I’m the Problem. Now What? | The Operator’s Edge Ep. 8 — Transcript

Full transcript

1. 0:00I'm pretty fucking mad right now. I know
2. 0:02what the problem is and I know what the
3. 0:05answer is.
4. 0:06And I say it.
5. 0:09It's me. I'm the problem.
6. 0:12When I make a mistake, it's my fault. I
7. 0:14put myself in that position.
8. 0:17What really pissed off about is that
9. 0:19when I try to explain that I understand
10. 0:21it's me and I'm
11. 0:22relaying that, but I still get argued.
12. 0:26That's what pisses me off.
13. 0:28And the only way I can relate is to uh
14. 0:31everything that I'm doing right now and
15. 0:33what the business is about and where I'm
16. 0:35at life and all this stuff.
17. 0:37It goes back to two things. What are
18. 0:38they, but
19. 0:41you got to place yourself with people
20. 0:42that are going to help you get there.
21. 0:44Be in that room.
22. 0:47And he for some says, "You're not going
23. 0:49to
24. 0:50you're not going to go to the next
25. 0:51level. You're not going to do greater
26. 0:52things
27. 0:54with the things that you did at the last
28. 0:55level." I know all this shit. I know it.
29. 0:58And here we are.
30. 1:00Guess who's not making the decision? Me.
31. 1:04I'm projecting it on to everybody else
32. 1:07right now through anger, being mad
33. 1:11because I can't make the decision.
34. 1:12Relationships,
35. 1:15personal, business,
36. 1:17my own blood,
37. 1:20business partnerships,
38. 1:23all that stuff.
39. 1:26Two industries I was in
40. 1:29for 27 years, each time I knew
41. 1:32when I needed to fucking go and I didn't
42. 1:34do it.
43. 1:35One of them,
44. 1:36fucked up hardcore. Stupid. And the
45. 1:38other one, idiot.
46. 1:40Staying there way too long.
47. 1:42And I always say it like this, it almost
48. 1:43killed me.
49. 1:45The other one,
50. 1:47one time I fucked up. The other one, I
51. 1:49still don't know what the hell I did.
52. 1:53But I also needed throughout those both
53. 1:55of those times,
54. 1:57I could place blame on everything else
55. 1:58and everybody, but it was me. I should
56. 2:00have gone out when I knew it. I should
57. 2:02taken the jump. I should take the And to
58. 2:04be honest with you, I pull the trigger
59. 2:04faster than most people do.
60. 2:07I really do pull the trigger faster than
61. 2:09most people do.
62. 2:12But it was slow for me.
63. 2:15I got to listen to myself sometime. I
64. 2:16got to trust myself, and I didn't.
65. 2:19And right now, I'm pissed off because
66. 2:21I'm not
67. 2:23making decisions that
68. 2:25I know need to be made.
69. 2:27Because of loyalty, because of what I'm
70. 2:29trying to rebuild, because of where I
71. 2:32think I need to be.
72. 2:34Then
73. 2:35I had a conversation with my daughter
74. 2:36over text message
75. 2:37basically saying that she's 24 years
76. 2:39old.
77. 2:41I'm trying to help her, trying to be
78. 2:43better for her. I'm trying to be a
79. 2:44better father.
80. 2:46Because
81. 2:48I wasn't the greatest when she was
82. 2:49growing up. But she's living with me at
83. 2:5024. I'm going to do the best that I can.
84. 2:52I have an opportunity to do it now, and
85. 2:53I'm doing it. Yes, it takes a little bit
86. 2:55for her to understand that,
87. 2:57but
88. 3:00at least I acknowledged it. At least I'm
89. 3:01trying.
90. 3:02I'm not making excuses for it.
91. 3:05But even that relationship, I don't
92. 3:07know. I may have to make a hard decision
93. 3:08on that one, too.
94. 3:10Because she ain't going to listen.
95. 3:13She
96. 3:14or she doesn't want to. I'm sorry, I
97. 3:16shouldn't say it like this. If she
98. 3:17doesn't want to listen and do the work,
99. 3:21I have to be with people that want to do
100. 3:22the work.
101. 3:25I don't win. I can't continue to grow
102. 3:28and be better because if I'm doing
103. 3:30things with people that don't want to do
104. 3:31the work, what does it matter? It's
105. 3:33when you're a business
106. 3:35or a relationship, we'll say both,
107. 3:36whatever.
108. 3:38You've been with this person for 5
109. 3:39years, or you've known this person for 5
110. 3:41years or 10 years, or whatever the case
111. 3:42may be.
112. 3:44But you do the same thing over and over
113. 3:45again.
114. 3:46What's the difference in
115. 3:48self-destructing by
116. 3:50going and drinking or just doing
117. 3:51something that's addicting or something
118. 3:53like that. You spend a bunch of money,
119. 3:54go gambling. Whatever the case is.
120. 3:56Here's the difference.
121. 3:58Holding yourself back.
122. 4:02Same as your business. You're if you're
123. 4:03at a job that you're just like, fuck
124. 4:04this sucks.
125. 4:06Then go out and do something else. Who
126. 4:07cares? Again.
127. 4:11I'm going to
128. 4:12make some phone calls and probably do
129. 4:14whatever
130. 4:15after I was let go and all this stuff,
131. 4:16but I here I am.
132. 4:18I'm doing something I never wanted to
133. 4:20fucking do.
134. 4:21And that's live.
135. 4:23Like
136. 4:26we'll just say it like
137. 4:28kind of living like I'm
138. 4:31back in the you know days when I
139. 4:33was really making dumb decisions and I
140. 4:34had to go to
141. 4:35like discount food so I can get That's
142. 4:37where I'm at.
143. 4:38To grow.
144. 4:41Because every person that I know it and
145. 4:43I'm talking to you now that's your
146. 4:44response where I want to be. That's what
147. 4:45they say and I'm actually in rooms with
148. 4:47those types of people.
149. 4:50And I am inspired again. I would rather
150. 4:52be doing what I'm doing right now
151. 4:53because
152. 4:54I'm in that room.
153. 4:57And I want to go after those guys. I've
154. 4:59made multiple comments to a couple of
155. 5:01them.
156. 5:01Hell, I'm even calling them out right
157. 5:02here.
158. 5:04But the thing about it is
159. 5:06it's me.
160. 5:07Is this fine because
161. 5:09I'm living out the Ascent program right
162. 5:11now in the cohort and the self-guided
163. 5:13and I'm living that out right now like
164. 5:15literally.
165. 5:17Making the change.
166. 5:19Jumping off the diving board like the
167. 5:21personal story. All of that stuff is in
168. 5:23there and then it's like
169. 5:25and here I am. I'm still living it.
170. 5:28Whether I was
171. 5:29in my early 20s in the restaurant
172. 5:30business or here I am in my mid-40s
173. 5:33doing my own thing finally.
174. 5:37It's it's always it it never changes. I
175. 5:39didn't
176. 5:41make a course and put all my life out on
177. 5:43the internet all this stuff
178. 5:45because I know it all. I did to because
179. 5:47it's an ongoing thing.
180. 5:49You know, the ones actually don't do
181. 5:51this stuff cuz if they've got it all
182. 5:52figured out, a lot of them, or they're
183. 5:53too scared.
184. 5:55Don't tell me you're scared. Put
185. 5:57yourself out there. There's I don't know
186. 5:58how many billion people on YouTube?
187. 6:01I'm my biggest critic. Somebody says
188. 6:03that I'm terrible. There's no likes or
189. 6:04whatever.
190. 6:06I'm the one that's self-destructing
191. 6:07inside, not they don't give a shit out
192. 6:09there.
193. 6:13That's what I want to really understand
194. 6:14is just
195. 6:15cares. Go.
196. 6:17Do it.
197. 6:19And I had to do it myself.
198. 6:21There's a couple things that I'm
199. 6:22thinking about right now.
200. 6:25What do you take a little plan and and
201. 6:26I'm
202. 6:27making moves quick.
203. 6:29Week
204. 6:30two weeks
205. 6:31those moves will be done. And and
206. 6:32life-changing moves.
207. 6:36But here's the thing.
208. 6:40If I can't do it for me
209. 6:42I don't make the change if I'm not
210. 6:43giving to doing what I need to do for me
211. 6:46you see what happens.
212. 6:48I project it as anger and I
213. 6:54don't help. I hurt.
214. 6:57Even when I'm doing good. Even when I'm
215. 6:59using the skills and everything that I
216. 7:00know and it's not being
217. 7:02unders- understood and it's not taken in
218. 7:04by the other person. Because
219. 7:06they're so close to it and they don't
220. 7:08want to change.
221. 7:09That's the problem. That's called
222. 7:11self-sabotage.
223. 7:13That's what I'm doing. I'm
224. 7:14self-sabotaging in that type of
225. 7:16environment. I'm putting myself in the
226. 7:18wrong environment.
227. 7:20And I think sometimes I have the wrong
228. 7:21relationships.
229. 7:23There's two people that
230. 7:25I've helped personal one, professional
231. 7:29two.
232. 7:30And personal, so my personal both.
233. 7:33Do you think those people have watched
234. 7:35any episodes of mine? Do you think that
235. 7:37they've
236. 7:38even said, "Man, you're doing a great
237. 7:39job."
238. 7:41No, but they want to talk to me all
239. 7:42night long and and ask me questions and
240. 7:45tell me the same stories
241. 7:47that I and I'm like, I'm done done
242. 7:48hearing that shit.
243. 7:51Oh, you're not doing anything about it.
244. 7:52So,
245. 7:53do something about it or don't.
246. 7:55So, I'm taking my own advice. I'm doing
247. 7:56something about it. Here we are.
248. 7:58Self-awareness,
249. 8:00clarity,
250. 8:01understanding who you are takes a lot of
251. 8:04work.
252. 8:05It takes a lot of
253. 8:06self
254. 8:10reflection.
255. 8:12You got to be okay with being mad at
256. 8:13yourself.
257. 8:15Look at this. Think about it. Who care
258. 8:17Who else cares? They say
259. 8:19they do.
260. 8:21But you know how many people said that
261. 8:21they cared?
262. 8:23And how many people I actually talk to
263. 8:24these days? I know a lot of people over
264. 8:25the years.
265. 8:26A lot of people.
266. 8:28Some of them are really good friends.
267. 8:29Some of them have been there for a long
268. 8:30time.
269. 8:32I'm sitting in a Tesla right now talking
270. 8:34to myself, and I do that a lot. I'm even
271. 8:37having conversations with Ryan AI, who's
272. 8:40amazing right now, by the way.
273. 8:42And Dan AI.
274. 8:44And that's what I'm doing work with.
275. 8:46And the amazing conversations that I'm
276. 8:48having with some new business partners
277. 8:49that that I haven't made anything any
278. 8:51money with yet, but the relationships in
279. 8:54my in my fishbowl are growing.
280. 8:58What I mean by that is
281. 9:00two people
282. 9:01great people
283. 9:02are in India. One is in South Korea
284. 9:04hearing about
285. 9:06an hour.
286. 9:07That's a pretty big fishbowl.
287. 9:11And we get those kinds of relationships,
288. 9:13those are life-changing because you're
289. 9:14not only getting
290. 9:16you're not only growing as a business or
291. 9:18spreading your word and scaling. You're
292. 9:20growing as a person and doing things
293. 9:23are supposed to be done in this day and
294. 9:25age. We're not supposed to sit at home
295. 9:27and do nothing all day long. We're
296. 9:28supposed to go out and venture, and
297. 9:29there's so many ways to do it.
298. 9:31But most of us would rather play a video
299. 9:33game and let me talk to some guy about
300. 9:35how he's going to
301. 9:36better his business and people and all
302. 9:37this stuff.
303. 9:39Do what it is you want to do.
304. 9:41But that's
305. 9:44important to me to share right now
306. 9:45because there's a lot of things going on
307. 9:46right now that that is you're obviously
308. 9:47seeing it. I'm projecting a projection
309. 9:50comes from inside. It's my own anger.
310. 9:52I'm pissed at myself.
311. 9:55It's okay to be mad at yourself. It's
312. 9:57okay to do these things. It's okay cuz
313. 9:59it's who you are. You're him.
314. 10:03But
315. 10:06just learn and just be better
316. 10:09and understand even when when you are
317. 10:11trying to
318. 10:14show people that you know that
319. 10:17you're the problem. I am the problem.
320. 10:19But they still want to argue.
321. 10:21That's when you walk away.
322. 10:23That's when you walk away.
323. 10:24Because you can't get through that
324. 10:26person cuz they can't fix you. You can't
325. 10:29fix them. And there's something going on
326. 10:31them that they have to deal with first.
327. 10:34Their own self-awareness.
328. 10:37So project as much as you can. Positive,
329. 10:40negative, it don't matter.
330. 10:42Because people feed on it. And sometimes
331. 10:44the negative projection people will feed
332. 10:46on that.
333. 10:48Positives touches a lot of people.
334. 10:51Just make an impact. Who cares? Just do
335. 10:54what you do. You're human. You got a
336. 10:56spirit and soul. Inspire.
337. 11:00Go to sleep and I know that you did
338. 11:01everything you could.