“Marsh on Mars” | Inanimate Insanity S2E2 — Transcript

Full transcript

1. 0:01Hey, Soap! Wanna hear a joke?
2. 0:03Sure! As long as it isn't a dirty one...
3. 0:06(panting)
4. 0:10(knee slap)
5. 0:12Hey, Marshmallow! I think you're really stupid!
6. 0:15Well, you're really, really stupid!
7. 0:17Oh no you didn't!
8. 0:19Hah! It's funny 'cause they're immature.
9. 0:22HEY!
10. 0:22You forgot Apple's horrifyingly raspy voice.
11. 0:26And Marshmallow's voice that is shattering glass!
12. 0:28HEY!
13. 0:29(Test Tube breaks)
14. 0:30Hey, that joke wasn't clean!
15. 0:32Look at all this glass! Shameful.
16. 0:37Thanks a lot! I spent a lot of time on that gag!
17. 0:42I'm Apple! I'm severely premature, and I have the IQ of a doorknob!
18. 0:49I'm Marshmallow! I ruin holidays for people, because, you know, it's SO HILARIOUS!
19. 0:54I do not...
20. 0:56Do too! You ruined Christmas for me!
21. 0:58Why do you think I hate you, anyway?
22. 1:00Ohh... I never realized that's the reason why you're so upset!
23. 1:05Paintbrush and I never meant to hurt you, we just wanted to preserve your feelings.
24. 1:09Wait, seriously? I can't believe I've been mad at you for that!
25. 1:13I've been acting so spiteful, whatever that means.
26. 1:15Well, we don't have to be friends, but I definitely think a truce is in order!
27. 1:21Truce?
28. 1:22Truce!
29. 1:23My gag was great! They're going to pay for their rude remarks!
30. 1:28AAAAAHHHH!!!
31. 1:31WHAT? Marshmallow! Who's responsible for this!?
32. 1:34Oh... It was...
33. 1:36Box! I saw the whole thing with my own four eyes!
34. 1:42Lightbulb! Box launched our team member into the ectosphere!
35. 1:46What? I did not permit you to do that.
36. 1:49Looks like I have no choice! Box, you're going to the calm-down corner.
37. 1:52W-wow, i-isn't that bit harsh?
38. 1:55Nothing is too harsh for this inexcusable offense.
39. 1:58He must suffer for his actions.
40. 2:04(Intro)
41. 2:16Hey, Bright Lights! Your dull performance last episode has caused you to be up for elimination.
42. 2:21Everyone ready?
43. 2:22Well, actually, I had a question about...
44. 2:24Um...
45. 2:26Yes?
46. 2:27Uh... Darn it! I forgot!
47. 2:29Oh, bummer, I really wanted to hear that question.
48. 2:32Oh well. Let's see who will be the first to go home this season.
49. 2:35WAIT! I remember!
50. 2:36So I want to introduce you guys to our newest cast member!
51. 2:39Oh, thank you, sir!
52. 2:41I can always count on him, he's always here for me!
53. 2:44Oh, stop it, you.
54. 2:46This person is also my NEW assistant!
55. 2:48Oh my gosh, I-
56. 2:49MePad!
57. 2:51(Toilet flush)
58. 2:53But-but sir...
59. 2:55What? He's just here to read the elimination votes.
60. 2:58But sir, I'm your new assistant!
61. 3:00I should read the votes!
62. 3:02Right. And what kind of processor do YOU have?
63. 3:05I have the new A6 chip, with a quad-four dual processor.
64. 3:08Exactly.
65. 3:09Cherries, give me a mask!
66. 3:11I'm MePad, I'm an idiot, BUHKGUAGHKUA!
67. 3:14Not to be rude, but you should behave more professionally in your work environment.
68. 3:18-What the beans does that mean!?
69. 3:20-MePad, start the elimination!
70. 3:22-Of course.
71. 3:25-Mistah Phone?
72. 3:26-Hey, can you go get me some, uh, some wires?
73. 3:30-Sure thing, Mistah Phone!
74. 3:32-Works like a charm.
75. 3:33Anyway, we got prizes!
76. 3:35if you know,
77. 3:36If you're saef, you'll get a prize.
78. 3:38And this month's prizes are oatmeal raisin cookies!
79. 3:41Sir, I'm sorry but according to the latest poll, 0% of the population like oatmeal raisin.
80. 3:47I suggest you not make that decision again...
81. 3:49What? Oatmeal...
82. 3:50RAISINS!? UGH! Gross!
83. 3:52-I-I kinda like oatmeal raisin...
84. 3:56Wait, what are you guys looking at?
85. 3:58Guys! Oatmeal raisin's the reason for global warning guys?!
86. 4:02True...
87. 4:03Anyway... The following people are safe!
88. 4:06Paintbrush, Lightbulb, and Fan.
89. 4:08(Catches)
90. 4:09(Lightbulb eats)
91. 4:10MMM! I love that oatmealy raisiny taste!
92. 4:13So is Marshmallow.
93. 4:14(Cookie hit)
94. 4:15Wait, what the..
95. 4:17MEPHONE! Box sent Marshmallow to space!
96. 4:20Woah..
97. 4:20She landed all the way on Mars.
98. 4:22Yikes!
99. 4:23Do you guys even realize how serious this is?
100. 4:26Pff, more serious than oatmeal raisin?
101. 4:28Marshmallow is in space!
102. 4:30Yeah, guys, if you studied object anatomy,
103. 4:32you would know that the objects die within an hour of being out of our atmosphere!
104. 4:36Yeah, but if she dies out of orbit, I won't be able to bring her back!
105. 4:39Seems logical!
106. 4:40Well, our viewers are more important, honestly.
107. 4:43So let's do the elimination first.
108. 4:45But, she could DIIIIE!
109. 4:48I know, could you imagine the lawsuits?
110. 4:49Let's quickly get this done!
111. 4:51Test Tube and Cherries are also safe.
112. 4:53Congrats.
113. 4:55Wow! Can you imagine the molecular structure?
114. 4:57Yeah! I can!
115. 4:58And it's boring me to tears!
116. 5:00MEPHONE: You three are left.
117. 5:01Yin-Yang, you are reckless and fight with yourself.
118. 5:05I mean, that's pretty weird.
119. 5:06YIN: It's weird, I'm sorry for all the trouble we are causing.
120. 5:10YANG: NO! I'M NOT!
121. 5:11YOU'RE JUST DUMB! IDIOT!
122. 5:13Um, Tissues just is...disgusting.
123. 5:17No I'm not, it's my condishawn...
124. 5:19(Sneeze)
125. 5:20And Apple, you're really stupid.
126. 5:21Half the words you see, you don't even know the meaning of.
127. 5:24I'm definitionally challenged!
128. 5:26Leave me alone!
129. 5:27Yin-Yang, you're safe.
130. 5:29YIN: Yes!
131. 5:29(Slap) YANG: No!
132. 5:31Apple, Tissues, one of you will be the first off the show.
133. 5:35Let's see who it is.
134. 5:36MePad, display the results.
135. 5:40What? Seriously guys, it was my condishawn, wasn't it?
136. 5:44(Projectile sneezing)
137. 5:46(Coughing)
138. 5:47It's just, snot fair!
139. 5:49(Knee slap)
140. 5:49Ah, thank god.
141. 5:51MEPHONE: Tissues, thanks for playing!
142. 5:53Your presence was...disturbing.
143. 5:56Anyway, into the portal.
144. 5:57The what?
145. 5:58(Cough)
146. 5:58MEPHONE: The rejection portal!
147. 5:59In, now!
148. 6:00But guys, my condishawn is really getting bad, guys!
149. 6:04Ahhh
150. 6:04Ahh-CHOO!
151. 6:05(Teleporting noise)
152. 6:11That portal is quite effective, sir!
153. 6:13I admire its user functionality.
154. 6:15MePad, we have a serious problem.
155. 6:17Marshmallow's in space!
156. 6:19We can't bring her back if she dies!
157. 6:21Wow, it's nice you care so much for her!
158. 6:23Workplaces function best with caring bosses behind them.
159. 6:26What? I don't care about her.
160. 6:28It's the lawsuits! I can't deal with anymore lawsuits!
161. 6:31Well, why don't you make the challenge to save her? That should solve the matter.
162. 6:35MePad, you're a genius.
163. 6:37Okay guys. This challenge is gonna be out of this world!
164. 6:40(Knee slap)
165. 6:41Ugh! Yeah, I think they get it, Cheesy.
166. 6:43Just making sure!
167. 6:45So yeah, it's an outer space challenge.
168. 6:47Build a rocketship, fly to Mars, rescue Marshmallow.
169. 6:50But since Marsh isn't present, someone from Team Grand Slams has to sit this one out.
170. 6:55How 'bout you, Knife? You're good at sitting out.
171. 6:58Sure, I guess.
172. 7:00We need materials to build the rocket!
173. 7:02Uhh...
174. 7:03Psst!
175. 7:04Phew!
176. 7:04Thanks MePad, you're a lifesaver.
177. 7:06(Rocket parts shifting about)
178. 7:08But what about the tools?
179. 7:10Uh, it's called a challenge, not a blueprint.
180. 7:13Anyway, if you don't do it in one hour, Marshmallow will die.
181. 7:17And you both will be up for elimination.
182. 7:19So you better hurry.
183. 7:20Don't worry everyone! I have all the tools we need!
184. 7:23(Suitcase opens)
185. 7:23Wow! This should make this challenge a walk in the park!
186. 7:26A ballpark?
187. 7:27(Knee slap)
188. 7:28Hey! I think Test Tube can build our rocket!
189. 7:30What makes you think she's qualified to do that?
190. 7:33Uhh, because test tubes tend to be used for scientific purposes, and rockets are sciency things.
191. 7:39Oh, so just because Test Tube's a test tube, that means she'll be good at science?
192. 7:43I don't appreciate judging people based on their appearance on my team.
193. 7:47What? That's not what I meant to do at all!
194. 7:49People like you make me sick.
195. 7:52Ugh, I'll just get some tools, then!
196. 7:54Hmm...
197. 7:55It says this spaceship runs on...
198. 7:57Ugh, lemons?
199. 7:59Really?
200. 8:00I've had enough of those!
201. 8:01Well, I'm great at climbing trees! C'mon!
202. 8:04(Nickel climbs)
203. 8:05(Rustling)
204. 8:06(Splat)
205. 8:07Ew, Nickel, what's this?
206. 8:08Oh, sorry, my chocolate bar melted again.
207. 8:11Anyway, here's some lemons!
208. 8:13(Thunking)
209. 8:14URGH!
210. 8:15Hey, can I borrow your hammer?
211. 8:17Well, o-our team needs to win, and if I give it to you, i-it lowers our chances.
212. 8:22What? How could you be so selfish?
213. 8:24I'm sorry, you're right!
214. 8:25I can't believe what I've become.
215. 8:27Take all the tools you need!
216. 8:28Thanks!
217. 8:29(Metal clanging)
218. 8:30There.
219. 8:30I got all this stuff.
220. 8:32(Metal clanging)
221. 8:33Now can we just ask Test Tube if she could build it?
222. 8:36Fine.
223. 8:36Test Tube, Paintbrush insists that you build the rocket due to the limitations of its prejudiced mind.
224. 8:42So, try your best, but I mean, you know, it's alright if you don't, you know, you slip up.
225. 8:45(Test Tube builds)
226. 8:49See, I was right!
227. 8:50This time, Paintbrush. This time.
228. 8:53(Facepalm)
229. 8:53So, anything I can help with?
230. 8:55Don't you know, Balloon?
231. 8:56You're not really "pop-ular."
232. 8:58(Knee slap)
233. 8:59Look, I know I was a bit bossy, but i wasn't evil or anything!
234. 9:03Just give me a chance!
235. 9:04Of course you can help us!
236. 9:06(Metal creaking)
237. 9:08There!
238. 9:09I think it's complete, guys!
239. 9:10Wow, you actually helped. Shocker.
240. 9:13HEY!
241. 9:14Quick, a half-hour's gone by! Let's get this thing in the air!
242. 9:18There's a three-person maximum capacity though.
243. 9:20I'll do it!
244. 9:21*typing*
245. 9:22Uh, what are you doing? (Typing)
246. 9:24Ah-I'm observing every physical feature about you to p-put on my blog.
247. 9:27Um, that's a little weird.
248. 9:30Anyway, aren't you supposed to be helping, not watching?
249. 9:33Oh! I forgot! I'm just so used to watching and, not competing, you know?
250. 9:37Okay okay, save the monologue for the interviews.
251. 9:40Jeez, just get in the rocket.
252. 9:41(Kick) (Clang)
253. 9:42Yin-Yang, you go too.
254. 9:43YIN: Yaaaaaaay!
255. 9:45YANG: NO! I will not with such losers!
256. 9:49(Slap)
257. 9:50AAA!
258. 9:51We need another volunteer.
259. 9:53Can I go?
260. 9:54So you can hack our rocket? No way.
261. 9:56Oh come on!
262. 9:58Baseball, Balloon wants to redeem himself, just give him a chance! Please!
263. 10:02Uh, OK, why not.
264. 10:04(Shouted) I'll go too!
265. 10:06Ow! You can if you never do that again.
266. 10:08(Button clicking) Sorry.
267. 10:10We need a third volunteer.
268. 10:11I'll do anything to save her! As my new friend, I will be there for her!
269. 10:16What!? I clearly missed something. Anyway, go.
270. 10:24Ugh! they're flying so slow.
271. 10:26It's just a perspective. It appears now they're moving at-
272. 10:29Shut up! You're such a nerd! Where's Knife, he's the only cool person here.
273. 10:35Dora, you are my only true friend. Nobody else understands me.
274. 10:41(Spanish talking)
275. 10:43Oh... well... well that's... interesting.
276. 10:46What!? Who's there!?
277. 10:48(Camera click)
278. 10:49Hey Knife! Look at this "Awesome" picture! Wait 'till everyone sees it.
279. 10:54Wait! No! Don't show anyone that! Please! Please stop! I'll do anything!
280. 11:01Anything?
281. 11:01Yeah...?
282. 11:02If you do everything I say for the rest of the competition, I will show no one this picture.
283. 11:07However, if you don't, let's just say, "No está bien" (Spanish for "Not well.") Do we have a deal?
284. 11:15*Sigh* Sí Señor. (Spanish for "Yes Sir.")
285. 11:21Hello? (Echoes)
286. 11:24Is anybody there? (Echoes)
287. 11:27Oh... Great! Just great!
288. 11:31Now I'm all alone... (Gasp)
289. 11:33Just like Apple was! Yikes! I don't like feeling so guilty!
290. 11:40AAAAA! ALIENS!
291. 11:43(Sigh) What a relief!
292. 11:45Hey Marshmallow, I found you! good thing you aren't dead!
293. 11:48Gee, thanks.
294. 11:49YEAH! (Echoes)
295. 11:52Whoa... the gravity is really weird here...
296. 11:56Quick, let's go back!
297. 12:02Guys look! Marshmallow turned into an egg! Noooo! This is awful!
298. 12:08Yin: Oh no, We're too late! Yang: I'm so... glad! Hahaha!
299. 12:13An egg! I must update the fan blog! But there's no service up here, aww.
300. 12:19I'll take the egg, maybe we can bring her back, I hope.
301. 12:22I'm sorry Marshmallow; I wish it didn't have to be this way.
302. 12:28Yay I'm back! Good thing to know I'm not dead in the vacuum of space!
303. 12:32Well at least you're back here safe and sound!
304. 12:35Yup! No lawsuits today! ...I mean, yay, you're healthy, woo-hoo!
305. 12:41You mean this egg ISN'T Marshmallow?
306. 12:43It ISN'T!?
307. 12:44Marshmallow! You're OK, I'm so glad!
308. 12:47Me too!
309. 12:48(Slap) And nobody cares.
310. 12:50But here's what does matter. You guys are up for elimination because that egg isn't Marshmallow.
311. 12:56Wait a minute, where'd you get the egg from anyway?
312. 12:58Eh, you know what? I don't wanna know. I've had enough drama for today.
313. 13:03But, bringing a potential lifeform from a distant planet is highly dangerous.
314. 13:07Boring. I'm keeping it. It'll remind me that wherever I am, I can always have someone to be there for me, in my lonely hours.
315. 13:14That's really pathetic.
316. 13:16(Sigh) Yeah...
317. 13:18Sir, Sir, I got your wires, you have no idea what I went through to get these!
318. 13:24Toilet! Those are green wires! I wanted red ones! Go get me the right ones; Ugh, you never listen.
319. 13:31Oh, sure thing Mr. Phone!
320. 13:33Anyway, team Bright Lights is up for elimination again.
321. 13:36So viewers, vote for a Dull Light to be eliminated.
322. 13:38You know, because they aren't so bright.
323. 13:42Ooh! Ooh!
324. 13:44(Slow knee slap)
325. 13:46Vote on Inanimate Insanity.com! Simply click on the vote button of the contestant you want to be eliminated. Voting ends May 8th.
326. 13:57(Outro)