KOMI-SAN e como lidar com a ANSIEDADE SOCIAL| Psicologia Komi Cant Comunicate — Transcript

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1. 0:11I'm Rafael, psychologist. And STIMIDITY turns those who
2. 0:15could have been more than FRIENDS into STRANGERS. Today we will reflect on the famous KOMI-SAN. There are spoilers for the
3. 0:21first season of the anime. Come on! SOCIAL ANXIETY. I think this is the
4. 0:25FIRST ANIME that deals directly with this topic. Many characters from other stories end up
5. 0:29having traces of SOCIAL ANXIETY — one of them already mentioned here on the channel, HINATA, has it in an EVIDENT way —
6. 0:34, but the way it is shown in this anime is very STUNNING and portrays well how
7. 0:39SOCIAL ANXIETY impacts OUR LIFE in general. People who suffer from SOCIAL ANXIETY
8. 0:44have problems in COMMUNICATION, but that doesn't mean they DON'T WANT TO TALK,
9. 0:48really. This is the big message that is repeated in the anime, BREAKING THE MYTH that
10. 0:52those who have SHYNESS don't like to TALK to people and it's totally the OPPOSITE.
11. 0:56Do you have a great FEAR of being JUDGED by others? Are you SELF-CONSCIOUS in
12. 1:00EVERYDAY social situations? Do you AVOID meeting new people due to FEAR or ANXIETY?
13. 1:04If you've been feeling this way for at least 6 MONTHS and these feelings make it difficult for you
14. 1:09to do EVERYDAY TASKS, like talking to people at WORK, or at SCHOOL,
15. 1:13this could be a big sign that you have a SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER.
16. 1:16SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER (SAD) is a type of PHOBIA induced by one
17. 1:20or more SOCIAL SITUATIONS causing the individual to feel a kind of INTERNAL DISTURBANCE.
18. 1:25This DISORDER was differentiated from GENERALIZED ANXIETY DISORDER (GAD) over 50 YEARS ago
19. 1:30as they are very similar and today it is widely reported as the
20. 1:34most COMMON ANXIETY DISORDER today—overall it is the THIRD MOST COMMON DISORDER.
21. 1:38The FIRST thing we need to know about SOCIAL ANXIETY is that it is LEARNED. BABIES
22. 1:43don't stay there in the crib WORRIING if someone is going to JUDGE them, or something, or that they're going to
23. 1:47be JUDGED for what they DO or SAY —it depends on their age BABY DOESN'T SPEAK, right?— at
24. 1:51best we can say that some people are predisposed to have
25. 1:55ANXIETY SYMPTOMS in general. As far as we know, this is not a
26. 1:58PREDISPOSITION TO SOCIAL ANXIETY per se, it's a predisposition to be ANXIOUS in general.
27. 2:03ANDREAS FRICK and his colleagues, in recent studies, brought data on
28. 2:08GENETIC MARKERS specific to SOCIAL ANXIETY and they focused on CHANGES
29. 2:12in a GENE called SLCGA4 that is involved in transporting the NEUROTRANSMITTER SEROTONIN
30. 2:17— a CHEMICAL that can help people calm the NERVES and stabilize the HUMORS.
31. 2:22Both SEROTONIN SHORTAGE and EXCESS have been linked to
32. 2:26SOCIAL ANXIETY SYMPTOMS and people with SAD struggle to produce SEROTONIN CONSISTENTLY and without fluctuation.
33. 2:32The onset of an episode can cause PHYSICAL MANIFESTATIONS that include:
34. 2:36problems with BREATHING or SPEECH, feelings of PAIN, TREMORS, UNCONTROLLABLE CRYING,
35. 2:41even feelings of NAUSEA or excessive SWEATING. The main character of this anime, KOMI-SAN,
36. 2:46is a girl who suffers from EXTREME SOCIAL ANXIETY, that is, in her case it
37. 2:51is so SEVERE that it is a DISORDER. SOCIAL ANXIETY is very EVIDENT and very DESTRUCTIVE
38. 2:56in her, to the point where she CAN'T TALK and this ends up generating CONSEQUENCES for her because
39. 3:00she can't MAKE FRIENDS, can't have FRIENDS, simply because she can't
40. 3:03EXPRESS herself, she's AFRAID to have a DIALOGUE , to have a TALK, even if it is MINIMUM.
41. 3:08But luckily, she meets a boy named TADANO who decides to
42. 3:11HELP her find and make FRIENDS. He is the only one who actually OBSERVES WHAT SHE IS.
43. 3:16THE FIRST SCENE of her COMMUNICATING is her expressing herself through the PICTURE. She can't SPEAK
44. 3:21and prefers to express herself WRITING ON THE BOARD and he tries to UNDERSTAND her, in her own way,
45. 3:26he doesn't just judge her, but LETS HER EXPRESS herself and that's when he starts to change
46. 3:30her life - and it's cool that he she does this even by SAYING NOTHING verbally, TALKING.
47. 3:35He notices something about her that many people don't seem to notice in the anime and if they do, they
48. 3:40simply IGNORE it, or rather don't try to look in HER PERSPECTIVE,
49. 3:44but he manages and that's STUNNING for her. FEAR OF JUDGMENT is perhaps the
50. 3:48STRONGEST thing in someone who suffers from SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER. We see this explicitly
51. 3:52in KOMI-SAN. This characteristic of KOMI-SAN clearly contrasts with
52. 3:56NAJIMI's personality which is the complete OPPOSITE of her.
53. 3:59NAJIMI makes FRIENDS with basically ANYONE, in a totally NATURAL way.
54. 4:03There's a time when she's walking down the street with HUNDREDS OF FRIENDS—I've never done that in my life.
55. 4:07In the second episode, when she hears right away that NAJIMI didn't want to be FRIENDS with her,
56. 4:10she is SHOCKED, PALE. THE FEAR she already has of being REJECTED, at that moment, became
57. 4:16REAL. We see in her the BIG CONCERN about what others will THINK about her.
58. 4:20THE PREFRONTAL CORTEX of people with SOCIAL ANXIETY ends up amplifying the activity of the AMYGDALA
59. 4:25instead of calming it. People with SOCIAL ANXIETY have such an ingrained FEAR of
60. 4:30OTHER PEOPLE'S REACTION that their BRAINS interpret SOCIAL INTERACTIONS as a LEGITIMATE THREAT and
61. 4:35it is as if no amount of RATIONAL REFLECTION can completely CALM that FEAR.
62. 4:40She didn't even have a cell phone because she says there that she didn't need it, because she had no one to talk to, she had no friends,
63. 4:44after she manages to have a cell phone, obviously,
64. 4:47she's AFRAID to talk on the phone too — whoever, the phone rings there the heart is already
65. 4:51beating fast. It was before, see? It is not now. For example, CATASTROPHY is a very
66. 4:55RECURRING thing in those who have this DISORDER, for example, when she gets NERVOUS
67. 4:58when ringing the bell, she feels that she is going to LOCK at that time, she feels that she is going to crash at that
68. 5:02time and ANTICIPATES it and her body starts to behave as such, with NERVOSISMO.
69. 5:06The cool thing is also that the DIFFERENCE between INTROVERSION and SHYNESS is evident in the anime. INTROVERSION
70. 5:11is basically what TADANO has. Right there, in the first episode, he says that it's ok to be
71. 5:16ISOLATED, to be quiet, DISCREET and the main thing he DOESN'T SUFFER for that, it's his CHOICE.
72. 5:21This is a much bigger characteristic of INTROVERTED people, who, of course,
73. 5:25can also be SHY—which was my case. In the case of KOMI-SAN it's not the same, she can't speak,
74. 5:31SHE WANTS TO HAVE FRIENDS, but she CAN'T do that, she feels UNABLE.
75. 5:34And this SOCIAL ANXIETY makes you perceive things in a TOTALLY DISTORTED way.
76. 5:39Shyness makes you realize, sometimes, the opposite of what is happening, in fact,
77. 5:43for example, she thinks that people are HATING her, that they HATE her in some way,
78. 5:47while in REALITY it is just the OPPOSITE, people LOVE her and they want to be NEAR HER.
79. 5:52Everyone in her class practically LIKES her.
80. 5:55REJECTION for someone SHY is much stronger too. KOMI-SAN tries to DELIVER
81. 5:59something to a person on the street. She closes her eyes, delivers and the person DOESN'T SEE and she gets
82. 6:03SUPER BAD about it. THE IMPACT of that for her is BIGGER than it should be.
83. 6:07For example, the MIDDLE BRAIN or LIMBIC SYSTEM, it is responsible for keeping us SAFE and tends
84. 6:13to encode any NEGATIVE EXPERIENCE as something to AVOID in the future. Therefore, when
85. 6:18we are CRITICIZED for saying the WRONG thing as a child, or ASHAMED at school, the
86. 6:23LIMBIC SYSTEM remembers this NEGATIVE EXPERIENCE and tries to use FEAR or ANXIETY as a way to
87. 6:28AVOID it happening again. There is a saying that “Nature
88. 6:32pulls the gun and experience pulls the trigger”, meaning that PATHOLOGICAL ANXIETY
89. 6:37is a combination of BIOLOGICAL SUSCEPTIBILITY to EXCESSIVE ANXIETY along with the
90. 6:43activating experiences that shape how ANXIETY manifests. . And that's what we want to know.
91. 6:47How did KOMI-SAN start with these SYMPTOMS? What kind of EXPERIENCE ended up CAUSING this in her?
92. 6:52The model of cognitive psychologists DAVID CLARK and ADRIAN WELLS, states that individuals
93. 6:57with SAD enter a situation with COGNITIVE BIASES and CONDITIONAL BELIEFS, that is,
94. 7:02these COGNITIVE BIASES include an extraordinarily high performance for a
95. 7:08SUCCESSFUL SOCIAL INTERACTION, creating a HIGH STANDARD. which is difficult to ACHIEVE and therefore an INCREASED PERCEPTION
96. 7:14that they will fail in SOCIAL INTERACTION. KOMI-SAN always thinks she has to do well in everything
97. 7:18and when she DOESN'T REACH THAT STANDARD she feels VERY BAD and that's what makes her AVOID ACTION.
98. 7:23ERIKA PENNEY and MAREE ABBOTT, will say that these CONDITIONAL BELIEFS infer
99. 7:28strict rules that a SPECIFIC ACTION on the part of an individual will lead to
100. 7:32a NEGATIVE REACTION FROM THE PUBLIC or INTERACT. Because of this, when entering a SOCIAL SITUATION the
101. 7:37individual's ATTENTION is shifted TO THEMSELVES, a process known as "AUTOFOCUS ATTENTION",
102. 7:43that is, the person PAYS too much ATTENTION TO THEMSELVES and believes that others are doing
103. 7:48it too and this is shown well in the anime. KOMI-SAN OVERESTIMATES how much others
104. 7:53are paying attention to her. Thus, a DISCREP NCIA is created between the REPRESENTATION OF SELF
105. 7:57and the PERCEIVED PATTERN OF THE PUBLIC. And the greater this DISCREP NCIA, the greater the individual
106. 8:02with SAD believes that a NEGATIVE OUTCOME of SOCIAL INTERACTION will occur, thereby
107. 8:07manifesting itself in the individual's PHYSIOLOGY. KOMI-SAN is AFRAID of being HURT
108. 8:11people, of being a BURDEN, she says that she even HATES herself.
109. 8:15There's an episode there where she feels NERVOUS because she imagines she's going to arrive LATE,
110. 8:19that she won't arrive on time and then comes ANOTHER CHARACTERISTICS of someone
111. 8:22who suffers from SOCIAL ANXIETY, which is SUFFERING BY ANTICIPATION.
112. 8:25SELF-AWARENESS is extremely POSITIVE, only there is NEGATIVE SELF -AWARENESS
113. 8:29- when the person focuses too much on their own DEFECTS or FAILURES, or supposed.
114. 8:34And it is common for people with HIGH SOCIAL ANXIETY to have this NEGATIVE SELF-AWARENESS, that is,
115. 8:39this is also a GOOD SIDE, for example, this is a good side for a person to be SELF-CONSCIOUS, that is,
116. 8:43people tend to be very CAREFUL with others, with WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO SAY, so as not to hurt
117. 8:48people. So, we can say that they are more EMPATHIC and this ANXIETY
118. 8:52is probably also a reflection of their DESIRE to SMOOTH THEIR SOCIAL INTERACTIONS in the best possible way.
119. 8:57An ANXIOUS person's MOST DISTRESSING notions about SOCIAL INTERACTION are likely
120. 9:02based on unexplored ideas about the DANGERS OF SOCIALIZATION.
121. 9:05SHOKO is very concerned about others. It's visible how she would NEVER HURT anyone and
122. 9:10the very idea already kind of DISTURBS her. Perhaps the WORST BEHAVIORAL PROBLEM
123. 9:14for people with SOCIAL ANXIETY is the tendency to AVOID situations that cause ANXIETY.
124. 9:19When a socially anxious individual ANTICIPATES going to a party he feels ANXIETY and so
125. 9:24decides NOT to go and the ANXIETY DECREASES immediately. This ANXIETY REDUCTION, with the aim of
126. 9:29AVOIDING PARTY, reinforces avoidance or ESCAPE, and this simple REWARD FOR AVOID maintains a
127. 9:35FEAR OF NEGATIVE SOCIAL ASSESSMENT, even when the person does not experience HUMILIATION, for example.
128. 9:40If I feel ANXIOUS about approaching someone and then I decide to AVOID TALKING to that person,
129. 9:44my ANXIETY immediately decreases, but this IMMEDIATE ANXIETY DECREASE
130. 9:48teaches me one thing: to feel LESS ANXIOUS, avoid interacting with STRANGERS.
131. 9:52This is the model, in fact, that is happening with KOMI-SAN that avoided
132. 9:57contact with people all this time and this REINFORCED the image in her head that, in fact,
133. 10:01she WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO COMMUNICATE with anyone. One thing that can greatly HELP those who suffer from this
134. 10:05DISORDER is to relax their SOCIAL SECURITY BEHAVIORS and be more OPEN to their
135. 10:10own FAILURES. Almost any type of CHANGE —and it is no different from ANXIETY—, occurs
136. 10:15SLOWLY AND GRADUALLY, it is not overnight, there is no magic formula, SMALL
137. 10:20DAILY CHANGES are responsible for everything. Everyone will, at some point, SUFFER
138. 10:24from SOCIAL ANXIETY symptoms. It's part of our experience of being a HUMAN BEING,
139. 10:28of being alive—I still feel it today. When I'm going to give a LECTURE, SPEAK IN PUBLIC,
140. 10:32something like that. But unlike before, it is NOT something that PREVENTS me from doing this. It
141. 10:35's an ANXIETY that I like to feel. The GOAL is not to END SOCIAL ANXIETY
142. 10:39completely, but to make it CONTROLLABLE. May it NOT STOP you from doing what you WANT to do,
143. 10:45may it NOT STOP you from MAKING FRIENDS, from NOT BEING what you really WANT TO BE.
144. 10:49The curious thing is that I DON'T IMAGINE her talking normal to other people in the ANIME, it will be
145. 10:53COOL to see that happening and I WILL COME BACK HERE. COUNTLESS STUDIES have shown that
146. 10:56EXPOSURE THERAPY FACING YOUR FEARS is effective in treating ANXIETY DISORDERS,
147. 11:01research suggests, however, that EXPOSURE should be applied GENTLY.
148. 11:05Therefore, participate in a SOCIAL INTERACTION, or activity, that only SLIGHTLY provokes
149. 11:09your ANXIETY and work your way through it, create a HIERARCHY OF EXPOSURE,
150. 11:14identify and evaluate how each SOCIAL SITUATION makes an IMPACT on you.
151. 11:18For example, 0 would mean NO ANXIETY—this situation causes me 0 anxiety—and
152. 11:2310 would be a FULL PEAK ATTACK. You can evaluate each one and expose yourself GRADATIVELY.
153. 11:27It would be better with PROFESSIONAL HELP, of course. KOMI-SAN herself is exposing herself GRADATIVELY, PAINFULLY
154. 11:32, but we see her IMPROVING, TRYING. Having HIGH SOCIAL ANXIETY is something that
155. 11:39only those who have it, in fact, will understand how DIFFICULT and DISABLING it is and the history of
156. 11:43KOMI-SAN shows how much this is CONFLICTING. On the one hand, the person thinks that EVERYBODY IS
157. 11:48WATCHING HIM, at the same time he is with a group of friends and he feels
158. 11:53that NOBODY KNOWS THAT HE IS THERE. Like, subscribe, share. It's just the beginning.