keep
3:08:45going, right into the steep foothills
3:08:47that leaped into gray snow-capped
3:08:49mountains that marked the start of the
3:08:51shared range with the winter court.
3:08:54If we could get over the border in a day
3:08:55or two, perhaps my powers would have
3:08:57returned enough to contact Rhys or
3:09:00winnow the rest of the way home.
3:09:03The hike wasn't an easy one. Great
3:09:05craggy boulders made up the ascent,
3:09:07flecked with moss and long white grasses
3:09:10that hissed like adders. The wind ripped
3:09:12at our hair, the temperature dropping
3:09:14the higher we climbed. Tonight,
3:09:17we might have to risk a fire tonight
3:09:20just to stay alive.
3:09:22Lucien was panting as we scaled a
3:09:24hulking boulder, the valley sprawling
3:09:26away behind, the wood a tangled river of
3:09:29color beyond it. There had to be a pass
3:09:31into the range at some point, out of
3:09:34sight. "How are you not winded?" he
3:09:38panted, hauling himself onto the flat
3:09:40top. I shoved back the hair that had
3:09:43torn free of my braid to whip my my
3:09:46"I trained."
3:09:47"I gathered that much after you took on
3:09:50Dagdan and walked away from it. I had
3:09:52the element of surprise on my side.
3:09:55No, Lucien said quietly as I reached for
3:09:58a foothold in the next boulder.
3:10:01That was all you.
3:10:02My nails barked as I dug my fingers into
3:10:05the rock and heaved myself up. Lucien
3:10:08added,
3:10:09You had my back with them, with Ianthe.
3:10:13Thank you.
3:10:15The words hit something low in my gut
3:10:17and I was glad for the wind that kept
3:10:19roaring around us, if only to hide the
3:10:21burning in my eyes.
3:10:26I slept, finally, with the crackling
3:10:29fire in our latest cave. The heat and
3:10:31the relative remoteness were enough to
3:10:33finally drag me under.
3:10:35And in my dreams, I think I swam through
3:10:38Lucien's mind as if some small ember of
3:10:41my power was at last returning.
3:10:43I dreamed of our cozy fire and the
3:10:45craggy walls, the entire space barely
3:10:48big enough to fit us and the fire.
3:10:51I dreamed of the howling dark night
3:10:52beyond, of all the sounds that Lucien so
3:10:55carefully sorted through while he kept
3:10:57watch.
3:10:58His attention slid to me at one point
3:11:00and lingered.
3:11:02I had never known how young, how human I
3:11:05looked when I slept.
3:11:07My braid was a rope over my shoulder, my
3:11:09mouth slightly parted, my face haggard
3:11:12with days of little rest and food.
3:11:15I dreamed that he removed his cloak and
3:11:17added it over my blanket.
3:11:19Then I ebbed away, flowing out of his
3:11:21head as my dreams shifted and sailed
3:11:24elsewhere. I let a sea of stars rock me
3:11:27into sleep.
3:11:31A hand gripped my face so hard the
3:11:33groaning of my bones jolted me awake.
3:11:35Look who we found, a cold male voice
3:11:38drawled.
3:11:40I knew that face, the red hair, the pale
3:11:42skin, the smirk. Knew the faces of the
3:11:45other two males in the cave, a snarling
3:11:47Lucien pinned beneath them.
3:11:50His brothers.
3:11:55Chapter 12
3:11:57"Father," the one now holding a knife to
3:12:00my throat said to Lucien, "is rather put
3:12:02out that you didn't stop by to say
3:12:04hello."
3:12:06"We're on an errand and can't be
3:12:07delayed." Lucien answered smoothly,
3:12:10mastering himself. That knife pressed a
3:12:13fraction harder into my skin as he let
3:12:15out a humorless laugh.
3:12:17"Right. Rumor has it you two have run
3:12:20off together," chuckled Ianthe and
3:12:21Tamlin. His grin widened. "I didn't
3:12:24think you had it [clears throat] in you,
3:12:25little brother."
3:12:27"He had it in her, it seems," one of the
3:12:29others sniggered. I slid my gaze to the
3:12:32male above me. "You will release us. Our
3:12:35esteemed father wishes to see you," he
3:12:38said with a snake smile. The knife
3:12:41didn't waver. "So, you will come with us
3:12:43to his home."
3:12:45"Eris," Lucien warned. The name clanged
3:12:48through me. Above me, mere inches away,
3:12:52Moore's former betrothed. The male who
3:12:54had abandoned her when he found her
3:12:56brutalized body on the border, the High
3:12:59Lord's heir.
3:13:00I could have sworn phantom talons bit
3:13:02into my palms.
3:13:04A day or two more and I might have been
3:13:06able to slash them across his throat.
3:13:09But I didn't have that time. I only had
3:13:11now. I had to make it count. Eris merely
3:13:15said to me, cold and bored, "Get up."
3:13:18I felt it then, stirring awake as if
3:13:21some stick had poked it, as if being
3:13:24here in this territory, amongst its
3:13:26blooded royals, had somehow sparked it
3:13:28to life, boiling past that poison,
3:13:31turning that poison to steam.
3:13:34With his knife still angled against my
3:13:35neck, I let Eris haul me to my feet, the
3:13:38other two dragging Lucien before he
3:13:40could stand on his own.
3:13:42Make it count. Use my surroundings.
3:13:45I caught Lucien's eye, and he saw the
3:13:48sweat beading on my temple, my upper
3:13:50lip, as my blood heated.
3:13:52A slight bob of his chin was his only
3:13:54sign of understanding. Eris would bring
3:13:57us to Beron, and the High Lord would
3:13:59either kill us for sport, sell us to the
3:14:01highest bidder, or hold us indefinitely.
3:14:04And after what they had done to Lucien's
3:14:06lover, what they'd done to Mor,
3:14:09"After you," Eris said smoothly,
3:14:12lowering that knife at last. He shoved
3:14:14me a step. I'd been waiting. Balance,
3:14:17Cassian had taught me, was crucial to
3:14:19winning a fight.
3:14:21And as Eris's shove caused him to get on
3:14:23uneven footing, I turned my propelled
3:14:25step on him, twisting so fast he didn't
3:14:28see me get into his open guard. I drove
3:14:31my elbow into his nose. Eris stumbled
3:14:33back. Flames slammed into the other two,
3:14:37and Lucien hurtled out of the way as
3:14:38they shouted and fell deeper into the
3:14:40cave. I unleashed every drop of the
3:14:43flame in me, a wall of it between us and
3:14:45them, sealing his brothers inside the
3:14:47cave. "Run!" I gasped out, but Lucien
3:14:51was already at my side, a steadying hand
3:14:54under my arm as I burned that flame
3:14:56hotter and hotter. It wouldn't keep them
3:14:58contained for long, and I could indeed
3:15:00feel someone's power rising to challenge
3:15:02mine.
3:15:03But there was another force to wield it.
3:15:06Lucien understood the same moment I did.
3:15:08Sweat simmered on Lucien's brow as a
3:15:10pulse of flame-licked power slammed into
3:15:13the stones just above us. Dust and
3:15:15debris rained down. I threw any trickle
3:15:18of magic into Lucien's next blow, his
3:15:20next, as Eris's livid face emerged from
3:15:23my net of flame, glowing like a newly
3:15:26forged god of wrath. Lucien and I
3:15:28brought down the cave ceiling. Fire
3:15:31burst through the small cracks like a
3:15:32thousand flaming serpents' tongues, but
3:15:35the cave end did not so much as tremble.
3:15:37"Hurry," Lucien panted, and I didn't
3:15:40waste breath agreeing as we staggered
3:15:42into the night. Our packs, our weapons,
3:15:45our food, all inside that cave.
3:15:48I had two daggers on me, Lucien one. I'd
3:15:51been wearing my cloak, but he'd indeed
3:15:54given me his.
3:15:55He shivered against the cold as we
3:15:57dragged and clawed our way up the
3:15:59mountain slope and did not dare stop.
3:16:05Had I still remained human, I would have
3:16:07been dead. The cold was bone deep, the
3:16:10screaming wind lashing us like burning
3:16:12whips. My teeth clacked against each
3:16:14other, my fingers so stiff I could
3:16:16scarcely grapple onto the icy granite.
3:16:18With each mile we staggered through the
3:16:20mountains, perhaps both of us were
3:16:22spared from an icy death by the kernel
3:16:24of flame that had just barely kindled
3:16:26inside our veins.
3:16:28We didn't pause once, an unspoken fear
3:16:31that if we did, the cold would leech any
3:16:33lingering warmth and we'd never again
3:16:35move, or Lucien's brothers would gain
3:16:37ground. I tried, over and over, to shout
3:16:41down the bond to Reese, to Winnow, to
3:16:43grow wings and attempt to fly us out of
3:16:45the mountain pass we trudged through.
3:16:47The snow waist deep and so densely
3:16:50packed in places we had to crawl over
3:16:52it, our skin scraped raw from the ice.
3:16:55But the faebane's stifling grip still
3:16:57held the majority of my power in check.
3:17:00We had to be close to the Winter Court
3:17:02border, I told myself, as we squinted
3:17:04against a blast of icy wind through the
3:17:06other end of the narrow mountain pass.
3:17:09Close. And once we were over it, Eris
3:17:11and the others wouldn't dare set foot
3:17:13into another court's territory.
3:17:16My muscles screamed with every step, my
3:17:18boots soaked through with snow, my feet
3:17:21perilously numb. I'd spent enough human
3:17:23winters in the forest to to the dangers
3:17:25of exposure, the threat of cold and wet.
3:17:29Lucien, a step behind me, panted hard as
3:17:32the walls of rock and snow parted to
3:17:34reveal a bitter, star-flecked night and
3:17:37more mountains beyond. I almost
3:17:39whimpered.
3:17:41"We've got to keep going," he said, snow
3:17:44crusting the stray strands of his hair,
3:17:46and I wondered if the sound had indeed
3:17:48left me.
3:17:49Ice tickled my frozen nostrils. "We
3:17:51can't last long. We need to get warm and
3:17:54rest." "My brothers, we will die if we
3:17:57continue. Or lose fingers and toes at
3:18:00the best." I pointed to the mountain
3:18:02slope ahead, a hazardous plunge down.
3:18:05"We can't risk that at night. We need to
3:18:07find a cave and try to make a fire."
3:18:10"With what?" he snapped. "Do you see any
3:18:13wood?"
3:18:14I only continued on. Arguing just wasted
3:18:17energy and time, and I didn't have an
3:18:20answer anyway. I wondered if we'd make
3:18:22it through the night.
3:18:26We found a cave, deep and shielded from
3:18:29wind or sight. Lucien and I carefully
3:18:31covered our tracks, making sure the wind
3:18:33blew in our favor, veiling our scents.
3:18:36That was where our luck ran out. No wood
3:18:39to be found, no fire in either of our
3:18:41veins. So, we used our only option, body
3:18:45heat.
3:18:46Huddled in the farthest reaches of the
3:18:48cave, we sat thigh-to-thigh and
3:18:50arm-to-arm beneath my cloak, shuddering
3:18:52with cold and dripping wet.
3:18:55I could scarcely hear the hollow scream
3:18:56of the wind over my chattering teeth and
3:18:59his. "Find me. Find me. Find me." I
3:19:03tried shouting down that bond, but my
3:19:06mate's wry voice didn't answer. There
3:19:08was only the roaring void.
3:19:11"Tell me about her.
3:19:13About Elaine," Lucien said quietly, as
3:19:16if the death that squatted in the dark
3:19:18beside us had drawn his thoughts to his
3:19:20own mate as well.
3:19:22I debated not saying anything, shaking
3:19:24too hard to dredge up speech, but
3:19:27she loves her garden, always loved
3:19:29growing things. Even when we were
3:19:31destitute, she managed to tend a little
3:19:34garden in the warmer months. And when
3:19:37when our fortune returned, she took to
3:19:39tending and planting the most beautiful
3:19:41gardens you've ever seen, even in
3:19:44Prythian.
3:19:45It drove the servants mad because they
3:19:47were supposed to do the work, and ladies
3:19:49were only meant to clip a rose here and
3:19:51there.
3:19:52But Elain would put on a hat and gloves
3:19:54and kneel in the dirt, weeding.
3:19:56She acted like a purebred lady in every
3:19:59regard but that.
3:20:01Lucien was silent for a long moment.
3:20:04"Acted," he murmured.
3:20:06"You talk about her as if she's dead."
3:20:09I don't know what changes the Cauldron
3:20:11wrought on her.
3:20:13I don't think going home is an option,
3:20:15no matter how she might yearn to.
3:20:17Surely Prythian is a better alternative,
3:20:20war or no.
3:20:22I steeled myself before saying,
3:20:24"She is engaged, Lucien."
3:20:27I felt every inch of him go stiff beside
3:20:29me.
3:20:31"To whom?"
3:20:32Flat, cold words with the threat of
3:20:35violence simmering beneath.
3:20:37"To a human lord's son."
3:20:39"The lord hates faeries, has dedicated
3:20:41his life and wealth to hunting them,
3:20:44us."
3:20:45I was told that though it's a love
3:20:46match, her betrothed's father was keen
3:20:48to have access to her considerable dowry
3:20:51to continue his crusade against faerie
3:20:53kind.
3:20:55"Elain loves this lord's son?"
3:20:57Not quite a question.
3:20:59"She says she does."
3:21:01"Nesta
3:21:02Nesta thought the father and his
3:21:04obsession with killing faeries was bad
3:21:06enough to raise some alarms. She never
3:21:08voiced the concern to Elain.
3:21:10Neither did I."
3:21:12"My mate is engaged to a human male."
3:21:16He spoke more to himself than to me.
3:21:19I'm sorry if I want to see her just
3:21:22once, just
3:21:25to know.
3:21:26To know what?
3:21:28He hitched my damp cloak higher around
3:21:30us.
3:21:31If she is worth fighting for.
3:21:33I couldn't bring myself to say she was,
3:21:36to give him that sort of hope when
3:21:37Elaine might very well do everything in
3:21:39her power to hold to her engagement,
3:21:41even if immortality had already rendered
3:21:43it impossible.
3:21:46Lucien leaned his head back against the
3:21:47rock wall behind us.
3:21:49And then I'll ask your mate how he
3:21:51survived it, knowing you were engaged to
3:21:54someone else, sharing another male's
3:21:56bed.
3:21:58I tucked my freezing hands under my
3:21:59arms, gazing toward the gloom ahead.
3:22:03Tell me when you knew, he demanded, his
3:22:06knee pressing into mine, that Rhysand
3:22:08was your mate.
3:22:10Tell me when you stopped loving Tamlin
3:22:12and started loving him instead.
3:22:15I chose not to answer.
3:22:17Was it going on before you even left?
3:22:20I whipped my head to him, even if I
3:22:22could barely make out his features in
3:22:24the dark.
3:22:25I never touched Rhysand like that until
3:22:27months later.
3:22:29You kissed under the mountain. I had as
3:22:31little choice in that as I did in the
3:22:33dancing.
3:22:34And yet this is the male you now love.
3:22:37He didn't know. He had no inkling of the
3:22:39personal history, the secrets that had
3:22:42opened my heart to the High Lord of the
3:22:44Night Court.
3:22:45They were not my stories to tell.
3:22:48One would think, Lucien, that you'd be
3:22:50glad I fell in love with my mate, given
3:22:52that you're in the same situation Rhys
3:22:54was in six months ago.
3:22:56You left us.
3:22:58Us, not Tamlin.
3:23:00Us.
3:23:01The words echoed into the dark, toward
3:23:03the howling wind and lashing snow beyond
3:23:06the bend.
3:23:07I told you that day in the woods. You
3:23:09abandoned me long before I ever
3:23:11physically left.
3:23:13I shivered again, hating every point of
3:23:15contact that I so desperately needed his
3:23:18warmth.
3:23:19You fit into the Spring Court as little
3:23:21as I did, Lucien. You enjoyed its
3:23:23pleasures and diversions, but don't
3:23:25pretend you weren't made for something
3:23:26more than that.
3:23:28His metal eye whirred. And where exactly
3:23:31do you believe I will fit in? The Night
3:23:33Court?
3:23:35I didn't answer.
3:23:36I didn't have one, honestly.
3:23:39As High Lady, I could likely offer him a
3:23:41position if we survived long enough to
3:23:43make it home.
3:23:45I'd do it mostly to keep Elain from ever
3:23:47going to the Spring Court.
3:23:49But I had little doubt Lucien would be
3:23:50able to hold his own against my friends.
3:23:53And some small, horrible part of me
3:23:55enjoyed the thought of taking one more
3:23:57thing away from Tamlin. Something vital.
3:24:00Something essential.
3:24:02"We should leave at dawn." was my only
3:24:04reply.
3:24:08We lasted the night. Every part of me
3:24:10was stiff and aching when we began our
3:24:12careful trek down the mountain. Not a
3:24:14whisper or trace of Lucien's brothers or
3:24:17any sort of life.
3:24:19I didn't care. Not when we at last
3:24:21passed over the border and into Winter
3:24:23Court lands.
3:24:24Beyond the mountain, a great ice plain
3:24:27sparkled into the distance. It would
3:24:29take days to cross, but it didn't
3:24:31matter. I'd awoken with enough power in
3:24:33my veins to warm us with a small fire.
3:24:36Slowly, so slowly the effects of the
3:24:39faebane ebbed.
3:24:41I was willing to wager that we'd be
3:24:43halfway across the ice by the time we
3:24:44could winnow out of here. If our luck
3:24:47held and no one else found us.
3:24:49I ran through every lesson Rhys had
3:24:51taught me about the Winter Court and its
3:24:53High Lord, Kallias. Towering, exquisite
3:24:56palaces full of roaring hearths and
3:24:59bedecked in evergreens. Carved sleighs
3:25:01were the court's preferred method of
3:25:03transportation, hauled by velvet
3:25:05antlered reindeer whose splayed hooves
3:25:07were ideal for the ice and snow.
3:25:09Their forces were well trained, but they
3:25:12often relied on the great white bears
3:25:14that stalked the realms for any unwanted
3:25:16visitors.
3:25:17I prayed none of them waited on the ice.
3:25:19Their coats perfectly blended into the
3:25:21terrain.
3:25:23The Night Court's relationship with
3:25:24Winter was fine enough, still tenuous as
3:25:27all our bonds were after Amarantha,
3:25:30after she'd butchered so many of them,
3:25:32including, I remembered with no small
3:25:34surge of nausea, dozens of Winter Court
3:25:37children.
3:25:38I couldn't imagine it. The loss, the
3:25:41rage and grief.
3:25:43I'd never had the nerve to ask Rhys in
3:25:45those months of training who the
3:25:46children had belonged to, what the
3:25:48consequences had been,
3:25:50if it was considered the worst of
3:25:52Amarantha's crimes or just one of
3:25:54countless others.
3:25:56But despite any tentative bonds, Winter
3:25:58was one of the seasonal courts. It might
3:26:01side with Tamlin, with Tarquin.
3:26:04Our best allies remained the solar
3:26:06courts, Dawn and Day, but they lay far
3:26:09to the north, above the demarcation line
3:26:11between the solar and seasonal courts,
3:26:13that slice of sacred unclaimed land that
3:26:16held under the mountain and the Weaver's
3:26:18cottage.
3:26:20We'd be gone before we ever had to set
3:26:21foot in that lethal ancient forest.
3:26:25It was another day and night before we
3:26:27cleared the mountains entirely and set
3:26:29foot on the thick ice.
3:26:30Nothing grew, and I could only tell when
3:26:33we were on solid land by the dense snow
3:26:35packed beneath. Otherwise, too
3:26:37frequently, the ice was clear as glass,
3:26:40revealing dark depthless lakes beneath.
3:26:43At least we didn't encounter any of the
3:26:45white bears, but the real threat, we
3:26:47both quickly realized, was the utter
3:26:49lack of shelter.
3:26:51Out on the ice, there was none to be
3:26:53found against the wind and cold. And if
3:26:55we lit a fire with our feeble magic,
3:26:58anyone nearby would spot it, no matter
3:27:00the practicality of lighting a fire atop
3:27:02a frozen lake.
3:27:05The sun was just slipping above the
3:27:06horizon, staining the plane with gold,
3:27:09the shadows still a bruised blue, when
3:27:11Lucian said,
3:27:13"Tonight, we'll melt some of the ice
3:27:15pack enough to soften it and build a
3:27:18shelter."
3:27:19I considered. We were barely a hundred
3:27:21feet onto what seemed to be an endless
3:27:23lake. It was impossible to tell where it
3:27:26ended.
3:27:27"You think we'll be out on the ice for
3:27:28that long?"
3:27:30Lucian frowned toward the dawn-stained
3:27:32horizon. "Likely, but who knows how far
3:27:35it extends." Indeed, the snowdrifts hid
3:27:38much of the ice beneath. "Perhaps
3:27:40there's some other way around." I mused,
3:27:43glancing back toward our abandoned
3:27:44little camp. We looked at the same time
3:27:48and both beheld the three figures now
3:27:50standing at the lake edge, smiling.
3:27:53Ares lifted a hand wreathed in flame.
3:27:56Flame to melt the ice on which we stood.
3:28:03Chapter 13
3:28:05"Run." Lucian breathed. I didn't dare
3:28:08take my eyes off his brothers, not as
3:28:11Ares lowered that hand to the frozen
3:28:13edge of the lake. "Run where exactly?"
3:28:16Flesh met ice and steam rippled. The ice
3:28:19went opaque, thawing in a line that shot
3:28:21for us. We ran. The slick ice made for a
3:28:25treacherous sprint, my ankles roaring
3:28:27with the effort of keeping me upright.
3:28:29Ahead, the lake stretched on forever,
3:28:32and with the sun barely awake, the
3:28:34dangers would be even harder to spot.
3:28:36"Faster." Lucian ordered. "Don't look."
3:28:39he barked as I began to turn my head to
3:28:41see if they'd followed. He lashed out a
3:28:44hand to grip my elbow, steadying me
3:28:46before I could even register that I'd
3:28:48stumbled. Where would we go? Where would
3:28:50we go? Where would we go? Water splashed
3:28:53beneath my boots, thawed ice. Ares had
3:28:56to either be expending all his power to
3:28:58get through millennia of ice or was just
3:29:01doing it slowly to torture us.
3:29:03"Zag!" Lucien panted. "We need to" He
3:29:06shoved me aside and I staggered, arms
3:29:09wheeling, just as an arrow ricocheted
3:29:11off the ice where I'd been standing.
3:29:14"Faster!" Lucien snapped and I didn't
3:29:16hesitate. I hurtled into a flat-out
3:29:19sprint, Lucien and I weaving in and out
3:29:21of each other's paths as those arrows
3:29:23continued firing. Ice sprayed where they
3:29:26landed and no matter how fast we ran,
3:29:28the ground beneath us melted and melted.
3:29:32Ice.
3:29:33I had ice in my veins and now that we
3:29:35were over the border of the Winter
3:29:36Court,
3:29:38I didn't care if they saw it, my power,
3:29:40Kallias's power, not when the
3:29:42alternatives were far worse. I threw out
3:29:45a hand before us as a melting splotch
3:29:47began to spread, ice groaning. A spray
3:29:51of ice shot from my palm, freezing the
3:29:53lake once more. With each pump of my
3:29:55arms as I ran, I fired that ice from my
3:29:58palms, solidifying what Eris sought to
3:30:00melt ahead of us. Maybe, just maybe we
3:30:03could clear the lake and if they were
3:30:05stupid enough to be atop it when we did,
3:30:07if I could form ice, I could certainly
3:30:10unform it. I crossed paths with Lucien
3:30:12again, meeting his wide eyes as we did
3:30:15and opened my mouth to tell him my plan
3:30:18when Eris appeared, not behind, ahead.
3:30:22But it was the other brother at his
3:30:23side, arrow aimed and already flying for
3:30:26me, who drew the shout from my throat. I
3:30:28lunged to the side, rolling, not fast
3:30:31enough. The arrow's edge sliced the
3:30:34shell of my ear, my cheek, leaving a
3:30:36stinging wake. Lucien shouted, but
3:30:39another arrow was flying. It went clean
3:30:41through my right forearm this time. Ice
3:30:44sliced into my face, my hands as I went
3:30:47down, knees barking, arms shrieking in
3:30:49agony at the impact. Behind, steps
3:30:53thudded on ice as the third brother
3:30:54closed in.
3:30:56I bit my lip hard enough to draw blood
3:30:58as I ripped away the cloth of my jacket
3:31:00and shirt from my forearm, snapped the
3:31:02arrow in two, and tore the pieces from
3:31:05my flesh. My roar shattered and bounced
3:31:07across the ice.
3:31:09Eris had taken one step toward me,
3:31:11smiling like a wolf. When I was up
3:31:13again, my last two Illyrian knives in my
3:31:16palms, my right arm screaming at the
3:31:18movement, around me, the ice began to
3:31:22melt. "This can end with you going
3:31:24under, begging me to get you out once
3:31:26that ice instantly refreezes." Eris
3:31:29drawled. Behind him, cut off by his
3:31:32brothers, Lucien had drawn his own knife
3:31:34and now sized up the other two. "Or this
3:31:37can end with you agreeing to take my
3:31:38hand. But either way, you will be coming
3:31:42with me."
3:31:43Already, the flesh in my arm was
3:31:45knitting together, healing from Dawn's
3:31:48powers reawakening in my veins. And if
3:31:50that was working, I didn't give Eris
3:31:53time to read my move. I sucked in a
3:31:55sharp breath. White blinding light
3:31:58erupted from me. Eris swore, and I ran.
3:32:01Not toward him, not when I was still too
3:32:03injured to wield my knives, but away,
3:32:06toward that distant shore. Half blinded
3:32:08myself, I stumbled and staggered until I
3:32:11was clear of the treacherous melting
3:32:13splotches, then sprinted. I made it all
3:32:15of 20 ft before Eris winnowed in front
3:32:18of me and struck. A backhanded blow to
3:32:21the face so hard my teeth went through
3:32:23my lip. He struck again before I could
3:32:25even fall, a punch to my gut that ripped
3:32:28the air from my lungs. Beyond me, Lucien
3:32:31had unleashed himself upon his two
3:32:33brothers. Metal and fire blasted and
3:32:35collided, ice spraying.
3:32:38I'd no sooner hit the ice than Eris
3:32:40grabbed me by the hair, right at the
3:32:42roots. The grip so brutal tears stung my
3:32:44eyes, but he dragged me back toward that
3:32:47shore, back across the ice.
3:32:50I fought against the blow to my gut,
3:32:52fought to get a wisp of air down my
3:32:54throat, into my lungs. My boots scraped
3:32:57against the ice as I feebly kicked, yet
3:32:59Eris held firm. I think Lucien shouted
3:33:02my name.
3:33:04I opened my mouth, but a gag of fire
3:33:06shoved its way between my lips. It
3:33:08didn't burn, but was hot enough to tell
3:33:10me it would if Eris willed it. Equal
3:33:13bands of flame wrapped around my wrists,
3:33:15my ankles, my throat.
3:33:18I couldn't remember, couldn't remember
3:33:20what to do, how to move, how to stop
3:33:23this. Closer and closer to the shore, to
3:33:26the awaiting party of centuries that
3:33:27winnowed in out of nowhere. No. No. No.
3:33:32A shadow slammed into the earth before
3:33:34us, cracking the ice toward every
3:33:36horizon.
3:33:37Not a shadow, an Illyrian warrior.
3:33:40Seven red siphons glinted over his
3:33:42scaled black armor as Cassian tucked in
3:33:45his wings and snarled at Eris with five
3:33:48centuries worth of rage. Not dead, not
3:33:51hurt, whole. His wings repaired and
3:33:54strong. I loosed a shuddering sob over
3:33:57the burning gag. Cassian's siphons
3:33:59flickered in response as if the sight of
3:34:01me at Eris's hand Another impact struck
3:34:05the ice behind us. Shadows skirted in
3:34:07its wake. Azriel.
3:34:10I began crying in earnest, some leash
3:34:12I'd kept on myself snapping free as my
3:34:14friend landed. As I saw that Azriel,
3:34:17too, was alive, was healed. As Cassian
3:34:20drew twin Illyrian blades, the sight of
3:34:22them like home, and said to Eris with
3:34:25lethal calm,
3:34:26"I suggest you drop, my lady."
3:34:29Eris's grip on my hair only tightened,
3:34:32wringing a whimper from me. The wrath
3:34:34that twisted Cassian's face was
3:34:36world-ending, but his hazel eyes slid to
3:34:38mine, a silent command.
3:34:41He had spent months training me, not
3:34:43just to attack, but to defend, had
3:34:46taught me over and over how to get free
3:34:48of a captor's grasp, how to manage not
3:34:50only my body, but my mind. As if he'd
3:34:53known that it was a very real
3:34:55possibility that this scenario would one
3:34:57day happen.
3:34:59Eris had bound my limbs, but I could
3:35:01still move them, still use parts of my
3:35:03magic. And getting him off balance long
3:35:06enough to let go, to let Cassian jump
3:35:08between us and take on on the High
3:35:10Lord's son.
3:35:12Towering over me, Eris didn't so much as
3:35:14glance down as I twisted, spinning on
3:35:17the ice, and slammed my bound legs up
3:35:19between his.
3:35:21He lurched, bending over with a grunt,
3:35:24right into the fisted bound hands I
3:35:25drove into his nose. Bone crunched, and
3:35:28his hand sprang free of my hair. I
3:35:31rolled, scrambling away. Cassian was
3:35:34already there.
3:35:35Eris hardly had time to draw his sword
3:35:37as Cassian brought his own down upon
3:35:39him. Steel against steel rang out across
3:35:42the ice. Sentries on the shore unleashed
3:35:45arrows of wood and magic, only to bounce
3:35:47against a shield of blue. Azriel.
3:35:51Across the ice, he and Lucien were
3:35:53engaging the other two brothers. That
3:35:55any of Lucien's siblings held out
3:35:57against the Illyrians was a testament to
3:35:59their own training, but
3:36:01I focused the ice in my veins on the gag
3:36:04in my mouth, the binds around my wrists
3:36:06and ankles. Ice to smother fire, to sing
3:36:09it to sleep. Cassian and Eris clashed,
3:36:12danced back, clashed again. Ropes of
3:36:15fire snapped free, dissolving with a
3:36:17hiss of steam. I was on my feet again,
3:36:20reaching for a weapon I did not have. My
3:36:23daggers had been lost 40 ft away.
3:36:26Cassian got past Eris's guard with
3:36:28brutal efficiency, and Eris screamed as
3:36:31the Illyrian blade punched through his
3:36:32gut. Blood, red as rubies, stained the
3:36:36ice and snow.
3:36:37For a heartbeat, I saw how it would play
3:36:40out. Three of Beron's sons dead at our
3:36:42hands. A temporary satisfaction for me.
3:36:46Five centuries of satisfaction for
3:36:48Cassian, Azriel, and more.
3:36:50But if Beron still debated what side to
3:36:52support in this war,
3:36:54I had other weapons to use.
3:36:56"Stop." I said.
3:36:58The word was a soft, cold command, and
3:37:01Azriel and Cassian obeyed.
3:37:03Lucien's other two brothers were
3:37:05back-to-back, bloody and gaping. Lucien
3:37:08himself was panting, sword still raised,
3:37:11as Azriel flicked the blood off his own
3:37:12blade and stalked toward me. I met the
3:37:15hazel eyes of the Shadow Singer, that
3:37:17cool face that hid such pain and
3:37:20kindness.
3:37:21He had come. Cassian had come.
3:37:24The Illyrians fell into place beside me.
3:37:27Eris, a hand pressed to his gut, was
3:37:29breathing wetly, glaring at us. Glaring,
3:37:33then considering. Watching the three of
3:37:35us as I said to Eris, to his other two
3:37:37brothers, to the sentries on the shore,
3:37:40"You all deserve to die for this, and
3:37:43for much, much more.
3:37:45But I am going to spare your miserable
3:37:47lives." Even with a wound through his
3:37:49gut, Eris's lip curled. Cassian snarled
3:37:52his warning.
3:37:54I only removed the glamour I'd kept on
3:37:56myself these weeks. With the sleeve of
3:37:58my jacket and shirt gone, there was
3:38:00nothing but smooth skin where that wound
3:38:02had been. Smooth skin that now became a
3:38:05adorned with swirls and whorls of ink,
3:38:07the markings of my new title and my
3:38:10mating bond.
3:38:11Lucien's face drained of color as he
3:38:13strode for us, stopping a healthy
3:38:15distance from Azriel's side.
3:38:18"I am High Lady of the Night Court." I
3:38:21said quietly to them all.
3:38:23Even Eris stopped sneering. His amber
3:38:25eyes widened, something like fear now
3:38:28creeping into them. "There's no such
3:38:30thing as a High Lady." one of Lucien's
3:38:32brothers spat. A faint smile played on
3:38:35my mouth. There is now.
3:38:38And it was time for the world to know
3:38:40it. I caught Cassian's gaze, finding
3:38:42pride glimmering there, and relief.
3:38:46"Take me home," I ordered him, my chin
3:38:48high and unwavering. Then to Azriel,
3:38:51"Take us both home." I said to the
3:38:54Autumn Court scions,
3:38:56"We'll see you on the battlefield.
3:38:59Let them decide whether it was better to
3:39:00be fighting beside us or against us."
3:39:04I turned to Cassian, who opened his arms
3:39:06and tucked me in tight before launching
3:39:08us skyward in a blast of wings and
3:39:10power. Beside us, Azriel and Lucien did
3:39:13the same.
3:39:15When Eris and the others were nothing
3:39:16but specs of black on white below, when
3:39:19we were sailing high and fast, Cassian
3:39:21observed, "I don't know who looks more
3:39:24uncomfortable, Az or Lucien Vanth Sera."
3:39:28I chuckled, glancing over my shoulder to
3:39:30where the Shadow Singer carried my
3:39:32friend, both of them making a point not
3:39:34to speak, look, or talk. "Vanth Sera?
3:39:38You never knew his family name?"
3:39:40I met those laughing, fierce, hazel
3:39:42eyes.
3:39:43Cassian's smile softened.
3:39:46"Hello, Feyre."
3:39:47My throat tightened to the point of
3:39:49pain, and I threw my arms around his
3:39:51neck, embracing him tightly. "I missed
3:39:54you, too," Cassian murmured, squeezing
3:39:57me.
3:40:00We flew until we reached the border of
3:40:02the sacred eighth territory, and when
3:40:04Cassian set us down in a snowy field
3:40:07before the ancient wood, I took one look
3:40:09at the blonde female in Illyrian
3:40:11leathers pacing between the knarled
3:40:12trees and launched into a sprint. Mor
3:40:16held me as tightly as I gripped her.
3:40:18"Where is he?" I asked, refusing to let
3:40:21go, to lift my head from her shoulder.
3:40:24"He It's a long story. Far away, but
3:40:27racing home right now.
3:40:30Mor pulled back enough to scan my face.
3:40:32Her mouth tightened at the lingering
3:40:34injuries, and she gently scraped away
3:40:36flecks of dried blood caked on my ear.
3:40:39He picked up on you, the bond, minutes
3:40:42ago. The three of us were closest. I
3:40:44went out in Cassian, but with Eris and
3:40:47the others there.
3:40:49Guilt dimmed her eyes. Relations with
3:40:51the Winter Court are strained. We
3:40:53thought if I was out here on the border,
3:40:55it might keep Kallias's forces from
3:40:57looking south. At least long enough to
3:40:59get you.
3:41:00And to avoid an interaction with Eris
3:41:02that Mor was perhaps not ready for.
3:41:05I shook my head at the shame still
3:41:07shadowing her usually bright features.
3:41:10I understand. I embraced her again.
3:41:13I understand.
3:41:15Mor's answering squeeze was
3:41:16rib-crushing.
3:41:18Azriel and Lucien landed, plumes of snow
3:41:21spraying in the former's wake. Mor and I
3:41:24released each other at last, my friend's
3:41:26face going grave as she sized up Lucien.
3:41:29Snow and blood and dirt coated him,
3:41:32coated us both. Cassian explained to
3:41:34Mor. He fought against Eris and the
3:41:37other two. Mor's throat bobbed, noting
3:41:40the blood staining Cassian's hands,
3:41:42realizing it wasn't his own, scenting
3:41:44it, no doubt, as she blurted, "Eris!
3:41:47Did you?" "He remains alive." Azriel
3:41:50answered, shadows curling around the
3:41:52clawed tips of his wings. "So stark
3:41:55against the snow beneath our boots. So
3:41:58do the others."
3:41:59Lucien was glancing between all of them,
3:42:02wary and quiet. What he knew of Mor's
3:42:04history with his eldest brother, I'd
3:42:07never asked, never wanted to.
3:42:10Mor tossed her massive golden waves over
3:42:12a shoulder. "Then let's go home."
3:42:15"Which one?" I asked carefully. Mor
3:42:18swept her attention over Lucien once
3:42:20more. I almost pitied Lucien for the
3:42:22weight in her gaze, the utter judgment,
3:42:25the stare of the Morrigan whose gift was
3:42:28pure truth. Whatever she beheld in
3:42:30Lucien was enough for her to say,
3:42:32"The townhouse.
3:42:34You have someone waiting there for you."
3:42:40Chapter 14
3:42:43I had not let myself imagine it, the
3:42:45moment I'd again stand in the
3:42:46wood-paneled foyer of the townhouse,
3:42:49when I'd hear the song of the gulls
3:42:50soaring high over Velaris, smell the
3:42:53brine of the Sidra River that wended
3:42:55through the heart of the city, feel the
3:42:57warmth of the sunshine streaming through
3:42:59the windows upon my back.
3:43:01Mor had winnowed us all and now stood
3:43:04behind me, panting softly, as we watched
3:43:07Lucien survey our surroundings.
3:43:09His metal eye whirred, while the other
3:43:12warily scanned the rooms flanking the
3:43:14foyer. The dining room and sitting room
3:43:16overlooking the little front yard and
3:43:18street, then the stairs to the second
3:43:21level, then the hallway beside it that
3:43:23led to the kitchen and courtyard garden,
3:43:25then finally to the shut front door, to
3:43:28the city waiting beyond.
3:43:31Cassian took up a place against the
3:43:32banister, crossing his arms with an
3:43:34arrogance I knew meant trouble.
3:43:37Azriel remained beside me, shadows
3:43:39wreathing his knuckles, as if battling
3:43:41High Lord's sons was how they usually
3:43:43spent their days.
3:43:45I wondered if Lucien knew that his first
3:43:47words here would either damn or save
3:43:49him.
3:43:50I wondered what my role in it would be.
3:43:53No, it was my call.
3:43:56High Lady, I outranked them, my friends.
3:44:00It was my call to make whether Lucien
3:44:02was allowed to keep his freedom.
3:44:04But their watchful silence was
3:44:05indication enough. Let him decide his
3:44:08own fate.
3:44:10At last, Lucien looked at me, at us. He
3:44:13said,
3:44:15"There are children laughing in the
3:44:16streets. I blinked. He said it with such
3:44:20quiet surprise as if he hadn't heard the
3:44:23sound in a long, long time. I opened my
3:44:26mouth to reply, but someone else spoke
3:44:28for me. That they do so at all after
3:44:31Hybern's attack is testament to how hard
3:44:34the people of Velaris have worked to
3:44:36rebuild.
3:44:38I whirled, finding Amren emerging from
3:44:40wherever she'd been sitting in the other
3:44:42room. The plush furniture hiding her
3:44:44small body.
3:44:46She appeared exactly as she had the last
3:44:48time I'd seen her, standing in this very
3:44:51foyer, warning us to be careful in
3:44:53Hybern.
3:44:54Her chin-length, jet-black hair gleamed
3:44:56in the sunlight. Her silver, unearthly
3:44:59eyes unusually bright as they met mine.
3:45:02The delicate female bowed her head, as
3:45:05much of a gesture of obedience as a
3:45:0715,000-year-old creature would make to a
3:45:09newly minted High Lady and friend.
3:45:13I see you brought home a new pet. She
3:45:15said, nose crinkling with distaste.
3:45:18Something like fear had entered Lucien's
3:45:20eye, as if he too beheld the monster
3:45:23that lurked beneath that beautiful face.
3:45:26Indeed, it seemed he had heard of her
3:45:27already. Before I could introduce him,
3:45:30Lucien bowed at the waist, deeply.
3:45:33Cassian let out an amused grunt, and I
3:45:35shot him a warning glare. Amren smiled
3:45:38slightly. Already trained, I see. Lucien
3:45:43slowly straightened, as if he were
3:45:45standing before the open maw of some
3:45:46great plains cat he did not wish to
3:45:48startle with sudden movements. Amren,
3:45:51this is Lucien Vanserra.
3:45:54Lucien stiffened. I don't use my family
3:45:57name. He clarified to Amren with another
3:46:00incline of his head. Lucien will do. I
3:46:03suspected he'd ceased using that name
3:46:05the moment his lover's heart had stopped
3:46:07beating. Amren was studying that metal
3:46:10eye. Clever work, she said, then
3:46:13surveyed me. "Looks like someone clogged
3:46:16you up, girl." The wound in my arm at
3:46:18least had healed, though a nasty red
3:46:20mark remained. I assumed my face wasn't
3:46:23much better. Before I could answer her,
3:46:26Lucien asked, "What is this place?"
3:46:29We all looked at him.
3:46:31"Home." I said.
3:46:33"This is my home."
3:46:36I could see the details now sinking in.
3:46:38The lack of darkness, the lack of
3:46:40screaming, the scent of the sea and
3:46:42citrus, not blood and decay, the
3:46:45laughter of children that indeed
3:46:46continued. The greatest secret in
3:46:49Prythian's history.
3:46:51"This is Velaris." I explained, "the
3:46:54city of starlight." His throat bobbed.
3:46:57"And you are High Lady of the Night
3:46:59Court."
3:47:00"Indeed she is." My blood stopped at the
3:47:03voice that drawled from behind me, at
3:47:05the scent that hit me, awoke me. My
3:47:08friends began smiling.
3:47:10I turned.
3:47:12Rhysand leaned against the archway into
3:47:14the sitting room, arms crossed, wings
3:47:16nowhere to be seen, dressed in his usual
3:47:19immaculate black jacket and pants.
3:47:22And as those violet eyes met mine, as
3:47:24that familiar half-smile faded,
3:47:27my face crumpled. A small broken noise
3:47:30cracked from me.
3:47:31Rhys was instantly moving, but my legs
3:47:33had already given out. The foyer carpet
3:47:36cushioned the impact as I sank to my
3:47:38knees.
3:47:39I covered my face with my hands while
3:47:41the past month crashed into me.
3:47:44Rhys knelt before me, knee to knee.
3:47:47Gently, he pulled my hands away from my
3:47:49face.
3:47:51Gently, he took my cheeks in his hands
3:47:53and brushed away my tears.
3:47:55I didn't care that we had an audience,
3:47:58as I lifted my head and beheld the joy
3:48:00and concern and love shining in those
3:48:02remarkable eyes.
3:48:04Neither did Rhys as he murmured, "My
3:48:07love." and kissed me.
3:48:09I'd no sooner slid my hands into his
3:48:11hair than he scooped me into his arms
3:48:13and stood in one smooth movement. I
3:48:16pulled my mouth from his, glancing
3:48:18toward a pallid Lucien, but Rhysand said
3:48:21to our companions without so much as
3:48:23looking at them,
3:48:24"Go find somewhere else to be for a
3:48:26while."
3:48:27He didn't wait to see if they obeyed.
3:48:30Rhys winnowed us up the stairs and
3:48:32launched into a steady swift walk down
3:48:34the hallway. I peered down at the foyer
3:48:36in time to spy Mor grabbing Lucien's arm
3:48:39and nodding to the others before they
3:48:41all vanished.
3:48:43"Do you want to go over what happened at
3:48:44the Spring Court?" I asked, voice raw as
3:48:48I studied my mate's face.
3:48:50No amusement, nothing but that predatory
3:48:53intensity focused on my every breath.
3:48:56"There are other things I'd rather do
3:48:58first." He carried me into our bedroom,
3:49:01once his room, now full of our
3:49:03belongings.
3:49:04It was exactly as I'd last seen it. The
3:49:07enormous bed that he now strode for, the
3:49:09two armoires, the desk by the window
3:49:11that overlooked the courtyard garden now
3:49:13bursting with purple and pink and blue
3:49:16amid the lush greens.
3:49:18I braced myself to be sprawled on the
3:49:20bed, but Rhys paused halfway across the
3:49:23room, the door snicking shut on a
3:49:25star-kissed wind.
3:49:27Slowly, he set me on the plush carpet,
3:49:30blatantly sliding me down his body as he
3:49:32did so, as if he was as powerless to
3:49:34resist touching me as reluctant to let
3:49:37go as I was with him.
3:49:39And every place where our bodies met,
3:49:42all of him so warm and solid and real,
3:49:45I savored it, my throat tight as I
3:49:47placed a hand on his sculpted chest, the
3:49:50thunderous heartbeat beneath his black
3:49:52jacket echoing into my palm.
3:49:54The only sign of whatever torrent
3:49:56coursed through him as he skimmed his
3:49:58hands up my arms in a lingering caress
3:50:01and gripped my shoulders.
3:50:03His thumbs stroked a gentle rhythm over
3:50:05my filthy clothes as he scanned my face.
3:50:09Beautiful.
3:50:10He was even more beautiful than I had
3:50:12remembered, dreamed of during those
3:50:14weeks at the Spring Court.
3:50:16For a long moment, we only breathed in
3:50:19each other's air. For a long moment, all
3:50:22I could do was take the scent of him
3:50:23deep into my lungs, letting it settle
3:50:26inside me.
3:50:27My fingers tightened on his jacket.
3:50:30Mate. My mate.
3:50:33As if he'd heard it down the bond, Rhys
3:50:35finally murmured.
3:50:37When the bond went dark, I thought.
3:50:40Fear, genuine terror shadowed his eyes,
3:50:43even as his thumbs continued stroking my
3:50:45shoulders, gentle and steady. By the
3:50:48time I got to the Spring Court, you'd
3:50:50vanished. Tamlin was raging through that
3:50:53forest hunting for you. But you hid your
3:50:55scent, and even I couldn't couldn't find
3:50:59you.
3:51:00The snag in his words was a knife to my
3:51:02gut.
3:51:03We went to the Autumn Court through one
3:51:05of the doors, I said, setting my other
3:51:07hand on his arm. The corded muscles
3:51:10beneath shifted at my touch.
3:51:12You couldn't find me because two Hybern
3:51:14commanders drugged my food and drink
3:51:16with faebane, enough to extinguish my
3:51:18powers.
3:51:19I
3:51:20I still don't have full use.
3:51:23Cold rage now flickered across that
3:51:25beautiful face as his thumbs halted on
3:51:28my shoulders.
3:51:29You killed them.
3:51:31Not entirely a question, but I nodded.
3:51:34Good.
3:51:35I swallowed. Has Hybern sacked the
3:51:37Spring Court? Not yet. Whatever you did,
3:51:41it worked. Tamlin's sentries abandoned
3:51:43him. Over half his people refused to
3:51:46appear for the tithe two days ago. Some
3:51:48are leaving for other courts. Some are
3:51:51murmuring of rebellion.
3:51:53It seems you made yourself quite
3:51:54beloved, holy, even.
3:51:57Amusement at last warmed his features.
3:52:00"They were rather upset when they
3:52:02believed he'd allowed Hybern to
3:52:03terrorize you into fleeing."
3:52:05I traced the faint silver whirl of
3:52:07embroidery on the breast of his jacket,
3:52:10and I could have sworn he shuddered
3:52:11beneath the touch.
3:52:13"I suppose they'll learn soon enough I'm
3:52:15well cared for."
3:52:17Rhys's hands tightened on my shoulders
3:52:19in agreement, as if he were about to
3:52:21show me just how well cared for I was,
3:52:24but I angled my head.
3:52:25"What about Ianthe and Jurian?"
3:52:29Rhysand's powerful chest heaved beneath
3:52:31my hand as he blew out a breath.
3:52:33"Reports are murky on both. Jurian, it
3:52:36seems, has returned to the hand that
3:52:38feeds him. Ianthe?" Rhys lifted his
3:52:41brows.
3:52:42"I assume her hand is courtesy of you
3:52:45and not the Commander's."
3:52:47"She fell," I said sweetly. "Must have
3:52:50been some fall," he mused, a dark smile
3:52:53dancing on those lips. As he drifted
3:52:55even closer, the heat of his body
3:52:58seeping into me, while his hands
3:53:00migrated from my shoulders to brush lazy
3:53:02lines down my back.
3:53:04I bit my lip, focusing on his words and
3:53:07not the urge to arch into the touch, to
3:53:09bury my face in his chest and do some
3:53:11exploring of my own. "She's currently
3:53:14convalescing after her ordeal,
3:53:16apparently. Won't leave her temple." It
3:53:18was my turn to murmur, "Good."
3:53:21Perhaps one of those pretty acolytes of
3:53:23hers would get sick of her sanctimonious
3:53:25[ __ ] and smother Ianthe in her
3:53:27sleep.
3:53:28I braced my hands on his hips, fully
3:53:31ready to slide beneath his jacket,
3:53:33needing to touch bare skin.
3:53:35But Rhys straightened, pulling back,
3:53:38still close enough that one of his hands
3:53:39remained on my waist, but the other
3:53:42he reached for my arm, gently examining
3:53:45the angry welt where my skin had been
3:53:47torn by an arrow.
3:53:48Darkness rumbled in the corner of the
3:53:50room.
3:53:52"Cassian let me into his mind just now
3:53:55to show me what happened on the ice.
3:53:57He stroked a thumb over the hurt, the
3:53:59touch feather-light.
3:54:01Eris was always a male of limited days.
3:54:04Now Lucien might find himself closer to
3:54:06inheriting his father's throne than he
3:54:08ever expected to be.
3:54:11My spine locked.
3:54:13Eris is precisely as horrible as you
3:54:15painted him to be.
3:54:17Rhys's thumb glided over my forearm
3:54:19again, leaving gooseflesh in its wake. A
3:54:22promise not of the retribution he was
3:54:24contemplating, but of what awaited us in
3:54:26this room, the bed a few feet away.
3:54:30Until he murmured,
3:54:32"You declared yourself High Lady."
3:54:34Was I not supposed to?
3:54:36He released my arm to brush his knuckles
3:54:38across my cheek.
3:54:40"I've wanted to roar it from the
3:54:41rooftops of Velaris from the moment the
3:54:43priestess anointed you.
3:54:45How typical of you to upend my grand
3:54:47plans."
3:54:49A smile tugged on my lips.
3:54:51It happened less than an hour ago. I'm
3:54:53sure you could go crow from the chimney
3:54:55right now and everyone would give you
3:54:57credit for breaking the news.
3:54:59His fingers threaded through my hair,
3:55:01tilting my face up. That wicked smile
3:55:04grew and my toes curled in their boots.
3:55:07"There's my darling Feyre."
3:55:09His head dipped, his gaze fixated on my
3:55:12mouth, hunger lighting those violet
3:55:14eyes.
3:55:15Where are my sisters?
3:55:17The thought clanged through me, jarring
3:55:19as a pealing bell.
3:55:21Rhys paused, hand slipping from my hair
3:55:23as his smile faded. "At the House of
3:55:26Wind." He straightened, swallowing as if
3:55:29it somehow checked him.
3:55:30"I can take you to them." Every word
3:55:34seemed to be an effort,
3:55:36but he would, I realized. He'd shove
3:55:38down his need for me and take me to them
3:55:40if that was what I wanted. My choice. It
3:55:43had always been my choice with him.
3:55:46I shook my head. I wouldn't see them,
3:55:48not yet. Not until I was steady enough
3:55:51to face them.
3:55:53They're well, though?
3:55:54His hesitation told me enough.
3:55:57They're safe.
3:55:59Not really an answer, but I wasn't going
3:56:01to fool myself into thinking my sisters
3:56:03would be thriving.
3:56:04I leaned my brow against his chest.
3:56:07Cassian and Azriel are healed, I
3:56:10murmured against his jacket, breathing
3:56:12in the scent of him over and over. As a
3:56:15tremor shuddered through me.
3:56:17You told me that, and yet I didn't
3:56:20it didn't sink in until now. Rhys ran a
3:56:23hand down my back, the other sliding to
3:56:25grip my hip.
3:56:27Azriel healed within a few days.
3:56:29Cassian's wings
3:56:31it was complex, but he's been training
3:56:33every day to regain his strength. The
3:56:36healer had to rebuild most of his wings,
3:56:38but he'll be fine.
3:56:40I swallowed down the tightness in my
3:56:42throat and wrapped my arms around his
3:56:44waist, pressing my face wholly against
3:56:47his chest. His hand tightened on my hip
3:56:49in answer, the other resting at my nape,
3:56:52holding me to him as I breathed.
3:56:54Mor said you were far away. That was why
3:56:57you weren't there.
3:56:59I'm sorry I wasn't. No, I said, lifting
3:57:02my head to scan his eyes, the guilt
3:57:04dampening them.
3:57:06I didn't mean it like that. I just
3:57:09I savored the feel of him beneath my
3:57:10palms.
3:57:12Where were you?
3:57:13Rhys stilled, and I braced myself as he
3:57:16said casually, "I couldn't very well let
3:57:18you do all the work to undermine our
3:57:20enemies, could I?"
3:57:22I didn't smile.
3:57:24Where were you?
3:57:27With Az only recently back on his feet,
3:57:30I took it upon myself to do some of his
3:57:31work.
3:57:33I clenched my jaw. Such as?
3:57:36He leaned down, nuzzling my throat.
3:57:38Don't you want to comfort your mate who
3:57:41has missed you terribly these weeks.
3:57:43I planted a hand on his face and pushed
3:57:45him back, scowling.
3:57:47"I want my mate to tell me where the
3:57:49hell he was. Then he can get his
3:57:51comfort." Rhys nipped at my fingers,
3:57:54teeth snapping playfully. "Cruel,
3:57:57beautiful female." I watched him beneath
3:58:00lowered brows. Rhys rolled his eyes,
3:58:02sighing.
3:58:04"I was on the continent, at the human
3:58:06queen's palace."
3:58:07I choked. "You were where?"
3:58:10"Technically, I was flying above it,
3:58:12but" "You went alone?" He gaped at me.
3:58:15"Despite what our mistakes in Hybern
3:58:17might have suggested, I am capable of"
3:58:20"You went to the human world, to our
3:58:22enemy's compound, alone?"
3:58:25"I'd rather it be me than any of the
3:58:27others."
3:58:29That had been his problem from the
3:58:30start. Always him, always sacrificing.
3:58:34"Why?" I demanded. "Why risk it?" "Is
3:58:38something happening?"
3:58:39Rhys peered toward the window, as if he
3:58:41could see all the way to the mortal
3:58:43lands. His mouth tightened. "It's the
3:58:46quiet on their side of the sea that
3:58:48bothers me. No whisper of armies
3:58:50gathered, no other human allies
3:58:52summoned. Since Hybern, we've heard
3:58:54nothing.
3:58:55So, I thought to see for myself why that
3:58:58is." He flicked my nose, tugging me
3:59:00closer again.
3:59:02"I just neared the edge of their
3:59:03territory when I felt the bond awaken
3:59:05again.
3:59:06I knew the others were closer, so I sent
3:59:09them."
3:59:10"You don't need to explain."
3:59:12Rhys rested his chin atop my head.
3:59:15"I wanted to be there, to get you, find
3:59:17you, bring you home." "You do certainly
3:59:20enjoy a dramatic entrance." He chuckled,
3:59:23his breath warming my hair as I listened
3:59:26to the sound rumble through his body. Of
3:59:28course he would have been working
3:59:29against Hybern while I was away. Had I
3:59:32expected them all to be sitting on their
3:59:34asses for over a month? And Rhys,
3:59:36constantly plotting, always a step
3:59:39ahead. He would have used this time to
3:59:41his advantage.
3:59:43I debated asking about it, but right
3:59:45now, breathing him in, feeling his
3:59:48warmth,
3:59:49let it wait. Reese pressed a kiss to my
3:59:51hair.
3:59:52You're home.
3:59:54A shuddering small sound came out of me
3:59:56as I nodded, squeezing him tighter.
3:59:59Home. Not just Velaris, but wherever he
4:00:02was, our family was.
4:00:05Ebony claws stroked along the barrier in
4:00:07my mind in affection and request.
4:00:11I lowered my shields for him just as his
4:00:13own dropped. His mind curled around mine
4:00:16as surely as his body now held me.
4:00:19"I missed you every moment," Reese said,
4:00:22leaning down to kiss the corner of my
4:00:24mouth.
4:00:25"Your smile." His lips grazed over the
4:00:27shell of my ear, and my back arched
4:00:30slightly.
4:00:31"Your laugh."
4:00:32He pressed a kiss to my neck, right
4:00:34beneath my ear, and I tilted my head to
4:00:37give him access, biting down the urge to
4:00:39beg him to take more, to take faster as
4:00:42he murmured, "Your scent." My eyes
4:00:45fluttered closed, and his hands coasted
4:00:47around my hips to cup my rear, squeezing
4:00:50as he bent to kiss the center of my
4:00:52throat.
4:00:53"The sounds you make when I'm inside
4:00:55you." His tongue flicked over the spot
4:00:57where he'd kissed, and one of those
4:00:59sounds indeed escaped me. Reese kissed
4:01:02the hollow of my collarbone, and my core
4:01:04went utterly molten.
4:01:06"My brave, bold, brilliant mate."
4:01:10He lifted his head, and it was an effort
4:01:12to open my eyes, to meet his stare as
4:01:15his hands roved in lazy lines down my
4:01:17back, over my rear, then up again.
4:01:20"I love you," he said, and if I hadn't
4:01:23already believed him, felt it in my very
4:01:26bones, the light in his face as he said
4:01:28the words. Tears burned my eyes again,
4:01:32slipping free before I could control
4:01:33myself.
4:01:35Rhys leaned in to lick them away, one
4:01:37after another, as he'd once done under
4:01:40the mountain.
4:01:42"You have a choice," he murmured against
4:01:44my cheekbone.
4:01:45"Either I lick every inch of you clean."
4:01:48His hand grazed the tip of my breast,
4:01:50circling lazily, as if we had days and
4:01:53days to do this. "Or you can get into
4:01:56the bath that should be ready by now."
4:01:59I pulled away, lifting a brow.
4:02:01"Are you suggesting that I smell?" Rhys
4:02:04smirked, and I could have sworn my core
4:02:06pounded in answer. "Never, but" his eyes
4:02:10darkened, the desire and amusement
4:02:12fading as he took in my clothes.
4:02:14"There is blood on you, yours and
4:02:17others. I thought I'd be a good mate and
4:02:19offer you a bath before I ravish you
4:02:21wholly."
4:02:23I huffed a laugh and brushed back his
4:02:25hair, savoring the silken sable strands
4:02:28between my fingers.
4:02:29"So considerate, though I can't believe
4:02:32you kicked everyone out of the house so
4:02:34you could take me to bed."
4:02:36"One of the many benefits to being High
4:02:38Lord."
4:02:39"What a terrible abuse of power."
4:02:41That half-smile danced on his mouth.
4:02:44"Well"
4:02:45"as much as I'd like to see you attempt
4:02:47to lick off a week's worth of dirt,
4:02:48sweat, and blood" his eyes gleamed with
4:02:51the challenge, and I laughed again.
4:02:54"Normal bath, please." He had the nerve
4:02:56to look vaguely disappointed. I poked
4:02:59him in the chest as I pushed away,
4:03:01aiming for the large bathing room
4:03:02attached to the bedroom. The massive
4:03:05porcelain tub was already filled with
4:03:06steaming water and
4:03:09"bubbles?" "Do you have a moral
4:03:11objection to them?"
4:03:13I grinned, unbuttoning my jacket. My
4:03:15fingers were near black with dirt and
4:03:17caked blood. I cringed.
4:03:20"I might need more than one bath to get
4:03:22clean." He snapped his fingers, and my
4:03:24skin was instantly pristine again. I
4:03:27blinked.
4:03:28If you can do that, then what's the
4:03:30point of the bath? He'd done it under
4:03:32the mountain for me a few times, that
4:03:34magical cleaning. I'd somehow never
4:03:36asked. He leaned against the doorway,
4:03:39watching me peel off my torn and stained
4:03:41jacket as if it were the most important
4:03:44task he'd ever been given.
4:03:46>> The essence of dirt remains.
4:03:48>> His voice roughened as he tracked each
4:03:50movement of my fingers while I unlaced
4:03:52my boots. Like a layer of oil.
4:03:56Indeed, my skin, while it looked clean,
4:03:58felt
4:03:59unwashed. I kicked off the boots,
4:04:02letting them land on my filthy jacket.
4:04:05So, it's more for aesthetic purposes.
4:04:07>> You're taking too long.
4:04:09>> He said, jerking his chin toward the
4:04:11bath.
4:04:12My breasts tightened at the slight growl
4:04:14lacing his words. He watched that, too.
4:04:17And I smiled to myself, arching my back
4:04:20a bit more than necessary as I removed
4:04:22my shirt and tossed it to the marble
4:04:24floor.
4:04:25Sunlight streamed in through the steam
4:04:27rising from the tub, casting the space
4:04:30between us in golden white.
4:04:32Reese made a low noise that sounded
4:04:34vaguely like a whimper as he took in my
4:04:36[clears throat] bare torso. As he took
4:04:38in my breasts, now heavy and aching,
4:04:41badly enough that I had to swallow my
4:04:42plea to forget this bath entirely.
4:04:46But I pretended not to notice as I
4:04:48unbuttoned my pants and let them fall to
4:04:50the floor along with my undergarments.
4:04:54Reese's eyes simmered. I smirked, daring
4:04:57a look at his own pants, at the evidence
4:04:59of what exactly this was doing to him,
4:05:02pressing against the black material with
4:05:04impressive demand. I simply crooned,
4:05:08"Too bad there isn't room in the tub for
4:05:10two."
4:05:11>> A design flaw, and one I shall remedy
4:05:13tomorrow.
4:05:14>> His voice was rough, quiet, and it slid
4:05:17invisible hands down my breasts, between
4:05:20my legs.
4:05:21Mother save me. I somehow managed to
4:05:23walk, to climb into the tub, somehow
4:05:26managed to remember how to bathe myself.
4:05:29Reese remained leaning against the
4:05:31doorway the entire time, silently
4:05:33watching with that unrelenting focus.
4:05:36I might have taken longer washing
4:05:38certain areas and might have made sure
4:05:40he saw it.
4:05:42He only gripped the threshold hard
4:05:43enough that the wood groaned beneath his
4:05:45hand.
4:05:47But Reese made no move to pounce, even
4:05:49when I towelled off and brushed out my
4:05:51tangled hair. As if the restraint, it
4:05:54was part of the game, too.
4:05:57My bare toes curled on the marble floor
4:05:59as I set down my brush on the sink
4:06:01vanity, every inch of my body aware of
4:06:04where he stood in the doorway, aware of
4:06:06his eyes upon me in the mirror's
4:06:08reflection.
4:06:10"All clean." I declared, my voice hoarse
4:06:13as I met his stare in the mirror. I
4:06:15could have sworn only darkness and stars
4:06:17swirled beyond his shoulders. A blink
4:06:20and they were gone, but the predatory
4:06:22hunger on his face.
4:06:24I turned, my fingers trembling slightly
4:06:27as I clutched my towel around me.
4:06:29Reese only extended a hand, his own
4:06:32fingers shaking. Even the towel was
4:06:34abrasive against my too sensitive skin
4:06:37as I laid my hand on his, his calluses
4:06:40scraping as they closed over my fingers.
4:06:42I wanted them scraping all over me.
4:06:45But he simply led me into the bedroom,
4:06:48step after step. The muscles of his
4:06:50broad back shifting beneath his jacket
4:06:53and lower, the sleek, powerful cut of
4:06:55thighs, his ass.
4:06:57I was going to devour him from head to
4:07:00toe. I was going to devour him.
4:07:03But Reese paused before the bed,
4:07:05releasing my hand and facing me from the
4:07:07safety of a step away. And it was the
4:07:09expression on his face as he traced a
4:07:12still tender spot on my cheekbone that
4:07:14checked the heat threatening to raise my
4:07:16senses.
4:07:17I swallowed, my hair dripping on the
4:07:19carpet.
4:07:21Is the bruise bad?
4:07:23It's nearly gone.
4:07:25Darkness flickered in the room once
4:07:26more.
4:07:28I scanned that perfect face, every line
4:07:30and angle, the fear and rage and love,
4:07:33the wisdom and cunning and strength.
4:07:36I let my towel drop to the carpet. Let
4:07:39him look me over as I put a hand on his
4:07:41chest, his heart raging beneath my palm.
4:07:45Ready for ravishing?
4:07:47My words didn't come out with the
4:07:49swagger I'd intended. Not when Reese's
4:07:51answering smile was a dark, cruel thing.
4:07:55I hardly know where to begin. So many
4:07:57possibilities.
4:07:59He lifted a finger and my breath came
4:08:01hard and fast as he idly circled one of
4:08:03my breasts, then the other, in
4:08:06ever-tightening rings. I could start
4:08:08here, he murmured. I clenched my thighs
4:08:11together. He noted the movement, that
4:08:14dark smile growing. And just before his
4:08:17finger reached the tip of my breast,
4:08:19just before he gave me what I was about
4:08:21to beg for, his finger slid upward to my
4:08:24chest, my neck, my chin, right to my
4:08:27mouth. He traced the shape of my lips, a
4:08:30whisper of touch.
4:08:32Or I could start here, he breathed,
4:08:35slipping the tip of his finger into my
4:08:37mouth.
4:08:38I couldn't help myself from closing my
4:08:40lips around him, from flicking my tongue
4:08:42against the pad of his finger.
4:08:44But Reese withdrew his finger with a
4:08:46soft groan, making a downward path along
4:08:50my neck, chest, straight over a nipple.
4:08:53He paused there, flicking it once, then
4:08:56smoothed his thumb over the small hurt.
4:08:59I was shaking now, barely able to keep
4:09:01standing as his finger continued past my
4:09:03breast.
4:09:05He drew patterns on my stomach, scanning
4:09:07my face as he purred. Or
4:09:10I couldn't think beyond that single
4:09:12finger, that one point of contact as it
4:09:15drifted lower and lower to where I
4:09:17wanted him.
4:09:18"Or?" I managed to breathe.
4:09:21His head dipped, hair sliding over his
4:09:23brow as he watched. We both watched. His
4:09:27broad finger ventured down.
4:09:29"Or I could start here." He said, the
4:09:32words guttural and raw.
4:09:34I didn't care, not as he dragged that
4:09:36finger down the center of me, not as he
4:09:39circled that spot, light and taunting.
4:09:42"Here would be nice." He observed, his
4:09:45breathing uneven.
4:09:47"Or maybe even here." He finished and
4:09:50plunged that finger inside me. I
4:09:52groaned, gripping his arm, nails digging
4:09:55into the muscles beneath, muscles that
4:09:57shifted as he pumped his finger once,
4:09:59twice, then slid it out and drawled,
4:10:02brows rising.
4:10:04"Well, where shall I begin, favorite,
4:10:06darling?"
4:10:08I could barely form words, thoughts, but
4:10:11I'd had enough of playing. So, I took
4:10:13that infernal hand of his, guiding it to
4:10:16my heart and placed it there, half over
4:10:18the curve of my breast.
4:10:20I met his hooded gaze as I spoke the
4:10:22words that I knew would be his undoing
4:10:24in this little game, the words that were
4:10:26rising up in me with every breath.
4:10:29"You're mine."
4:10:31It snapped the tether he'd kept on
4:10:32himself. His clothes vanished, all of
4:10:35them, and his mouth angled over my own.
4:10:38It wasn't a gentle kiss, wasn't soft or
4:10:41searching. It was acclaiming, wild and
4:10:44unchecked. It was an unleashing, and the
4:10:47taste of him, the heat of him, the
4:10:49demanding stroke of his tongue against
4:10:51my own. Home. I was home.
4:10:55My hands shot into his hair, pulling him
4:10:57closer as I answered each of his searing
4:11:00kisses with my own, unable to get
4:11:02enough, unable to touch and feel enough
4:11:05of him. Skin to skin, Reese nudged me
4:11:08toward the bed, his hands kneading my
4:11:10rear as I ran my own over the velvet
4:11:12softness of him, over every hard plane
4:11:15and ripple. His beautiful, mighty wings
4:11:18tore from his back, splaying wide before
4:11:20neatly tucking in.
4:11:22My thighs hit the bed behind us, and
4:11:24Reese paused, trembling, giving me time
4:11:27to reconsider, even now. My heart
4:11:30strained, but I pulled my mouth from
4:11:32his, held his gaze as I lowered myself
4:11:35onto the white sheets, and inched back.
4:11:38Further and further onto the bed until I
4:11:41was bare before him, until I took in the
4:11:43considerable, proud length of him, and
4:11:45my core tightened in answer.
4:11:48"Reese," I breathed, his name a plea on
4:11:50my tongue.
4:11:52His wings flared, chest heaving as stars
4:11:54sparked in his eyes, and it was the
4:11:56longing there, beneath the desire,
4:11:59beneath the need. It was the longing in
4:12:01those beautiful eyes that made me glance
4:12:03to the mountains tattooed on his knees,
4:12:06the insignia of this court, our court,
4:12:10the promise that he would kneel for no
4:12:11one and nothing but his crown, and me.
4:12:15Mine.
4:12:16He was mine. I sent the thought down the
4:12:19bond.
4:12:20No playing, no delaying. I wanted him on
4:12:23me, in me. I needed to feel him, hold
4:12:26him, share breath with him.
4:12:29He heard the edge of desperation, felt
4:12:31it through the mating bond flowing
4:12:32between us. His eyes did not leave mine
4:12:35as he prowled over me, every movement
4:12:38graceful as a stalking plains cat,
4:12:40interlacing our fingers, his breathing
4:12:43uneven. Reese used a knee to nudge my
4:12:45legs apart and settle between them.
4:12:48Carefully, lovingly, he laid our joined
4:12:51hands beside my head as he guided
4:12:53himself into me, and whispered in my
4:12:56ear, "You're mine, too."
4:12:59At the first nudge of him, I surged
4:13:01forward to claim his mouth. I dragged my
4:13:03tongue over his teeth, swallowing his
4:13:06groan of pleasure as his hips rolled in
4:13:08gentle thrusts, and he pushed in and in
4:13:11and in.
4:13:12Home. This was home. And when Reese was
4:13:16seated to the hilt, when he paused to
4:13:18let me adjust to the fullness of him, I
4:13:20thought I might explode into moonlight
4:13:22and flame, thought I might die from the
4:13:25sheer force of what swept through me.
4:13:27My pants were edged with sobs as I dug
4:13:30my fingers into his back, and Reese
4:13:32withdrew slightly to study my face, to
4:13:35read what was there.
4:13:37"Never again," he promised as he pulled
4:13:39out, then thrust back in with
4:13:41excruciating slowness. He kissed my
4:13:43brow, my temple. "My darling Farah."
4:13:47Beyond words, I moved my hips, urging
4:13:50him deeper, harder. Reese obliged me.
4:13:53With every movement, every shared
4:13:55breath, every whispered endearment and
4:13:58moan, that mating bond I hidden so far
4:14:00inside myself grew brighter, clearer.
4:14:04And when it again shown as brightly as
4:14:06adamant, my release cascaded through me,
4:14:08leaving my skin glowing like a newborn
4:14:11star in its wake.
4:14:13At the sight of it, right as I dragged a
4:14:14finger down the sensitive inside of his
4:14:17wing, Reese shouted my name and found
4:14:19his pleasure.
4:14:21I held him through every heaving breath,
4:14:23held him as he at last stilled,
4:14:25lingering inside me, and relished the
4:14:28feel of his skin on mine. For long
4:14:30minutes we remained there, tangled
4:14:32together, listening to our breathing
4:14:35even out, the sound of it finer than any
4:14:37music.
4:14:39After a while, Reese lifted his chest
4:14:41enough to take my right hand, to examine
4:14:43the tattoos inked there. He kissed one
4:14:46of the whorls of near-black blue ink.
4:14:49His throat bobbed.
4:14:51"I missed you.
4:14:52Every second, every breath.
4:14:55Not just this," he said, shifting his
4:14:57hips for emphasis and dragging a groan
4:15:00from deep in my throat, "but talking to
4:15:03you, laughing with you. I missed having
4:15:06you in my bed, but missed having you as
4:15:09my friend even more."
4:15:11My eyes burned. "I know," I managed to
4:15:14say, stroking a hand down his wings, his
4:15:17back. "I know." I kissed his bare
4:15:20shoulder right over a whirl of Illyrian
4:15:23tattoo.
4:15:24"Never again," I promised him, and
4:15:27whispered it over and over as the
4:15:29sunlight drifted across the floor.
4:15:35Chapter 15
4:15:38My sisters had been living in the House
4:15:40of Wind since they'd arrived in Velaris.
4:15:43They did not leave the palace built into
4:15:44the upper parts of a flat-topped
4:15:46mountain overlooking the city. They did
4:15:48not ask for anything or anyone, so I
4:15:52would go to them.
4:15:53Lucien was waiting in the sitting room
4:15:55when Rhysand I came downstairs at last,
4:15:58my mate having given the silent order
4:16:00for them to return. Unsurprisingly,
4:16:03Cassian and Azriel were casually seated
4:16:05in the dining room across the hall,
4:16:07eating lunch and marking every single
4:16:09breath Lucien emitted. Cassian smirked
4:16:13at me, brows flicking up.
4:16:15I shot him a warning glare that dared
4:16:17him to comment. Azriel, thankfully, just
4:16:20kicked Cassian under the table. Cassian
4:16:23gawked at Azriel as if to declare I
4:16:25wasn't going to say anything, while I
4:16:27approached the open archway into the
4:16:29sitting room, Lucien rising to his feet.
4:16:32I fought my cringe as I halted in the
4:16:34threshold. Lucien was still in his
4:16:36travel-worn, filthy clothes. His face
4:16:39and hands, at least, were clean, but I
4:16:42should have gotten him something else,
4:16:44remembered to offer him The thought
4:16:47rippled away into nothing as Rhys
4:16:49appeared at my side.
4:16:51Lucien did not bother to hide the slight
4:16:53curling of his lip, as if he could see
4:16:55the mating bond glowing between Rhys and
4:16:57me.
4:16:58His eyes, both russet and golden, slid
4:17:01down my body to my hand,
4:17:04to the ring now on my finger, at the
4:17:06star sapphire sky bright against the
4:17:08silver. A simple silver band sat on
4:17:11Rhysand's matching finger.
4:17:14We'd slid them onto each other's hands
4:17:15before coming downstairs, more intimate
4:17:18and searing than any publicly made vows.
4:17:21I'd told Rhys before we did so that I
4:17:23had half a mind to deposit his ring at
4:17:25the Weaver's cottage and make him
4:17:27retrieve it.
4:17:28He laughed and said that if I truly felt
4:17:30it was necessary to settle the score
4:17:32between us, perhaps I could find some
4:17:35other creature for him to battle, one
4:17:37that wouldn't delight in removing my
4:17:39favorite part from his body.
4:17:41I'd only kissed him, murmuring about
4:17:43someone thinking rather highly of
4:17:44themselves, and had placed the ring he'd
4:17:47selected for himself, bought here in
4:17:49Velaris while I'd been away, onto his
4:17:52finger.
4:17:53Any joy, any lingering laughter from
4:17:56that moment, those silent vows,
4:17:59it curled up like leaves in a fire as
4:18:01Lucien sneered at our rings, how close
4:18:03we stood. I swallowed. Rhys noted it,
4:18:07too. It was impossible to miss.
4:18:10My mate leaned against the carved
4:18:11archway and drawled to Lucien, "I assume
4:18:14Cassian or Azriel has explained that if
4:18:17you threaten anyone in this house, this
4:18:19territory, we'll show you ways to die
4:18:22you've never even imagined."
4:18:24"Indeed." The Illyrians smirked from
4:18:26where they lingered in the dining room
4:18:28threshold. Azriel was by far the more
4:18:30terrifying of the pair.
4:18:33Something twisted in my gut at the
4:18:34threat, the smooth, sleek aggression.
4:18:37Lucien was had been my friend. He wasn't
4:18:41my enemy, not entirely.
4:18:44"But," Rhys continued, sliding his hands
4:18:47into his pockets. I can understand how
4:18:49difficult this past month has been for
4:18:51you. I know Feyre explained we aren't
4:18:54exactly as rumor suggests.
4:18:56I'd let him into my mind before we'd
4:18:58come down, shown him all that had
4:19:00occurred at the Spring Court.
4:19:03But hearing it and seeing it are two
4:19:05different things. He shrugged with one
4:19:08shoulder.
4:19:09Elain has been cared for. Her
4:19:11participation in life here has been
4:19:12entirely her choice. No one but us and a
4:19:16few trusted servants have entered the
4:19:17House of Wind.
4:19:19Lucien remained silent. I was in love
4:19:22with Feyre, Rhys said quietly, long
4:19:25before she ever returned the feeling.
4:19:28Lucien crossed his arms.
4:19:30How fortunate that you got what you
4:19:32wanted in the end.
4:19:34I closed my eyes for a heartbeat.
4:19:36Cassian and Azriel stilled, waiting for
4:19:38the order. I will only say this once,
4:19:42warned the High Lord of the Night Court.
4:19:44Even Lucien flinched.
4:19:46I suspected Feyre was my mate before I
4:19:49ever knew she was involved with Tamlin.
4:19:51And when I learned of it,
4:19:53if it made her happy, I was willing to
4:19:55step back.
4:19:57You came to our house and stole her away
4:19:59on her wedding day.
4:20:01I was going to call the wedding off, I
4:20:03cut in, taking a step toward Lucien. You
4:20:06knew it.
4:20:07Rhysand went on before Lucien could snap
4:20:09a reply.
4:20:10I was willing to lose my mate to another
4:20:12male. I was willing to let them marry if
4:20:15it brought her joy. But what I was not
4:20:18willing to do was let her suffer, to let
4:20:20her fade away into a shadow. And the
4:20:22moment that piece of [ __ ] blew apart his
4:20:24study, the moment he locked her in that
4:20:27house, his wings ripped from him, and
4:20:30Lucien started. Rhys bared his teeth. My
4:20:33limbs turned light, trembling at the
4:20:35dark power curling in the corners of the
4:20:37room. Not fear, never fear of him, but
4:20:41at the shattered control as Rhys snarled
4:20:43at Lucien.
4:20:45"My mate may one day find it in herself
4:20:47to forgive him, forgive you, but I will
4:20:51never forget how it felt to sense her
4:20:52terror in those moments."
4:20:55My cheeks heated, especially as Cassian
4:20:58and Azriel stalked closer, those hazel
4:21:01eyes now filled with a mix of sympathy
4:21:03and wrath. I had never talked about it
4:21:05to them, what had gone on that day
4:21:07Tamlin had destroyed his study, where
4:21:09the day he'd sealed me inside the manor.
4:21:12I'd never asked Rhys if he'd informed
4:21:14them. From the fury rippling from
4:21:16Cassian, the cold rage seeping from
4:21:18Azriel, I didn't think so.
4:21:21Lucien, to his credit, didn't back away
4:21:23a step from Rhys or me or the Illyrians.
4:21:27The clever fox stares down winged death,
4:21:30the painting flashed into my mind.
4:21:33"So again, I will say this only once."
4:21:37Rhys went on, his expression smoothing
4:21:39into lethal calm, dragging me from the
4:21:42colors and light and shadows gathering
4:21:44in my mind. "Feyre did not dishonor or
4:21:46betray Tamlin. I revealed the mating
4:21:49bond months later, and she gave me hell
4:21:52for it, don't worry. But now that you've
4:21:54found your mate in a similar situation,
4:21:57perhaps you will try to understand how
4:21:58it felt. And if you can't be bothered,
4:22:01then I hope you're wise enough to keep
4:22:03your mouth shut. Because the next time
4:22:05you look at my mate with that disdain
4:22:07and disgust, I won't bother to explain
4:22:10it again, and I will rip out your
4:22:12[ __ ] throat." Rhys said it so mildly
4:22:15that the threat took a second to
4:22:16register, to settle in me like a stone
4:22:19plunked into a pool.
4:22:21Lucien only shifted on his feet, wary,
4:22:24considering.
4:22:25I counted the heartbeats, debating how
4:22:27much I'd interfere if he said something
4:22:29truly stupid, when at last he murmured,
4:22:33"There is a longer story to be told, it
4:22:35seems."
4:22:37Smart answer. The rage ebbed from Rhys's
4:22:40face, and Cassian's and Azriel's
4:22:42shoulders relaxed ever so slightly.
4:22:45"Just once," Lucien had said to me
4:22:47during those days on the run. That was
4:22:49all he wanted, to see Elain only once.
4:22:53And then
4:22:54I'd have to figure out what to do with
4:22:56him, unless my mate already had some
4:22:58plan in motion.
4:23:00One look at Rhys, who lifted his brows
4:23:02as if to say, "He's all yours," told me
4:23:05it was my call.
4:23:06"But until then," I cleared my throat,
4:23:10"I'm going to see my sisters up at the
4:23:12house," I said to Lucien, whose eyes
4:23:14snapped to mine, the metal one
4:23:16tightening and whirring. I forced a grim
4:23:18smile to my face.
4:23:20"Would you like to come?"
4:23:22Lucien weighed my offer, and the three
4:23:24males monitoring his every blink and
4:23:26breath.
4:23:27He only nodded, another wise decision.
4:23:31We were gone within minutes, the quick
4:23:33walk up to the roof of the townhouse
4:23:34serving as Lucien's tour of my home. I
4:23:37didn't bother to point out the bedrooms.
4:23:39Lucien certainly didn't ask.
4:23:42Azriel left us as we took to the skies,
4:23:44murmuring that he had some pressing
4:23:46business to attend to. From the glare
4:23:48Cassian gave him, I wondered if the
4:23:51Shadow Singer had invented it to avoid
4:23:53carrying Lucien to the House of Wind.
4:23:55But Rhys's subtle nod to Azriel told me
4:23:57enough.
4:23:59There were indeed matters afoot, plans
4:24:01in motion, as they always were. And once
4:24:04I finished visiting my sisters, I'd get
4:24:07answers of my own.
4:24:09So Cassian bore a stone-faced Lucien
4:24:11into the skies, and Rhys swept me into
4:24:14his arms, shooting us gracefully into
4:24:16the cloudless blue.
4:24:18With every wingbeat, with every deep
4:24:20inhale of the citrus and salt breeze,
4:24:23some tightness in my body uncoiled,
4:24:26even if every wingbeat brought us closer
4:24:28to the house looming above Velaris, to
4:24:31my sisters.
4:24:35The House of Wind had been carved into
4:24:37the red sun-warmed stone of the
4:24:38flat-topped mountains that lurked over
4:24:40one edge of the city, with countless
4:24:42balconies and patios jutting to overhang
4:24:45the thousand-foot drop to the valley
4:24:46floor.
4:24:47Valaris' winding streets flowed right to
4:24:50the sheer wall of the mountain itself,
4:24:52and snaking through it wove the Sidra, a
4:24:55glittering bright band in the midday
4:24:56sun.
4:24:58As we landed on the veranda that edged
4:25:00our usual dining room, Cassian and
4:25:02Lucien alighting behind us, I let it
4:25:05sink in. The city and the river and the
4:25:08distant sea, the jagged mountains on the
4:25:10other side of Valaris, and the blazing
4:25:13blue of the sky above, and the House of
4:25:15Wind, my other home, the grand formal
4:25:18sister to the townhouse, our public
4:25:21home, I supposed, where we would hold
4:25:23meetings and receive guests who weren't
4:25:25family.
4:25:27A far more pleasant alternative to my
4:25:29other residence, the Court of
4:25:30Nightmares.
4:25:32At least there I could stay in the
4:25:33Moonstone Palace high atop the mountain
4:25:36under which the human city had been
4:25:37built. Though the people I'd rule over,
4:25:41I shut them from my thoughts as I
4:25:42adjusted my braid, tucking in strands
4:25:45that had been whipped free by the gentle
4:25:47wind Rhys had allowed through his shield
4:25:49while flying.
4:25:50Lucien just walked to the balcony rail
4:25:53and stared out. I didn't quite blame
4:25:55him.
4:25:56I glanced over a shoulder to where Rhys
4:25:58and Cassian now stood. Rhys lifted a
4:26:00brow.
4:26:02Wait inside. Rhys' smile was sharp. So
4:26:05you won't have any witnesses when you
4:26:07push him over the railing?
4:26:09I gave him an incredulous look and
4:26:11strode for Lucien, Rhys' murmur to
4:26:13Cassian about getting a drink in the
4:26:15dining room, the only indication of
4:26:17their departure.
4:26:18That and the near silent opening and
4:26:21closing of the glass doors that led into
4:26:23the dining room beyond. The same room
4:26:25where I'd first met most of them, my new
4:26:28family. I came up beside Lucien, the
4:26:31wind ripping strands of his red hair
4:26:33free from where he'd tied it at his
4:26:35nape.
4:26:36"This isn't what I expected." He said,
4:26:39taking in the sprawl of Velaris.
4:26:42"The city is still rebuilding after the
4:26:43Hybern attack."
4:26:45His eyes dropped to the carved balcony
4:26:47rail.
4:26:49"Even though we had no part in that."
4:26:51"I'm sorry, but
4:26:53that's not what I meant." He glanced
4:26:55behind us to where Rhys and Cassian
4:26:58waited inside the dining room, drinks
4:27:00now in hand, leaning all too casually
4:27:02against the giant oak table in its
4:27:04center.
4:27:06They became immensely interested in some
4:27:07spot or stain on the surface between
4:27:09them. I scowled at them, but swallowed.
4:27:13And even though my sisters waited
4:27:14inside, even though the urge to see them
4:27:17was so tangible I wouldn't have been
4:27:18surprised to find a rope tugging me into
4:27:20the house, I said to Lucien,
4:27:24"Rhys saved my life on Callanmai."
4:27:27So I told him all of it. The story that
4:27:30perhaps would help him understand and
4:27:32realize how truly safe Amren was, he now
4:27:36was.
4:27:37I eventually summoned Rhys to explain
4:27:39his own history, and he gave Lucien the
4:27:41barest details, none of the vulnerable
4:27:44sorrowful bits that had reduced me to
4:27:46tears in that mountain cabin, but it
4:27:48painted a clear enough picture.
4:27:51Lucien said nothing while Rhys spoke, or
4:27:54when I continued with my tale, Cassian
4:27:56often chiming in with his own account of
4:27:58how it had been to live with two mated
4:28:00yet unmated people, to pretend Rhys
4:28:03wasn't courting me, to welcome me into
4:28:05their little circle.
4:28:07I didn't know how long had passed when
4:28:09we finished, though Rhys and Cassian
4:28:11used the time to unabashedly sun their
4:28:13wings by the open balcony ledge.
4:28:16I left off our story at Hybern, at the
4:28:19day I'd gone back to the Spring Court.
4:28:22Silence fell, and Rhys and Cassian again
4:28:25walked away, understanding the emotion
4:28:27swimming in Lucien's eye, the meaning of
4:28:30the long breath he blew out.
4:28:33When we were alone, Lucien rubbed his
4:28:35eyes.
4:28:36"I've seen Rhysand do such horrible
4:28:39things, seen him play the dark prince
4:28:42over and over.
4:28:43And yet you tell me it was all a lie, a
4:28:46mask, all to protect this place, these
4:28:49people. And I would have laughed you for
4:28:51believing it. And yet
4:28:54this city exists, untouched, or until
4:28:58recently, I suppose.
4:29:00Even the Dawn Court cities are nothing
4:29:02so lovely as this.
4:29:04Lucien,
4:29:05and you love him, and he
4:29:08he truly does love you."
4:29:10Lucien dragged a hand through his red
4:29:12hair. "And all these people I have spent
4:29:14my centuries hating, even fearing,
4:29:18they are your family."
4:29:20"I think Amren would probably deny that
4:29:22she feels any affection for us.
4:29:24Amren is a bedtime story they told us as
4:29:26younglings to make us behave. Amren was
4:29:30who would drink my blood and carry me to
4:29:32hell if I acted out of line.
4:29:34And yet there she was, acting more like
4:29:37a cranky old aunt than anything."
4:29:39"We don't
4:29:41we don't enforce protocol and rank here,
4:29:44obviously. Rhys lives in a townhouse by
4:29:47the Cauldron."
4:29:48He waved an arm to encompass the city.
4:29:51I didn't know what to say, so I kept
4:29:53silent.
4:29:55"I hadn't realized I was a villain in
4:29:57your narrative," Lucien breathed. "You
4:30:00weren't, not entirely."
4:30:02The sun danced on the distant sea,
4:30:04turning the horizon into a glittering
4:30:06sprawl of light.
4:30:09"She doesn't know anything about you,
4:30:11only the basics that Rhys gave her. You
4:30:13are a High Lord's son, serving in the
4:30:15Spring Court, and you helped me under
4:30:18the mountain. Nothing else.
4:30:21I didn't add that Rhys had told me my
4:30:22sister hadn't asked about him at all.
4:30:25I straightened.
4:30:27I would like to see them first. I know
4:30:29you're anxious.
4:30:30"Just do it." Lucien said, bracing his
4:30:33forearms on the stone rail of the
4:30:35veranda. "Come get me when she's ready."
4:30:38I almost patted his shoulder. Almost
4:30:41said something reassuring.
4:30:43But words failed me again as I headed
4:30:45for the dim interior of the house.
4:30:50Rhys had given Nesta and Elain a suite
4:30:52of connecting rooms, all with views
4:30:54overlooking the city and river and
4:30:56distant mountains beyond.
4:30:58But it was in the family library that
4:31:00Rhys tracked down Nesta.
4:31:02There was a coiled razor-sharp tension
4:31:04in Cassian as the three of us strode
4:31:07down the stairways of the house, the red
4:31:09stone halls dim and echoing with the
4:31:11rustle of Cassian's wings, and the faint
4:31:13howl of wind rattling at every window.
4:31:16A tension that grew more taut with every
4:31:18step toward the double doors of the
4:31:20library.
4:31:21I hadn't asked if they had seen each
4:31:23other or spoken since that day in
4:31:25Hybern. Cassian volunteered no
4:31:27information. And I might have asked Rhys
4:31:30down the bond had he not opened one of
4:31:32the doors. Had I not immediately spied
4:31:34Nesta curled in an armchair, a book on
4:31:37her knees, looking for once very
4:31:40un-Nesta-like.
4:31:42Casual. Perhaps relaxed.
4:31:45Perfectly content to be alone. The
4:31:47moment my shoes scuffed against the
4:31:49stone floor, she shot straight up, back
4:31:52going stiff, closing her book with a
4:31:54muffled thud. Yet her gray-blue eyes
4:31:56didn't so much as widen as they beheld
4:31:58me, as I took her in.
4:32:01Nesta had been beautiful as a human
4:32:03woman. As High Fae, she was devastating.
4:32:07From the utter stillness with which
4:32:09Cassian stood beside me, I wondered if
4:32:11he thought the same thing. She was in a
4:32:13pewter-colored gown. Its make simple,
4:32:16yet the material fine.
4:32:18Her hair was braided over the crown of
4:32:20her head, accentuating her long, pale
4:32:22neck. A neck Cassian's eyes darted to,
4:32:25then quickly away from, as she sized us
4:32:28up and said to me,
4:32:30"You're back."
4:32:31With her hair styled like that, it hid
4:32:33the pointed ears. But there was nothing
4:32:36to hide the ethereal grace as she took
4:32:38one step. As her focus again returned to
4:32:40Cassian, and she added, "What do you
4:32:43want?"
4:32:44I felt the blow like a punch to my gut.
4:32:47"At least immortality hasn't changed
4:32:49some things about you."
4:32:51Nesta's look was nothing short of icy.
4:32:53"Is there a purpose to this visit, or
4:32:56may I return to my book?"
4:32:58Rhys's hand brushed mine in silent
4:33:00comfort, but his face hard as stone and
4:33:03even less amused.
4:33:06But Cassian sauntered over to Nesta, a
4:33:08half smile spreading across his face.
4:33:11She stood stiffly while he picked up the
4:33:12book, read the title, and chuckled. "I
4:33:15wouldn't have pegged you for a romance
4:33:17reader."
4:33:18She gave him a withering glare.
4:33:20Cassian leafed through the pages and
4:33:22drawled to me,
4:33:23"You haven't missed much while you were
4:33:25off destroying our enemies, Feyre. It's
4:33:27mostly been this." Nesta whirled to me.
4:33:31"You accomplished it?"
4:33:33I clenched my jaw.
4:33:35"We'll see how it plays out. I made sure
4:33:38Hybern suffered." At the hint of rage
4:33:40and fear that crept into Nesta's eyes, I
4:33:43amended, "Not enough, though."
4:33:46I glanced at her hand, the one she'd
4:33:48pointed with at the King of Hybern.
4:33:50Rhys had mentioned no signs of special
4:33:52powers from either of my sisters.
4:33:54Yet that day in Hybern, when Nesta had
4:33:57opened her eyes,
4:33:59I had seen it. Seen something great and
4:34:01terrible within them.
4:34:03And again, "Why are you here?" She
4:34:07snatched book from Cassian, who allowed
4:34:09her to do so, but remained standing
4:34:11beside her, watching every breath, every
4:34:15blink.
4:34:16"I wanted to see you," I said quietly.
4:34:19"See how you were doing."
4:34:21"See if I've accepted my lot and found
4:34:24myself grateful for becoming one of
4:34:25them." I steeled my spine. "You're my
4:34:28sister. I watched them hurt you. I
4:34:31wanted to see if you were all right."
4:34:34A low bitter laugh, but she turned to
4:34:36Cassian, looked him over as if she were
4:34:38a queen on a throne, and then declared
4:34:41to all of us, "What do I care?" "I get
4:34:44to be young and beautiful forever, and I
4:34:46never have to go back to those
4:34:47sycophantic fools over the wall. I get
4:34:50to do as I wish, since apparently no one
4:34:53here has any regard for rules or manners
4:34:55or our traditions.
4:34:57Perhaps I should thank you for dragging
4:34:59me into this."
4:35:01Rhys put a hand on the small of my back
4:35:03before the words even struck their
4:35:05target. Nesta snorted. "But it's not me
4:35:08you should be checking on.
4:35:10I had as little at stake on the other
4:35:12side of the wall as I do here."
4:35:15Hate rippled over her features, enough
4:35:17hate that I felt sick. Nesta hissed,
4:35:20"She will not leave her room. She will
4:35:22not stop crying. She will not eat or
4:35:25sleep or drink."
4:35:27Rhys's jaw clenched. "I have asked you
4:35:29over and over if you needed Why should I
4:35:32allow any of you" The last word was shot
4:35:35at Cassian with as much venom as a pit
4:35:37viper to get near her. "It is no one's
4:35:40business but our own."
4:35:42"Elain's mate is here," I said. And it
4:35:45was the wrong thing to utter in Nesta's
4:35:47presence. She went white with rage. "He
4:35:50is no such thing to her," she snarled,
4:35:53advancing on me enough that Rhys slid a
4:35:55shield into place between us, as if he
4:35:57too had glimpsed that mighty power in
4:35:59her eyes that day in Hybern, and did not
4:36:02know how it would manifest.
4:36:04If you bring that male anywhere near
4:36:06her, I'll You're what? Cassian crooned,
4:36:10trailing her at a casual pace as she
4:36:12stopped perhaps 5 ft from me. He lifted
4:36:15a brow as she whirled on him.
4:36:18You won't join me for practice, so you
4:36:20sure as hell aren't going to hold your
4:36:21own in a fight. You won't talk about
4:36:23your powers, so you certainly aren't
4:36:25going to be able to wield them. And you
4:36:28Shut your mouth. She snapped, every inch
4:36:31the conquering empress. I told you to
4:36:33stay the hell away from me, and if you
4:36:36You come between a male and his mate,
4:36:38Nesta Archeron, and you're going to
4:36:40learn about the consequences the hard
4:36:41way. Nesta's nostrils flared. Cassian
4:36:44only gave her a crooked grin. I cut in.
4:36:48If Elain is not up for it, then she
4:36:50won't see him. I won't force the meeting
4:36:52on her.
4:36:53But he does wish to see her, Nesta.
4:36:56I'll ask on his behalf, but
4:36:58the decision will be hers.
4:37:00The male who sold us out to Hybern.
4:37:03It's more complicated than that. Well,
4:37:06it will certainly be more complicated
4:37:08when father returns and finds us gone.
4:37:10What do you plan to tell him about all
4:37:12this?
4:37:14Seeing as how he hasn't sent word from
4:37:16the continent in months, I'll worry
4:37:17about that later. I snapped back. And
4:37:20thank the Cauldron for it that he was
4:37:22off trading in some lucrative territory.
4:37:25Nesta only shook her head, turning
4:37:27toward the chair and her book.
4:37:30I don't care. Do what you want.
4:37:33A stinging dismissal, if not admission
4:37:35that she still trusted me enough to
4:37:36consider Elain's needs first. Rhys
4:37:39jerked his chin at Cassian in a silent
4:37:41order to leave. And as I followed them,
4:37:44I said softly,
4:37:46I'm sorry, Nesta.
4:37:48She didn't answer as she sat stiffly in
4:37:50her chair, picked up her book, and
4:37:52dutifully ignored us. A blow to the face
4:37:55would have been better.
4:37:56When I looked ahead, I found Cassian
4:37:58staring back at Nesta as well.
4:38:01I wondered why no one had yet mentioned
4:38:03what now shown in Cassian's eyes as he
4:38:05gazed at my sister.
4:38:07The sorrow
4:38:08and the longing.
4:38:12The suite was filled with sunlight,
4:38:14every curtain shoved back as far as it
4:38:16could go to let in as much sun as
4:38:18possible, as if any bit of darkness was
4:38:21abhorrent, as if to chase it away.
4:38:24And seated in a small chair before the
4:38:26sunniest of the windows, her back to us,
4:38:29was Elain. Where Nesta had been in
4:38:31contented silence before we found her,
4:38:33Elain's silence was hollow,
4:38:37empty.
4:38:38Her hair was down, not even braided. I
4:38:41couldn't remember the last time I'd seen
4:38:43it unbound. She wore a moon-white silk
4:38:46dressing robe. She did not look, or
4:38:48speak, or even flinch as we entered. Her
4:38:52two thin arms rested on her chair. That
4:38:54iron engagement ring still encircled her
4:38:56finger. Her skin was so pale, it looked
4:38:59like fresh snow in the harsh light.
4:39:02I realized then that the color of death,
4:39:04of sorrow, was white. The lack of color,
4:39:08of vibrancy.
4:39:10I left Cassian and Rhys by the door.
4:39:13Nesta's rage was better than this shell,
4:39:16this void.
4:39:18My breath caught as I edged around her
4:39:20chair, beheld the city view she stared
4:39:22so blankly at.
4:39:24Then beheld the hollowed-out cheeks, the
4:39:26bloodless lips, the brown eyes that had
4:39:28once been rich and warm, and now seemed
4:39:30utterly dull, like grave dirt.
4:39:34She didn't so much as look at me as I
4:39:35said softly,
4:39:37"Elain?"
4:39:39I didn't dare reach for her hand. I
4:39:41didn't dare get too close.
4:39:43I had done this. I had brought this upon
4:39:46them.
4:39:47"I'm back," I added a bit limply,
4:39:50uselessly.
4:39:51All she said was,
4:39:53"I want to go home."
4:39:56I closed my eyes, my chest unbearably
4:39:58tight.
4:39:59"I know
4:40:01he'll be looking for me." she whispered.
4:40:04"I know." I said again.
4:40:06Not Lucian. She wasn't talking about him
4:40:08at all.
4:40:10"We were supposed to be married next
4:40:12week."
4:40:13I put a hand on my chest as if it had
4:40:16stopped the cracking in there.
4:40:18"I'm sorry."
4:40:20Nothing. Not even a flicker of emotion.
4:40:23"Everyone keeps saying that."
4:40:25Her thumb brushed the ring on her
4:40:27finger.
4:40:28"But it doesn't fix anything,
4:40:30does it?"
4:40:32I couldn't get enough air in. I couldn't
4:40:35I couldn't breathe looking at this
4:40:37broken carved out thing my sister had
4:40:39become, what I'd robbed her of, what I'd
4:40:41taken from her.
4:40:43Reece was there, an arm sliding around
4:40:46my waist.
4:40:47"Can we get you anything, Elaine?" He
4:40:50spoke with such gentleness I could
4:40:52barely stand it.
4:40:54"I want to go home." she repeated.
4:40:57I couldn't ask her about Lucian, not
4:41:00now, not yet.
4:41:02I turned away, fully prepared to bolt
4:41:04and completely fall apart in another
4:41:06room, another section of the house.
4:41:09But Lucian was standing in the doorway.
4:41:11And from the devastation on his face, I
4:41:14knew he'd heard every word, seen and
4:41:17heard and felt the hollowness and
4:41:18despair radiating from her.
4:41:21Elaine had always been gentle and sweet,
4:41:23and I had considered it a different sort
4:41:25of strength, a better strength, to look
4:41:28at the hardness of the world and choose,
4:41:31over and over, to love, to be kind.
4:41:34She had been always so full of light.
4:41:38Perhaps that was why she now kept all
4:41:39the curtains open, to fill the void that
4:41:42existed where all of that light had once
4:41:44been.
4:41:45And now nothing remained.
4:41:51Chapter 16
4:41:55Rhysand silently led Lucien to the suite
4:41:57he'd be occupying at the opposite end of
4:41:59the House of Wind. Cassian and I trailed
4:42:01behind, none of us speaking until my
4:42:03mate opened a set of onyx doors to
4:42:06reveal a sunny sitting room carved from
4:42:08more red stone.
4:42:10Beyond the wall of windows, the city
4:42:12flowed far below, the view stretching to
4:42:14the distant jagged mountains and
4:42:16glittering sea.
4:42:18Rhys paused in the center of a midnight
4:42:20blue hand-woven rug and gestured to the
4:42:22sealed doors on his left. "Bedroom." He
4:42:26waved a lazy hand toward the single door
4:42:28on the opposite wall. "Bathing room."
4:42:31Lucien surveyed it all with cool
4:42:33indifference.
4:42:34What he felt about Elain, what he
4:42:36planned to do, I didn't want to ask.
4:42:39"I assume you'll need clothes," Rhys
4:42:42went on, nodding toward Lucien's filthy
4:42:44jacket and pants, which he'd worn for
4:42:46the past week while we scrambled through
4:42:48territories. Indeed, that was blood
4:42:51splattered in several spots.
4:42:53"Any preferences for attire?"
4:42:56That drew Lucien's attention, the male
4:42:58shifting enough to take in Rhys, to note
4:43:01Cassian and me lurking in the doorway.
4:43:03"Is there a cost?"
4:43:05"If you're trying to say that you have
4:43:07no money, don't worry. The clothes are
4:43:09complimentary."
4:43:10Rhys gave him a half smile. "If you're
4:43:12trying to ask if this is some sort of
4:43:14bribe." A shrug. "You are a High Lord's
4:43:18son. It would be bad manners not to
4:43:20house and clothe you in your time of
4:43:22need."
4:43:23Lucien bristled. "Stop baiting him," I
4:43:26shot down the bond. "But it's so fun,"
4:43:29came the purred reply.
4:43:31Something had rattled him. Rattled Rhys
4:43:33enough that taunting Lucien was an easy
4:43:35way to take the edge off.
4:43:37I stepped closer, Cassian remaining
4:43:39behind me as I told Lucien,
4:43:42"We'll be back for dinner in a few
4:43:43hours. Rest a while. Bathe. If you need
4:43:47anything, pull that rope by the door.
4:43:50Lucien stiffened. Not at what I'd said,
4:43:52I realized, but at the tone. A hostess.
4:43:56But he asked,
4:43:57"What of Elain?"
4:44:00"Your call." Rhys offered.
4:44:02"I need to think about it." I answered
4:44:04plainly. "Until I figure out what to do
4:44:07with her, with Nesta, stay out of their
4:44:09way."
4:44:10I added, perhaps too tightly.
4:44:13"This house is warded against winnowing,
4:44:15both from outside and within. There's
4:44:17one way out, the stairs to the city. It,
4:44:20too, is warded and guarded. Please don't
4:44:23do anything stupid."
4:44:25"So, am I a prisoner?"
4:44:27I could feel the response simmering in
4:44:29Rhys, but I shook my head. "No.
4:44:32But understand while you may be her
4:44:34mate, Elain is my sister. I'll do what I
4:44:37must to protect her from further harm."
4:44:40"I would never hurt her."
4:44:41A bleak sort of honesty in his words.
4:44:44I simply nodded, loosening a breath, and
4:44:47met Rhysand's stare in silent urging. My
4:44:50mate gave no indication of my wordless
4:44:52plea as he said, "You are free to wander
4:44:54where you wish, into the city itself if
4:44:57you feel like braving the stairs.
4:44:59But there are two conditions. You are
4:45:01not to take either sister, and you are
4:45:03not to enter their floor.
4:45:05If you require a book from the library,
4:45:07you will ask the servants. If you wish
4:45:09to speak to Elain or Nesta, you will
4:45:11also ask the servants, who will ask us.
4:45:14If you disregard those rules, I'll lock
4:45:17you in a room with Amren."
4:45:19Then Rhys turned away, hand sliding into
4:45:22his pockets as he offered his hook to
4:45:23elbow to me.
4:45:25I looped my arm through his, but said to
4:45:27Lucien,
4:45:28"We'll see you in a few hours." We were
4:45:31almost to the door, Cassian already in
4:45:33the hall, when Lucien said to me,
4:45:36"Thank you."
4:45:38I didn't dare ask him for what.
4:45:43We flew right to Amren's loft, more than
4:45:45a few people waving as we soared over
4:45:47the rooftops of Velaris.
4:45:49My smile wasn't faked when I waved back
4:45:51to them, my people.
4:45:54Rhysand held me a bit tighter while I
4:45:56did so, his own smile as bright as the
4:45:58sun on the Sidra.
4:46:01Mor and Azriel were already waiting
4:46:02inside Amren's apartment, seated like
4:46:05scolded children on the threadbare divan
4:46:07against the wall, while the dark-haired
4:46:09female flipped through the pages of
4:46:11books sprawled around her on the floor.
4:46:14Mor gave me a grateful, relieved look as
4:46:16we entered. Azriel's own face revealing
4:46:19nothing while he stood, keeping a
4:46:21careful, too casual distance from her
4:46:23side.
4:46:25But it was Amren who said from the
4:46:26floor,
4:46:27"You should kill Beron and his sons, and
4:46:30set up the handsome one as High Lord of
4:46:32Autumn, self-imposed exile or no.
4:46:35It will make life easier."
4:46:37"I'll take that into consideration,"
4:46:39Rhys said, striding toward her while I
4:46:42remained with the others.
4:46:43If they were hanging back, Amren had to
4:46:46be in some mood.
4:46:47I blew out a breath.
4:46:49"Who else thinks it's a terrible idea to
4:46:51leave the three of them up at the House
4:46:53of Wind?"
4:46:54Cassian raised his hand as Rhys and Mor
4:46:57chuckled. The High Lord's general said,
4:47:00"I give him an hour before he tries to
4:47:02see her."
4:47:03"30 minutes," Mor countered, sitting
4:47:05back down on the divan and crossing her
4:47:07legs.
4:47:08I cringed.
4:47:10"I guarantee Nesta is now guarding
4:47:12Elain. I think she might honestly kill
4:47:14him if he so much as tries to touch
4:47:16her."
4:47:17"Not without training, she won't,"
4:47:19Cassian grumbled, tucking in his wings
4:47:22as he claimed the seat beside Mor that
4:47:24Azriel had vacated.
4:47:26The Shadow Singer didn't so much as look
4:47:27at it. No,
4:47:29Azriel just walked to the wall beside
4:47:31Cassian and leaned against the wood
4:47:33paneling.
4:47:35But Rhys and the others remained quiet
4:47:37enough that I knew to proceed carefully
4:47:39as I asked Cassian,
4:47:41"Nesta spoke as if you've been up at the
4:47:42house often.
4:47:45You've offered to train her?"
4:47:47Cassian's hazel eyes shuttered as he
4:47:49crossed a booted ankle over another,
4:47:51stretching his muscled legs before him.
4:47:54"I go up there every other day. It's
4:47:56good exercise for my wings."
4:47:59Those wings shifted an emphasis. Not a
4:48:01scratch marred them.
4:48:03"And?"
4:48:04"And what you saw in the library is a
4:48:07pleasanter version of the conversation
4:48:08we always have."
4:48:10Mor's lips pressed into a thin line as
4:48:13if she was trying her best not to say
4:48:15anything.
4:48:16Azriel was trying his best to shoot a
4:48:18warning stare at Mor to remind her to
4:48:20indeed keep her mouth shut as if they'd
4:48:23already discussed this many times.
4:48:26"I don't blame her," Cassian said,
4:48:29shrugging despite his words.
4:48:31"She was violated. Her body stopped
4:48:34belonging wholly to her."
4:48:36His jaw clenched. Even Amren didn't dare
4:48:39say anything.
4:48:40"And I am going to peel the King of
4:48:42Hybern's skin off his bones the next
4:48:44time I see him."
4:48:46His siphons flickered in answer.
4:48:48Rhys said casually,
4:48:50"I'm sure the King will thoroughly enjoy
4:48:52the experience." Cassian glowered. "I
4:48:55mean it."
4:48:56"Oh, I have no doubt that you do."
4:48:59Rhys's violet eyes were dazzling in the
4:49:01dimness of the loft. "But before you
4:49:03lose yourself in plans for revenge, do
4:49:06remember that we have a war to plan
4:49:07first, asshole."
4:49:09A corner of my mate's mouth tugged
4:49:11upward and Rhys was goading him, working
4:49:15Cassian into a temper to keep that
4:49:17brittle edge of guilt from consuming
4:49:18him.
4:49:19The others letting him take on the task,
4:49:22likely having done it several times
4:49:23themselves these weeks.
4:49:26"I am most definitely that," Rhys said,
4:49:29"but the fact still remains that revenge
4:49:31is secondary to winning this war."
4:49:34Cassian opened his mouth as if he'd keep
4:49:36arguing, but Rhys peered at the books
4:49:38scattered on the lush carpet.
4:49:40"Nothing?" he asked Amren.
4:49:43"I don't know why you send those two
4:49:45buffoons" a narrowed glance toward Mor
4:49:47and Azriel "to monitor me."
4:49:51So this was where Azriel had gone, right
4:49:53to the loft, to no doubt spare Mor from
4:49:55enduring Amren duty alone.
4:49:58But Amren's tone, cranky, yes, but
4:50:01perhaps a bit of a front, too, to banish
4:50:04that too fragile gleam in Cassian's
4:50:06eyes. "We're not monitoring you," Mor
4:50:09said, tapping her foot on the carpet.
4:50:11"We're monitoring the book."
4:50:13And as she said it, I felt it, heard it.
4:50:17Amren had placed the Book of Breathings
4:50:19on her nightstand, a glass of old blood
4:50:21atop it. I didn't know whether to laugh
4:50:24or cringe. The latter won as the book
4:50:26murmured, "Hello, sweet-faced liar.
4:50:30Hello, princess with" "Oh, be quiet,"
4:50:33Amren hissed toward the book, who "Shut
4:50:35up."
4:50:36"Odious thing," she muttered, and went
4:50:39back to the tome before her.
4:50:41Rhys gave me a wry smile. "Since the two
4:50:44halves of the book were joined back
4:50:45together, it has been known to speak
4:50:48every now and then."
4:50:50"What does it say?"
4:50:52"Utter nonsense," Amren spat, scowling
4:50:55at the book. "It just likes to hear
4:50:57itself talk, like most of the people
4:50:59cramping up my apartment." Cassian
4:51:02smirked. "Did someone forget to feed
4:51:04Amren again?" She pointed a warning
4:51:06finger at him without so much as looking
4:51:08up. "Is there a reason, Rhysand, why you
4:51:12dragged your yapping pack into my home?"
4:51:15Her home was little more than a giant
4:51:17converted attic, but none of us dared
4:51:19argue as Mor, Cassian, and Azriel
4:51:22finally came closer, forming a small
4:51:24circle around Amren's sprawl in the
4:51:26center of the room.
4:51:28Rhys said to me, "The information you
4:51:31got from Dagdan and Brannagh confirms
4:51:33what we've been gathering ourselves
4:51:34while you were gone, especially Hybern's
4:51:37potential allies in other territories on
4:51:39the continent." "Vultures," Mor
4:51:42muttered, and Cassian looked inclined to
4:51:44agree. But Rhys Rhys had indeed been
4:51:47spying while Azriel had been
4:51:50Rhys snorted. "I can stay hidden, mate."
4:51:54I glared at him, but Azriel cut in.
4:51:56"Having Hybern's movements confirmed by
4:51:58you, Feyre, is what we needed."
4:52:01"Why?" Cassian crossed his arms.
4:52:04"We barely stand a chance of surviving
4:52:06Hybern's armies on our own. If armies
4:52:09from Valahan, Monteser, and Rask join
4:52:11them"
4:52:12He drew a line across his tanned throat.
4:52:14Mor elbowed him in the ribs. Cassian
4:52:17nudged her right back as Azriel shook
4:52:19his head at the both of them, shadows
4:52:21coiling around the tips of his wings.
4:52:24"Are those three territories that
4:52:26powerful?"
4:52:28Perhaps it was a foolish question,
4:52:30showing how little I knew of the Fae
4:52:31lands on the continent. "Yes," Azriel
4:52:35said, no judgement in his hazel eyes.
4:52:38"Valahan has the numbers, Monteser has
4:52:40the money, and Rask
4:52:43it is large enough to have both."
4:52:45"And we have no potential allies amongst
4:52:47the other overseas territories?"
4:52:50Rhys pulled at a stray thread on the
4:52:52cuff of his black jacket.
4:52:54"Not ones that would sail here to help."
4:52:57My stomach turned.
4:52:59"What of Miriam and Drakon?" He'd once
4:53:01refused to consider, but "You fought for
4:53:04Miriam and Drakon centuries ago," I said
4:53:06to Rhys. He'd done a great deal more
4:53:09than that if Jurian was to be believed.
4:53:11"Perhaps it's time to call in that
4:53:13debt."
4:53:14But Rhys shook his head. "We tried.
4:53:17Azriel went to Cretea,
4:53:19the island where Myriam, Drakon, and
4:53:21their unified human and Fae peoples had
4:53:23secretly lived for the past five
4:53:25centuries.
4:53:27"It was abandoned," Azriel said, "in
4:53:30ruin, with no trace of what happened or
4:53:33where they went." "You think Hybern?"
4:53:35"There was no sign of Hybern or of any
4:53:37harm," Mor cut in, her face taut. They
4:53:41had been her friends, too, during the
4:53:43war. Myriam and Drakon and the human
4:53:46queens who had gotten the treaty signed.
4:53:48And it was worry, true, deep worry, that
4:53:51guttered in her brown eyes, in all their
4:53:54eyes.
4:53:55"Then, do you think they heard about
4:53:57Hybern and ran?" I asked. "Drakon had a
4:54:00winged legion," Rhys had once told me.
4:54:02"If there was any chance of finding
4:54:04them,
4:54:05the Drakon and Myriam I knew wouldn't
4:54:07have run, not from this," Rhys said. Mor
4:54:11leaned forward, her golden hair spilling
4:54:14over her shoulders.
4:54:15"But with Jurian now a player in this
4:54:17conflict, Myriam and Drakon, whether
4:54:20they like it or not, have always been
4:54:22tied to him. I don't blame them for
4:54:24running if he truly hunts them." Rhys's
4:54:27face slackened for a heartbeat. "That is
4:54:30what the King of Hybern has on Jurian,"
4:54:32he murmured, "why Jurian works for him."
4:54:35My brow furrowed. "Myriam died, a spear
4:54:39through her chest during that last
4:54:40battle at the sea," Rhys explained. "She
4:54:43bled out while she was carried to
4:54:45safety, but Drakon knew of a sacred
4:54:47hidden island where an object of great
4:54:49and terrible power had been concealed.
4:54:52An object made by the Cauldron itself,
4:54:54legend claimed. He brought her there, to
4:54:57Cretea, used the item to resurrect her,
4:55:00make her immortal, as you were made,
4:55:03Feyre."
4:55:04Amren had said it months ago, that
4:55:07Myriam had been made as I was.
4:55:09Amren seemed to remember it, too, as she
4:55:11said, "The King of Hybern must have
4:55:13promised Jurian to use the Cauldron to
4:55:16track the item to where Miriam and
4:55:18Drakon now live. Perhaps they figured
4:55:20that out and left as fast as they
4:55:23could."
4:55:24And for revenge, for that insane rage
4:55:27that hounded Jurian, he'd do whatever
4:55:29the King of Hybern asked so he could
4:55:31kill Miriam himself.
4:55:34But, where did they go?
4:55:36I looked to Azriel, the Shadowsinger
4:55:38still standing with preternatural
4:55:40stillness against the wall.
4:55:42You found no trace at all of where they
4:55:44might have vanished to?
4:55:46"None." Rhys answered for him. "We've
4:55:49sent messengers back since to no avail."
4:55:53I rubbed at my face, sealing off that
4:55:55path of hope.
4:55:57Then, if they are not a possible ally,
4:56:00how do we keep those other territories
4:56:02on the continent from joining with
4:56:03Hybern, from sending their armies here?
4:56:06I winced.
4:56:08That's our plan, isn't it?
4:56:10Rhys smiled grimly. "It is. One we've
4:56:14been working on while you were away."
4:56:16I waited, trying not to pace as Amren's
4:56:19silver eyes seemed to glow with
4:56:20amusement. "I looked at Hybern first, at
4:56:23its people, as best I could.
4:56:26He'd gone to Hybern."
4:56:28Rhys smirked at the concern flaring
4:56:30across my face.
4:56:32"I'd hoped that Hybern might have some
4:56:34internal conflict to exploit, to get
4:56:36them to collapse from within, that its
4:56:39people might not want this war, might
4:56:41see it as costly and dangerous and
4:56:43unnecessary.
4:56:45But 500 years on that island, with
4:56:47little trade, little opportunity,
4:56:50Hybern's people are hungry for change,
4:56:52or rather, a change back to the old
4:56:55days, when they had human slaves to do
4:56:57their work, when there was no barriers
4:57:00keeping them from what they now perceive
4:57:01as their right."
4:57:03Amren slammed shut the book she'd been
4:57:05perusing. "Fools." She shook her head,
4:57:09inky hair swaying as she scowled up at
4:57:11me.
4:57:12"Hybern's wealth has been dwindling for
4:57:14centuries. Most of their trade routes
4:57:16before the war dealt with the South,
4:57:18with the Black Land. But once it went to
4:57:21the humans,
4:57:22we don't know if Hybern's king
4:57:23deliberately failed to establish new
4:57:25trade routes and opportunities for his
4:57:27people in order to one day fuel this
4:57:30war,
4:57:31or if he was just that short-sighted and
4:57:33let everything fall apart. But for
4:57:36centuries now, Hybern's people have been
4:57:38festering. Hybern let their resentment
4:57:41of their growing stagnation and poverty
4:57:43fester."
4:57:45"There are many High Fae," Mor said
4:57:47carefully, "who believed before the war
4:57:50and still believe now that humans
4:57:54that they are property. There were many
4:57:56High Fae who knew nothing but privilege
4:57:58thanks to those slaves. And when that
4:58:00privilege was ripped away from them,
4:58:02when they were forced to leave their
4:58:03homelands or forced to make room for
4:58:05other High Fae and reform territories,
4:58:07create new ones above that wall,
4:58:11they have not forgotten that anger, even
4:58:13centuries later, especially not in
4:58:15places like Hybern, where their
4:58:17territory and population remained mostly
4:58:19untouched by change.
4:58:22They were one of the few who did not
4:58:23have to yield any land to the wall and
4:58:26did not yield any land to the Fae
4:58:27territories now looking for a new home.
4:58:30Isolated, growing poorer, with no slaves
4:58:33to do their labor,
4:58:35Hybern has long viewed the days before
4:58:37the war as a golden era.
4:58:40And these centuries since as a dark
4:58:42age."
4:58:43I rubbed at my chest.
4:58:45"They're all insane to think that."
4:58:48Rhys nodded. "Yes, they certainly are.
4:58:51But don't forget that their king has
4:58:53encouraged these limited world views. He
4:58:56did not expand their trade routes, did
4:58:58not allow other territories to take any
4:59:00of his land and bring their cultures.
4:59:02He considered where things went wrong
4:59:04for the loyalists in the war, how they
4:59:06ultimately yielded not from being
4:59:08overwhelmed, but because they began
4:59:10arguing amongst themselves.
4:59:12Hybern has had a long, long while to
4:59:15think on those mistakes and how to avoid
4:59:17them at any cost.
4:59:19So, he made sure his people are
4:59:21completely for this war, completely for
4:59:24the idea of the wall coming down because
4:59:26they think it will somehow restore this
4:59:29gilded vision of the past.
4:59:31Hybern's people see their king and their
4:59:33armies not as conquerors, but as
4:59:35liberators of Hybern and those who stand
4:59:37with them. Nausea churned in my gut.
4:59:42How can anyone believe that?
4:59:44Azriel ran a scarred hand through his
4:59:46hair.
4:59:47That's what we've been learning,
4:59:49listening in Hybern and in territories
4:59:52like Rask and Montsere and Valahan.
4:59:56We're to be made an example of, girl,
4:59:58Amren explained. Prythian.
5:00:01We were among the fiercest defenders and
5:00:03negotiators of the treaty.
5:00:05Hybern wants to claim Prythian not only
5:00:07to clear the path to the continent, but
5:00:10to make an example of what happens to
5:00:12Hybern territories that defend the
5:00:14treaty.
5:00:16But, surely other territories would
5:00:18protect it, I said, scanning their
5:00:20faces.
5:00:22Not as many as we'd hoped, Rhys
5:00:24admitted, wincing. There are many, too
5:00:27many, who have also felt squashed and
5:00:29suffocated during these centuries. They
5:00:32want their old lands back beneath the
5:00:34wall and the power and prosperity that
5:00:36came with it. Their vision of the past
5:00:39has been colored by 500 years of
5:00:41struggling to adjust and thrive.
5:00:44Perhaps we did them a disservice, Mor
5:00:46mused, in not sharing enough of our
5:00:48wealth, our territory. Perhaps we are to
5:00:51blame for allowing some of this to rot
5:00:53and fester.
5:00:54That remains to be discussed, Amren
5:00:57said, waving a delicate hand.
5:01:00The point is that we are not facing an
5:01:02army hell-bent on destruction. They are
5:01:05hell-bent on what they believe is
5:01:07liberation of high fae stifled by the
5:01:10wall and what they believe still belongs
5:01:12to them.
5:01:14I swallowed.
5:01:15So, how do the other territories play
5:01:18into it? The three Hybern claims will
5:01:20ally with them.
5:01:22I looked between Rhys and Azriel. You
5:01:24said you were over there.
5:01:27Rhys shrugged. Over there, in Hybern, in
5:01:30the other territories. He winked at my
5:01:32gaping mouth. I had to keep myself busy
5:01:35to avoid missing you.
5:01:37Mor rolled her eyes, but it was Cassian
5:01:39who said, "We can't afford to let those
5:01:42three territories join with Hybern. If
5:01:44they send armies to Prythian, we're
5:01:46done."
5:01:47So, what do we do?
5:01:49Rhys leaned against the carved post of
5:01:51Amren's bed.
5:01:53We've been keeping them busy. He jerked
5:01:55his chin to Azriel. We planted
5:01:57information, truth and lies and a blend
5:02:00of both for them to find, and also
5:02:02scattered some of it among our old
5:02:04allies who are now balking at supporting
5:02:07us.
5:02:08Azriel's smile was a slash of white.
5:02:10Lies and truth, the Shadow Singer and
5:02:13his spies had sewed them in foreign
5:02:14courts.
5:02:16My brow narrowed. You've been playing
5:02:18the territories on the continent off
5:02:20each other?
5:02:21We've been making sure that they're kept
5:02:23busy with each other, Cassian said, a
5:02:25hint of wicked humor glinting in his
5:02:27hazel eyes. Making sure that long-time
5:02:30enemies and rival nations of Rask,
5:02:32Valahan, and Montserre have suddenly
5:02:35received information that has them
5:02:36worried about being attacked and raising
5:02:39their own defenses, which in turn has
5:02:41made Rask, Valahan, and Montserre start
5:02:44looking toward their own borders and not
5:02:46our own.
5:02:48If our allies from the war are too
5:02:50scared to come here to fight, Mor said,
5:02:52folding her arms over her chest. Then as
5:02:55long as they're keeping the others
5:02:56occupied, keeping them from sailing
5:02:58here, we don't care.
5:03:01I blinked at them, at Rhys.
5:03:04Brilliant. Utterly brilliant to keep
5:03:06them so focused and fearful of each
5:03:08other that they stayed away.
5:03:10So, they won't be coming?
5:03:13We can only pray, Amren said. And pray
5:03:17we deal with this fast enough that they
5:03:19don't figure out we've played them at
5:03:21all.
5:03:22What of the human queens, though? I
5:03:24chewed on the tip of my thumb. They have
5:03:26to be aware that no bargain with Hybern
5:03:28would ultimately work to their
5:03:29advantage. Mor braced her forearms on
5:03:32her thighs. Who knows what Hybern
5:03:34promised them, lied about? He already
5:03:37granted them immortality through the
5:03:39Cauldron in exchange for their
5:03:40cooperation. If they were foolish enough
5:03:43to agree to it, then I don't doubt
5:03:45they've already thrown open the gates to
5:03:47him.
5:03:48But we don't know that for certain,
5:03:50Amren countered. And none of it explains
5:03:53why they've been so quiet, locked up in
5:03:55that palace.
5:03:57Rhys and Azriel shook their heads in
5:03:59silent confirmation.
5:04:01I surveyed them, their fading amusement.
5:04:04It drives you mad, doesn't it, that no
5:04:06one has been able to get inside that
5:04:08palace?
5:04:09A low growl from both of them before
5:04:11Azriel muttered, You have no idea.
5:04:14Amren just clicked her tongue, her
5:04:16upswept eyes settling on me. Those
5:04:19Hybern commanders were fools to reveal
5:04:21their plans in regard to breaking the
5:04:23wall. Or perhaps they knew the
5:04:25information would return to us, and
5:04:27their master wants us to stew. I angled
5:04:30my head. You mean shattering the wall
5:04:33through the holes already in it? A bob
5:04:35of her sharp chin as she gestured to the
5:04:38books around her.
5:04:39It's complex spell work, a loophole
5:04:41through the magic that binds the wall.
5:04:44And it implies, Mor said, Fraying
5:04:47deeply.
5:04:48That something might be amiss with the
5:04:50cauldron.
5:04:52I raised my brows considering.
5:04:54Because the cauldron should be able to
5:04:56bring that wall down on its own, right?
5:04:59Right, Rhysand said striding to the book
5:05:02on the nightstand. He didn't dare touch
5:05:05it.
5:05:06Why bother seeking out those holes to
5:05:07help the cauldron when he could unleash
5:05:10its power and be done with it?
5:05:12Maybe he used too much of its power
5:05:14transforming my sisters and those
5:05:16queens. It's likely, Rhysand stalking
5:05:19back to my side. But if he's going to
5:05:21exploit those tears in the wall, we need
5:05:24to find a way to fix them before he can
5:05:26act.
5:05:27I asked Amren, are there spells to patch
5:05:30it up?
5:05:31I'm looking, she said through her teeth.
5:05:34It would help if someone dragged their
5:05:36ass to a library to do more research. We
5:05:39are at your disposal, Cassian offered
5:05:41with a mock bow. I wasn't aware you
5:05:43could read. Amren said sweetly, it could
5:05:46be a fool's errand. Azriel cut in before
5:05:49Cassian could voice the retort dancing
5:05:51in his eyes. To get us to focus on the
5:05:54wall as a decoy while he strikes from
5:05:56another direction.
5:05:58I grimaced at the book. Why not just try
5:06:00to nullify the cauldron again? Because
5:06:03it nearly killed you the last time,
5:06:05Rhysand in a sort of calm steady voice
5:06:07that told me enough. There was no way in
5:06:10hell he'd risk me attempting it again.
5:06:13I straightened.
5:06:14I wasn't prepared in Hybern. None of us
5:06:16were. If I tried again, Mor cut in. If
5:06:20you tried again, it might very well kill
5:06:22you. Not to mention we'd have to
5:06:24actually get to the cauldron, which
5:06:26isn't an option.
5:06:28The king, Azriel clarified at my
5:06:30furrowed brow, won't allow the cauldron
5:06:33out of his sight. And he's rigged it
5:06:35with more spells and traps than the last
5:06:37time.
5:06:38I opened my mouth to object, but the
5:06:40Shadow Singer added, "We looked into it.
5:06:44It's not a viable path."
5:06:46I believed him. The stark honesty in
5:06:48those hazel eyes was confirmation enough
5:06:51that they'd weighed it thoroughly.
5:06:53"Well,
5:06:54if it's too risky to nullify the
5:06:56Cauldron," I mused, "then can I somehow
5:06:59fix the wall? If the wall was made by
5:07:01fairies coming together, and my very
5:07:03magic is a blend of so many?"
5:07:06Amren considered in the silence that
5:07:08fell.
5:07:09"Perhaps. The relationship would be
5:07:12tenuous, but
5:07:14yes, perhaps you could patch it up.
5:07:16Though your sisters, directly forged by
5:07:19the Cauldron itself, might bear the sort
5:07:21of magic we My sisters play no part in
5:07:24this."
5:07:26Another beat of silence, interrupted
5:07:28only by the rustle of Azriel's wings.
5:07:31"I asked them to help once, and look
5:07:33what happened. I won't risk them again."
5:07:36Amren snorted. "You sound exactly like
5:07:38Tamlin."
5:07:40I felt the words like a blow.
5:07:42Rhys slid a hand against my back, having
5:07:44appeared so fast I didn't see him move.
5:07:47But before he could reply, Mor said
5:07:49quietly, "Don't you ever say that sort
5:07:51of [ __ ] again, Amren."
5:07:54There was nothing on Mor's face beyond
5:07:56cold calm, fury.
5:07:58I'd never seen her look so terrifying.
5:08:01She had been furious with the mortal
5:08:03queens, but this This was the face of
5:08:06the High Lord's third in command. "If
5:08:08you're cranky because you're hungry,
5:08:10then tell us." Mor went on with that
5:08:12frozen quiet. "But if you say anything
5:08:15like that again, I will throw you in the
5:08:17gods-damned Sidra."
5:08:19"I'd like to see you try." A little
5:08:22smile was Mor's only answer. Amren slid
5:08:25her attention to me. "We need your
5:08:27sisters. If not for this, then to
5:08:30convince others to join us of the risk,
5:08:33since any would-be ally might have some
5:08:36difficulty believing us after so many
5:08:38years of lies.
5:08:40"Apologize." said Mor.
5:08:43"Mor." I murmured. "Apologize." She
5:08:46hissed at Amren.
5:08:48Amren said nothing. Mor took a step
5:08:50toward her and I said, "She's right."
5:08:53They both looked to me, brows raised. I
5:08:56swallowed. "Amren is right."
5:08:59I walked out of Rhys's touch, realizing
5:09:02he'd kept silent to let me sort it out,
5:09:04let me figure out how to deal with both
5:09:06of them as family, but mostly as their
5:09:09High Lady.
5:09:10Mor's face tightened, but I shook my
5:09:12head.
5:09:13"I can ask my sisters, see if they have
5:09:17any sort of power, see if they'd be
5:09:18willing to talk to others about what
5:09:21they endured, but I won't force them to
5:09:24help if they do not wish to participate.
5:09:27The choice will be theirs."
5:09:29I glanced at my mate, the male who had
5:09:31always presented me with a choice, not
5:09:33as a gift, but as my own gods-given
5:09:36right.
5:09:36Rhys's violet eyes flickered in
5:09:38acknowledgement.
5:09:40"But I'll make our desperation clear."
5:09:43Amren huffed, hardly more than a bird of
5:09:45prey puffing its feathers.
5:09:48"Compromise, Amren." Rhys purred. "It's
5:09:51called compromise." She ignored him.
5:09:54"If you want to start convincing your
5:09:56sisters, get them out of the house.
5:09:59Being cooped up never helped anyone."
5:10:01Rhys said smoothly, "I'm not entirely
5:10:04sure Velaris is prepared for Nesta
5:10:06Archeron."
5:10:07"My sister's not some feral animal." I
5:10:09snapped.
5:10:11Rhys recoiled a bit, the others suddenly
5:10:13finding the carpet, the divan, the books
5:10:16incredibly fascinating. "I didn't mean
5:10:18that."
5:10:19I didn't answer. Mor frowned in
5:10:22disapproval at Rhys, who I felt watching
5:10:24me carefully, but asked me, "What of
5:10:27Imaan?"
5:10:28I shifted slightly, pushing past the
5:10:30words still hanging between me and Rhys.
5:10:33"I can ask, but she might not be ready
5:10:36to be around so many people." I
5:10:38clarified. "She was supposed to be
5:10:40married next week." "So she keeps saying
5:10:43over and over." Amren grumbled. I shot
5:10:46her a glare. "Careful."
5:10:49Amren blinked up at me in surprise, but
5:10:51I went on. "So, we need to find a way to
5:10:54patch up the wall before Hybern uses the
5:10:56Cauldron to break it. And fight this war
5:10:59before any other territories join
5:11:01Hybern's assault. And eventually get the
5:11:03Cauldron itself."
5:11:05"Anything else?"
5:11:07Rhys said behind me, his own voice
5:11:09carefully casual. "That covers it. As
5:11:12soon as a force can be assembled, we
5:11:14take on Hybern."
5:11:16"The Illyrian legions are nearly ready."
5:11:18Cassian said. "No." Rhys said. "I mean a
5:11:22bigger force. A force not just from the
5:11:24Night Court, but from all of Prythian.
5:11:27Our only decent shot at finding allies
5:11:30in this war."
5:11:31None of us spoke. None of us moved as
5:11:34Rhys said simply,
5:11:35"Tomorrow, invitations go out to every
5:11:38High Lord in Prythian for a meeting in 2
5:11:41weeks. It's time we see who stands with
5:11:43us and make sure they understand the
5:11:45consequences
5:11:47if they don't."
5:11:52Chapter 17
5:11:55I let Cassian carry me to the house 2
5:11:57hours later, just because he admitted he
5:11:59was still working to strengthen his
5:12:00wings and needed to push himself. Heat
5:12:03rippled off the tiled roofs and red
5:12:05stone as we soared high over them, the
5:12:08sea breeze a cool kiss against my face.
5:12:11We barely finished debating 30 minutes
5:12:13ago, only stopping when my stomach had
5:12:16grumbled as loudly as a breaking
5:12:17thunderhead.
5:12:19We'd spent our time weighing the merits
5:12:21of where to meet, who to bring along to
5:12:23the meeting with the High Lords.
5:12:25Invitations would go out tomorrow, but
5:12:28not specify the meeting place. There was
5:12:30no point in selecting one, Rhys said,
5:12:32when the high lords would no doubt
5:12:34refuse our initial selection and counter
5:12:36with their own choice of where to
5:12:37gather.
5:12:39All we had chosen was the day and the
5:12:40time, the two weeks a cushion against
5:12:43the bickering that was sure to ensue.
5:12:45The rest, we'd just have to prepare for
5:12:48every possibility.
5:12:50We'd quickly returned to the townhouse
5:12:52to change before heading back up to the
5:12:54house. And I'd found Nuala and Cerridwen
5:12:56waiting in my room, smiles on their
5:12:58shadowy faces.
5:13:00I'd embraced them both, even if Rhys's
5:13:03hello had been less enthusiastic.
5:13:06Not for dislike of the half-wraiths, but
5:13:09I'd snapped at him in Amren's apartment.
5:13:12He hadn't seemed angry, and yet
5:13:15I'd felt him carefully watching me these
5:13:16past few hours. It had made it strange
5:13:19to look at him. Strange enough that the
5:13:22appetite I'd been steadily building had
5:13:24gone a bit queasy.
5:13:25I'd challenged him before, but not as
5:13:28High Lady, not with the tone.
5:13:31So, I didn't get to ask him about it as
5:13:34Nuala and Cerridwen helped me dress, and
5:13:36he headed into the bathing room to wash
5:13:38up.
5:13:39Not that there was much finery to bother
5:13:41with.
5:13:42I'd opted for my Illyrian leather pants
5:13:44and a loose white shirt and a pair of
5:13:46embroidered slippers that Cassian kept
5:13:48snorting at as we flew.
5:13:51When he did so for the third time in 2
5:13:53minutes, I pinched his arm and said,
5:13:55"It's hot. Those boots are stuffy."
5:13:58His brows rose, the portrait of
5:14:00innocence.
5:14:01"I didn't say anything."
5:14:03"You grunted, again."
5:14:06"I've been living with Mor for 500
5:14:07years. I've learned the hard way not to
5:14:09question shoe choices." He smirked.
5:14:12"However stupid they may be."
5:14:15"It's dinner." "Unless there's some
5:14:17battle planned afterward."
5:14:19"Your sister will be there. I'd say
5:14:21that's battle a plenty.
5:14:23I casually studied his face, noting how
5:14:26hard he worked to keep his features
5:14:27neutral, to keep his gaze fixed anywhere
5:14:30but on my own.
5:14:32Reese flew nearby, far enough to remain
5:14:34out of earshot as I said.
5:14:37Would you use her to see if she can
5:14:38somehow fix the wall?
5:14:40Hazel eyes shot to me, fierce and clear.
5:14:44Yes. Not only for our sakes, but
5:14:47she needs to get out of the house. She
5:14:49needs to
5:14:51Cassian's wings kept up a steady booming
5:14:53beat. The new sections only detectable
5:14:55by their lack of scarring.
5:14:57She'll destroy herself if she stays
5:14:59cooped up in there.
5:15:01My chest tightened.
5:15:03Do I thought through my words.
5:15:06The day she was changed, she
5:15:09I felt something different with her.
5:15:11I fought against the tensing in my
5:15:12muscles as I recalled those moments. The
5:15:15screaming and the blood and the nausea
5:15:17as I watched my sisters taken against
5:15:19their will, as I could do nothing, as we
5:15:23I swallowed down the fear, the guilt.
5:15:26It was like everything she was, that
5:15:29steel and fire, it became magnified,
5:15:32cataclysmic, like looking at a house cat
5:15:36and suddenly finding a panther standing
5:15:38there instead.
5:15:39I shook my head as if it would clear
5:15:41away the memory of the predator, the
5:15:43rage simmering in those blue-gray eyes.
5:15:47I will never forget those moments.
5:15:50Cassian said quietly, sensing or sensing
5:15:53the memories wreaking havoc on me.
5:15:55As long as I live.
5:15:58Have you seen any glimpse of it since?
5:16:00Nothing.
5:16:01The house loomed, golden lights at the
5:16:04walls of windows and doorways beckoning
5:16:06us closer.
5:16:08But I can feel it, sometimes.
5:16:10He added a bit ruefully. Usually when
5:16:13she's pissed at me, which is most of the
5:16:15time.
5:16:17Why?
5:16:18They'd always been at each other's
5:16:19throats, but this? Yes, the dynamic
5:16:23between them had been different earlier,
5:16:25sharper.
5:16:27Cassian shook his dark hair out of his
5:16:29eyes, slightly longer than the last time
5:16:31I'd seen it.
5:16:33I don't think Nesta will ever forgive me
5:16:35for what happened in Hybern. To her, but
5:16:38mostly to Elain.
5:16:40Your wings were shredded. You were
5:16:42barely alive.
5:16:44For that was guilt, ravaging and
5:16:46poisonous in each of Cassian's words.
5:16:48What the others had been fighting
5:16:50against in the loft. You were in no
5:16:52position to save anyone.
5:16:54I made her a promise. The wind ruffled
5:16:57Cassian's hair as he squinted at the
5:16:59sky. And when it mattered, I didn't keep
5:17:03it.
5:17:04I still dreamed of him trying to crawl
5:17:06toward her, reaching for her even in the
5:17:08semi-unconscious state the pain and
5:17:10blood loss had thrown him into.
5:17:12As Rhysand had once done for me during
5:17:14those last moments with Amarantha.
5:17:17Perhaps only a few wingbeats separated
5:17:20us from the broad landing veranda, but I
5:17:22asked, "Why do you bother, Cassian?"
5:17:25His hazel eyes shuttered as we smoothly
5:17:28landed. And I thought he wouldn't
5:17:30answer, especially not as we heard the
5:17:32others already in the dining room beyond
5:17:34the veranda. Especially not when Rhys
5:17:36gracefully landed beside us and strode
5:17:39in ahead with a wink.
5:17:41But Cassian said quietly as we headed
5:17:43for the dining room,
5:17:45"Because I can't stay away."
5:17:50Elain, not surprisingly, didn't leave
5:17:52her room. Nesta, surprisingly, did.
5:17:56It wasn't a formal dinner by any means,
5:17:58though Lucien, standing near the windows
5:18:00and watching the sun set over Velaris,
5:18:03was wearing a fine green jacket
5:18:05embroidered with gold, his cream-colored
5:18:07pants showing off muscled thighs, and
5:18:09his knee-high black boots polished
5:18:11enough that the chandeliers of Feyre
5:18:13light reflected off them.
5:18:15He'd always had a casual grace about
5:18:17him, but here, tonight, with his hair
5:18:20tied back and jacket buttoned to his
5:18:22neck, he truly looked the part of a high
5:18:24lord's son. Handsome, powerful, a bit
5:18:28rakish, but well-mannered and elegant.
5:18:31I aimed for him as the others helped
5:18:33themselves to the wine breathing into
5:18:35decanters on the ancient wood table,
5:18:37keenly aware that while my friends
5:18:39chatted, they kept one eye on us. Lucien
5:18:42ran his one eye over me, my casual
5:18:45attire, then the Illyrians in their
5:18:47leathers, and Amren in her usual gray,
5:18:50and Mor in her flowing red gown, and
5:18:52said,
5:18:53"What is the dress code?" I shrugged,
5:18:56passing him the glass of wine I'd
5:18:58brought over.
5:18:59"It's whatever we feel like."
5:19:02That gold eye clicked and narrowed, then
5:19:04returned to the city ahead.
5:19:06"What did you do with yourself this
5:19:08afternoon?"
5:19:09"Slept," he said. "Washed, sat on my
5:19:12ass."
5:19:14"I could give you a tour of the city
5:19:15tomorrow morning," I offered, "if you
5:19:17like."
5:19:18Never mind that we had a meeting to plan
5:19:20for, a wall to heal, a war to fight. I
5:19:24could set aside half a day, show him why
5:19:27this place had become my home, why I had
5:19:29fallen in love with its ruler.
5:19:32As if sensing my thoughts, Lucien said,
5:19:35"You don't need to waste your time
5:19:36convincing me. I get it. I get
5:19:40I get that we were not what you wanted
5:19:42or needed. How small and isolated our
5:19:45home must have been for you once you saw
5:19:47this."
5:19:48He jerked his chin toward the city,
5:19:50where lights were now sparking into view
5:19:52amid the falling twilight. "Who could
5:19:54compare?"
5:19:56I almost said, "Don't you mean what
5:19:58could compare?" but held my tongue.
5:20:01His focus shifted behind me before he
5:20:03replied, and Lucien shut his mouth, his
5:20:06metal eye words softly.
5:20:08I followed his glance and tried not to
5:20:10tense as Nesta stepped into the room.
5:20:13Yes, devastating was a good word for how
5:20:16lovely she'd become as High Fae.
5:20:18And in a long-sleeved dark blue gown
5:20:20that clung to her curves before falling
5:20:22gracefully to the ground in a spill of
5:20:24fabric,
5:20:25Cassian looked like someone had punched
5:20:27him in the gut.
5:20:29But Nesta stared right at me, the
5:20:31faelight shimmering along the silver
5:20:33combs in her upswept hair.
5:20:35The others she dutifully ignored, chin
5:20:37lifting as she strode for us.
5:20:40I prayed that Mor and Amren, their brows
5:20:42high, wouldn't say any "Where did that
5:20:45dress come from?" Mor said, red gown
5:20:48flowing behind her as she breezed toward
5:20:50Nesta. My sister drew up short,
5:20:52shoulders tensing, readying to but Mor
5:20:55was already there, fingering the heavy
5:20:58blue fabric, surveying every stitch.
5:21:01"I want one," she pouted, her attempt,
5:21:04no doubt, to segue into an invitation to
5:21:06shop for a larger wardrobe with me.
5:21:09As High Lady, I'd need clothes, fancier
5:21:11ones, especially for this meeting. My
5:21:14sisters', too.
5:21:16Mor's brown eyes flicked to mine, and I
5:21:19had to fight the crushing gratitude that
5:21:21threatened to make my own burn as I
5:21:23approached them.
5:21:24"I assume my mate dug it up somewhere,"
5:21:26I said, throwing a glance over my
5:21:28shoulder at Rhys, who was perched on the
5:21:31edge of the dining table, flanked by Az
5:21:33and Cassian, all three Illyrians
5:21:35pretending that they weren't listening
5:21:37to every word as they poured the wine
5:21:39amongst themselves.
5:21:41Busy bodies. I sent the thought down the
5:21:43bond, and Rhys's dark laughter echoed in
5:21:46return. "He gets all the credit for
5:21:49clothes," Mor said, examining the fabric
5:21:51of Nesta's skirt while my sister
5:21:53monitored like a hawk. "And he never
5:21:55tells me where he finds them. He still
5:21:58won't tell me where he found Feyre's
5:21:59dress for Starfall." She threw a glare
5:22:02her shoulder. Bastard.
5:22:04Rhys chuckled. Cassian, however, didn't
5:22:07smile. Every pore of him seemingly fixed
5:22:10on Nesta and Mor, on what my sister
5:22:12would do.
5:22:14Mor only examined the silver combs in
5:22:16Nesta's hair.
5:22:18It's a good thing we're not the same
5:22:19size, or else I might be tempted to
5:22:21steal that dress. Likely right off her,
5:22:24Cassian muttered. Mor's answering smirk
5:22:27wasn't reassuring.
5:22:29But Nesta's face remained blank, cold.
5:22:32She looked Mor up and down, noting the
5:22:34dress that exposed much of her midriff,
5:22:37back, and chest, then the flowing skirts
5:22:39with sheer panels that revealed glimpses
5:22:41of her legs, scandalous by human
5:22:44fashions.
5:22:46Fortunately for you, Nesta said flatly,
5:22:49I don't return the sentiment.
5:22:51Azriel coughed into his wine.
5:22:54But Nesta only walked to the table and
5:22:56claimed a seat. Mor blinked, but
5:22:59confided to me with a wink, I think
5:23:01we're going to need a lot more wine.
5:23:04Nesta's spine stiffened, but she said
5:23:06nothing.
5:23:07I'll raid the collection, Cassian
5:23:09offered, disappearing through the inner
5:23:11hall doors too quickly to be casual.
5:23:14Nesta stiffened a bit more.
5:23:16Teasing my sister, poking fun at her?
5:23:19I snatched a seat at Nesta's side and
5:23:21murmured, They mean well.
5:23:24Nesta just ran a finger over her ivory
5:23:26and obsidian place setting, examining
5:23:28the silverware with vines of
5:23:29night-blooming jasmine engraved around
5:23:31the hilts.
5:23:33I don't care.
5:23:35Amren slid into the seat across from me
5:23:37right as Cassian returned, a bottle in
5:23:39each hand, and cringed. Amren said to my
5:23:42sister, You're a real piece of work.
5:23:45Nesta's eyes flicked up. Amren idly
5:23:48swirled a goblet of blood, watching her
5:23:50like a cat with a new, interesting toy.
5:23:53Nesta only said, Why do your eyes glow?
5:23:57Little curiosity, just a blunt need for
5:23:59explanation, and no fear, none.
5:24:03Amren angled her head.
5:24:04You know, none of these busybodies have
5:24:07ever asked me that. Those busybodies
5:24:10were trying not to look too concerned,
5:24:12as was I.
5:24:13Nesta only waited.
5:24:15Amren sighed, her dark bob swaying. They
5:24:18glow because it was the one part of me
5:24:20the containment spell could not quite
5:24:22get right. The one glimpse into what
5:24:25lurks beneath.
5:24:27And what is beneath?
5:24:29None of the others spoke, or even moved.
5:24:32Lucien, still by the window, had turned
5:24:34the color of fresh paper.
5:24:36Amren traced a finger along the rim of
5:24:38her goblet, her red-tinted nail gleaming
5:24:41as bright as the blood inside.
5:24:43They never dared ask me that, either.
5:24:46Why?
5:24:48Because it is not polite to ask. And
5:24:51they are afraid.
5:24:53Amren held Nesta's stare, and my sister
5:24:55did not balk, did not flinch.
5:24:58We are the same, you and I, Amren said.
5:25:02I wasn't sure I was breathing. Through
5:25:05the bond, I wasn't sure Rhys was,
5:25:07either. Not in flesh, not in the thing
5:25:10that prowls beneath our skin and bones.
5:25:13Amren's remarkable eyes narrowed, but I
5:25:17see the kernel, girl. Amren nodded, more
5:25:20to herself than anyone. You did not fit
5:25:23the mold that they shoved you into, the
5:25:26path you were born upon and forced to
5:25:28walk. You tried, and yet you did not,
5:25:31could not fit. And then the path
5:25:34changed. A little nod.
5:25:37I know what it is to be that way. I
5:25:40remember it, long ago as it was.
5:25:43Nesta had mastered the fae's
5:25:45preternatural stillness far more quickly
5:25:47than I had.
5:25:49And she sat there for a few heartbeats,
5:25:51simply staring at the strange, delicate
5:25:53female across from her, weighing the
5:25:55words, the power that radiated from
5:25:58Amren.
5:25:59And then Nesta merely said,
5:26:01"I don't know what you're talking
5:26:02about."
5:26:04Amren's red lips parted in a wide,
5:26:06serpentine smile. "When you erupt, girl,
5:26:10make sure it is felt across worlds."
5:26:13A shiver slithered down my skin, but
5:26:15Rhys drawled, "Amren, it seems, has been
5:26:19taking drama lessons at the theater down
5:26:20the street from her house." She shot him
5:26:23a glare. "I mean it, Rhysand." "I'm sure
5:26:26you do," he said, claiming the seat to
5:26:29my right. "But I'd prefer to eat
5:26:31something before you make us lose our
5:26:33appetites." His broad hand warmed my
5:26:35knee as he clasped it beneath the table,
5:26:38giving me a reassuring squeeze.
5:26:40Cassian took the seat on Amren's left,
5:26:43Azriel beside him, Mor grabbing the seat
5:26:45opposite him, leaving Lucien.
5:26:48Lucien frowned at the remaining place
5:26:50setting at the head of the table, then
5:26:52at the blank, barren spot across from
5:26:54Nesta.
5:26:56"I
5:26:57shouldn't you sit at the head?"
5:26:59Rhys raised an eyebrow.
5:27:01"I don't care where you sit. I only care
5:27:03about eating something, right?" He
5:27:05snapped his fingers. "Now."
5:27:08The food, prepared by cooks I made a
5:27:10point to go meet in the belly of the
5:27:12house, appeared across the table in
5:27:14platters and spreads and bowls. Roast
5:27:17meats, various sauces and gravies, rice
5:27:20and bread, steamed vegetables fresh from
5:27:23the surrounding farms.
5:27:25I nearly sighed at the smells curling
5:27:27around me. Lucien slid into his seat,
5:27:30looking for all the world like he was
5:27:31perching atop a pin cushion. I leaned
5:27:34past Nesta to explain to Lucien, "You
5:27:37get used to it, the informality."
5:27:39"You say that, Feyre darling, like it's
5:27:41a bad thing," Rhys said, helping himself
5:27:44to a platter of pan-fried trout before
5:27:46passing it to me. I rolled my eyes,
5:27:49sliding a few crispy pieces onto my
5:27:51plate. It took me by surprise that first
5:27:54dinner we all had, just so you know.
5:27:56"Oh, I know." Rhys grinned. Cassian
5:27:59sniggered. "Honestly," I said to Lucien,
5:28:03who wordlessly stacked a pile of buttery
5:28:05green beans onto his plate, but didn't
5:28:07touch it, perhaps marveling at the
5:28:09simple fare, so at odds with the
5:28:11over-wrought dishes of spring.
5:28:13Azriel is the only polite one." A few
5:28:16cries of outrage from Mor and Cassian,
5:28:19but a ghost of a smile danced on the
5:28:20Shadow Singer's mouth as he dipped his
5:28:23head and hauled a platter of roast beets
5:28:25sprinkled with goat cheese toward
5:28:27himself. "Don't even try to pretend that
5:28:29it's not true." "Of course it's true,"
5:28:32Mor said with a loud sigh, "but you
5:28:34needn't make us sound like heathens."
5:28:37"I would have thought you'd find that
5:28:38term to be a compliment, Mor," Rhys said
5:28:41mildly.
5:28:42Nesta was watching the volley of words
5:28:44as if it were a sparring match, eyes
5:28:46darting between us. She didn't reach for
5:28:49any food, so I took the liberty of
5:28:51dumping spoonfuls of various things onto
5:28:53her plate. She watched that, too.
5:28:56And when I paused, moving on to further
5:28:58fill my own plate, Nesta said,
5:29:01"I understand what you meant about the
5:29:04food."
5:29:05It took me a moment to recall, to
5:29:08remember that particular conversation
5:29:10back at our father's estate, when she
5:29:12and I had been at each other's throats
5:29:13over the differences between human and
5:29:15fae food.
5:29:17"It was the same in terms of what was
5:29:19served, but it just tasted better above
5:29:22the wall."
5:29:23"Is that a compliment?" Nesta didn't
5:29:26return my smile as she speared some
5:29:28asparagus with her fork and dug in. And
5:29:31I figured it was as good a time as any
5:29:33as I said to Cassian,
5:29:35"What time are we back in the training
5:29:36ring tomorrow?"
5:29:38To his credit, Cassian didn't so much as
5:29:40glance at Nesta as he replied
5:29:42[clears throat] with a lazy smile. "I'd
5:29:44say dawn, but since I'm feeling rather
5:29:46grateful that you're back in one piece,
5:29:49I'll let you sleep in. Let's meet at
5:29:517:00."
5:29:52"I'd hardly call that sleeping in." I
5:29:55said. "For an Illyrian, it is." Mor
5:29:58muttered. Cassian's wings rustled.
5:30:01"Daylight is a precious resource." "We
5:30:03live in the night court." Mor countered.
5:30:06Cassian only grimaced at Rhys and
5:30:08Azriel. "I told you that the moment we
5:30:10started letting females into our group
5:30:12they'd be nothing but trouble."
5:30:15"As far as I can recall, Cassian." Rhys
5:30:17countered dryly. "You actually said you
5:30:20needed a reprieve from staring at our
5:30:22ugly faces and that some ladies would
5:30:25add some much needed prettiness for you
5:30:26to look at all day." "Pig." Amren said.
5:30:30Cassian gave her a vulgar gesture that
5:30:32made Lucien choke on his green beans.
5:30:35"I was a young Illyrian and didn't know
5:30:37better." he said, then pointed his fork
5:30:40at Azriel. "Don't try to blend into the
5:30:42shadows. You said the same thing."
5:30:45"He did not." Mor said, and the shadows
5:30:47that Azriel had indeed been subtly
5:30:49weaving around himself vanished. "Azriel
5:30:52has never once said anything that awful.
5:30:55Only you, Cassian. Only you."
5:30:58The general of the High Lord's armies
5:31:00stuck out his tongue. Mor returned the
5:31:02gesture.
5:31:03Amren scowled at Rhys. "You'd be wise to
5:31:06leave both of them at home for the
5:31:08meeting with the others, Rhys and
5:31:10they'll cause nothing but trouble."
5:31:12>> [snorts]
5:31:12>> I dared to peek at Lucien just to gauge
5:31:14his reaction.
5:31:16His face was indeed controlled, but a
5:31:19hint of surprise twinkled there.
5:31:21Weariness too, but surprise.
5:31:25I risked another glance at Nesta, but
5:31:27she was watching her plate, dutifully
5:31:29ignoring the others.
5:31:31Rhys said, "It remains to be seen if
5:31:34they'll be joining us."
5:31:35Lucien looked at him then. the curiosity
5:31:38in that one eye unmistakable. Rhys noted
5:31:41it and shrugged.
5:31:43You'll find out soon enough, I suppose.
5:31:45Invitations are going out tomorrow,
5:31:47calling all the High Lords to gather to
5:31:49discuss this war.
5:31:51Lucien's hand tightened on his fork.
5:31:54All?
5:31:55I wasn't sure if he meant Tamlin or his
5:31:57father, but Rhys nodded nonetheless.
5:32:00Lucien considered.
5:32:02Can I offer my unsolicited advice?
5:32:05Rhys smirked. I think that's the first
5:32:07time anyone at this table has ever asked
5:32:10such a thing.
5:32:11Mor [clears throat] and Cassian now
5:32:12stuck out their tongues at him,
5:32:14but Rhys waved a lazy hand at Lucien. By
5:32:17all means, advise away.
5:32:20Lucien studied my mate, then me.
5:32:23I assume Feyre is going?
5:32:26I am.
5:32:27Amren sipped from her glass of blood,
5:32:29the only sound in the room as Lucien
5:32:31considered again. Are you planning to
5:32:33hide her powers? Silence.
5:32:36Rhys at last said,
5:32:38That was something I'd planned to
5:32:39discuss with my mate. Are you leaning
5:32:42one way or another, Lucien?
5:32:45There was still something sharp in his
5:32:47tone, something just a little vicious.
5:32:49Lucien studied me again, and it was an
5:32:52effort not to squirm.
5:32:54My father would likely join with Hybern
5:32:56if he thought he stood a chance of
5:32:58getting his power back that way, by
5:33:00killing you.
5:33:02A snarl from Rhys. Your brothers saw me,
5:33:05though, I said, setting down my fork.
5:33:08Perhaps they could mistake the flame as
5:33:09yours, but the ice
5:33:12Lucien jerked his chin to Azriel. That's
5:33:14the information you need to gather. What
5:33:17my father knows, if my brothers realized
5:33:19what she was doing. You need to start
5:33:21from there, and build your plan for this
5:33:23meeting accordingly.
5:33:25Mor said, Eris might keep that
5:33:28information to himself and convince the
5:33:30others too, as well, if he thinks it'll
5:33:32be more useful that way.
5:33:34I wondered if Mor looked at that red
5:33:36hair, the golden brown skin that was a
5:33:38few shades darker than his brother's,
5:33:40and still saw Eris.
5:33:43Lucien said evenly,
5:33:45perhaps, but we need to find that out.
5:33:48If Beron or Eris has that information,
5:33:50they'll use it to their advantage in
5:33:52that meeting, to control it, or control
5:33:55you. Or they might not show up at all,
5:33:57and instead go right to Hybern.
5:34:00Cassian swore softly, and I was inclined
5:34:03to echo the sentiment. Rhys swirled his
5:34:05wine once, set it down, and said to
5:34:07Lucien,
5:34:09you and Azriel should talk, tomorrow.
5:34:12Lucien glanced toward the Shadow Singer,
5:34:14who only nodded at him.
5:34:16I'm at your disposal.
5:34:18None of us were dumb enough to ask if
5:34:20he'd be willing to reveal details on the
5:34:22Spring Court, if he thought that Tamlin
5:34:24would arrive.
5:34:25That was perhaps a conversation best
5:34:27left for another time, with just him and
5:34:30me.
5:34:31Rhys leaned back in his seat,
5:34:33contemplating something.
5:34:36His jaw tightened, then he let out a
5:34:38near silent huff of air, steeling
5:34:40himself for whatever he was about to
5:34:43reveal, whatever plans he had decided
5:34:45not to reveal until now.
5:34:47And even as my stomach tightened, some
5:34:49sort of thrill went through me at it, at
5:34:52that clever mind at work.
5:34:54Until Rhys said,
5:34:56there is another meeting that needs to
5:34:57be had, and soon.
5:35:03Chapter 18.
5:35:06Please don't say we need to go to the
5:35:07Court of Nightmares, Cassian grumbled
5:35:10around a mouthful of food. Rhys lifted a
5:35:12brow.
5:35:13Not in the mood to terrorize our friends
5:35:15there? Mor's golden face paled.
5:35:19You mean to ask my father to fight in
5:35:20this war? She said to Rhys.
5:35:23I reined in my sharp intake of breath.
5:35:26What is the Court of Nightmares?" Nesta
5:35:28demanded. Lucien answered for us.
5:35:31"The place where the rest of the world
5:35:33believes the majority of the Night Court
5:35:35to be." He jerked his chin at Rhys. "The
5:35:38seat of his power. Or it was."
5:35:42"Oh, it still is." Rhys said. "To
5:35:44everyone outside Velaris." He leveled a
5:35:47steady look at Mor. "And yes, Keir's
5:35:50Darkbringer Legion is considerable
5:35:52enough that a meeting is warranted."
5:35:55The last meeting had resulted in Keir's
5:35:56arm being shattered in so many places it
5:35:59had gone saggy. I doubted the male would
5:36:01be inclined to help us anytime soon.
5:36:04Perhaps why Rhys wanted this meeting.
5:36:06Nesta's brows narrowed. "Why not just
5:36:09order them? Don't they answer to you?"
5:36:12Cassian set down his fork, food
5:36:14forgotten.
5:36:15"Unfortunately, there are protocols in
5:36:17place between our two sub-courts
5:36:19regarding this sort of thing. They
5:36:21mostly govern themselves with Mor's
5:36:24father, their steward."
5:36:26Mor's throat bobbed. Azriel watched her
5:36:28carefully, his mouth a tight line. "The
5:36:31steward of the Hewn City is legally
5:36:33entitled to refuse to aid my armies."
5:36:36Rhys explained to Nesta. To me.
5:36:38"It was part of the agreement my
5:36:40ancestor made with the Court of
5:36:41Nightmares all those thousands of years
5:36:43ago.
5:36:44They would remain within that mountain,
5:36:46would not challenge or disturb us beyond
5:36:48its borders,
5:36:50and would retain the right to decide not
5:36:52to assist in war."
5:36:55"And have they refused?" I asked. Mor
5:36:58nodded gravely.
5:37:00"Twice. Not my father." She nearly
5:37:02choked on the word.
5:37:04"But there were two wars long, long ago
5:37:08they chose not to fight. We won, but
5:37:11barely. At great cost."
5:37:14And with this war upon us, we would need
5:37:16every ally we could muster, every army.
5:37:19"We leave in two days." Rhys said.
5:37:22"He'll say no," Mor countered. "Don't
5:37:24waste your time."
5:37:26"Then I shall have to find a way to
5:37:27convince him otherwise."
5:37:30Mor's eyes flashed. "What?"
5:37:33Azriel and Cassian shifted in their
5:37:34seats, and Amren clicked her tongue at
5:37:37Rhys disapproval. "He fought in the
5:37:39war," Rhys said calmly. "Perhaps we'll
5:37:42be lucky this time, too."
5:37:44"I'll remind you that the Darkbringer
5:37:46Legion was nearly as bad as the enemy
5:37:48when it came to their behavior," Mor
5:37:51said, pushing her plate away.
5:37:53"There will be new rules." "You will not
5:37:55be in a position to make rules, and you
5:37:57know it," Mor snapped. Rhys only swirled
5:38:00his wine again. "We'll see."
5:38:03I glanced to Cassian. The general shook
5:38:05his head subtly. Stay out of this one
5:38:08for now.
5:38:09I swallowed, nodding back with equal
5:38:11faintness.
5:38:13Mor whipped her head toward Azriel.
5:38:15"What do you think?" The Shadow Singer
5:38:17held her stare, his face unreadable.
5:38:20"Considering." I tried not to hold my
5:38:22breath. Defending the female he loved or
5:38:25siding with his High Lord.
5:38:27"It's not my call to make." "That's a
5:38:30[ __ ] answer," Mor challenged. I
5:38:33could have sworn hurt flickered in
5:38:34Azriel's eyes, but he only shrugged, his
5:38:37face again a mask of cold indifference.
5:38:40Mor's lips pursed.
5:38:42"You don't need to come, Mor," Rhys said
5:38:45with that calm, even voice. "Of course
5:38:48I'm coming. It'll make it worse if I'm
5:38:50not there." She drained her wine in one
5:38:52swift tilt of her head.
5:38:54"I suppose I have two days now to find a
5:38:56dress suitable to horrify my father."
5:38:59Amren, at least, chuckled at that,
5:39:02Cassian rumbling a laugh as well.
5:39:04But Rhys watched Mor for a long minute,
5:39:07some of the stars in his eyes winking
5:39:09out.
5:39:10I debated asking if there was some other
5:39:12way, some path to avoid this awfulness
5:39:14between us, but
5:39:16earlier I had snapped at him, and with
5:39:19Lucien and my sister here,
5:39:21I kept my mouth shut. Well, about that
5:39:24matter. In the silence that fell, I
5:39:26scrambled for any scrap of normalcy and
5:39:29turned again to Cassian.
5:39:31Let's train at 8:00 tomorrow. I'll meet
5:39:33you in the ring.
5:39:347:30, he said with a disarming grin, one
5:39:38that most of his enemies would likely
5:39:39run from. Lucien went back to picking at
5:39:42his food. Mor refilled her wine glass,
5:39:45Azriel every move she made, his fork
5:39:48clenched in his scarred hand.
5:39:508:00, I countered with a flat look. I
5:39:53turned to Nesta, silent and watchful
5:39:55through all of this.
5:39:57Care to join?
5:39:58No.
5:39:59The beat of silence was too pointed to
5:40:01be dismissed, but I gave my sister a
5:40:04casual shrug, reaching for the wine jug.
5:40:06Then I said to none of them in
5:40:08particular,
5:40:09I want to learn how to fly.
5:40:12Mor spewed her wine across the table,
5:40:14splattering it right across Azriel's
5:40:16chest and neck. The Shadow Singer was
5:40:18too busy gawking at me to even notice.
5:40:21Cassian looked torn between howling at
5:40:23Azriel and gaping.
5:40:26My magic was still too weak to grow
5:40:27those Illyrian wings, but I gestured to
5:40:30the Illyrians and said,
5:40:32I want you to teach me.
5:40:34Mor blurted, "Really?" while Lucien
5:40:37Lucien said, "Well, that explains the
5:40:40wings." Nesta leaned forward to appraise
5:40:42me. "What wings?"
5:40:45I can shape-shift, I admitted. And with
5:40:49the oncoming conflict, I declared to all
5:40:52of them, "Knowing how to fly might be
5:40:55useful." I jerked my chin toward
5:40:57Cassian, who now studied me with
5:40:59unnerving intensity, sizing me up.
5:41:02I assume the battles against Hybern will
5:41:04include Illyrians. A shallow nod from
5:41:06the general.
5:41:08Then I plan to fight with you in the
5:41:10skies.
5:41:11I waited for the objections, for Rhys to
5:41:14shut it down.
5:41:15There was only the howling wind outside
5:41:17the dining room windows.
5:41:19Cassian whooshed out a breath.
5:41:21I don't know if it's technically even
5:41:23possible, time-wise. You'd have to learn
5:41:26not only how to fly, but how to bear the
5:41:28weight of your shield and weapons, and
5:41:30how to work with an Illyrian unit. It
5:41:33takes us decades to master that last
5:41:35part alone. We have months at best,
5:41:38weeks at worst.
5:41:40My chest sank a bit.
5:41:42Then we'll teach her what we know until
5:41:44then, Rhys said, but the stars in his
5:41:46eyes turned stone cold as he added, I'll
5:41:49give her any shot at an advantage, at
5:41:52getting away if things go to [ __ ] Even
5:41:54a day of training might make a
5:41:56difference.
5:41:57Azriel tucked in his wings, his
5:41:59beautiful features uncharacteristically
5:42:01soft, contemplative. I'll teach you.
5:42:05Are you certain? I asked. The unreadable
5:42:09mask slipped back over Azriel's face.
5:42:11Rhys and Cass were taught how to fly so
5:42:13young that they barely remember it. But
5:42:16Azriel, locked in his hateful father's
5:42:18dungeons like some criminal until he was
5:42:2011, denied the ability to fly, to fight,
5:42:24to do anything his Illyrian instincts
5:42:26screamed at him to do.
5:42:28Darkness rumbled down the bond, not
5:42:31anger at me, but as Rhys too remembered
5:42:34what had been done to his friend. He'd
5:42:36never forgotten. None of them had. It
5:42:39was an effort not to look at the brutal
5:42:41scars coating Azriel's hands. I prayed
5:42:44Nesta wouldn't inquire about it.
5:42:46We've taught plenty of younglings the
5:42:48basics, Cassian countered. Azriel shook
5:42:51his head, shadows twining around his
5:42:53wrists.
5:42:55It's not the same when you're older. The
5:42:57fears, the mental blocks,
5:43:00it's different.
5:43:01None of them, not even Amren, said
5:43:03anything.
5:43:05Azriel only said to me,
5:43:07I'll teach you. Train with Cassian for a
5:43:09few hours and I'll meet you when you're
5:43:11through." He added to Lucien, who did
5:43:14not balk from those writhing shadows,
5:43:16"After lunch, we'll meet." I swallowed,
5:43:20but nodded, "Thank you."
5:43:22And perhaps Azriel's kindness snapped
5:43:24some sort of tether in me, but I turned
5:43:27to Nesta.
5:43:28"The King of Hybern is trying to bring
5:43:30down the wall by using the Cauldron to
5:43:32expand the holes already in it."
5:43:35Her blue-gray eyes revealed nothing,
5:43:37only simmering rage at the King's name.
5:43:40"I might be able to patch up those
5:43:41holes, but you, being made of the
5:43:44Cauldron itself, if the Cauldron can
5:43:47widen those holes, perhaps you can close
5:43:49them, too. With training in whatever
5:43:52time we have, I can show you." Amren
5:43:55clarified to my sister, "Or in theory, I
5:43:58can. If we start soon, tomorrow
5:44:01morning." She considered, then declared
5:44:04to Rhys, "When you go to the Court of
5:44:06Nightmares, we will go with you." I
5:44:09whipped my head to Amren. "What?" The
5:44:11thought of Nesta in that place. "The
5:44:13Hewn City is a trove of objects of
5:44:16power," Amren explained. "There may be
5:44:18opportunities to practice. Let the girl
5:44:21get a feel for what something like the
5:44:23wall or the Cauldron might be like." She
5:44:26added when Azriel seemed poised to
5:44:27object, "Covertly."
5:44:30Nesta said nothing. I waited for her
5:44:33outright refusal, the cold shut down of
5:44:35all hope, but Nesta only asked, "Why not
5:44:39just kill the King of Hybern before he
5:44:41can act?"
5:44:42Utter silence. Amren said a bit softly,
5:44:46"If you want his killing blow, girl,
5:44:48it's yours."
5:44:50Nesta's gaze drifted toward the open
5:44:52interior doors of the dining room, as if
5:44:54she could see all the way to Elain.
5:44:57"What happened to the human queens?"
5:45:00I blinked. "What do you mean?
5:45:02Were they made immortal? This question
5:45:05went to Azriel. Azriel's siphons
5:45:07smoldered.
5:45:09Reports have been murky and
5:45:10inconsistent. Some say yes, others say
5:45:14no.
5:45:15Nesta examined her wine glass. Cassian
5:45:17braced his forearms on the table. Why?
5:45:21Nesta's eyes shot right to his face. She
5:45:24spoke quietly to me, to all of us, even
5:45:27as she held Cassian's gaze as if he were
5:45:29the only one in the room.
5:45:31By the end of this war, I want them
5:45:34dead. The king, the queen, all of them.
5:45:38Promise me you'll kill them all and I'll
5:45:41help you patch up the wall. I'll train
5:45:43with her. A jerk of her chin to Amren.
5:45:46I'll go to the human city or whatever it
5:45:48is. I'll do it, but only if you promise
5:45:51me that.
5:45:53Fine, I said. And we might need your
5:45:56assistance during the meeting with the
5:45:57High Lords to provide testimony to the
5:45:59other courts and allies of what Hybern
5:46:01is capable of, what was done to you.
5:46:04No.
5:46:06You don't mind fixing the wall or going
5:46:08to the Court of Nightmares, but speaking
5:46:10to people is where you draw your line?
5:46:12Nesta's mouth tightened. No.
5:46:15High Lady or sister, sister or High
5:46:18Lady.
5:46:19People's lives might depend on your
5:46:21account of it. The success of this
5:46:23meeting with the High Lords might depend
5:46:25upon it. She gripped the arms of her
5:46:27chair as if restraining herself. Don't
5:46:30talk down to me. My answer is no. I
5:46:34angled my head. I understand that what
5:46:36happened to you was horrible. You have
5:46:39no idea what it was or was not, none.
5:46:42And I am not going to grovel like one of
5:46:44those children of the blessed, begging
5:46:46High Fae who would have gladly killed me
5:46:48as a mortal to help us. I'm not going to
5:46:51tell them that story, my story.
5:46:55The High Lords might not believe our
5:46:57account, which makes you a valuable
5:46:59witness."
5:47:00Nesta shoved her chair back, chucking
5:47:02her napkin on her plate, gravy soaking
5:47:05through the fine linen.
5:47:06"Then it is not my problem if you're
5:47:08unreliable.
5:47:10I'll help you with the wall, but I am
5:47:12not going to [ __ ] my story around to
5:47:14everyone on your behalf." She shot to
5:47:16her feet, color rising to her ordinarily
5:47:19pale face, and hissed, "And if you even
5:47:22dare suggest to Elain that she do such a
5:47:24thing, I will rip out your throat."
5:47:27Her eyes lifted from mine to sweep over
5:47:30everyone, extending the threat.
5:47:32None of us spoke as she left the dining
5:47:34room and slammed the door shut behind
5:47:36her.
5:47:37I slumped in my chair, resting my head
5:47:40against the back. Something thumped in
5:47:42front of me, a bottle of wine.
5:47:45"It's fine if you drink directly from
5:47:46it." was Amren said.
5:47:51"I'd say Nesta rivals Amren for sheer
5:47:53bloodthirstiness." Rhys mused hours
5:47:56later as he and I walked alone through
5:47:58the streets of Velaris.
5:48:00"The only difference is that Amren
5:48:01actually drinks it."
5:48:03I snorted, shaking my head as we turned
5:48:06onto the broad street beside the Sidra,
5:48:08and meandered along the star-flecked
5:48:10river. So many scars still marred the
5:48:12lovely buildings of Velaris, streets
5:48:15gouged from fallen debris and claws.
5:48:18Most of it had been repaired, but some
5:48:20storefronts had been left boarded up.
5:48:22Some homes along the river no more than
5:48:24mounds of rubble.
5:48:26We'd flown down from the house as soon
5:48:27as we'd finished dinner, well, the wine,
5:48:30I supposed. Amren had taken another
5:48:33bottle with her when she'd disappeared
5:48:34into the house, Azriel frowning after
5:48:37her.
5:48:38Rhysand I hadn't invited anyone else
5:48:40with us. He'd only asked me through the
5:48:42bond, "Walk with me." and I'd merely
5:48:45given him a subtle nod.
5:48:47And here we were.
5:48:49We'd walked for over an hour now, mostly
5:48:51quiet, mostly thinking of the words and
5:48:55information and threats shared today.
5:48:58Neither of us slowed our steps until we
5:49:00reached that little restaurant where we
5:49:02had all dined under the stars one night.
5:49:04Something tight in my chest eased as I
5:49:07beheld the untouched building, the
5:49:09potted citrus plants sighing in the
5:49:11river breeze,
5:49:12and on that breeze, those delectable,
5:49:15rich spices, garlicky meat, simmering
5:49:18tomatoes.
5:49:19I leaned my head back against the rail
5:49:21along the river walkway, watching the
5:49:23restaurant workers serve the packed
5:49:25tables.
5:49:26"Who knows?" I murmured, answering him
5:49:29at last.
5:49:30"Perhaps Nesta will take up the
5:49:31blood-drinking habit, too.
5:49:33I certainly believe her threat to rip
5:49:35out my throat. Maybe she'll enjoy the
5:49:37taste."
5:49:39Rhys chuckled, the sound rumbling into
5:49:41my bones as he took up a spot beside me,
5:49:44his elbows braced on the rail, wings
5:49:46tucked in tight. I breathed in deeply,
5:49:49taking the citrus and sea scent of him
5:49:51into my lungs, my blood. His mouth
5:49:54grazed my neck.
5:49:56"Will you hate me if I say that Nesta is
5:49:59difficult?" I laughed softly.
5:50:02"I'd say this went fairly well, all
5:50:04things considered. She agreed to one
5:50:06thing, at least." I chewed on my lower
5:50:08lip.
5:50:09"I shouldn't have asked her in public. I
5:50:11made a mistake."
5:50:13He remained silent, listening.
5:50:16"With the others," I asked, "how do you
5:50:18find that balance between High Lord and
5:50:21family?"
5:50:22Rhys considered.
5:50:24"It isn't easy. I've made plenty of bad
5:50:26calls over the centuries. So, I hate to
5:50:29tell you that tonight might only be the
5:50:31start of it."
5:50:32I loosed a long sigh. "I should have
5:50:34considered that telling strangers what
5:50:36happened to her in Hybern might
5:50:39might not be something she was
5:50:40comfortable with. My sister has been a
5:50:42private person her entire life, even
5:50:45amongst us."
5:50:47Rhys leaned in to kiss my neck again.
5:50:50"Earlier today at the loft," he said,
5:50:53pulling back to meet my eyes,
5:50:55unflinching, open.
5:50:57"I didn't mean to insult her."
5:51:00"I'm sorry I snapped at you." He lifted
5:51:02a dark brow. "Why in hell would you be?
5:51:05I insulted your sister. You defended
5:51:08her. You had every right to kick my ass
5:51:10for it."
5:51:11"I didn't mean to undermine you."
5:51:14Shadows flickered in his eyes.
5:51:17"Ah." He twisted toward the Sidra, and I
5:51:19followed suit. The water meandered past,
5:51:23its dark surface rippling with golden
5:51:25fay lights from the street lamps and the
5:51:27bright jewels of the rainbow. That was
5:51:29why it was strange between us this
5:51:32afternoon.
5:51:33He cringed and faced me fully. "Mother
5:51:36above, Feyre."
5:51:37My cheeks heated, and I interrupted
5:51:39before he could continue. "I get why,
5:51:42though. A solid unified front is
5:51:44important." I scratched at the smooth
5:51:47wood of the rail with a finger,
5:51:49"especially for us."
5:51:50"Not amongst our family."
5:51:53Warmth spread through me at the words,
5:51:55"our family."
5:51:57He took my hand, interlacing our
5:51:59fingers.
5:52:00"We can make whatever rules we want. You
5:52:02have every right to question me, push
5:52:05me, both in private and in public." A
5:52:08snort. "Of course, if you decide to
5:52:10truly kick my ass, I might request that
5:52:12it's done behind closed doors so I don't
5:52:14have to suffer centuries of teasing, but
5:52:17I won't undermine you in public, and you
5:52:20won't undermine me."
5:52:22He remained quiet, letting me think,
5:52:24speak.
5:52:26"We can question each other through the
5:52:27bond if we're around people other than
5:52:29our friends," I said.
5:52:31"But for now, for these initial years,
5:52:34I'd like to show the world a unified
5:52:36front, that is, if we survive."
5:52:39"We'll survive." Uncompromising will in
5:52:42those words, that face.
5:52:45But I want you to feel comfortable
5:52:46pushing me, calling me out. When have I
5:52:49ever not done that? He smiled, but I
5:52:52added, "I want you to do the same for
5:52:55me."
5:52:56"Deal. But amongst our family, call me
5:52:59on my [ __ ] all you want. I insist,
5:53:02actually."
5:53:03"Why?" "Because it's fun."
5:53:05I nudged him with an elbow.
5:53:07"Because you're my equal," he said. And
5:53:10as much as that means having each
5:53:11other's backs in public, it also means
5:53:14that we grant each other the gift of
5:53:16honesty, of truth.
5:53:18I surveyed the bustling city around us.
5:53:21"Can I give you a bit of truth, then?"
5:53:24He stilled, but said, "Always."
5:53:27I blew out a breath.
5:53:29"I think you should be careful working
5:53:31with Kier. Not for how despicable he is,
5:53:34but because
5:53:35I think you could truly wound more if
5:53:37you don't play it right."
5:53:39He scraped a hand through his hair. "I
5:53:41know. I know."
5:53:44"Is it worth it? Whatever troops he can
5:53:46offer, if it means hurting her?"
5:53:49"We've been working with Kier for
5:53:50centuries. She should be used to it by
5:53:52now. And yes, his troops are worth it.
5:53:55The Darkbringers are well-trained,
5:53:57powerful, and have been idle too long."
5:54:00I considered.
5:54:02"The last time we went to the Court of
5:54:03Nightmares, I played your whore."
5:54:06He winced at the word.
5:54:08"But I am now your high lady," I went
5:54:11on, stroking a finger over the back of
5:54:13his hand. He tracked the movement. My
5:54:16voice dropped lower.
5:54:18"To get Kier to agree to aid us,
5:54:21any tips on what mask I should wear to
5:54:23the Hewn City?"
5:54:25"It's for you to decide," he said, still
5:54:27watching my finger trace idle circles on
5:54:30his skin.
5:54:31You've seen how I am there, how we are.
5:54:34It is for you to decide how to play into
5:54:36that.
5:54:37I suppose I'd better decide soon, not
5:54:40just for this, but the meeting with the
5:54:42other High Lords in 2 weeks.
5:54:44Reese slid a sidelong glance to me.
5:54:47Every court is invited.
5:54:50I doubt he'll come, given that he is
5:54:52Hybern's ally and knows we'd kill him.
5:54:54The river breeze stirred his blue-black
5:54:56hair.
5:54:58The meeting will occur with a binding
5:54:59spell that forces us all into ceasefire.
5:55:02If someone breaks in while the meeting
5:55:04occurs, the magic will demand a steep
5:55:06cost, probably their life. Tamlin
5:55:09wouldn't be stupid enough to attack, nor
5:55:12us him.
5:55:14Why invite him at all?
5:55:16Excluding him will only give him more
5:55:17ammunition against us, believe me. I
5:55:20have little desire to see him or Beron,
5:55:23who perhaps is higher on my kill list
5:55:25than Tamlin right now.
5:55:28Tarquin will be there, and we are pretty
5:55:30high on his kill list. Even with the
5:55:33blood rubies, he wouldn't be stupid
5:55:35enough to attack during the meeting.
5:55:37Reese sighed through his nose.
5:55:39How many allies can we count on? Beyond
5:55:42Keir in the Hewn City, I mean.
5:55:44I glanced down the river walkway. The
5:55:47diners and revelers were too busy
5:55:48enjoying themselves to even note our
5:55:50presence, even with Reese's recognizable
5:55:53wings. Still, perhaps not the best place
5:55:56for this conversation.
5:55:58"I'm not sure." Reese admitted. "Helion
5:56:01and his Day Court, probably. Kallias,
5:56:04maybe. Things have been strained with
5:56:07the Winter Court since under the
5:56:08mountain."
5:56:09I assume Azriel is going to be finding
5:56:12out more?
5:56:13He's already on the hunt. I nodded.
5:56:16Amren claimed she and Nesta needed help
5:56:18researching ways to repair the wall. I
5:56:21gestured to the city.
5:56:23Point me toward the best library to find
5:56:25that sort of thing.
5:56:26Reese's brows lifted. Right now? Your
5:56:30her ethic puts mine to shame. I hissed.
5:56:33Tomorrow, smart-ass. He chuckled, wings
5:56:36flaring and tucking in tight. Wings.
5:56:39Wings he'd allowed Lucien to see.
5:56:43You trust Lucien?
5:56:45Rhys angled his head at the not-quite
5:56:46question.
5:56:48I trust in the fact that we currently
5:56:50have possession of the one thing he
5:56:52wants above all else. And as long as
5:56:54that remains, he'll try to stay on our
5:56:56good side. But if that changes,
5:57:00his talent was in the Spring Court.
5:57:02There was a reason he had that fox mask,
5:57:05you know. His mouth tugged to the side.
5:57:08If he got Elain away, back to spring or
5:57:11wherever, do you believe deep down that
5:57:13he wouldn't sell what he knows, either
5:57:16for gain or to ensure she stays safe?
5:57:19You let him hear everything tonight,
5:57:21though.
5:57:22None of it is information that would let
5:57:23Hybern wreck us. The king likely already
5:57:26knows that we'll go for Keir's alliance,
5:57:28that we'll try to find a way to stop him
5:57:30from bringing down the wall.
5:57:32He wasn't subtle with Dagdan and
5:57:34Brannagh's searching. And he'll expect
5:57:36us to try to band the High Lords
5:57:38together, which is why the meeting
5:57:40location will not be decided until
5:57:42later.
5:57:43Will I tell Lucien then? Bring him
5:57:45along.
5:57:46I considered his question. Did I trust
5:57:49Lucien?
5:57:51I don't know either, I admitted and
5:57:53sighed. I don't like that Elain is a
5:57:56pawn in this.
5:57:57I know. It's never easy.
5:58:00He dealt with such things for centuries.
5:58:03I want to wait, see what Lucien does
5:58:05over the next two weeks, how he acts
5:58:08with us and Elain, what Azriel thinks of
5:58:11him.
5:58:11I frowned.
5:58:13He's not a bad person. He's not evil. He
5:58:17certainly isn't. I just I met his calm,
5:58:20steady stare.
5:58:22There is risk in trusting him without
5:58:24question.
5:58:26Did he discuss what he feels regarding
5:58:28Tamlin?
5:58:29No. I didn't want to push him on that.
5:58:32He was remorseful about what happened
5:58:34with me and Hybern and Elain.
5:58:37Would he have felt that way without
5:58:38Elain in the mix? I don't know.
5:58:41Maybe.
5:58:42I don't think he would have left though.
5:58:44Rhys brushed the hair from my face. It's
5:58:47all part of the game, Feyre darling. Who
5:58:50to trust, when to trust them, what
5:58:52information to barter.
5:58:55Do you enjoy it? Sometimes. Right now, I
5:58:58don't. Not when the risks are this high.
5:59:01His fingers grazed my brow. When I have
5:59:04so much to lose.
5:59:06I laid my palm on his chest, right over
5:59:08those Illyrian tattoos beneath his
5:59:10clothes, right over his heart. Felt the
5:59:13sturdy beat echoing into my skin and
5:59:15bones.
5:59:16I forgot the city around us as he met my
5:59:18eyes, lips hovering over my skin, and
5:59:21murmured,
5:59:22We will keep planning for the future.
5:59:25War or no war, I will keep planning for
5:59:28our future.
5:59:29My throat burned, and I nodded.
5:59:32We deserve to be happy, he said, his
5:59:35eyes sparkling enough to tell me that he
5:59:37recalled the words I'd given him on the
5:59:39townhouse roof after the attack.
5:59:41And I will fight with everything I have
5:59:44to ensure it. We will fight, I said
5:59:47hoarsely. Not just you. Not anymore.
5:59:51Too much. He had given too much already,
5:59:54and still seemed to think it was not
5:59:56enough.
5:59:57But Rhys only peered over his broad
5:59:59shoulder to the cheerful restaurant
6:00:01behind us.
6:00:03That first night we all came here, he
6:00:05said, and I followed his gaze, watching
6:00:08the workers set the tables with loving
6:00:10precision.
6:00:11When you told Seraphina that you felt
6:00:12awake while eating her food. He shook
6:00:15his head.
6:00:16It was the first time you had looked
6:00:19peaceful. Like you were indeed awake,
6:00:22alive again. I was so relieved. I
6:00:25thought I'd puke right onto the table.
6:00:27I recalled the long, strange look he'd
6:00:29given me when I'd finally spoken.
6:00:32Then the long walk we'd taken home, when
6:00:34we'd heard that music he'd sent to my
6:00:36cell under the mountain.
6:00:38I pushed off the rail and tugged him
6:00:40toward the bridge that spanned the
6:00:41Sidra, the bridge to take us home.
6:00:44Let the debate over who'd give the most
6:00:46in this war rest for now.
6:00:49Walk with me through the rainbow,
6:00:51the glittering, colorful jewel of the
6:00:53city, the beating heart that housed the
6:00:55artist's quarter, vibrant and thrumming
6:00:58at this hour of the night.
6:01:00I linked arms with him before saying,
6:01:03"You and this city helped wake me up,
6:01:05helped bring me back to life."
6:01:08His eyes flickered as I smiled up at
6:01:10him.
6:01:11"I will fight with everything I have to,
6:01:13Rhys.
6:01:14Everything."
6:01:16He only kissed the top of my head,
6:01:18tugging me closer as we crossed the
6:01:20Sidra under the starry sky.
6:01:26Chapter 19
6:01:29It was a good thing I'd insisted on
6:01:31meeting Cassian at 8:00, because even
6:01:33though I awoke at dawn, one look at
6:01:35Rhysand's sleeping face had me deciding
6:01:37to spend the morning slowly, sweetly
6:01:40waking him up.
6:01:42I was still flushed by the time Rhys
6:01:43dropped me at the sparring ring atop the
6:01:45House of Wind, the space surrounded by a
6:01:48wall of red rock, the top open to the
6:01:50elements. He promised to meet me after
6:01:53lunch to show me the library for my
6:01:55researching, then gave me a roguish wink
6:01:57and kiss on the cheek before he shot
6:01:59back into the sky with a powerful flap
6:02:01of his wings.
6:02:03Leaning against the wall beside the
6:02:05weapons rack, Cassian only said,
6:02:08"I hope you didn't exert yourself too
6:02:10much already, because this is really
6:02:12going to hurt." I rolled my eyes, even
6:02:15as I tried to shut out the image of
6:02:17Rhysand laying me on my stomach, then
6:02:19kissing his way down my spine, lower.
6:02:23Tried to shut out the feeling of his
6:02:24strong hands gripping my hips and
6:02:27lifting them up, up, until he lay
6:02:29beneath them and feasted on me, until I
6:02:32was quietly begging him, and he rose
6:02:34behind me, and I had to bite my pillow
6:02:36to keep from waking the whole house with
6:02:38my moaning.
6:02:40Rhysand in the morning was
6:02:43I didn't have words for what it was when
6:02:44he was unhurried lazy and wicked. When
6:02:48his hair was still mussed with sleep and
6:02:50his eyes got that glazed purely male
6:02:52gleam in them.
6:02:54They'd still had that lazy satisfied
6:02:56glint a moment ago, and his mockingly
6:02:58chased kiss on my cheek had sent a red
6:03:01hot line through me.
6:03:03Later, I'd torture him later.
6:03:06For now, I strode to where Cassian
6:03:08stood, rotating my shoulders.
6:03:11Two Illyrian males making me sweat in
6:03:13one morning. What's a female to do?
6:03:16Cassian barked a laugh. At least you
6:03:18showed up with some spirit. I grinned,
6:03:21bracing my hands on my hips as I
6:03:23surveyed the weapons rack. Which one?
6:03:26None. He jerked his chin toward the ring
6:03:29etched in white chalk behind us.
6:03:31It's been a while since we trained.
6:03:34We're spending today going over the
6:03:35basics.
6:03:36The words were laced with enough
6:03:38tightness that I said, "It hasn't been
6:03:40that long."
6:03:42It's been a month and a half.
6:03:44I studied him. The wings tucked in
6:03:46tight, the shoulder-length dark hair.
6:03:48What's wrong? Nothing. He stalked past
6:03:51me to the ring.
6:03:53Is it Nesta?
6:03:54Not everything in my life is about your
6:03:56sister, you know.
6:03:58I kept my mouth shut on that front. Is
6:04:00it something with the Court of
6:04:02Nightmares visit tomorrow?
6:04:04Cassian shucked off his shirt, revealing
6:04:06rippling muscles covered in beautiful
6:04:08intricate tattoos, Illyrian markings for
6:04:11luck and glory. It's nothing. Get into
6:04:14position.
6:04:15I obeyed even as I eyed him carefully.
6:04:19You're angry.
6:04:21He refused to speak until I started my
6:04:23circuit of warm-ups, various lunges,
6:04:26kicks, and stretches designed to loosen
6:04:28my muscles. And only when we'd begun
6:04:31sparring, his hands wrapped against my
6:04:33onslaught of punching, did he say,
6:04:36"You and Rhys hid the truth from us, and
6:04:38we went into Hybern blind about it."
6:04:41About what? "That you're High Lady."
6:04:44I jabbed at his raised hands in a
6:04:46one-two combination, breathing hard.
6:04:49What difference would it have made? "It
6:04:51would have changed everything. None of
6:04:53it would have gone down like that."
6:04:55Perhaps that's why Rhys decided to keep
6:04:57it a secret. "Hybern was a disaster."
6:05:01I halted my punching. You knew I was his
6:05:04mate when we went. I don't see how being
6:05:06High Lady alters anything. "It does." I
6:05:09put my hands on my hips, ignoring his
6:05:12motion to continue. Why?
6:05:14Cassian dragged a hand through his hair.
6:05:17"Because
6:05:18because as his mate, you were still his
6:05:21to protect. Oh, don't get that look.
6:05:23He's yours to protect, too. I would have
6:05:26laid down my life for you as his mate
6:05:28and as your friend, but you were still
6:05:31his."
6:05:32And as High Lady?
6:05:34Cassian loosed a rough breath.
6:05:37"As High Lady, you are mine and Azriel's
6:05:40and Mor's and Amren's. You belong to all
6:05:43of us and we belong to you. We would not
6:05:46have
6:05:47put you in so much danger.
6:05:49Maybe that's why Rhys wanted to keep it
6:05:51a secret. It would have changed your
6:05:53focus.
6:05:54This is between you and me, and trust
6:05:57me, Rhys and I had words about this." I
6:06:01lifted a brow.
6:06:03You're mad at me?
6:06:04He shook his head, eyes shuttering.
6:06:07Cassian.
6:06:08He just held up his hands in a silent
6:06:10order to continue.
6:06:12I sighed and began again.
6:06:14It was only after I'd gotten through 15
6:06:16repetitions and was panting heavily that
6:06:19Cassian said,
6:06:20"You didn't think you were essential.
6:06:23You saved our asses, yes, but
6:06:26you didn't think you were essential
6:06:27here."
6:06:28One, two. One, two. One, two. "I'm not."
6:06:32He opened his mouth, but I charged
6:06:34ahead, speaking around my gasps for
6:06:36breath. "You all have a
6:06:39duty. You're all vital. Yes, I have my
6:06:42own abilities, but you and Azriel were
6:06:45hurt. My sisters were
6:06:48You know what happened to them.
6:06:50I did what I could to get us out. I'd
6:06:52rather it was me than any of you. I
6:06:54couldn't have lived with the
6:06:55alternative."
6:06:57His upraised hands were unfaltering as I
6:06:59pummeled them.
6:07:00"Anything could have happened to you at
6:07:02the Spring Court."
6:07:03I stopped again.
6:07:05"If Rhys isn't grilling me with the
6:07:06overprotective [ __ ] then I don't
6:07:08see why you don't for one moment think
6:07:11that Rhys wasn't beside himself with
6:07:13worry.
6:07:14Oh, he seems collected enough, Feyre,
6:07:17but I know him. And every moment you
6:07:19were gone, he was in a panic. Yes, he
6:07:22knew we knew you could handle yourself,
6:07:25but it doesn't stop us from worrying." I
6:07:28shook out my sore hands, then rubbed my
6:07:30already aching arms.
6:07:32"You were mad at him, too."
6:07:34"If I hadn't been healing, I would have
6:07:36kicked his ass from one end of Velaris
6:07:38to the other."
6:07:40I didn't reply.
6:07:42"We were all terrified for you."
6:07:45"I managed just fine." "Of course you
6:07:47did. We knew you would, but
6:07:50Cassian crossed his arms.
6:07:52Rhys pulled the same [ __ ] 50 years ago
6:07:55when he went to that damned party
6:07:57Amarantha threw."
6:07:59"Oh."
6:08:00"Oh."
6:08:02"I'll never forget it, you know, he
6:08:04said, blowing out a breath.
6:08:06The moment when he spoke to us all, mind
6:08:08to mind, when I realized what was
6:08:10happening and that
6:08:12he'd saved us. Trapped us here and tied
6:08:15our hands, but
6:08:17he scratched at his temple.
6:08:19It went quiet in my head.
6:08:22In a way it hadn't been before.
6:08:24Not since
6:08:25Cassian squinted at the cloudless sky.
6:08:29Even with utter hell unleashing here,
6:08:31across our territory, I just went
6:08:34quiet.
6:08:35He tapped the side of his head with a
6:08:36finger and frowned.
6:08:39After Hybern, the healer kept me asleep
6:08:41while she worked on my wings.
6:08:43So when I woke up 2 weeks later, that's
6:08:46when I heard. And when Mor told me what
6:08:48happened to you,
6:08:50it went quiet again.
6:08:52I swallowed against the constriction of
6:08:54my throat.
6:08:56You found me when I needed you most,
6:08:58Cassian. Pleased to be of service. He
6:09:01gave me a grim smile.
6:09:03You can rely on us, you know, both of
6:09:06you. He's inclined to do everything
6:09:08himself, to give everything of himself.
6:09:11He can't stand to let anyone else offer
6:09:13up anything.
6:09:15That smile faded.
6:09:17Neither can you.
6:09:19And you can?
6:09:20It's not easy, but yes.
6:09:23I'm general of his armies. Part of that
6:09:25includes knowing how to delegate.
6:09:28I've been with Rhys for over 500 years,
6:09:31and he still tries to do everything
6:09:32himself. Still thinks it's not enough.
6:09:36I knew that too well.
6:09:38And the thought of Rhys in this war
6:09:40trying to take on all that faced us,
6:09:43nausea churned in my gut.
6:09:45He gives orders all the time.
6:09:48Yes, and he's good at knowing what we
6:09:49excel at. But when it comes down to it,
6:09:53Cassian adjusted the wrappings on his
6:09:54hands. If the High Lords in Kier don't
6:09:57step up, he'll still face Hybern and
6:10:00will take the brunt of it so we don't
6:10:02have to.
6:10:03An unshakeable, queasy sort of tightness
6:10:05pushed in on me.
6:10:07Rhys would survive. He wouldn't dare
6:10:09sacrifice everything to make sure we
6:10:12Rhys would.
6:10:14He had with Amarantha.
6:10:15And he'd do it again without hesitation.
6:10:18I shut it out, shoved it down, focused
6:10:21on my breathing.
6:10:23Something drew Cassian's attention
6:10:25behind me. And even as his body remained
6:10:27casual, a predatory gleam flickered in
6:10:30his eyes.
6:10:31I didn't need to turn to know who was
6:10:33standing there.
6:10:35"Care to join?" Cassian purred. Nesta
6:10:38said, "It doesn't look like you're
6:10:39exercising anything other than your
6:10:41mouths."
6:10:43I looked over my shoulder.
6:10:45My sister was in a dress of pale blue
6:10:47that turned her skin golden. Her hair
6:10:49swept up, her back a stiff column. I
6:10:52scrambled to say something, to
6:10:54apologize, but not in front of him. She
6:10:58wouldn't want this conversation in front
6:10:59of Cassian.
6:11:01Cassian extended a wrapped hand, his
6:11:03fingers curling in a come hither motion.
6:11:06"Scared?"
6:11:08I wisely kept my mouth shut as Nesta
6:11:10stepped from the open doorway into the
6:11:12blinding light of the courtyard. "Why
6:11:14should I be scared of an oversized bat
6:11:16who likes to throw temper tantrums?"
6:11:19I joked, and Cassian shot me a warning
6:11:21glare, daring me to laugh.
6:11:24But I felt for that bond in my mind,
6:11:26lowering my mental shields enough to say
6:11:28to Rhysand, wherever he was in the city,
6:11:31"Please come spare me from Cassian and
6:11:33Nesta's bickering."
6:11:35A heartbeat later, Rhys crooned,
6:11:37"Regretting becoming High Lady?"
6:11:40I savored that voice, that humor, but I
6:11:43shoved that simmering panic down again
6:11:45as I countered, "Is this part of my
6:11:47duties?"
6:11:49A sensual, dark laugh.
6:11:51"Why do you think I was so desperate for
6:11:52a partner? I've had almost five
6:11:55centuries to deal with this alone. It's
6:11:57only fair you have to endure it now.
6:12:00Cassian was saying to Nesta, "Seems like
6:12:03you're a little on edge, Nesta. And you
6:12:05left so abruptly last night. Any way I
6:12:08can help ease that tension?"
6:12:10"Please," I begged Rhys. "What will you
6:12:13give me?"
6:12:14I wasn't sure if I could hiss down the
6:12:16bond between us, but from the chuckle
6:12:18that echoed into my mind a heartbeat
6:12:20later, I knew the feeling had been
6:12:22conveyed.
6:12:24"I'm in a meeting with the governors of
6:12:25the palaces. They might be a little
6:12:27pissy if I vanish." I tried not to sigh.
6:12:31Nesta picked at her nails. "Amren is
6:12:34coming to instruct me in a few." Shadow
6:12:37rippled across the courtyard, cutting
6:12:39her off, and it wasn't Rhysand who
6:12:41landed between us, but
6:12:43"I sent another pretty face for you to
6:12:45admire," Rhys said. "Not as beautiful as
6:12:48mine, of course, but a close second."
6:12:51As the shadows wreathing him cleared,
6:12:54Azriel sized up Nesta and Cassian, then
6:12:56threw a vaguely sympathetic look in my
6:12:58direction. "I need to start our lesson
6:13:01early."
6:13:02A piss-poor lie, but I said, "Right, no
6:13:05problem at all." Cassian glowered at me,
6:13:08then Azriel. We both ignored him as I
6:13:10strode to the Shadow Singer, unwrapping
6:13:13my hands as I went. "Thank you," I said
6:13:16down the bond. "You can make it up to me
6:13:18tonight." I tried not to blush at the
6:13:21image Rhys sent into my head, detailing
6:13:23precisely how I'd repay him, and slammed
6:13:26down my mental shields. On the other
6:13:29side of them, I could have sworn
6:13:30talon-tipped fingers trailed down the
6:13:32black adamant in a sensual, silent
6:13:35promise. I swallowed hard.
6:13:38Azriel's wings spread, dark reds and
6:13:40golds shining through in the bright sun,
6:13:43and he opened his arms to me. "The pine
6:13:45forest will be good. The one by the
6:13:47lake. Why?
6:13:50Because water is better to fall into
6:13:52than hard rock, Cassian replied,
6:13:54crossing his arms.
6:13:56My stomach clenched, but I let Azriel
6:13:59scoop me up, his scent of night-chilled
6:14:01mist and cedar wrapping around me as he
6:14:03flapped his wings once, stirring the
6:14:05dirt of the courtyard. I caught
6:14:08Cassian's narrowed gaze and grinned
6:14:10widely. "Good luck," I said, and Azriel,
6:14:14Cauldron-blessed, shot into the
6:14:16cloudless sky.
6:14:17Neither of us missed Cassian's barked
6:14:19filthy curse, though we didn't deign to
6:14:22comment. Cassian was a general, the
6:14:25general of the Night Court. Surely Nesta
6:14:28wasn't anything he couldn't handle.
6:14:33"I dropped Amren off at the house on my
6:14:35way in," Azriel told me as we landed at
6:14:38the shore of a turquoise mountain lake
6:14:40flanked by pines and granite. "I told
6:14:42her to get to the training ring
6:14:44immediately." A half-smile. "After a few
6:14:47minutes, that is." I snorted and
6:14:50stretched my arms. Poor Cassian. Azriel
6:14:53gave a huff of amusement. "Indeed."
6:14:57I shifted on my feet, small gray rocks
6:14:59along the shore skittering beneath my
6:15:01boots. So? Azriel's black hair seemed to
6:15:05gobble up the blinding sunlight.
6:15:07"In order to fly," he said dryly,
6:15:10"you'll need wings."
6:15:12Right. My face heated. I rolled and
6:15:15cracked my wrists.
6:15:17"It's been a while since I summoned
6:15:19them." His piercing stare didn't stray
6:15:21from my face, my posture as immovable
6:15:25and steady as the granite this lake had
6:15:26been carved into. I might as well have
6:15:29been a flitting butterfly by comparison.
6:15:32"Do you need me to turn around?" He
6:15:34lifted a dark brow in emphasis. I
6:15:36cringed. "No, but it might take me a few
6:15:40tries."
6:15:41"We started our lesson early. We've got
6:15:43plenty of time.
6:15:45I appreciate you making the effort to
6:15:47pretend that it wasn't because I was
6:15:48desperate to avoid Cassian and Nesta's
6:15:50early morning bickering.
6:15:53I'd never let my high lady suffer
6:15:54through that. He said it completely
6:15:57stone-faced. I chuckled, rubbing at a
6:15:59sore spot on my shoulder.
6:16:02Are you ready to meet with Lucien this
6:16:04afternoon?
6:16:06Azriel angled his head. Should I be
6:16:08preparing for it?
6:16:10No, I just I shrugged.
6:16:13When do you leave to gather information
6:16:15on the high lords? After I talk to him.
6:16:18His eyes were shining, lit with
6:16:20amusement, as if he knew I was buying
6:16:22time. I blew out a breath.
6:16:25Right. Here we go.
6:16:27Touching that part of me, the part
6:16:29Tamlin had given me, some vital piece of
6:16:32my heart recoiled, even as something
6:16:34sharp and vicious in my gut preened at
6:16:36what I'd taken, all that I'd taken.
6:16:39I shoved out the thoughts, focusing on
6:16:41those Illyrian wings. I'd summoned them
6:16:44that day in the steps from pure memory
6:16:46and fear. Creating them now,
6:16:49I let my mind slip into my recollections
6:16:51of Rhys's wings, how they felt and moved
6:16:55and weighed.
6:16:56"The frame needs to be a bit thicker."
6:16:59Azriel offered, as a weight began to
6:17:01drag at my back. "Strengthen the muscles
6:17:04leading to it." I obeyed, my magic
6:17:07listening in turn.
6:17:08He provided more feedback, where to add
6:17:11and where to ease up, where to smooth
6:17:13and where to toughen.
6:17:14I was rasping for breath, sweat sliding
6:17:17down my spine by the time he said,
6:17:19"Good." He cleared his throat.
6:17:22"I know you're not Illyrian, but amongst
6:17:25their kind, it is considered
6:17:27inappropriate to touch someone's wings
6:17:30without permission, especially females."
6:17:33Their kind, not his.
6:17:36It took me a moment to realize what he
6:17:38was asking.
6:17:39Oh. Oh, go ahead.
6:17:42I need to ascertain if they feel right.
6:17:45Right. I put my back to him, my muscles
6:17:48groaning as they worked to spread the
6:17:49wings. Everything from my neck to my
6:17:53shoulders to my ribs to my spine to my
6:17:55ass seemed to now control them and was
6:17:58barking in protest at the weight and
6:18:00movement.
6:18:01I'd only had them for a few seconds with
6:18:03Lucien in the steps. I hadn't realized
6:18:06how heavy they were, how complex the
6:18:08muscles.
6:18:10Azriel's hands, for all their scarring,
6:18:12were feather-light as he grasped and
6:18:14touched certain areas, patting and
6:18:16tapping others.
6:18:18I gritted my teeth, the sensation like
6:18:21like having the arch of my foot tickled
6:18:23and poked. But he made quick work of it
6:18:25and I rolled my shoulders again as he
6:18:27stepped around me to murmur,
6:18:29"It's amazing.
6:18:31They're the same as mine."
6:18:34I think the magic did most of the work.
6:18:36A shake of the head. "You're an artist.
6:18:39It was your attention to detail."
6:18:41I blushed a bit at the compliment and
6:18:43braced my hands on my hips.
6:18:46Well, do we jump into the skies? "First
6:18:49lesson, don't let them drag on the
6:18:51ground." I blinked. My wings were indeed
6:18:54resting on the rocks.
6:18:56Why?
6:18:57"Illyrians think it's lazy, a sign of
6:18:59weakness. And from a practical
6:19:01standpoint, the ground is full of things
6:19:03that could hurt your wings, splinters,
6:19:06shards of rock. They can not only get
6:19:08stuck and lead to infection, but also
6:19:11impact the way the wing catches the
6:19:13wind. So, keep them off the ground."
6:19:16Knife-sharp pain rippled down my back as
6:19:18I tried to lift them. I managed getting
6:19:20the left upright. The right just drooped
6:19:23like a loose sail.
6:19:25"You need to strengthen your back
6:19:26muscles and your thighs and your arms
6:19:29and core.
6:19:31So, everything then.
6:19:33Again, that dry, quiet smile. Why do you
6:19:36think Illyrians are so fit?
6:19:38Why did no one warn me about this cocky
6:19:40side of yours?
6:19:42Azriel's mouth twitched upward. Both
6:19:44wings up. A quiet, but unyielding
6:19:47demand.
6:19:48I winced, contorting my body this way
6:19:51and that as I fought to get the right
6:19:52one to rise. No luck.
6:19:55Try spreading them, then tucking in if
6:19:57you can't lift up like that.
6:20:00I obeyed and hissed at the sharp pain
6:20:02along every muscle in my back as I
6:20:04flared the wings. Even the slightest
6:20:06breeze off the lake tickled and tugged,
6:20:09and I braced my feet apart on the rocky
6:20:11shore, seeking some semblance of
6:20:13balance.
6:20:14Now, fold inward. I did, snapping them
6:20:17shut. The movement so fast that I
6:20:19toppled forward. Azriel caught me before
6:20:22I could eat stone, gripping me tightly
6:20:24under the shoulder and hauling me up.
6:20:27Building your core muscles will also
6:20:29help with the balance.
6:20:31So, back to Cassian then.
6:20:33A nod. Tomorrow. Today, focus on lifting
6:20:37and folding, spreading and lifting.
6:20:40Azriel's wings gleamed with red and gold
6:20:43as the sun gilded them.
6:20:45Like this.
6:20:46He demonstrated, flaring his wings wide,
6:20:49tucking them in, flaring, angling,
6:20:52tucking them in. Over and over.
6:20:55Sighing, I followed his movements, my
6:20:58back throbbing and aching.
6:21:00Perhaps flying lessons were a waste of
6:21:02time.
6:21:07Chapter 20.
6:21:10I've never been to a library before, I
6:21:13admitted to Rhys after lunch as we
6:21:15strode down level after level beneath
6:21:17the House of Wind, my words echoing off
6:21:20the carved red stone. I winced with
6:21:22every step, rubbing at my back.
6:21:25Azriel had given me a tonic that would
6:21:27help with the soreness, but I knew that
6:21:29by tonight I'd be whimpering if hours of
6:21:32researching any way to patch up those
6:21:34holes in the wall didn't make me start
6:21:36first.
6:21:37"I mean," I clarified, "not counting the
6:21:40private libraries here and at the Spring
6:21:42Court, and my family had one as well,
6:21:44but not
6:21:46not a real one."
6:21:47Rhys glanced sidelong at me.
6:21:50"I've heard that the humans have free
6:21:51libraries on the continent, open to
6:21:54anyone."
6:21:55I wasn't sure if it was a question or
6:21:57not, but I nodded.
6:21:59"In one of the territories, they allow
6:22:01anyone in, regardless of their station
6:22:03or bloodline." I considered his words.
6:22:06Did
6:22:07were there libraries before the war?
6:22:10Of course there had been, but what I
6:22:12meant Yes, great libraries full of
6:22:15cranky scholars who could find you tomes
6:22:18dating back thousands of years, but
6:22:20humans were not allowed inside unless
6:22:23you were someone's slave on an errand,
6:22:25and even then you were closely watched.
6:22:27"Why?"
6:22:29"Because the books were full of magic
6:22:30and things they wanted to keep humans
6:22:32from knowing."
6:22:34Rhys slid his hands into his pockets,
6:22:36leading me down a corridor lit only by
6:22:38bowls of faelight upraised in the hands
6:22:40of beautiful female statues, their forms
6:22:43high fae and fairy alike.
6:22:46"The scholars and librarians refused to
6:22:48keep slaves of their own, some for
6:22:50personal reasons, but mainly because
6:22:53they didn't want them accessing the
6:22:54books and archives."
6:22:56Rhys gestured down another curving
6:22:58stairwell. We must have been far beneath
6:23:00the mountain, the air dry and cool and
6:23:03heavy, as if it had been trapped inside
6:23:06for ages.
6:23:08"What happened to the libraries once the
6:23:09wall was built?"
6:23:11Rhys tucked in his wings as the stairs
6:23:13became tighter, the ceiling dropping.
6:23:16"Most scholars had enough time to
6:23:18evacuate, and we were able to winnow the
6:23:20books out, but if they didn't have the
6:23:23time or the brute power,
6:23:25a muscle ticked in his jaw,
6:23:27they burned the libraries rather than
6:23:30let the humans access their precious
6:23:32information.
6:23:34A chill snaked down my spine.
6:23:36They'd rather have lost that information
6:23:38forever?
6:23:39He nodded, the dim light gilding his
6:23:42blue-black hair.
6:23:44Prejudices aside, the fear was that the
6:23:46humans would find dangerous spells and
6:23:49use them on us.
6:23:51But, we I mean, they don't have magic.
6:23:54Humans don't have magic. Some do.
6:23:57Usually, the ones who can claim distant
6:23:59fae ancestry.
6:24:01But, some of those spells don't require
6:24:03magic from the wielder, only the right
6:24:05words or use of ingredients.
6:24:08His words snagged on something in my
6:24:10mind.
6:24:11Could I mean, obviously they did, but
6:24:14humans and fae once interbred. What
6:24:17happened to the offspring? If you were
6:24:19half fae, half human, where did you go
6:24:22once the wall went up?
6:24:24Rhys stepped into a hall at the foot of
6:24:26the stairs, revealing a wide passageway
6:24:28of carved red stone and a sealed set of
6:24:30obsidian doors, veins of silver running
6:24:33throughout. Beautiful. Terrifying. Like
6:24:37some great beast was kept behind them.
6:24:40It did not go well for the half-breeds,
6:24:43he said after a moment.
6:24:44Many were offspring of unwanted unions.
6:24:47Most usually chose to stay with their
6:24:49human mothers, their human families.
6:24:52But, once the wall went up, amongst
6:24:54humans, they were a
6:24:56reminder of what had been done, of the
6:24:59enemies lurking above the wall.
6:25:02At best, they were outcasts and pariahs.
6:25:04Their children, if they bore the
6:25:06physical traits as well,
6:25:08at worst,
6:25:10humans were angry in those initial
6:25:11years, and that first generation
6:25:14afterward,
6:25:15they wanted someone to pay for the
6:25:17slavery, for the crimes against them,
6:25:20even if the half-breed had done nothing
6:25:21wrong.
6:25:23It did not end well.
6:25:25He approached the doors, which opened on
6:25:27a phantom wind, as if the mountain
6:25:29itself lived to serve him.
6:25:32And the ones above the wall?
6:25:34They were deemed even lower than lesser
6:25:36fairies. Either they were unwanted
6:25:38everywhere they went, or
6:25:41many found work on the streets, selling
6:25:43themselves.
6:25:45Here in Velaris, my words were a bare
6:25:47brush of air.
6:25:49"My father was still High Lord then,"
6:25:51Rhys said, his back stiffening.
6:25:54"We had not allowed any humans, slave or
6:25:56free, into our territory in centuries.
6:26:00He did not allow them in, either to
6:26:02[ __ ] or to find sanctuary.
6:26:05And once you were High Lord?"
6:26:07Rhys halted before the gloom that spread
6:26:09beyond us.
6:26:11"By then, it was too late for most of
6:26:13them.
6:26:14It is hard to
6:26:16offer refuge to someone without being
6:26:18able to explain where we were offering
6:26:20them a safe place, to get the word out
6:26:23about it while maintaining our illusion
6:26:24of ruthless cruelty."
6:26:26The starlight guttered in his eyes.
6:26:29"Over the years, we encountered a few.
6:26:32Some were able to make it here. Some
6:26:34were
6:26:35beyond our help."
6:26:37Something moved in the darkness beyond
6:26:39the doors, but I kept my focus on his
6:26:42face, on his tensed shoulders.
6:26:45"If the wall comes down, will"
6:26:48I couldn't finish the words.
6:26:50Rhys slid his fingers through mine,
6:26:52interlacing our hands. "Yes. If there
6:26:55are those, human or faerie, who need a
6:26:57safe place, this city will be open to
6:27:00them.
6:27:01Velaris has been closed off for so long,
6:27:04too long, perhaps.
6:27:06Adding new people from different places,
6:27:08different histories and cultures,
6:27:11I do not see how that could be a bad
6:27:12thing. The transition might be more
6:27:14complex than we anticipate, but yes.
6:27:18The gates to this city will be open for
6:27:20those who need its protection, to any
6:27:22who can make it here.
6:27:24I squeezed his hand, savoring the
6:27:26hard-earned calluses on it. No, I would
6:27:30not let him bear the burden of this war,
6:27:32its cost, alone.
6:27:34Reese glanced to the open doors, to the
6:27:37hooded and cloaked figure patiently
6:27:38waiting in the shadows beyond them.
6:27:41Every aching sinew and bone locked up as
6:27:43I took in the pale robes, the hood
6:27:46crowned with a limpid blue stone, the
6:27:48panel that could be lowered over the
6:27:50eyes.
6:27:51Priestess.
6:27:53This is Clotho, Reese said calmly,
6:27:56releasing my hand to guide me toward the
6:27:57awaiting female.
6:27:59The weight of his hand on my lower back
6:28:01told me enough about how much he
6:28:03realized the sight of her would jar me.
6:28:05She's one of the dozens of priestesses
6:28:07who work here.
6:28:08Clotho lowered her head in a bow, but
6:28:11said nothing.
6:28:12I
6:28:14I didn't know that the priestesses left
6:28:15their temples.
6:28:17A library is a temple of sorts, Reese
6:28:19said with a wry smile, but the
6:28:21priestesses here
6:28:23As we entered the library proper, golden
6:28:25lights flickered to life, as if Clotho
6:28:28had been in utter darkness until we'd
6:28:29entered.
6:28:31They are special, unique.
6:28:33She angled her head in what might have
6:28:35been amusement. Her face remained in
6:28:38shadow, her slim body concealed in those
6:28:40pale heavy robes. Silence, and yet life
6:28:44danced around her. Reese smiled warmly
6:28:46at the priestess.
6:28:48Did you find the texts? And it was only
6:28:50when she bobbed her head in a sort of
6:28:52so-so motion that I realized either she
6:28:55could not or would not speak.
6:28:58Clotho gestured to her left, into the
6:29:00library itself.
6:29:02And I dragged my eyes away from the mute
6:29:04priestess long enough to take in the
6:29:06library.
6:29:07Not a cavernous room in a manner, not
6:29:10even close. This was
6:29:13It was as if the base of the mountain
6:29:14had been hollowed out by some massive
6:29:16digging beast, leaving a pit descending
6:29:19into the dark heart of the world.
6:29:21Around that gaping hole, carved into the
6:29:24mountain itself, spiraled level after
6:29:26level of shelves and books and reading
6:29:29areas leading into the inky black. From
6:29:32what I could see of the various levels
6:29:34as I drifted toward the carved stone
6:29:36railing overlooking the drop, the stacks
6:29:39shot far into the mountain itself like
6:29:41the spokes of a mighty wheel.
6:29:43And through it all, fluttering like
6:29:45moths' wings, the rustle of paper and
6:29:48parchment. Silent and yet alive, awake
6:29:52and humming and restless, some
6:29:54many-limbed beast at constant work.
6:29:57I peered upward, finding more levels
6:29:59rising toward the house above, and
6:30:02lurking far below, darkness.
6:30:05"What's at the bottom of the pit?" I
6:30:07asked as Rhys came up beside me, his
6:30:10shoulder brushing mine.
6:30:12"I once dared Cassian to fly down and
6:30:14see." Rhys braced his hands on the
6:30:16railing, gazing down into the gloom.
6:30:19"And?"
6:30:21"And he came back up faster than I've
6:30:23ever seen him fly, white as death.
6:30:26He never told me what he saw. The first
6:30:28few weeks, I thought it was a joke, just
6:30:30to pique my curiosity.
6:30:32But when I finally decided to see for
6:30:34myself a month later, he threatened to
6:30:37tie me to a chair. He said some things
6:30:39were better left unseen and undisturbed.
6:30:43It's been 200 years, and he still won't
6:30:45tell me what he saw. If you even mention
6:30:48it, he goes pale and shaky and won't
6:30:50talk for a few hours."
6:30:52My blood chilled.
6:30:54"Is it some sort of monster?"
6:30:56"I have no idea."
6:30:58Rhys jerked his chin toward Clotho, the
6:31:01priestess patiently waiting a few steps
6:31:03behind us, her face still in shadow.
6:31:06They don't speak or write of it, so if
6:31:08they know, they certainly won't tell me.
6:31:11So, if it doesn't bother us, then I
6:31:13won't bother it. That is, if it's even
6:31:16an it. Cassian never said if he saw
6:31:19anything living down there. Perhaps it's
6:31:21something else entirely.
6:31:24Considering the things I'd already
6:31:25witnessed, I didn't want to think about
6:31:27what lay at the bottom of the library,
6:31:30or what could make Cassian, who had seen
6:31:32more dreadful and deadly parts of the
6:31:33world than I could ever imagine, so
6:31:36terrified.
6:31:38Robes rustling, Clotho aimed for the
6:31:40sloping walkway into the library, and we
6:31:42fell into step behind her. The floors
6:31:45were red stone, like the rest of the
6:31:47place, but smooth and polished.
6:31:50I wondered if any of the priestesses had
6:31:52ever gone sledding down the spiral path.
6:31:54Not that I know of, re said into my
6:31:57mind. But Mora and I once tried when we
6:31:59were children. My mother caught us on
6:32:01our third level down, and we were sent
6:32:03to bed without supper.
6:32:05I clamped down on my smile. Was it such
6:32:08a crime? It was when we'd oiled up the
6:32:11floor, and the scholars were falling on
6:32:13their faces.
6:32:14I coughed to cover my laugh, lowering my
6:32:17head even with Clotho a few steps ahead.
6:32:20We passed stacks of books and parchment,
6:32:22the shelves either built into the stone
6:32:24itself, or made of dark solid wood.
6:32:27Hallways lined with both vanished into
6:32:29the mountain itself, and every few
6:32:31minutes a little reading area popped up,
6:32:34full of tidy tables, low-burning glass
6:32:36lamps, and deep-cushioned chairs and
6:32:38couches. Ancient woven rugs adorned the
6:32:41floors beneath them, usually set before
6:32:44fireplaces that had been carved into the
6:32:46rock, and kept well away from any
6:32:48shelves. Their grates fine-meshed enough
6:32:50to retain any wandering embers.
6:32:53Cozy, despite the size of the space,
6:32:55warm, despite the unknown terror lurking
6:32:58below.
6:33:00"If the others piss me off too much, I
6:33:02like to come down here for some peace
6:33:04and quiet."
6:33:05I smiled slightly at Reese, who kept
6:33:08looking ahead as we spoke mind to mind.
6:33:11"Don't they know by now that they can
6:33:12find you down here?"
6:33:14"Of course.
6:33:15But I never go to the same spot twice in
6:33:17a row, so it usually takes them so long
6:33:20to find me that they don't bother.
6:33:22Plus, they know that if I'm here, it's
6:33:25because I want to be alone." "Poor baby
6:33:27High Lord," I groaned, "having to run
6:33:30away to find solitude perfect for
6:33:32brooding."
6:33:33Reese pinched my behind, and I clamped
6:33:35down on my lip to keep from yelping. I
6:33:38could have sworn Clotho's shoulders
6:33:39shook with laughter.
6:33:41But before I could bite off Reese's head
6:33:43for the rippling pain my aching back
6:33:45muscles felt in the wake of the sudden
6:33:47movement,
6:33:48Clotho led us into a reading area about
6:33:50three levels down. The massive work
6:33:52table laden with fat ancient books bound
6:33:55in various dark leathers.
6:33:57A neat stack of paper was set to one
6:33:59side, along with an assortment of pens,
6:34:02and the reading lamps were at full glow,
6:34:04merry and sparkling in the gloom.
6:34:07A silver tea service gleamed on a
6:34:09low-lying table between the two leather
6:34:11couches before the grumbling fireplace,
6:34:14steam curling from the arched spout of
6:34:16the kettle.
6:34:17Biscuits and little sandwiches filled
6:34:19the platter beside it, along with a fat
6:34:21pile of napkins that subtly hinted we
6:34:24use them before touching the books.
6:34:26"Thank you," Reese told the priestess,
6:34:29who only pulled a book off the pile
6:34:30she'd undoubtedly gathered and opened it
6:34:33to a marked page. The ancient velvet
6:34:35ribbon was the color of old blood, but
6:34:38it was her hand that struck me as it met
6:34:40the golden light of the lamps.
6:34:43Her fingers were crooked, bent and
6:34:45twisted at such angles I would have
6:34:47thought her born with them were it not
6:34:49for the scarring.
6:34:51For a heartbeat, I was in a spring wood.
6:34:53For a heartbeat, I heard the crunch of
6:34:55stone on flesh and bone as I made
6:34:58another priestess smash her hand over
6:35:00and over.
6:35:02Reese put a hand on my lower back. The
6:35:05effort it must have taken Clotho to move
6:35:07everything into place with those knarled
6:35:09hands.
6:35:10But she looked toward another book, or
6:35:12at least her head turned that way, and
6:35:14it slid over to her.
6:35:16Magic. Right.
6:35:19She gestured with a finger that was bent
6:35:21in two different directions to the page
6:35:23she'd selected, then to the book.
6:35:26"I'll look," Reese said, then inclined
6:35:28his head. "We'll give a shout if we need
6:35:30anything."
6:35:31Clotho bowed her head again and began
6:35:33striding away, careful and silent.
6:35:37"Thank you," I said to her.
6:35:39The priestess paused, looking back, and
6:35:42bowed her head, hood swaying.
6:35:45Within seconds, she was gone.
6:35:47I stared after her even as Reese slid
6:35:50into one of the two chairs before the
6:35:51piles of books.
6:35:53"A long time ago, Clotho was hurt very
6:35:56badly by a group of males," Reese said
6:35:59quietly. I didn't need details to know
6:36:02what that had entailed. The edge in
6:36:04Reese's voice implied enough.
6:36:06"They cut out her tongue, so she
6:36:08couldn't tell anyone who had hurt her,
6:36:10and smashed her hands so she couldn't
6:36:12write it."
6:36:14Every word was more clipped than the
6:36:15last, and darkness snarled through the
6:36:17small space. My stomach turned.
6:36:21"Why not kill her?"
6:36:22"Because it was more entertaining for
6:36:24them that way.
6:36:26That is, until Mor found her and brought
6:36:28her to me."
6:36:30When he'd undoubtedly looked into her
6:36:31mind and seen their faces,
6:36:34"I let Mor hunt them." His wings tucked
6:36:37in tightly. "And when she finished, she
6:36:39stayed down here for a month, helping
6:36:41Clotho heal as best as could be
6:36:43expected, but also wiping away the stain
6:36:47of them.
6:36:48Mor's trauma had been different, but I
6:36:51understood why she'd done it, wanted to
6:36:53be here.
6:36:54I wondered if it had granted her any
6:36:56measure of closure.
6:36:58Cassian and Azriel were healed
6:37:00completely after Hybern. Nothing could
6:37:02be done for Clotho.
6:37:04The males were
6:37:06healing her as they hurt her, making the
6:37:09injuries permanent. When Mor found her,
6:37:12the damage had been set.
6:37:14They hadn't finished her hands, so we
6:37:16were able to salvage them, give her some
6:37:18use, but to heal her, the wounds would
6:37:21have needed to be ripped open again. I
6:37:24offered to take the pain away while it
6:37:25was done, but
6:37:27she could not endure it, what having the
6:37:29wounds open again would trigger in her
6:37:31mind, her heart. She has lived down here
6:37:34since then with others [clears throat]
6:37:36like her.
6:37:37Her magic helps with her mobility.
6:37:40I knew we should begin working, but I
6:37:41asked,
6:37:43"Are all the priestesses in this library
6:37:45like her?"
6:37:47"Yes."
6:37:48The word held centuries of rage and
6:37:50pain.
6:37:51"I made this library into a refuge for
6:37:53them. Some come to heal, work as
6:37:56acolytes, and then leave. Some take the
6:37:59oaths to the Cauldron and Mother to
6:38:01become priestesses and remain here
6:38:02forever. But it belongs to them whether
6:38:05they stay a week or a lifetime.
6:38:07Outsiders are allowed to use the library
6:38:09for research, but only if the
6:38:11priestesses approve, and only if they
6:38:13take binding oaths to do no harm while
6:38:16they visit. This library belongs to
6:38:18them."
6:38:20"Who was here before them?" "A few
6:38:22cranky old scholars who cursed me
6:38:24soundly when I relocated them to other
6:38:26libraries in the city. They still get
6:38:28access, but when and where is always
6:38:31approved by the priestesses."
6:38:34Choice. It had always been about my
6:38:36choice with him, and for others as well,
6:38:39long before or ever learned the hard way
6:38:41about it.
6:38:42The question must have been in my eyes
6:38:44because Reese added,
6:38:46"I came here a great deal in those weeks
6:38:48after under the mountain."
6:38:50My throat tightened as I leaned in to
6:38:52brush a kiss to his cheek.
6:38:54"Thank you for sharing this place with
6:38:56me." "It belongs to you, too, now." And
6:38:59I knew he meant not just in terms of us
6:39:01being mates, but
6:39:03in the ways it belonged to the other
6:39:05females here who had endured and
6:39:07survived.
6:39:09I gave him a half smile.
6:39:11"I suppose it's a miracle that I can
6:39:13even stand to be underground."
6:39:15But his features remained solemn,
6:39:17contemplative.
6:39:18"It is."
6:39:20He added softly,
6:39:22"I'm very proud of you."
6:39:24My eyes burned and I blinked as I faced
6:39:26the books.
6:39:28"And I suppose," I said with an effort
6:39:30at lightness,
6:39:31"that it's a miracle I can actually read
6:39:33these things."
6:39:35Reese's answering smile was lovely and
6:39:37just a bit wicked.
6:39:39"I believe my little lessons helped."
6:39:42"Yes, Reese is the greatest lover a
6:39:44female can hope for is undoubtedly how I
6:39:47learned to read." "I was only trying to
6:39:49tell you what you now know." My blood
6:39:51heated a bit. "Hmm," was all I said,
6:39:54pulling a book toward me.
6:39:56"I'll take that "Hmm" as a challenge."
6:39:59His hand slid down my thigh, then cupped
6:40:01my knee, his thumb brushing along its
6:40:04side.
6:40:05Even through my leathers, the heat of
6:40:07him seeped to my very bones.
6:40:10"Maybe I'll haul you between the stags
6:40:12and see how quiet you can be."
6:40:14"Hmm," I flipped through the pages, not
6:40:17seeing any of the text.
6:40:19His hand began a lethal taunting
6:40:21exploration of my thigh, his fingers
6:40:24grazing along the sensitive inside.
6:40:26Higher, higher. He leaned in to drag a
6:40:29book toward himself, but whispered in my
6:40:31ear, "Or maybe I'll spread you out on
6:40:34this desk and lick you until you scream
6:40:36loud enough to wake whatever is at the
6:40:38bottom of the library. I whipped my head
6:40:41toward him. His eyes were glazed, almost
6:40:44sleepy.
6:40:45"I was fully committed to that plan," I
6:40:47said, even as his hand stopped very,
6:40:50very close to the apex of my thighs.
6:40:53"Until you brought in that thing down
6:40:55below."
6:40:56A feline smile. He held my stare as his
6:40:59tongue brushed his bottom lip.
6:41:02My breasts tightened beneath my shirt,
6:41:04and his gaze dropped, watching. "I would
6:41:07have thought," he mused, "that our bout
6:41:09this morning would be enough to tide you
6:41:11over until tonight." His hand slid
6:41:14between my legs, brazenly cupping me,
6:41:17his thumb pushing down on an aching
6:41:19spot. A low groan slipped from me, and
6:41:22my cheeks heated in its wake.
6:41:24"Apparently, I didn't do a good enough
6:41:26job sating you if you're so easily riled
6:41:29after a few hours."
6:41:32"Prick," I breathed, but the word was
6:41:34ragged. His thumb pressed down harder,
6:41:37circling roughly. Rhys leaned in again,
6:41:40kissing my neck, that place right under
6:41:42my ear, and said against my skin,
6:41:45"Let's see what names you call me when
6:41:47my head is between your legs, Feyre,
6:41:50darling."
6:41:51And then he was gone. He'd winnowed away
6:41:54half the books with him. I started, my
6:41:57body foreign and cold, dizzy and
6:41:59disorienting.
6:42:00"Where the hell are you?" I scanned
6:42:02around me and found nothing but shadow
6:42:05and merry flame and books.
6:42:07Two levels below.
6:42:09"And why are you two levels below?" I
6:42:12shoved out of my chair, back aching in
6:42:14protest as I stormed for the walkway and
6:42:16rail beyond, then peered down into the
6:42:18gloom.
6:42:20Sure enough, in a reading area two
6:42:22levels below, I could spy his dark hair
6:42:24and wings, could spy him leaning back in
6:42:27his chair before an identical desk, an
6:42:29ankle crossed over a knee, smirking up
6:42:32at me.
6:42:33Because I can't work with you
6:42:34distracting me.
6:42:36I scowled at him. I'm distracting you?
6:42:40If you're sitting next to me, the last
6:42:42thing on my mind is reading dusty old
6:42:43books. Especially when you're in all
6:42:46that tight leather.
6:42:47Pig.
6:42:49His chuckle echoed up through the
6:42:50library amid the fluttering papers and
6:42:53scratching pens of the priestesses
6:42:54working throughout.
6:42:56How can you winnow inside the house? I
6:42:58thought there were wards against it.
6:43:00The library makes its own rules,
6:43:02apparently. I snorted. Two hours of
6:43:06work, he promised me, turning back to
6:43:08the table and flaring his wings, a
6:43:10veritable screen to block my view of him
6:43:13and his view of me.
6:43:15Then we can play.
6:43:17I gave him a vulgar gesture. I saw that.
6:43:20I did it again, and his laugh floated to
6:43:22me as I faced the books stacked before
6:43:24me and began to read.
6:43:29We found a myriad of information about
6:43:31the wall and its forming.
6:43:33When we compared our notes two hours
6:43:34later, many of the texts were
6:43:36conflicting, all of them claiming
6:43:38absolute authority on the subject. But
6:43:41there were a few similar details that
6:43:43Rhys had not known.
6:43:44He had been healing at the cabin in the
6:43:46mountains when they'd formed the wall,
6:43:48when they'd signed that treaty.
6:43:50The details that emerged had been murky
6:43:52at best, but the various texts Clotho
6:43:55had dug up on the wall's formation and
6:43:57rules agreed on one thing. It had never
6:44:00been made to last. No, initially the
6:44:03wall had been a temporary solution to
6:44:05cleave human and faerie until peace
6:44:07settled long enough for them to later
6:44:09reconvene and decide how they were to
6:44:11live together as one people.
6:44:14But the wall had remained. Humans had
6:44:16grown old and died, and their children
6:44:18had forgotten the promises of their
6:44:20parents, their grandparents, their
6:44:22ancestors. And the high fae who
6:44:24survived, it was a new world without
6:44:27slaves. Lesser fairies stepped in to
6:44:30replace the missing free labor.
6:44:32Territory boundaries have been redrawn
6:44:34to accommodate those displaced.
6:44:37Such a great shift in the world in those
6:44:39initial centuries. So many working to
6:44:41move past war, to heal, that the wall
6:44:45the wall became permanent. The wall
6:44:47became legend.
6:44:49"Even if all seven courts ally," I said,
6:44:52as we plucked grapes from a silver bowl
6:44:54in a quiet sitting room in the house of
6:44:56wind, having left the dim library for
6:44:59some much-needed sunshine,
6:45:01"even if Kier and the Court of
6:45:02Nightmares join, too,
6:45:04will we stand a chance in this war?"
6:45:07Rhys leaned back in the embroidered
6:45:09chair before the floor-to-ceiling
6:45:10window.
6:45:11Velaris was a glittering sprawl below
6:45:13and beyond, serene and lovely, even with
6:45:17the scars of battle now peppering it.
6:45:19"Army against army, the possibility of
6:45:22victory is slim.
6:45:24Blunt, honest words."
6:45:26I shifted in my own identical chair on
6:45:28the other side of the low-lying table
6:45:30between us. "Could you
6:45:33if you and the King of Hybern went
6:45:34head-to-head,
6:45:36would I win?" Rhys lifted a brow and
6:45:39studied the city.
6:45:40"I don't know.
6:45:41He's been smart about keeping the extent
6:45:43of his power hidden, but he had to
6:45:45resort to trickery and threats to beat
6:45:47us that day in Hybern.
6:45:49He has thousands of years of knowledge
6:45:51and training. If he and I fought,
6:45:54I doubt he would let it come to that.
6:45:56He stands a better chance at sure
6:45:58victory by overwhelming us with numbers
6:46:00and stretching us thin.
6:46:02If we fought one-on-one, if he'd even
6:46:04accept an open challenge from me, the
6:46:07damage would be catastrophic, and that's
6:46:09without him wielding the Cauldron."
6:46:11My heart stumbled. Rhys went on.
6:46:15"I'm willing to take the brunt of it if
6:46:16it means the others will at least stand
6:46:18with us against him."
6:46:20I clenched the tufted arms of the chair.
6:46:23You shouldn't have to.
6:46:25It might be the only choice. I don't
6:46:27accept that as an option.
6:46:29He blinked at me.
6:46:30Prythian might need me as an option.
6:46:33Because with that power of his,
6:46:35he'd take on the king and his entire
6:46:37army, burn himself out until he was
6:46:41I need you as an option in my future.
6:46:46Silence.
6:46:47And even with the sun warming my feet, a
6:46:49terrible cold spread through me.
6:46:52His throat bobbed.
6:46:53If it means giving you a future, then
6:46:55I'm willing to do You will do no such
6:46:58thing. I panted through my bared teeth,
6:47:01leaning forward in my chair.
6:47:03Rhys only watched me, eyes shadowed.
6:47:06How can you ask me not to give
6:47:08everything I have to ensure that you,
6:47:10that my family and people survive?
6:47:13You've given enough. Not enough. Not
6:47:16yet.
6:47:17It was hard to breathe, to see past the
6:47:20burning in my eyes. Why? Where does this
6:47:23come from, Rhys?
6:47:25For once, he didn't answer.
6:47:27And there was something brittle enough
6:47:28in his expression, some long unhealed
6:47:31wound that glimmered there, that I
6:47:33sighed, rubbed my face, and then said,
6:47:36Just work with me, with all of us
6:47:39together.
6:47:41This isn't your burden alone.
6:47:43He plucked another grape from its stem,
6:47:45chewed. His lips tilted in a faint
6:47:48smile. So, what do you propose then?
6:47:51I could still see that vulnerability in
6:47:53his eyes, still feel it in that bond
6:47:56between us, but I angled my head. I
6:47:58sorted through all I knew, all that had
6:48:01happened, considered the books I'd read
6:48:03in the library below, a library that
6:48:05housed
6:48:07Amren warned us to never put the two
6:48:09halves of the book together, I mused.
6:48:12But we, I did.
6:48:15She said that older things might be
6:48:17awoken by it, might come sniffing.
6:48:20Rhys crossed an ankle over a knee.
6:48:23"Hybern might have the numbers," I said,
6:48:25"but what if we had the monsters? You
6:48:28said Hybern will see an alliance with
6:48:29all the courts coming,
6:48:31but perhaps not one with things wholly
6:48:34unconnected."
6:48:35I leaned forward. "And I'm not talking
6:48:37about the monsters roaming across the
6:48:39world. I am talking about one in
6:48:42particular who has nothing to lose and
6:48:45everything to gain. One that I would do
6:48:47everything in my power to use rather
6:48:50than let Rhys face the brunt of this
6:48:51alone."
6:48:53His brows rose.
6:48:54"Oh."
6:48:56"The Bone Carver," I clarified. "He and
6:48:59Amren have both been looking for a way
6:49:00back to their own worlds.
6:49:02The Carver had been insistent,
6:49:04relentless in asking me that day in the
6:49:06prison about where I had gone during
6:49:08death.
6:49:09I could have sworn Rhys's golden-brown
6:49:11skin paled, but I added, "I wonder if
6:49:14it's time to ask him what he'd give to
6:49:17go back home."
6:49:22Chapter 21
6:49:25The aching muscles along my back, core,
6:49:27and thighs had gone into complete revolt
6:49:29by the time Rhys and I parted ways, my
6:49:32mate heading off to track down Cassian,
6:49:34who would be my escort tomorrow morning
6:49:36to the prison.
6:49:38If both of us had gone, it would perhaps
6:49:39look too desperate, too vital.
6:49:43But if the High Lady and her general
6:49:45went to visit the Carver to pose some
6:49:47hypothetical questions,
6:49:49it would still show our hand, but
6:49:51perhaps not quite how badly we needed
6:49:53any extra bit of assistance. And
6:49:55Cassian, unsurprisingly, knew more about
6:49:58the Carver than anyone, thanks to some
6:50:00morbid fascination with all of the
6:50:02prison's inmates,
6:50:03especially since he was responsible for
6:50:05jailing some of them.
6:50:07But while Rhys sought out Cassian, I had
6:50:10a task of my own.
6:50:12I was wincing and hissing as I strode
6:50:14through the murky red halls of the house
6:50:16to find my sister and Amren, to see
6:50:19which of them was still standing after
6:50:20their first lesson, among other things.
6:50:24I found them in a quiet forgotten
6:50:26workroom, coldly watching the other.
6:50:29Books lay scattered on the table between
6:50:31them. A ticking clock by the dusty
6:50:33cabinets was the only sound.
6:50:36"Sorry to interrupt your staring
6:50:37contest," I said, lingering in the
6:50:40doorway. I rubbed at a spot low in my
6:50:42back.
6:50:43"I wanted to see how the first lesson
6:50:45was going."
6:50:46"Fine." Amren didn't take her eyes off
6:50:49my sister, a faint smile playing about
6:50:52her red mouth. I studied Nesta, who
6:50:54gazed at Amren utterly stone-faced.
6:50:57"What are you doing?"
6:50:59"Waiting," Amren said. "For what?" "For
6:51:03busybodies to leave us alone." I
6:51:06straightened, clearing my throat.
6:51:08"Is this part of her training?" Amren
6:51:11turned her head to me with exaggerated
6:51:13slowness, her chin-length razor-straight
6:51:15hair shifting with the movement.
6:51:18"Rhys has his own method of training
6:51:20you. I have mine." Her white teeth
6:51:23flashed with every word.
6:51:25"We visit the Court of Nightmares
6:51:26tomorrow night. She needs some basic
6:51:29training before we do."
6:51:32"Like what?" Amren sighed at the
6:51:34ceiling, shielding herself from prying
6:51:37minds and powers. I blinked. I should
6:51:40have thought of that, that if Nesta were
6:51:42to join us, be at the Hewn City, she
6:51:45would need some defenses beyond what we
6:51:47could offer her.
6:51:48Nesta at last looked to me, her face as
6:51:51cold as ever.
6:51:53"Are you all right?" I asked her. Amren
6:51:55clicked her tongue. "She's fine.
6:51:57Stubborn as an ass, but as you're
6:51:59related, I'm not surprised." I scowled.
6:52:03"How am I supposed to know what your
6:52:05methods are? For all I know, you picked
6:52:07up some terrible techniques in that
6:52:08prison.
6:52:10Careful. So, so careful.
6:52:13Amren hissed, "That place taught me
6:52:15plenty of things, but certainly not
6:52:17this."
6:52:19I angled my head, the portrait of
6:52:21curiosity.
6:52:22Did you ever interact with the others?
6:52:25The fewer people who knew about my trip
6:52:27tomorrow to see the Carver, the safer it
6:52:29was. The less chance of Hybern catching
6:52:32wind of it. Not for any fear of
6:52:34betrayal, but there was always risk.
6:52:38Azriel, now off hunting for information
6:52:40on the Autumn Court, would be told when
6:52:42he returned tonight. More, I'd tell her
6:52:44eventually.
6:52:46But Amren?
6:52:47Rhys and I had decided to wait to tell
6:52:49Amren. The last time we'd gone to the
6:52:52prison, she'd been testy.
6:52:54Telling her we planned to unleash one of
6:52:56her fellow inmates, perhaps not the best
6:52:59thing to mention while we waited for her
6:53:00to find a way to heal that wall and
6:53:03train my sister.
6:53:05Impatience rippled across Amren's face,
6:53:07those silver eyes flaring. "I only spoke
6:53:10to them in whispers and echoes through
6:53:12rock, girl. And I was glad of it."
6:53:15"What's the prison?" Nesta asked at
6:53:18last. "A hell entombed in stone." Amren
6:53:22said, "Full of creatures you should
6:53:24thank the Mother no longer walk the
6:53:25earth freely."
6:53:27Nesta frowned deeply, but shut her
6:53:29mouth.
6:53:30"Like who?" I asked, any extra
6:53:33information she might have. Amren bared
6:53:36her teeth. "I am giving a magic lesson,
6:53:39not a history one." She waved a
6:53:41dismissive hand. "If you want someone to
6:53:43gossip with, go find one of the dogs.
6:53:46I'm sure Cassian's still sniffing around
6:53:48upstairs."
6:53:49Nesta's lips twitched upward.
6:53:52Amren pointed at her with a slender
6:53:53finger ending in a sharp manicured nail.
6:53:56"Concentrate. Vital organs must be
6:54:00shielded at all times."
6:54:02I tapped to hand against the open
6:54:03doorway.
6:54:05I'll keep looking for more information
6:54:06for you in the library, Amren.
6:54:09No response.
6:54:10Good luck, I added. She doesn't need
6:54:13luck, Amren said. Nesta huffed a laugh.
6:54:17I took that as the only farewell I'd
6:54:19get.
6:54:20Perhaps letting Amren and Nesta train
6:54:22together was a bad choice, even if the
6:54:25prospect of unleashing them upon the
6:54:27court of nightmares.
6:54:29I smiled a bit at the thought.
6:54:31By the time Mor, Rhys, Cassian, and I
6:54:33gathered for dinner at the townhouse,
6:54:35Azriel still off spying,
6:54:38my muscles were so sore I could barely
6:54:40walk up the front stairs. Sore enough
6:54:42that any plans I had to visit Lucien up
6:54:44at the house after the meal vanished.
6:54:47Mor was testy and quiet throughout, no
6:54:50doubt in anticipation of the visit
6:54:52tomorrow night.
6:54:54She'd had to work with Keir plenty
6:54:55throughout the centuries, and yet
6:54:57tomorrow
6:54:59she'd only warned Rhys once while we ate
6:55:01that he should thoroughly consider any
6:55:03offer Keir might give him in exchange
6:55:05for his army.
6:55:06Rhys had shrugged, saying he'd think
6:55:08about it when the time came. A
6:55:10non-answer, and one that made Mor grit
6:55:13her teeth.
6:55:14I didn't blame her. Long before the war,
6:55:17her family had brutalized her in ways I
6:55:19didn't let myself consider, not a day
6:55:22before I was to meet with them again,
6:55:24ask them for help, work with them.
6:55:27Rhys, mother bless him, had a bath
6:55:29waiting for me after the meal. I'd need
6:55:32all my strength for tomorrow, for the
6:55:34monsters I was to face beneath two very
6:55:36different mountains.
6:55:40I had not visited this place for months,
6:55:43but the carved stone walls were just as
6:55:45I'd last seen them. The darkness still
6:55:47interrupted by bracketed torches.
6:55:50Not the prison under the mountain,
6:55:53but instead of Claire's mutilated body
6:55:55spiked high to the wall above me.
6:55:58Her blue-gray eyes were still wide with
6:56:00terror. Gone was the haughty iciness,
6:56:03the queenly jut to her chin.
6:56:05Nesta. They'd done precisely to her,
6:56:08wound for wound, what they'd done to
6:56:10Claire.
6:56:11And behind me, screaming and pleading, I
6:56:14turned, finding Elain, naked and
6:56:17weeping, tied to that enormous spit,
6:56:19what I had once been threatened to
6:56:21endure. Gnarled, masked faeries rotated
6:56:24the iron handles, turning her over.
6:56:27I tried to move, tried to lunge, but I
6:56:30was frozen, utterly bound by invisible
6:56:32chains to the floor.
6:56:34Feminine laughter flitted from the other
6:56:36end of that throne room, from the dais,
6:56:38now empty.
6:56:40Empty, because that was Amarantha,
6:56:43strutting into the gloom, down some hall
6:56:45that hadn't been there before, but now
6:56:46stretched away into nothing.
6:56:49Rhysand followed a step behind her,
6:56:51going with her to that bedroom.
6:56:55He looked over his shoulder at me only
6:56:56once, over his wings. His wings, which
6:57:00were out, which she'd see and destroy
6:57:02right after she
6:57:04I was screaming for him to stop,
6:57:06thrashing at those bonds. Elain's
6:57:08pleading rose higher and higher. Rhys
6:57:11kept walking with Amarantha, let her
6:57:13take his hand and tug him along. I
6:57:15couldn't move, couldn't stop it, any of
6:57:18it.
6:57:21I was hauled out of the dream like a
6:57:22thrashing fish from a net cast deep into
6:57:25the sea.
6:57:26And when I surfaced, I remained half
6:57:28there, half in my body, half under the
6:57:31mountain, watching as Breathe.
6:57:34The word was an order, laced with that
6:57:36primal command he so rarely wielded. But
6:57:39my eyes focused, my chest expanded. I
6:57:43slipped a bit further back into my body.
6:57:45Again.
6:57:47I did so. His face came into view,
6:57:49faelights murmuring to life inside their
6:57:51lamps and bowls in our bedroom. His
6:57:54wings were tucked in tight, framing his
6:57:56disheveled hair, his drawn face.
6:57:59Rhys.
6:58:00Again, he only said, I obeyed.
6:58:04My bones had turned brittle, my stomach
6:58:06a roiling mess. I closed my eyes,
6:58:09fighting the nausea. Rippling terror
6:58:12kept its talons buried deep. I could
6:58:14still see it, the way she led him down
6:58:16that hall to
6:58:18I surged, rolling to the edge of the
6:58:20mattress and clamping down hard as my
6:58:22body tried to heave up its contents onto
6:58:25the carpet. His hand was instantly on my
6:58:27back, rubbing soothing circles, utterly
6:58:30willing to let me vomit right over the
6:58:32side of the bed. But I focused on my
6:58:34breathing, on closing down those
6:58:37memories one by one, memories repainted.
6:58:41I lay half sprawled over the edge for
6:58:43uncounted minutes.
6:58:44He rubbed my back throughout.
6:58:47When I could finally move, when the
6:58:49nausea had subsided, I twisted back
6:58:52over, and the sight of that face
6:58:55I slid my arms around his waist,
6:58:57gripping tightly as he pressed a silent
6:58:59kiss to my hair, reminding myself over
6:59:01and over that we were out, we had
6:59:03survived. Never again. Never again would
6:59:07I let someone hurt him like that, hurt
6:59:09my sisters like that.
6:59:11Never again.
6:59:16Chapter 22
6:59:19I felt Rhys's attention on me while we
6:59:21dressed the next morning and throughout
6:59:23our hearty breakfast. Yet he didn't
6:59:26push, didn't demand to know what had
6:59:28dragged me into that screaming hell.
6:59:30It had been a long while since those
6:59:32nightmares had hauled either of us from
6:59:34sleep, blurred the lines. It was only
6:59:37when we stood in the foyer, waiting for
6:59:39Cassian before we went out to the
6:59:40prison, that Rhys asked from where he
6:59:42leaned against the stair banister, "Do
6:59:45you need to talk about it?" My Illyrian
6:59:47leather groaned as I turned toward him.
6:59:50Rhys clarified, "With me or anyone?"
6:59:54I answered him truthfully, tugging at
6:59:56the end of my braid.
6:59:58With everything bearing down on us,
7:00:00everything at stake, I let my braid
7:00:03drop. "I don't know. I think it's torn
7:00:06open some part of me that was slowly
7:00:08repairing. Repairing thanks to both of
7:00:11us."
7:00:12He nodded, no fear or reproach in his
7:00:15eyes.
7:00:16So I told him all of it, stumbling over
7:00:19the parts that still made me ill.
7:00:21He only listened. And when I was done,
7:00:24that shakiness remained, but speaking
7:00:27it, voicing it aloud to him,
7:00:29the savage grip of those terrors
7:00:31lightened, cleared away like dew in the
7:00:33sun. I freed a long breath, as if
7:00:36blowing those fears from me, letting my
7:00:39body loosen in its wake.
7:00:41Rhys silently pushed off the banister
7:00:43and kissed me. Once, twice.
7:00:46Cassian stalked through the front door a
7:00:48heartbeat later and groaned that it was
7:00:50too early to stomach the sight of us
7:00:52kissing. My mate only snarled at him
7:00:55before he took us both by the hand and
7:00:57winnowed us to the prison.
7:01:00Rhys gripped my fingers tighter than
7:01:01usual as the wind ripped around us,
7:01:04Cassian now wisely keeping silent. And
7:01:07as we emerged from that black tumbling
7:01:09wind, Rhys leaned over to kiss me a
7:01:11third time, sweet and soft, before the
7:01:14gray light and roaring wind greeted us.
7:01:17Apparently, the prison was cold and
7:01:19misty no matter the time of year.
7:01:22Standing at the base of the mossy rocky
7:01:24mountain under which the prison was
7:01:25built, Cassian and I frowned up the
7:01:28slope. Despite the Illyrian leathers,
7:01:31the chill seeped into my bones. I rubbed
7:01:34at my arms, lifting my brows at Rhys,
7:01:37who had remained in his usual attire, so
7:01:39out of place in this damp, windy speck
7:01:41of green in the middle of a gray sea.
7:01:44The wind ruffled his black hair as he
7:01:46surveyed us, Cassian already sizing up
7:01:48the mountain like some opponent.
7:01:51Twin Illyrian blades were crossed over
7:01:52the general's muscled back.
7:01:55"When you're in there," Rhys said, the
7:01:57words barely audible over the wind and
7:01:59silver streams running down the
7:02:01mountainside,
7:02:02"you won't be able to reach me."
7:02:05"Why?"
7:02:06I rubbed my already freezing hands
7:02:07together before puffing a hot breath
7:02:10into the cradle of my palms.
7:02:12"Wards and spells far older than
7:02:14Prythian," was all Rhys said. He jerked
7:02:17his chin to Cassian.
7:02:19"Don't let each other out of your
7:02:20sight." It was the dead seriousness with
7:02:23which Rhys spoke that kept me from
7:02:25retorting.
7:02:26Indeed, my mate's eyes were hard,
7:02:28unflinching.
7:02:30While we were here, he and Azriel were
7:02:32to discuss what he'd found out about
7:02:33Autumn's leanings in this war, and then
7:02:36adjust their strategy for the meeting
7:02:37with the High Lords.
7:02:39But I could sense it, the urge to
7:02:41request he join us, watch over us.
7:02:44"Shout down the bond when you're out
7:02:46again," Rhys said with a mildness that
7:02:48didn't reach his gaze.
7:02:50Cassian looked back over his shoulder.
7:02:53"Get back to Velaris, you mother hen.
7:02:55We'll be fine." Rhys leveled another
7:02:57uncharacteristically hard stare at him.
7:03:00"Remember who you put in here, Cassian."
7:03:03Cassian just tucked in his wings, as if
7:03:06every muscle shifted toward battle,
7:03:08steady and solid as the mountain we were
7:03:10about to climb.
7:03:12With a wink at me, Rhys vanished.
7:03:15Cassian checked the buckles on his
7:03:16swords and motioned me to start the long
7:03:18trek up the hill.
7:03:20My gut tightened at the climb ahead, the
7:03:22shrieking hollowness of this place.
7:03:25"Who did you put in here?" The mossy
7:03:28earth cushioned my steps.
7:03:30Cassian put a scar-flecked finger to his
7:03:32lips. "Best left for another time."
7:03:35"Right." I fell into step beside him, my
7:03:38thighs burning with the steep hike. Mist
7:03:41chilled my face. Conserving his
7:03:43strength, Cassian wasn't wasting a drop
7:03:45of energy on shielding us from the
7:03:47elements.
7:03:48You really think unleashing the Carver
7:03:50will do the trick against Hybern?
7:03:52You're the general, I panted. You tell
7:03:55me.
7:03:56He considered, the wind tossing his dark
7:03:58hair over his tanned face.
7:04:01Even if you promise to find a way to
7:04:02send him back to his own world with the
7:04:04book, or give him whatever unholy thing
7:04:07he wants, Cassian mused. I think you'd
7:04:10better find a way to control him in this
7:04:12world, or else we'll be fighting enemies
7:04:14on all fronts.
7:04:16And I know which one will hand our asses
7:04:18to us.
7:04:20The Carver's that bad?
7:04:22You're asking this right before we're to
7:04:24meet with him?
7:04:25I hissed. I assumed Rhys would have put
7:04:27his foot down if it was that risky.
7:04:30Rhys has been known to hatch plans that
7:04:31make my heart stop dead, Cassian
7:04:33grumbled. So, I wouldn't count on him to
7:04:35be the voice of reason.
7:04:37I scowled at Cassian, earning a wolfish
7:04:40grin in return.
7:04:41But Cassian scanned the heavy gray sky,
7:04:44as if hunting for spying eyes, then the
7:04:47moss and grass and rocks beneath our
7:04:49boots for listening ears below.
7:04:52There was life here, he said, answering
7:04:55my question at last. Before the High
7:04:57Lords took Prythian. Old gods, we called
7:05:00them. They ruled the forests and the
7:05:02rivers and the mountains. Some were
7:05:05those things.
7:05:06Then the magic shifted to the High Fae,
7:05:08who brought the Cauldron and Mother
7:05:10along with them.
7:05:11And though the old gods were still
7:05:12worshipped by a select few, most people
7:05:15forgot them.
7:05:16I grappled onto a large gray rock as I
7:05:19climbed over it.
7:05:20The Bone Carver was an old god?
7:05:23He dragged a hand through his hair, the
7:05:25Siphon gleaming in the watery light.
7:05:28That's what legend says, along with
7:05:30whispers of being able to fell hundreds
7:05:32of soldiers with one breath.
7:05:34A chill rippled down my skin that had
7:05:37nothing to do with the brisk wind.
7:05:39Useful on a battlefield?
7:05:41Cassian's golden-brown skin paled while
7:05:44his eyes churned with the thought.
7:05:46Not without the proper precautions. Not
7:05:49without him being bound to obey us
7:05:51within an inch of his life.
7:05:53Which I'd have to figure out as well, I
7:05:55supposed.
7:05:57How did he wind up here? In the prison?
7:06:00I don't know. No one does.
7:06:02Cassian helped me over a boulder, his
7:06:05hand gripping mine tightly.
7:06:07But, how do you plan on freeing him from
7:06:10the prison?
7:06:11I winced.
7:06:12I suppose our friend would know, since
7:06:14she got out.
7:06:16Careful. We'd have to be careful when
7:06:18mentioning Amren's name here.
7:06:20Cassian's face grew solemn.
7:06:23She doesn't talk about how she did it,
7:06:25Feyre. I'd be careful how you push her.
7:06:28Since we still had not told Amren where
7:06:30we were today, what we were doing.
7:06:33I thought about saying more, but ahead,
7:06:35far up the slope, the massive bone gates
7:06:38opened.
7:06:42I'd forgotten it. The weight of the air
7:06:44inside the prison. Like wading through
7:06:46the unstirred air of a tomb. Like
7:06:48stealing a breath from the open mouth of
7:06:50a skull.
7:06:52We both bore an Illyrian blade in one
7:06:53hand, the faylight bobbing ahead to show
7:06:56the way, occasionally dancing and
7:06:58sliding along the shining metal.
7:07:01Our other hands?
7:07:02Cassian clenched my fingers as tightly
7:07:04as I clutched his, while we descended
7:07:06into the eternal blackness of the
7:07:08prison, our steps crunching on the dry
7:07:11ground.
7:07:12There were no doors, none that we could
7:07:14see. But behind that solid black rock, I
7:07:17could still feel them. Could have sworn
7:07:20a faint scratching sound filled the
7:07:21passage from the other side of that
7:07:23rock.
7:07:24As as someone were running their nails
7:07:26down it, something huge and old and
7:07:30quiet as the wind through a field of
7:07:31wheat.
7:07:33Cassian kept utterly silent, tracking
7:07:35something, counting something.
7:07:38This could be
7:07:40a very bad idea, I admitted, my grip
7:07:43tightening on his hand. "Oh, it most
7:07:45certainly is," Cassian said with a faint
7:07:48smile as we continued down and down into
7:07:50the heavy black and thrumming silence.
7:07:53"But this is war. We don't have the
7:07:55luxury of good ideas, only picking
7:07:58between the bad ones."
7:08:03The Bone Carver's cell door swung open
7:08:05the moment I laid my palm to it.
7:08:07"Worth the misery of being Rhys's mate?"
7:08:10Cassian quipped as the white bones swung
7:08:12away into darkness,
7:08:14a light chuckle within.
7:08:16The amusement faded from Cassian's face
7:08:18at the sound as we walked into the cell,
7:08:21still hand in hand.
7:08:23The orb of faelight bobbed ahead,
7:08:25illuminating the stone-hewn cell.
7:08:27Cassian growled at what it revealed, who
7:08:30it revealed. Wholly different, no doubt,
7:08:33from the same young boy who now smiled
7:08:36at me.
7:08:37Dark-haired with eyes of crushing blue.
7:08:40I started at the child's face, what I
7:08:42had not noticed that first time, what I
7:08:44had not understood. It was Rhysand's
7:08:47face. The coloring, the eyes, it was my
7:08:50mate's face.
7:08:52But the Carver's full, wide mouth curled
7:08:54into that hideous smile, that was my
7:08:57mouth, my father's mouth.
7:09:00The hair on my arms rose.
7:09:02The Carver inclined his head in
7:09:03greeting, in greeting and in
7:09:05confirmation, as if he knew precisely
7:09:08what I realized, who I had seen and was
7:09:10still seeing. The High Lord's son, my
7:09:14son, our son, should we survive long
7:09:17enough to bear him, should I not fail in
7:09:19my task to recruit the Carver, should we
7:09:22not fail to unify the High Lords and the
7:09:24Court of Nightmares and keep that wall
7:09:26intact?
7:09:28It was an effort to keep my knees from
7:09:29buckling.
7:09:30Cassian's face was pale enough that I
7:09:32knew whatever he was seeing, it wasn't a
7:09:35beautiful young boy.
7:09:37"I was wondering when you'd return." The
7:09:39Carver said, that boy's voice sweet and
7:09:42yet dreadful from the ancient creature
7:09:44that lurked beneath it. "Hi, Lady." He
7:09:47added to me.
7:09:48"Please accept my congratulations on
7:09:50your union." A glance at Cassian. "I can
7:09:53smell the wind on you." Another little
7:09:56smile. "Have you brought me a gift?"
7:09:59I reached into the pocket of my jacket
7:10:02and chucked a small shard of bone no
7:10:04bigger than my hand at the Carver's
7:10:06feet.
7:10:07"This is all that's left of the Ador
7:10:09after I splattered him on the streets of
7:10:11Velaris."
7:10:12Those blue eyes flared with unholy
7:10:14delight. I hadn't even known we'd kept
7:10:17this fragment. It had been stored until
7:10:19now, precisely for this sort of thing.
7:10:22"So bloodthirsty, my new High Lady." The
7:10:26Carver purred, picking up the cracked
7:10:28bone and turning it over in those small,
7:10:30delicate hands. And then the Carver
7:10:33said,
7:10:34"I smell my sister on you,
7:10:36curse-breaker."
7:10:38My mouth went dry.
7:10:40His sister?
7:10:41"Did you steal from her? Did she weave a
7:10:44thread of your life into her loom?"
7:10:47The Weaver of the Wood. My heart
7:10:49thundered. No breathing could steady it.
7:10:51Cassian's hand tightened around mine.
7:10:54The Carver purred to Cassian. "If I tell
7:10:57you a secret, warrior heart, what will
7:10:59you give me?"
7:11:01Neither of us spoke. Carefully, we'd
7:11:04have to phrase and do this so carefully.
7:11:07The Carver stroked the shard of bone in
7:11:09his palm, attention fixed upon a
7:11:11stone-faced Cassian.
7:11:13"What if I tell you the rock and
7:11:15darkness and sea beyond whispered to me,
7:11:19"Lord of bloodshed." How they shuddered
7:11:22in fear on that island across the sea.
7:11:25How they trembled when she emerged. She
7:11:28took something, something precious. She
7:11:31ripped it out with her teeth.
7:11:34Cassian's golden-brown face had drained
7:11:36of color, his wings tucking in tight.
7:11:39"What did you wake that day in Hybern,
7:11:41prince of bastards?"
7:11:43My blood went cold. "What came out was
7:11:46not what went in."
7:11:48A rasping laugh as the Carver laid the
7:11:51shard of bone on the ground beside him.
7:11:53"How lovely she is, new as a fawn and
7:11:56yet ancient as the sea. How she calls to
7:11:59you, a queen as my sister once was,
7:12:03terrible and proud, beautiful as a
7:12:06winter sunrise."
7:12:08Rhysand warned me of the inmate's
7:12:10capacity to lie, to sell anything to get
7:12:13free.
7:12:14"Nesta."
7:12:16The Bone Carver murmured. "Nesta."
7:12:19I squeezed Cassian's hand. Enough. It
7:12:22was enough of this teasing and taunting.
7:12:25But he didn't look at me.
7:12:26"How the wind moans her name. Can you
7:12:29hear it, too?" "Nesta." "Nesta."
7:12:34"Nesta."
7:12:36I wasn't sure Cassian was breathing.
7:12:38"What did she do drowning in that
7:12:41ageless dark? What did she take?"
7:12:45It was the bite in that last word that
7:12:47snapped my tether of restraint. "If you
7:12:49wish to find out, perhaps you should
7:12:51stop talking long enough for us to
7:12:52explain."
7:12:54My voice seemed to shake Cassian free of
7:12:56whatever trance he'd been in. His
7:12:58breathing surged, tight and fast, and he
7:13:01scanned my face, apology in his eyes.
7:13:04The Carver chuckled. "I so rarely get
7:13:06company. Forgive me for wanting to make
7:13:09idle talk." He crossed an ankle over a
7:13:12foot and why have you sought my
7:13:14services?
7:13:16We obtained the book of breathings, I
7:13:18said casually. There are interesting
7:13:21spells inside. Codes within codes within
7:13:24codes.
7:13:25Someone we know cracked most of them.
7:13:27She is still looking for others. Spells
7:13:29that could
7:13:31send someone like her home. Others like
7:13:34her, too. The Carver's violet eyes
7:13:37flared bright as flame.
7:13:39I'm listening.
7:13:44Chapter 23
7:13:47War is upon us, I said to the Carver.
7:13:50Rumor suggests you have gifts that may
7:13:52be useful upon the battlefield.
7:13:55A smile at Cassian as if understanding
7:13:57why he'd joined me.
7:13:59In exchange for a prize. The Carver
7:14:02mused. Within reason, Cassian countered.
7:14:06The Carver surveyed his cell. And you
7:14:08think that I wish to go back,
7:14:12don't you?
7:14:13The Carver folded his legs beneath his
7:14:15small frame.
7:14:16Where we came from, I do not believe it
7:14:19is now anything more than dust drifting
7:14:21across a plane. There is no home to
7:14:24return to. Not one that I desire. For if
7:14:27he'd been here before even Amren had
7:14:29arrived, tens of thousands of years,
7:14:32longer perhaps, I shoved against the
7:14:35sinking sensation in my gut.
7:14:37Then perhaps improving your living
7:14:39conditions might entice you if this
7:14:42world is where you wish to be.
7:14:44This cell, cursebreaker, is where I wish
7:14:47to be.
7:14:48The Carver patted the dirt beside him.
7:14:51Do you think I let them trap me without
7:14:53good reason?
7:14:55Cassian's entire body seemed to shift,
7:14:57seemed to go aware and focused, ready to
7:15:00haul us out of there.
7:15:02The Carver traced three overlapping
7:15:04interlocked circles in the dirt. You
7:15:06have met my sister, my twin, the Weaver,
7:15:10as you now call her. I knew her as
7:15:13Stryga.
7:15:14She and our older brother, Koschei.
7:15:17How they delighted in this world when we
7:15:19fell into it. How those ancient Fae
7:15:21feared and worshipped them. Had I been
7:15:24braver, I might have bided my time,
7:15:26waited for their power to fade, for that
7:15:28long-ago Fae warrior to trick Stryga
7:15:31into diminishing her power and becoming
7:15:33confined to the middle.
7:15:35Koschei, too, confined and bound by his
7:15:38little lake on the continent. All before
7:15:41Prythian, before the land was carved up
7:15:44and any High Lord was crowned.
7:15:47Cassian and I waited, not daring to
7:15:50interrupt. Clever, that Fae warrior. Her
7:15:54bloodline is long gone now, though a
7:15:56trace still runs through some human
7:15:58line. He smiled, perhaps a bit sadly.
7:16:02No one remembers her name, but I do.
7:16:06She would have been my salvation, had I
7:16:09not made my choice long before she
7:16:11walked this Earth.
7:16:13I waited and waited and waited, picking
7:16:15apart the story he laid out like crumbs
7:16:17of bread.
7:16:19She could not kill them in the end. They
7:16:21were too strong. They could only be
7:16:23contained.
7:16:25The Carver wiped a hand through the
7:16:27circles he'd drawn, erasing them wholly.
7:16:30I knew that long before she ever trapped
7:16:32them, took it upon myself to find my way
7:16:35here.
7:16:37To spare the world from yourself?
7:16:39Cassian asked, brows narrowing.
7:16:42The Carver's eyes burned like the
7:16:43hottest flame. To hide from my siblings.
7:16:48I blinked. Why? They are death gods,
7:16:51girl, the Carver hissed. You are
7:16:54immortal, or long-lived enough to seem
7:16:57that way.
7:16:58But my siblings and I,
7:17:00we are different. And the two of them
7:17:03stronger, so much stronger than I ever
7:17:06was. My sister, she found a way to eat
7:17:09life itself, to stay young and beautiful
7:17:12forever thanks to the lives she steals.
7:17:16The weaving, the threads inside that
7:17:18house, the roof made of hair. I made a
7:17:21note to throw Rhysand the Sidra for
7:17:22sending me into that cottage.
7:17:24But the Carver himself
7:17:27"If they are death gods," I said, "then
7:17:30what are you?"
7:17:32"Death." He had asked me over and over
7:17:34about death, about what waited beyond
7:17:37it, what it felt like, where I had gone.
7:17:40I thought it mere curiosity, but
7:17:42that boy's face crinkled with amusement.
7:17:45My son's face. The vision of the future
7:17:48that had once been shown to me all those
7:17:50months ago as some sort of taunt or
7:17:53embodiment of what I hadn't dared yet
7:17:54admit to myself, what I was most
7:17:57uncertain of.
7:17:58And now
7:17:59now that young boy
7:18:01a different sort of taunt for the future
7:18:04I now stood to lose.
7:18:06"I am forgotten. That's what I am.
7:18:09And that is how I prefer to be."
7:18:12The Carver rested his head against the
7:18:13wall of rock behind him.
7:18:16"So you will find that I do not wish to
7:18:18leave, that I have no desire to remind
7:18:20my sister and brother that I am alive
7:18:23and in the world. Contained and
7:18:25diminished as they are, their influence
7:18:28remains considerable."
7:18:31"If Hybern wins this war," Cassian said
7:18:33roughly, "you might find the gates of
7:18:35this place blown wide open and your
7:18:38sister and brother unleashed from their
7:18:39own territories and interested in paying
7:18:42a visit."
7:18:43"Even Hybern is not that foolish." A
7:18:46satisfied huff of air.
7:18:48"I'm sure there are other inmates here
7:18:50who will find your offer
7:18:52tempting."
7:18:53My blood roared. "You will not even
7:18:55consider assisting us." I waved a hand
7:18:58to the cell. This is what you would
7:19:00prefer for eternity? If you knew my
7:19:03brother and sister, cursebreaker, you
7:19:06would find this a much wiser and more
7:19:07comfortable alternative.
7:19:10I opened my mouth, but Cassian squeezed
7:19:13my hand in warning. Enough. We'd said
7:19:16enough, revealed enough. Looking so
7:19:18desperate, it would help nothing.
7:19:21We should go, Cassian said to me, the
7:19:24very picture of unruffled calm.
7:19:26The delights of the human city await.
7:19:29We'd indeed be late if we didn't leave
7:19:31now. I threw a glare at the Carver by
7:19:33way of farewell, letting Cassian lead me
7:19:36toward the open cell door. You are going
7:19:39to the human city, the Carver said, not
7:19:42entirely a question. I don't see how
7:19:44that is any business of yours, I said
7:19:46over my shoulder. The Carver's beat of
7:19:49silence echoed around us, made us pause
7:19:51on the threshold.
7:19:53One last attempt, the Carver mused, eyes
7:19:57skating over us, to rally the entirety
7:19:59of the night court, I suppose.
7:20:02Again, it is none of your concern, I
7:20:05said coolly. The Carver smiled. You will
7:20:08be bargaining with him. A glance at the
7:20:10tattoo on my right hand. I wonder what
7:20:13Keir's asking price will be. A low
7:20:16laugh. Interesting.
7:20:18Cassian let out a long-suffering sigh.
7:20:21Out with it. The Bone Carver again fell
7:20:24silent, toying with the shard of the
7:20:26Ador's bone in the dirt beside him.
7:20:29The eddies of the cauldron swirl in
7:20:31strange ways, he murmured, more to
7:20:34himself than us. We're going, I said,
7:20:37making to turn again, hauling Cassian
7:20:39with me.
7:20:41My sister had a collection of mirrors in
7:20:43her black castle, the Carver said. We
7:20:46halted once more.
7:20:48She admired herself day and night in
7:20:51those mirrors, gloating over her youth
7:20:53and beauty.
7:20:55There was one mirror, the Uroboros, she
7:20:58called it. It was old even when we were
7:21:01young. A window to the world. All could
7:21:04be seen, all could be told through its
7:21:07dark surface.
7:21:08Kier possesses it, an heirloom of his
7:21:11household.
7:21:12Bring it to me.
7:21:14That is my prize. The Uroboros, and I am
7:21:17yours to wield, if you can find a way to
7:21:21free me.
7:21:22A hateful smile.
7:21:24I exchanged a glance with Cassian, and
7:21:26we both shrugged at the Carver.
7:21:28We'll see, was all I said before we
7:21:30walked out.
7:21:34Cassian and I sat on a boulder
7:21:36overlooking a silver stream, breathing
7:21:38in the chill mists. The prison loomed at
7:21:41our back, a dreadful weight blocking out
7:21:43the horizon.
7:21:45You said that you knew the Carver was an
7:21:47old god, I mused softly.
7:21:50Did you know he was a death god?
7:21:52Cassian's face was taut.
7:21:54I guessed. When I lifted a brow, he
7:21:57clarified, He carves deaths into bones,
7:22:00sees them, enjoys them. It wasn't hard
7:22:03to figure out.
7:22:05I considered.
7:22:06Was it you or Reese who suggested you
7:22:08come here with me?
7:22:10I wanted to come. But Reese, he guessed
7:22:13it, too.
7:22:14Because what we'd seen in Nesta's eyes
7:22:16that day,
7:22:18Like calls to like, I murmured. Cassian
7:22:22nodded tightly.
7:22:24I don't even think the Carver knows what
7:22:25Nesta is, but I wanted to see, just in
7:22:28case.
7:22:30Why?
7:22:31I want to help.
7:22:33It was answer enough.
7:22:34We fell into silence, the stream
7:22:36gurgling as it rushed by.
7:22:39Would you be frightened of her if Nesta
7:22:41was death,
7:22:43or if her power came from it?
7:22:46Cassian was quiet for a long moment. He
7:22:48said at last, "I'm a warrior. I've
7:22:51walked beside death my entire life. I
7:22:54would be more afraid for her to have
7:22:56that power, but not afraid of her."
7:22:59He considered and added after a
7:23:01heartbeat,
7:23:02"Nothing about Nesta could frighten me."
7:23:05I swallowed and squeezed his hand.
7:23:08"Thank you."
7:23:09I wasn't even sure why I said it, but he
7:23:11nodded all the same.
7:23:14I felt him before he appeared. A spark
7:23:16of star-kissed joy flaring through me
7:23:18right as Rhys stepped out of the air
7:23:20itself.
7:23:21"Well."
7:23:22Cassian hopped off the boulder extending
7:23:25a hand to help me down. "You're not
7:23:27going to like his asking price."
7:23:29Rhys held out both hands to winnow us
7:23:31back to Velaris.
7:23:33"If he wants the fancy dinner plates, he
7:23:34can have them."
7:23:36Neither Cassian nor I could muster a
7:23:38laugh as we both reached for Rhys's
7:23:40outstretched hands. "You better bring
7:23:42your bargaining skills tonight." was all
7:23:44Cassian muttered to my mate before we
7:23:46vanished into shadow.
7:23:52Chapter 24
7:23:55When we returned to the townhouse in the
7:23:56height of summer afternoon heat, Cassian
7:23:59and Azriel drew sticks for who would
7:24:01remain in Velaris that night.
7:24:03Both wanted to join us at the Hewn City,
7:24:05but someone had to guard the city, part
7:24:08of their long-held protocol. And someone
7:24:10had to guard Elain, though I certainly
7:24:12wasn't about to tell Lucien that.
7:24:15Cassian, swearing and pissy, got the
7:24:17short stick. And Azriel only clapped him
7:24:20on the shoulder before heading up to the
7:24:21house to prepare.
7:24:24I followed after him a few minutes
7:24:25later, leaving Cassian to tell Rhys the
7:24:28rest of what the Carver had said, what
7:24:30he wanted.
7:24:32There were two people I needed to see up
7:24:33at the house before we left. I should
7:24:36have checked in on Elain earlier, should
7:24:38have remembered that her would-have-been
7:24:40wedding was in a few days, but
7:24:42I cursed myself for forgetting it. And
7:24:45as for Lucien, it wouldn't hurt, I told
7:24:48myself, to keep tabs on where he was,
7:24:50how that conversation with Azriel had
7:24:52gone yesterday, make sure he remembered
7:24:55the rules we'd set.
7:24:57But 15 minutes later, I was trying not
7:24:59to wince as I walked down the halls of
7:25:01the House of Wind, grateful Azriel had
7:25:03gone ahead. I'd winnowed into the sky
7:25:06above the highest balcony, and since I
7:25:08figured now was as good a time as any to
7:25:10practice flying, I'd summoned wings
7:25:13and fallen 20 ft onto hard stone.
7:25:16A rallied wind kept the fall from
7:25:18cracking any bones, but both my knees
7:25:20and my pride were significantly bruised
7:25:22by my graceless tumble through the air.
7:25:25At least no one had witnessed it.
7:25:28My stiff, limping steps, at least, had
7:25:30eased into a smoother gait by the time I
7:25:32found Elain in the family library,
7:25:35still staring at the window, but she was
7:25:37out of her room.
7:25:39Nesta was reading in her usual chair,
7:25:41one eye on Elain, the other on the book
7:25:44spread in her lap. Only Nesta glanced my
7:25:47way as I slipped through the carved
7:25:48wooden doors.
7:25:50I murmured, "Hello." and shut the doors
7:25:53behind me.
7:25:54Elain didn't turn.
7:25:56She was wearing a pale pink gown that
7:25:58did little to compliment her sallow
7:25:59skin, her brown-gold hair hanging in
7:26:02loose, heavy ringlets down her thin
7:26:04back.
7:26:05"It's a fine day," I said to them.
7:26:08Nesta arched an elegant eyebrow.
7:26:11"Where's your menagerie of friends?"
7:26:13I leveled a steely look back at her.
7:26:16"Those friends have offered you shelter
7:26:18and comfort and training or whatever
7:26:21Amren was doing."
7:26:23"Are you ready for tonight?"
7:26:24"Yes."
7:26:26Nesta merely resumed reading the book in
7:26:27her lap, pure dismissal.
7:26:30I let out a little snort that I knew
7:26:32would make her see red and strode for
7:26:34Elain.
7:26:35Nesta monitored my every step, a panther
7:26:38readying to strike at the merest hint of
7:26:40danger.
7:26:41"What are you looking at?" I asked
7:26:43Elaine, keeping my voice soft, casual.
7:26:46Her face was wan, her lips bloodless,
7:26:49but they moved, barely, as she said,
7:26:52"I can see so very far now.
7:26:55All the way to the sea."
7:26:57Indeed, the sea beyond the Sidra was a
7:26:59distant sparkle.
7:27:01"It takes some getting used to.
7:27:04I can hear your heartbeat if I listen
7:27:06carefully.
7:27:08I can hear her heartbeat, too."
7:27:11"You can learn to drown out the sounds
7:27:13that bother you.
7:27:14I had, entirely on my own.
7:27:17I wondered if Nesta had, as well, or if
7:27:19they both suffered hearing each other's
7:27:21heartbeats day and night. I didn't look
7:27:23to my other sister to confirm it.
7:27:26Elaine's eyes at last slid to mine, the
7:27:28first time she'd done so.
7:27:31Even wasted away by grief and despair,
7:27:33Elaine's beauty was remarkable. Hers was
7:27:36a face that could bring kings to their
7:27:38knees,
7:27:39and yet there was no joy in it, no
7:27:41light, no life.
7:27:43She said,
7:27:45"I can hear the sea,
7:27:46even at night, even in my dreams.
7:27:50The crashing sea,
7:27:52and the screams of a bird made of fire."
7:27:55It was an effort not to glance to Nesta.
7:27:58Even the townhouse was too far to hear
7:27:59anything from the nearby coast, and as
7:28:02for some firebird?
7:28:04"There is a garden at my other house," I
7:28:07said. "I'd like for you to come tend it,
7:28:10if you're willing."
7:28:11Elaine only turned toward the sunny
7:28:13windows again, the light dancing in her
7:28:15hair.
7:28:16"Will I hear the earthworms writhing
7:28:18through the soil, or the stretching of
7:28:20roots?
7:28:21Will the bird of fire come to sit in the
7:28:23trees and watch me?"
7:28:26I wasn't sure if I should answer. It was
7:28:28an effort to keep from shaking,
7:28:30but I caught Nesta's eye, noting the
7:28:32glimmer of pain on my eldest sister's
7:28:34face before it was hidden beneath that
7:28:37cool mask.
7:28:39"There's a book I need you to help me
7:28:40find, Nesta." I said, giving a pointed
7:28:43stare to the stacks to my left.
7:28:46Far enough away for privacy, but close
7:28:48enough to remain nearby should Elain
7:28:50need anything, do anything.
7:28:53Something in my chest cracked as Nesta's
7:28:55eyes also went to the windows before
7:28:57Elain, to check, as I did, for whether
7:29:00they could be easily opened.
7:29:02Mercifully, they were permanently
7:29:04sealed, likely to protect against some
7:29:06careless fool forgetting to close them
7:29:08and ruining the books. Likely Cassian.
7:29:12Nesta wordlessly sat down her book and
7:29:14followed me into the slow labyrinth of
7:29:15stacks, both of us keeping an ear on the
7:29:18main sitting area.
7:29:20When we were far enough away, I threw up
7:29:22a shield of hard wind around us, keeping
7:29:24any sound inside.
7:29:26"How did you get her to leave her room?"
7:29:29"I didn't." Nesta said, leaning against
7:29:31a shelf and crossing her slim arms. "I
7:29:34found her in here. She wasn't in bed
7:29:37when I awoke." Nesta must have panicked
7:29:39upon finding her room empty.
7:29:41"Did she eat anything?" "No."
7:29:44"I managed to get her to drink some
7:29:45broth last night. She refused anything
7:29:48else. She's been talking in those half
7:29:50riddles all day."
7:29:52I dragged a hand through my hair,
7:29:54freeing strands from my braid.
7:29:57"Did anything happen to trigger" "I
7:29:59don't know." "I check on her every few
7:30:01hours." Nesta clenched her jaw.
7:30:04"I was gone for longer yesterday,
7:30:06though."
7:30:07While she trained with Amren, Rhys had
7:30:09informed me that by the end of it,
7:30:11Nesta's rudimentary shields were solid
7:30:13enough that Amren deemed my sister ready
7:30:15for tonight.
7:30:17But there, beneath that cool demeanor,
7:30:20guilt, panic.
7:30:22"I doubt anything happened." I said
7:30:24quickly. "Maybe it's just part of the
7:30:27recovery process, her adjustment to
7:30:29being Fae.
7:30:31Nesta didn't look convinced.
7:30:33Does she have powers like mine?
7:30:36And what exactly are those powers,
7:30:38Nesta?
7:30:40I don't know.
7:30:42I don't think so, unless this is the
7:30:44first sign of something manifesting.
7:30:46It was an effort not to add, if you'd
7:30:48talk about what went on in the Cauldron,
7:30:50perhaps we'd have a better understanding
7:30:52of it.
7:30:54Let's give her a day or two, see what
7:30:55happens, if she improves.
7:30:58Why not see now?
7:31:00Because we're going to the Hewn City in
7:31:01a few hours.
7:31:03And you don't seem inclined to want us
7:31:05shoving into your business, I told her
7:31:07as evenly as I could.
7:31:09I doubt Elain does, too.
7:31:11Nesta stared me down, not a flicker of
7:31:13emotion on her face, and gave a curt
7:31:15nod.
7:31:17Well,
7:31:18at least she left the room.
7:31:20And the chair.
7:31:22We exchanged a rare, calm glance.
7:31:25But then I said,
7:31:26"Why won't you train with Cassian?"
7:31:28Nesta's spine locked up. "Why is it only
7:31:31Cassian that I may train with? Why not
7:31:34the other one?"
7:31:35Azriel? "Him, or the blond who won't
7:31:38shut up."
7:31:39"If you're referring to Mor, and why
7:31:41must I train at all? I am no warrior,
7:31:44nor do I desire to be."
7:31:47It could make you strong. There are many
7:31:49types of strength beyond the ability to
7:31:51wield a blade and end lives. Amren told
7:31:54me that yesterday.
7:31:56You said you wanted our enemies dead.
7:31:59Why not kill them yourself?
7:32:01She inspected her nails.
7:32:03"Why bother when someone else can do it
7:32:05for me?"
7:32:07I avoided the urge to rub my temples.
7:32:09We're But the doors to the library
7:32:11opened, and I snapped my barrier of hard
7:32:14air down entirely at the thought of
7:32:16stalking footsteps, then their sudden
7:32:18halting.
7:32:20I gripped Nesta's arm to keep her still,
7:32:22just as Lucien's voice blurted, "You
7:32:26You left your room."
7:32:28Nesta bristled, teeth flashing. I
7:32:30gripped her harder and threw a new wall
7:32:32of air around us, holding her there.
7:32:35Weeks of cloistering Elain had done
7:32:37nothing to improve her state. Perhaps
7:32:39the half-riddles were proof of that. And
7:32:41even if Lucien was currently breaking
7:32:43the rules we had set,
7:32:45more steps. No doubt closer to where
7:32:48Elain stood at the window.
7:32:50"Is
7:32:52Is there anything I can get for you?"
7:32:54I'd never heard my friend's voice so
7:32:56soft, so tentative and concerned.
7:32:59Perhaps it made me the lowest sort of
7:33:01wretch, but I cast my mind toward them,
7:33:04toward him,
7:33:05and then I was in his body, his head.
7:33:08Too thin. She must not be eating at all.
7:33:12How can she even stand? The thoughts
7:33:15flowed through his head, one after
7:33:17another. His heart was a raging,
7:33:19thunderous beat, and he didn't dare move
7:33:21from his position a mere five feet away.
7:33:24She hadn't yet turned toward him, but
7:33:26the ravages of her fasting were evident
7:33:28enough. Touch her, smell her, taste her.
7:33:32The instincts were a running river. He
7:33:34fisted his hands at his sides.
7:33:36He hadn't expected her to be here. The
7:33:39other sister, the viper, was a
7:33:41possibility, but one he was willing to
7:33:43risk. Aside from talking to the Shadow
7:33:46Singer yesterday, which had been just
7:33:48about as unnerving as he'd expected,
7:33:50though Azriel seemed like a decent
7:33:52enough male, he'd been cooped up in this
7:33:54wind-blasted house for two days. The
7:33:57thought of another one had been enough
7:33:58to make him risk Rhysand's wrath.
7:34:01He just wanted a walk and a few books.
7:34:04It had been an age since he'd even had
7:34:06free time to read, let alone do so for
7:34:08pleasure.
7:34:10But there she was, his mate.
7:34:13She was nothing like Jesminda.
7:34:15Jesminda had been all laughter and
7:34:17mischief, too wild and free to be
7:34:20contained by the country life that she'd
7:34:21been born into.
7:34:23She had teased him, taunted him, seduced
7:34:26him so thoroughly that he hadn't wanted
7:34:28anything but her.
7:34:29She'd seen him not as a high lord's
7:34:31seventh son, but as a male. Had loved
7:34:34him without question, without
7:34:36hesitation. She had chosen him.
7:34:39Elaine had been thrown at him.
7:34:43He glanced toward the tea service spread
7:34:45on a low-lying table nearby. I'm going
7:34:47to assume that one of those cups belongs
7:34:50to your sister.
7:34:51Indeed, there was a discarded book in
7:34:53the viper's usual chair. Cauldron help
7:34:56the male who wound up shackled to her.
7:34:59Do you mind if I help myself to the
7:35:00other?
7:35:01He tried to sound casual, comfortable,
7:35:04even as his heart raced and raced, so
7:35:07swift he thought he might vomit on the
7:35:08very expensive, very old carpet. From
7:35:11Sangravah, if the patterns in Rhysand's
7:35:13eyes were any indication.
7:35:16Rhysand was many things, but he
7:35:18certainly had good taste.
7:35:20This entire place had been decorated
7:35:22with thought and elegance, with a
7:35:24penchant for comfort over stuffiness.
7:35:27He didn't want to admit he liked it,
7:35:29didn't want to admit that he found the
7:35:30city beautiful.
7:35:32That the circle of people who now
7:35:34claimed to be Feyre's new family,
7:35:36it was what, long ago, he'd once thought
7:35:39life at Tamlin's court would be.
7:35:42An ache like a blow to the chest went
7:35:44through him. But he crossed the rug,
7:35:46forced his hands to be steady while he
7:35:48poured himself a cup of tea, and sat in
7:35:50the chair opposite Nesta's vacated one.
7:35:54There's a plate of biscuits.
7:35:55Would you like one?
7:35:57He didn't expect her to answer, and he
7:35:59gave himself all of one more minute
7:36:01before he'd rise from this chair and
7:36:03leave, hopefully avoiding Nesta's
7:36:05return.
7:36:07But sunlight on gold caught his eye, and
7:36:09Elaine slowly turned from her vigil at
7:36:12the window.
7:36:13He had not seen her entire face since
7:36:15that day on Hybern.
7:36:17Then, it had been drawn and terrified.
7:36:20Then, utterly blank and numb, her hair
7:36:22plastered to her head, her lips blue
7:36:24with cold and shock.
7:36:26Looking at her now,
7:36:28she was pale, yes, the vacancy still
7:36:31glazing her features,
7:36:33but he couldn't breathe as she faced him
7:36:35fully. She was the most beautiful female
7:36:37he'd ever seen.
7:36:39Betrayal, queasy, and oily slid through
7:36:42his veins. He'd said the same to
7:36:44Jessamyn once.
7:36:45But even as shame washed through him,
7:36:47the words, the sense chanted, "Mine. You
7:36:51are mine, and I am yours. Mate."
7:36:55Her eyes were the brown of a fawn's
7:36:57coat, and he could have sworn something
7:36:59sparked in them as she met his gaze.
7:37:02"Who are you?"
7:37:04He knew without demanding clarification
7:37:05that she was aware of what he was to
7:37:07her.
7:37:09"I am Lucien, seventh son of the High
7:37:11Lord of the Autumn Court,
7:37:13and a whole lot of nothing."
7:37:15He told the Shadow Singer all he knew of
7:37:18his surviving brothers, of his father,
7:37:20his mother. He'd kept some details,
7:37:23irrelevant and utterly personal, to
7:37:25himself.
7:37:26Everything else, his father's closest
7:37:28allies, the most conniving courtiers and
7:37:31lords, he'd handed it over.
7:37:33Granted, it was dated by a few
7:37:35centuries, but in his time as emissary,
7:37:38from the information he'd gathered, not
7:37:40much had changed.
7:37:42They'd all acted the same under the
7:37:43mountain anyway. And after what had
7:37:45happened with his brothers a few days
7:37:47ago,
7:37:48there was no tinge of guilt when he told
7:37:50Azriel what he knew. None of what he
7:37:52felt when he looked toward the south,
7:37:54toward both of the courts he'd called
7:37:56home.
7:37:57For a long moment, Elaine's face did not
7:38:00shift, but those eyes seemed to focus a
7:38:02bit more.
7:38:04"Lucien," she said at last, and he
7:38:07clenched his teacup to keep from
7:38:08shuddering at the sound of his name on
7:38:10her mouth.
7:38:11From my sister's stories.
7:38:14Her friend?
7:38:15Yes.
7:38:17But Elaine blinked slowly.
7:38:19You were in Hybern.
7:38:21Yes.
7:38:22It was all he could say.
7:38:25You betrayed us.
7:38:27He wished she'd shoved him out the
7:38:28window behind her.
7:38:30It's
7:38:31It was a mistake.
7:38:33Her eyes went frank and cold.
7:38:36I was to be married in a few days.
7:38:38He fought against the bristling rage,
7:38:41the irrational urge to find the male
7:38:42who'd claimed her and shred him apart.
7:38:45The words were a rasp as he instead
7:38:47said,
7:38:48I know.
7:38:49I'm sorry.
7:38:51She did not love him, want him, need
7:38:54him, another male's bride, a mortal
7:38:57man's wife, or she would have been.
7:39:00She looked away toward the windows.
7:39:03I can hear your heart, she said quietly.
7:39:06He wasn't sure how to respond, so he
7:39:08said nothing and drained his tea even as
7:39:11it burned his mouth.
7:39:12When I sleep, she murmured,
7:39:15I can hear your heart beating through
7:39:17the stone.
7:39:18She angled her head as if the city view
7:39:20held some answer.
7:39:22Can you hear mine?
7:39:24He wasn't sure if she truly meant to
7:39:26address him, but he said, No, lady, I
7:39:30cannot.
7:39:31Her two thin shoulders seemed to curve
7:39:33inward.
7:39:35No one ever does.
7:39:37No one ever looked, not really.
7:39:39A bramble of words, her voice strained
7:39:42to a whisper.
7:39:43He did.
7:39:45He saw me.
7:39:46He will not now.
7:39:48Her thumb brushed the iron ring on her
7:39:50finger, another male's ring, another
7:39:53marker that she was claimed. It was
7:39:55enough. I had listened enough, learned
7:39:57enough. I pulled out of Lucien's mind.
7:40:01Nesta was gaping at me even as her face
7:40:03had leeched of color at every word
7:40:05uttered between them.
7:40:06"Have you ever gone into my No." I
7:40:09rasped. How she knew what I had done, I
7:40:12didn't want to ask. Not as I dropped the
7:40:14shield around us and headed for the
7:40:16sitting area.
7:40:18Lucien, no doubt having heard our steps,
7:40:20was flushed as he glanced between me and
7:40:22Nesta. No inkling whatsoever that I'd
7:40:24slid into his mind, rifled through it
7:40:27like a bandit in the night. I shoved
7:40:29down a mild nausea.
7:40:31My eldest sister merely said to him,
7:40:34"Get out."
7:40:35I flashed Nesta a glare, but Lucien
7:40:38rose.
7:40:39"I came for a book." "Well, find one and
7:40:42leave."
7:40:43Elaine only stared out the window,
7:40:45unaware or uncaring.
7:40:48Lucien didn't head for the stacks. He
7:40:50just went to the open doors. He paused
7:40:53right between them and said to me, to
7:40:55Nesta, "She needs fresh air." "We'll
7:40:58judge what she needs."
7:41:00I could have sworn his ruby gleamed like
7:41:02molten metal as his temper rose, but it
7:41:05faded, his russet eye fixing on me.
7:41:08"Take her to the sea. Take her to some
7:41:10garden, but get her out of this house
7:41:12for an hour or two."
7:41:14Then he walked away.
7:41:16I looked at my two sisters, cloistered
7:41:18up here, high above the world. "You're
7:41:21moving into the townhouse right now." I
7:41:23said to them. To Lucien, who paused in
7:41:26the dim hallway outside. Nesta, to my
7:41:29shock, did not object.
7:41:34Neither did Rhys when I sent my order
7:41:36down the bond, asking him, Cassian, and
7:41:38Azriel to help move them. No. My mate
7:41:42just promised to assign two bedrooms to
7:41:44my sisters down the hall, on the other
7:41:46side of the stairs, and a third for
7:41:48Lucien on our side of the hall, well
7:41:51away from Elaine's.
7:41:5330 minutes later, Azriel carried Elaine
7:41:55down, my sister silent and unresponsive
7:41:58in his arms.
7:42:00Nesta had looked ready to walk off the
7:42:01balcony rather than let Cassian, already
7:42:04dressed and armed for guarding the
7:42:05townhouse tonight, hold her. So, I
7:42:08nudged her toward Rhys, pushed Lucien
7:42:10toward Cassian, and flew myself back.
7:42:13Or tried to. Again.
7:42:16I soared for about half a minute,
7:42:18savoring the cleansing scream of the
7:42:20wind before my wings wobbled, my back
7:42:23strained, and the fall became unbearably
7:42:25deadly. I went out the rest of the way
7:42:28to the townhouse and adjusted vases and
7:42:30figurines in the sitting room while
7:42:32waiting for them.
7:42:34Azriel arrived first, no shadows to be
7:42:36seen. My sister, a pale golden mass in
7:42:39his arms.
7:42:40He too wore his Illyrian armor. Elaine's
7:42:43golden-brown hair snagging in some of
7:42:45the black scales across his chest and
7:42:47shoulders.
7:42:49He set her down gently on the foyer
7:42:50carpet, having carried her in through
7:42:52the front door.
7:42:54Elaine peered up at his patient, solemn
7:42:56face. Azriel smiled faintly.
7:42:59"Would you like me to show you the
7:43:01garden?"
7:43:02She seemed so small before him, so
7:43:04fragile compared to the scales of his
7:43:06fighting leathers, the breadth of his
7:43:08shoulders, the wings peaking over them.
7:43:11But Elaine did not balk from him, did
7:43:13not shy away as she nodded, just once.
7:43:17Azriel, graceful as any courtier,
7:43:19offered her an arm. I couldn't tell if
7:43:21she was looking at his blue siphon or at
7:43:23his scarred skin beneath as she
7:43:25breathed, "Beautiful."
7:43:28Color bloomed high on Azriel's
7:43:29golden-brown cheeks, but he inclined his
7:43:32head in thanks and led my sister toward
7:43:34the back doors into the garden, sunlight
7:43:36bathing them.
7:43:38A moment later, Nesta was stomping
7:43:40through the front door, her face a
7:43:42remarkable shade of green.
7:43:44"I need a toilet."
7:43:47I met Rhys's stare as he prowled in
7:43:49behind her, hands in his pockets.
7:43:52"What did you do? His brows shot up, but
7:43:55I wordlessly pointed Nesta toward the
7:43:57powder room beneath the stairs, and she
7:43:59vanished, slamming the door behind her.
7:44:02Me? Rhys leaned against the bottom post
7:44:04of the banister. She complained that I
7:44:07was flying deliberately slow. So, I went
7:44:10fast. Cassian and Lucien appeared,
7:44:13neither looking at the other, but
7:44:15Lucien's attention went right to the
7:44:16hallway toward the back, his nostrils
7:44:18flaring as he scented Elaine's direction
7:44:21and who she'd gone with. A low snarl
7:44:23slipped out of him. Relax, Rhys said.
7:44:27Azriel isn't the ravishing type. Lucien
7:44:30cut him a glare. Mercifully, or perhaps
7:44:33not, Nesta's retching filled the
7:44:35silence. Cassian glared at Rhys.
7:44:38What did you do?
7:44:39I asked him the same thing, I said,
7:44:42crossing my arms. He said he went fast.
7:44:46Nesta vomited again, then silence.
7:44:49Cassian sighed at the ceiling. She'll
7:44:51never fly again. The doorknob twisted,
7:44:54and we tried, or at least Cassian and I
7:44:56did, not to seem like we'd been
7:44:58listening to her. Nesta's face was still
7:45:01greenish-pale, but her eyes burned.
7:45:05There was no way of describing that
7:45:06burning, and even painting it might have
7:45:08failed.
7:45:09Her eyes remained the same blue-gray as
7:45:11my own, and yet
7:45:13molten ore was all I could think of,
7:45:16quicksilver set aflame.
7:45:18She advanced a step toward us, all her
7:45:20attention fixed on Rhys.
7:45:23Cassian casually stepped in her path,
7:45:25wings folded in tight, feet braced apart
7:45:27on the carpet, a fighting stance,
7:45:30casual, but his siphons glimmered. Do
7:45:33you know, Cassian drawled to her, that
7:45:36the last time I got into a brawl in this
7:45:38house, I was kicked out for a month?
7:45:40Nesta's burning gaze slid to him, still
7:45:43outraged, but hinted with incredulity.
7:45:46He just went on. It was Amren's fault,
7:45:49of course, but no one believed me. And
7:45:51no one dared banish her.
7:45:53She blinked slowly. But the burning
7:45:56molten gaze became mortal, or as mortal
7:45:59as one of us could be.
7:46:00Until Lucien breathed, "What are you?"
7:46:04Cassian didn't seem to dare take his
7:46:06focus off Nesta, but my sister slowly
7:46:09looked at Lucien. "I made it give
7:46:11something back." She said with
7:46:13terrifying quiet.
7:46:15"The Cauldron." The hairs along my arms
7:46:18rose. Nesta's gaze flicked to the
7:46:20carpet, then to a spot on the wall.
7:46:23"I wish to go to my room."
7:46:25It took a moment to realize she'd spoken
7:46:27to me. I cleared my throat.
7:46:29"Up the stairs, on your right. Second
7:46:31door, or the third, whichever suits you.
7:46:35The other is for Elain.
7:46:37We need to leave in" I squinted at the
7:46:39clock in the sitting room, "two hours."
7:46:42A shallow nod was her only
7:46:44acknowledgement. "And thanks."
7:46:46We watched as she headed up the stairs,
7:46:48her lavender gown trailing after her.
7:46:51One slender hand braced on the rail.
7:46:53"I'm sorry." Rhys called up after her.
7:46:57Her hand tightened on the rail, the
7:46:59whites of her knuckles poking through
7:47:00her pale skin. But she didn't say
7:47:02anything as she continued on.
7:47:05"Is that sort of thing even possible?"
7:47:07Cassian murmured when the door to her
7:47:09room had shut. "For someone to take from
7:47:12the Cauldron's essence?"
7:47:14"It would seem so." Rhys mused, then
7:47:17said to Lucien,
7:47:18"The flame in her eyes was not of your
7:47:20usual sort, I take it." Lucien shook his
7:47:23head. "No. It spoke to nothing in my own
7:47:27arsenal. That was ice so cold it burned.
7:47:31Ice, and yet fluid like flame, or flame
7:47:35made of ice."
7:47:37"I think it's death." I said quietly.
7:47:40I held Rhys's gaze, as if it were again
7:47:43the tether that had kept me in this
7:47:44world.
7:47:45I think the power is death, death made
7:47:48flesh, or whatever power the Cauldron
7:47:51holds over such things. That's why the
7:47:53Carver heard it, heard about her.
7:47:56"Mother above," Lucien said, dragging a
7:47:59hand through his hair.
7:48:01Cassian gave him a solemn nod.
7:48:03But Rhys rubbed his jaw, weighing,
7:48:05thinking. Then he said [clears throat]
7:48:07simply, "Only Nesta would not just
7:48:10conquer death, but pillage it."
7:48:12No wonder she didn't wish to speak to
7:48:14anyone about it, didn't wish to bear
7:48:16witness on our behalf.
7:48:18It had been mere seconds for us while
7:48:20she'd gone under. I had never asked
7:48:22either of my sisters how long it had
7:48:24been for them inside that Cauldron.
7:48:29"Azriel knows you're watching," Rhys
7:48:31drawled from where he stood before the
7:48:33mirror in our bedroom, adjusting the
7:48:35lapels of his black jacket.
7:48:38The townhouse was a quiet flurry of
7:48:40activity as we prepared to leave. Mor
7:48:42and Amren had arrived half an hour ago,
7:48:45the former heading for the sitting room,
7:48:47the latter bearing a dress for my
7:48:48sister.
7:48:50I didn't dare ask Amren to see what
7:48:51she'd selected for Nesta.
7:48:54"Training," Amren had said days ago.
7:48:57There were magical objects in the Court
7:48:59of Nightmares that my sister could study
7:49:01tonight while we were occupied with
7:49:03Keir.
7:49:04I wondered if the Ouroboros was one of
7:49:06them, and made a note to ask Amren what
7:49:08she knew of the mirror the Carver so
7:49:10badly desired, which I'd somehow have to
7:49:12convince Keir to part with tonight.
7:49:15Lucien had offered to make himself
7:49:17useful while we were gone by reading
7:49:19through some of the texts now piled on
7:49:21the tables throughout the sitting room.
7:49:23Amren had only grunted at the offer,
7:49:25which I told Lucien amounted to a yes.
7:49:28Cassian was already on the roof,
7:49:30casually sharpening his blades.
7:49:33I'd asked him if nine swords were really
7:49:35necessary, and he merely told me that it
7:49:37didn't hurt to be prepared, and that if
7:49:40I had enough time to question him, then
7:49:42I should have enough time to do another
7:49:43workout. I quickly laughed, throwing a
7:49:46vulgar gesture his way.
7:49:49My hair still damp from the bath I'd
7:49:51just taken, I slid my heavy earrings
7:49:53through my lobes and peered out our
7:49:55bedroom window, monitoring the garden
7:49:58below.
7:49:59Elaine sat silently at one of the
7:50:01wrought iron tables, a cup of tea before
7:50:04her.
7:50:05Azriel was sprawled on the chaise longue
7:50:07across the gray stones, sunning his
7:50:09wings and reading what looked to be a
7:50:10stack of reports, likely information on
7:50:13the Autumn Court that he planned to
7:50:15present to Rhys once he'd sorted through
7:50:17it all.
7:50:18Already dressed for the Hewn City, the
7:50:20brutal beautiful armor so at odds with
7:50:23the lovely garden, and my sister sitting
7:50:25within it.
7:50:27"Why not make them mates?" I mused. "Why
7:50:30Lucien?"
7:50:31I'd have to keep that question from
7:50:33Lucien.
7:50:34"I'm serious."
7:50:36I turned toward him and crossed my arms.
7:50:38"What decides it? Who decides it?"
7:50:42Rhys straightened his lapels before
7:50:44plucking an invisible piece of lint from
7:50:45them. "Fate, the Mother, the Cauldron's
7:50:48swirling eddies." "Rhys."
7:50:51He watched me in the reflection of the
7:50:53mirror as I strode for my armoire,
7:50:55flinging open the doors to yank out the
7:50:57dress I'd selected. Scraps of shimmering
7:51:00black, a slightly more modest version of
7:51:02what I'd worn to the Court of Nightmares
7:51:04months ago. "You said your mother and
7:51:06father were wrong for each other. Tamlin
7:51:09said his own parents were wrong for each
7:51:11other. I peeled off my dressing robe, so
7:51:14it can't be a perfect system of
7:51:15matching.
7:51:16What if" I jerked my chin toward the
7:51:19window, "to my sister and the Shadow
7:51:21Singer in the garden?
7:51:23That is what she needs. Is there no free
7:51:26will?
7:51:27What if Lucien wishes the union, but she
7:51:29doesn't?"
7:51:30"A mating bond can be rejected," Rhys
7:51:33said mildly, eyes flickering in the
7:51:35mirror as he drank in every inch of bare
7:51:37skin I had on display.
7:51:40"There is choice, and sometimes, yes,
7:51:43the bond picks poorly.
7:51:45Sometimes the bond is nothing more than
7:51:47some preordained guesswork at who will
7:51:50provide the strongest offspring. At its
7:51:52basest level, it's perhaps only that.
7:51:55Some natural function, not an indication
7:51:58of true paired souls."
7:52:00A smile at me, at the rareness, perhaps,
7:52:03of what we had.
7:52:05"Even so," Rhys went on, "there will
7:52:07always be a tug. For the females, it is
7:52:11usually easier to ignore, but the males,
7:52:14it can drive them mad.
7:52:16It is their burden to fight through, but
7:52:19some believe they are entitled to the
7:52:20female. Even after the bond is rejected,
7:52:23they see her as belonging to them.
7:52:26Sometimes they return to challenge the
7:52:27male she chooses for herself. Sometimes
7:52:30it ends in death.
7:52:32It is savage, and it is ugly, and it
7:52:34mercifully does not happen often, but
7:52:37many mated pairs will try to make it
7:52:39work, believing the Cauldron selected
7:52:41them for a reason. Only years later will
7:52:44they realize that perhaps the pairing
7:52:46was not ideal in spirit." I scrounged up
7:52:49the jeweled dark belt from an armoire
7:52:51drawer and slung it low over my hips.
7:52:55"So, you're saying she could walk away,
7:52:58and Lucien would have free rein to kill
7:53:00whoever she chooses to be with?"
7:53:02Rhys turned from the mirror at last, his
7:53:05dark clothes pristine, cut perfectly to
7:53:07his body. No wings tonight.
7:53:10"Not free rein, not in my lands.
7:53:14It has been illegal in our territory for
7:53:15a long, long time for males to do that,
7:53:18even before I was born.
7:53:20Other courts? No.
7:53:22On the continent, there are territories
7:53:25that believe the females literally
7:53:26belong to their mate, but not here.
7:53:30Elaine would have our full protection if
7:53:31she rejects the bond, but it will still
7:53:34be a bond, however weakened, that will
7:53:36trail her for the rest of her existence.
7:53:40Do you think she and Lucien match well?
7:53:42I pulled out a pair of sandals that
7:53:44laced up my bare thighs and jammed my
7:53:46feet into them before beginning work on
7:53:48the bindings. You know them better than
7:53:50I do, but I will say that Lucien is
7:53:53loyal, fiercely so.
7:53:56So is Azriel. Azriel, Rhys said, has
7:53:59been preoccupied with the same female
7:54:01for the past 500 years. Wouldn't the
7:54:04mating bond have snapped into place for
7:54:06them if it exists? Rhys's eyes
7:54:09shuttered. I think that is a question
7:54:11Azriel has been asking himself every day
7:54:13since he met Mor.
7:54:15He sighed as I finished one foot and
7:54:17started on the other.
7:54:19Am I allowed to request that you not
7:54:21play matchmaker? Let them sort it out.
7:54:24I rose, bracing my hands on my hips. I
7:54:27would never meddle in someone else's
7:54:29affairs.
7:54:30He only raised a brow in silent
7:54:32challenge, and I knew precisely what he
7:54:34referred to.
7:54:35My gut tightened as I took a seat at the
7:54:38vanity and began braiding my hair into a
7:54:40coronet atop my head. Perhaps I was a
7:54:42coward for not being able to ask it
7:54:44aloud, but I set down the bond.
7:54:48Was it a violation going into Lucien's
7:54:50mind like that? I can't answer that for
7:54:53you. Rhys came over and handed me a
7:54:55hairpin. I slid it into a section of
7:54:58braid.
7:54:59I needed to be sure that he wasn't about
7:55:01to try to grab her, to sell us out.
7:55:04He handed me another.
7:55:06And did you get an answer to that?
7:55:08We worked in unison, pinning my hair
7:55:10into place. I think so.
7:55:13It wasn't just about what he thought, it
7:55:15was the
7:55:16feeling. I sensed no ill will, no
7:55:19conniving, only concern for her and
7:55:22sorrow,
7:55:24longing.
7:55:25I shook my head. Do I tell him what I
7:55:28did? Reese pinned a hard-to-reach
7:55:30section of my hair.
7:55:32You have to deem whether the cost is
7:55:34worth assuaging your guilt.
7:55:36The cost being Lucien's tentative trust
7:55:38in me, this place.
7:55:41I crossed a line. But you did it to
7:55:44ensure the safety of people you love. I
7:55:46didn't realize
7:55:48I trailed off, shaking my head again. He
7:55:51squeezed my shoulder.
7:55:53Didn't realize what? I shrugged,
7:55:55slouching on the cushioned stool.
7:55:58That it'd be so complicated. My face
7:56:01warmed. I know that sounds terribly
7:56:03naive. It's always complicated, and it
7:56:06never gets easier, no matter how many
7:56:08centuries I've been doing it. I pushed
7:56:10around the extra hairpins on the vanity.
7:56:13It's the second time I've gone into his
7:56:15mind. Then say it's the last, and be
7:56:18done with it.
7:56:19I blinked, lifting my head. I'd painted
7:56:23my lips in a shade of red so dark it was
7:56:25nearly black, and they now pressed into
7:56:27a thin line. He clarified, "What's done
7:56:30is done. Agonizing over it won't change
7:56:33anything. You realized it was a line you
7:56:35didn't like crossing, and so you won't
7:56:37make that mistake again."
7:56:39I shifted in my seat. Would you have
7:56:42done it? Reese considered. Yes, and I
7:56:46would have felt just as guilty
7:56:47afterward. Hearing that settled
7:56:50something deep down. I nodded once,
7:56:53twice.
7:56:54"If you want to make yourself feel a
7:56:56little better," he added, "Lucien did
7:56:59technically violate the rules we set, so
7:57:01you were entitled to look into his mind,
7:57:03if only to ensure the safety of your
7:57:05sister. He crossed the line first." That
7:57:09thing deep in me eased a bit more.
7:57:11You're right.
7:57:13And it was done.
7:57:14I watched Reese in the mirror as a dark
7:57:16crown appeared in his hands, the one of
7:57:19raven's feathers that I'd seen him wear,
7:57:21or its feminine twin, a tiara, which he
7:57:25gently, reverently set before the braid
7:57:28we'd pinned into place atop my head. The
7:57:30original crown, it appeared atop Rhys's
7:57:33head a moment later.
7:57:35Together, we stared at our reflection,
7:57:37lord and lady night, "Ready to be
7:57:40wicked." He purred in my ear.
7:57:43My toes curled at the caress in that
7:57:45voice, at the memory of the last time
7:57:47we'd gone to the Court of Nightmares,
7:57:49how I'd sat in his lap, where his
7:57:52fingers had drifted. I rose from the
7:57:54bench, facing him fully. His hands
7:57:57skimmed the bare skin along my ribs,
7:57:59between my breasts, down the outside of
7:58:01my thighs. Oh, he remembered, too.
7:58:05"This time," I breathed, kissing the
7:58:08tendril of tattoo that peeked just above
7:58:10the collar of Rhys's black jacket,
7:58:13"I get to make care back."
7:58:19Chapter 25
7:58:22Amren hadn't dressed Nesta in cobwebs
7:58:24and stardust, as Mor and I were clothed,
7:58:27and she hadn't dressed Nesta in her own
7:58:28style of loose pants and a cropped
7:58:30blouse.
7:58:31She had kept it simple, brutal.
7:58:34A dress of impenetrable black flowed to
7:58:36the dark marble floors of the the bodice
7:58:38and sleeves,
7:58:42its neckline skimming the base of her
7:58:44pale throat. Nesta's hair had been swept
7:58:46into a simple style to reveal the planes
7:58:49of her face, the savage clarity of her
7:58:51eyes, as she took in the assembled
7:58:54crowd, the towering carved pillars and
7:58:56the scaled beasts twined around them,
7:58:59the mighty dais and the throne atop it,
7:59:02and did not balk.
7:59:04Indeed, Nesta's chin only lifted with
7:59:06each step we took toward that dais.
7:59:09One throne, I realized, that mighty
7:59:12throne of those twinned scaly beasts.
7:59:15Rhys realized it, too. Planned for it.
7:59:19My sister and the others peeled away at
7:59:20the foot of the dais, taking flanking
7:59:23positions at its base. No fear, no joy,
7:59:26no light in their faces.
7:59:28Azriel, at Mor's side, looked
7:59:30murderously calm as he surveyed those
7:59:32gathered. As he beheld Keir, waiting
7:59:35beside a golden-haired woman who had to
7:59:37be Mor's mother, sneering at us.
7:59:40"Promise them nothing." Mor had warned
7:59:42me.
7:59:44Rhys held out a hand for me to ascend
7:59:46the dais steps. I kept my head high,
7:59:48back straight, as I gripped his fingers
7:59:51and strode up the few stairs, toward
7:59:53that solitary throne.
7:59:55Rhys only winked as he gracefully
7:59:57escorted me right into that throne, the
7:59:59movement as easy and smooth as a dance.
8:00:03The crowd murmured as I sat, the black
8:00:05stone bitingly cold against my bare
8:00:07thighs.
8:00:08They outright gasped as Rhys simply
8:00:11perched on the arm of the throne,
8:00:12smirked at me, and said to the court of
8:00:15nightmares,
8:00:16"Bow."
8:00:18For they had not. And with me seated on
8:00:20that throne, their faces were still a
8:00:23mixture of shock and disdain as they all
8:00:25dropped to their knees.
8:00:27I avoided looking at Nesta while she had
8:00:29no choice but to follow suit.
8:00:31But I made myself look at Keir, at the
8:00:33female beside him, at anyone who dared
8:00:36meet my gaze. Made myself remember what
8:00:39they had done to Mor, now bowing with a
8:00:41grin on her face, when she was barely
8:00:43more than a child. Some of the court
8:00:46averted their eyes. "I will interpret
8:00:48the lack of two thrones to be due to the
8:00:50fact that this visit came upon you
8:00:52quickly." Rhys said with lethal calm.
8:00:55"And I will let you all escape without
8:00:57having your skin flayed from your bones
8:01:00as my mating gift to you, our loyal
8:01:03subjects." He added, smiling faintly.
8:01:07I traced a finger over the scaly coil of
8:01:09one of the beasts that made up the arms
8:01:11of the throne.
8:01:12Our court, part of it.
8:01:15And we needed them to fight with us, to
8:01:17agree to it tonight.
8:01:19The mouth I'd painted that dark, dark
8:01:22red parted into a lazy smile.
8:01:24Tendrils of power snaked toward the
8:01:26dais, but didn't dare venture past the
8:01:28first step. Testing me, what power I
8:01:32might have. But not getting close enough
8:01:34to offend Rhysand.
8:01:36I let them creep closer, sniffing around
8:01:39as I said to Rhys, "To the throne room.
8:01:41Surely, my love, they would like to
8:01:43stand now."
8:01:45Rhys smiled down at me, then at the
8:01:47crowd.
8:01:48"Rise."
8:01:49They did, and some of those tendrils of
8:01:52power dared climb up the first step. I
8:01:55pounced. Three gasps choked through the
8:01:57murmuring room as I slammed talon-sharp
8:02:00magic down upon those two curious
8:02:02powers, dug in deep and hard. A cat with
8:02:05a bird under its paw, several of them.
8:02:08"Do you wish to have this back?" I asked
8:02:11quietly to no one in particular.
8:02:14Near the foot of the dais, Keir was
8:02:15scowling over a shoulder, his silver
8:02:18circlet glinting atop his golden hair.
8:02:21Someone whimpered in the back of the
8:02:22room. "Don't you know," Rhys purred to
8:02:25the crowd, "that it's not polite to
8:02:27touch a lady without her permission?"
8:02:30In answer, I sank those dark talons in
8:02:32further, the magic of whoever had dared
8:02:35try to test me thrashing and buckling.
8:02:38"Play nice," I crooned to the crowd, and
8:02:40let go. Three separate flurries of
8:02:43motion warred for my attention. Someone
8:02:45had winnowed outright, fleeing. Another
8:02:48had fainted. And a third was clinging to
8:02:50whoever stood beside them, trembling. I
8:02:53marked all their faces.
8:02:55Amren and Nesta approached the foot of
8:02:57the dais. My sister was staring as if
8:03:00she'd never seen me before.
8:03:02I didn't dare break my mask of bemused
8:03:04coolness, didn't dare ask if Nesta's
8:03:06shields were holding up, if someone had
8:03:08just tried to test her as well.
8:03:11Nesta's own imperious face yielded
8:03:13nothing.
8:03:14Amren bowed her head to Rhys, to me.
8:03:18By your leave, High Lord.
8:03:20Rhys waved an idle hand. Go. Enjoy
8:03:23yourselves. He jerked his chin to the
8:03:25watching crowd. Food and music, now.
8:03:29He was obeyed instantly.
8:03:32My sister and Amren vanished before the
8:03:34crowd could begin milling about,
8:03:36striding right through those towering
8:03:38doors and into the gloom. To go play
8:03:40with some of the magical trove kept
8:03:42here, to give Nesta some practice for
8:03:45whenever Amren figured out how to fix
8:03:46the wall.
8:03:48A few heads turned in their direction,
8:03:50then quickly looked away as Amren
8:03:52noticed them, let some of the monster
8:03:54inside show.
8:03:56We still had not told her of the Bone
8:03:58Carver, of the prison visit.
8:04:00Something a bit like guilt coiled in my
8:04:02stomach. Though I supposed I had to get
8:04:05used to it, as Rhys curled a finger
8:04:07toward Keir and said, "The council room.
8:04:1010 minutes."
8:04:12Keir's eyes narrowed at the order, the
8:04:14female beside him keeping her head down,
8:04:16the portrait of subservience, what Mor
8:04:19was supposed to have been.
8:04:21My friend was indeed watching her
8:04:23parents, cold indifference on her face.
8:04:26Azriel kept a step away, monitoring
8:04:28everything.
8:04:30I didn't let myself look too interested,
8:04:32too worried, as Rhys offered me a hand
8:04:35and we rose from the throne and went to
8:04:37talk of war.
8:04:41The council chamber of the Hewn City was
8:04:43nearly as large as the throne room. It
8:04:46was carved from the same dark rock, its
8:04:48pillars fashioned after those entangled
8:04:50beasts.
8:04:51Far below the high-domed ceiling, a
8:04:54mammoth table of black glass split the
8:04:56room in two like a lightning strike, its
8:04:58corners left long and jagged, sharp as a
8:05:01razor.
8:05:03Rhys claimed a seat at the head of the
8:05:04table. I took the one at the opposite
8:05:06end. Azriel and Mor found seats on one
8:05:09side, and Keir settled into the seat on
8:05:12the other. A chair beside him sat empty.
8:05:15Rhys leaned back in his dark chair,
8:05:17swirling the wine that had been poured
8:05:19by a stone-faced servant a moment
8:05:21before.
8:05:22It had been an effort not to thank the
8:05:24male who'd filled my goblet, but here I
8:05:27did not thank anyone. Here, I took what
8:05:30was mine and offered no gratitude or
8:05:32apologies for it. "I know why you are
8:05:35here," Keir said without any sort of
8:05:38preamble.
8:05:39"Oh?" Rhys's eyebrow arched beautifully.
8:05:42Keir surveyed us, distaste lingering on
8:05:45his handsome face.
8:05:47"Hybern is swarming. Your legions are
8:05:50sneering at Azriel, at the Illyrians he
8:05:52represented. Are gathering."
8:05:55Keir interlaced his long fingers and set
8:05:57them upon the dark glass.
8:05:59"You mean to ask for my Darkbringers to
8:06:01join your army?"
8:06:03Rhys sipped from his wine.
8:06:05"Well, at least you've spared me the
8:06:07effort of dancing around the subject."
8:06:10Keir held his gaze without blinking.
8:06:12"I will confess that I find myself
8:06:15sympathetic to Hybern's cause."
8:06:19Mor shifted slightly in her seat. Azriel
8:06:21just pinned that icy, all-seeing stare
8:06:24on Keir. "You would not be the only
8:06:26one," Rhys countered coolly. Keir
8:06:29frowned up at the obsidian chandelier
8:06:31fashioned after a wreath of
8:06:33night-blooming flowers, the center of
8:06:35each a twinkling silver faylight. "There
8:06:38are many similarities between Hybern's
8:06:40people and my own. Both of us trapped,
8:06:44stagnant."
8:06:45"Last I checked," Mor cut in, "you have
8:06:48been free to do as you wish for
8:06:49centuries. Longer."
8:06:52Keir didn't so much as look at her,
8:06:54earning a flicker of rage from Azriel at
8:06:56the dismissal.
8:06:57Ah, but are we free here? Not even the
8:07:01entirety of this mountain belongs to us,
8:07:04not with your palace atop it.
8:07:07All of this belongs to me, I'll remind
8:07:09you, Rhys said wryly. It's that
8:07:11mentality that allows me to find
8:07:13Hybern's stifled people to be
8:07:16kindred spirits.
8:07:18You want the palace upstairs, Keir, then
8:07:21it's yours. Rhys crossed his legs. I
8:07:24didn't know you were lusting after it
8:07:25for so long.
8:07:27Keir's answering smile was near
8:07:28serpentine.
8:07:30You must need my army rather
8:07:32desperately, Rhys said.
8:07:35Again, that hateful glance at Azriel.
8:07:37Are the overgrown bats not up to snuff
8:07:40anymore?
8:07:41Come train with them, Azriel said
8:07:43softly, and you'll learn for yourself.
8:07:47In his centuries of miserable existence,
8:07:49Keir had certainly mastered the art of
8:07:51sneering. And the way he sneered at
8:07:53Azriel,
8:07:55Mor's teeth flashed in the dim light. It
8:07:57was an effort to keep myself from doing
8:07:59the same.
8:08:01I have no doubt, Rhys said, the portrait
8:08:03of glorious boredom, that you've already
8:08:06decided upon your asking price.
8:08:09Keir peered down the table to me, looked
8:08:12his fill as I held his stare.
8:08:14I did.
8:08:16My stomach turned at that gaze. The
8:08:18words, dark power, rumbled through the
8:08:20chamber, setting the onyx chandelier
8:08:23tinkling.
8:08:24Tread carefully, Keir.
8:08:27Keir only smiled at me, then at Rhys.
8:08:30Mor had gone utterly still.
8:08:32What would you give me for a shot at
8:08:34this war? Rhys said. You [ __ ] yourself
8:08:37to Amarantha, but what about your mate?
8:08:41He had not forgotten how we'd treated
8:08:43him, how we'd humiliated him months ago.
8:08:46And Rhys,
8:08:48there was only eternal, unforgiving
8:08:50death in his face in the darkness
8:08:52gathering behind his chair. The bargain
8:08:54our ancestors struck grants you the
8:08:56right to choose how and when your army
8:08:59assists my own, but it does not grant
8:09:01you the right to keep your life, Kier,
8:09:04when I grow tired of your existence.
8:09:07As if in answer, invisible claws gouged
8:09:09deep marks in the table, the glass
8:09:12shrieking. I flinched. Kier blinked at
8:09:15the lines now inches from him.
8:09:17But I thought you might be hesitant to
8:09:20assist me, Rhys went on.
8:09:23I'd never seen him so calm. Not calm,
8:09:25but filled with icy rage. The sword I
8:09:29sometimes glimpsed in Azriel's eyes.
8:09:32Rhys snapped his fingers and said to no
8:09:34one in particular,
8:09:35"Bring him in."
8:09:37The doors opened on a phantom wind.
8:09:40I didn't know where to look as a servant
8:09:42escorted in the tall male figure.
8:09:45At Moore, whose face went white dread.
8:09:47At Azriel, who reached for his dagger,
8:09:50Truth-Teller, his every breath alert,
8:09:52focused, but unsurprised. Not a hint of
8:09:55shock. Or at Eris, heir to the Autumn
8:09:58Court, as he strolled into the room.
8:10:04>> I'd like to interrupt with a 1-minute
8:10:06advertisement. You can fast forward
8:10:08through it if you wish.
8:10:43>> Kev.
8:10:47>> [screaming]
8:11:02[screaming]
8:11:17>> Chapter 26.
8:11:20That's who the final empty seat was for.
8:11:23And Rhys,
8:11:24he remained sprawled in his chair,
8:11:26sipping from his wine.
8:11:28"Welcome back, Eris." He drawled. "It's
8:11:30been what, five centuries since you last
8:11:33set foot in here?"
8:11:34Mor slid her eyes toward Rhys. Betrayal
8:11:38and hurt. That was hurt flashing there.
8:11:41For not warning us, for this surprise.
8:11:46I wondered if I schooled my features
8:11:47with any more success than my friend, as
8:11:50Eris claimed the vacant seat at the
8:11:51table, not bothering to so much as nod
8:11:54to a weary-eyed Keir. "It has indeed
8:11:57been a while."
8:11:58He'd healed since that day on the ice.
8:12:01Not a sign of the gut wound Cassian had
8:12:03given him.
8:12:04His red hair was unbound, a silken drape
8:12:07over his well-tailored cobalt jacket.
8:12:10"What is he doing here?" I speared down
8:12:12the bond, not bothering to hide any of
8:12:14what coursed through me. "Making sure
8:12:17Keir agrees to help." was all Rhys said,
8:12:20the words tight and clipped, restrained,
8:12:23as if he were still holding the full
8:12:24might of his rage in check. Shadows
8:12:27curled around Azriel's shoulders,
8:12:29whispering in his ears he stared down
8:12:31Eris.
8:12:32"You once wanted to build ties to
8:12:34Autumn, Keir." said Rhys, setting down
8:12:37his goblet of wine. Well, here's your
8:12:40chance. Eris is willing to offer you a
8:12:42formal alliance in exchange for your
8:12:45services in this war.
8:12:47How the hell did you get him to agree to
8:12:49that?
8:12:50Rhys didn't answer. Rhysand. Keir leaned
8:12:53back in his chair. It is not enough.
8:12:57Eris snorted, pouring himself a goblet
8:12:59of wine from the decanter in the center
8:13:01of the table. I'd forgotten why I was so
8:13:03relieved when our bargain fell apart the
8:13:05last time. Rhys shot him a warning look.
8:13:08Eris just drank deeply.
8:13:11What is it that you want then, Keir?
8:13:13Rhys purred. I had the feeling if Keir
8:13:16suggested me again, he'd wind up
8:13:18splattered on the wall.
8:13:20But Keir must have known too and said
8:13:22simply to Rhysand,
8:13:24I want out. I want space. I want my
8:13:27people to be free of this mountain.
8:13:30You have every comfort, I finally said,
8:13:33and yet it is not enough.
8:13:36Keir ignored me as well, as I'm sure he
8:13:38ignored most women in his life.
8:13:41You have been keeping secrets, High
8:13:43Lord, Keir said with a hateful smile,
8:13:46interlacing his hands and resting them
8:13:48on the mauled table, right atop the
8:13:50nearest deep gouge. I always wondered
8:13:53where all of you went when you weren't
8:13:55here. Hybern answered the question at
8:13:58last, thanks to that attack on What is
8:14:01its name? Velaris? Yes. On Velaris, the
8:14:06city of starlight. Mor went utterly
8:14:09still.
8:14:10I want access to the city, Keir said,
8:14:13for me and my court. No, Mor said. The
8:14:17word echoed off the pillars, the glass,
8:14:19the rock. I was inclined to agree. The
8:14:23thought of these people, of Keir and
8:14:25Velaris, tainting it with their
8:14:27presence, their hatred and
8:14:28small-mindedness, their disdain and
8:14:30cruelty.
8:14:32Rhys did not refuse, did not shoot down
8:14:35the suggestion. "You can't be serious."
8:14:38Reese only watched Kier as he answered
8:14:40down the bond. "I anticipated this, and
8:14:43I took precautions.
8:14:45I contemplated it."
8:14:47"The meeting with the palace governors?"
8:14:49"That was tied to this?"
8:14:51"Yes." Reese and said to Kier,
8:14:54"There would be conditions." More opened
8:14:57her mouth, but Azriel laid a scarred
8:14:59hand of top hers. She snatched her hand
8:15:02back as if she'd been burned, burned as
8:15:04he had been.
8:15:06Azriel's mask of cold didn't so much as
8:15:08waver at the rejection, though Eris
8:15:10chuckled softly, enough to make Azriel's
8:15:13hazel eyes glaze with rage as he settled
8:15:16them upon the High Lord's son. Eris only
8:15:19inclined his head to the Shadow Singer.
8:15:22"I want unrestricted access," Kier said
8:15:25to Reese. "You will not get it," Reese
8:15:27said. "There will be limited stays,
8:15:30limited numbers allowed in, to be
8:15:32decided later."
8:15:34More turned pleading eyes to Reese, her
8:15:36city, the place that she loved so much.
8:15:40I could almost hear it, the crack I knew
8:15:42was about to sound amongst our own
8:15:44circle.
8:15:45Kier looked to More at last, noted the
8:15:47despair and anger, and smiled. He had no
8:15:51real desire to get out of here, only a
8:15:53desire to take something he'd
8:15:55undoubtedly gleaned that his daughter
8:15:56cherished.
8:15:58"I could have gladly shredded through
8:15:59his throat," as Kier said, "done."
8:16:03Reese didn't so much as smile. More was
8:16:05only staring and staring at him, that
8:16:08beseeching expression crumpling her
8:16:09face.
8:16:11"There is one more thing," I added,
8:16:13squaring my shoulders.
8:16:15"One more request." Kier deigned to
8:16:18acknowledge me. "Oh?" "I have need of
8:16:21the Uroboros mirror," I said, willing
8:16:24ice into my veins, "immediately."
8:16:27Interest and surprise flared in Kier's
8:16:29brown eyes, Moore's eyes.
8:16:32"Who told you that I have it?" he asked
8:16:34quietly. "Does it matter? I want it."
8:16:38"Do you even know what the Oroboros is?"
8:16:41"Consider your tone, Kier." Reese
8:16:44warned. Kier leaned forward, bracing his
8:16:47forearms on the table. "The mirror." He
8:16:50laughed under his breath.
8:16:52"Consider it my mating present." he
8:16:54added with "sweet venom, if you can take
8:16:57it."
8:16:58Not a threat to face him, but
8:17:01"What do you mean?"
8:17:02Kier rose to his feet, smirking like a
8:17:04cat with a canary in its mouth. "To take
8:17:07the Oroboros, to claim it, you must
8:17:10first look into it." He headed for the
8:17:12doors, not waiting to be dismissed. "And
8:17:15everyone who has attempted to do so has
8:17:17either gone mad or been broken beyond
8:17:20repair. Even a high lord or two, if
8:17:23legend is true."
8:17:24A shrug. "So, it is yours, if you dare
8:17:28to face it." Kier paused at the
8:17:30threshold as the doors opened on a
8:17:32phantom wind. He said to Reese, perhaps
8:17:35the closest he'd come to asking for
8:17:37permission to leave.
8:17:38"Lord Thanatos is having difficulties
8:17:41with his daughter again. He requires my
8:17:44assistance."
8:17:45Reese only waved a hand, as if he hadn't
8:17:48just yielded our city to the male. Kier
8:17:50jerked his chin at Ares.
8:17:52"I will wish to speak with you soon."
8:17:56Once he was done gloating over his
8:17:57victory tonight, what we'd given and
8:18:00lost.
8:18:01If the Oroboros could not be retrieved,
8:18:04at least without such terrible risk,
8:18:06I shut out the thought, sealing it away
8:18:09for later as Kier left, leaving us alone
8:18:12with Ares.
8:18:13The heir of autumn just sipped his wine.
8:18:16And I had the terrible sense that Moore
8:18:18had gone somewhere far, far away as Ares
8:18:21set down his goblet and said, "You look
8:18:23well, Moore." "You don't speak to her."
8:18:26Azriel said softly. Eris gave a bitter
8:18:29smile. "I see you're still holding a
8:18:31grudge." "This arrangement, Eris," Rhys
8:18:34said, "relies solely upon you keeping
8:18:37your mouth shut." Eris huffed a laugh.
8:18:40"And haven't I done an excellent job?
8:18:42Not even my father suspected when I left
8:18:44tonight."
8:18:46I glanced between my mate and Eris. "How
8:18:48did this come about?"
8:18:50Eris looked me over, the crown and
8:18:52dress. "You didn't think I knew your
8:18:54Shadow Singer would come sniffing around
8:18:57to see if I'd told my father about your
8:18:59powers, especially after my brothers so
8:19:02mysteriously forgot about them, too.
8:19:05I knew it was a matter of time before
8:19:07one of you arrived to take care of my
8:19:09memory, as well."
8:19:11Eris tapped the side of his head with a
8:19:13long finger.
8:19:14"Too bad for you. I learned a thing or
8:19:16two about Day mati. Too bad for my
8:19:19brothers that I never bothered to teach
8:19:21them."
8:19:22My chest tightened. "Rhys."
8:19:25"To keep me safe from Beron's wrath, to
8:19:27keep this potential alliance with the
8:19:29High Lords from falling apart before it
8:19:31began."
8:19:32"Rhys."
8:19:33It was an effort to keep my eyes from
8:19:35burning. A gentle caress down the bond
8:19:38was his only answer.
8:19:40"Of course I didn't tell my father."
8:19:42Eris went on, drinking from his wine
8:19:44again. "Why waste that sort of
8:19:46information on the bastard?" "His answer
8:19:48would be to hunt you down and kill you,
8:19:50not realizing how much [ __ ] we're in
8:19:52with Hybern, and that you might be the
8:19:55key to stopping it."
8:19:57"So he plans to join us, then." Rhys
8:19:59said. "Not if he learns about your
8:20:01little secret." Eris smirked. Moore
8:20:05blinked, as if realizing that Rhys's
8:20:07contact with Eris, his invitation here,
8:20:11the glance she gave me, clear and
8:20:12settled, told me enough.
8:20:15Hurt and anger still swirled, but
8:20:17understanding, too.
8:20:19"So, what's the asking price, Eris?" Mor
8:20:22demanded, leaning her bare arms on the
8:20:24dark glass. "Another little bride for
8:20:26you to torture."
8:20:28Something flickered in Eris's eyes. "I
8:20:30don't know who fed you those lies to
8:20:32begin with, Morrigan." He said with
8:20:34vicious calm, "Likely the bastards you
8:20:37surround yourself with." A sneer at
8:20:40Azriel. Mor snarled, rattling the
8:20:42glasses.
8:20:44"You never gave any evidence to the
8:20:45contrary, certainly not when you left me
8:20:48in those woods." "There were forces at
8:20:50work that you have never considered."
8:20:53Eris said coldly, "And I am not going to
8:20:55waste my breath explaining them to you.
8:20:58Believe what you want about me."
8:21:00"You hunted me down like an animal." I
8:21:02cut in. "I think we'll choose to believe
8:21:05the worst." Eris's pale face flushed.
8:21:08"I was given an order and sent to do it
8:21:11with two of my brothers." "And what of
8:21:14the brother you hunted down alongside
8:21:16me? The one whose lover you helped to
8:21:18execute before his eyes." Eris laid a
8:21:21hand flat on the table. "You know
8:21:23nothing about what happened that day,
8:21:26nothing."
8:21:27Silence.
8:21:28"Indulge me." was all I said. Eris
8:21:31stared me down. I stared right back.
8:21:35"How do you think he made it to the
8:21:37Spring border?" He said quietly. "I
8:21:40wasn't there when they did it. Ask him."
8:21:43I refused. It was the first and only
8:21:45time I have denied my father anything.
8:21:48He punished me, and by the time I got
8:21:50free, they were going to kill him, too.
8:21:54I made sure they didn't, made sure
8:21:56Tamlin got word anonymously to get the
8:21:58hell over to his own border,
8:22:01where two of Eris's brothers had been
8:22:03killed by Lucien and Tamlin.
8:22:06Eris picked at a stray thread on his
8:22:08jacket. "Not all of us were so lucky in
8:22:10our friends and family as you, Rhysand.
8:22:14Rhys's face was a mask of boredom.
8:22:16It would seem so.
8:22:18And none of this entirely erased what
8:22:20he'd done, but
8:22:22What is the asking price? I repeated.
8:22:26The same thing I told Azriel when I
8:22:27found him snooping through my father's
8:22:29woods yesterday.
8:22:31Hurt flared in Mor's eyes as she whipped
8:22:34her head toward the Shadow Singer.
8:22:36But Azriel didn't so much as acknowledge
8:22:38her as he announced, "When the time
8:22:40comes, we are to support Eris's bid to
8:22:43take the throne."
8:22:45Even as Azriel spoke, that frozen rage
8:22:48dulled his face, and Eris was wise
8:22:50enough to finally pale at the sight.
8:22:53Perhaps that was why Eris had kept
8:22:54knowledge of my powers to himself, not
8:22:57just for this sort of bargaining, but to
8:22:59avoid the wrath of the Shadow Singer,
8:23:01the blade at his side.
8:23:04"The request still stands, Rhysand,"
8:23:07Eris said, mastering himself, "to just
8:23:09kill my father and be done with it. I
8:23:11can pledge troops right now."
8:23:14Mother above, he didn't even try to hide
8:23:17it, to look at all remorseful.
8:23:19It was an effort to keep my jaw from
8:23:21dropping to the table at his intent, the
8:23:23casualness with which he spoke.
8:23:26"Tempting, but too messy," Rhys replied,
8:23:29"Baron sided with us in the war.
8:23:31Hopefully, he'll sway that way again."
8:23:34A pointed stare at Eris.
8:23:36"He will," Eris promised, running a
8:23:39finger over one of the claw marks gouged
8:23:41into the table, "and will remain
8:23:43blissfully unaware of Feyre's
8:23:46gifts."
8:23:47A throne in exchange for his silence and
8:23:50sway.
8:23:51"Promise him nothing you care about,"
8:23:54Rhys said, waving a hand in dismissal.
8:23:56Eris just rose to his feet. "We'll see."
8:24:00A frown at Mor as he drained his wine
8:24:02and set down the goblet.
8:24:04"I'm surprised you still can't control
8:24:06yourself around him. You had every
8:24:08emotion written right on that pretty
8:24:10face of yours. Watch it, Azriel warned.
8:24:14Eris looked between them, smiling
8:24:16faintly, secretly, as if he knew
8:24:18something that Azriel didn't.
8:24:20I wouldn't have touched you, he said to
8:24:23Mor, who blanched again. But when you
8:24:25[ __ ] that other bastard, a snarl
8:24:28ripped from Rhys's throat at that, and
8:24:30my own, I knew why you did it. Again,
8:24:33that secret smile that had Mor
8:24:35shrinking, shrinking. So I gave you your
8:24:38freedom, ending the betrothal in no
8:24:40uncertain terms.
8:24:43And what happened next? Azriel growled.
8:24:46A shadow crossed Eris's face. There are
8:24:49few things I regret. That is one of
8:24:51them. But
8:24:53perhaps one day, now that we are allies,
8:24:56I shall tell you why, what it cost me.
8:25:00I don't give a [ __ ] Mor said quietly.
8:25:03She pointed to the door. Get out.
8:25:06Eris gave a mocking bow to her, to all
8:25:09of us.
8:25:10See you at the meeting in 12 days.
8:25:16Chapter 27.
8:25:19We found Nesta and Amren waiting outside
8:25:21the throne room, both of them looking
8:25:23pissy and tired.
8:25:25Well, that made six of us.
8:25:27I didn't doubt Keir's claim about the
8:25:29mirror, and risking gazing into it, none
8:25:32of us could afford it to be broken,
8:25:34driven mad, none of us, not right now.
8:25:38Perhaps the Bone Carver had known that,
8:25:40had sent me on a fool's errand to amuse
8:25:43himself.
8:25:44We did not bother with goodbyes to the
8:25:46Whispering Court as we winnowed to the
8:25:48townhouse, to Velaris, the peace and
8:25:51beauty that now felt infinitely more
8:25:53fragile.
8:25:55Cassian had come off the roof at some
8:25:56point to join Lucien in the sitting
8:25:58room. The books from the wall spread on
8:26:00the low-lying table between them.
8:26:03Both got to their feet at the
8:26:04expressions on our faces. Cassian was
8:26:07halfway to Mor when she whirled on Rhys
8:26:09and said, "Why?"
8:26:11Her voice broke, and something in my
8:26:13chest cracked, too, at the tears that
8:26:16began running down her face.
8:26:18Rhys just stood there, staring down at
8:26:20her, his face unreadable. Watching as
8:26:23she slammed her hands into his chest and
8:26:25shouted, "Why?"
8:26:27He yielded a step.
8:26:29Eris found Azriel. Our hands were tied.
8:26:32I made the best of it. His throat
8:26:34bobbed. I'm sorry.
8:26:37Cassian was sizing them up, frozen
8:26:39halfway across the room, and I assumed
8:26:42Rhys was telling him mind to mind,
8:26:44assumed he was telling Amren and perhaps
8:26:46even Lucien and Nesta from their
8:26:48surprised blinks. Mor whirled on Azriel.
8:26:51"Why didn't you say anything?"
8:26:54Azriel held her gaze unflinchingly,
8:26:56didn't so much as rustle his wings.
8:26:59Because you would have tried to stop it,
8:27:01and we can't afford to lose Keir's
8:27:03alliance and face the threat of Eris.
8:27:06"You're working with that prick?"
8:27:08Cassian cut in, whatever catching up now
8:27:11over, apparently. He moved to Mor's
8:27:13side, a hand on her back.
8:27:16He shook his head at Azriel and Rhys,
8:27:18disgust curling his lip.
8:27:20"You should have spiked Eris's [ __ ]
8:27:21head to the front gates." Azriel only
8:27:24watched them with that icy indifference,
8:27:26but Lucien crossed his arms, leaning
8:27:28against the back of the couch.
8:27:30"I have to agree with Cassian. Eris is a
8:27:33snake."
8:27:35Perhaps Rhys had not filled him in on
8:27:36everything then, on what Eris had
8:27:38claimed about saving his youngest
8:27:40brothers in whatever way he could, of
8:27:42his defiance.
8:27:44"Your whole family is despicable." Amren
8:27:47said to Lucien from where she and Nesta
8:27:49lingered in the archway.
8:27:51"But Eris may prove a better alternative
8:27:54if he can find a way to kill Beron off
8:27:56and make sure the power shifts to
8:27:58himself.
8:27:59"I'm sure he will." Lucien said.
8:28:02But Mor was still staring at Rhys, those
8:28:04silent tears streaming down her flushed
8:28:07cheeks. "It's not about Eris." she said,
8:28:10voice wobbling. "It's about here." She
8:28:13waved a hand to the townhouse, the city.
8:28:15"This is my home, and you are going to
8:28:18let Keir destroy it."
8:28:20"I took precautions." Rhys said, an edge
8:28:23to his voice I had not heard in some
8:28:25time. "Many of them. Starting with
8:28:28meeting with the governors of the
8:28:29palaces and getting them to agree never
8:28:31to serve, shelter, or entertain Keir or
8:28:34anyone from the Court of Nightmares."
8:28:37Mor blinked. Cassian's hand moved to her
8:28:39shoulder and squeezed.
8:28:41"They have been sending out the word to
8:28:43every business owner in the city." Rhys
8:28:45went on. "Every restaurant and shop and
8:28:48venue.
8:28:49So, Keir and his ilk may come here, but
8:28:52they will not find it a welcoming place,
8:28:54or one where they can even procure
8:28:56lodgings."
8:28:57Mor shook her head as she whispered,
8:29:00"He'll still destroy it."
8:29:02Cassian slid his arm around her
8:29:03shoulders, his face harder than I'd ever
8:29:06seen it as he studied Rhys, then Azriel.
8:29:09"You should have warned us."
8:29:12"I should have." Rhys said, though he
8:29:14didn't sound sorry for it.
8:29:16Azriel just remained a foot away, wings
8:29:18tucked in tight and siphons glimmering.
8:29:21I stepped in at last. "We'll set
8:29:23limitations on when and how often they
8:29:26come."
8:29:27Mor shook her head, still not looking
8:29:29anywhere but at Rhys.
8:29:31"If Amarantha were alive
8:29:33the words slithered through the room,
8:29:35darkening the corners.
8:29:37If she were alive, and I offered to work
8:29:39with her, even if it was to save us all
8:29:42how would you feel?"
8:29:44"Never." They had never come this close
8:29:46to discussing what had happened to him.
8:29:49I approached Rhys's side, brushing my
8:29:51fingers against his, his own curled
8:29:53around mine.
8:29:55"If Amarantha offered us a slim shot at
8:29:57survival," Rhys said, his gaze
8:30:00unflinching, "then I would not give a
8:30:02[ __ ] that she made me [ __ ] her for all
8:30:04those years."
8:30:06Cassian flinched. The entire room
8:30:08flinched. "If Amarantha showed up at
8:30:10that door right now," Rhys snarled,
8:30:13pointing toward the foyer entry, "and
8:30:15said she could buy us a chance at
8:30:17defeating Hybern, at keeping all of you
8:30:19alive, I would thank the [ __ ]
8:30:22Cauldron." Mor shook her head, tears
8:30:25slipping free again.
8:30:26"You don't mean that." "I do."
8:30:29"Rhys."
8:30:30"But the bond." The bridge between us,
8:30:33it was a howling void, a raging dark
8:30:36tempest. Too far. This was pushing them
8:30:39both too far.
8:30:41I tried to catch Cassian's gaze, but he
8:30:43was monitoring them closely, his
8:30:45golden-brown skin unnaturally pale.
8:30:48Azriel's shadows gathered close,
8:30:50half-veiling him from view. And Amren?
8:30:53Amren stepped between Rhys and Mor. They
8:30:56both towered over her. "I kept this unit
8:30:59from breaking for 49 years," Amren said,
8:31:02eyes flaring bright as lightning. "I am
8:31:05not going to let you rip it to shreds
8:31:07now." She faced Mor. "Working with Keir
8:31:10and Eris is not forgiving them. And when
8:31:13this war is over, I will hunt them down
8:31:15and butcher them with you, if that is
8:31:17what you wish."
8:31:19Mor said nothing, though she at last
8:31:21looked away from Rhys.
8:31:24"My father will poison the city."
8:31:26"I will not allow him to," Amren said.
8:31:30I believed her.
8:31:31And I think Mor did, too, for the tears
8:31:33that continued sliding free. They seemed
8:31:36to shift, somehow.
8:31:38Amren turned to Rhys, whose face had now
8:31:40edged toward devastation.
8:31:43I slid my hand through his.
8:31:45"I see you," I said, giving him the
8:31:48words I'd once whispered all those
8:31:49months ago.
8:31:51"And it does not frighten me."
8:31:53Amren said to him, "You're a sneaky
8:31:55bastard. You always have been and likely
8:31:58always will be. But it doesn't excuse
8:32:01you, boy, from not warning us, warning
8:32:04her, not where those two monsters are
8:32:06involved. Yes, you made the right call,
8:32:09played it well,
8:32:10but you also played it badly."
8:32:13Something like shame dimmed his eyes.
8:32:16"I'm sorry."
8:32:17The words to Mor, to Amren.
8:32:21Amren's dark hair swayed as she assessed
8:32:23them. Mor just shook her head at last,
8:32:26more acceptance than denial.
8:32:28I swallowed, my voice rough as I said,
8:32:31"This is war. Our allies are few and
8:32:34already don't trust us."
8:32:36I met each of them in the eye, my
8:32:38sister, Lucien, Mor, and Azriel and
8:32:41Cassian, then Amren, then my mate.
8:32:45I squeezed his hand at the guilt now
8:32:47sinking its claws deep into him. "You
8:32:49all have been to war and back, when I've
8:32:52never even set foot on a battlefield.
8:32:54But
8:32:55I have to imagine that we will not last
8:32:57long if we cleave apart from within."
8:33:02Stumbling near incoherent words, but
8:33:05Azriel said at last, "She's right."
8:33:08Mor didn't so much as look in his
8:33:10direction. I could have sworn guilt
8:33:12clouded Azriel's eyes, there and gone in
8:33:15a blink.
8:33:16Amren stepped back to Nesta's side as
8:33:18Cassian asked me, "What happened with
8:33:20the mirror?"
8:33:22I shook my head.
8:33:23"Kier says it's mine if I dare to take
8:33:26it. Apparently, what you see inside will
8:33:28break you or drive you insane. No one's
8:33:31ever walked away from it."
8:33:33Cassian swore. "Exactly," I said.
8:33:36"It was a risk perhaps none of us were
8:33:38entirely prepared to face, not when we
8:33:41were all needed, each one of us.
8:33:44Mor added a bit hoarsely, straightening
8:33:46the ebony pleats and panels of her
8:33:48gossamer gown.
8:33:50My father spoke true about that.
8:33:52I was raised with legends of the mirror.
8:33:55None were pleasant or successful.
8:33:58Cassian frowned at me, at Rhys. So what?
8:34:01You are talking about the ouroboros,
8:34:04Amren said.
8:34:05I blinked. [ __ ] [ __ ] Why do you want
8:34:09that mirror?
8:34:10Her voice had slipped to a low timbre.
8:34:13Rhys slid his free hand into his pocket.
8:34:16If honesty is the theme of the night
8:34:19because the bone carver requested it.
8:34:21Amren's nostrils flared.
8:34:24You went to the prison.
8:34:26Your old friends say hello, Cassian
8:34:28drawled, leaning a shoulder against the
8:34:30sitting room archway.
8:34:32Amren's face tightened, Nesta glancing
8:34:34between them carefully, reading us,
8:34:37especially as Amren's quicksilver eyes
8:34:39swirled. Why did you go?
8:34:42I opened my mouth, but the gold of
8:34:44Lucien's eye caught my attention, snared
8:34:47it. My hesitation must have been
8:34:49indication enough of my weariness.
8:34:51Jaw tight with a hint of frustration,
8:34:54Lucien excused himself to his room.
8:34:56Frustration and perhaps disappointment.
8:34:59I blocked it out, what it did to my
8:35:01stomach.
8:35:03We had some questions for the carver.
8:35:05Cassian gave Amren a slash of a smile
8:35:07when Lucien was gone.
8:35:09And we have some for you. Amren's
8:35:12smoke-filled eyes flared.
8:35:14You are going to unleash the carver.
8:35:17I said simply Yes. A one monster army.
8:35:21That is impossible.
8:35:23I'll remind you that you, sweet Amren,
8:35:25escaped, Rhys countered smoothly, and
8:35:28have stayed free. So it can be done.
8:35:31Perhaps you could tell us how you did
8:35:32it.
8:35:33Cassian had stationed himself by the
8:35:35doorway, I realized, to be closer to
8:35:37Nesta, to grab her if Amren decided she
8:35:40didn't particularly care for where this
8:35:42conversation was headed or for any of
8:35:44the furniture in this room.
8:35:47Precisely why Rhys now placed himself on
8:35:49Amren's other side to draw her attention
8:35:51away from me and more behind us, every
8:35:54muscle in her lithe body on alert.
8:35:57Cassian was staring at Nesta hard enough
8:36:00that my sister at last twisted toward
8:36:02him, met his gaze. His head tilted
8:36:05slightly, a silent order.
8:36:08Nesta, to my shock, obeyed, drifted over
8:36:11to Cassian's side as Amren replied to
8:36:13Rhys.
8:36:14"No."
8:36:16"It wasn't a request," Rhys said.
8:36:19He'd once admitted that merely
8:36:20questioning Amren had been something
8:36:21she'd allowed him to do only in recent
8:36:24years, but giving her an order, pushing
8:36:27her like this? Feyre and Cassian spoke
8:36:29to the Bone Carver. "He wants the
8:36:31Ouroboros in exchange for serving us,
8:36:34fighting Hybern for us, but we need you
8:36:36to explain how to get him out."
8:36:39The bargain Rhys or I would strike with
8:36:41him would suffice to hold him to our
8:36:43will.
8:36:44"Anything else?" Her voice was too calm,
8:36:47too sweet. "When we're done with all of
8:36:49this," Rhys said, "then my promise from
8:36:52months ago still holds. Use the book to
8:36:55send yourself home if you want."
8:36:57Amren stared up at him. It was so quiet
8:37:00that the clock on the sitting room
8:37:01mantel could be heard, and beyond that,
8:37:04the fountain in the garden.
8:37:06"Call off your dog," Amren said with
8:37:08that lethal tone, because the shadow in
8:37:11the corner behind Amren, that was
8:37:13Azriel, the obsidian hilt of
8:37:15Truth-Teller in his scarred hand. He'd
8:37:18moved without my realizing it, though I
8:37:20had no doubt the others had likely been
8:37:22aware.
8:37:24Amren bared her teeth at him. Azriel's
8:37:26beautiful face didn't so much as shift.
8:37:29Rhys remained where he was as he asked
8:37:31Amren,
8:37:32"Why won't you tell us?"
8:37:34Cassian casually slid Nesta behind him,
8:37:37his fingers snagging in the skirts of
8:37:39her black gown, as if to reassure
8:37:41himself that she wasn't in Amren's
8:37:43direct path.
8:37:44Nesta only rose onto her toes to peer
8:37:47over his shoulder.
8:37:49"Because the stone beneath this house
8:37:51has ears. The wind has ears. All of it
8:37:54listening." Amren said. "And if it
8:37:57reports back, they will remember,
8:38:00Rhysand, that they have not caught me,
8:38:02and I will not let them put me in that
8:38:04black pit again."
8:38:07My ears hollowed out as a shield clicked
8:38:09into place.
8:38:11"No one will hear beyond this room."
8:38:14Amren surveyed the books lying forgotten
8:38:16on the low table in the sitting room.
8:38:18Her brows narrowed.
8:38:20"I had to give something up. I had to
8:38:23give me up. To walk out, I had to become
8:38:26something else entirely. Something the
8:38:29prison would not recognize. So, I
8:38:32I bound myself into this body."
8:38:35I'd never heard her stumble over a word
8:38:37before.
8:38:38"You said someone else bound you." Rhys
8:38:40questioned carefully. "I lied to cover
8:38:44what I'd done, so none could know.
8:38:46To escape the prison, I made myself
8:38:48mortal. Immortal as you are, but mortal
8:38:52compared to
8:38:53to what I was.
8:38:55And what I was,
8:38:57I did not feel the way you do, the way I
8:39:00do now. Some things, loyalty and wrath
8:39:03and curiosity, but not the full
8:39:05spectrum.
8:39:07Again, that far away look.
8:39:09I was perfect, according to some. I did
8:39:12not regret, did not mourn. And pain,
8:39:16I did not experience it. And yet
8:39:19yet I wound up here because I was not
8:39:22quite like the others. Even as as what I
8:39:25was, I was different. Too curious, too
8:39:29questioning. The day the rip appeared in
8:39:32the sky, it was curiosity that drove me.
8:39:35My brothers and sisters fled. Upon the
8:39:38orders of our ruler, we had just laid
8:39:40waste to twin cities, smoked them wholly
8:39:43into rubble on the plain. And yet they
8:39:45fled from that rip in the world.
8:39:47But I wanted to look. I wanted I was not
8:39:51built or bred to feel such selfish
8:39:53things as want. I'd seen what happened
8:39:56to those of my kind who strayed, who
8:39:58learned to place their needs first, who
8:40:00developed feeling.
8:40:03But I went through the tear in the sky,
8:40:06and here I am.
8:40:08And you gave all that up to get out of
8:40:10the prison? Mora asked softly.
8:40:13I yielded my grace, my perfect
8:40:16immortality. I knew that once I did, I
8:40:19would feel pain and regret. I would
8:40:21want, and I would burn with it. I would
8:40:25fall.
8:40:26But I was
8:40:27the time locked away down there.
8:40:30I didn't care. I had not felt the wind
8:40:33on my face, had not smelled the rain. I
8:40:36did not even remember what they felt
8:40:37like. I did not remember sunlight. It
8:40:41was to Azrael that her attention
8:40:42drifted, the Shadow Singer's darkness
8:40:45pulling away to reveal eyes full of
8:40:47understanding. Locked away.
8:40:50So I bound myself into this body. I
8:40:53shoved my burning grace deep into me. I
8:40:56gave up everything I was. The cell door
8:40:59just unlocked. And so I walked out.
8:41:03A burning grace that still smoldered far
8:41:06within her, visible only through the
8:41:08smoke in her gray eyes. That will be the
8:41:11cost of freeing the Carver, Amren said.
8:41:14You will have to bind him into a body,
8:41:17make him Fae. And I doubt he will agree
8:41:20to it, especially without the Ouroboros.
8:41:24We were silent.
8:41:25"You should have asked me before you
8:41:27went," she said, that sharpness
8:41:29returning to her tone. "I would have
8:41:31spared you the visit."
8:41:33Rhysand swallowed.
8:41:35"Can you be unbound?"
8:41:38"Not by me."
8:41:40"What would happen if you were?"
8:41:41Amren stared at him for a long while,
8:41:44then me, Cassian, Azriel, Mor, Nesta,
8:41:48finally back to my mate.
8:41:50"I would not remember you. I would not
8:41:53care for any of you. I would either
8:41:55smite you or abandon you.
8:41:57What I feel now,
8:41:59it would be foreign to me. It would hold
8:42:01no sway. Everything I am, this body, it
8:42:06would cease to be."
8:42:07"What were you?" Nesta breathed, coming
8:42:10around Cassian to stand at his side.
8:42:13Amren toyed with one of her black pearl
8:42:15earrings.
8:42:16"A messenger.
8:42:18A soldier assassin for a wrathful god
8:42:21who ruled a young world."
8:42:23I could feel the questions of the others
8:42:25brewing. Rhys's eyes were near glowing
8:42:27with them.
8:42:29"Was Amren your name?" Nesta asked.
8:42:32"No." The smoke swirled in her eyes.
8:42:35"I do not remember the name I was given.
8:42:38I used Amren because
8:42:40it's a long story."
8:42:42I almost begged her to tell it, but soft
8:42:44footsteps thudded, and then
8:42:46"Oh."
8:42:48Elain started, enough so that I realized
8:42:50she couldn't hear us, had no idea where
8:42:52we were thanks to the shield that kept
8:42:54sound from escaping.
8:42:56It instantly dropped, but my sister
8:42:58remained near the stairs.
8:43:00She'd covered her nightgown with a silk
8:43:02shawl of palest blue, her fingers
8:43:04grappling into the fabric as she held
8:43:06herself.
8:43:07I went to her immediately.
8:43:09"Do you need anything?"
8:43:11"No, I
8:43:13I was sleeping, but I heard"
8:43:15She shook her head, blinked at our
8:43:17formal attire, the dark crown atop my
8:43:19head, and Rhysand's. I didn't hear you.
8:43:23Azriel stepped forward, but you heard
8:43:26something else.
8:43:27Elaine seemed about to nod, but only
8:43:29backed away.
8:43:31I think I was dreaming, she murmured.
8:43:34I think I'm always dreaming these days.
8:43:37Let me get you some hot milk, I said,
8:43:40putting a hand on her elbow to guide her
8:43:42into the sitting room. But Elaine shook
8:43:44me off, heading back to the stairs. She
8:43:47said as she climbed the first steps,
8:43:50I can hear her crying.
8:43:53I gripped the bottom post of the
8:43:54banister. Who?
8:43:56Everyone thinks she's dead. Elaine kept
8:43:59walking. But she's not. Only different.
8:44:03Changed.
8:44:05As I was.
8:44:07Who? I pushed, but Elaine continued up
8:44:09the stairs, that shawl drooping down her
8:44:12back. Nesta stalked from Cassian's side
8:44:15to approach my own. We both sucked in a
8:44:17breath. To say what, I didn't know, but
8:44:20What did you see? Azriel said, and I
8:44:23tried not to flinch as I found him at my
8:44:25other side, not having seen him move
8:44:27again.
8:44:29Elaine paused halfway up the stairs.
8:44:31Slowly, she turned to look back at him.
8:44:35I saw young hands wither with age. I saw
8:44:38a box of black stone.
8:44:40I saw a feather of fire land on snow and
8:44:43melt it.
8:44:45My stomach dropped to the floor. One
8:44:47glance at Nesta confirmed that she felt
8:44:49it, too, saw it.
8:44:51Mad. Elaine might very well have gone
8:44:53mad.
8:44:55It was angry, Elaine said quietly.
8:44:58It was so, so angry that something was
8:45:01taken.
8:45:02So it took something from them as
8:45:04punishment.
8:45:06We said nothing. I didn't know what to
8:45:08say, what to even ask or demand. If the
8:45:11Cauldron had done something to her as
8:45:13well.
8:45:14I faced Azriel, exposing my palms to
8:45:17him.
8:45:18What does that mean?
8:45:20Azriel's hazel eyes churned as he
8:45:22studied my sister, her too-thin body,
8:45:25and without a word, he winnowed away.
8:45:28Mor watched the space where he'd been
8:45:29standing long after he was gone.
8:45:35I waited until the others had left,
8:45:37Cassian and Rees slipping away to ponder
8:45:39the possibilities or lack thereof of our
8:45:41would-be allies, Amren storming off to
8:45:44be rid of us entirely, and Mor striding
8:45:47out to enjoy what she deemed as her last
8:45:49few days of peace in this city, a
8:45:51brittleness still in her voice, before I
8:45:54cornered Nesta in the sitting room.
8:45:57What happened at the Hybern city with
8:45:59you and Amren?
8:46:00You didn't mention it.
8:46:02It was fine.
8:46:03I clenched my jaw. What happened?
8:46:06She brought me to a room full of
8:46:08treasure, strange objects, and it
8:46:11She tugged at the tight sleeve of her
8:46:13gown. Some of it wanted to hurt us, as
8:46:16if it were alive, aware, like
8:46:19like in all those stories and lies we
8:46:21were fed over the wall.
8:46:24Are you all right?
8:46:25I couldn't find any signs of harm on
8:46:27either of them, and neither had said
8:46:29anything to suggest it was a training
8:46:31exercise with a form of magic designed
8:46:34to repel intruders.
8:46:36The words were recited, as the wall will
8:46:39likely be.
8:46:40She wanted me to breach the defenses,
8:46:42find weaknesses.
8:46:44And repair them? Just find the
8:46:47weaknesses. Repairing is another thing.
8:46:50Nesta said, her eyes going distant as
8:46:53she frowned at the still-open books on
8:46:55the low table before the fireplace. I
8:46:57sighed.
8:46:58So, that went right, at least. Those
8:47:02eyes went razor sharp again.
8:47:04I failed every time. So, no, it did not
8:47:08go right.
8:47:09I didn't know what to say. Sympathy
8:47:11would likely earn me a tongue lashing,
8:47:13so I opted for another route.
8:47:16We need to do something about Elaine.
8:47:18Nesta stiffened. And what solution do
8:47:21you propose, exactly? Letting your mate
8:47:23into her mind to scramble things around?
8:47:26I'd never do that. I don't think Rhys
8:47:29can even fix things like that.
8:47:32Nesta paced in front of the darkened
8:47:33fireplace. Everything has a cost. Maybe
8:47:37the cost of her youth and immortality
8:47:39was losing part of her sanity.
8:47:41My knees wobbled enough that I took a
8:47:43seat on the deep cushioned couch.
8:47:46What was your cost?
8:47:47Nesta stopped moving.
8:47:49Perhaps it was to see Elaine suffer
8:47:52while I got away unscathed.
8:47:55I shot to my feet. Nesta, don't bother.
8:47:58But I trailed her as she strode for the
8:48:00stairs to where Lucien was now
8:48:02descending the steps and winced at the
8:48:04sight of her approach.
8:48:06He gave her a wide berth as she stormed
8:48:08past him. One look at his taut face had
8:48:10me bracing myself and returning to the
8:48:13sitting room.
8:48:14I slumped into the nearest armchair,
8:48:17surprised to find myself still in my
8:48:18black dress as the fabric scraped
8:48:21against my bare skin.
8:48:23How long had I been back from the Hewn
8:48:24City? 30 minutes? Less? And had the
8:48:28prison only been that morning?
8:48:30It felt like days ago.
8:48:33I rested my head against the embroidered
8:48:34back of the chair and watched Lucien
8:48:36take a seat on the rolled arm of the
8:48:38nearest couch. Long day. I grunted my
8:48:41response. That metal eye tightened.
8:48:44I thought the prison was another myth.
8:48:47Well, it's not.
8:48:49He weighed my tone and crossed his arms.
8:48:52Let me do something about Elaine. I
8:48:55heard from my room everything that
8:48:57happened just now.
8:48:59It wouldn't hurt to have a healer look
8:49:00her over, externally and internally.
8:49:04I was tired enough that I could barely
8:49:06summon the breath to ask,
8:49:08"Do you think the Cauldron made her
8:49:09insane?"
8:49:11"I think she went through something
8:49:12terrible." Lucien countered carefully.
8:49:15"And it wouldn't hurt to have your best
8:49:17healer do a thorough examination."
8:49:19I rubbed my hand over my face.
8:49:22"All [sighs] right." My breath snagged
8:49:24on the words.
8:49:25"Tomorrow morning." I managed a shallow
8:49:28nod, rallying my strength to rise from
8:49:30the chair. Heavy. There was an old
8:49:33heaviness in me, like I could sleep for
8:49:35a hundred years and it wouldn't be
8:49:37enough.
8:49:39"Please tell me." Lucien said when I
8:49:41crossed the threshold into the foyer,
8:49:43"what the healer says. And if
8:49:46if you need me for anything."
8:49:48I gave him one final nod, speech
8:49:51suddenly beyond me.
8:49:53I knew Nesta still wasn't asleep as I
8:49:55walked past her room, knew she'd heard
8:49:57every word of our conversation thanks to
8:49:59that Fae hearing.
8:50:01And I knew she heard as I listened at
8:50:03Elaine's door, knocked once, and poked
8:50:06my head in to find her asleep,
8:50:08breathing.
8:50:09I sent a request to Maja, Rhysand's
8:50:12preferred healer, to come the next day
8:50:14at 11:00. I did not explain why or who
8:50:17or what,
8:50:18then went into my bedroom, crawled onto
8:50:20the mattress, and cried.
8:50:23I didn't really know why.
8:50:27Strong, broad hands rubbed down my
8:50:29spine, and I opened my eyes to find the
8:50:32room wholly black. Rhysand perched on
8:50:34the mattress beside me.
8:50:37"Do you want anything to eat?" His voice
8:50:39was soft, tentative.
8:50:41I didn't raise my head from the pillow.
8:50:44"I feel
8:50:45heavy again."
8:50:47I breathed, voice breaking.
8:50:49Rhys said nothing as he gathered me up
8:50:51into his arms. He was still in his
8:50:53jacket, as if he'd had come in from
8:50:55wherever he'd been talking with Cassian.
8:50:58In the dark, I breathed in his scent,
8:51:01savored his warmth.
8:51:03"Are you all right?"
8:51:05Rhys was quiet for a long minute. "No."
8:51:08I slid my arms around him, holding him
8:51:10tightly.
8:51:12"I should have found another way." he
8:51:14said. I stroked my fingers through his
8:51:16silken hair.
8:51:18Rhys murmured, "If she"
8:51:20His swallow was audible.
8:51:22"If she showed up at this house" I knew
8:51:25who he meant.
8:51:26"I would kill her." "Without even
8:51:28letting her speak, I would kill her."
8:51:32"I know." "I would, too."
8:51:34"You asked me at the library." he
8:51:37whispered. "Why I"
8:51:39"Why I'd rather take all of this upon
8:51:41myself."
8:51:42"Tonight is why. Seeing Mor cry is why."
8:51:47"I made a bad call." "Tried to find some
8:51:49other way around this [ __ ] hole we're
8:51:51in."
8:51:52"And had lost something. Mor had lost
8:51:55something in the process."
8:51:57We held each other in silence for
8:51:59minutes, hours. Two souls twining in the
8:52:02dark. I lowered my shields, let him in
8:52:05fully. His mind curled around mine.
8:52:09"Would you risk looking into it, the
8:52:11ouroboros?" I asked.
8:52:14"Not yet." was all Rhys said, holding me
8:52:16tighter.
8:52:18"Not yet."
8:52:23Chapter 28
8:52:25I dragged myself out of bed by sheer
8:52:27will the next morning.
8:52:29Amren had said the Carver wouldn't bind
8:52:31himself into a fae body, had claimed
8:52:33that. But it wouldn't hurt to try. If it
8:52:36gave us the slightest chance of holding
8:52:38out, of keeping Rhys from giving
8:52:40everything.
8:52:42He was already gone by the time I awoke.
8:52:45I gritted my teeth as I dressed in my
8:52:46leathers and winnowed to the House of
8:52:48Wind. I had my wings ready as I hit the
8:52:51wards protecting it and managed a decent
8:52:53enough glide into the open air training
8:52:55ring on its flat top.
8:52:57Cassian was already waiting, hands on
8:53:00his hips, watching as I eased down,
8:53:03down, too fast. My feet skipped over the
8:53:06dirt, bouncing me up, up. Back flap. His
8:53:10warning was too late. I slammed into a
8:53:12wall of crimson before I could get a
8:53:14face full of the ruddy rock, but
8:53:17I swore, pride skinned as much as my
8:53:19palms as I staggered back, my wings
8:53:22unwieldy behind me.
8:53:24Cassian's shoulders shook as he reined
8:53:26in a laugh, and I gave him a vulgar
8:53:28gesture in return.
8:53:30If you go in for a landing that way,
8:53:32make sure you have room. I scowled.
8:53:35Lesson learned. Or space to bank and
8:53:38circle until you slow. I get it. Cassian
8:53:41held up his hands, but the amusement
8:53:44faded as he watched me dismiss the wings
8:53:46and stalk toward him.
8:53:48You want to go hard today, or take it
8:53:50easy?
8:53:51I didn't think the others gave him
8:53:53enough credit for noticing the shift in
8:53:55someone's emotional current. To command
8:53:57legions, I supposed, he needed to be
8:54:00able to read that sort of thing. Judge
8:54:02when his soldiers or enemies were strong
8:54:04or breaking or broken.
8:54:07I peered inside to that place where I
8:54:09now felt like quicksand and said,
8:54:12hard. I want to limp out of here.
8:54:15I peeled off the leather jacket and
8:54:17rolled up the sleeves of my white shirt.
8:54:19Cassian swept an assessing stare over
8:54:21me.
8:54:22He murmured,
8:54:24it helps me, too. The physical activity,
8:54:27the training.
8:54:28He rolled his shoulders as I began to
8:54:30stretch.
8:54:31It's always helped me focus and center
8:54:33myself, and after last night,
8:54:36he tied back his dark hair, I definitely
8:54:39need it. This.
8:54:41I held my leg folded behind me, my
8:54:44muscles protesting at the stretch. I
8:54:46suppose there are worse methods of
8:54:48coping. A lopsided grin. Indeed, there
8:54:51are.
8:54:55Azriel's lesson afterward consisted of
8:54:57standing in a breeze and trying to
8:54:59memorize his instructions on currents
8:55:01and downdrafts, on how heat and cold
8:55:03could shape wind and speed. Throughout
8:55:06it, he was quiet, removed even by his
8:55:09standards.
8:55:11I made the mistake of asking if he'd
8:55:12spoken to Moore since he'd left last
8:55:14night. No, he had not, and that was
8:55:17that.
8:55:18Even if he kept flexing his scarred hand
8:55:20at his side, as if recalling the
8:55:22sensation of the hand she'd whipped free
8:55:24of his touch during that meeting, over
8:55:27and over.
8:55:29I didn't dare tell him that he'd made
8:55:30the right call, that perhaps he should
8:55:32talk to Moore rather than let the guilt
8:55:35eat at him.
8:55:36The two of them had enough between them
8:55:38without me shoving myself into it.
8:55:41I was indeed limping by the time I
8:55:43returned to the townhouse hours later,
8:55:45finding Moore at the dining table,
8:55:47munching on a giant pastry she'd grabbed
8:55:49from a bakery on her way in.
8:55:52"You look like a team of horses trampled
8:55:54you," she said around her food.
8:55:56"Good," I said, taking the pastry out of
8:55:59her hand and finishing it off. She
8:56:01squawked in outrage, but snapped her
8:56:04fingers and a plate of carved melon from
8:56:06the kitchen down the hall appeared on
8:56:08the polished table before her.
8:56:10Right atop the pile of what looked to be
8:56:12letters on various pieces of stationery.
8:56:15"What's that?" I said, wiping the crumbs
8:56:18from my mouth.
8:56:20"The first of the High Lords'
8:56:21responses," she said sweetly, plucking
8:56:24up a slice of the green fruit and biting
8:56:26off a chunk. No hint of last night's
8:56:28rage and fear.
8:56:30"That pleasant, hm?"
8:56:32"Helion's came first this morning.
8:56:35Between all the innuendo, I think he
8:56:37said he'd be willing to join us."
8:56:40I lifted my brows.
8:56:42That's good, isn't it? A shrug. Helion
8:56:46we weren't worried about. The other two,
8:56:49she finished off the melon chewing
8:56:51wetly.
8:56:52Theissen says he'll come but won't do it
8:56:54unless it's in a truly neutral and safe
8:56:56location. Kallias,
8:56:59he doesn't trust any of us after under
8:57:02the mountain. He wants to bring armed
8:57:04guards.
8:57:05Day, Dawn, and Winter are closest
8:57:08allies.
8:57:09No word from anyone else? My gut
8:57:12tightened. No. Spring, Autumn, and
8:57:14Summer haven't sent a reply.
8:57:17We don't have much time until the
8:57:18meeting. What if they refuse to reply at
8:57:21all?
8:57:22I didn't have the nerve to wonder aloud
8:57:24if Eris would be good to his word and
8:57:25make sure his father attended and joined
8:57:28our cause. Not with the light back in
8:57:30her face.
8:57:32Mor picked up another slice of melon.
8:57:34Then, we'll have to decide if Rhys and I
8:57:37will go drag them by their necks to this
8:57:39meeting or if we'll have it without
8:57:40them. I'd suggest the second option. Mor
8:57:44furrowed her brows. The first, I
8:57:46clarified, doesn't sound conducive to
8:57:49actually forming an alliance. Though I
8:57:51was surprised that Tarquin hadn't
8:57:53responded. Even with his blood feud with
8:57:55us. The male I'd met, whom I still
8:57:58admired so much, surely he'd want to
8:58:01ally against Hybern. Unless he now
8:58:03wanted to ally with them to ensure Rhys
8:58:06and I were wiped off the map forever.
8:58:09We'll see, was all Mor said. I blew out
8:58:12a breath through my nose.
8:58:14About last night. It's fine. It's
8:58:17nothing. The swiftness with which she
8:58:19spoke suggested anything but.
8:58:22It's not nothing. You're allowed to feel
8:58:24that way. Mor fluffed her hair. Well, it
8:58:28won't help us win this war. No, but
8:58:32I'm not sure what to say.
8:58:34Mor stared toward the window for a long
8:58:36moment.
8:58:38I understand why Rhys did it. The
8:58:40position we were in. Eris is
8:58:43you know what he is like. And if he was
8:58:45indeed threatening to sell information
8:58:47about your gifts to his father,
8:58:49mother above, I would have made the same
8:58:52bargain with Eris to keep Baron from
8:58:53hunting you.
8:58:55Something in my chest eased at that.
8:58:58It's just
8:58:59my father knew. The second he heard of
8:59:01this place, he probably knew what it
8:59:03meant to me.
8:59:04There would have been no other asking
8:59:06price for my father's help in this war.
8:59:08None. Rhys knew that as well. Tried to
8:59:11bring Eris into it to sweeten the deal
8:59:13for my father. To possibly avoid this
8:59:16outcome with Valaris altogether.
8:59:19I raised my brows in silent question.
8:59:21We talked, Rhys and I, this morning.
8:59:24While Cassian was kicking your ass.
8:59:27I snorted.
8:59:28What about Azriel?
8:59:30So much for my decision to stay out of
8:59:32it.
8:59:32Mor resumed picking at the melon.
8:59:35As
8:59:36he had a tough call to make when Eris
8:59:39found him.
8:59:40He she chewed on her lip.
8:59:43I don't know why I expected him to side
8:59:45with me. Why it caught me so off guard.
8:59:48I refrained from suggesting she tell him
8:59:50that. Mor shrugged. It just
8:59:53it all took me by surprise. And I will
8:59:56never be happy about any of these terms,
8:59:58but
8:59:59my father wins. Eris wins. All the males
9:00:03like them win if I let it get to me. If
9:00:05I let it impact my joy, my life, my
9:00:08relationships with all of you.
9:00:11She sighed at the ceiling.
9:00:13I hate war.
9:00:15Likewise.
9:00:16Not just for the death and awfulness,
9:00:18Mor went on, but because of what it does
9:00:21to us. These decisions.
9:00:24I nodded. Even if I was only starting to
9:00:26understand the choices and the costs.
9:00:30I opened my mouth, but a knock on the
9:00:32front door sounded. I glanced to the
9:00:34clock in the sitting room across the
9:00:36foyer. Right, the healer.
9:00:39I'd mentioned to Elaine this morning
9:00:40that Maja was coming to see her at
9:00:4211:00, and I'd gotten a noncommittal
9:00:44response. Better than outright refusal,
9:00:47I supposed. "Are you going to answer the
9:00:50door, or should I?" I made a vulgar
9:00:52gesture at the sheer sass in Mor's
9:00:54question, but my friend gripped my hand
9:00:57as I rose from my chair.
9:00:59"If you need anything, I'll be right
9:01:01here."
9:01:02I gave Mor a small, grateful smile.
9:01:05"As will I."
9:01:07She was still smiling at me as I took a
9:01:09deep breath before heading for the
9:01:11entry.
9:01:14The healer found nothing.
9:01:16I believed her, if only because Maja was
9:01:19one of the few High Fae I'd seen whose
9:01:21dark skin was etched with wrinkles, her
9:01:23hair spindrift fine with age. Her brown
9:01:26eyes were still clear and kindled with
9:01:28an inner warmth, and her knobby hands
9:01:30remained steady as she passed them over
9:01:33Elaine's body while my sister lay
9:01:35patiently, silently on the bed. Magic,
9:01:38sweet and cooling, had thrummed from the
9:01:40female, filling Elaine's bedroom. And
9:01:43when she had gently laid her hands on
9:01:45either side of Elaine's head, and I'd
9:01:47started, Maja had only smiled wryly over
9:01:50her thin shoulder and told me to relax.
9:01:53Nesta, sharp-eyed in the corner, had
9:01:55kept quiet.
9:01:57After a long minute, Maja asked us to
9:02:00join her in fetching Elaine a cup of tea
9:02:02with a pointed glance to the door.
9:02:05We both took the invitation and left our
9:02:07sister in her sunlit room.
9:02:10"What do you mean nothing is wrong with
9:02:12her?" Nesta hissed under her breath as
9:02:15the ancient female braced a hand on the
9:02:17stair railing to help herself down. I
9:02:19kept beside the healer, a hand in easy
9:02:22reach of her elbow should she need it.
9:02:25Maja, I reminded myself, had healed
9:02:27Cassian and Azriel and countless
9:02:30injuries beyond that. She'd healed
9:02:32Rhys's wings during the war. She looked
9:02:35ancient, but I had no doubt of her
9:02:37stamina or sheer will to help her
9:02:39patients.
9:02:41Macha didn't deign to answer Nesta until
9:02:43we were at the bottom of the steps.
9:02:45Lucien was already waiting in the
9:02:47sitting room, Mor still lingering in the
9:02:49dining room.
9:02:50Both of them rose to their feet, but
9:02:52remained in their respective rooms
9:02:54flanking the foyer.
9:02:56"What I mean," Macha said at last,
9:02:59sizing up Nesta, then me, "is that I can
9:03:02find nothing wrong with her. Her body is
9:03:05fine, too thin and in need of more food
9:03:07and fresh air,
9:03:09but nothing amiss. And as for her mind,
9:03:12I cannot enter it."
9:03:14I blinked. "She has a shield?"
9:03:17"She is cauldron-made,"
9:03:19the healer said, again looking over
9:03:21Nesta.
9:03:22"You are not like the rest of us. I
9:03:25cannot pierce the places it left its
9:03:26mark most deeply.
9:03:29The mind, the soul." She shot me a
9:03:31warning glance, "And I would not try if
9:03:34I were you, lady."
9:03:36"But do you think there's something
9:03:37wrong, even if there are no signs?"
9:03:40Nesta pushed. "I have seen the victims
9:03:42of trauma before. Her symptoms match
9:03:45well with many of those invisible
9:03:47wounds, but
9:03:49she was also made by something I do not
9:03:51understand. Is there something wrong
9:03:54with her?"
9:03:55Macha chewed over the words.
9:03:57"I do not like that word, wrong.
9:04:00Different, perhaps. Changed."
9:04:03"Does she need further help?" Nesta said
9:04:05through her teeth.
9:04:07The ancient healer jerked her chin
9:04:08toward Lucien. "See what he can do. If
9:04:11anyone can sense something is amiss,
9:04:14it's a mate." "How?" The word was barely
9:04:17more than a barked command. I braced
9:04:19myself to warn Nesta to be polite, but
9:04:22Macha said to my sister, as if she were
9:04:24a small child, "The mating bond. It is a
9:04:28bridge between souls."
9:04:30The healer's tone made my sister
9:04:32stiffen, but Maja was already hobbling
9:04:35for the front door. She pointed at
9:04:37Lucien as she saw herself out.
9:04:40"Try sitting down with her, just
9:04:42talking, sensing. See what you pick up,
9:04:46but don't push."
9:04:48Then she was gone.
9:04:50I whirled on Nesta. "A little respect,
9:04:53Nesta. Call another healer." "Not if
9:04:56you're going to bark them out of the
9:04:57house." "Call another healer."
9:05:01Mor strode for us with deceptive calm,
9:05:03and Nesta gave her a withering glare. I
9:05:06caught Lucien's eye.
9:05:08"Would you try it?" Nesta snarled,
9:05:10"Don't you even attempt." "Be quiet," I
9:05:13snapped. Nesta blinked. I bared my teeth
9:05:16at her. "He will try, and if he doesn't
9:05:19find anything amiss, we'll consider
9:05:21bringing another healer."
9:05:23"You're just going to drag her down
9:05:25here?" "I'm going to invite her."
9:05:28Nesta faced Mor, still watching from the
9:05:30archway.
9:05:32"And what will you be doing?"
9:05:34Mor gave my sister a half smile. "I'll
9:05:36be sitting with Feyre, keeping an eye on
9:05:39things."
9:05:40Lucien muttered something about not
9:05:42needing to be monitored, and we all
9:05:44looked at him with raised brows.
9:05:46He just lifted his hands, claimed he
9:05:48wanted to freshen up, and headed down
9:05:51the hall.
9:05:56Chapter 29
9:05:59It was the most uncomfortable 30 minutes
9:06:01I could recall.
9:06:03Mor and I sipped chilled mint tea by the
9:06:05bay window, the replies of the three
9:06:07high lords piled on the little table
9:06:09between our twin chairs, pretending to
9:06:12be watching the summer-kissed street
9:06:13beyond us, the children, High Fae and
9:06:16fairy, darting about with kites and
9:06:19streamers and all manner of toys,
9:06:21pretending while Lucien and Elain sat in
9:06:25stilted silence by the dim fireplace, an
9:06:28untouched tea service between them.
9:06:30I didn't dare ask if he was trying to
9:06:32get into her head, or if he was feeling
9:06:34a bond similar to that black adamant
9:06:37bridge between Rhys's mind and my own.
9:06:39If a normal mating bond felt wholly
9:06:42different.
9:06:43A teacup rattled and rasped against a
9:06:45saucer, and Mor and I glanced over.
9:06:49Elain had picked up the teacup and now
9:06:51sipped from it without so much as
9:06:53looking toward him.
9:06:55In the dining room across the hall, I
9:06:57knew Nesta was craning her neck to look.
9:07:00Knew, because Amren snapped at my sister
9:07:02to pay attention.
9:07:04"They were building walls in their
9:07:06minds," Amren had told me, as she
9:07:09ordered Nesta to sit at the dining room
9:07:10table directly across from her.
9:07:13Walls that Amren was teaching her to
9:07:15sense, to find the holes she'd laid
9:07:17throughout, and repair them.
9:07:20If the fae objects at the Court of
9:07:22Nightmares had not allowed my sister to
9:07:23grasp what must be done, then this was
9:07:26their next attempt, a different,
9:07:28invisible route. "Not all magic was
9:07:31flash and glittering," Amren had
9:07:32declared, and then shooed me out.
9:07:35But any sign of that power within my
9:07:37sister, I did not hear it or see it or
9:07:41feel it. And neither offered any
9:07:43explanation for what it was, exactly,
9:07:45that they were trying to coax from
9:07:47within her.
9:07:48Outside the house, movement again caught
9:07:51our eye, and we found Rhysand and
9:07:53Cassian strolling in through the low
9:07:54front gate, returning from their first
9:07:57meeting with Keir's Darkbringer army
9:07:58commanders, already rallying and
9:08:01preparing.
9:08:02At least that much had gone right
9:08:04yesterday.
9:08:06Both of them spotted us in the window
9:08:07within a heartbeat, stopped cold.
9:08:11"Don't come in," I warned him through
9:08:13the bond. "Lucien is trying to sense
9:08:15what's wrong with Elain through the
9:08:17bond."
9:08:18Rhys murmured what I'd said to Cassian,
9:08:20who now angled his head much in the way
9:08:22I had no doubt Nesta had done to peer
9:08:25beyond us.
9:08:26Rhys said wryly,
9:08:28"Does Elain know this?"
9:08:30"She was invited down for tea, so we're
9:08:33having it."
9:08:35Rhys muttered again to Cassian, who
9:08:37choked on a laugh and turned right
9:08:38around heading into the street.
9:08:41Rhys lingered sliding his hands into his
9:08:43pockets.
9:08:45"He's getting a drink. I'm inclined to
9:08:47join him."
9:08:48"When can I return without fearing for
9:08:50my life?"
9:08:52I gave him a vulgar gesture through the
9:08:53window.
9:08:55"Such a big, strong Illyrian warrior."
9:08:58"Illyrian warriors know when to pick
9:09:00their battles.
9:09:01And with Nesta watching everything like
9:09:03a hawk and you two circling like
9:09:05vultures,
9:09:06I know who will walk away from that
9:09:08fight."
9:09:09I made the gesture again, and Mor
9:09:11figured out enough of what was being
9:09:13said that she echoed the movement. Rhys
9:09:15laughed quietly and sketched a bow.
9:09:18"The High Lords sent replies." I said as
9:09:21he strolled away. "Day, dawn, and winter
9:09:23will come."
9:09:25"I know." He said. "And I just received
9:09:27word from Cressida that Tarquin is
9:09:29contemplating it."
9:09:31"Better than nothing." I said as much.
9:09:34Rhys smiled at me over his shoulder.
9:09:37"Enjoy your tea, you overbearing
9:09:38chaperone."
9:09:40"I could have used a chaperone around
9:09:41you, you realize."
9:09:43"You had four of them in this house."
9:09:46I smiled as he finally reached the low
9:09:48front gate where Cassian waited,
9:09:51apparently using the momentary delay to
9:09:53stretch out his wings to the delight of
9:09:56the half dozen children now gawking at
9:09:58them.
9:09:59Amren hissed from the other room,
9:10:01"Focus."
9:10:02The dining table rattled. The sound
9:10:05seemed to startle Elain, who swiftly set
9:10:07down her teacup. She rose to her feet,
9:10:10and Lucien shot to his.
9:10:12"I'm sorry." He blurted. "What?
9:10:15What was that?"
9:10:17Mor put a hand on my knee to keep me
9:10:18from rising, too.
9:10:20"It It was a tug on the bond." Amren
9:10:24snapped. "Don't you, wicked girl." Then
9:10:27Nesta was standing in the threshold.
9:10:29"What did you do?"
9:10:31The words were as sharp as a blade.
9:10:33Lucien looked to her, then over to me. A
9:10:36muscle feathered in his jaw.
9:10:38"Nothing." He said, and again faced his
9:10:41mate. "I'm sorry if that unsettled you."
9:10:45Elain sidled toward Nesta, who seemed to
9:10:47be at a near simmer.
9:10:49"It felt strange." Elain breathed. "Like
9:10:53you pulled on a thread tied to a rib."
9:10:56Lucien exposed his palms to her. "I'm
9:10:59sorry."
9:11:00Elain only stared at him for a long
9:11:02moment, and any lucidity faded away as
9:11:05she shook her head, blinking twice, and
9:11:07said to Nesta,
9:11:09"Twin ravens are coming.
9:11:11One white and one black."
9:11:13Nesta hid the devastation well, the
9:11:16frustration.
9:11:17"What can I get you, Elain?" Only with
9:11:20Elain did she use that voice.
9:11:22But Elain shook her head once more.
9:11:25"Sunshine."
9:11:26Nesta cut me a furious stare before
9:11:28guiding our sister down the hall to the
9:11:31sunny garden in the back.
9:11:33Lucien waited until the glass door had
9:11:35opened and closed before he loosed a
9:11:37long breath.
9:11:39"There's a bond.
9:11:40It's a real thread." He said, more to
9:11:43himself than us.
9:11:45"And?" Mor asked.
9:11:47Lucien ran both hands through his long
9:11:49red hair.
9:11:50His skin was darker, a deep golden brown
9:11:53compared to the paleness of Eris's
9:11:55coloring.
9:11:57"And I got to Elain's end of it when she
9:11:59ran off."
9:12:00"Did you sense anything?"
9:12:02"No, I didn't have time. I felt her, but
9:12:06A blush stained his cheek. Whatever he'd
9:12:09felt, it wasn't what we were looking
9:12:11for, even if we had no idea what
9:12:13precisely that was.
9:12:15We can try again another day, I offered.
9:12:19Lucien nodded, but looked unconvinced.
9:12:22Amren snapped from the dining room,
9:12:24"Someone go retrieve your sister. Her
9:12:26lesson isn't over."
9:12:28I sighed.
9:12:29Yes, Amren.
9:12:31Lucien's attention slid behind me to the
9:12:33various letters on different styles and
9:12:36makes of paper.
9:12:37That golden eye narrowed.
9:12:39As Tamlin's emissary, he no doubt
9:12:41recognized them.
9:12:43Let me guess. They said yes, but picking
9:12:46the location is now going to be the
9:12:48headache.
9:12:49Mor frowned. Any suggestions?
9:12:52Lucien tied back his hair with a strap
9:12:54of brown leather.
9:12:56Do you have a map?
9:12:58I suppose that left me to retrieve
9:13:00Nesta.
9:13:03That pine tree wasn't there a moment
9:13:05ago.
9:13:06Azriel let out a quiet laugh from where
9:13:08he sat atop a boulder two days later
9:13:11watching me pluck pine needles out of my
9:13:13hair and jacket.
9:13:15Judging by its size, I'd say it's been
9:13:17there for 200 years at least.
9:13:21I scowled brushing off the shards of
9:13:23bark and my bruised pride.
9:13:26That coldness, that aloofness that had
9:13:28been there in the wake of Mor's anger
9:13:30and rejection. It had warmed either from
9:13:33Mor choosing to sit next to him at
9:13:35dinner last night, a silent offer of
9:13:37forgiveness,
9:13:38or simply needing time to recover from
9:13:40it.
9:13:41Even if I could have sworn some kernel
9:13:43of guilt had flickered every time Azriel
9:13:45had looked at Mor.
9:13:47What Cassian had thought of it, of his
9:13:49own anger toward Azriel.
9:13:52He'd been all smiles and rude comments,
9:13:54glad all was back to normal for now, at
9:13:57least.
9:13:59My cheeks burned as I scaled the boulder
9:14:01he perched on, the drop at least 15 ft
9:14:04to the forest floor below. The lake a
9:14:06sparkling sprawl peaking through the
9:14:08pine trees, including the tree I'd
9:14:11collided with face-first on my latest
9:14:13attempt to leap off the boulder and
9:14:15simply sailed to the lake.
9:14:17I braced my hands on my hips, examining
9:14:20the drop, the trees, the lake beyond.
9:14:24What did I do wrong?
9:14:26Azriel, who had been sharpening
9:14:27Truth-Teller in his lap, flicked his
9:14:29hazel eyes up to me.
9:14:31Aside from the tree.
9:14:33The Shadow Singer had a sense of humor,
9:14:36dry and quiet, but alone together, it
9:14:40came out far more often than it did
9:14:42amongst our group.
9:14:44I'd spent these past two days either
9:14:46pouring over ancient volumes for any
9:14:48hint on repairing the wall to hand over
9:14:50to Amren and Nesta, who continued to
9:14:52silently, invisibly build and mend walls
9:14:54with in their minds,
9:14:56or debating with Rhys and the others
9:14:58about how to reply to the volley of
9:14:59letters now being exchanged with the
9:15:01other High Lords regarding where the
9:15:03meeting would take place.
9:15:05Lucien had indeed given us an initial
9:15:07location, and several more when those
9:15:10were struck down, but that was to be
9:15:12expected, Lucien had said, as if he'd
9:15:14arranged such things countless times.
9:15:17Rhys had only nodded in agreement and
9:15:20approval.
9:15:21And when I wasn't doing that, I was
9:15:24combing through more books, any and all
9:15:26Clotho could find me, all regarding the
9:15:29Ouroboros, how to master it.
9:15:32The mirror was notorious. Every known
9:15:34philosopher had ruminated on it. Some
9:15:37had dared face it and gone mad. Some had
9:15:40approached and run away in terror.
9:15:43I could not find an account of anyone
9:15:45who had mastered it, faced what lurked
9:15:47within and walked away with the mirror
9:15:49in their possession,
9:15:51save for the Weaver in the wood, who
9:15:53certainly seemed insane enough, perhaps
9:15:55thanks to the mirror she'd so dearly
9:15:57loved.
9:15:58Or perhaps whatever evil lurked in her
9:16:00had tainted the mirror, too.
9:16:03Some of the philosophers had suggested
9:16:05as much, though they hadn't known her
9:16:07name, [clears throat]
9:16:08only that a dark queen had once
9:16:09possessed it, cherished it, spied on the
9:16:12world with it, and used it to hunt down
9:16:15beautiful young maidens to keep her
9:16:17eternally young.
9:16:19I suppose Kier's family owning the
9:16:21ouroboros for millennia suggested the
9:16:23success rate of walking away was low.
9:16:26It was not heartening.
9:16:28Not when all the texts agreed on one
9:16:30thing.
9:16:31There was no way around it, no loophole.
9:16:34Facing the terror within,
9:16:36that was the only route to claim it.
9:16:39Which meant I perhaps had to consider
9:16:41alternatives, other ways to entice the
9:16:43bone carver to join us when I found a
9:16:46moment.
9:16:47Azriel sheathed his legendary fighting
9:16:49knife and examined the wings I'd spread
9:16:51wide.
9:16:52You're trying to steer with your arms.
9:16:55The muscles are in the wings themselves
9:16:57and in your back. Your arms are
9:16:59unnecessary. They're more for balancing
9:17:02than anything, and even that's mostly a
9:17:04mental comfort.
9:17:06It was more words than I'd ever heard
9:17:08from him.
9:17:09He lifted a brow at my gaping, and I
9:17:11shut my mouth.
9:17:13I frowned at the drop ahead.
9:17:15Again? I grumbled. A soft laugh.
9:17:19We can find a lower ledge to jump from
9:17:21if you want.
9:17:23I cringed. You said this was low.
9:17:26Azriel leaned back on his hands and
9:17:28waited. Patient, cool.
9:17:31But I felt the bark tear into my palms,
9:17:33the thud of my knees into its rough
9:17:35side.
9:17:37You are immortal, he said quietly. You
9:17:40are very hard to break. A pause. That's
9:17:43what I told myself.
9:17:45Hard to break, I said glumly, "but it
9:17:48still hurts."
9:17:50"Tell that to the tree."
9:17:51I huffed a laugh.
9:17:53"I know the drop isn't far, and I know
9:17:55it won't kill me.
9:17:57Can't you just push me?"
9:17:59For it was that initial leap of utter
9:18:01faith, that initial lurch into motion
9:18:03that had my limbs locking up.
9:18:06"No."
9:18:07A simple answer.
9:18:08I still hesitated.
9:18:10Useless, this fear. I had faced down the
9:18:14Ador, falling through the sky for a
9:18:16thousand feet,
9:18:17and the rage at its memory, at what it
9:18:20had done with its miserable life, what
9:18:22more like it might do again, had me
9:18:24gritting my teeth and sprinting off the
9:18:26boulder.
9:18:27I snapped my wings out wide, my back
9:18:30protesting as they caught the wind, but
9:18:32my lower half began to drop, my legs a
9:18:34dead weight as my core yielded.
9:18:37The infernal tree rose up before me, and
9:18:39I swerved hard to the right.
9:18:41Right into another tree, wings first.
9:18:45The sound of bone and sinew on wood,
9:18:47then earth, hit me before the pain did.
9:18:50So did Azriel's soft curse.
9:18:53A small noise came out of me. The
9:18:55stinging of my palms registered first,
9:18:58then in my knees, then my back.
9:19:01"Shit." Was all I could say as Azriel
9:19:04knelt before me.
9:19:06"You're all right, just stunned."
9:19:08The world was still reordering itself.
9:19:11"You banked well," he offered,
9:19:14"into another tree."
9:19:16"Being aware of your surroundings is
9:19:17half of flying."
9:19:19"You said that already," I snapped. He
9:19:22had a dozen times just this morning.
9:19:25Azriel only sat on his heels and offered
9:19:27me a hand up.
9:19:29My flesh burned as I gripped his
9:19:31fingers, a mortifying number of pine
9:19:33needles and splinters tumbling off me.
9:19:36My back throbbed enough that I lowered
9:19:38my wings, not caring if they dragged in
9:19:40the dirt as Azriel led me toward the
9:19:42lake edge.
9:19:44In the blinding sun off the turquoise
9:19:46water, his shadows were gone. His face
9:19:49stark and clear, more human than I had
9:19:52ever seen him.
9:19:55"There's no chance that I'll be able to
9:19:56fly in the legions, is there?" I asked,
9:19:59kneeling beside him as he tended to my
9:20:01skinned palms with expert care and
9:20:03gentleness.
9:20:05The sun was brutal against his scars,
9:20:07hiding not one twisted, rippling
9:20:09splotch.
9:20:11"Likely not," he said. My chest hollowed
9:20:13out at that.
9:20:15"But it doesn't hurt to practice until
9:20:17the last possible moment. You never know
9:20:19when any measure of training may be
9:20:21useful."
9:20:23I winced as he fished out a large
9:20:24splinter from my palm, then washed it
9:20:27clean.
9:20:28"It was very hard for me to learn how to
9:20:30fly," he said.
9:20:32I didn't dare respond.
9:20:34"Most Illyrians learn as toddlers, but
9:20:37I assume Rhysand told you the
9:20:39particulars of my early childhood."
9:20:42I nodded. He finished the one hand and
9:20:44started on the other.
9:20:46"Because I was so old, I had a fear of
9:20:49flying and did not trust my instincts.
9:20:52It was an embarrassment to be taught so
9:20:54late. Not just to me, but to all in the
9:20:57war camp once I arrived. But I learned,
9:21:01often going off by myself.
9:21:03Cassian, of course, found me first,
9:21:06mocked me, beat me to hell, then offered
9:21:08to train me.
9:21:10Rhys was there the next day.
9:21:12They taught me to fly."
9:21:14He finished my other hand and sat on the
9:21:16shore, the stones murmuring as they
9:21:19shifted beneath him.
9:21:20I sat beside him, bracing my sore palms
9:21:23face up on my knees, letting my wings
9:21:26sag behind me.
9:21:28"Because it was such an effort, a few
9:21:31years after the war, Rhys brought me
9:21:32back a story.
9:21:34It was a gift, the story, for me. He
9:21:39He went to see Miriam and Drakon in
9:21:40their new home. The visit so secret,
9:21:43even we hadn't known it was happening
9:21:45until he returned.
9:21:47We knew their people hadn't drowned in
9:21:48the sea, as everyone believed, as they
9:21:51wanted people to believe.
9:21:53You see, when Miriam freed her people
9:21:56from the Queen of the Black Land, she
9:21:58led all of them, nearly 50,000 of them,
9:22:01across the desert, all the way to the
9:22:03shores of the Erythraean Sea. Drakon's
9:22:06aerial legion providing cover.
9:22:08But they got to the sea and found the
9:22:11ships they'd arranged to transport them
9:22:13over the narrow channel to the next
9:22:14kingdom had been destroyed. Destroyed by
9:22:17the Queen herself, who sent her
9:22:19lingering armies to drag her former
9:22:21slaves back.
9:22:23Drakon's people, the Seraphim, are
9:22:26winged, like us, but their wings are
9:22:28feathered. And unlike us, their army and
9:22:32society allow women to lead, to fight,
9:22:35to rule.
9:22:37All of them are gifted with mighty magic
9:22:39of wind and air.
9:22:40And when they beheld that army charging
9:22:42after them, they knew their own force
9:22:44was too small to face them. So, they
9:22:47cleaved the sea itself, made a path
9:22:50through the water, all the way through
9:22:52the channel, and ordered the humans to
9:22:54run.
9:22:55They did, but Miriam insisted on
9:22:57remaining behind until every last one of
9:22:59her people had crossed.
9:23:01Not one human would she leave behind,
9:23:04not one.
9:23:06They were about halfway through the
9:23:07crossing when the army reached them.
9:23:10The Seraphim were spent. Their magic
9:23:12could barely hold the sea passage, and
9:23:14Drakon knew that if they held it any
9:23:16longer,
9:23:17that army would make it across and
9:23:19butcher the humans on the other side.
9:23:22The Seraphim fought off the vanguard on
9:23:24the floor of the sea, and it was bloody
9:23:26and brutal and chaotic.
9:23:29And during the melee, they didn't see
9:23:31Miriam skewered by the queen herself.
9:23:33Dracon didn't see.
9:23:35He thought she made it out carried by
9:23:37one of his soldiers.
9:23:39He ordered the parted sea to come down
9:23:41to drown the enemy force.
9:23:43But a young seraphim cartographer named
9:23:46Nephil saw Miriam go down.
9:23:49Nephil's lover was one of Dracon's
9:23:50generals and it was she who realized
9:23:53Miriam and Nephil were missing.
9:23:55Dracon was frantic but their magic was
9:23:58spent and no force in the world could
9:24:00hold back the sea as it barreled down
9:24:02and no one could reach his mate in time.
9:24:05But Nephil did.
9:24:07Nephil, you see, was a cartographer
9:24:10because she'd been rejected from the
9:24:11legion's fighting ranks. Her wings were
9:24:14too small, the right one somewhat
9:24:16malformed. And she was slight, short
9:24:20enough that she'd be a dangerous gap in
9:24:21the front lines when they fought shield
9:24:23to shield.
9:24:25Dracon had let her try out for the
9:24:26legion as a courtesy to her lover.
9:24:29But Nephil failed. She could barely
9:24:31carry the seraphim shield and her
9:24:33smaller wings hadn't been strong enough
9:24:35to keep up with the others.
9:24:37So she had made herself invaluable as a
9:24:40cartographer during the war.
9:24:42Helping Dracon and her lover find the
9:24:44geographical advantages in their
9:24:45battles.
9:24:47And she became Miriam's dearest friend
9:24:49during those long months as well.
9:24:52And that day on the sea floor,
9:24:55Nephil remembered that her friend had
9:24:56been in the back of the line. She
9:24:58returned for her even as all others fled
9:25:01for the distant shore. She found Miriam
9:25:04skewered on the queen's spear bleeding
9:25:06out. The sea wall started to come down
9:25:09on the opposite shore killing the
9:25:11approaching army first racing toward
9:25:13them.
9:25:15Miriam told Nephil to save herself but
9:25:18Nephil would not abandon her friend. She
9:25:20picked her up and flew.
9:25:23Azriel's voice was soft with awe.
9:25:27When Ree spoke to Drakon about it years
9:25:29later, he still didn't have words to
9:25:31describe what happened. It defied all
9:25:34logic, all training. Nephil, who had
9:25:37never been strong enough to hold a
9:25:39seraphim's shield, carried Miriam,
9:25:41triple the weight, and more than that,
9:25:44she flew.
9:25:46The sea was crashing down upon them, but
9:25:48Nephil flew like the best of seraphim
9:25:51warriors.
9:25:52The seafloor was a labyrinth of jagged
9:25:54rocks, too narrow for the seraphim to
9:25:56fly through. They'd tried during their
9:25:58escape and crashed into them,
9:26:01but Nephil, with her smaller wings,
9:26:04had they been 1 in wider, she would not
9:26:07have fit. And more than that, Nephil
9:26:10soared through them, Miriam dying in her
9:26:12arms, as fast and skilled as the
9:26:14greatest of seraphim.
9:26:16Nephil, who had been passed over, who
9:26:19had been forgotten, she outraced death
9:26:22itself.
9:26:23There was not a foot of room between her
9:26:25and the water on either side of her when
9:26:27she shot up from the seafloor, not half
9:26:30of that rising up at her feet. And yet
9:26:32her two small wingspan, that deformed
9:26:35wing,
9:26:36they did not fail her, not once, not for
9:26:40one wingbeat.
9:26:42My eyes burned.
9:26:44She made it. Suffice to say her lover
9:26:47made Nephil her wife that night, and
9:26:49Miriam,
9:26:50well,
9:26:51she is alive today because of Nephil.
9:26:54Azriel picked up a flat white stone and
9:26:57turned it over in his hands.
9:26:59Reese told me the story when he
9:27:01returned. And since then, we have
9:27:03privately adopted the Nephil philosophy
9:27:06with our own armies.
9:27:08I raised a brow. Azriel shrugged. We,
9:27:12Reese, Cass, and I, will occasionally
9:27:14remind each other that what we think to
9:27:16be our greatest weakness can sometimes
9:27:19be our biggest strength,
9:27:21and that the most unlikely person can
9:27:23alter the course of history.
9:27:26The Nefel philosophy.
9:27:28He nodded.
9:27:29Apparently, every year in their kingdom,
9:27:32they have the Nefel run to honor her
9:27:34flight. On dry land, but
9:27:37she and her wife crown a new victor
9:27:39every year in commemoration of what
9:27:41happened that day.
9:27:43He chucked the stone back amongst its
9:27:44brethren on the shore, the sound
9:27:46clattering over the water.
9:27:49So, we'll train Feyre until the last
9:27:52possible day
9:27:54because we never know if just one extra
9:27:56hour will make the difference.
9:27:59I weighed his words, Nefel's story.
9:28:02I rose to my feet and spread my wings.
9:28:06Then let's try again.
9:28:10I groaned as I limped into our bedroom
9:28:12that night to find Rhys sitting at the
9:28:14desk, pouring over more books.
9:28:17I warned you that Azriel is a hard
9:28:18bastard, he said without looking at me.
9:28:21He lifted a hand and water gurgled in
9:28:24the adjacent bathing room.
9:28:26I grumbled a thank you and trudged
9:28:28toward it, gritting my teeth against the
9:28:30agony in my back, my thighs, my bones.
9:28:34Every part hurt, and since the muscles
9:28:36needed to reform around the wings, I had
9:28:39to carry them, too.
9:28:41Their scraping along the wood and
9:28:42carpet, then wood again, was the only
9:28:45sound beyond my weary feet.
9:28:47I beheld the steaming bath that would
9:28:49require some balancing to get into and
9:28:52whimpered.
9:28:53Even removing my clothes would entail
9:28:55using muscles that had nearly given out.
9:28:58A chair scraped in the bedroom, followed
9:29:00by cat-soft feet, then
9:29:03I'm sure you already know this, but you
9:29:05need to actually climb into a bath to
9:29:07get clean, not stare at it.
9:29:10I didn't have the strength to even glare
9:29:12at him, and I managed all of one
9:29:14stumbling stiff step toward the water
9:29:17when he caught me.
9:29:18My clothes vanished, presumably to the
9:29:21laundry downstairs, and Rhys swept me
9:29:23into his arms, lowering my naked body
9:29:26into the water.
9:29:27With the wings, the fit was tight, and
9:29:30I groaned from deep in my throat at the
9:29:32glorious heat, and didn't bother to do
9:29:35anything other than lean my head against
9:29:37the back of the tub.
9:29:39"I'll be right back." he said, and left
9:29:41the bathroom, then the bedroom itself.
9:29:44By the time he returned, I only knew I'd
9:29:47fallen asleep thanks to the hand he put
9:29:49on my shoulder.
9:29:50"Out." he said, but lifted me himself,
9:29:53towelled me off, and led me to the bed.
9:29:57He laid me down belly first, and I noted
9:29:59the oils and balms he'd set there, the
9:30:02faint odor of rosemary and
9:30:05something I was too tired to notice, but
9:30:07smelled lovely floating to me.
9:30:09His hands gleamed as he applied generous
9:30:12amounts to his palms, and then his hands
9:30:14were on me.
9:30:16My groan was about as undignified as
9:30:18they came, as he kneaded the aching
9:30:20muscles of my back.
9:30:22The sorer areas drew out rather
9:30:24pathetic-sounding whimpers, but he
9:30:26rubbed them gently until the tension was
9:30:28a dull ache rather than sharp, blinding
9:30:31pain.
9:30:32And then he started on my wings.
9:30:35Relief and ecstasy as muscles eased and
9:30:38those sensitive areas were lovingly,
9:30:40tauntingly grazed over. My toes curled,
9:30:44and just as he reached the sensitive
9:30:45spot that had my stomach clenching, his
9:30:48hands slid to my calves.
9:30:50He began a slow progression, higher and
9:30:52higher up my thighs, teasing strokes
9:30:55between them that left me panting
9:30:57through my nose, rising up until he got
9:31:00to my backside, where his massaging was
9:31:02equally professional and sinful.
9:31:05And then up, up my lower back to my
9:31:08wings.
9:31:09His touch turned different, exploring,
9:31:12broad strokes and feather-light ones, a
9:31:14arches and swirls and direct searing
9:31:17lines.
9:31:18My core heated, turning molten, and I
9:31:21bit down on my lip as he lightly scraped
9:31:23a fingernail so, so close to that inner
9:31:26sensitive spot.
9:31:28"Too bad you're so sore from training."
9:31:30Rhys mused, making idle, lazy circles.
9:31:34I could only manage a garbled strand of
9:31:36words that were both plea and insult.
9:31:39He leaned in, his breath warming the
9:31:41space of skin between my wings.
9:31:44"Did I ever tell you that you have the
9:31:45dirtiest mouth I've ever heard?"
9:31:48I muttered words that only offered more
9:31:50proof of that claim.
9:31:52He chuckled and skimmed the edge of that
9:31:54sensitive spot, right as his other hand
9:31:56slid between my legs.
9:31:59Brazenly, I lifted my hips in silent
9:32:01demand, but he just circled with a
9:32:04finger as lazy as the strokes along my
9:32:07wing. He kissed my spine. "How shall I
9:32:10make love to you tonight, Feyre,
9:32:12darling?"
9:32:13I writhed, rubbing against the folds of
9:32:16the blanket beneath me, desperate for
9:32:18any sort of friction as he dangled me
9:32:20over that edge. "So impatient." he
9:32:23purred, and that finger glided into me.
9:32:26I moaned, the sensation too much, too
9:32:29consuming. With his hand between my legs
9:32:31and the other stroking closer and closer
9:32:33to that spot on my wing, a predator
9:32:36circling prey.
9:32:38"Will it ever stop?" he mused, more to
9:32:41himself than me, as another finger
9:32:43joined the one sliding in and out of me
9:32:45with taunting, indolent strokes.
9:32:48"Wanting you, every hour, every breath.
9:32:52I don't think I can stand a thousand
9:32:54years of this."
9:32:55My hips moved with him, driving him
9:32:57deeper.
9:32:58"Think of how my productivity will
9:33:00plummet."
9:33:01I growled something at him that was
9:33:03likely not very romantic, and he
9:33:05chuckled, slipping out both fingers. I
9:33:08made a little whining noise of protest
9:33:11until his mouth replaced where his
9:33:12fingers had been, his hands gripping my
9:33:15hips to raise me up to lend him better
9:33:17access as he feasted on me. I groaned,
9:33:21the sound muffled by the pillow, and he
9:33:23only delved deeper, taunting and teasing
9:33:26with every stroke. A low moan broke from
9:33:29me, my hips rolling. Rhys's grip on them
9:33:32tightened, holding me still for his
9:33:34ministrations.
9:33:36"I never got to take you in the
9:33:37library," he said, dragging his tongue
9:33:40right up my center.
9:33:42"We'll have to remedy that."
9:33:44"Rhys." His name was a plea on my lips.
9:33:47"Mhm."
9:33:48Was all he said, a rumble of the sound
9:33:51against me. I panted, hands fisting in
9:33:54the sheets.
9:33:55His hands drifted from my hips at last,
9:33:57and I again breathed his name in thanks
9:34:00and relief and anticipation of him at
9:34:02last giving me what I wanted.
9:34:05But his mouth closed around the bundle
9:34:07of nerves at the apex of my thighs,
9:34:09while his hand he went right to that
9:34:12damned spot at the inner edge of my left
9:34:14wing and stroked lightly.
9:34:17My climax tore through me with a hoarse
9:34:19cry, sending me soaring out of my body,
9:34:22and when the shuddering ripples and
9:34:24starlight faded
9:34:26a bone-weary exhaustion settled over me,
9:34:29permanent and unending as the mating
9:34:31bond between us.
9:34:33Rhys curled into bed behind me, tucking
9:34:36my wings in so he could fold me against
9:34:38him.
9:34:39"That was a fun experiment," he murmured
9:34:41into my ear.
9:34:43I could feel him against my backside,
9:34:45hard and ready. But when I made to reach
9:34:48for him, Rhys's arms only tightened
9:34:50around me.
9:34:52"Sleep, Feyre," he told me.
9:34:55So I laid a hand on his forearm,
9:34:57savoring the corded strength beneath,
9:35:00and nestled my head back against his
9:35:02chest.
9:35:04"I wish I had days to spend with you
9:35:06like this." I managed to say as my
9:35:09eyelids drooped.
9:35:11"Just me and you."
9:35:13"We will." He kissed my hair.
9:35:16"We will."
9:35:21Chapter 30
9:35:24I was still sore enough the next day
9:35:26that I had to send word to Cassian I
9:35:27wasn't training with him or Azriel.
9:35:31A mistake perhaps, given that both of
9:35:33them showed up at the door to the
9:35:34townhouse within minutes. The former
9:35:37demanding what the hell was wrong with
9:35:38me, the latter bearing a tin of salve to
9:35:41help with the aches in my back. I
9:35:43thanked Azriel for the salve and told
9:35:45Cassian to mind his own business.
9:35:47And then asked him to fly Nesta up to
9:35:49the House of Wind for me, since I
9:35:51certainly couldn't fly her in, even for
9:35:53a few feet after winnowing.
9:35:56My sister, it seemed, had found nothing
9:35:59in her books about repairing the wall.
9:36:01And since no one had yet shown her the
9:36:03library, I'd volunteered. Especially
9:36:06since Lucien had left before breakfast
9:36:08for a library across the city to look up
9:36:10anything in regard to fixing the wall, a
9:36:13task I'd been more than willing to hand
9:36:15over.
9:36:16I might have felt guilty for never
9:36:18giving him a proper tour of Velaris, but
9:36:21he seemed eager. More than eager. He
9:36:24seemed to be itching to head into the
9:36:26city on his own.
9:36:28The two Illyrians paused their
9:36:30inspection of me long enough to note my
9:36:32sister's finishing up breakfast. Nesta
9:36:34in a pale gray gown that brought out the
9:36:36steel in her eyes, Elain in dusty pink.
9:36:40Both males went a bit still.
9:36:43But Azriel sketched a bow while Cassian
9:36:46stalked for the dining table, reached
9:36:47right over Nesta's shoulder, and grabbed
9:36:49a muffin from its little basket.
9:36:52"Morning, Nesta." He said around a mouth
9:36:54of blueberry lemon. "Elain."
9:36:57Nesta's nostrils flared, but Elain
9:36:59peered up at Cassian, blinking twice.
9:37:02"He snapped your wings,
9:37:04broke your bones."
9:37:06I tried to shut out the sound of
9:37:07Cassian's scream, the memory of the
9:37:09spraying blood.
9:37:11Nesta stared at her plate. Elain, at
9:37:13least, was out of her room, but
9:37:16"It'll take more than that to kill me."
9:37:18Cassian said with a smirk that didn't
9:37:20meet his eyes.
9:37:21Elain only said to Cassian, "No.
9:37:25It will not."
9:37:26Cassian's dark brown eyes narrowed. I
9:37:29dragged a hand over my face before going
9:37:31to Elain and touching her two bony
9:37:34shoulder.
9:37:35"Can I set you up in the garden? The
9:37:37herbs you planted are coming in nicely."
9:37:40"I can help her." Azriel said, stepping
9:37:42to the table as Elain silently rose. No
9:37:45shadows at his ear, no darkness ringing
9:37:48his fingers as he extended a hand.
9:37:51Nesta monitored him like a hawk, but
9:37:54kept silent as Elain took his hand and
9:37:56out they went.
9:37:58Cassian finished the muffin, licking his
9:38:00fingers. I could have sworn Nesta
9:38:03watched the entire thing with a sidelong
9:38:05glance.
9:38:06He grinned at her as if he knew it, too.
9:38:09"Ready for some flying, Ness?" "Don't
9:38:11call me that."
9:38:13The wrong thing to say, from the way
9:38:15Cassian's eyes lit up.
9:38:17I chose that moment to winnow to the
9:38:19skies above the house, chuckling as wind
9:38:22carried me through the world. Some
9:38:24sisterly payback, I supposed, for
9:38:26Nesta's general attitude.
9:38:29Mercifully, no one saw my slightly
9:38:31better crash landing on the veranda. And
9:38:34by the time Cassian's dark figure
9:38:35appeared in the sky, Nesta's hair,
9:38:38bright as bronze in the morning sun,
9:38:40I'd brushed off the dirt and dust from
9:38:42my leathers.
9:38:44My sister's face was wind-flushed as
9:38:46Cassian gently set her down.
9:38:48Then she strode for the glass doors
9:38:50without a single look back.
9:38:52"You're welcome." Cassian called after
9:38:55her, more than a bite to his voice.
9:38:57His hands clenched and slackened at his
9:38:59sides, as if he were trying to loosen
9:39:01the feel of her from his palms.
9:39:04"Thank you." I said to him.
9:39:06But Cassian didn't bother saying
9:39:08farewell as he launched skyward and
9:39:10vanished into the clouds.
9:39:13The library beneath the house was
9:39:15shadowed, quiet. The doors opened for us
9:39:18the same way they'd opened when Rhys and
9:39:20I had first visited.
9:39:22Nesta said nothing, only surveying every
9:39:24stack and alcove and dangling
9:39:26chandelier, as I led her down to the
9:39:28level where Clotho had found those
9:39:30books.
9:39:31I showed her the small reading area
9:39:33where I'd been stationed and gestured to
9:39:35the desk.
9:39:37"I know Cassian gets under your skin,
9:39:39but I'm curious, too.
9:39:41How do you know what to look for in
9:39:43regard to the wall?"
9:39:45Nesta ran a finger over the ancient wood
9:39:47desk.
9:39:48"Because I just do."
9:39:50"How?"
9:39:51"I don't know how. Amren told me to just
9:39:55see if the information clicks."
9:39:58And perhaps that frightened her,
9:39:59intrigued her, but frightened her.
9:40:02And she hadn't told Cassian not out of
9:40:04spite, but because she didn't wish to
9:40:06reveal that vulnerability, that lack of
9:40:08control.
9:40:10I didn't push, even as I stared at her
9:40:12for a long moment. I didn't know how,
9:40:16how to broach that subject, how to ask
9:40:18if she was all right, if I could help
9:40:20her.
9:40:21I had never been affectionate with her.
9:40:23I'd never held her, kissed her cheek. I
9:40:26didn't know where to begin.
9:40:28So I just said, "Rhys gave me a layout
9:40:30of the stacks. I think there might be
9:40:32more on the Cauldron and Wall a few
9:40:34levels down.
9:40:35You can wait here, or I'll help you
9:40:38look."
9:40:39We followed the sloping path in silence,
9:40:42the rustle of paper and the occasional
9:40:43whisper of a priestess's robes along the
9:40:45stone floors the only sounds.
9:40:49I quietly explained to her who the
9:40:50priestesses were, why they were here.
9:40:53I explained that Rhys and I planned to
9:40:55offer sanctuary to any humans who could
9:40:57make it to Velaris.
9:40:59She said nothing, quieter and quieter as
9:41:02we descended. That black pit on my right
9:41:04seeming to grow thicker the deeper we
9:41:06went.
9:41:08But we reached a path of stacks that
9:41:10veered into the mountain in a long hall,
9:41:12faylights flickering into life within
9:41:14glass globes along the wall as we
9:41:16passed.
9:41:17Nesta scanned the shelves while we
9:41:19walked, and I read the titles a bit more
9:41:22slowly, still needing a little time to
9:41:24process what was instinct for my sister.
9:41:28"I didn't know you couldn't really
9:41:29read." Nesta said as she paused before a
9:41:33nondescript section, noticing the way I
9:41:35silently sounded out the words of a
9:41:37title.
9:41:38"I didn't know where you were in your
9:41:40lessons when it all happened.
9:41:43I assumed you could read as easily as
9:41:45us."
9:41:46"Well?"
9:41:47"I couldn't."
9:41:49"Why didn't you ask us to teach you?"
9:41:51I trailed a finger over the neat row of
9:41:53spines.
9:41:54"Because I doubted you would agree to
9:41:56help."
9:41:57Nesta stiffened like I'd hit her,
9:41:59coldness blooming in those eyes. She
9:42:02tugged a book from a shelf.
9:42:04"Amren said Rhysand taught you to read."
9:42:07My cheeks heated.
9:42:09"He did."
9:42:10And there, deep beneath the world, with
9:42:13only darkness for company, I asked,
9:42:16"Why do you push everyone away but
9:42:17Elain?"
9:42:19"Why have you always pushed me away?"
9:42:22Some emotion guttered in her eyes. Her
9:42:24throat bobbed. Nesta shut her eyes for a
9:42:27moment, breathing in sharply.
9:42:29"Because"
9:42:31the words stopped.
9:42:33I felt it at the same moment she did,
9:42:35the ripple and tremor, like
9:42:38like some piece of the world shifted,
9:42:40like some off-kilter chord had been
9:42:42plucked.
9:42:43We turned toward the illuminated path
9:42:45that we'd just taken through the stacks,
9:42:47then to the dark far, far beyond.
9:42:51The faylights along the ceiling began to
9:42:53sputter and die one by one closer and
9:42:57closer to us.
9:42:59I only had an Illyrian knife at my side.
9:43:02"What is that?" Nesta breathed. "Run."
9:43:05Was all I said. I didn't give her the
9:43:07chance to object as I grabbed her by the
9:43:10elbow and sprinted into the stacks
9:43:12ahead. Faylights flickered to life as we
9:43:14passed only to be devoured by the dark
9:43:17surging for us. Slow. My sister was so
9:43:20damned slow with her dress, her general
9:43:22lack of exercising. "Reese!"
9:43:25Nothing.
9:43:26If the wards around the prison were
9:43:28thick enough to keep out communication,
9:43:30perhaps the same applied here.
9:43:33A wall approached with a hall before it,
9:43:35a second slope left rising, right
9:43:38plunging down.
9:43:40Darkness slithered down from above, but
9:43:42the inky gloom leading deeper fresh and
9:43:45open.
9:43:46I went right. "Faster." I said to her.
9:43:50If we could lead whoever it was deep,
9:43:52perhaps we could cut back right to the
9:43:53pit. I could winnow.
9:43:56Winnow. I could winnow now. I grabbed
9:43:58for Nesta's arm
9:44:00right as the darkness behind us paused
9:44:03and two high fae stepped out of it, both
9:44:05male.
9:44:07One dark-haired, one light. Both in gray
9:44:10jackets embroidered with bone-white
9:44:11thread.
9:44:12I knew their code of arms on the upper
9:44:14right shoulder, knew their dead eyes.
9:44:17Hybern. Hybern was here.
9:44:20I didn't move fast enough as one of them
9:44:21blew out a breath toward us. As that
9:44:24blue faebane dust sprayed into my eyes,
9:44:27my mouth, and my magic died out.
9:44:30Nesta's gasp told me she felt something
9:44:32similar.
9:44:33But it was on my sister that the two
9:44:35focused as I staggered back, tears
9:44:37streaming the dust from my eyes,
9:44:39spitting out the faebane. I gripped her
9:44:41arm trying to winnow. Nothing.
9:44:45Behind them, a hooded priestess slumped
9:44:47to the ground. "So easy to get into
9:44:49their minds once our master let us
9:44:51through the wards." Said one of them,
9:44:54the dark-haired male. "To make them
9:44:56think we were scholars. We planned to
9:44:59come for you."
9:45:00"But it seems you found us first." "I'll
9:45:03spoken to my sister." Nesta's face was
9:45:05near white, though her eyes showed no
9:45:07fear. "Who are you?"
9:45:11The white-haired one smiled broadly as
9:45:12they approached. "We're the king's
9:45:15ravens, his far-flying eyes and talons,
9:45:18and we've come to take you back."
9:45:21The king, their master, he'd Mother
9:45:24above, was the king here in Velaris?
9:45:28Rhys! I slammed a mental hand into the
9:45:30bond over and over. Rhys!
9:45:33Nothing.
9:45:35Nesta's breath began to come quickly.
9:45:37Swords hung at their sides, two a piece.
9:45:40Their shoulders were broad, arms wide
9:45:42enough to indicate muscle filled those
9:45:44fine clothes.
9:45:46"You're not taking her anywhere." I
9:45:48said, palming my knife. How had the king
9:45:51done it, arrived here unnoted and
9:45:53fractured our wards? And if he was in
9:45:55Velaris
9:45:57I shoved down my terror at the thought
9:45:59and what he might be doing beyond this
9:46:01library, unseen and hidden.
9:46:04"You're an unexpected prize, too." The
9:46:07black-haired one said to me.
9:46:09"But your sister."
9:46:11A smile that showed all of his two white
9:46:12teeth. "You took something from that
9:46:15cauldron, girl." "The king wants it
9:46:18back."
9:46:19That was why the cauldron couldn't
9:46:21shatter the wall, not because its power
9:46:23was spent,
9:46:24but because Nesta had stolen too much of
9:46:27it.
9:46:31Chapter 31
9:46:34I laid my options before me. I doubted
9:46:36the king's ravens were stupid enough to
9:46:38be kept talking long enough for my
9:46:40powers to return. And if the king was
9:46:42indeed here, I had to warn everyone
9:46:45immediately.
9:46:47It left me with three choices.
9:46:49Take them on in hand-to-hand combat with
9:46:51only a knife when they were each armed
9:46:53with twin blades and were muscled enough
9:46:55to know how to use them,
9:46:57make a run for it and try to get out of
9:46:59the library and risk the lives and
9:47:02further trauma of the priestesses in the
9:47:03levels above,
9:47:05or
9:47:07Nesta was saying to them, "If he wants
9:47:09what I took, he can come get it
9:47:11himself."
9:47:13"He's too busy to bother." The
9:47:15white-haired male purred, advancing
9:47:17another step. "Apparently, you're not."
9:47:20I gripped Nesta's fingers in my free
9:47:22hand. She glanced at me. "I need you to
9:47:25trust me." I tried to convey to her.
9:47:27Nesta read the emotion in my eyes and
9:47:30gave the barest dip of her chin.
9:47:32I said to them,
9:47:34"You made a grave mistake coming here,
9:47:36to my house."
9:47:38They sniggered. I gave them a returning
9:47:40smirk as I said,
9:47:42"And I hope it rips you into bloody
9:47:44ribbons."
9:47:45Then I ran, hauling Nesta with me, not
9:47:48toward the upper levels, but down, down
9:47:51into the eternal blackness of the pit at
9:47:53the heart of the library
9:47:55and into the arms of whatever lurked
9:47:57inside it.
9:48:00Around and down, around and down,
9:48:03shelves and paper and furniture and
9:48:05darkness, the smell turning musty and
9:48:07damp, the air thickening, the darkness
9:48:09like dew on my skin.
9:48:12Nesta's breath was ragged, her skirts
9:48:14rustling with each sprinting step we
9:48:15took. Time, only a matter of time before
9:48:18one of those priestesses contacted
9:48:20Reese, but even a minute might be too
9:48:23late. There was no choice, none.
9:48:26Faelight stopped appearing ahead. Low,
9:48:29hideous laughter trickled behind us.
9:48:31Not so easy, is it, to find your way in
9:48:34the dark? Don't stop, I panted to Nesta,
9:48:38flinging us farther into the dark. A
9:48:41high-pitched scratching sounded like
9:48:43talons on stone. One of the ravens
9:48:45crooned, Do you know what happened to
9:48:47them? The queens. Keep going, I
9:48:51breathed, gripping a hand against the
9:48:53wall to remain rooted. Soon. We'd reach
9:48:56the bottom soon, and then
9:48:58and then face some horror awful enough
9:49:00that Cassian wouldn't speak of it.
9:49:02The lesser of two evils or the worst of
9:49:05them. The youngest one, that
9:49:07pinched-faced [ __ ] went into the
9:49:09cauldron first. Practically trampled the
9:49:12others to get in after it saw what it
9:49:13did to you and your sister.
9:49:16Don't stop, I repeated as Nesta
9:49:18stumbled. If I go down, you run.
9:49:21That was a choice that I did not need to
9:49:23debate. That did not frighten me. Not
9:49:25for a heartbeat. Stone screamed beneath
9:49:28twin sets of talons. But the cauldron.
9:49:31Oh, it knew that something had been
9:49:33taken from it. Not sentient, but it
9:49:36knew. It was furious. And when that
9:49:39young queen went in, the ravens laughed.
9:49:43Laughed as the slope leveled out and we
9:49:45found ourselves at the bottom of the
9:49:46library.
9:49:48Oh, it gave her immortality. It made her
9:49:50fae. But since something had been taken
9:49:53from it, the cauldron took what she
9:49:56valued most. Her youth. They snickered
9:49:59again. A young woman went in, but a
9:50:02withered crone came out.
9:50:05And from the catacombs of my memory,
9:50:07Elaine's voice sounded. I saw young
9:50:10hands wither with age.
9:50:13The other queens won't go into the
9:50:14cauldron for terror of the same
9:50:16happening now. And the youngest one.
9:50:20Oh, you should hear how she talks, Nesta
9:50:22Archeron. The things she wants to do to
9:50:25you when Hybern is done.
9:50:29Twin ravens are coming.
9:50:31Elaine had known, sensed it, had tried
9:50:33to warn us.
9:50:35There were ancient stacks down here, or
9:50:38at least I felt them as we bumped into
9:50:40countless hard edges in our blind
9:50:41sprint. Where was it? Where was it?
9:50:44Deeper into the dark we ran.
9:50:47"We're growing bored of this pursuit."
9:50:49One of them said. "Our master is waiting
9:50:52for us to retrieve you."
9:50:54I snorted loudly enough for them to
9:50:55hear. I'm shocked he could even muster
9:50:58the strength to break the wards. He
9:51:00seems to need a trove of magical objects
9:51:02to do his work for him.
9:51:04The other one hissed, talons scratching
9:51:07louder. "Whose spellbook do you think
9:51:09Amarantha stole many decades ago?" "Who
9:51:12suggested the amusement of sticking the
9:51:14masks to Spring's faces as punishment?
9:51:17Another little spell, the one he burned
9:51:20through today to crack through your
9:51:22wards here. Only once could it be
9:51:24wielded. Such a pity."
9:51:27I studied the faint trickle of light I
9:51:29could make out, far away and high up.
9:51:32"Run toward the light." I breathed to
9:51:34Nesta. "I'll hold them off." "No."
9:51:37"Don't try to be noble, if that's what
9:51:39you're whispering about." One of the
9:51:41ravens called from behind. "We'll catch
9:51:43you both anyway."
9:51:45We didn't have time for whatever was
9:51:47down here to find us. We didn't have
9:51:49time. "Run." I breathed. "Please." She
9:51:53hesitated. "Please." I begged her, my
9:51:55voice breaking. Nesta squeezed my hand
9:51:58once, and between one breath and the
9:52:00next, she bolted to the side, toward the
9:52:03center of the pit, the light high above.
9:52:05"What?" One of them snapped, but I
9:52:07struck. Every bone in my body barked in
9:52:10pain as I slammed into one of the
9:52:12stacks, then again, again, until it
9:52:15teetered and fell, collapsing onto the
9:52:17one beside it, and the next, and the
9:52:20next, blocking the way Nesta had gone,
9:52:23and any chance of my exit, too. Wood
9:52:26groaned and snapped, books thudded on
9:52:28stone, but ahead, I clawed and patted
9:52:31the wall as I plunged farther into the
9:52:33pit floor. My magic was a husk in my
9:52:36veins.
9:52:37"We'll still catch her, don't worry."
9:52:39One of them crooned. "Wouldn't want dear
9:52:42sisters to be separated."
9:52:44Where are you? Where are you? Where are
9:52:46you?
9:52:47I didn't see the wall in front of me. My
9:52:49teeth sang as I collided face-first. I
9:52:52padded blindly, feeling for a break, a
9:52:55corner. The wall continued on.
9:52:58Dead end. If it was a dead end, "Nowhere
9:53:01to go down here, lady." One of them
9:53:04said. I kept moving, gritting my teeth,
9:53:07gauging the power still frozen inside
9:53:09me. Not even an ember to summon to light
9:53:11the way, to show where I was, to show
9:53:14any holes ahead.
9:53:16The terror of it had my bones locking
9:53:18up. No. No. Keep moving. Keep going. I
9:53:22reached out, desperate for a bookshelf
9:53:24to grab. Surely they wouldn't put a
9:53:25shelf near a gaping hole in the earth.
9:53:28Empty blackness met my fingers, slipped
9:53:31between them again and again. I stumbled
9:53:34a step. Leather met my fingers, solid
9:53:37leather. I fumbled, the hard spines of
9:53:40books meeting my palms, and bit down my
9:53:42sob of relief, a lifeline in a violent
9:53:45sea. I felt my way down the stack,
9:53:48running now. It ended too soon. I took
9:53:51another blind step forward, touched my
9:53:53way around a corner of another stack,
9:53:55just as the ravens hissed with
9:53:57displeasure. The sound said enough.
9:54:00They'd lost me for a moment. I inched
9:54:03along, keeping my back to a shelf,
9:54:05calming my heaving lungs until my
9:54:07breaths became near silent. "Please." I
9:54:10breathed into the dark, barely more than
9:54:12a whisper. Please, help me.
9:54:15In the distance, a boom shuddered
9:54:17through the ancient floor.
9:54:19"High Lady of the Night Court," one of
9:54:21the ravens sang.
9:54:23"What sort of cage shall our king build
9:54:26for you?" Fear would get me killed. Fear
9:54:29would A soft voice whispered in my ear.
9:54:32"You are the High Lady." The voice was
9:54:35both young and old, hideous and
9:54:38beautiful. Y- Yes, I whispered. I could
9:54:41sense no body heat, detect no physical
9:54:44presence, but I felt it behind me. Even
9:54:48with my back to the shelf, I felt the
9:54:50mass of it lurking behind me, around me,
9:54:53like a shroud. "We can smell you," the
9:54:56other raven said. "How your mate shall
9:54:58rage when he's found we've taken you."
9:55:01Please, I breathed to the thing crouched
9:55:04behind me, over me.
9:55:06"What shall you give me?"
9:55:09Such a dangerous question. Never make a
9:55:11bargain, Alice had once warned me before
9:55:13under the mountain. Even if the bargains
9:55:15I'd made, they'd saved us and brought me
9:55:18to Rhys.
9:55:20"What do you want?" one of the ravens
9:55:22snapped. "Who is she talking to?"
9:55:25"The stone and wind here all speak all.
9:55:30They whispered to me of your desire to
9:55:32wield the Carver, to trade."
9:55:36My breath came hard and fast. "What of
9:55:38it?"
9:55:39"I knew him once, long ago, before so
9:55:43many things crawled the earth." The
9:55:47ravens were close, far too close, when
9:55:49one of them hissed, "What is she
9:55:50mumbling? Does she know a spell as the
9:55:53master did?" I whispered to the lurking
9:55:56dark behind me, "What is your price?"
9:55:59The raven's footsteps sounded so nearby,
9:56:01they couldn't have been more than 20 ft
9:56:03away. "Who are you talking to?" one of
9:56:06them demanded.
9:56:08Company.
9:56:09Send me company.
9:56:12I opened my mouth, but then said, "To
9:56:15eat?" A laugh that made my skin crawl.
9:56:18To tell me of life. The air ahead
9:56:22shifted as the Hybern ravens closed in.
9:56:25"There you are." one seethed. "It's a
9:56:28bargain." I breathed. The skin along my
9:56:31left forearm tingled. The thing behind
9:56:33me, I could have sworn I felt it smile.
9:56:36"Shall I kill them?"
9:56:39"Please do."
9:56:40Light spotted before me, and I blinked
9:56:43at the blinding ball of faelight. I saw
9:56:45the twin ravens first, that faelight at
9:56:47their shoulder to illuminate me for
9:56:49their taking. Their attention went to
9:56:51me, then rose over my shoulder, my head.
9:56:55Absolute, unfiltered terror filled their
9:56:58faces at what stood behind me.
9:57:01"Close your eyes." the thing purred in
9:57:03my ear. I obeyed, trembling. Then all I
9:57:07heard was screaming, high-pitched
9:57:09shrieking and pleading, bones snapping,
9:57:12blood splattering like rain, cloth
9:57:14ripping, and screaming, screaming,
9:57:17screaming.
9:57:18I squeezed my eyes shut so hard it hurt,
9:57:21squeezed them shut so hard I was
9:57:22shaking. Then there were warm, rough
9:57:25hands on me, dragging me away, and
9:57:28Cassian's voice at my ear saying, "Don't
9:57:30look. Don't look."
9:57:32I didn't. I let him lead me away just as
9:57:35I felt Rhys arrive, felt him land on the
9:57:38floor of the pit so hard the entire
9:57:40mountain shuddered.
9:57:42I opened my eyes then, found him
9:57:44storming toward us, night rippling off
9:57:46him, such fury on his face. "Get them
9:57:49out." The order was given to Cassian.
9:57:52The screaming was still erupting behind
9:57:54us. I lurched toward Rhys, but he was
9:57:56already gone, a plume of darkness
9:57:58spreading from him to shield the view of
9:58:01what he walked into, knowing I would
9:58:03look.
9:58:04The screaming stopped.
9:58:07In the terrible silence, Cassian hauled
9:58:09me out toward the dim center of the pit.
9:58:12Nesta was standing there, arms around
9:58:14herself, eyes wide.
9:58:16Cassian only stretched out an arm for
9:58:18her. As if in a trance, she walked right
9:58:21to his side. His arms tightened around
9:58:24both of us, siphons flaring, gilding the
9:58:26darkness with blood-red light. Then we
9:58:29launched skyward just as the screaming
9:58:32began anew.
9:58:37Chapter 32
9:58:40Cassian gave us both a glass of brandy,
9:58:42a tall glass.
9:58:44Seated in an armchair in the family
9:58:46library high above, Nesta drank hers in
9:58:49one gulp.
9:58:50I claimed the chair across from her,
9:58:52took a sip, shuddered at the taste, and
9:58:54made to set it down on the low-lying
9:58:56table between us.
9:58:58"Keep drinking," Cassian ordered. The
9:59:01wrath wasn't toward me. No, it was
9:59:04toward whatever was below, what had
9:59:06happened.
9:59:07"Are you hurt?" Cassian asked me. Each
9:59:10word clipped, brutal. I shook my head.
9:59:13That he didn't ask Nesta,
9:59:15he must have found her first,
9:59:17ascertained for himself.
9:59:19I started, "Is the king the city?" "No
9:59:23sign of him." A muscle twitched in his
9:59:25jaw.
9:59:27We sat in silence until Rhys appeared
9:59:29between the open doors, shadows trailing
9:59:31in his wake. Blood coated his hands, but
9:59:35nothing else. So much blood, ruby bright
9:59:38in the mid-morning sun, like he'd clawed
9:59:40through them with his bare hands.
9:59:42His eyes were wholly frozen with rage,
9:59:45but they dipped to my left arm, the
9:59:47sleeve filthy but still rolled up like a
9:59:50slim band of black iron around my
9:59:52forearm, a tattoo now lay there. "It's
9:59:55custom in my court for bargains to be
9:59:57permanently marked upon flesh." Rhys had
10:00:00told me under the mountain. "What did
10:00:02you give it?" I hadn't heard that voice
10:00:04since that visit to the Court of
10:00:06Nightmares. "It
10:00:08It said it wanted company, someone to
10:00:10tell me about life."
10:00:12I said yes.
10:00:13"Did you volunteer yourself?" "No."
10:00:16I drained the rest of the brandy at the
10:00:18tone of his frozen face. "It just said
10:00:21someone and it didn't specify when." I
10:00:24grimaced at the solid black band, no
10:00:26thicker than the width of my finger,
10:00:28interrupted only by two slender gaps
10:00:30near the side of my forearm. I tried to
10:00:33stand, to go to him, to take those
10:00:35bloody hands, but my knees still wobbled
10:00:38enough that I couldn't move.
10:00:40"Are the King's Ravens dead?" "They
10:00:43nearly were when I arrived. It left
10:00:45enough of their minds functioning for me
10:00:47to have a look and finish them when I
10:00:50was done."
10:00:52Cassian was stone-faced, glancing
10:00:54between Rhys's bloody hands and his
10:00:56ice-cold eyes.
10:00:57But it was to my sister that my mate
10:00:59turned.
10:01:01"Hybern hunts you because of what you
10:01:02took from the Cauldron. The Queens want
10:01:05you dead for vengeance, for robbing them
10:01:07of immortality." "I know." Nesta's voice
10:01:10was hoarse. "What did you take?"
10:01:14"I don't know."
10:01:15The words were barely more than a
10:01:16whisper.
10:01:18"Even Amren can't figure it out."
10:01:20Rhys stared her down, but Nesta looked
10:01:23to me and I could have sworn fear shown
10:01:25there and guilt and some other feeling.
10:01:28"You told me to run." "You're my
10:01:31sister." was all I said. She'd once
10:01:34tried to cross the wall to save me, but
10:01:36she started. "Elaine?"
10:01:39"Elaine is fine." Rhys said. "Azriel was
10:01:42at the townhouse. Lucien is headed back
10:01:44and Mor is nearly there. They know of
10:01:47the threat."
10:01:48Nesta leaned her head back against the
10:01:50armchair's cushion, going a bit
10:01:52boneless.
10:01:53I said to Rhys,
10:01:54"Hybern infiltrated our city again." The
10:01:58prick held onto that fleeting spell
10:02:00until he really needed it.
10:02:02"Fleeting spell?" "A spell of mighty
10:02:04power, able to be wielded only once to
10:02:07great effect. One capable of cleaving
10:02:10wards. He must have been biding his
10:02:12time."
10:02:13"Are the wards here?" "Amren is
10:02:15currently adapting them against such
10:02:17things and will then begin combing
10:02:19through the city to find if the king
10:02:21also deposited any other cronies before
10:02:23he vanished."
10:02:25Beneath the cold rage, there was a
10:02:27sharpness honed enough that I said,
10:02:30"What's wrong?" "What's wrong?" he
10:02:32replied verbally as if he could no
10:02:34longer distinguish between the two.
10:02:37"What's wrong is that those pieces of
10:02:38[ __ ] got into my house and attacked my
10:02:41mate. What's wrong is that my own damn
10:02:43wards worked against me and you had to
10:02:46make a bargain with that thing to keep
10:02:48yourself from being taken. What's
10:02:51wrong?" "Calm down." I said quietly but
10:02:54not weakly.
10:02:55His eyes glowed like lightning had
10:02:57struck an ocean,
10:02:59but he inhaled deeply, blowing out the
10:03:01breath through his nose, and his
10:03:03shoulders loosened barely.
10:03:05"Did you see what it was? That thing
10:03:08down there?"
10:03:09"I guessed enough about it to close my
10:03:11eyes." He said, "I only opened them when
10:03:14it had stepped away from their bodies."
10:03:17Cassian's skin had turned ashen.
10:03:19He'd seen it. He'd seen it again, but he
10:03:22said nothing.
10:03:24"Yes, the king got past our defenses." I
10:03:27said to Rhys, "Yes, things went badly,
10:03:29but we weren't hurt and the ravens
10:03:31revealed some key pieces of
10:03:33information."
10:03:34Sloppy, I realized. Rhys had been sloppy
10:03:37in killing them. Normally, he would have
10:03:39kept them alive for Azriel to question,
10:03:42but he'd taken what he needed quickly
10:03:44and brutally and ended it. He'd shown
10:03:47more restraint about the Ador.
10:03:49"We know why the cauldron doesn't work
10:03:51at its full strength now," I went on.
10:03:53"We know that Nesta is more of a
10:03:55priority for the king than I am."
10:03:58Rhys mulled it over.
10:03:59"Hybern showed part of his hand in
10:04:01bringing them here. He has to have a
10:04:03sliver of doubt of his conquest if he'd
10:04:06risk it."
10:04:07Nesta looked like she was going to be
10:04:09sick. Cassian wordlessly refilled her
10:04:11glass. But I asked, "How?
10:04:15How did you know that we were in
10:04:16trouble?"
10:04:17"Clotho," Rhys said. "There's a spelled
10:04:20bell inside the library. She rang it and
10:04:23it went out to all of us. Cassian got
10:04:25there first."
10:04:27I wondered what had happened in those
10:04:28initial moments when he'd found my
10:04:30sister.
10:04:31As if he'd read my thoughts, Rhys sent
10:04:34the image to me, no doubt courtesy of
10:04:36Cassian.
10:04:38Panic and rage. That was all he knew as
10:04:41he shot down into the heart of the pit,
10:04:43spearing for that ancient darkness that
10:04:45had once shaken him to his very marrow.
10:04:48Nesta was there and Feyre.
10:04:51It was the former he saw first,
10:04:52stumbling out of the dark, wide-eyed.
10:04:55Her fear a tang that whetted his rage
10:04:57into something so sharp he could barely
10:04:59think, barely breathe.
10:05:01She let out a small animal sound, like
10:05:04some wounded stag, as she saw him, as he
10:05:07landed so hard his knees popped.
10:05:10He said nothing as Nesta launched
10:05:12herself toward him, her dress filthy and
10:05:14disheveled, her arms stretching for him.
10:05:17He opened his own for her, unable to
10:05:19stop his approach, his reaching. She
10:05:22gripped his leathers instead. "Feyre,"
10:05:25she rasped, pointing behind her with a
10:05:27free hand, shaking him solidly with the
10:05:29other. Strength. Such untapped strength
10:05:33in that slim, beautiful body.
10:05:35"Hybern."
10:05:36That was all he needed to hear. He drew
10:05:38his sword, then Rhys was arrowing for
10:05:41them, his power like a god's damned
10:05:43volcanic eruption. Cassian charged ahead
10:05:46into the gloom, following the screaming.
10:05:49I pulled away, not wanting to see any
10:05:51further, see what Cassian had witnessed
10:05:54down there.
10:05:55Rhys strode to me and lifted a hand to
10:05:58brush my hair, but stopped upon seeing
10:06:00the blood crusting his fingers.
10:06:02He instead studied the tattoo now
10:06:04marring my left arm.
10:06:07As long as we don't have to invite it to
10:06:08solstice dinner,
10:06:10I can live with it. You can live with
10:06:12it? I lifted my brows.
10:06:15A ghost of a smile, even with all that
10:06:17had happened, that now lay before us.
10:06:20At least now if one of you misbehaves, I
10:06:22know the perfect punishment. Going down
10:06:25there to talk to that thing for an hour.
10:06:28Nesta scowled with distaste, but Cassian
10:06:30let out a dark laugh.
10:06:32I'll take scrubbing toilets, thank you.
10:06:35Your second encounter seemed less
10:06:36harrowing than the first. It wasn't
10:06:39trying to eat me this time,
10:06:41but shadows still darkened his eyes.
10:06:43Rhys saw them too, saw them and said
10:06:46quietly, again with that high lord's
10:06:48voice,
10:06:49warn whoever needs to know to stay
10:06:51indoors tonight. Children off the
10:06:54streets at sundown. None of the palaces
10:06:56will remain open past moonrise. Anyone
10:06:59on the streets faces the consequences.
10:07:02Of what? I asked, the liquor in my
10:07:05stomach now burning.
10:07:07Rhys's jaw tightened and he surveyed the
10:07:09sparkling city beyond the windows.
10:07:12Of Amren on the hunt.
10:07:17Elaine was nestled beside a too casual
10:07:19Moore on the sitting room couch when we
10:07:21arrived at the townhouse. Nesta strode
10:07:23past me, right to Elaine and took up a
10:07:26seat on her other side before turning
10:07:28her attention to where we remained in
10:07:30the foyer,
10:07:31waiting, somehow sensing the meeting
10:07:33that was about to unfold.
10:07:35Lucien, stationed by the front window,
10:07:38turned from watching the street,
10:07:40monitoring it. A sword and dagger hung
10:07:42from his belt. No humor, no warmth
10:07:45graced his face, only fierce, grim
10:07:48determination.
10:07:50"Azriel's coming down from the roof,"
10:07:52Rhys said to none of us in particular,
10:07:54leaning against the archway into the
10:07:55sitting room and crossing his arms.
10:07:58And as if he'd summoned him, Azriel
10:08:00stepped out of a pocket of shadow by the
10:08:02stairs and scanned us from head to toe.
10:08:06His eyes lingered on the blood crusting
10:08:08Rhys's hands.
10:08:09I took up a spot at the opposite doorway
10:08:11post, while Cassian and Azriel remained
10:08:14between us.
10:08:15Rhys was quiet for a moment before he
10:08:17said,
10:08:19"The priestesses will keep silent about
10:08:21what happened today, and the people of
10:08:23this city won't learn why Amren is now
10:08:25preparing to hunt. We can't afford to
10:08:28let the other High Lords know. It would
10:08:30unnerve them and destabilize the image
10:08:33we have worked so hard to create."
10:08:35"The attack on Velaris," Mor countered
10:08:38from her place on the couch, "already
10:08:40showed we're vulnerable."
10:08:42"That was a surprise attack, which we
10:08:44handled quickly," Cassian said, siphons
10:08:47flickering. "As made sure the
10:08:49information came out portraying us as
10:08:51victors, able to defeat any challenge
10:08:53Hybern throws our way."
10:08:56"We did that today," I said. "It's
10:08:58different," Rhys said. "The first time,
10:09:01we had the element of their surprise to
10:09:03excuse us. This second time,
10:09:06it makes us look unprepared, vulnerable.
10:09:09We can't risk that getting out before
10:09:11the meeting in 10 days. So, for all
10:09:14appearances, we will remain unruffled as
10:09:17we prepare for war."
10:09:19Mor sagged against the couch cushions.
10:09:21"A war where we have no allies beyond
10:09:23Keir, either in Prythian or beyond it."
10:09:27Rhys gave her a sharp look, but Elain
10:09:29said quietly,
10:09:31"The Queen might come."
10:09:33Silence.
10:09:35Elaine was staring at the unlit
10:09:36fireplace, eyes lost to that vague
10:09:39murkiness.
10:09:40"What queen?" Nesta said, more tightly
10:09:43than she usually spoke to our sister.
10:09:46"The one who was cursed."
10:09:48"Cursed by the Cauldron." I clarified to
10:09:50Nesta, pushing off the archway, "when it
10:09:53threw its tantrum after you left." "No."
10:09:58Elaine studied me, then her.
10:10:00"Not that one.
10:10:02The other."
10:10:03Nesta took a steadying breath, opening
10:10:06her mouth to either whisk Elaine
10:10:07upstairs or move on.
10:10:09But Azriel asked softly, taking a single
10:10:12step over the threshold and into the
10:10:14sitting room,
10:10:15"What other?"
10:10:17Elaine's brows twitched toward each
10:10:19other.
10:10:19"The queen with the feathers of flame."
10:10:23The Shadow Singer angled his head.
10:10:25Lucien murmured to me, eyes still fixed
10:10:27on Elaine. "Should we Does she need
10:10:32"She doesn't need anything." Azriel
10:10:34answered, without so much as looking at
10:10:35Lucien.
10:10:37Elaine was staring at the Spymaster now,
10:10:39unblinkingly.
10:10:41"We're the ones who need." Azriel
10:10:44trailed off.
10:10:45"A seer." He said, more to himself than
10:10:48us.
10:10:49"The Cauldron made you a seer."
10:10:55Chapter 33
10:10:58Seer. The word clang through me.
10:11:01She'd known. She'd warned Nesta about
10:11:03the ravens, and in the chaos of the
10:11:05attack, that little realization had
10:11:07slipped from me. Slipped from me as
10:11:09reality and dreams slipped and entwined
10:11:12for Elaine. Seer.
10:11:15Elaine turned to Mor, who was now gaping
10:11:17at my sister from her spot beside her on
10:11:19the couch.
10:11:20"Is that what this is?"
10:11:22And the words, the tone,
10:11:25they were so normal sounding that my
10:11:27chest tightened.
10:11:28Mor's gaze darted across my sister's
10:11:30face as if weighing the words, the
10:11:33question, the truth or lie within.
10:11:36Mor at last blinked, mouth parting like
10:11:39that magic of hers had at last solved
10:11:41some puzzle.
10:11:43Slowly, clearly, she nodded. Lucien
10:11:47silently slid into one of the chairs
10:11:49before the window, that metal eye
10:11:51whirring as it roved over my sister.
10:11:54It made sense, I supposed, that Azriel
10:11:57alone had listened to her. The male who
10:11:59heard things others could not.
10:12:02Perhaps he too had suffered as Elain had
10:12:05before he understood what gift he
10:12:06possessed. He asked Elain,
10:12:09"There is another queen?" Elain squinted
10:12:13as if the question required some inner
10:12:14clarification, some path into looking
10:12:18the right way at whatever had addled and
10:12:19plagued her.
10:12:21"Yes."
10:12:22"The sixth queen." Mor breathed. "The
10:12:25queen who the golden one said wasn't
10:12:26ill."
10:12:28"She said not to trust the other queens
10:12:30because of it." I added. And as soon as
10:12:33the words left my mouth, it was like
10:12:35stepping back from a painting to see the
10:12:37entire picture. Up close, the words had
10:12:40been muddled and messy, but from a
10:12:42distance,
10:12:43"You stole from the Cauldron." I said to
10:12:46Nesta, who seemed ready to jump between
10:12:48all of us and Elain. "But what if the
10:12:50Cauldron gave something to Elain?"
10:12:53Nesta's face drained of color. "What?"
10:12:56Equally ashen, Lucien seemed inclined to
10:12:59echo Nesta's hoarse question. But Azriel
10:13:01nodded. "You knew." He said to Elain,
10:13:05"about the young queen turning into a
10:13:07crone."
10:13:08Elain blinked and blinked, eyes clearing
10:13:11again as if the understanding, our
10:13:14understanding, it freed her from
10:13:16whatever murky realm she'd been in.
10:13:19"The sixth queen is alive?" Azriel
10:13:22asked, calm and steady, the voice of the
10:13:24High Lord's spymaster, who had broken
10:13:27enemies and charmed allies.
10:13:29Elaine cocked her head as if listening
10:13:31to some inner voice.
10:13:33Yes.
10:13:35Lucien just stared and stared at my
10:13:37sister as if he'd never seen her before.
10:13:40I whipped my face to Rhys. A potential
10:13:42ally?
10:13:44I don't know, he answered, if the others
10:13:46cursed her.
10:13:48What sort of curse? My mate asked before
10:13:50he'd even finished speaking to me.
10:13:53Elaine shifted her face toward him,
10:13:55another blank.
10:13:57They sold her to
10:13:59to some darkness, to some
10:14:02sorcerer lord. She shook her head. I can
10:14:06never see him what he is.
10:14:09There is an onyx box that he possesses,
10:14:11more vital than anything, save for them,
10:14:14the girls. He keeps other girls, others
10:14:17so like her, but she
10:14:20By day she is one form, by night human
10:14:24again.
10:14:25A bird of burning feathers, I said.
10:14:28Firebird by day, Rhys mused, woman by
10:14:32night.
10:14:33So she's held captive by this sorcerer
10:14:35lord? Elaine shook her head. I don't
10:14:38know. I hear her
10:14:41her screaming with rage, utter rage. She
10:14:45shuddered. Mor leaned forward.
10:14:48Do you know why the other queens cursed
10:14:50her, sold her to him? Elaine studied the
10:14:52table.
10:14:53No.
10:14:55No, that is all mist and shadow. Rhys
10:14:58blew out a breath. Can you sense where
10:15:00she is?
10:15:02There is
10:15:03a lake, deep in
10:15:06in the continent, I think, hidden
10:15:08amongst mountains and ancient forests.
10:15:11Elaine's throat bobbed. He keeps them
10:15:14all at the lake.
10:15:15Other women like her?
10:15:17>> Yes and no.
10:15:20Their feathers are as white as snow.
10:15:23They glide across the water while she
10:15:25rages through the skies above it.
10:15:28>> Mor said to Rhys.
10:15:29What information do we have on this
10:15:31sixth queen?
10:15:32>> Little.
10:15:33>> Azriel answered for him. We know little.
10:15:36Young, somewhere in her mid-twenties.
10:15:39Scythia lies along the wall to the east.
10:15:42It's smallest amongst the human queen's
10:15:44realms, but rich in trade and arms.
10:15:47She goes by Vassa, but I never got a
10:15:49report with her full name.
10:15:51>> Rhys considered.
10:15:53She must have posed a considerable
10:15:55threat to the queens if they turned on
10:15:57her. And considering their agenda
10:16:00>> If we can find Vassa, I cut in, she
10:16:03could be vital in convincing the human
10:16:05forces to fight and giving us an ally on
10:16:07the continent.
10:16:09>> If we can find her, Cassian countered,
10:16:12stepping up to Azriel's side, his wings
10:16:15flaring slightly. It could take months,
10:16:18not to mention facing the male who holds
10:16:20her captive could be harder than
10:16:21expected. We can't afford all those
10:16:23potential risks or the time it would
10:16:25take. We should focus on this meeting
10:16:28with the other high lords first.
10:16:30>> But we could stand to gain much, Mor
10:16:33said. Perhaps she has an army
10:16:35>> Perhaps she does, Cassian cut her off,
10:16:38but if she's cursed, who will lead it?
10:16:40And if her kingdom is so far away, they
10:16:43have to travel the mortal way too. You
10:16:45remember how slowly they moved, how
10:16:47quickly they died.
10:16:49>> It's worth a try.
10:16:50>> Mor sniped.
10:16:51>> You're needed here.
10:16:52>> Cassian said.
10:16:54>> Azriel looked inclined to agree even as
10:16:56he kept quiet.
10:16:58>> I need you on a battlefield, not
10:17:00traipsing through the continent. The
10:17:02human half of it. If those queens have
10:17:04rallied armies to offer Hybern, they're
10:17:06no doubt standing between you and Queen
10:17:08Vassa.
10:17:10>> You don't give me orders. No, but I do,
10:17:14Rhys said. Don't give me that look. He's
10:17:17right. We need you here more. Sithia,
10:17:21Mor said, shaking her head. I remember
10:17:23them. They're horse people. A mounted
10:17:25cavalry could travel far faster than No.
10:17:29Sheer will blazed in Rhys's eyes. The
10:17:32order was final. But Mor tried again.
10:17:35There is a reason why Elain is seeing
10:17:37these things. She was right about the
10:17:39other queen turning old, about the
10:17:41Raven's attack. Why is she being sent
10:17:43this message? Why is she hearing this
10:17:45queen? It must be vital. If we ignore
10:17:49it, perhaps we'll deserve to fail.
10:17:52Silence.
10:17:53I surveyed them all. Vital. Each of them
10:17:56was vital here, but me.
10:17:59I sucked in a breath.
10:18:01I'll go.
10:18:02Lucien was staring at Elain as he spoke.
10:18:05We all looked at him.
10:18:06Lucien shifted his focus to Rhys, to me.
10:18:09I'll go, he repeated, rising to his
10:18:12feet, to find this sixth queen.
10:18:15Mor opened and shut her mouth.
10:18:18What makes you think you could find her?
10:18:20Rhys asked, not rudely, but from a
10:18:22commander's perspective, sizing up the
10:18:25skills Lucien offered against the risks,
10:18:27the potential benefits.
10:18:29This eye, Lucien gestured to the metal
10:18:32contraption,
10:18:33it can see things that others can't.
10:18:36Spells, glamours. Perhaps it can help me
10:18:39find her and break her curse.
10:18:42He glanced at Elain, who was again
10:18:44studying her lap.
10:18:46I'm not needed here. I'll fight if you
10:18:48need me to, but
10:18:50He offered me a grim smile.
10:18:52I do not belong in the Autumn Court, and
10:18:55I'm willing to bet I'm no longer welcome
10:18:57at hit
10:18:58the Spring Court.
10:19:00Home, he had almost said.
10:19:03But I cannot sit here and do nothing.
10:19:05Those queens with their armies, there is
10:19:08a threat in that regard, too.
10:19:10So, use me. Send me.
10:19:12I will find Vassa. See if she can bring
10:19:16help.
10:19:17"You will be going into the human
10:19:19territory," Rhys warned. "I can't spare
10:19:22a force to guard you." "I don't need
10:19:24one. I travel faster on my own."
10:19:27His chin lifted. "I will find her. And
10:19:30if there's an army to bring back, or at
10:19:32least some way for her own story to sway
10:19:34the human forces,
10:19:35I'll find a way to do that, too."
10:19:38My friends glanced to each other. Mor
10:19:40said,
10:19:42"It will be
10:19:43very dangerous."
10:19:45A half smile curved Lucien's mouth.
10:19:48"Good. It'd be boring otherwise."
10:19:51Only Cassian returned the grin.
10:19:54"I'll load you up with some Illyrian
10:19:55steel."
10:19:56Elain now watched Lucien warily,
10:19:59blinking every now and then.
10:20:01She revealed no hint of whatever she
10:20:02might be seeing, sensing. None.
10:20:06Rhys pushed off the archway.
10:20:08"I'll winnow you as close as we can get
10:20:10to wherever you need to begin your
10:20:12hunt."
10:20:13Lucien had indeed been studying all
10:20:15those maps lately, perhaps at the quiet
10:20:18behest of whatever force had guided us
10:20:20all.
10:20:21My mate added, "Thank you."
10:20:23Lucien shrugged. And it was that gesture
10:20:26alone that made me say at last,
10:20:28"Are you sure?"
10:20:30He only glanced at Elain, whose face was
10:20:33again a calm void, while she traced a
10:20:35finger over the embroidery on the couch
10:20:37cushions.
10:20:38"Yes.
10:20:39Let me help in whatever way I can."
10:20:43Even Nesta seemed relatively concerned.
10:20:45Not for him, no doubt, but the fact that
10:20:48if he were hurt or killed, what would it
10:20:50do to Elain?
10:20:52The severing of the mating bond.
10:20:54I shut out the thought of what it had do
10:20:56to me.
10:20:57I asked Lucien,
10:20:59"When do you want to leave?"
10:21:01"Tomorrow." I hadn't heard him sound so
10:21:04assertive in a long time.
10:21:07I'll prepare for the rest of today and
10:21:09leave after breakfast tomorrow morning.
10:21:11He added to Rhys, "If that works for
10:21:14you."
10:21:15My mate waved an idle hand.
10:21:17"For what you're about to do, Lucien,
10:21:20we'll make it work."
10:21:22Silence fell once more.
10:21:24If he could find that missing queen and
10:21:26perhaps bring back some sort of human
10:21:28army, or at least sway the mortal forces
10:21:31from Hybern's thrall, if I could find a
10:21:33way to get the Carver to fight for us
10:21:35that did not involve using that terrible
10:21:37mirror,
10:21:38would it be enough?
10:21:40The meeting with the High Lords, it
10:21:42seemed, would decide that.
10:21:44Rhys jerked his chin at Azriel, who took
10:21:46it as an order to vanish, to no doubt
10:21:48check in on Amren.
10:21:50"Find out if Keir and his Darkbringers
10:21:52had any attacks." My mate ordered more
10:21:55and Cassian, who nodded and left as
10:21:57well.
10:21:58Alone with my sisters and Lucien, Rhys
10:22:00and I caught Nesta's eye. And for once,
10:22:04my sister rose to her feet and came
10:22:06toward us, the three of us not so subtly
10:22:08heading upstairs, leaving Lucien and
10:22:11Elain alone.
10:22:13It was an effort not to linger atop the
10:22:15landing to listen to what was said, if
10:22:17anything was said at all.
10:22:20But I made myself take Rhys's hand,
10:22:22flinching at the blood still caked on
10:22:24his skin, and led him to our bathing
10:22:26room. Nesta's bedroom door clicked shut
10:22:28down the hall.
10:22:31Rhys wordlessly watched me as I turned
10:22:33on the bathtub faucet and grabbed a
10:22:35washcloth from the chest against the
10:22:36wall.
10:22:38I took up a seat at the edge of the tub,
10:22:40testing the water temperature against my
10:22:41wrist, and patted the porcelain rim
10:22:44beside me.
10:22:45"Sit."
10:22:46He obeyed, his head drooping as he sat.
10:22:50I took one of his hands, guided it to
10:22:52the gurgling stream of water, and held
10:22:54it beneath.
10:22:56Red flowed off his skin, eddying in the
10:22:58water beneath.
10:23:00I plucked up the cloth and scrubbed
10:23:02gently, more blood flaking off, water
10:23:04splashing onto the still immaculate
10:23:06sleeves of his jacket.
10:23:09"Why not shield your hands?"
10:23:11"I wanted to feel it, their lives ending
10:23:14beneath my fingers."
10:23:16Cold, flat words.
10:23:18I scrubbed at his nails, the blood
10:23:20wedged into the cracks where it met his
10:23:22skin.
10:23:23The arcs beneath.
10:23:25"Why is it different this time?
10:23:27Different from the Ador's ambush,
10:23:29Hybern's attack in the woods, the attack
10:23:31on Valaris, all of it. I'd seen him in a
10:23:34rage before, but never
10:23:37never so detached, as if morality and
10:23:39kindness were things that lurked on a
10:23:41surface far, far above the frozen depths
10:23:44he'd plunged into."
10:23:46I turned his palm into the spray,
10:23:48getting at the space between his
10:23:49fingers.
10:23:51"What is the point of it?" he said, "Of
10:23:53all this power, if I can't protect those
10:23:56who are most vulnerable in my city, if I
10:23:59can't detect an incoming attack.
10:24:01Even Azriel didn't learn of it. The king
10:24:04used an archaic spell and walked in the
10:24:06front door. If I can't"
10:24:10Rhys shook his head. I lowered his now
10:24:12clean hand and reached for the other.
10:24:14More blood stained the water.
10:24:17"If I can't protect them here,
10:24:19how can"
10:24:20His throat bobbed. I lifted his chin
10:24:23with a hand. I see rage had something a
10:24:26bit shattered and aching.
10:24:29"Those priestesses have endured enough.
10:24:31I failed them today.
10:24:33That library,
10:24:35it will no longer feel safe for them.
10:24:37The one place they've had to themselves,
10:24:39where they knew they were protected.
10:24:41Hybern took that away today."
10:24:44And from him,
10:24:46he had gone to that library for his own
10:24:47need for healing, for safety.
10:24:50He said,
10:24:52"Perhaps it's punishment for taking away
10:24:54Valaris from Moore and granting Keir
10:24:56access here.
10:24:58You can't think like that.
10:25:00It won't end well.
10:25:02I finished washing his other hand,
10:25:04rinsed the cloth, then began swiping it
10:25:06along his neck, his temples, soothing
10:25:09warm presses, not to clean, but to
10:25:12relax.
10:25:13I'm not angry about the bargain, he
10:25:16said, closing his eyes as I wiped the
10:25:18cloth over his brow.
10:25:20In case you were worried. I wasn't. Rhys
10:25:24opened his eyes as if he could hear the
10:25:26smile in my voice and studied me while I
10:25:28chucked the cloth into the tub with a
10:25:30wet slap and turned off the faucet.
10:25:33He was still studying me when I took his
10:25:35face in my damp hands.
10:25:37What happened today was not your fault,
10:25:40I said, the words filling the
10:25:42sun-drenched bathing room. None of it.
10:25:45It all lies on Hybern, and when we face
10:25:48the king again, we will remember these
10:25:50attacks, these injuries to our people.
10:25:53We forgot Amarantha's spellbook to our
10:25:55own loss, but we have a book of our own,
10:25:58hopefully with the spell we need. And
10:26:00for now,
10:26:02for now we will prepare and we will face
10:26:04the consequences. For now, we move
10:26:07ahead.
10:26:09He turned his kiss to my palm.
10:26:11Remind me to give you a salary raise. I
10:26:14choked on a cough. For what? For the
10:26:17Sage Council and the other vital
10:26:20services you provide me.
10:26:22He winked. I laughed in earnest and
10:26:25squeezed his face as I pressed a swift
10:26:27kiss to his mouth. Shameless flirt.
10:26:30The warmth returned to his eyes at last.
10:26:33So I reached for an ivory towel and
10:26:35bundled his hands, now clean and warm,
10:26:38into the folds of soft fabric.
10:26:44Chapter 34
10:26:48Amren found no other Hybern assassins or
10:26:50spies during her long night of hunting
10:26:52through Velaris. How she sought them,
10:26:55how she distinguished friend from foe?
10:26:57Some people, Mor told me the next
10:26:59morning after we all had a sleepless
10:27:01night, painted their thresholds in lambs
10:27:04blood. A sort of offering to her and
10:27:07payment to stay away. Some left cups of
10:27:10it on their doorsteps. As if everyone in
10:27:12the city knew that the High Lord's
10:27:14second, that small boned female, she was
10:27:18the monster that defended them from the
10:27:19other horrors of the world.
10:27:22Rhys had spent much of the previous day
10:27:24and night reassuring the priestesses of
10:27:26their safety, walking them through the
10:27:28new wards. The priestess who had let
10:27:30them in, for whatever reason, Hybern had
10:27:33left her alive.
10:27:35She allowed Rhys into her mind to see
10:27:37what had happened.
10:27:38Once the king had sundered the wards
10:27:40with that fleeting spell, his ravens had
10:27:42appeared as two old scholars to get the
10:27:44priestess to open the door, then forced
10:27:47their way into her mind so that she'd
10:27:49welcome them in without being vetted.
10:27:51The violation of that alone.
10:27:54Rhys had spent hours with those
10:27:55priestesses yesterday, Mor, too.
10:27:59Talking, listening to the ones who could
10:28:01speak, holding the hands of the ones who
10:28:03couldn't.
10:28:04And when they at last left, there was a
10:28:07peace between my mate and his cousin.
10:28:10Some lingering jagged edge that had
10:28:11somehow been soothed.
10:28:14We didn't have long. I knew that, felt
10:28:17it with every breath. Hybern wasn't
10:28:19coming. Hybern was here.
10:28:22Our meeting with the High Lords was now
10:28:23over a week away, and still Nesta
10:28:26refused to join us.
10:28:28But it was fine. We'd manage. I'd
10:28:32manage.
10:28:33We didn't have another choice.
10:28:35Which was why I found myself standing in
10:28:37the foyer the next morning, watching
10:28:39Lucien shoulder his heavy pack.
10:28:42He wore Illyrian leathers under a
10:28:44heavier jacket along with layers of
10:28:46clothes beneath to help him survive in
10:28:48varying climates.
10:28:50He'd braided back his red hair, the
10:28:52length of it snaking across his back
10:28:54right in front of the Illyrian sword
10:28:56strapped down his spine.
10:28:58Cassian had given him free reign
10:28:59yesterday afternoon to loot his personal
10:29:01cache of weapons.
10:29:03Though my friend had been economical
10:29:05about which ones he'd selected. The
10:29:07blade plus a short sword plus an
10:29:09assortment of daggers, a quiver of
10:29:11arrows and an unstrung bow were tied to
10:29:14his pack.
10:29:15"You know precisely where you want Rhys
10:29:17to take you?" I asked at last.
10:29:20Lucien nodded, glancing to where my mate
10:29:23now waited by the front door.
10:29:25He'd bring Lucien to the edge of the
10:29:26human continent to wherever Lucien had
10:29:29decided would be the best landing spot.
10:29:31"No farther." Azriel had insisted. His
10:29:34reports indicated it was too watched,
10:29:37too dangerous even for one of our own.
10:29:40Even for the most powerful High Lord in
10:29:42history.
10:29:44I stepped forward and didn't give Lucien
10:29:46time to step back as I hugged him
10:29:48tightly.
10:29:49"Thank you." I said, trying not to think
10:29:52about all the steel on him, if he'd need
10:29:54to use it.
10:29:56"It was time." Lucien said quietly,
10:29:58giving me a squeeze.
10:30:00For me to do something.
10:30:02I pulled away, surveying his scarred
10:30:04face.
10:30:05"Thank you." I said again.
10:30:08It was all I could think of to say.
10:30:10Rhys extended a hand to Lucien.
10:30:13Lucien studied it, then my mate's face.
10:30:16I could nearly see all the hateful words
10:30:18they'd spoken dangling between them,
10:30:21between that outstretched hand and
10:30:22Lucien's own.
10:30:24But Lucien took Rhys's hand, that silent
10:30:27offer of not only transportation.
10:30:30Before that dark wind swept in, Lucien
10:30:32looked back. Not to me, I realized, to
10:30:36someone behind me.
10:30:38Pale and thin, Elaine stood atop the
10:30:40stairs, their gazes locked and held.
10:30:44But Elaine said nothing, did not so much
10:30:46as take one step downward.
10:30:49Lucien inclined his head in a bow, the
10:30:51movement hiding the gleam in his eye,
10:30:53the longing and sadness.
10:30:56And when Lucien turned to signal to Rhys
10:30:58to go, he did not glance back at Elaine,
10:31:01did not see the half step she took
10:31:03toward the stairs, as if she'd speak to
10:31:05him, stop him. Then Rhys was gone, and
10:31:08Lucien with him.
10:31:10When I turned to offer Elaine breakfast,
10:31:12she'd already walked away.
10:31:17I waited in the foyer for Rhys to
10:31:18return. In the dining room to my left,
10:31:21Nesta silently practiced building those
10:31:23invisible walls in her mind. No sign of
10:31:26Amren since her hunt last night. When I
10:31:29asked if she was making any progress, my
10:31:31sister had only said,
10:31:33"Amren thinks I'm getting close enough
10:31:34to begin trying on something tangible."
10:31:38And that was that. I left her to it, not
10:31:41bothering to ask if Amren had also come
10:31:43close to figuring out some sort of spell
10:31:45in the book to repair that wall.
10:31:48In silence, I counted the minutes one by
10:31:51one.
10:31:53Then a familiar dark wind swirled
10:31:55through the foyer, and I loosed a
10:31:56too-tight breath as Rhys appeared in the
10:31:58middle of the hall carpet. No indication
10:32:01of any sort of trouble, no sign of hurt
10:32:04or harm, but I slid my arm around his
10:32:06waist, needing to feel him, smell him.
10:32:10"Did everything go well?"
10:32:12Rhys brushed a kiss to the top of my
10:32:14head.
10:32:15"As well as can be expected. He's now on
10:32:17the continent, heading eastward."
10:32:20He marked Nesta studying at the dining
10:32:22table.
10:32:23"How's our new Seer holding up?" I
10:32:25pulled back to explain that I'd left
10:32:27Elaine to her own thoughts, but Nesta
10:32:29said, "Don't call her that."
10:32:32Rhys gave me an incredulous look, but
10:32:34Nesta just went back to flipping through
10:32:36a book, her face going vacant while she
10:32:38practiced with whatever wall-building
10:32:40exercises Amren had ordered. I poked him
10:32:43in the ribs. "Don't provoke her."
10:32:46A corner of his mouth lifted, the
10:32:48expression full of wicked delight.
10:32:50"Can I provoke you instead?"
10:32:53I clamped my lips to keep from smiling.
10:32:56The front door blew open and Amren
10:32:58stormed in.
10:32:59Reese was instantly facing her. "What?"
10:33:02Gone was the slick amusement, the
10:33:04relaxed posture.
10:33:06Amren's pale face remained calm, but her
10:33:08eyes, they swirled with rage.
10:33:11"Hybern has attacked the Summer Court.
10:33:14They lay siege to Adriata as we speak."

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