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How to Turn ADHD Into a Genius-Level Advantage — Transcript

by Ruri Ohama · 4,708 words · 677 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

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  1. 0:00If you have ADHD and you're spending all
  2. 0:01of your energy, time, resources, and
  3. 0:04money just trying to be normal, you're
  4. 0:06actually taking the biggest risk of your
  5. 0:08life. Not because being normal is bad.
  6. 0:10It's actually because you will never get
  7. 0:11there. And the longer you try, the more
  8. 0:13you will lose. Think about how much
  9. 0:15you're burning just to keep up. How many
  10. 0:17resources, how much willpower just to be
  11. 0:19average at things neurotypical people do
  12. 0:22on autopilot. You are trying so hard
  13. 0:24just to be mediocre or even maybe blow
  14. 0:27mediocre. You are trying to win a race
  15. 0:29that was not designed for you. When you
  16. 0:30look at neurotypical people, you see
  17. 0:32them doing things effortlessly, paying
  18. 0:34bills on time, keeping their houses
  19. 0:35clean, following through on boring tasks
  20. 0:37without having a big crisis like you do.
  21. 0:39And you think this is what normal looks
  22. 0:41like. This is what I'm supposed to be.
  23. 0:43But why am I not able to do such normal
  24. 0:45things? Just trying to live a normal
  25. 0:47life is using all of your energy and
  26. 0:49willpower. And maybe on your absolute
  27. 0:51best day, after spending all the
  28. 0:53enormous amount of energy and willpower
  29. 0:55you have, you just become a mediocre
  30. 0:57neurotypical adult. So you develop this
  31. 0:59inner voice saying, "Why can I not do
  32. 1:01what everyone else does? Why am I
  33. 1:03failing at living a normal adult life?
  34. 1:06This should not be hard. There's
  35. 1:07something fundamentally lacking with me.
  36. 1:09Does this mean am I not going to be able
  37. 1:11to achieve something bigger than other
  38. 1:13people because I'm struggling with just
  39. 1:15living a regular life?" Okay, so I'm not
  40. 1:17going to give you a full neuroscience
  41. 1:18lecture, but you need to understand one
  42. 1:20thing about your brain because it
  43. 1:21changes how you approach everything.
  44. 1:23ADHD is actually not a deficit of
  45. 1:25attention, even though the name suggests
  46. 1:26that. The real issue is that you cannot
  47. 1:28control where your focus goes. Your
  48. 1:30attention is either zero or a max. It's
  49. 1:32not that your attention doesn't exist.
  50. 1:34And normal people control their
  51. 1:36attention and whenever they need to do
  52. 1:37this thing, they shift their attention
  53. 1:39to there even though sometimes they
  54. 1:40struggle with it. And the thing is that
  55. 1:42even though everyone struggles with
  56. 1:43focus and procrastination, with ADHD,
  57. 1:46even when the consequences are so high,
  58. 1:48you still do struggle with it or you do
  59. 1:51not even realize that your attention
  60. 1:53went somewhere else. It's not like oops
  61. 1:54I forget a deadline but for example for
  62. 1:56me I put off renewing my ID and almost
  63. 1:59could not enter the country and I was
  64. 2:01almost got banned and I knew the
  65. 2:04consequences and I really wanted to do
  66. 2:06it but for somehow every single day my
  67. 2:08attention drifted into somewhere else
  68. 2:10and I forgot to do that thing. So it's
  69. 2:12not really about wanting more or having
  70. 2:15self-discipline. When something gives
  71. 2:16you dopamine you lock in with a level of
  72. 2:18intensity that most people will never
  73. 2:20experience. When it does not, you are
  74. 2:22neurologically incapable of engaging.
  75. 2:25Zero or max. That is your operating
  76. 2:27system. That is what ADHD is. Once you
  77. 2:29accept the fact that you cannot control
  78. 2:31your attention, you stop asking how do I
  79. 2:33fix myself and start asking how do I
  80. 2:36point this zero or max energy into the
  81. 2:38right direction. This is actually the
  82. 2:40trap trying to fit into a system that
  83. 2:42was not built for you. The world is
  84. 2:43designed for linear thinkers because
  85. 2:45they are the majority. schools, jobs,
  86. 2:47institutions, they all reward
  87. 2:49consistency, routine, and
  88. 2:51predictability, which are all the things
  89. 2:53that you don't have. And they punish
  90. 2:54nonlinear thinking, chaos, and
  91. 2:57unpredictability, which means they
  92. 2:59punish you. So, you spend your whole
  93. 3:01life trying to become someone you're not
  94. 3:03because the system tries to mold you,
  95. 3:04whether that's school, your parents, or
  96. 3:06the society. And the result is that
  97. 3:08burned out mediocre adult who has never
  98. 3:10discovered what they're actually capable
  99. 3:12of. The biggest risk you can take in
  100. 3:14life is not pursuing an unconventional
  101. 3:16path if you have ADHD. The biggest risk
  102. 3:19is spending your entire life trying to
  103. 3:22be normal, never discovering your
  104. 3:23potential, and ending up at average or
  105. 3:26below average at something you were
  106. 3:28never designed for. So why should you
  107. 3:30listen to me? Why should you care about
  108. 3:31what I'm going to say? Right? Because at
  109. 3:33the end of the day, I'm a random person
  110. 3:34on the internet. The reason is quite
  111. 3:36simple. because I built a successful
  112. 3:38life around my ADHD without fixing or
  113. 3:41turning myself into what society expects
  114. 3:43me to be. I built this YouTube channel
  115. 3:45from zero to almost 1.5 million
  116. 3:47subscribers after years and years and
  117. 3:49years of failure and everyone telling me
  118. 3:51to quit. And actually, I used this
  119. 3:53YouTube channel, the money that I made
  120. 3:55when my uncle scammed my dad and we
  121. 3:57almost went bankrupt to support my
  122. 3:59parents financially and retire them at
  123. 4:0121. And to be honest, right now in life,
  124. 4:03I don't have anything to complain. I
  125. 4:05really love my life and I did all of
  126. 4:07this not by fixing my ADHD or changing
  127. 4:09who I am but building a life around it
  128. 4:11that maximizes my strengths. But when
  129. 4:14you look at all these external factors,
  130. 4:16you might think I'm such a successful
  131. 4:17person. I'm so good at life. But no, I
  132. 4:19actually suck at normal life. I'm a
  133. 4:21disaster. You know, like for example, I
  134. 4:23forgot to apply to university two times
  135. 4:25in a row even though I had that deadline
  136. 4:27on my calendar like 6 months beforehand.
  137. 4:30And I had reminders every single
  138. 4:32freaking day reminding me to apply that.
  139. 4:34And I forgot two years in a row. How is
  140. 4:36that even possible? And I also pay my
  141. 4:39taxes late every single year that the
  142. 4:41late fee, the fines are literally became
  143. 4:44my budget now. And my mom wrote on her
  144. 4:46blog about how disgustingly dirty my
  145. 4:49apartment was. So when I tell you that
  146. 4:51trying to live a normal life is the
  147. 4:52biggest risk, I am the living example of
  148. 4:55it. So let me explain in this video. So
  149. 4:57what do we need to do instead? How can
  150. 4:59we design our life to maximize on this
  151. 5:01ability? It's by accepting few truths
  152. 5:04that nobody actually wants to say out
  153. 5:06loud. The first thing is that accept
  154. 5:07your weaknesses then stop fighting them.
  155. 5:10In this big book where a Japanese
  156. 5:11psychiatrist talks about all the
  157. 5:13neurodedevelopmental disorders that I
  158. 5:15read is saying that there was a parent
  159. 5:16who had a child with ADHD who kept
  160. 5:18losing their erasers at school and
  161. 5:20instead of punishing that kid, what
  162. 5:22parents did was accepting that erasers
  163. 5:24are something that gets lost. And
  164. 5:26instead of punishing the kid and getting
  165. 5:28angry towards that kid, they kept buying
  166. 5:30new erasers and they said it's fine. And
  167. 5:32that one shift removed all the stress,
  168. 5:33all the shame, all the conflict. Erasers
  169. 5:35gets lost. That is the reality. And that
  170. 5:38self-confidence of the kid started to
  171. 5:40skyrocket. And that spill into other
  172. 5:42areas of his life. If your parents did
  173. 5:44not give you that understanding, you can
  174. 5:46give it to yourself right now. The first
  175. 5:48step is killing the concept of normal as
  176. 5:50you should be. You are supposed to do
  177. 5:52this. You are supposed to be able to do
  178. 5:54that. No, deny that. There is such no
  179. 5:56such thing as normal. If you keep doing
  180. 5:58things even though you try, then that is
  181. 6:00your normal. You will lose things. You
  182. 6:02will be late. You will forget. The food
  183. 6:04will rot in the fridge. You might forget
  184. 6:05your taxes. It is fine and they happen.
  185. 6:08Okay? Stop treating these as character
  186. 6:10flaws or there's something fundamentally
  187. 6:12lacking with you. If you are struggling
  188. 6:14with these, then what we need to do is
  189. 6:16not internalize it as a failure, but
  190. 6:18build systems and build methods that
  191. 6:20actually will prevent them. Not going
  192. 6:22deep inside and fighting with your self-
  193. 6:23value. The first one is that double down
  194. 6:25on your strength and ignore all your
  195. 6:27weaknesses. This is something that
  196. 6:29actually I heard Elon Musk talking
  197. 6:30about. He is never like officially
  198. 6:32diagnosed, but he claims he has
  199. 6:34Asperers, which is now called autism, a
  200. 6:37high functioning autism, which I read
  201. 6:39his book and he definitely shows a lot
  202. 6:41of signs of it. And autism and ADHD
  203. 6:43often times overlap because they are
  204. 6:45under the neurodedevelopmental
  205. 6:46disorders. But anyway, he was talking
  206. 6:48about that he had obviously a lot of
  207. 6:49weaknesses with a lot of social issues
  208. 6:51and of his interests as well. But what
  209. 6:53he was trying to do instead of treating
  210. 6:55his weaknesses and become an allrounder
  211. 6:57of a mediocre or slightly below
  212. 6:59mediocre, it is way better to maximizing
  213. 7:02your strengths that you become
  214. 7:04exceptional. And the most important
  215. 7:06thing with ADHD is abusing this and
  216. 7:10becoming exceptional at something else
  217. 7:12that you're interested in. Therefore,
  218. 7:13the rule too is finding your domain and
  219. 7:15excelling at it. You need to find
  220. 7:17something that you like or you're good
  221. 7:20at. If you have ADHD, you should not
  222. 7:22only think about the conventional path
  223. 7:24that everyone suggests. You need to
  224. 7:26focus on the thing that you love that
  225. 7:28you cannot stop thinking about because
  226. 7:29I'm sure there is something and
  227. 7:31following a career might be a high-risk
  228. 7:33thing, right? That's true. But this is
  229. 7:36the only way that we can succeed. We
  230. 7:38cannot do a regular 9 toive job that you
  231. 7:41do not care about and live a mediocre
  232. 7:43life. Because with ADHD, think about it,
  233. 7:45it is the condition that you have. Our
  234. 7:47dopamine receptors are different. The
  235. 7:48amount of dopamine that is in our brain
  236. 7:50is different. There's something that
  237. 7:52what people call a normal life going to
  238. 7:54a job that they do not like does not
  239. 7:56work for us because if it worked then it
  240. 7:59would not be called ADHD. It would not
  241. 8:01be such a big issue that they would
  242. 8:02diagnose you. So you have to find your
  243. 8:05domain and excel at it. For example, me
  244. 8:07since I was a kid, I thought I'm going
  245. 8:08to be a doctor. I I studied basically
  246. 8:10like as long as I can remember as a kid
  247. 8:13because I was such a competitive kid
  248. 8:15that I did not want to lose towards
  249. 8:17anyone else that studying became my
  250. 8:19dopamine source that I got really good
  251. 8:21at it that I got into the best high
  252. 8:23school in Turkey, right? And after that,
  253. 8:25even though I battled with depression
  254. 8:27and I battled with like a lot of mental
  255. 8:30issues, I still maintained pretty good
  256. 8:31grades. And after that, I got into
  257. 8:34medical schools multiple times because I
  258. 8:36could not pick. So I kept switching and
  259. 8:37I got into all medical [laughter]
  260. 8:39schools that I applied. But I realized
  261. 8:41that medical school is not something
  262. 8:42that I'm actually passionate about. The
  263. 8:44only reason that I wanted it was it was
  264. 8:46the top, you know, career choice that I
  265. 8:48could make that I could prove the world
  266. 8:50that I am intelligent and I'm capable. I
  267. 8:53was that competitive. I was toxic as
  268. 8:55hell. But that was the environment that
  269. 8:56I grew up. Okay. But even though I got
  270. 8:58into a medical school, I got actually
  271. 9:00into the University of Rome medical
  272. 9:02school, which is a good one. I could not
  273. 9:04go. I could not continue because I'm not
  274. 9:06interested. Even though I spent all the
  275. 9:08years of my life from childhood since I
  276. 9:11was five, I was saying that I'm going to
  277. 9:12be a doctor. I could not go because I'm
  278. 9:15not interested in the materials of the
  279. 9:17medical school. I'm not I realize I'm
  280. 9:19not interested become in becoming a
  281. 9:21doctor. I'm not interested in becoming a
  282. 9:23physician, right? Practicing every day.
  283. 9:25Even though I'm interested in science
  284. 9:27and neuroscience and our body, I'm not
  285. 9:30necessarily interested in that
  286. 9:31structure. Therefore, no matter how hard
  287. 9:33I would try, I could not go because it's
  288. 9:36not my domain. It's not something that I
  289. 9:37want to excel at. It's not something
  290. 9:38that I'm interested in. But for example,
  291. 9:40this YouTube channel since from the age
  292. 9:4215, I tried for 5 years and I kept
  293. 9:44failing and failing and failing that
  294. 9:46everybody made fun of me in high school,
  295. 9:48but I was still obsessed every single
  296. 9:50day. I was thinking about YouTube like
  297. 9:51for 5 years. Who can do that? I've
  298. 9:54coached like hundreds of people to grow
  299. 9:56their YouTube channel and nobody was
  300. 9:57able to do that except like few people
  301. 9:59that were really obsessed with it. If
  302. 10:01you're not obsessed at something, you're
  303. 10:03not going to get exceptional results
  304. 10:04because you are competing with other
  305. 10:06obsessed people. But with YouTube,
  306. 10:08because I was obsessed, even after 5
  307. 10:10years of failing, I kept going that on
  308. 10:12the fifth year, we went from 0 to 100K
  309. 10:15subscribers in only 3 months. And from
  310. 10:17there, in within like 2 years, we
  311. 10:19reached 1 million subscribers and now we
  312. 10:21are at almost 1.5. And I am living my
  313. 10:24best life. Literally my whole goal was
  314. 10:26to become a YouTuber and I became one.
  315. 10:28It was because I was obsessed.
  316. 10:29Obviously, my looks probably helped, but
  317. 10:31during the 5 years that I failed, I
  318. 10:33looked the same. But it didn't it didn't
  319. 10:36really help. But the only reason I was
  320. 10:38able to keep going was it's because I
  321. 10:39was obsessed with YouTube. And that is
  322. 10:41the only way that you can excel at
  323. 10:44something with ADHD. And the rule number
  324. 10:46three is that you have to be in
  325. 10:48environment this is rewarded. This
  326. 10:50obsession is not going to be rewarded in
  327. 10:52every single job scenario because
  328. 10:54traditional settings punish everything
  329. 10:56about how we work. They want you to
  330. 10:58follow the process. consistent
  331. 10:59deadlines, be predictable, sit in
  332. 11:01meetings, do the same tasks in the same
  333. 11:03way every day, but we'd like to find a
  334. 11:06new ways. We are we our head is, you
  335. 11:09know, my head there are like 200 ideas
  336. 11:11that I could right now give about video
  337. 11:13ideas and business ideas that I could
  338. 11:14give to you. But traditional settings do
  339. 11:16not reward this. And if you are in a
  340. 11:18career, even when you're obsessed with
  341. 11:20it, if it does not reward you, then that
  342. 11:23life is not designed for you and you're
  343. 11:24not going to be able to successful in
  344. 11:26societal terms. You need an environment
  345. 11:28where creativity is valued, where
  346. 11:30nonlinear thinking is an advantage, and
  347. 11:32where chaos is acceptable, where you are
  348. 11:34not measured by how well you follow the
  349. 11:36rules, but what you produce. This is why
  350. 11:38actually so many entrepreneurs have
  351. 11:40ADHD. Not because we are business
  352. 11:42geniuses, but because entrepreneurship
  353. 11:44is constant variation, constant novelty,
  354. 11:47constant ups and downs. It is never the
  355. 11:49same day twice. It's high risk, high
  356. 11:51reward. It is never boring, and we need
  357. 11:53that. Like Richard Branson has ADHD and
  358. 11:55built an empire of companies. The
  359. 11:57Spotify CEO has talked about how he
  360. 11:59works with total obsession on whatever
  361. 12:01he commits to. These people did not
  362. 12:03succeed despite ADHD. They succeed
  363. 12:05because they have ADHD. They succeeded
  364. 12:07because the environment they built
  365. 12:09rewarded exactly how their brain works.
  366. 12:11But it does not have to be an
  367. 12:12entrepreneurship. High pressure kitchens
  368. 12:14where every moment is different. for
  369. 12:15example, right? Journalism or creative
  370. 12:17work or research or any work with
  371. 12:20variety, autonomy and dopamine
  372. 12:22generating challenge is for us. So if
  373. 12:24your b work bores you, you will fail.
  374. 12:27Doesn't mean that every single second of
  375. 12:28your work is going to be exciting. No.
  376. 12:30But majority of the time it has to be
  377. 12:33fun for you. You might think, oh, I mean
  378. 12:34that is the common advice of follow your
  379. 12:36passion, right? It's not necessarily
  380. 12:39follow your passion. It's more about
  381. 12:40follow your obsession. And obviously it
  382. 12:43applies for most people but most people
  383. 12:45are not obsessed as we are. That is the
  384. 12:48differentiation because when we are
  385. 12:49obsessed it's almost scary because when
  386. 12:51I was growing my YouTube channel I was
  387. 12:53posting three times a week for one and a
  388. 12:56half years and consecutive. And during
  389. 12:57that time I did not see anyone. I did
  390. 12:59not hang out with anyone. I did not talk
  391. 13:01anything about anything other than
  392. 13:03YouTube. My mom was so concerned that
  393. 13:05she thought I went crazy. That is the
  394. 13:08thing we need to succeed in this world.
  395. 13:09And normal people do not have that and
  396. 13:11we do have it. Therefore, it's all about
  397. 13:14finding the thing and pointing out that
  398. 13:16energy there and forgetting all about
  399. 13:18your weaknesses because the moments you
  400. 13:20succeed, everyone is going to accept
  401. 13:22that. So, stop wasting your energy
  402. 13:24trying to eliminate things that are
  403. 13:25never going away because every drop of
  404. 13:27energy you spend fighting your
  405. 13:29weaknesses is energy you're not spending
  406. 13:31on your strength. With ADHD, what we
  407. 13:33need to do is not covering our covering
  408. 13:35our weaknesses and become a mediocre or
  409. 13:37below mediocre, but maximize on our
  410. 13:40strengths so that we become exceptional.
  411. 13:41Because with ADHD, the thing is that you
  412. 13:43are never an allrounder. Most of the
  413. 13:45ADHD people that I've seen in my life,
  414. 13:47and I have so many around, me because
  415. 13:49I'm an ADHD magnet for some reason, is
  416. 13:51that a lot of people do suck at majority
  417. 13:54of the things, but there is one thing
  418. 13:56that they are very good at. And the
  419. 13:57successful people are the people who
  420. 13:59maximize on that thing. maximize on
  421. 14:01their strength that they are exceptional
  422. 14:03compared to other people. But when you
  423. 14:05look into their personal life, they suck
  424. 14:07at normal life. They can do their bills,
  425. 14:09they can do their taxes, they can do
  426. 14:10their dishes. Their normal life is
  427. 14:12chaos, but they're so exceptional at
  428. 14:14that one thing that society actually
  429. 14:16forgives them. And that is the truth
  430. 14:18number two that you need to know.
  431. 14:20Success is actually our ticket to
  432. 14:22freedom. This is the part that nobody
  433. 14:24wants to hear. But this is the truth.
  434. 14:26The only way to be accepted for us to
  435. 14:28being different is to be undeniably
  436. 14:31successful at something and serving the
  437. 14:33society. Look at the old historical
  438. 14:35figures. When you look at Leonardo da
  439. 14:37Vinci or Einstein, they are all kind of
  440. 14:39like weirdos. They had very weird traits
  441. 14:41or very weird preferences and the way
  442. 14:44that they lived and it was so chaotic.
  443. 14:46But society accepted them because they
  444. 14:48were successful. All successful
  445. 14:50historical figures are kind of the
  446. 14:52extremes and weirdos. And when I was a
  447. 14:54kid, I literally could not like sit in
  448. 14:56the class, you know? I could just not
  449. 14:58like focus. I would walk around the
  450. 14:59classroom while teacher was talking. And
  451. 15:02you know what? As long as my grades were
  452. 15:03good, the teachers were fine with it.
  453. 15:05They would say like, "Oh, Rory just like
  454. 15:06needs that. She she does it and she
  455. 15:08doesn't bother anyone, so let her walk."
  456. 15:10But the moment my grades dropped, it
  457. 15:12suddenly became a problem. Suddenly, I
  458. 15:14need to get it together and I need to
  459. 15:16behave correctly. And my mom told me
  460. 15:18this when I was a kid. That stuck me
  461. 15:20with forever. Because you are weird. You
  462. 15:22have to be successful, Rudy. She
  463. 15:24explained that if you're a little bit
  464. 15:25weird, people will always tell you to
  465. 15:27change your behaviors. But if you're
  466. 15:29extremely weird, so weird you're not
  467. 15:31even on the scale anymore and you're
  468. 15:32successful, people accept it as a quirky
  469. 15:35part of you. And that makes it unique
  470. 15:37from other people's perspective. But as
  471. 15:39long as you are successful, if you're
  472. 15:41not successful and if you're a little
  473. 15:42bit weird, then you're going to be
  474. 15:44lonely. You're going to be pushed away
  475. 15:45from society. And that is the reality in
  476. 15:47our life. Society operates on
  477. 15:49meritocracy, whether we like it or not.
  478. 15:51When your ability is high, everything is
  479. 15:54tolerated. Your quirk becomes your
  480. 15:56genius traits. What makes you unique?
  481. 15:58Your chaos becomes a creative process.
  482. 15:59Your impulsivity becomes visionary
  483. 16:01leadership. But when your ability is
  484. 16:03low, nothing is tolerated. The same
  485. 16:06traits that would be celebrated get
  486. 16:08labeled as irresponsible, unreliable,
  487. 16:10scattered, difficult. And you will never
  488. 16:12fit in. You will always be an outlier.
  489. 16:14Because that is a definition of ADHD. If
  490. 16:16two and 3% of people of the population
  491. 16:19have it, then it means that 97 98% of
  492. 16:22the population do not have it.
  493. 16:23Therefore, they do not operate like you.
  494. 16:25Therefore, they do not think like you.
  495. 16:27So, you are going to be weird because we
  496. 16:29are the minority. But success buys you
  497. 16:31the freedom to be yourselves without
  498. 16:33constantly justifying your existence.
  499. 16:35Because as long as you're successful,
  500. 16:36people are going to accept it and even
  501. 16:39cherish it. This is not fair obviously,
  502. 16:41but understanding is a power. So mindset
  503. 16:44three is that you're playing a different
  504. 16:45game. Not a worse game compared to other
  505. 16:47people but the life of a game that we
  506. 16:49play is [music] a different one which is
  507. 16:52a high-risisk highreward game. The highs
  508. 16:54with ADHD are very high but the lows are
  509. 16:56very very low indeed. There's no
  510. 16:58peaceful middle ground because your
  511. 17:00brain does not do middle ground. It's
  512. 17:01either zero or max. I never seen an ADHD
  513. 17:04person live a mediocre life. They're
  514. 17:06either very successful or they're doing
  515. 17:08very poorly or even though they're doing
  516. 17:10well, they think they are doing very
  517. 17:12poorly because of that all or nothing
  518. 17:14attitude. And you cannot play the rules
  519. 17:16that were designed for neurotypical
  520. 17:18people. Their game is consistency,
  521. 17:20routine, slow and steady progress. But
  522. 17:22our game is obsession, intensity, and
  523. 17:25all or nothing. The sooner you accept
  524. 17:27this is your game, the sooner you can
  525. 17:28start playing with it instead of trying
  526. 17:30to play someone else's. If you're
  527. 17:32sitting here and thinking, "This is
  528. 17:33great, but I have no idea what my thing
  529. 17:35is. I do not have a passion. I don't
  530. 17:37know what I'm good at, or I'm not really
  531. 17:39obsessed with anything." Probably
  532. 17:40because you haven't tried enough things.
  533. 17:42If you tried all the different things,
  534. 17:44you're going to be able to get good at
  535. 17:46finding your obsession. Because I
  536. 17:47actually tried every single thing that I
  537. 17:49can try think of. Like I literally
  538. 17:51played the flute for a while. Played the
  539. 17:53piano, played the Japanese like okoto,
  540. 17:56which is like a traditional kind of like
  541. 17:58an instrument. I did cheerleading,
  542. 18:00dance, which I sucked at. I tried
  543. 18:02badminton volleyball. I swam. I, you
  544. 18:06know, like tried every single thing that
  545. 18:08you can think of. And now I am obsessed
  546. 18:10with golf, by the way. But the more
  547. 18:12things you try, the more you will learn
  548. 18:14about yourself, your abilities, your
  549. 18:15weaknesses, and your strengths. If you
  550. 18:17cannot right now tell me the three
  551. 18:18things that you're exceptionally good at
  552. 18:20and three things you're exceptionally
  553. 18:22bad at, it means that you don't know
  554. 18:23yourself enough, which means you need to
  555. 18:26explore more things. Because every new
  556. 18:28thing you try is another chance for your
  557. 18:30brain to say this is it. This one that
  558. 18:33turns on the switch. Try creative work.
  559. 18:35Try building something. Try your sport.
  560. 18:36Try a skill. Try starting a project
  561. 18:38online. Try something that scares you.
  562. 18:40The thing about ADHD is that when you
  563. 18:42find it, you will know because zero will
  564. 18:45become Max overnight. It will consume
  565. 18:48all the energy, all the attention that
  566. 18:50you'll have that it is going to be
  567. 18:52undeniable that you're going to be
  568. 18:54obsessed with it, that you're obsessed
  569. 18:55with it. then do not giving the research
  570. 18:57up. Okay, the search itself is not a
  571. 18:59failure. Giving up on the search is a
  572. 19:01failure. So the moment that your energy
  573. 19:03shifts into something and your attention
  574. 19:05shifts to something, do not feel bad
  575. 19:07about it. It is exactly what you needed
  576. 19:09because if you have ADHD, I know you had
  577. 19:1110 different hobbies that you tried and
  578. 19:13that you abandoned, but it is the
  579. 19:15search. That is what our life looks
  580. 19:17like. Do not feel bad about it. Our
  581. 19:20existence is only truly accepted through
  582. 19:22success. Okay, remember that. That
  583. 19:24sounds harsh. I know. And I think that
  584. 19:26it is very sad sometimes that I
  585. 19:28sometimes think that if I'm not
  586. 19:29successful, I'm just going to be treated
  587. 19:31as a incapable adult being because I
  588. 19:34suck at everything else other than
  589. 19:37YouTube and business. I'm really bad at
  590. 19:39it, but that is the truth. But it is
  591. 19:41also free because it means you're not
  592. 19:42chasing success for the same reason
  593. 19:44everyone else is. They want the
  594. 19:46validation. They want they want to flex.
  595. 19:48But what we want is freedom. What we
  596. 19:50want is to be accepted in society. We
  597. 19:53want a peace in society. The freedom to
  598. 19:55work the way your brain works. The
  599. 19:57freedom to live life on your terms. The
  600. 19:59freedom to stop pretending like who you
  601. 20:02are not because of people's
  602. 20:04expectations. And the best news is that
  603. 20:06we are living in the single best era for
  604. 20:08ADHD brains. The internet has
  605. 20:10democratized everything. Knowledge,
  606. 20:11opportunities, audiences, income. Like
  607. 20:14for example, English is not even my
  608. 20:15first language. I didn't even go to an
  609. 20:17international school. Yet here I am
  610. 20:19communicating with you on my third
  611. 20:21language. I did not even live in the US
  612. 20:23yet. You're watching this video and
  613. 20:24we're communicating and remote work is
  614. 20:26normalizing different ways of working.
  615. 20:28The creator economy rewards exactly what
  616. 20:30we are good at. The gap between us and
  617. 20:32neurotypicals is actually shrinking
  618. 20:34because attention spans across the board
  619. 20:36are getting worse which means our way of
  620. 20:38working. Nonlinear creative flexible
  621. 20:41intents is becoming more valuable less
  622. 20:43because their attention span is
  623. 20:44shrinking but they're not getting good
  624. 20:46at creativity. Whereas ours is good and
  625. 20:49our attention span is bad. You need to
  626. 20:51stop playing their game and start
  627. 20:52playing yours first. Find what makes you
  628. 20:55hyperfocused. Find what makes you
  629. 20:56curious. Find what you can do for hours
  630. 20:58and lose track of time. That is your
  631. 21:00signal and chase it. Except that you
  632. 21:02will forget things. You will be late.
  633. 21:04You will struggle with basic tasks.
  634. 21:06Design around it. I have many videos
  635. 21:09showing how you can design a life around
  636. 21:11it. How you can manage your life, how
  637. 21:13you can manage your to-do list, how you
  638. 21:14can manage your organization, etc. More
  639. 21:16videos are coming, right? Like get
  640. 21:18support. My mom left Japan 40 years ago
  641. 21:20because she knew society was not
  642. 21:22designed for her personality. My mom
  643. 21:23also has ADHD by the way and she married
  644. 21:25a foreigner. My dad moved to a different
  645. 21:28country and built a completely different
  646. 21:29life. Think about it. And it happened
  647. 21:31like 40 years ago where international
  648. 21:33marriage was not that common in Japan,
  649. 21:34neither Turkey. But she gave me the
  650. 21:36permission to be different from the
  651. 21:38moment that I was born because I was
  652. 21:40different. And that is the greatest gift
  653. 21:42that she could give to me. And if your
  654. 21:44parents didn't give that to you, now
  655. 21:45it's your time to give it to yourself. I
  656. 21:48know it is hard but you have to remember
  657. 21:50that we are built for obsession, for
  658. 21:52pattern recognition, for connecting dots
  659. 21:54others cannot see, for hyperfocus, for
  660. 21:56all or nothing. The biggest lie you have
  661. 21:58been told is that you need to fix
  662. 21:59yourself to succeed. The truth is the
  663. 22:01opposite. You need to stop fixing and
  664. 22:03start building the way you work. That is
  665. 22:05how you get successful. A life that
  666. 22:07works with your brain and not against
  667. 22:09it. Because when an ADT brain finds the
  668. 22:11right domain, points it obsession in the
  669. 22:13right direction, and goes to max,
  670. 22:15there's almost nothing in the world that
  671. 22:17can compete with that. So stop fixing
  672. 22:18and start building. And if you want to
  673. 22:20learn how you can manage your life
  674. 22:22despite living with ADHD and maximize
  675. 22:24your productivity and get more things
  676. 22:26done so that you can focus on that
  677. 22:28signal, then watch this video Next.

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