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Let the great witch Circe guide you to an inner world of power, magic and transformative self-trust — Transcript

by Betwixt: The Story of You · 3,689 words · 593 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

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0:00There are some things you know before
0:02you can explain them.
0:03Instincts about people, a decision
0:05you're making, or a need left wanting.
0:08And then there's that other voice that
0:09comes just after that kind of knowing,
0:12the reasonable sounding one that
0:13pooh-poohs the initial thought, or
0:15worse, demands proof.
0:17Today, we're meeting the witch who can
0:19teach us how to honor the former, and
0:21who turns the latter into pigs.
0:23My name is Hazel Gale. I'm a therapist,
0:25author, and co-creator of the fantasy
0:26mental health app Betwixt. And this is
0:29the first episode in a series on the
0:30witch as archetype and the magic that
0:33lives inside of you.
0:34Heads up, there are spoilers coming if
0:36you can say such a thing about the myth
0:38of Circe, but also for the wonderful
0:40Madeline Miller retelling of her story.
0:42And you should know that this video
0:44contains a short but evocative
0:45description of violence against a woman.
0:48In terms of archetypal psychology, the
0:50witch is the undomesticated feminine
0:52force within, or what Clarissa Pinkola
0:54Estés calls the wild woman archetype.
0:57She lives inside of all of us,
0:58regardless of our gender, and she
1:00refuses to be tamed. Witch wisdom exists
1:02beneath language and logic and lives
1:04far, far away from our carefully
1:06constructed public-facing selves.
1:09This is why in story she resides in a
1:10cabin at the edge of the woods, or in
1:12some similarly isolated threshold place
1:15where her particular power finds its
1:17roots.
1:18She cannot and will not integrate into
1:20the familiar, social, structured world
1:22because the witch is, in essence, an
1:24archetype of liminality.
1:26She exists in the space between the seen
1:28and the unseen,
1:30the living and the dead, the known and
1:32the unknowable, and between what the
1:33world wants us to believe and what is
1:35actually true.
1:37In spite of millennia of literal
1:39persecution, the witch has survived.
1:41This series honors her many faces and
1:43varied powers. In each episode, we'll
1:45meet a different expression, starting
1:47with the story of a goddess who is sent
1:49away to live alone because her knowledge
1:50is considered too powerful and too
1:52dangerous. But what she knows, you also
1:55I don't
1:55This is how to remember.
1:57From her very first breath, Circe is
1:59between worlds.
2:01The daughter of Helios, the god of the
2:02sun, and Perse, an Oceanid water nymph,
2:06she is neither fully goddess, she has no
2:08obvious power, no seat on Mount Olympus,
2:10nor fully mortal. She doesn't age or
2:12weaken, she doesn't die.
2:14Circe's family is cold and unwelcoming.
2:17Her father is a Titan and therefore of a
2:19different order to his nymph wife and
2:21children. Her brother Aeëtes is
2:23calculating and ambitious. Her sister
2:25Pasiphaë is renowned for her
2:27ruthlessness and for becoming the mother
2:29of the monster that is the Minotaur.
2:31Neither the most beautiful or most
2:32powerful, nor most valued, Circe watches
2:35her family from the sidelines. She
2:37observes until one day
2:40this is not enough.
2:42Consumed by jealousy and the pain of
2:43unrequited love, Circe transforms a
2:46fellow nymph named Scylla into a
2:48terrible six-headed sea monster.
2:51And the gods do not forgive her for
2:52this. As punishment, Helios carries her
2:55across the world in his chariot and
2:57drops her on an empty island named
2:59Aeaea,
3:00where she is to live out her immortal
3:01life alone.
3:03Many tales of powerful women are stories
3:05about what they lose more than anything
3:07else. Circe's is one of these.
3:09She loses everything, family,
3:11connection, belonging, and the
3:13possibility of being accepted by others.
3:15In real life, even now, the inner witch
3:18is still largely in exile. Pinkola Estés
3:21writes about how women, though I'd argue
3:22it's women, men, and everyone else, have
3:24been cut off from our wild instinctual
3:27power as a result of the pressure we're
3:29under to conform to what the world
3:30expects us to be.
3:32In Circe's story, we see this exile as a
3:35real external situation. But we also see
3:38the gift therein, because what she
3:40discovers in her solitude is the
3:41awakening of her natural, powerful self.
3:45On Aeaea, Circe begins to learn.
3:48She learns how to trust herself in the
3:49woods. She learns the names of the
3:51plants and what they're capable of. She
3:53makes mistakes, of course, and she
3:54learns from those, too. Crucially, this
3:57learning is self-initiated and
3:59self-governed, with no teacher and no
4:01tradition to follow. She grows powerful
4:03by paying attention and by trusting the
4:06part of herself that knows things before
4:08she knows she knows them. Intuition,
4:11instinct, and her authentic felt sense.
4:14These are the things that bring Circe
4:15alive in her exile.
4:18Years pass before sailors begin to find
4:20her island. The most famous of these
4:22being Odysseus's men. They arrive lost
4:24and hungry, and Circe offers them a
4:26feast of food and wine. Then she
4:28transforms them all into pigs.
4:30Odysseus, having been intercepted by the
4:32god Hermes and given a magical plant
4:34named moly, so that he'll be protected
4:36against Circe's magic, escapes this
4:38fate. After some negotiations, Circe
4:41restores the sailors to their human
4:43forms, and she and Odysseus become
4:44lovers.
4:45She eventually bears his son, Telegonus.
4:48In Homer's Odyssey, Odysseus's men are
4:50described as cautious, respectful, and
4:52grateful to Circe for her initial
4:54hospitality. Later Greek and Roman
4:56philosophers, such as the Stoics,
4:57however, read the Odyssey allegorically
5:00and came to some different conclusions.
5:02They argued that Circe's island
5:03represents the temptation of physical
5:05pleasure. In their view, the men acted
5:07like beasts by giving in to the
5:09appetites of gluttony and lust, and
5:11their physical transformation simply
5:13mirrored their own lack of self-control.
5:15Whichever reading you favor is, of
5:16course, up to you. I fairly predictably
5:18prefer the latter, and therefore enjoy
5:20retellings like Madeline Miller's novel.
5:23In Miller's version, Circe welcomes the
5:24first sailors onto her island, happy to
5:27offer her bounty freely in exchange for
5:29real company. But, unaware of her
5:31divinity, when they realize that she is
5:33a woman on her own, they choose to take
5:35more than just food and wine from Circe.
5:38The captain holds her against the wall
5:39by her neck, crushing her windpipe and
5:42silencing her voice as he assaults her.
5:44Afterwards, when she drops to the floor,
5:47released and therefore able to speak
5:48again, she curses them all as an act of
5:50self-preservation as much as vengeance.
5:53If we ignore the fact that this throws
5:55some serious shade on the poor innocent
5:56pig, this is also an act of revelation.
5:59When Circe turns the beastly greedy men
6:02into swine, she is revealing the truth
6:04of things, which is exactly how
6:06intuition works. The conscious mind and
6:08ego are great at constructing stories
6:10and rationalizations, excuses in
6:13particular. But intuition simply sees
6:15what's there whether we like it or not.
6:17As such, it's impervious to criticism,
6:19argument, and gaslighting, which is
6:21precisely why it has been viewed as
6:23dangerous for as long as it has. You
6:25can't control the truth. You can only
6:27try to hide or quiet it. Circe needed to
6:30be free of the familiar world's stifling
6:32rules to reawaken this knowing for
6:35herself and to become tremendously
6:36powerful as a result.
6:39So, what is intuition and can we really
6:41trust it? The research on this is
6:43interesting and it says neither that
6:45intuition is the stuff of unreliable
6:46whimsy, nor that it is a faithful
6:49all-purpose means of getting to the
6:50truth. Rather, it shows that intuition
6:52is reliable under certain specifiable
6:55conditions. To understand these, we need
6:57to look at two contrasting researchers.
6:59Daniel Kahneman spent decades cataloging
7:01the failures of intuitive judgment,
7:03while Gary Klein spent his career
7:05documenting its successes. Eventually,
7:08they agreed to work together to see who
7:09was right and found that they both were.
7:12Their combined research showed that
7:13intuition is a skill that involves
7:15trained pattern recognition. And that
7:17for this skill to be reliable, two
7:19conditions need to be met. First, the
7:21situation at hand has to contain genuine
7:23patterns. That is, reliable cues that
7:26repeat. Second, you need to have had
7:28enough exposure to those patterns to
7:30have learned the cues well enough for
7:32your intuition to be on the money. The
7:34situations in which intuition is next to
7:36useless include things like stock
7:38picking, long-range forecasting, and
7:40predicting how well an interviewing job
7:42candidate will perform 2 years in the
7:44future. The domains where instinct is
7:46genuinely trained, however, are the more
7:48present and or human ones, such as
7:51feeling the wrongness in a situation you
7:53know particularly well,
7:54reading the emotions or intentions of
7:57the person sitting opposite you, sensing
7:59a change of vibe in a group, or knowing
8:01that something is off in a relationship.
8:03I think many of us at least sometimes
8:05trust our gut when it comes to specific
8:07circumstances that we know better than
8:09others. But feel less certain when it
8:12comes to people. Unless you've been
8:14living on a remote island, however,
8:15you've had a lifetime of exposure to
8:17people with constant feedback, much of
8:19it painful and therefore memorable. This
8:21means that you are, whether you believe
8:23it or not, an expert at people, at least
8:25the people you know anyway. Somewhat
8:27infuriatingly, the more human, everyday
8:29contexts of life tend to be where we're
8:31told to be rational and objective and
8:34less emotional about our judgment
8:35making. Meanwhile, gut trusting is
8:37applauded in exactly the arenas where
8:40the evidence says it fails, markets,
8:42gambling, and hunches about the future.
8:44[clears throat]
8:44In other words, we have it perfectly
8:46upside down. And I'm sure this has
8:48absolutely nothing to do with the fact
8:49that reading people and tending
8:51relationships have long been considered
8:52women's work, child rearing, home
8:54making, nursing, and caring professions.
8:57While stock markets, casinos, and the
8:59various professions that involve
9:00long-range forecasting are more
9:01male-dominated. Be that as it may, I'd
9:04say these findings are encouraging
9:06overall.
9:07Because the things that most of us
9:08actually want to be able to trust
9:09ourselves about other we probably can.
9:12Who we can open up to. When to leave a
9:14relationship, whether our friends or
9:16partners are happy, scared, too tired,
9:18etc., and whether something is right for
9:20us. When it comes to these things, we
9:22have spent our entire lives gathering
9:24data. And that means that our gut may be
9:26more reliable than the obvious or
9:27expected answer to our questions. The
9:29problems arise when our intuition is at
9:32odds with either other people's opinions
9:34or social norms and expectations,
9:36because we haven't been taught to trust
9:38it.
9:39When instinct and expectation pull in
9:41different directions, it's far too easy
9:43to be swayed by the ways of the outside
9:45world.
9:47In each of these videos, we're going to
9:48meet both a witch and her shadow. An
9:51often frightening example of what
9:52happens when which wisdom is repressed,
9:54ignored, or as in the case of today's
9:56shadow, domesticated. According to
9:59historians like Jacob Grimm, Perchta was
10:02originally an ancient pagan goddess of
10:04winter, the home, and women's crafts.
10:06When Christianity spread through the
10:08Alpine regions of Austria and Southern
10:10Germany, however, church officials
10:12stripped away her divine status. Over
10:14centuries, she devolved from a powerful
10:16dual-natured deity into a terrifying
10:18witch-like bogeyman used to frighten
10:20lazy children.
10:22Frau Perchta, aka the Christmas Witch or
10:25horribly the belly slitter,
10:27comes in the 12 nights between Christmas
10:29and Epiphany.
10:30She has two faces. One is bright and
10:32beautiful, associated with spinning, the
10:35hearth, and the giving of rewards to
10:36children who do their chores. The other
10:39is a truly terrible monster who seeks
10:41out the shirkers and opens them up to
10:43remove their organs before filling them
10:45with straw. So, in one way at least,
10:47Circe and Perchta are similar.
10:49If you step out of line, they will show
10:51you exactly what you're made of.
10:53But in other regards, not so much.
10:55Perchta is Circe's shadow because while
10:57they're both fearsome feminine forces,
10:59they meet very different fates.
11:02Largely because one is confined to the
11:03home, while the other is allowed to roam
11:05free on the island of Aiaia.
11:07Circe, exiled, discovers her wild
11:09knowing and uses it to become something
11:11extraordinary. Perchta, caged in
11:14domesticity, presides over a world that
11:16sustains life, but is rarely celebrated,
11:19and becomes a near-invisible cautionary
11:21tale. I think Perchta is a cautionary
11:23tale, but not for children who haven't
11:25tidied their bedrooms.
11:27Rather, she shows us what happens when
11:29wild knowing is belittled, tamed, and
11:31systematically suppressed. It waits for
11:33the cold of winter in which it sours
11:35into vicious judgment, pain, and the
11:38hollowing out of humanity.
11:41In the modern world, we see the
11:42real-life effect of the wild knowing's
11:44domestication in the silencing of our
11:46intuitive instincts, which happens day
11:48in, day out in a culture that values
11:50logic and in particular reason above
11:53other ways of being sure. In 1991,
11:56researchers Wilson and Schooler asked
11:58people to make choices having first
12:00instructed half of them to write down
12:01their reasons. The reason givers made
12:04worse choices. And in a later version of
12:06the study, were still less satisfied
12:08weeks afterwards. In short, thinking
12:10about why they wanted something made
12:12them pick things they liked less.
12:15Why? Because when we introspect on our
12:17reasons, we gravitate towards whatever's
12:19easiest to put into words. And what's
12:22easiest to put into words is whatever
12:24the world has already described to us.
12:26That is, long-accepted ideas or
12:28opinions, and the sensible or
12:30respectable choices that won't people up
12:32the wrong way.
12:33Intuition, though, is by definition
12:35something that exists away from
12:37language.
12:38When forced into the world of reason, it
12:40will lose the argument every time.
12:42But why would you want to leave such a
12:44cushy job? Why end the relationship when
12:46they're so lovely most of the time? Why
12:48give that person such a wide berth when
12:50they haven't done anything wrong yet?
12:53What is your reason?
12:55Each of these questions is an
12:56invitation, nay, a demand, for us to
12:58present something explicable.
13:00And the moment we do that, we are forced
13:02to edit our wilder knowing into
13:04something the world can accept. We are
13:06forced to tame it, or to domesticate it.
13:10If we wish to preserve our intuition and
13:12keep hold of it as something we can
13:13hear, understand, honor, and trust, then
13:16we need to be willing to do one very
13:18particular and very uncomfortable thing.
13:21Stop explaining ourselves.
13:24We need to be able to say, "I don't have
13:26words for it yet, and I'm not going to
13:28invent some just to make you feel
13:29comfortable." There is always a gap
13:32between knowing something and being able
13:34to defend it.
13:35And it is in that gap that we get
13:37rerouted. What Circe's time in exile
13:39truly shows us then is that the
13:41permission to stay unexplained in front
13:44of others is the very soil in which our
13:46personal magic can take root.
13:49Together, Circe and Perctuta demonstrate
13:51two possible experiences of the wild
13:53knowing. As a banished but powerful that
13:56gains our trust when given space and
13:58silence. Or as lowly less than credible
14:01women's stuff that's forced to sit
14:03around and wait for someone to pay
14:04attention. Which is never.
14:06The world we live in serves us
14:08Perctuta's version, not Circe's.
14:10With intuition relegated to the shadows,
14:12our go-getter success-forward culture
14:14prioritizes accumulable knowledge and
14:17defensible reasons. But the witch
14:19couldn't give a rat's tail about any of
14:21that.
14:22She's only interested in the knowing
14:24that she knows all of us
14:26and whether or not are ears are open to
14:27it.
14:28So are yours? Thankfully, we don't have
14:31to be literally exiled to escape the
14:32shackles of conformity. Circe did that
14:34so we don't have to. And now she lives
14:36inside each and every one of us in a
14:38quiet, beautiful land full of wild and
14:40wonderful things. I think it's time to
14:42meet her, don't you?
14:46Imagine that you're standing at the prow
14:47of a boat approaching the island of
14:49Aeaea. At first, the shore looks like
14:52nothing but perilous rock and crashing
14:54waves. But then the glamour lifts and a
14:56paradise makes itself known. Circe knows
14:59you're coming. She has opened her home
15:01to you. You follow a narrow track
15:04through the grass towards the cottage.
15:05The kind of path made by a single pair
15:07of feet that have walked the same route
15:0910,000 times and more. The witch is in
15:12the garden when you arrive bending over
15:14a dense plot of herbs.
15:15Some you recognize, some you don't.
15:17[music] She doesn't look up from her
15:18work as you approach, but she She you've
15:20arrived.
15:21Once you're close enough for your mortal
15:22ears to hear her, she simply says,
15:25"Come."
15:26When you tell this story later in life,
15:28you'll find you have no idea how long
15:29you spent on Aiaia. Your time with Circe
15:32seems fluid, almost circuitous.
15:34Days and nights merge, seasons roll into
15:37one. You learn the island as if it is a
15:39part of you.
15:41Where to find food and water, where the
15:43moss grows thickest in the woods, and
15:45how to read the shore before the weather
15:46turns.
15:47Circe teaches you nothing [music]
15:49directly, she asks no questions.
15:51Instead, she walks and you follow, and
15:54the island [music] speaks to you both
15:56about the sanctity of space and time,
15:59about the importance of waiting for a
16:00plant to mature before you clip it for
16:02propagation, about the courage required
16:04to simply trust the earth to yield what
16:06you need. One morning, Circe crouches
16:09beside a plant with purple flowers and
16:11broad flat leaves, mandrake.
16:14The witch says [music] nothing, just
16:15places a hand flat on the earth above
16:16the root and waits.
16:18After a moment, you understand that
16:20you're meant to do the same, and as you
16:22do, you find the soil itself feels alive
16:24with warmth and vibration. Circe nods as
16:27if this is enough. On the western side
16:29of the island, a craggy hill rises.
16:32It's visible from almost everywhere on
16:33Aiaia, and one day you realize that in
16:35all your wanderings, the witch has never
16:37once turned towards it. You know better
16:39than to ask about the hill, of course,
16:41but it plays on your mind [music]
16:42nonetheless.
16:43In the evenings, Circe works at her
16:45loom.
16:46The repetition soothes you.
16:48The smooth, skillful movement of the
16:50shuttle back and forth,
16:51the gradual coming together of the
16:52cloth, fine yet simple. She speaks more
16:55after the sun has set, too,
16:58telling long stories over wine or tea.
17:00You feel as if the tales she tells are
17:02picked [music] with just as much
17:03discernment and intention as the plants
17:05she forages during the day.
17:07Stories about the gods and people she
17:09has known, about the things they wanted
17:11from her that she wasn't prepared to
17:13give. She tells you that she can see,
17:15now that she's connected to the living
17:17and dying world, that immortality,
17:20to be above and away from the true
17:21cycles of life, is nothing but a cage.
17:24That it's a beautiful and tempting cage,
17:26yes, but that a golden cage is still a
17:29cage. Little by little, you begin to
17:31listen better during the day, too.
17:34To the sap moving in the plants, to the
17:36blood in your veins. You learn to
17:38understand your own intention, to prune
17:40and to add, to feel where the power
17:43[music] gathers. Circe
17:45Circe recognizes this change in you,
17:48as if it's [music] the very thing she's
17:49been waiting for.
17:50She turns then and walks away towards
17:53the craggy hill at last. It's moly you
17:56find growing at the summit, black root
17:58and white flowers, shadow and light in
18:01one.
18:01Circe kneels beside it, bare toes
18:04digging into the soil behind her. She
18:06plucks a single stem of moly, one
18:08pristine flower at its head, and hands
18:10it to you. [clears throat]
18:11"Curse-breaker," [music] she says.
18:14"Take it with you,
18:15for it's time to leave."
18:17You keep the plant close as you set sail
18:19for home. Something inside you knows
18:21that it will never wither or break.
18:23Not when the ocean rages, not when
18:25storms tear at the sails of the ship,
18:28and that when you alight on familiar
18:29shores once again, this curse-breaking
18:31plant will offer immunity to those
18:33domesticating spells cast by the world.
18:36It will offer you permission, full and
18:38ripe, to remain unexplained in front of
18:41others. This is Circe's gift to you,
18:44and the fruit of your labor on Aiaia.
18:47But how will you use it?
18:49What would it mean to have this world's
18:51spells of disconnection lifted? What
18:53would it mean to live as if you can
18:54trust what you know, what you love, what
18:57you want? What would it mean to shed
18:59this world's spells of belittlement, to
19:01fill the full size you were meant to be,
19:04to take up all the space you have?
19:07What would it mean to break free of this
19:09[music] world's spells of confinement,
19:11to transcend the categories set for you.
19:14How you're supposed to behave, what
19:16[music] you're supposed to strive for,
19:17the voice you're supposed to speak with.
19:20What would it mean to pause when asked
19:21[music] to explain your instincts?
19:23And to stay silent even as people wait.
19:26Because you honor your intuition more
19:28than you want to appease them.
19:31You look back towards Aeaea just once
19:33before the island fades from view.
19:35Circe stands on the rocks, [music] hair
19:37blowing in the breeze, eyes fixed on you
19:40and your journey.
19:41And you feel in your bones that she's
19:43asking a question now. One that you can
19:45only answer through your actions. Will
19:48you use what I taught you?
19:50Or will you merely return to your own
19:51golden cage?
19:53Thank you so much for watching. This was
19:55brought to you by Betwixt, the story of
19:57you. And if you enjoy the idea of
19:59narrative-based self-reflection, then
20:00you may like our app, too. A fantasy
20:02adventure that helps you connect with
20:04yourself. But while you're here, please
20:06do like and follow for more. I'll see
20:08you next time.

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