How to Make Any Hard Decision With Two Questions — Transcript

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1. 0:00Hi, Alex. In earlier stream, you said
2. 0:01that when torn between a hard and easy
3. 0:03choice, to always pick the hard choice
4. 0:04because if the easy choice is right, we
5. 0:06would have already picked it. What is
6. 0:07the framework you use for assessing
7. 0:08between two hard choices?
8. 0:10Really good question.
9. 0:12Um
10. 0:13I think it actually comes down to goal
11. 0:16optimization. So, what do I want to have
12. 0:18happen? And so, uh the two most common
13. 0:21questions that I will ask in the
14. 0:22scenarios when I have these two hard
15. 0:24things is what do I want to have happen
16. 0:25and what problem am I solving? And this
17. 0:28is super helpful because a lot of times
18. 0:29let's say it's a hard conversation.
19. 0:31You're thinking about how you're going
20. 0:32to have a hard conversation. Well, when
21. 0:33you think okay, well, I I this guy is
22. 0:35sucking. Uh I want to let him know that
23. 0:37he's sucking. But, that's that's not
24. 0:38actually what you want to have happen.
25. 0:39You want him to improve. And so, if you
26. 0:41thought, well, how do I improve this
27. 0:42guy's behavior? Do I think that me
28. 0:44yelling at him is going to do that?
29. 0:45Probably not. It'll probably make him
30. 0:46feel bad. And so, when you think about
31. 0:47we want to have happen, it ultimately
32. 0:49changes your behavior in the in the
33. 0:50present that like dramatically improves
34. 0:55your outcomes. And this is a really
35. 0:56tough one for a lot of people because
36. 0:57most people have these they want to just
37. 0:59show up and drop they just want to vomit
38. 1:00their emotions on somebody else because
39. 1:02they feel bad in the moment and because
40. 1:03of that discomfort, they feel this huge
41. 1:05catalyst for action this that their
42. 1:07action threshold gets decreased. So,
43. 1:08they just want to do a lot of stuff cuz
44. 1:09they want to not feel the way they feel.
45. 1:11But, the fact that you want to do stuff
46. 1:12has absolutely no correlation to whether
47. 1:14those actions are actually going to
48. 1:15yield the result that you want. And so,
49. 1:16being able to very clearly say, "This is
50. 1:17what I want to have happen and I believe
51. 1:19these actions are going to be the things
52. 1:20that have the highest likelihood of
53. 1:21making that happen."
54. 1:22Um
55. 1:23just simply adding those two filters
56. 1:25prior to taking my action has just saved
57. 1:27me so much time and made me so much
58. 1:30money in my life. And the reason it's so
59. 1:32difficult is because you have to
60. 1:33literally pause when you have the
61. 1:34emotions and say, "I know I want to do
62. 1:36something. Is the thing that I want to
63. 1:38do the thing that I should do to get the
64. 1:40thing that I want?" And almost always it
65. 1:42isn't. So, that is how I approach two
66. 1:45hard problems when I don't actually uh
67. 1:47obviously I don't know your specific
68. 1:48situation. Um that is almost always how
69. 1:51I approach it is like, "Does which of
70. 1:52these gets me closest to I want what I
71. 1:54want?" If you like this video and you're
72. 1:56a owner who wants to break through your
73. 1:57current revenue ceiling, I distilled
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75. 2:00past 10 million and three businesses
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83. 2:14enjoy.