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LOVE YOURSELF ENOUGH TO LET THEM GO ON SELF-WORTH | Alan Watts Motivation Speech — Transcript

by Alan watts motivat · 4,623 words · 744 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

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0:00There comes a moment in life when you
0:02have to ask yourself a difficult
0:03question. Am I holding on because this
0:06person truly belongs in my life or am I
0:09holding on because I am afraid of
0:10letting them go? That question can
0:13change everything. Because sometimes we
0:15don't hold on to people because they are
0:17good for us. We hold on because we
0:20remember who they used to be. We
0:22remember the conversations, the
0:24laughter, the promises, the [music]
0:25moments when everything felt perfect. We
0:28remember how they made us feel in the
0:29beginning [music] and we keep hoping
0:31that somehow if we wait long enough, try
0:34hard enough, understand them enough or
0:36love them enough, they will become
0:38[music] that person again. But you
0:40cannot build your future around
0:41someone's potential while ignoring their
0:43reality. And this is where selfworth
0:46begins. [music] Selfworth is not about
0:48believing that you are better than
0:50everyone else. It is not arrogance.
0:53[music] It is not thinking that you
0:55never make mistakes. It is simply
0:57understanding that you have value and
0:59that value does not disappear because
1:01someone failed to recognize it. [music]
1:03There will be people who don't
1:05appreciate you. There will be people who
1:07misunderstand you. [music] There will be
1:09people who take your kindness for
1:11granted. There will be people who only
1:13realize your importance after you
1:15[music] stop giving them unlimited
1:17access to you. And one of the hardest
1:19lessons you will ever learn is that you
1:21cannot convince someone to value you.
1:24You can explain yourself a h 100 times.
1:26[music] You can give more. You can
1:28forgive repeatedly. You can be patient.
1:31You can become more understanding.
1:33[music]
1:33You can make excuses for their behavior.
1:36You can keep telling yourself that they
1:38are going through a difficult time. But
1:40eventually [music] you have to look at
1:42what is actually happening instead of
1:44what you wish was happening. [music]
1:46Because love should never require you to
1:48continuously prove that you deserve to
1:50be treated well. You should not have to
1:53beg someone to listen to you. You should
1:56not have to constantly chase someone's
1:58attention. [music]
1:59You should not have to wonder every day
2:00whether you matter to them. You should
2:03not have to shrink yourself [music] just
2:05to keep someone comfortable. And you
2:07should never believe that losing someone
2:09[music] means losing your worth. Their
2:12decision to leave does not define your
2:14value. Their lack of appreciation does
2:16not define your value. Their inability
2:19to love you in the way you need does not
2:21define your value. Sometimes people walk
2:23away because they are not capable of
2:25giving what you need. Sometimes
2:27relationships change. Sometimes people
2:30grow in different directions. Sometimes
2:32someone simply chooses a different path.
2:34[music] It hurts. Of course it hurts.
2:37Letting go is not easy when your heart
2:39is still attached. [music] But pain does
2:41not always mean you are making the wrong
2:43decision. Sometimes pain is simply the
2:46price of accepting reality. Think about
2:48how often people stay in situations
2:50[music]
2:51that have already ended emotionally.
2:53They keep waiting for an apology. They
2:55keep waiting for an explanation. They
2:58keep waiting for the other person to
3:00suddenly wake up and realize what they
3:02lost. And while they [music] are
3:03waiting, their own life is passing by.
3:06Their confidence becomes weaker. Their
3:08peace disappears. their attention
3:11becomes completely focused on someone's
3:13one who is no longer giving the same
3:15attention in return. [music] That is not
3:17love anymore. That is attachment mixed
3:19with hope. And there is a difference.
3:22Hope can be beautiful when it inspires
3:24you to grow. But hope becomes [music]
3:26harmful when it keeps you trapped in
3:28something that repeatedly shows you it
3:30is not working. You have to learn to
3:33recognize the difference between
3:34fighting for something meaningful and
3:37fighting [music] against reality. If
3:38someone makes a mistake and takes
3:40responsibility, that is one thing.
3:42[music] If someone hurts you, recognizes
3:45it, genuinely changes, and consistently
3:47treats you with respect, that is
3:49something you can evaluate. But if
3:52someone repeatedly [music] shows you
3:53that they do not value your presence,
3:56you cannot keep turning their behavior
3:58into a challenge that you have to
3:59overcome. [music]
4:01You are not supposed to win someone's
4:02love. You are not supposed to compete
4:04for basic respect.
4:06>> [music]
4:06>> You are not supposed to audition for a
4:08permanent place in someone's life. The
4:10moment you understand this, something
4:12changes inside you. You stop asking,
4:15"What can I do to make them stay?" And
4:17you begin asking, "Why [music] am I
4:19willing to abandon myself just to make
4:21someone stay?" That is a powerful
4:23question because sometimes the person
4:26you need to stop chasing [music] is not
4:28someone else. Sometimes it is the
4:30version of yourself that believes you
4:31have to earn love.
4:33>> [music]
4:33>> Maybe somewhere along the way you
4:35learned that being useful makes you
4:37valuable. [music] Maybe you learned that
4:39being endlessly available makes people
4:41stay. Maybe you learned that if you
4:43never complain, never say no, and always
4:46put everyone else first, people will
4:48appreciate you. But that is not how
4:51healthy relationships work. Your worth
4:53is not measured by how much you can
4:55[music] tolerate. Your kindness should
4:57not become an invitation for people to
4:59disregard your boundaries. Your
5:01forgiveness should not mean you have to
5:03accept the same behavior forever. And
5:06your love [music] for someone should
5:08never require hatred toward yourself.
5:10There is a strange thing that happens
5:12when you care deeply about someone.
5:14[music] You can become so focused on
5:16protecting the relationship that you
5:17forget to protect yourself. You start
5:20saying it's okay when it isn't. You say
5:23I understand when you are actually hurt.
5:26[music] You say maybe they didn't mean
5:28it. Even when the same thing keeps
5:30happening, you say, "I'll give them
5:32another chance." [music]
5:33Even though you have already given them
5:35many, and eventually you become [music]
5:38exhausted, not because you didn't love
5:40enough, but because you were trying to
5:42carry a relationship by yourself. A
5:44relationship [music] cannot survive on
5:46one person's effort. Conction requires
5:49mutual care. Respect requires
5:51participation from both sides. Trust
5:54requires consistency. [music]
5:56And if you are the only person trying to
5:57keep everything together, eventually you
5:59have to ask yourself whether you are
6:01preserving a relationship or simply
6:03postponing its ending. That realization
6:07can be painful. [music] But sometimes
6:09the most loving thing you can do for
6:10yourself is stop forcing what no longer
6:13feels mutual. [music] Let them go not
6:16because they are necessarily a terrible
6:17person. Not because you have to become
6:20bitter. [music] Not because you need to
6:22prove a point. Let them go because you
6:24are finally willing to choose your own
6:26peace. And choosing yourself does not
6:29[music] mean you stop caring. You can
6:31care about someone and still create
6:33distance. You [music] can forgive
6:34someone and still move forward. You can
6:37remember beautiful moments without
6:39returning to a situation that no longer
6:41serves you. You can wish someone well
6:44without keeping them in your life. That
6:46is maturity. You don't have to turn
6:48every ending into a war. Some endings
6:51simply need acceptance. There are people
6:53who are meant to teach you something,
6:55not stay with you forever. There are
6:58connections that exist for a season.
7:00There are relationships [music] that
7:01reveal parts of you that you needed to
7:03discover. And when their chapter ends,
7:06your responsibility is not to keep
7:08rereading the same page, [music] hoping
7:10the ending will change. Your
7:12responsibility is to continue the story.
7:15The hardest part is often not letting
7:16the person go. It is letting go of the
7:19fantasy. The fantasy that one day they
7:22will become exactly who you need them to
7:23be. [music]
7:24The fantasy that one conversation will
7:26fix everything. The fantasy that if you
7:29just explain yourself correctly, they
7:31will finally understand. [music] The
7:33fantasy that the past can somehow return
7:35exactly as it was. But life does not
7:37work that way. People [music] change,
7:40circumstances change, feelings change,
7:43and sometimes the healthiest thing
7:44[music] you can do is stop demanding
7:46that reality become your memory. Your
7:49memories can be real and still be over.
7:51The good moments can have mattered and
7:53still belong in the past. [music] You
7:55don't have to pretend something was
7:56meaningless simply because it ended. You
7:59can say, "That mattered to me. I learned
8:01from it. I appreciated what was
8:03beautiful [music] about it. And now I am
8:06ready to move forward." That is
8:08selfrespect. And self-respect is often
8:10[music] quieter than people imagine. It
8:12is not dramatic. It does not always
8:14announce itself. Sometimes self-respect
8:17is simply not sending the message.
8:19[music]
8:19Sometimes it is not chasing an
8:21explanation. Sometimes it is accepting
8:23that you have already received the
8:25answer through someone's actions.
8:27Sometimes it is going to sleep without
8:30checking whether they reached out.
8:32Sometimes it is putting your attention
8:34back on your own life, your goals, your
8:37friendships, your [music] family, your
8:39education, your creativity, your future,
8:42your peace. Because every moment you
8:45spend obsessing over whether someone
8:47else values you is a moment, you are not
8:49investing in yourself. And you deserve
8:51your own attention, too. [music]
8:53You deserve to become someone you are
8:55proud of. You deserve to develop your
8:58abilities. You deserve to build a life
9:00that does not depend on another person's
9:02approval. You deserve to wake up and
9:05feel excited about your own future. The
9:08world will constantly give you reasons
9:10to doubt yourself. There will always be
9:12someone who doesn't understand your
9:14personality, [music] someone who doesn't
9:16appreciate your efforts, someone who
9:18thinks you are not enough. But you
9:21cannot hand every person the authority
9:23to define you. Imagine giving every
9:25person you meet a pen and allowing
9:27[music] them to write the definition of
9:29who you are. One person would write that
9:32you are too quiet. Another would say you
9:34are too emotional. Another would say you
9:36care [music] too much. Another would say
9:39you don't care enough. Another would say
9:41you are difficult. Another would say you
9:43are not ambitious. Another would say you
9:46are too ambitious. If you believe all of
9:48them, who are you? That is why your
9:51sense of worth must come from something
9:53deeper than other people's opinions.
9:55Know yourself. [music]
9:56Know your values. Know your boundaries.
10:00Know what [music] kind of person you
10:01want to become. And then stop
10:03negotiating those things every time
10:05someone threatens to leave. Because if
10:07someone can only stay when you betray
10:09yourself, [music] then their presence is
10:11costing you too much. You do not have to
10:13become cold. You do not have to stop
10:16loving people. You do not have to stop
10:18trusting everyone. You simply need to
10:21stop confusing self-sacrifice with
10:23selfworth. There is a difference between
10:25being there for someone [music] and
10:27losing yourself for them. There is a
10:29difference between compromise and
10:31self-abandonment. There is a [music]
10:33difference between patience and
10:35endlessly accepting disrespect. Learn
10:38that difference [music] because the
10:40world does not need another person who
10:42spends their entire life trying to prove
10:44they are worthy. [music] It needs people
10:46who understand their value and live from
10:49that understanding. And maybe today you
10:51need to hear this. You're allowed to let
10:53[music] go. You're allowed to stop
10:55chasing. You're allowed to stop
10:57explaining. You're allowed to stop
10:59waiting. [music] You're allowed to move
11:01forward.
11:02Even if the other person never gives you
11:04the closure you wanted, closure does not
11:06always come from them. [music]
11:08Sometimes closure comes from you
11:10deciding that you have seen enough,
11:12[music] you have learned enough, you
11:14have endured enough, and you are ready
11:16for something healthier. Do not wait
11:18until you completely lose yourself
11:20before you decide to choose [music]
11:21yourself. Do not wait until your
11:24confidence disappears.
11:26Do not wait until you forget who you
11:27were before the relationship. Choose
11:29yourself while you still recognize
11:31yourself. And remember, letting someone
11:34go does not mean you lost. Sometimes
11:36letting go is the moment you finally win
11:39back the part of yourself that you gave
11:41away trying to keep someone else. You
11:44don't need to convince anyone of [music]
11:45your worth. You don't need to chase
11:47someone into recognizing what they have
11:50in front of them. The people who truly
11:52belong in your life will not require you
11:54to constantly destroy your peace to keep
11:56their attention. And when someone
11:59chooses to leave, let their decision be
12:01theirs. [music] You don't have to follow
12:03them. You don't have to beg. You don't
12:05have to collapse. You can grieve. You
12:08can learn. You can heal. [music] And
12:10then you can keep walking because your
12:11life is bigger than one person. Your
12:14future is bigger [music] than one
12:16relationship. Your identity is bigger
12:18than someone's opinion of you. And your
12:20worth was never waiting in [music]
12:22someone else's hands. It was within you
12:24all along. So love yourself enough to
12:27stop begging for what should be freely
12:29given. [music] Love yourself enough to
12:31stop chasing what continuously runs
12:33away. Lo yourself enough to recognize
12:36when your heart is asking you to release
12:38something your fear is telling you to
12:40hold. And when the time comes, open your
12:42hands. Let [music] them go. Not with
12:45hatred, not with revenge, not with
12:47bitterness, but with peace. Because
12:50sometimes the greatest proof that you
12:52finally understand your worth is not
12:54making someone stay. It is being strong
12:56[music] enough to walk forward when they
12:58choose not to. There comes a point in
13:00life when letting go stops being about
13:03losing someone [music] and starts being
13:04about finding yourself again. For a long
13:07time, you may believe that holding on is
13:09a sign of strength. You tell yourself
13:12that strong people don't give up. They
13:14stay. They wait. They forgive. [music]
13:16They keep trying. They keep believing.
13:19And sometimes that is true. [music] Some
13:21things are worth fighting for. But there
13:23is another kind of strength that people
13:25rarely talk about. The strength to
13:27release what you cannot change. The
13:29strength to accept that a chapter has
13:31ended. The strength to stop chasing
13:33someone who [music] has already chosen
13:35distance. And most importantly, the
13:38strength to return to yourself. Because
13:40sometimes [music]
13:42when you become deeply attached to
13:43another person, you slowly begin to lose
13:45[music] touch with who you are. Your
13:48thoughts start revolving around them.
13:50Your mood depends on how they treat you.
13:52[music]
13:53Your confidence depends on whether they
13:55approve of you. Your peace depends on
13:57whether they respond. [music] Your
13:59happiness depends on whether they stay.
14:01And without realizing it, you have
14:03handed someone else the responsibility
14:05for your emotional world. That is when
14:08you need to pause [music]
14:09because no person should become the
14:11entire definition of your life. [music]
14:13You had an identity before they entered
14:15your world. You had dreams. You had
14:18interests. You had goals. You had
14:20moments when you laughed without
14:22thinking about them. You had [music]
14:24plans for your future. You had a life.
14:26And if a relationship causes you to
14:28completely forget that person you were,
14:31then something needs to change. Not
14:33because caring about someone is wrong.
14:35Caring is beautiful. Loving people is
14:38beautiful. Being loyal is beautiful. But
14:41there is a difference between loving
14:43someone and losing yourself inside the
14:45relationship.
14:46You can love someone and still choose
14:48yourself. [music]
14:49You can miss someone and still move
14:51forward. You can appreciate what they
14:53meant to you and still [music] accept
14:55that they are no longer part of your
14:56future. That is not weakness. That is
14:59emotional maturity. Sometimes we think
15:02moving forward means forgetting. [music]
15:04It doesn't. Moving forward means
15:06remembering without allowing the memory
15:08to control your life. You may still
15:11[music] think about the conversations.
15:13You may still remember the good moments.
15:15You may still wonder how things [music]
15:17could have been different. That is
15:19human. But eventually you have to stop
15:21living inside the question, what if?
15:24What if they changed? What if they
15:26[music] came back? What if they finally
15:28understood? What if things became like
15:30they used to be? What if you gave them
15:32one more chance? Those questions can
15:35keep you trapped for years [music]
15:36because there will always be another
15:38what if. At some point, you need to
15:40replace what if with what now? What now?
15:43Now I rebuild. Now I focus on myself.
15:45[music] Now I learn. Now I grow. Now I
15:48protect my peace. Now I become the
15:51person I was meant to become. That
15:53question can completely change your
15:55direction because the past is not asking
15:57you to live there. It is asking you to
15:59learn from it. Maybe the experience
16:02taught you that you need stronger
16:03boundaries. Maybe it taught you that you
16:06deserve consistency. [music] Maybe it
16:08taught you not to ignore your instincts.
16:11Maybe it taught you that you cannot
16:12[music] make someone care. Maybe it
16:14taught you that love without respect
16:16eventually becomes exhausting. Take the
16:18lesson. Leave the pain behind. You
16:21[music] don't have to carry every
16:23painful experience into your future.
16:25There is a difference between
16:26remembering something and [music]
16:27carrying it. You can remember what
16:30happened without allowing it to
16:32determine [music] what happens next. And
16:34this is where self-worth becomes
16:36powerful. Selfworth means understanding
16:38[music]
16:39that your future deserves your attention
16:41more than your past deserves your
16:43obsession. [music]
16:45Think about that. Your future is still
16:47unwritten. There are people you haven't
16:49met. There are opportunities you haven't
16:51discovered. [music]
16:52There are places you haven't seen. There
16:55are skills you haven't developed. There
16:57are dreams you haven't pursued. There
17:00are versions of yourself you haven't
17:01become yet. [music]
17:03Why would you spend your entire life
17:05standing at the door of something that
17:06has already closed? [music] Maybe you
17:09are waiting for someone to come back.
17:11Maybe you are waiting for an apology.
17:13Maybe you are waiting for an
17:14explanation. Maybe you are waiting for
17:17them to realize what they lost. But what
17:19if your life isn't supposed to begin
17:21when they return? What if your life
17:24begins when you stop waiting? That is
17:26the shift. Stop making your future
17:28dependent on someone else's decision.
17:31Your life belongs to you. Your growth
17:33belongs to you. Your peace belongs to
17:35you. Your next chapter belongs to you.
17:38And you don't need permission from the
17:40person who hurt you to move forward. You
17:43don't need their approval to become
17:44stronger. You don't need their apology
17:47to start healing emotionally.
17:49You don't need their understanding to
17:51understand [music] yourself. Sometimes
17:53you have to give yourself the closure
17:55you were hoping someone else would give
17:56you. [music]
17:57You have to say, "I may never receive
18:00the explanation I wanted, but I can
18:02still choose peace." That is powerful
18:05because waiting for closure can become
18:07another form of attachment. [music] You
18:09keep thinking, "Once they explain, I'll
18:11finally move on. But what if they never
18:14explain? What if they never apologize?
18:17What if they never understand your side?
18:19[music] Are you going to keep your life
18:20paused forever?" No. At some point, you
18:24have to give yourself permission to
18:25move. Not because everything makes
18:28sense, but because you deserve peace
18:30even when everything doesn't make sense.
18:32And when you begin returning to
18:33yourself, start small. Return to your
18:36routines. [music] Return to your goals.
18:38Return to the things that make you feel
18:40alive. Spend time with people who
18:42genuinely care about you. Learn
18:45something new. Ride doc. [music]
18:47Exercise in a healthy way. Work on your
18:49skills. Focus on your education and
18:52future. [music] Give your mind something
18:54meaningful to build instead of endlessly
18:56replaying what went wrong. [music]
18:58Because healing isn't simply about
19:00removing someone from your life. It is
19:02about rebuilding a life that feels
19:04meaningful without them. That is the
19:06part people often miss. [music] You
19:08don't heal simply by saying, "I'm over
19:10them." You heal by becoming more
19:13connected to yourself. [music] You begin
19:15discovering what you like, what you
19:17value, what you want, what you will no
19:19longer accept, what kind of person you
19:21want to become. And slowly, the space
19:24that once belonged entirely to another
19:27person begins filling with your own
19:28life. Your dreams become louder than
19:31your memories. Your future becomes more
19:33exciting than your past. Your peace
19:36becomes more important than their
19:38attention. And one [music] day, you
19:39realize something. You didn't lose
19:41yourself forever. You were simply
19:44distracted from yourself for a while and
19:46now you're coming home. Coming home to
19:48your own mind. [music] Coming home to
19:50your own values. Coming home to your own
19:53dreams. Coming home to the person you
19:55were before you started [music]
19:56questioning whether you were enough
19:58because you were always enough. You may
20:01have made mistakes.
20:03You may have trusted the wrong person.
20:05[music] You may have stayed too long.
20:07You may have ignored warning signs. But
20:10mistakes do not erase your worth. They
20:12teach you. Do not turn your mistakes
20:14into a permanent identity. You made a
20:17choice with the understanding you had at
20:19that time. [music] Now you have more
20:20understanding. Use it. Grow from it. And
20:24don't punish yourself forever for not
20:26knowing what you know today. Self
20:28forgiveness is part of selfworth. You
20:30have to forgive yourself for the times
20:32you accepted less. Forgive yourself for
20:34the times you chased. Forgive yourself
20:37for the times you ignored your own
20:39needs. Forgive yourself for believing
20:42promises that were never fulfilled.
20:44Forgive yourself for staying [music]
20:46when you were afraid to leave. You were
20:48learning. You were human. And now you
20:50know better. Knowing better means you
20:53can choose differently. You don't have
20:55to repeat the same pattern just because
20:57it feels familiar. Sometimes familiarity
21:00feels safer than change. But familiar
21:02does not always mean healthy. A
21:05situation can be familiar and still be
21:07damaging to your peace. A person can be
21:09familiar and still not belong in your
21:11future. And walking away from
21:14familiarity can be frightening, but
21:16courage is not the absence of fear.
21:19Courage is choosing what is right for
21:20you. Even while fear is present, you
21:23might feel lonely after letting someone
21:25go. But loneliness does not mean you
21:27made the wrong choice. Sometimes
21:29loneliness is simply the empty space
21:31between an old life and a new one. Give
21:34yourself time. Don't rush to fill that
21:36space with another person. Learn to be
21:38comfortable with yourself. Learn to
21:41enjoy your own company. Learn that being
21:43alone and being abandoned are not the
21:45same thing. Being alone can become an
21:48opportunity to discover yourself.
21:50[music] You can sit with your thoughts.
21:52You can understand your emotions. You
21:54can identify what you truly want. You
21:57can become your own source of
21:58encouragement. And when you become
22:01comfortable with yourself, you stop
22:02accepting relationships simply because
22:05you are afraid of being alone. That
22:07changes everything. You stop choosing
22:10people because they are available. You
22:12start choosing people because the
22:13connection is healthy. [music] You stop
22:15asking will they choose me? You start
22:18asking is this relationship good for
22:20both of us? You stop thinking how do I
22:23[music] keep them? You start thinking
22:25can we respect each other? That is
22:27growth. And when you grow, your
22:29standards change. Not unrealistic
22:31standards, [music] healthy standards,
22:33respect, honesty, consistency, kenness,
22:36mutual [music] effort, healthy
22:38communication. Those are not too much to
22:40ask. You don't have to accept disrespect
22:43[music] simply because you fear losing
22:45someone. You don't have to remain in a
22:47connection that constantly [music]
22:48destroys your peace just because you
22:51once shared beautiful memories.
22:53Beautiful memories are not contracts.
22:55[music] The past does not obligate you
22:57to remain in the present. And sometimes
23:00the most respectful thing you can do is
23:02release each other. No drama, no
23:04revenge, [music]
23:05no attempt to make them jealous. No need
23:07to prove that you're doing better, just
23:09peace. Let them live their life. You
23:12live yours. And don't turn healing into
23:14a competition. You don't need to show
23:17anyone that you are happier. [music] You
23:19don't need to become successful just so
23:21someone regrets leaving. Build yourself
23:24because you deserve a better life,
23:26[music] not because you want someone
23:27else to notice. That distinction
23:30matters. If your entire transformation
23:32is designed to make another person
23:33regret losing you, then they [music]
23:35still control you. True freedom comes
23:38when their reaction no longer matters.
23:40[music] You don't need them to regret
23:42leaving. You don't need them to come
23:44back. You don't need them to watch your
23:46success. You don't need them to admit
23:48they were wrong. You simply need to
23:51become at peace with [music] yourself.
23:53That is the victory. The real victory is
23:56waking up one morning and realizing you
23:58no longer need an answer from someone
24:00who couldn't give it to you. The real
24:02victory is being able to remember
24:04without feeling destroyed. The victory
24:07is that your happiness [music]
24:09doesn't depend on one person's presence.
24:12The real victory is knowing that you can
24:14love deeply without abandoning yourself.
24:17And when [music] you reach that place,
24:18something beautiful happens. You stop
24:21fearing endings. You understand that
24:23every ending is not a punishment.
24:25[music] Some endings are redirections.
24:27Some endings create space. Some endings
24:30teach you what you will never accept
24:32again. Some endings introduce you to a
24:34stronger version of yourself. So if
24:36someone is no longer meant to walk
24:38beside you, don't spend your entire life
24:40trying to drag them into your future.
24:42Let them go and then turn around. Look
24:46at yourself. Look at the life waiting
24:47for you. Look at the possibilities you
24:50ignored while you were focused on
24:52someone else. Look at your dreams. Look
24:55at your potential. Look at the person
24:57you can become. There is still so much
24:59ahead of you. Don't let one ending
25:01convince you that your story is over.
25:03[music]
25:04It isn't. Sometimes your story becomes
25:07more meaningful after the person you
25:08thought would be there is [music] gone
25:10because now you have the opportunity to
25:12write the next chapter yourself. And
25:14this time, write it with selfrespect.
25:17[music] Pri it with boundaries. Pri it
25:19with courage. Pri it with patience. Pri
25:21it with peace. Don't build your life
25:23around who stays. Build your life around
25:26who you are becoming. And remember this.
25:29You are not losing yourself by letting
25:31someone go. You are finding [music]
25:33yourself. You are finding your voice
25:35again. You are finding your confidence
25:38again. You are finding your peace again.
25:40You are finding your direction again.
25:42And perhaps most importantly, you are
25:45learning that you can stand on your own
25:46without becoming hard, bitter, or closed
25:49off. You can remain kind without being
25:52easy to take advantage of. You can
25:54remain loving without chasing. You can
25:56remain hopeful without waiting for
25:58someone who has already chosen another
26:00path. You can forgive without returning.
26:04You can remember without going backward.
26:06[music] You can care without losing
26:07yourself. That is what self-worth looks
26:10like. It is not saying I don't need
26:12anyone. It is saying I value myself
26:15enough not to disappear just because
26:17someone [music] leaves. So if you are
26:19standing at the edge of an ending right
26:21now, don't be afraid of what comes next.
26:23[music] You may not know exactly where
26:25the road leads. You don't need to take
26:28the next step, then another. Give
26:30yourself permission to rebuild slowly.
26:33Give yourself permission to have good
26:35days and difficult days. Give yourself
26:37permission to miss what was while still
26:40choosing what comes next.

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