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Regret {Theory - Spoilers All} — Transcript

by Ghil Dirthalen · 12,256 words · 1,710 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

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0:00welcome welcome patrons even before the
0:02game launched Veil guard was said to
0:03carry the theme of regret and sure
0:05enough one of the major plot points that
0:07happens is that soless castles his Rook
0:09to switch places in his prison locked
0:11with regrets however unlike the immortal
0:13Gods before them Rook is able to escape
0:16by confronting and getting over theirs
0:19as someone with the Masters in therapy
0:20you can understand why this idea caught
0:22me on fire and I want to take you all
0:24along On my journey of understanding
0:26what getting over regret even means
0:28along with likely answers as to why a
0:30God could not Escape but the Mortal Rook
0:33could the cage for Gods the cage for
0:36gods or the regret prison as the fandom
0:38has been calling it has been a hot
0:39subject for various reasons mainly being
0:41that there are a lot of questions left
0:44UN anwers in the wake of the mission but
0:45while the game doesn't directly answer a
0:47lot as is usually the case with fade
0:49based missions I do think there is
0:51something to talk about why does it
0:53exist so as stated in the game Solus
0:55built the prison to hold Gillan and
0:56elron in place after he took the Veil
0:58Down it was then locked with regrets
1:01something soless notes in a codex that
1:02they will be slow to open the question I
1:05have is this why making a cage for Gods
1:08makes sense but why not just kill them
1:10why have a cage with a door to begin
1:12with why not lock them away and throw
1:14away the key in one parts to kill them
1:16Souls would have to kill their Arch
1:18demons that itself is quite an ordeal
1:20for him as seen in the last mission of
1:21the game so yeah trapping them is just
1:23going to be easier but and we can't
1:25actually be sure but my theory is this
1:27in Inquisition when you were doing
1:29judgment so is largely gives more
1:30approval for using your prisoner to the
1:32best of their worth rather than locking
1:34them away or killing them Morgan who was
1:36raised by methal similar to Solus as one
1:38might suggest has his whole speech about
1:40preserving knowledge even of dangerous
1:42Solas calls the evanuris his mortal
1:44enemies but now that he has them within
1:46his grasp he doesn't want to waste their
1:48potential by killing them now obviously
1:50when plans go wrong and they are running
1:52a mon he's coaching Rook how and how to
1:54kill them but I think it's also because
1:55their deaths now further his goal of
1:57taking down the veil had he the ability
1:59to use them he would I would argue he
2:02even tries during the blood of arthan
2:03mission when he was chatting with
2:05elron this world is ruined already your
2:09fail destroyed
2:12it you could heal it you have the
2:15strength to repair the damage without
2:17using the
2:20blight but I mentioned that Solus
2:22doesn't like letting his prisoners rot
2:24without purpose Gods trapped in a regret
2:26prison only really serve them at best
2:28what would they have been used for
2:30well as a theory and going back to the
2:32many murals we have I think there are a
2:34few parts to the veil there are the
2:36evanuris prisons that help construct The
2:38Veil The Veil itself the fade that is
2:40held back by the veil and then at the
2:42center of it all the black city which
2:44contains the Titans dreams aka the
2:46blight soless was clear that he did not
2:49want the blight to get out so what if he
2:51was to use the regret prison to hold the
2:53remaining Gods who would then have
2:55helped create the barrier for what holds
2:57the blight back patching together the
2:59mural piece pieces we have to illustrate
3:00my idea here it would look something
3:02like this I do also think there are
3:04questions about how the ritual was going
3:06and the state of the prison because it
3:07was stopped Midway we don't know how
3:10finished the prison is and I would also
3:12assume that Gil and elron would have
3:13needed to be held in separate cells well
3:16it's not confirmed it's absolutely
3:18possible that there is an empty regret
3:19prison just floating around waiting for
3:21a victim alternatively because no one
3:23was actually held in this hypothetical
3:25second prison for the entire game the
3:27magic could have starved without a host
3:28and it collapsed or just never existed I
3:30don't know the trapped uris's use could
3:32also link together with the redeem
3:34ending for Solus where he talks about
3:35trying to calm the blight to the best of
3:37his abilities while the game doesn't
3:39quite make it clear where soless goes
3:40off to at the end of the game posts on
3:42Blue Sky from trick weeks lead writer
3:44for Veil guard says that he went back to
3:46the regret prison his position in the
3:48prison could give him the ability to
3:50calm the blight and perhaps adding
3:51another theory onto this what is soless
3:53had intended the evanuris to repent
3:55their sins of the blight by calming it
3:57themselves before they could have been
3:59freed
4:00at worst they don't do it and the blight
4:02stays locked up and at best they fix the
4:03blight and realize they were wrong
4:05frankly it's a win-win now again I have
4:07no proof for this this is all wild
4:09speculation on my part based on the fact
4:11that sess has historically been one to
4:13use all the tools at his disposal how
4:16does it work going into something a bit
4:17more concrete what is meant by something
4:20being locked by regret I think
4:22functionally in the prison the rift to
4:24leave does not appear until you have
4:26wrestled with your regrets this is also
4:28noted in the Codex centy we found in the
4:30wolf St Rifts in this Veil are spawned
4:33by death and bloodshed or their memory
4:35even mortal regrets have such power the
4:38rift is like caused by dwelling on the
4:39memory of what one regrets and perhaps
4:42only open by regrets that involve death
4:44and bloodshed however in an interesting
4:47twist the prison is also trying to help
4:48you create that Rift the prison has a
4:51sort of logic to it it's reactive to who
4:53is inside and can even talk and mimic
4:56memories there are a ton of questions on
4:58how and what limits has what is the
5:01extent of the intelligence of the prison
5:02could you have an in-depth conversation
5:04with it was veric part of that prison or
5:06was he left over from solas's blood
5:08magic lingering on Rook now one Theory
5:10we can put forth is that there is an
5:12intelligent spirit that is responsible
5:14for the logic of the prison in an early
5:16version of the prison that was found in
5:17the files there was a demon of regret
5:19that was to taunt the player while the
5:21game does not call out that there is a
5:23demon of regret at the core of the
5:24prison there is no reason to say
5:26otherwise and given that things in the
5:28fade are shaped by spirits and memories
5:30it's even expected that there are
5:31ambient Spirits there that quietly pick
5:33away at your memories showing you your
5:35deepest regrets there is also another
5:38element here and why Souls needed to use
5:39rook in the first place the regret
5:42prison seems to attach itself to a
5:44person and drag them in weighing them
5:46down until they are able to let go weeks
5:50also implies this when asked about the
5:51fate of the dagger on Blue Sky which we
5:53will get to the dagger one day this
5:55video is long enough without talking
5:56about the endings in depth Solus will
5:58need to do the mental work to escape the
5:59trap in full and even with the help of
6:01the dagger would be unable to escape we
6:04are not really given the specifics on
6:06how this works but let me give you a
6:07theory I think that whatever magic or
6:09spirit makes at the prison is looking
6:11for pools of regret to Feast on and once
6:14it finds it it drags it into feed this
6:16is already a wellestablished idea within
6:18the lore and various demons so it's
6:19really not out of the realm of
6:21possibilities so then let's quickly
6:23examine the times that people are taken
6:24in at the start of the game Solace is
6:27taken right after killing veric and
6:29seeing the of his enemies freed not hard
6:31to imagine that he's feeling immense
6:33regret here even if it was just for
6:34veric later on when Rook is the one
6:36getting sucked in Solus is using blood
6:38magic to make this situation worse
6:40showing a dead luconis and even very
6:42briefly showing veric stabbed that along
6:45with the events of tearstone Island and
6:47his [ __ ] little monologue is enough
6:48for rook's feelings of regret to
6:50outweigh sesses in that moment allowing
6:52him to free himself in this version the
6:54magical chains are seen as rock statues
6:56that Rook is trying to hold on to a much
6:58more visual representation of what's
6:59going on in my opinion and then at the
7:01end of the game during the sacrifice
7:03violent and trick endings Solace is
7:05bound to the veil and instantly regrets
7:06what is happening that his plan for
7:09again bringing up the wolf stand codex
7:10reparation has officially failed this
7:13summons the chains of the hungry prison
7:15to drag him back this is also why those
7:17same chains don't appear in either
7:19redeem endings when he binds himself to
7:21the veil it's not The Binding of the
7:22veil dragging him back it's his
7:24overwhelming regret and in the redeem
7:27endings he does not regret binding
7:28himself and is able to step in willingly
7:31to seek his atonement but wait some of
7:33you just cried out specifically in the
7:35table discussion for the trick ending
7:36Morgan says that the magic backlash of
7:38using the wrong daggers would hold sess
7:40in plates not his regrets to which my
7:42response is the trick ending is also the
7:44one where sollace is trapped before he
7:46is cut so the magical backlash triggers
7:48the Fate change and his regrets drag him
7:51in the truth is this is a very loose
7:53part of the theory I get if some people
7:54don't gel with that explanation here but
7:56this is just how I see it so then the
7:58next question I found self asking was
8:00this what is regret and how as the game
8:02keeps putting it do you let go and work
8:05through regret unfortunately for all of
8:08you I have a master's in therapy and too
8:10much time on my hands so take a seat and
8:12yes this will be long and extremely
8:14necessary for the remainder of the
8:17video disclaimer I'll be quick but I
8:20need to be self-aware and let you know
8:21where I'm coming from in my analysis
8:23here I've mentioned time and again on
8:25this channel that I have a master's in
8:26therapy however I do not currently have
8:29a therapy license I let it lapse about
8:31four years ago after my daughter was
8:33born to stay home with her plus the cost
8:34of keeping up a license while not
8:36practicing and Co was like a little too
8:38much for me at the time as such to say
8:41I'm Rusty is an understatement but even
8:43if I were practicing there is another
8:45note my Master's is in marriage and
8:47family therapy individual and family
8:49therapy are completely different beast
8:51and why I was trained in had a license
8:53for and practiced individual therapy my
8:55passions did Lay elsewhere also in my
8:58practice I worked in a large poor and
9:00overworked area in Rural America and
9:01mostly with children so I preferred
9:03theories and types of therapeutic
9:04practices that relied on more concrete
9:06actionable steps rather than ones that
9:07recommend a lot of self-introspection so
9:10uh in short kids don't tend to have a
9:11lot of lingering regrets so this isn't
9:13something I dealt with on a day-to-day
9:15basis so a lot of the theory and
9:17practices I present here are mostly
9:19outside of what was my normal wheelhouse
9:21but I'm at least still able to read
9:23academic papers well enough so here we
9:25are and on another note nothing in this
9:27video should be taken as serious
9:28therapeutic advice this is all for fun
9:30if you're actually having some problems
9:31and want to seek help I'm very sorry but
9:33this is not the place to find it
9:35defining regret so as CR as it is to
9:38start off a lecture with defining words
9:39I think regret is vague enough to
9:40Warrant it because outside of the
9:42linguistic definition in a dictionary
9:44psychologists can't seem to completely
9:46agree on a detailed definition of what
9:48regret functionally is when talking
9:50about the general human emotion and how
9:52it relates to other feelings like guilt
9:54shame and remorse I also want to take a
9:57moment to note that a lot of the
9:58literature I sound on regret also lump
10:00into three fields of study the one I'm
10:02focusing on cognitive psychology
10:04business psychology which leans into
10:05things like buyers remorse and Medical
10:07Treatments which tended to compare
10:09Medical Treatments in recipients that
10:11regretted certain procedures mostly with
10:13Cancers from what I could find because
10:15there was just more money in those
10:16latter two those two pools ended up
10:18being a majority of what is available
10:19for free online uh but things I'm also
10:22actively ignoring for this video anyway
10:24a lot of the different research I came
10:25across tended to point to one particular
10:27article as a starting point for research
10:29in regret the 1987 paper by Janet
10:32landman titled regret a theoretical and
10:35conceptual analysis while regret is
10:37similar to feelings of undoing remorse
10:40and guilt it holds a space of its own
10:43regret is a more or less painful
10:45cognitive SL effective state of feeling
10:47sorry for losses transgression
10:48shortcomings or mistakes the regret in
10:51matters may have been sins of commission
10:53as well as SS of omission they may range
10:55from the entirely voluntary to The
10:56Accidental they may have been actually
10:58executed Deeds or entirely mental ones
11:01they may have been committed by oneself
11:03or by another person or group they may
11:05be moral or legal transgressions or
11:07morally and legally neutral and the
11:09regretted matters may have occurred in
11:10the past the present or the future
11:13pretty much every researcher agrees
11:14wholeheartedly with this admittedly very
11:16large definition of regret but what I
11:18think is most noteworthy is her
11:20insistence that regret is not just based
11:22on emotion but reason as well the
11:25exercise of uninhibited emotion quite
11:27obviously makes for faulty decisions and
11:29actions but the exercise of unrelieved
11:32rationality makes for equally faulty
11:33decisions and acts ideally reason and
11:36sentiment are equally Honorable compers
11:38in he attempts to live well Lam goes on
11:40to say that there's a ton of room for
11:42research on what regret is functionally
11:44for and so laid down the question that
11:45many people have tried to answer so I
11:48want to present three different theories
11:49about the functionality and
11:50psychological cause of regret that I
11:52came across that I like for various
11:53reasons but I also want to stress that
11:55there are many more first is an answer
11:58that comes up fairly High on a simple
11:59Google search from Psychology today
12:01written by George S Everly it
12:03frustratingly does not explain what
12:05thought process goes into this
12:06definition however I think it is
12:08important to include the easy to find
12:09answer in our list Everly states that
12:12regret is tied to guilt and shame and
12:14makes up a pattern of behavior that
12:15revolves around action guilt is the
12:17feeling of responsibility for an actual
12:19or perceived offense or wrongdoing
12:22regret is the acceptance of
12:23responsibility of that guilt and also
12:25leads to thoughts of repentance and
12:27atonements a longing to make something
12:29right and shame is humiliation and
12:31distress when one's regrets cannot be
12:33fixed the three are all linked guilt is
12:36cataly Regret is the feeling that Spurs
12:38us into action and shame is the bad end
12:41when the action fails in this Viewpoint
12:43regrets function is self-discipline it
12:45pushes us forward fixing our wrongs and
12:47we are punished with shame if we fail
12:50second is a look at regret from a
12:52cognitive behavioral standpoint by
12:53Robert Ley in his 2022 book if only he
12:56explains regard as the emotion of
12:58possibility regret is the cost of wisdom
13:01we can imagine a world better than the
13:03one we have lived in we can imagine what
13:05life would have been like if we chose
13:06something else regret is the ability to
13:08imagine possibilities it is the
13:10aspirational possibility emotion it
13:13points to what could have been or what
13:14might be not limited by what really
13:17exists in Le's explanation he agrees
13:19with Everly's basic function of regret
13:21but divorces it from guilt and shame
13:23saying that while the ideas are related
13:25they are separate from one another
13:27regret alone helps a self-critic
13:29criticize and self-correct when outcomes
13:30are negative never feeling regret is not
13:33a sign of wisdom or righteousness it may
13:34be a sign that you don't learn from your
13:36mistakes you can make room for regret
13:38rather than needing to eliminate it you
13:40can have a regret about something
13:41without spending a lot of time with the
13:43regret you don't have to be tyrannized
13:45by it to the point of never making a
13:47decision again you don't have to let it
13:49hound you or bury you in guilt and
13:51rumination and you don't have to
13:53eliminate regret from your life to
13:55weaken its power over you he goes on to
13:57elaborate on an idea that he calls
13:59productive regret basically a regret
14:01that stems from something that can
14:02involve an action something that can be
14:04worked on or towards unproductive regret
14:07then is continued focus on something
14:09that one cannot correct cannot do and
14:11cannot reverse in his view regret is a
14:14part of our Evolution as humans its
14:16function is that it helps us plan for
14:18possibilities learn from past mistakes
14:21and reduce impulsive behavior problems
14:23arise when a person spends too much time
14:25thinking about past mistakes rather than
14:27acting to fix or atone for them
14:29third is a research paper by Shai davidi
14:31and Thomas gilovich published in 2018
14:33titled the ideal road not taken the
14:36self-d discrepancies involved in
14:37people's most enduring regrets which
14:39takes an approach to regret from the
14:40self- discrepancy Theory which this is a
14:43bit more obscure than cognitive
14:44behavioral Theory and also requires you
14:46to know a bit of the theory to talk
14:47about so a very quick summary each
14:49person has three views of themselves and
14:51I will help illustrate my point here
14:52with Solus because it's uh been a minute
14:54since we actually talked about Dragon
14:55Age in this Dragon Age video the ideal
14:57self which is their internal repres
14:59representation of attributes that they
15:00or others would like them to possess
15:02like goals aspirations or Wishes the a
15:05self which is the internal
15:06representation of attributes they or
15:08others belev should possess like duties
15:10obligations or responsibilities and the
15:13actual self the internal representation
15:15of attributes a person believes they
15:17possess in this particular theory of
15:19behavior different problems arise when
15:21the discrepancies between the selves are
15:23too great which I do want to quickly say
15:25that for those of you that do have like
15:27a touch of Psych knowledge might be
15:28asking like how is this different from
15:30Freud's psychodynamic Theory and this
15:31video is not the time for place for that
15:33so uh you're just going to have to trust
15:35me that it is um at face value there's a
15:37lot of similarities but it's different
15:39anyway in the paper they dive into the
15:41idea of regret within this Theory we
15:43argue that failures to live up to one's
15:44ideal self Inspire less extensive coping
15:47efforts than failures to live up to
15:48one's Au self thus one reasons that
15:51failures to live up to the ideal self
15:53tend to remain Salient in people's minds
15:55is that they do not elicit as much
15:56psychological and behavioral repair work
15:58as failures to live up to the odd self
16:00the immediate guilt anxiety and
16:02agitation that comes from failure to
16:04live up to one's duties and
16:05responsibilities are hot emotions that
16:07beg for quick resolution in contrast the
16:10slowly accumulating disappointment
16:12discouraging and dejection that comes
16:14from failure to live up to one's goals
16:15and aspirations are less likely to
16:17elicit the same immediate reactions and
16:20after a number of studies which I'll
16:21link the paper below if you like the
16:22numbers on this they find exactly that
16:25we found that people of different ages
16:26and diverse demographics regret their
16:28failures to live up to their ideal
16:29selves more than their failures to live
16:30up to their a selves why do actual ideal
16:33discrepancies spark such enduring
16:34regrets as we found failures to act on
16:37one's ideals to not elicit the same
16:39behavioral and psychological coping
16:40efforts as failures to act on one's
16:42oughts or shoulds so and I am reading a
16:45bit between the lines here so forgive me
16:47but in this framework regret functions
16:49as a sort of measure to help balance the
16:50actual self with the ideal and the ought
16:53along with that they make the
16:54distinction between quick and enduring
16:56regrets enduring regret is the feeling
16:58of not meeting the standards you and
16:59others set for you urging you to catch
17:02up to them overall in the three
17:04definitions of regret that I laid out
17:06there is a clear theme that they agree
17:08on regret is trying to be a solution but
17:11when incorrectly thought about or acted
17:12upon can lead to problems so then what
17:16does it really mean to move past regrets
17:19I think to really explore the idea we're
17:21going to have to talk about what one
17:22would do in the real world in a
17:23therapeutic setting therapeutic
17:25practices so to begin the section we
17:28need to have a small talk on what is
17:29therapy because there are a lot of
17:31misconceptions even from people who have
17:32been to therapy now behind the curtain
17:35the short version of therapy is that
17:36there is a huge pool of researchers who
17:39have made and to the best of their
17:40abilities tested out different theories
17:42on how the mind works based on these
17:44theories tools and practices are then
17:46built to help people heal and live with
17:48various problems many of you have heard
17:50about cognitive behavioral or
17:51psychodynamic theories but what about
17:52gal existential drama the list of
17:56theories are endless and range from
17:57highly respected to downright nonsense
17:58sensical and this only includes
18:00individual therapy when you do groups or
18:02families like I did there's a whole
18:03other set of theories to work from so
18:05all is to say is that there is not just
18:07one accepted route to getting over
18:09regrets there are a thousand ways it
18:11could be done depending on how One
18:13Believes the mind works further as in
18:16part we are technically talking about
18:17spirits here which in lore have
18:19different cognitions to those born with
18:20physical forms and jumping the gun for
18:22later in the video this could be why
18:24Rook is able to escape easier than sess
18:26I have a lot of thoughts on this we're
18:27going to be placing this in a nice box
18:28and throwing it in the corner while we
18:30continue anyway despite there being a
18:32thousand one ways to get over regret
18:34there are best practices and common
18:36things that will come up so what are
18:37they using our previous talk on theories
18:39of regret I want to discuss three
18:41different paths the self-help the common
18:44and Katie's Choice I'm I'm Katie by the
18:46way I don't know if that was established
18:48yet the self-help so what do I mean by
18:50self-help basically what I mean is that
18:52there is a huge business of others
18:54trying to tell people how to get over
18:55various woses including regret with
18:57varying degrees of helpfulness and
18:59Authority on the subject so what does
19:01the internet tell you to do if you're
19:02overwhelmed with regrets better help
19:04suggest that you reflect and move on
19:06make ends of possible and forgive
19:08yourself the last two are easy enough to
19:10understand but better health explains
19:11the concept of moving on as such one way
19:14to move forward from agret is to
19:16evaluate what happened and determine
19:17what you can take away from the
19:18situation and hard times that put you
19:21there you might try to forget your inner
19:22critic for a moment and focus on what
19:24new things you've learned from your
19:25mistakes and how you're growing because
19:27of them you can practice mindfulness to
19:29acknowledge your past move forward and
19:31begin to live life in the moment and
19:34then they go into a few questions you
19:35can ask yourself to try and turn your
19:37regrets into actions and learning
19:38experiences another psych website that
19:40popped up a lot in my Google searches
19:42was very wellmind and they described
19:44getting over regret as having empathy
19:46for yourself cultivate self-compassion
19:48forgiving yourself and then journaling
19:50and seeing a therapist which not
19:52horrible advice but besides the last two
19:54those are largely the same thing we're
19:55getting desperate so how about Wiki how
19:57well there is a long list of suggestions
19:59but I would largely categorize them into
20:01self forgiveness making amends and try
20:03to forget about it and here is where I
20:05want to step in with my own experiences
20:07and the self- health movement I'm
20:09cutting down a much much longer rant
20:11that I have built up within me for the
20:12past decade or so but in general I find
20:14out there are two types of people people
20:16who love self-help advice and people who
20:18find it cringe and stupid in my opinion
20:21the people who find it silly are the
20:22ones asking how just saying to yourself
20:24I forgive myself and Let It Go will
20:27actually work those big awful problems
20:29that I regret will just go away with a
20:31canned phrase and then they get told by
20:33the self-help people that it will and it
20:34works for them and then the cynical ones
20:36try it with varying degrees of actually
20:38trying and find that it doesn't help now
20:41there is a larger discussion here on how
20:43a lot of psychology is Placebo but I
20:45think the real difference is this I find
20:47that people who enjoy self-help are the
20:49ones that already naturally had the
20:51problem worked out but needed that push
20:53who needed permission to go through with
20:56whatever was in their head or who even
20:58had the emotion but didn't know how to
21:00express it and put it into words so
21:02hearing the words that explains their
21:04emotions and thoughts helps things click
21:06into place the cynical ones though the
21:08people that think self-help is bunk
21:10those are the ones that are really lost
21:11within their problems they need more
21:13help than what nice words will get them
21:15and that's when a good therapist is
21:17needed so in short what does the common
21:19knowledge say to do to move on from
21:21regret well they say to move on to let
21:24go to think past and you either get it
21:27or you don't which is is both true and
21:29also inadequate it's like if I summarize
21:31the sellan romance as a god who's trying
21:33to destroy the world falls in love with
21:35a pretty girl and then breaks up with
21:36her you are losing all the emotion and
21:38thought behind it but what you say is
21:40technically true but I also think we
21:42shouldn't minimize simple words to help
21:44pass on emotional knowledge why I love
21:47to dunk on the self-help industry all
21:48the time in the right hands it can be a
21:50beautiful tool Katherine Schultz an
21:52author and journalist did a wonderful
21:54Ted Talk on regret ages ago while she
21:56isn't a trained psychologist I think her
21:58words cut a lot deeper than a lot of the
22:00self-help found online and in my last
22:02dig on self-help I think she's a
22:04wonderful example on why I think
22:05excellent artists will always do a
22:07better job than self-help psychologists
22:10the common I want you all to understand
22:12that the most widely passed around
22:13therapy techniques revolve around
22:15cognitive behavioral therapy or
22:17CBT there is a larger discussion here
22:19about some insurance companies paying
22:21for certain theories over others that
22:23CBT does really well in research studies
22:25but for now all you really need to know
22:27is that this is the most common therapy
22:28y theory for a reason CBT in general
22:30believes that problems arise because
22:32people are stuck in faulty thinking and
22:34learned patterns of negative behavior so
22:36the solution to any psychological
22:38problems are teaching people ways to
22:39either break the pattern or change their
22:41way of thinking now I also want to note
22:43that this is simplification and there
22:45are a ton of other factors when you
22:46bring in diagnosable conditions like
22:48bipolar disorder or schizophrenia but
22:49that has nothing to do with this video
22:51so we're moving on earlier in this video
22:52we talked about Le's work on regret and
22:54while he has a self-help book I
22:55mentioned earlier called if only I also
22:57found a lecture he did earlier this year
22:59on CBT for regrets specifically I've
23:02linked it down below for those who want
23:03to watch but keep in mind that this was
23:05for a continuing education lecture
23:07meaning that this is aimed at therapists
23:08looking to keep up with their licenses
23:10the discussion of treatment starts
23:11around the 36 minute Mark where he
23:13discusses eight styles of thinking that
23:14lead to excessive regret and talks about
23:16these thinking patterns in depth along
23:18with some therapy skills that he has
23:19done in his own practice it's very much
23:21aimed at therapist so this might be hard
23:23to follow for those not in the field or
23:24familiar with therapy but the basics of
23:26CBD treatment for regret would we Define
23:29which of these thinking patterns is the
23:30problem for the client and then trying
23:32to change and adapt those patterns so in
23:35short incognitive behavioral therapy
23:37moving on from regret would mean to find
23:40and workshop on a thinking pattern that
23:42you have that has gone ay preventing
23:44regret a functional purpose-- driven
23:46emotion from doing its job to help you
23:48learn instead of creating Loops of
23:50self-hatred and
23:52self-criticism Katie's choice so you
23:55might have see this coming because I'm
23:56following a pattern here but what is it
23:57that I want to add in our discussion of
23:59the prison of regrets will let David
24:01eyes and Gill's work on regret in self-d
24:03discrepancy Theory now again in full
24:06disclosure I have a light understanding
24:08on how self-discrepancy Theory works so
24:10I apologize if I'm getting this
24:11incorrect this is considered an odd
24:13Theory and at least a circles I hung
24:15around and would typically be used
24:16alongside a more traditional therapy
24:18theory in a critical setting if at all
24:20from what I can find studies are mixed
24:21on the validity of the theory but I
24:23think it's is a great theory for our
24:24fantasy uses and we can just have fun
24:26with it and [ __ ] it so in general enal
24:28this theory states that any negative
24:30feelings are from major discrepancy in
24:32the C either by yourself or others what
24:34was different about the paper was that
24:36where and what type of regrets fit into
24:38this model so in this model to let go of
24:41regret would be to try and fix the
24:43discrepancies of the self which
24:45obviously is way easier said than done
24:47what this looks like differs depending
24:49on the case but some examples of this
24:50would include stopping certain Behavior
24:52setting realistic goals for your ideals
24:55reframing discrepancies into a positive
24:57or in the case of self Tracy coming from
24:59the view from a person other than the
25:01self like a family member or even one's
25:03culture teaching a person
25:04self-compassion or working with one's
25:06family to edit their goals for the
25:08effective from this more balanced view
25:10of the self the regrets can be grappled
25:12and handled with care similar to the
25:14other theories you can still regret
25:15those actions that were missed or taken
25:17but with a clearer view of the self they
25:19don't weigh as heavy and they don't
25:21cause you shame applying Theory okay
25:24finally jumping back to Dragon Age let's
25:26take what we have learned and plop it
25:27onto the prison of regrets so during the
25:29course of the game we see the prison
25:31interact with a number of people and it
25:32was made to hold two very specific
25:34people so with our new lens let's take a
25:37look at what could have or did happen
25:39Rook so despite having the most
25:41information on rook and their successful
25:43Journey Through the prison I do think
25:45that there's an element of them being
25:46the player character that's hard to talk
25:47about rook's mental Journey depends on
25:50you and what you see and I don't want to
25:52squash that bit of role playing so
25:54please keep in mind that a lot of this
25:56is super open to interpretation and
25:58please fill in details that fit your
25:59Rook the best so let's start from the
26:01beginning using gillan's death to weaken
26:03the Prison Walls enough to drag rook in
26:05they fall past a few of the big moments
26:07in game the dragon that attacked the
26:09city a statue from Weiss and even
26:11falling on gillan's face before SS gives
26:13his [ __ ] little speech that tips them
26:15over the edge once in the prison Rook is
26:17met with a locked chest and Woolf
26:19statues we're going to skip that for now
26:20but I'll talk about it in a moment after
26:22that they hear veric calling for them
26:23upward where they are met with their
26:24first trial the Lost Ward breaker either
26:27never Bel chastise Rook accusing them
26:30from their choices and expressing sorrow
26:31over trusting Rook to protect them Rook
26:34chooses how to answer exactly but either
26:36line basically boils down to them
26:38challenging the premise of the regret
26:40that the breaker knew what the cost was
26:41and accepted that Rook made a choice and
26:44it ended poorly but that ending isn't a
26:46weight they have to carry because they
26:48didn't know the outcome and the real
26:50breaker knew the risks the first section
26:52is about Rook accepting that they can
26:54make choices that turn out poorly and
26:56that doesn't make them unfit to lead or
26:58or a bad person veric then has a line
27:00about Rook choosing the hard truth over
27:02the easy lie unlike sess now I've seen a
27:05lot of discussion over this mostly
27:07rejecting the idea that sess can't
27:08accept hard truths now I do want to
27:10circle around this so we are going to
27:12pin it and get back to it later next is
27:14the loss leader either Harding or Davern
27:16will confront Rook but different from
27:17the Lost breaker their understanding of
27:20rook's choice they appreciate Rook for
27:22the help they have given them for the
27:23sacrifices that they took and express
27:26that they wanted to give their all as
27:27well so they did Rook talks about
27:30honoring their sacrifice and that they
27:32will continue the mission that they were
27:33set out to do this second section is
27:35about Rook letting go of the guilt they
27:37carry when things go wrong they honor
27:39the dead best by carrying on rather than
27:41focusing on how they failed them Solus
27:44on the other hand saw everyone like a
27:45pond to be used another pin here we'll
27:48get back to it later finally you were
27:50confronted by the truth of what happened
27:52to veric Rook is shaken by the truth but
27:54veric Comforts them he made the choice
27:56to talk to soless and Rook has no blame
27:58on what happened to him Rook did the
28:00best they could given circumstances this
28:03third section is about Rook forgiving
28:05themselves for their failure to protect
28:06veric they acknowledged that they did
28:08the best they could but it still wasn't
28:10enough now I will say that there is an
28:12argument that this veric is still a
28:14byproduct of souls's blood magic he
28:16appears different from the other regrets
28:18and is able to hold a conversation with
28:19Rook it could even be the regret prison
28:22is using the blood magic curse to its
28:23advantage using var's memory to talk to
28:25Rook as veric proper compared to Rook
28:28warped view of the leader or the breaker
28:29through the lens of their regrets given
28:32that veric was killed with the lium
28:33dagger it could be possible that there
28:35was a piece of veric that lingered in
28:37the lium and attached itself to Rook he
28:40does call himself a memory which larium
28:42is known to absorb this spirals out into
28:44its own video topic one day but yeah
28:46it's possible Rook is talking to a
28:48version of veric himself uh Rook might
28:50also have lium poisoning if we want to
28:52get spicy with this Theory but that's
28:54that's for another day with all that
28:55boiled down to its basic structure let's
28:57apply some of our theories because at
28:59its core the regret prison is just a
29:02[ __ ] up therapy session which I
29:05actually love this because therapy can
29:06be quite hard emotionally so therapy as
29:09a form of torture for Gods is like super
29:11amusing I I just love it so much anyway
29:13we'll be focusing on CBT and self-
29:15discrepancy theories because the easy
29:17Define self-help take on regret is
29:19basically therapy theories without
29:20background and understanding it's a
29:22purely emotional way to work on feelings
29:24and in a way that's exactly what the
29:25game gives you and is expected and
29:27correct and stream media games are art
29:29and good art communicates through
29:31emotion is trying to show not tell
29:33cognitive behavioral Theory let's start
29:35off with Ley styles of thinking that
29:37lead to regrets I think there are
29:38Arguments for like a lot of these in the
29:40regret prison but personally I think the
29:42big hook to it all is the last one the
29:44hindsight bias to put it simply
29:46hindsight bias is holding yourself up to
29:48the standard of knowledge that you have
29:49now rather than when an event happened
29:51Brook should have known that the leader
29:52of the Strike Team would take charge and
29:54die Rook should have known that sess
29:56would stab thek Rook should have known
30:00but they didn't they couldn't they can't
30:02control others choices that lead to
30:03their deaths Rook is human they make
30:06mistakes they have to lead without
30:07knowing everything as all leaders must
30:09do the journey through the regret prison
30:12is in its own aggressive way showing
30:14Rook the fallacy of their thinking
30:16through an altered version of an empty
30:18chair technique what is that well the
30:20empty chair technique is technically
30:22made for Gestalt Theory but this has
30:24been cannibalized by all sorts of
30:25theories and it's actually very common
30:26in CBT as well I link a very short video
30:29down below that gives a good example on
30:30how it would be used in a real world
30:32therapeutic setting if you want like
30:33finer details but the short of it is
30:35this you face an empty chair and imagine
30:37a person you want to talk to and then
30:39you do you tell the chair what you
30:41wanted to say what you wanted to
30:43apologize for what you wanted to say
30:45before they died all except for veric
30:47you give Rook a prompt for conversation
30:49like a therapist would and Rook is able
30:51to fill in their thoughts and work
30:53through what happened on their own
30:55through this aggressive magical version
30:57of an empty chair Tech te Rook takes the
30:58time to verbalize and process all that
31:01has happened and can see the fallacy of
31:03their hindsight bias freeing them from
31:05the prison so through this lens how did
31:08Rook let go of their regret they took
31:10the time to process and verbalize their
31:11feelings on their failure as a leader
31:13realizing that they are holding
31:14themselves to an impossible expectation
31:16of a perfect outcome when they allow
31:17others to make their own choices and
31:19forgive themselves for having limited
31:21knowledge of advents self-discrepancy
31:23Theory so again it's hard to analyze
31:25Rook because you as a player pump in a
31:27lot lot of personality and ideas onto
31:29the character and I don't want to
31:31influence you but this is at least how I
31:33see my Rook Rowena through this Theory
31:35and you can play with yours as you see
31:36fit you should remember that in this
31:38Theory there are three views of the self
31:40the actual Rook is just your player
31:42character as they are Rowena is a Stern
31:45and competent enough wor Watcher she
31:47cares for others perhaps too much at
31:48times and sees herself as someone who
31:50took up leadership because no one else
31:52would the ideal Rook is what your
31:54character wishes they would be Rowena
31:56wants to use her leadership to save
31:58everyone each life is precious and
32:00should be respected and cared for and
32:02she wants to live by those values and
32:04the UT Rook is what your character
32:06should be Rowena is the only one able to
32:09get information and guidance from Solas
32:11she alone has the knowledge and means to
32:13kill the remaining of aurous that she
32:14freed by accident she must be the leader
32:17of the veil guard to save the world in
32:19this Theory I believe each of the
32:21sections of the gret prison appeal to
32:23each of the selves the Lost breaker to
32:25the a self because they chastised Rook
32:27for not living up to their Duty as the
32:29leader to protect people the Lost leader
32:31to the ideal S as rook's example and
32:33Leadership inspired their actions of
32:35self-sacrifice and veric to the actual
32:37self as he talks to Rook about who they
32:39are now that they did well enough and
32:41they have what they need at this moment
32:43to stop soulless rook's Journey Through
32:46the prison and responses to the Lost
32:47companions are helping to level out
32:49their views of themselves and Leadership
32:51and they find that despite all the
32:53problems and setbacks they have
32:54encountered on their Journey that
32:56doesn't reflect on them poorly as as a
32:58leader so through this lens how did Rook
33:00let go of their Regrets by confronting
33:02the ghosts of those their leadership has
33:03wronged they're able to verbalize and
33:06process their failures while recognizing
33:07that they did the best they could given
33:09everything that has happened and that
33:11even leaders cannot control every aspect
33:13of situation this then helps even out
33:15the views of their different
33:17selves the evanuris Gillan and elron do
33:20not regret this is again something that
33:23Solus writes about in The Wolf Den codex
33:25but he built the cage locked with regret
33:27anyway couldn't they just walk out
33:28because they don't give a [ __ ] well no I
33:31stated earlier what causes the rift to
33:32open in the first place is feeling those
33:35regrets but even if they were to start
33:37processing those regrets and open the
33:39rift the prison would then be able to
33:40drag them down and start to taunt them
33:42until they were able to really grapple
33:44with their feelings while we did get
33:46insight into who elran and gillain were
33:48as people I'm not sure we really have
33:50enough to do a deep psychological dive
33:52that said I do want to point out one
33:54codex entry in note to Elon found during
33:56the Isle of Gods Quest you see a letter
33:58to elron from Gilly you have also kindly
34:01suggested I spend time to mourn but
34:03andrul is lost gone is attribute to her
34:06skill that our people's descendants
34:07remember her as she was a warrior of
34:10supreme skill lethal Swift unsurpassed I
34:14look forward to building a monument to
34:15her in our new Empire also using another
34:18codex from soless to Gill talking about
34:19her rise to godhead we know that her
34:21andrw were lovers for ages obviously we
34:24don't know how the relationship work but
34:26I feel like this is such a cal way to
34:28talk about a dead loved one now it's
34:30clear in the language Gil cares for
34:31andrel deeply but I mean callous to
34:33herself and her own emotions she doesn't
34:36want to show weakness in the face of her
34:38loss even though elron can seem to sense
34:40or at least predict it and I think this
34:42is a good example of their mental state
34:44these are beings who are older than
34:46almost everything we know who wake up
34:48from imprisonment to see everything they
34:50have built everyone who they have loved
34:52is gone yet they don't mourn they
34:54compartmentalize and start a new on
34:56controlling thetas they have put aside
34:58all they have with the justification
35:00that once they have enough power then it
35:02will be time to build that Monument to
35:05mourn and process but the trick is they
35:08will never have enough power there will
35:10always be more to find more to want
35:13solis's prison is an acknowledgement of
35:15that putting them in their lowest
35:17knowing that they will never process but
35:19at the same time there is a glimmer of
35:21hope that perhaps they can change for
35:23the better even if soless himself has no
35:25faith in that idea besides all this is
35:27there any literature on people who don't
35:29feel regrets keeping this section short
35:31but Ley briefly mentions this in his
35:33webinar basically he describes people
35:35with a deficit of regret as those who
35:37tend to be impulsive and think they can
35:39handle more than they can because they
35:40have not learned from their past
35:41behaviors his examples are largely about
35:44substance abuse but I think the evanuris
35:46has Ed the blight and the addicting
35:47power it brings fits in well with his
35:49view of regret if we take the self-
35:51discrepancy theory on regret here it
35:53would be a very simple model they see
35:55themselves as Gods their actual self is
35:57perfectly aligned with their ideal and
35:58their odd selves how could they regret
36:00when they are Perfection the only time
36:03there seems to be a break in this
36:04balance is when Gillan is dying she
36:06laments to elron that they had so many
36:08plans for this world in this moment is
36:11her regret because In This Moment the
36:13vision of herself as a God does not
36:15match with her reality a dying mortal
36:19soulless uh first if you remembered I
36:21pinned two comments from rook's time in
36:22the prison about soless so here I want
36:24to address those first and then we'll
36:25get to there's just a lot I have to say
36:27on soless guys I'm so sorry hard truths
36:29over the easy lie so in this argument
36:32soless grapples with a lot of his hard
36:33truths and trespasser he has accepted
36:36his guilt over his role in the fall of
36:37arthan and the elan people he accepts
36:40that his Veil and imprisonment of the
36:41evanuris is what did all of that where
36:44is the easy lie you love the fade why
36:47would you create the veil to hide it all
36:50away because every alternative was worse
36:53it's right there there is no way to know
36:56for certain that the veil was the best
36:57option it certainly could have been the
36:59best option that he had come up with at
37:01that time but to say that everything was
37:03worse is a comforting lie something that
37:06I think is also reflected in the short
37:07story callback from tender Knights when
37:10the regret demon that was born of
37:11souls's regret dies there is a glimpse
37:13of what it could have been for a moment
37:16the sunlight illuminated something
37:17within a sliver of the spirit that might
37:19have been not the opposite of regret a
37:22different flavor or shade contemplation
37:25introspection it felt the echo of the
37:27actions that had summoned it there might
37:29have been a better choice to the thought
37:31it had not been allowed the comforting
37:34lie that soless has been telling himself
37:36is what veric tells Rook at the end of
37:37the prison soless can't grapple with the
37:40hard truth that he isn't as wise as he
37:42should be he lost that part of himself
37:44when he gained the body he can't accept
37:47that he would make choices that aren't
37:49the best and when I say that I don't
37:51mean he blindly refuses to acknowledge
37:53that he [ __ ] up or make stupid choices
37:55because he clearly does that at the end
37:56of Inquisition when talking to fouth and
37:58has dialogue calling his younger self
38:00foolish what I mean is that he can't
38:02forgive himself for it he can't forgive
38:05himself for failing and making poor
38:07choices and he's burdened with that
38:09shame the comforting lie that he tells
38:12himself is that he's just the villain so
38:14of course he made bad decision that gets
38:16people killed of course his choices hurt
38:18others and those around him Solace is a
38:20bad person and so he makes the decisions
38:22that get good people killed people as
38:25pawns if you were taking in all of
38:27dragon media in chronological order the
38:29very first time you meet solos be when
38:31he stabs fisan in the back at the end of
38:33Mast Empire now this wouldn't be
38:35confirmed until trespasser but it's him
38:37all the same as shown in Veil guard
38:39where it's one of the regretful remnants
38:41that you find the crossroads the
38:43argument I see is that soless obviously
38:45cares for people as people he approves
38:47of helping the common folk in
38:48Inquisition and generally cares for
38:50others in his dialogue and ban her my
38:53argument is that those two ideas are not
38:55mutually exclusive soless can care and
38:58appreciate people and loved ones and
39:00then turn around and use them when it
39:02furthers his goals I would argue for a
39:05majority of the people we see Solus
39:06betray he tries to soften the blow to
39:09make it as kind of a betrayal as
39:11possible with The Inquisitor even one
39:13that he hates he is polite and saves
39:15their life all the while letting them
39:16deal with a canari that are in his
39:17crossword network with the spirits he
39:20kills off in one of his memories he
39:21tells fisan that they died true to their
39:23nature something I would argue he wishes
39:26he could do even with Rook whom he knows
39:28he lumped with a heavy burden of
39:30responsibility he relieves them of their
39:32duties before they fall into the prison
39:34something that emotionally breaks him
39:36when mthal does the same action in the
39:38redeem ending this all Loops into that
39:40easy lie he tells himself he needs to
39:42fix his mistakes to become that hero
39:44again so why not let a few go by his
39:47caring hand to save the rest all right
39:50moving on let's talk about that chest in
39:51the regret prison to unlock it you need
39:53to find three wolf statues and gather
39:55the momentos inside the chest are a few
39:57runes and some Elvin armor and whatever
40:00my theory is that the three momentos
40:02were to be sess' trials that he did not
40:04complete so let's talk about that the
40:06three momentos are as such the remnant
40:09of failure which uses the broken orb
40:10model from Dragon Age Inquisition orb
40:13shards broken by misplaced trust slivers
40:15of an irretrievable power the kindling
40:17of regrets humming with a diffuse lost
40:20Vitality the remnant of reflection which
40:22uses the model of solace's paint palette
40:24uh we know as a Sol paint palette
40:26because you can find it in the
40:27Lighthouse it's also in the art book but
40:28it's not really to talked about in game
40:30whatever ages of paint stone dry and
40:33volcanically uneven capture Eerie
40:35splashes of strange azures unsettling
40:37Scarlets and cheric ambers colors to
40:39match the eye of an Elven God and
40:42finally the remnant of parting which
40:44uses a tiny golden version of the dragon
40:46methal statue methal and Dragon Aspect
40:48offers different wisdoms and protections
40:50striding with the powers of hidden ways
40:53fingerprints Mar the golden shine as if
40:55well handled before I launch into this
40:57next pick I do want to address one thing
40:59I have heard the question of why did
41:01soless creator of the Trap and known
41:03emotionally intelligent overthinker not
41:04attempt the trials and free himself and
41:06I think the last momento is the answer I
41:09think he did perhaps multiple times but
41:11got stuck here methal and what she
41:13represents is just too much would take
41:16too long and he knew this switching with
41:19Rook was the quickest solution to get
41:21out and save the world from the fre
41:22evanuris I think there's also an element
41:25of similarity between the evanuris and
41:26soless in this aspect that I think has
41:28led to his own moral corruption while
41:31the Evan nura seem to bottle the regrets
41:32and therefore do not learn from their
41:34mistakes behind the wall of when I have
41:36enough power I'll deal with this soless
41:38actually has the same problem but
41:40instead of power I believe he tells
41:42himself when my work is done a subtle
41:45but similar enough emotional trap
41:47because now he believes he's the only
41:49person who can write his wrongs he's the
41:51only one with the right knowledge an
41:53unwilling God and I also think he knows
41:55this he knows he's being corrupted by
41:57taking on all the trouble of the world
41:59and not taking care of his own emotional
42:01state but the last time he let someone
42:03else try to do a job he should have done
42:06mthal was murdered and after all he only
42:09needs to do just one more thing just
42:11take down the veil and it's all over and
42:14then he can atone if you remember when I
42:16was talking about Rook I broke down
42:18their trials largely about their regrets
42:19on their choices their guilt and their
42:21failure looking at the momentos they
42:23break down into the medium in which
42:25Solus expresses his poor choices is a
42:27reminder of sess' failure to methal and
42:29a remnant of sess' guilt on his
42:31inability to fix his mistakes hey wait
42:34isn't the one you labeled as
42:35representing his guilt literally called
42:36Remnant a failure okay I I
42:39mean yeah okay yeah but I do think there
42:42is a disconnect to the word and the
42:44momento and what it represents Sol says
42:46in the redeem ending that he failed
42:48methal and talks about his guilt and the
42:50people he has wronged AKA The Inquisitor
42:52I think in this case there is just a
42:54misalignment in the naming of the
42:55momentos and I don't want to call it a
42:57glitch uh but I am just saying that the
42:59orb being called remnant of parting
43:01makes a lot more sense than the methal
43:02statue given the last time that we saw
43:04it was the last time the Inquisitor saw
43:05Souls before he left this is me coping
43:08fine whatever fine fine side note I
43:10think you could also make an argument
43:11that this same true of emotional trials
43:13makes its appearances again during the
43:15redeem ending Rook is there reflecting
43:17the sols on his mistakes and regrets
43:19like his murals that he painted in the
43:20lighthouse The Inquisitor is there
43:22representing the people he has wronged
43:24like the orb the central artifact in
43:25Inquisition and Morgan as the host of
43:28mythal's memories is there to challenge
43:29his view on his failure to her so then
43:33how would Solace move on from his
43:35regrets so we do get a small piece of
43:37this puzzle and game during the redeem
43:38ending it has to do with mythal while
43:41the inquisitor's forgiveness and Rook
43:42slv's appeal is no small part methal
43:44does something that The Inquisitor and
43:46veric simply could not the reality is
43:49that mythal's relationship with sess is
43:50kept intentionally vague is she his
43:52lover his friend his Queen his mother
43:54his owner the true answer is up to you
43:57and play around with in your version of
43:58thus uh but you're already deep into me
44:01talking about my own Theory so it's my
44:02take uh my view on the relationship is
44:05that they were all of it they have known
44:09each other for eons their relationship
44:11has been warped and changed in various
44:13ways throughout time and the only
44:14constant of the relationship was defined
44:16in the music room codex they understood
44:19each other and I would say both were
44:21scared to let that go doing my best to
44:23not give another giant therapy lecture
44:25but you give me two people a horrible
44:27relationship I I I just love it I this
44:30is my curse this is my burden I
44:32mentioned earlier that family therapy is
44:33different theories than individual uh so
44:36the one I worked with the most was
44:37called structural the very shortened
44:39version of the theory is that each
44:40family or couple unit has a structure to
44:42how they work there is that Dynamic
44:44there that you can map out analyze and
44:46point out flaws to make the unit work
44:49properly it's a little bit like CBT but
44:52for a group kind of trying to shorten a
44:54big rant but I would consider methal and
44:56soless to have have at one point been in
44:58meshed with one another what does that
45:01mean enmeshment is basically the term
45:03for when two people or even a whole
45:05family unit do not have proper personal
45:08boundaries this can look like different
45:09things depending on what type of
45:10relationship we're talking about but
45:12with methal and soless the problem is
45:14that we don't know what the relationship
45:16is and I don't mean because we weren't
45:18given enough details but I honestly
45:20think in lore these two gained bodies
45:23and had no idea how to be people they
45:26didn't know what they wanted to be to
45:27each other or themselves so they tried
45:30to be everything they cared deeply for
45:32one another but were young and had no
45:35idea how relationships work when you
45:37have more depths of emotion she tried to
45:39mother and Rule him at the same time he
45:41tried to guide and protect her they
45:44meant everything to each other and I
45:46mean everything and it hurt them deeply
45:49when they disappointed one another
45:50because I'm trying to avoid another
45:52giant lecture on enmeshment I've linked
45:53a few videos about it below and I would
45:55recommend watching them if you want to
45:56get a idea on how I at least see the
45:58methal soless dynamic but whatever so
46:01what does methal do that veric fison and
46:03The Inquisitor just couldn't she set a
46:06boundary in their relationship in Her
46:08speech to him she one acknowledges that
46:11she used him and that it hurt him two
46:14takes responsibility by shouldering her
46:16part of the blame that he has taken on
46:18completely and three let's go of all
46:21connections and expectations of him
46:24whatever they were before they now
46:27strictly just old friends a relationship
46:30title that does not carry emotional
46:32expectations he is no longer her weapon
46:35and he can choose to be who he wants to
46:37be while he heard that term various
46:40times from mythal's fragment he never
46:42heard it from her whole and that's who
46:44he needed to hear it from and here is
46:47when I want to Loop in the self-
46:48discrepancy Theory because I love this
46:50Theory with spirits and I think solist
46:52and the rest of the original Elven still
46:54have this mindset I've been using Solus
46:57as the example this whole time because
46:59this is really what I've been wanting to
47:00talk about since I started this video
47:02solace's Au self is what mythal made him
47:06to be this is soless as the fixer sess
47:10as the Catalyst to change this is the
47:12soless methal asked for and put into her
47:15service the man who time and again she
47:18asked to resolve an impossible problem
47:21and he did so but bent to her Wills even
47:24when he did not think it was wise her
47:26will was his duty when methal frees him
47:30of her service that slot is now replaced
47:32by what he wants it to be the hero that
47:34derck describes him being deep down the
47:37man Cole references in one of his
47:38trespasser dialogues barefaced but free
47:42frolicking biting fears he wants to give
47:45wisdom not orders so what about CBT in
47:48Le's list of mental Loops that trap you
47:50in regret I think there are a few that
47:51you can apply to soless so then it would
47:53just be a matter of him working out one
47:55of those mental Loops but even in this
47:56series I think a lot of them revolve
47:58around mythal's emotional hole and
47:59soulless this is where I go off the cuff
48:02a bit because while a he doesn't bring
48:03up what I'm about to talk about in his
48:05webinar it does come up in his book and
48:06a few interviews he did what Solace is
48:09constantly saying when talking about
48:10taking down the veil can be summarized
48:12up with I don't want to do this but I
48:14have to we have theorized on why he
48:17feels like he has to for ages but Veil
48:19guard gives us an answer he feels like
48:21he has to because he sacrificed
48:23everything he was for methal in her
48:25vision of the elant Empire to stop
48:28chasing that goal would be to let all
48:30his sins be for not basically soless is
48:33caught up in the sunk cost fallacy if
48:35you are unfamiliar with sunk cost in
48:37short it's an economics principle that
48:39has been taken on in various
48:40psychological ones as well in the world
48:42of cognitive Psych the Sun cause
48:44fallacies when you keep pouring your
48:46time and energy on something because you
48:48have already put way too much into it
48:50Solus has put too much of himself in her
48:53goals for the Elven Empire so when the
48:55mythal fragment ch chastises him for
48:57continuing a vision that she no longer
48:59believes in of course he claims that
49:01she's not really methal he knows she's
49:03only part of herself the other part he
49:05locked away perhaps scared to visit her
49:07because she too might have the same
49:09opinion so when those two parts are
49:11brought together and tells him that he
49:13is no longer bound by her Wills she is
49:15stopping that fallacy she breaks off
49:17that sunk cost ending it for him and
49:20thus he is able to act on his own wants
49:22and desires that he has not allowed
49:24himself to for who knows how long now
49:26why couldn't fisan the Inquisitor of
49:28Eric or Rook break that for him because
49:31they all certainly tried in their own
49:32way well again this has to do with his
49:35relationship with methal and how wrapped
49:36up she is in his life mthal was the only
49:39one to be there at almost every step to
49:41make the same mistakes he did and to
49:44show him that she set down that goal as
49:46well she did so he should only she could
49:49tell him that now before I go into the
49:51next section I do want to lightly touch
49:53on the idea of methal being abusive to
49:55Solas as she's the one egging him on in
49:57almost all of their regret murals now as
50:00is pointed out in game the murals are
50:02made from solace's memory so it paints a
50:04one-sided picture of their relationship
50:06here is where I'm holding back a larger
50:08conversation about how unreliable
50:10memories are because honestly it doesn't
50:11really matter what the truth is this is
50:14how so sees the relationship he's
50:16sorrowful over a deep relationship one
50:18he cared so much for and sacrificed
50:20everything for but would constantly ask
50:22too much and not support him in return
50:25was she abusive I'm going to be the
50:27controversial one and say I don't know
50:28if we have those details psychological
50:31abuse in a critical setting is defined
50:33as patterns of behavior and a small
50:35handful of conversations from a
50:36relationship that lasted thousands of
50:38years is really not that much granted we
50:41are talking about a fantasy relationship
50:43real relationships completely different
50:44if you have this many conversations with
50:46loved one it sounds like this that that
50:48that's that's bad don't don't be with
50:50someone like this but I do think we can
50:53say without a doubt that they hurt each
50:55other deeply I see the relationship as a
50:57very real and raw exploration of where
51:00things aren't black and white yes it was
51:03methal that urged him to take a body he
51:04hated but he never told her no to
51:06sundering the Titans even though he knew
51:08it was a bad idea yes it was methal that
51:11took on the mantle of a God but soless
51:13was willing to sacrifice millions in
51:15taking down the veil and was upset that
51:16she didn't accept that I've seen fans on
51:20various social media platforms argue
51:21over who was right but the point is
51:23neither of them were sometimes people
51:26who were good as individuals pair up and
51:28corrupt each other in the end your
51:31interpretation of the relationship is
51:32the correct one but I see it as the
51:35tragedy of a bad relationship and that
51:37sometimes love is not enough and in this
51:40case love can deeply wound lellan hey
51:45we're talking about the regret prison
51:47here why am I waffling on about the
51:48romance well because I'm a dirty Sil
51:50lellan you better [ __ ]
51:53accept uh but if you did not play Veil
51:55guard with a soless romance then you
51:56might not know that during his redeem
51:58ending lellan can go with soless to be
52:00with her love for all eternity I'm not
52:03here to Deep dive into the ending slides
52:04yet but take a look at these in the
52:06ending slides for the violent trick and
52:08both redeem endings there are subtle
52:10differences between them that I think
52:11speak volumes to sess' mental state at
52:13the end of the game in the violent
52:16ending where he's dragged to his prison
52:17yelling that he is a god which is in
52:19character I will I we're not talking
52:22about this now but that is that is in
52:23character and I will actually fight you
52:25I'm just I'm just saying I'm just saying
52:27anyway Solas is dressed in full armor
52:30falling into dark depths of the regret
52:32prison likely to live out his days like
52:33the ous were to live in the trick ending
52:36where he is dragged into the prison
52:37stating that he is a fool and he was
52:39outmatched he falls into the Golden
52:41Abyss dressed in armor but one more
52:42plain I think in this interpretation of
52:44the signes he will one day be able to
52:46Grapple with his regrets in the
52:47non-romance redeeming you see him walk
52:49into the golden prison dressed in robes
52:51similar to that in his various tarot
52:52cards he will find his atonement faster
52:55already able to start his journey the
52:57moment he enters and finally in the
52:59romance ending he is still to embrace
53:01lellan dressed in clothes that are
53:03reminiscent of his casual wear and
53:04Inquisition levelin is a unique aspect
53:07in the prison because for all we know
53:09the prison is not designed to handle
53:11more than one person her presence isn't
53:13unknown and from the little tidbits we
53:15have from Death post it's one that can
53:17dismantle some of the more grueling
53:18aspects of the prison lelen tells soless
53:21and I think truly believes that his
53:23prison won't be terrible if she's with
53:25him in the fade that sincere belief is
53:29everything and I honestly believe her
53:31love would fundamentally change the
53:32magic of the prison she has been chasing
53:35down Solas for a decade trying to
53:37convince him to stop and she just did
53:39she won she's reunited with her true
53:42love and while I'm sure she has regrets
53:44they are far from her mind and in this
53:46moment they are glowing but what about
53:49the more practical aspects of the prison
53:51is llln Immortal now that she's in the
53:52fade can you eat can you sleep weeks has
53:55basically said that it's up to us as as
53:56players to decide what story we like
53:58better levillain can live happily
53:59forever after or if you like the drama
54:01of her only living a few short years
54:03before dying then that's the story you
54:04can have I do think personally llln
54:07would be immortal in the prison I'm
54:09certain soless could work something out
54:10and if nothing else being in the fade
54:12could trigger whatever makes elves
54:14Immortal now another question to ask is
54:16how the time works keep in mind that
54:19Rook was there for an hour or so to them
54:21but their companions note that it was
54:23days even weeks of them missing a year
54:25to our happy couple could be an age to
54:28thetus I also think that there are some
54:30small leaks to the outside world as well
54:32given that Solus is able to make sense
54:34of Rumblings in the fade about rook's
54:35Adventures so there might be a way to
54:38listen in to the outside world Solus
54:41talks about calming the blight during
54:42both redeem endings I've seen popular
54:44head cannons about the two walking the
54:46black City together trying to make a
54:47golden again on on one hand I don't
54:50think they would be able to do that from
54:52the prison unless lellan was able to
54:53change the boundaries that much it would
54:56just just be a bad idea to have such
54:58access to the evanuris given that that's
55:00where the rest of the blight is and they
55:01could probably do a lot with that on the
55:04other hand if we take the ending slides
55:07at face value all versions of solos are
55:09now located in the same bubble as the
55:11black City so if they could travel there
55:13then yes maybe they do physically clean
55:15up the black City personally I take the
55:18idea that solos can somehow interact
55:20with dreams of the titans from the
55:21regret prison via his dreams and not
55:23like physically and that perhaps slowly
55:26turns the city golden again Gil and elar
55:29do talk briefly about dreaming in their
55:31prison and talk about a discordant
55:33refrain this video is long enough so I'm
55:35won't borrow you with all the references
55:37but the blight is said to have a song in
55:39its call so I believe that even in the
55:41original design of the prison the
55:44evanuris were doomed to hear the sad
55:46calling of their blight forever so I
55:48imagine soless set up something similar
55:50for the regret prison I don't think we
55:52will ever get a solid answer on what the
55:54redeem prison is like partly because
55:56because I've already seen people having
55:57a lot of fun playing around with that
55:59idea and I doubt the devs want to
56:00solidify anything that avoids that but
56:03one thing I want to say is this Solace
56:05does not need lellan to heal from his
56:07regrets this is a journey he must and
56:10can do on his own a harsh but true
56:12lesson in life love cannot heal all
56:15wounds but only in the romance ending
56:17the soless game what he has fought for
56:19for his entire life to be understood by
56:23another and for her to choose him in
56:25return he is not dressed for battle or
56:28for travel he is dressed for comfort for
56:32home and that your patrons is all that I
56:34have on the regret prison and uh
56:37probably a lot more than that we sort of
56:39kind of rolled around a bunch of topics
56:40a bit here and there but I just love
56:42this so much and just vomited out a
56:44whole bunch of stuff I wanted to talk
56:46about um but thank you for being so
56:48patient I worked really hard on this
56:50because I just really like this topic
56:52it's very nostalgic for me in a way
56:53because I found Dragon Age when I was uh
56:55in my my master's program so like
56:57getting to apply these series to a new
56:59Dragon Age game was really fun um but
57:01yeah this was uh my pet project and I
57:03don't know if I'll do another one of
57:05these in again but uh you know whatever
57:07but what do you all think do you still
57:09have Loring questions proof that I'm
57:10wrong comments about your own fan Theory
57:12feel free to tweet me at Guild athon on
57:14Twitter or blue sky to rest your
57:25all e

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