It took me 30+ years to realize what I'll tell you in 10 minutes... — Transcript

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1. 0:00what if I told you that the thing that
2. 0:01you're desperately chasing the perfect
3. 0:04body Fame success more money isn't
4. 0:07actually what you want I have spent 30
5. 0:10years figuring this out and I'm going to
6. 0:12save you Decades of time frustration and
7. 0:14suffering in the next 10 minutes we all
8. 0:17do this we all tell ourselves I'll be
9. 0:19happy when I'll be happy when I lose
10. 0:22weight I'll be happy when I get the
11. 0:23promotion I'll be happy when I have a
12. 0:25partner I'll finally be respected when
13. 0:27I'm successful but here's the truth I
14. 0:29wish I had have known earlier hi I'm
15. 0:31Maggie welcome to my channel so this is
16. 0:34embarrassing to admit but I used to want
17. 0:36to be famous like I really wanted it
18. 0:38ever since I was 12 and I had my first
19. 0:40role in the school play I got attention
20. 0:43I got accolades and I thought this is
21. 0:45pretty good I want this and like many
22. 0:48many actors it came from a deep place of
23. 0:50unworthiness know like a lot of kids I
24. 0:53felt overlooked not seen not special and
25. 0:56so acting gave me that moment of
26. 0:59attention that moment to shine it was
27. 1:01something that people said that I was
28. 1:03good at so I thought to myself in my
29. 1:05little child brain if I get famous then
30. 1:08everyone will like me then life will
31. 1:10work out then I'll be happy I chased
32. 1:12that dream for years the auditions the
33. 1:15rejections the small winds always
34. 1:17thinking the next role would be the one
35. 1:19that made me feel complete but here's
36. 1:22what I've learned I'm worthy right now
37. 1:25and you're worthy right now we're worthy
38. 1:27because we exist we've all heard the
39. 1:29Stories the gym carries of the world who
40. 1:31say that once they became famous they
41. 1:34felt empty and hollow inside why because
42. 1:37they chasing the wrong thing they
43. 1:39weren't actually seeking fame they were
44. 1:41seeking love validation and acceptance
45. 1:45things that they could have given
46. 1:46themselves all along things that I could
47. 1:48have given myself all along another
48. 1:50example from my life is that I thought
49. 1:52that no one would love me unless I was
50. 1:54thin any relationship that didn't work
51. 1:56out I would think it was because I
52. 1:57wasn't thin enough or pretty enough this
53. 2:00belief controlled every facet of my life
54. 2:03I was absolutely obsessed with it and
55. 2:05guess what I did get thin and I did find
56. 2:08love and now I'm 7 years into that
57. 2:10relationship with my dream partner who
58. 2:13was literally everything I've ever
59. 2:14wanted and as you do when you're in
60. 2:17relationships sometimes you let yourself
61. 2:18go a little bit and I gained some weight
62. 2:20and it still was an obsession in this
63. 2:22relationship even though I had love do
64. 2:25have love right now but I had this
65. 2:27realization what I really wanted wasn't
66. 2:29the perfect body or the perfect
67. 2:31relationship what I wanted was my own
68. 2:35love to feel love for myself to approve
69. 2:38of myself to deeply accept myself as I
70. 2:41am no matter what I weigh no matter what
71. 2:44I look like to be okay no matter what
72. 2:47and I could have given myself that a
73. 2:49long time ago as well think about it how
74. 2:53many times have you chased a goal
75. 2:55achieved the goal and then felt happy
76. 2:58for a minute or two
77. 3:01and then you're on to the next goal then
78. 3:03you felt that dissatisfaction that itch
79. 3:05that urge to achieve something else you
80. 3:07know I work with the elderly I'm a
81. 3:09podiatrist and most of my patients are
82. 3:11over 70 a lot of them well over 80 over
83. 3:1490 and I've even got some over 100 and
84. 3:16I've been doing this job for over 20
85. 3:18years and let me tell you that gives you
86. 3:20a whole new perspective on life I know
87. 3:23what it looks like to age well I know
88. 3:25what it looks like to age poorly and I'm
89. 3:26not talking about looks I'm talking
90. 3:28about mobility and health I have
91. 3:30patients in Housing Commission Flats I
92. 3:33have patients that are in multi-million
93. 3:35dollar homes overlooking the beach I've
94. 3:37got patients who spend all of their
95. 3:39money on lottery tickets and when I ask
96. 3:41them what are you going to do if you win
97. 3:43they say what do I need all that money
98. 3:45for I would just give it to my family so
99. 3:47they're spending all their pension money
100. 3:49all their spare money even in this cost
101. 3:51of living crisis on lottery tickets for
102. 3:55a dream that they're not even going to
103. 3:57enjoy because they feel too old to enjoy
104. 4:00life however I also have some patients
105. 4:03who are amazing they're so curious they
106. 4:06got a sparkle in their eye they're so
107. 4:09fun to be around they got a great sense
108. 4:11of humor they'll say I look in the
109. 4:13mirror I don't recognize that old lady
110. 4:15so I just keep walking you know they
111. 4:18never stop growing they've got purpose
112. 4:21whether it's gardening or traveling some
113. 4:24of them are doing crazy things like I
114. 4:26had this patient who's like 85 or
115. 4:29something and she jump jumped out of a
116. 4:30plane these patients are so inspiring
117. 4:33there's really something about them they
118. 4:35tend to be really joyful and really
119. 4:38content and really accepting and I think
120. 4:41these patients whether consciously or
121. 4:43unconsciously they understand something
122. 4:45crucial and that is we're either
123. 4:47evolving or devolving but we're never
124. 4:50staying the same if you're not growing
125. 4:52and learning and experiencing you are
126. 4:54dying you're getting smaller your world
127. 4:57is getting smaller you're stunted no one
128. 4:59is going to stay the same I had a
129. 5:01patient the other day who was
130. 5:03complaining to me about her wrinkles and
131. 5:06she was
132. 5:0792 complaining about her wrinkles
133. 5:10because her 7-year-old daughter-in-law
134. 5:13has lovely skin and she was envious of
135. 5:16that skin and wanting to get the $12
136. 5:18skin care product moisturizer that her
137. 5:20daughter-in-law has and I'm like you're
138. 5:2392 I have so many patients who will say
139. 5:27how old do you think I am this obsession
140. 5:30with what we look like externally
141. 5:33doesn't stop unless you choose to stop
142. 5:35it you want to know what true freedom
143. 5:37feels like it's when something that used
144. 5:40to scare you doesn't scare you anymore
145. 5:43when you can speak in front of people
146. 5:45without your heart racing when people
147. 5:48who used to bother you who maybe were
148. 5:49mean to you or cruel to you when their
149. 5:51words don't affect you anymore when you
150. 5:53don't care what people think when you've
151. 5:56had wounds and triggers that used to
152. 5:58just set you off when it's like like
153. 5:59water off a duck's back that's true
154. 6:02Freedom when you can look in the mirror
155. 6:05and see your aging face and completely
156. 6:08accept yourself and love yourself when
157. 6:10you can look at your middle-aged body
158. 6:12and go yes my body is changing but I
159. 6:14still love it when you can walk into a
160. 6:17party and not be thinking what will
161. 6:19people think of me but be thinking I'm
162. 6:22curious who's here who can I meet what
163. 6:24can I learn today that's what real
164. 6:27confidence looks like not the fake kind
165. 6:30when you're seeking validation where
166. 6:31you're putting photos of yourself on
167. 6:33Instagram to make it look like you have
168. 6:35a wonderful life real confidence is when
169. 6:38external things don't get to you anymore
170. 6:40where you're not walking around getting
171. 6:42offended taking things personally or
172. 6:44being triggered by people no one has
173. 6:47that power over you I used to
174. 6:49desperately want to pay off my mortgage
175. 6:51I still do of course I want to pay off
176. 6:53my mortgage but I used to think I
177. 6:55wouldn't feel safe until I paid off my
178. 6:57mortgage which is 25 years
179. 7:00and then someone said to me imagine
180. 7:03having paid off your mortgage and then
181. 7:05think about finances what comes up for
182. 7:07you and I'm like oh well I've got to pay
183. 7:09the rates and I've got to pay the bills
184. 7:11and I've got to pay the XY Z and what if
185. 7:13this and what if that and then it became
186. 7:15very clear to me that my fear was around
187. 7:18scarcity of there not being enough of
188. 7:20not being safe but I can give myself
189. 7:22that feeling of Safety and Security
190. 7:24right now by trusting that it's a
191. 7:26benevolent Universe trusting that things
192. 7:29always work out for me by reframing the
193. 7:32negative into the positive I'm
194. 7:34bastardizing this but I think Einstein
195. 7:36said you need to decide if this universe
196. 7:38is friendly or not and for a long time I
197. 7:41thought the universe was not friendly
198. 7:43but now I truly believe that she is
199. 7:45benevolent she is always pushing you and
200. 7:48helping you to grow and to give you the
201. 7:50things that you say that you want
202. 7:52however that looks like it may not be
203. 7:53how you think it should look but that's
204. 7:55what she's doing I had an experience
205. 7:57recently with my YouTube channel which I
206. 7:59really really want to grow I love it so
207. 8:02much I genuinely love YouTube so now's
208. 8:05probably a good time to ask you to like
209. 8:06And subscribe and maybe comment if
210. 8:07you're enjoying this video but yes
211. 8:09recently I released a video and it did
212. 8:11really well it's at 33,000 views which
213. 8:14is huge for me very very exciting it's
214. 8:17what I always wanted and then something
215. 8:19interesting happened fear began to creep
216. 8:21in a little bit I started to get a
217. 8:24little worried about the next video what
218. 8:26if it doesn't do so well what if it was
219. 8:28a one wonder what if I can't replicate
220. 8:31that success I had forgotten the whole
221. 8:33point the whole point is to grow is to
222. 8:37serve is to evolve it's to add value to
223. 8:40people through my videos it's not to go
224. 8:42viral of course I would love my videos
225. 8:44to do well but keeping it in perspective
226. 8:47what is the point the point is to make
227. 8:49videos that help touch move and inspire
228. 8:52people to help them lead a compassionate
229. 8:54life a joyful life offering the
230. 8:57knowledge and wisdom that I've gained
231. 8:58over my 48 years everyone has something
232. 9:01to offer everyone has life experience
233. 9:03there's always something to offer so the
234. 9:06journey is the destination a lot of
235. 9:09people say it's not the journey it's the
236. 9:11destination but a wise teacher of mine
237. 9:13said the journey is the destination this
238. 9:16is it this is it not when I get 100,000
239. 9:20subscribers or not when you know you're
240. 9:23thin or you're rich or whatever the
241. 9:26journey is the destination the Joy isn't
242. 9:29reaching the goal it's the process of
243. 9:31getting there it's all the little wins
244. 9:33and victories and struggles along the
245. 9:36way it's the hero's journey it's when
246. 9:38you're you take your first step and
247. 9:40you've got your backpack and then you
248. 9:43you travel along and there's dragons you
249. 9:44got to slay and then there's things you
250. 9:46got to overcome obstacles scary forests
251. 9:51old man with a crystal ball all these
252. 9:54things that is the hero's journey and
253. 9:56that is life the journey is the
254. 9:58destination
255. 10:00it's not getting to the peak of the
256. 10:01mountain although that is nice once
257. 10:03you're there then there's another
258. 10:04mountain and then there's another
259. 10:06mountain and then there's another
260. 10:07Mountain thank God there's another
261. 10:09Mountain so here's what it took me 30
262. 10:11years to understand you can have
263. 10:14everything you want right now because
264. 10:17everything you think you want is because
265. 10:20it's going to give you a feeling it's
266. 10:23going to give you a feeling of being
267. 10:24loved accepted validated enough approved
268. 10:27of all the things you're actually
269. 10:30searching for that feeling and you can
270. 10:31give yourself that feeling right here
271. 10:34right now you want to feel worthy give
272. 10:37yourself permission to feel worthy right
273. 10:39now and you're so worthy you're so
274. 10:41worthy you're worthy because you exist
275. 10:43you're an aspect of God you want to feel
276. 10:46safe now then choose to feel safe now
277. 10:49choose to believe that you live in a
278. 10:51safe benevolent universe that loves you
279. 10:54you want to feel loved now don't wait
280. 10:56till you meet that partner love yourself
281. 10:59now make the choice to love yourself now
282. 11:01develop a relationship with yourself
283. 11:03right now we're meant to grow we're
284. 11:05meant to evolve We're Meant To Dream Big
285. 11:07Dreams but not because those dreams will
286. 11:10make us happy it's because the process
287. 11:13of growing itself is what brings
288. 11:15fulfillment look at your own life what
289. 11:18are you waiting for what is the thing
290. 11:21that you think will make you feel
291. 11:23complete or whole or happy or content
292. 11:26and give that to yourself right now the
293. 11:29choice is yours are you going to wait
294. 11:31till someday to Feel Complete life is
295. 11:33not about meeting some magical
296. 11:35destination it's about growing until we
297. 11:38take our last breath it's about evolving
298. 11:41and trying things out and being the best
299. 11:43we can be you know every time we try
300. 11:46something new we step out of our comfort
301. 11:48zone new doors open new opportunities
302. 11:51appear it is amazing what can happen
303. 11:54when you get into your discomfort Zone
304. 11:57it really is a hero's journey I so
305. 11:59excited by life every year that I look
306. 12:02back on the last year and think oh God
307. 12:04that wasn't a good look oh how
308. 12:06embarrassing that's a good thing that
309. 12:08shows that I'm now in a position where I
310. 12:11can do better than I did then and I hope
311. 12:13to live that way for the rest of my life
312. 12:15thank you so much for watching much love
313. 12:18see you in the next video