How to Become a Storytelling Genius — Transcript

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1. 0:00How much would you pay for this candle?
2. 0:03$1. $1?
3. 0:05>> [laughter]
4. 0:06>> What else do we have? $1.
5. 0:09Made of gold, if it's made of gold.
6. 0:13Now, let me give you some context to
7. 0:15this candle. This candle used to belong
8. 0:17to this woman whose husband was in the
9. 0:19hospital, and every night she was right
10. 0:21at the hospital bed, and right before
11. 0:23she went to bed, she lit the candle, and
12. 0:25she just sent a little prayer. And that
13. 0:27thing was actually the only thing that
14. 0:29gave her some hope during that time.
15. 0:31Now, how much is this candle worth to
16. 0:33you now?
17. 0:34This is what two journalists in the US
18. 0:37wanted to find out. And so, what they
19. 0:39did, they went to a bunch of garage
20. 0:42sales in the US, and they bought 100
21. 0:44used items. Items that you find
22. 0:46everywhere in the house, right? It could
23. 0:47be a candle, [music]
24. 0:48a nutcracker, a jar of marbles, garbage.
25. 0:51All of us have this. But then they did
26. 0:52something fascinating. [music] They
27. 0:54invited a bunch of volunteers to write
28. 0:56short fictional stories about those
29. 0:58items.
30. 0:58>> [music]
31. 0:59>> Now, then they put on eBay. Initially,
32. 1:01they paid $129 for the 100 items. How
33. 1:04much do you think they were sold for?
34. 1:05$5,000. $5,000? Yes, what else?
35. 1:10$12,000. From 129 to 12,000. Okay.
36. 1:13They were sold for $3,613,
37. 1:16which is a 2,700% [music]
38. 1:19increase in value. And why? Because of
39. 1:21those fictional stories. Now, if you
40. 1:24want to increase the value of your
41. 1:25ideas, of your product, of yourself,
42. 1:28well, start sharing more and more of
43. 1:29those stories. Now, you already know how
44. 1:31to tell good stories, but a lot of you
45. 1:33might still be wondering, "Hey,
46. 1:35I'm just not this natural-born
47. 1:37storyteller, right? How can I get good
48. 1:38at that?" Now, after coaching thousands
49. 1:40of people on storytelling, I realized
50. 1:42that it comes down to four core
51. 1:44exercises. That if you do those four
52. 1:46core exercises every single day for the
53. 1:48next 30 days, your stories will be
54. 1:50unrecognizable. You'll be definitely in
55. 1:52the top 1% of storytellers. Let's start
56. 1:54with the first exercise or habit.
57. 1:56Imagine two people, Sarah and John.
58. 1:59Exactly the same routine. Every day they
59. 2:01get up, they get their coffee, they get
60. 2:02to work. That's it. But Sarah, she on
61. 2:06her way to work she's just scrolling
62. 2:07through her phone. She drinks a coffee
63. 2:08but doesn't really take it in and
64. 2:09arrives at work. John on the other hand,
65. 2:12he goes to the coffee shop. There he
66. 2:14recognizes the barista's smile. Then he
67. 2:16drinks the coffee and is like,
68. 2:18"Ah, so delicious." And when he arrives
69. 2:20at work, he sees also his co-worker's
70. 2:22proud face because he did this project
71. 2:24right. Two different people, same
72. 2:26routine, a different level of awareness.
73. 2:28Quick show of hands, who here identifies
74. 2:30more as Sarah?
75. 2:32Who here identifies more as John?
76. 2:34Is it somewhere in the middle? Okay. I
77. 2:36to be honest, I used to or still today
78. 2:38often walk through life like like the
79. 2:41Sarah, right? Just on autopilot, but not
80. 2:43taking things in. The first habit to
81. 2:46become a master storyteller is
82. 2:48to notice.
83. 2:50And for that
84. 2:52I don't mean any big stories, right? You
85. 2:53don't need to have some dramatic,
86. 2:55life-changing stories. It is about
87. 2:56noticing those small moments that happen
88. 2:59every single day. One exercise that you
89. 3:01can do to do that is an exercise called
90. 3:03homework for life from Matthew Dicks.
91. 3:05How does it work? Every single day you
92. 3:07sit down and you ask yourself, "Hmm,
93. 3:09if I had to tell a story from today,
94. 3:12what would be that one moment that stood
95. 3:14out? That one moment that touched my
96. 3:15heart? Maybe it was this interesting
97. 3:17conversation. Maybe it was a
98. 3:19realization. Maybe it was something that
99. 3:20really hurt in that moment. But what was
100. 3:22that one moment that stood out?" So for
101. 3:24example, my moment yesterday was I went
102. 3:27to singing class and I felt so
103. 3:30embarrassed because when I watched the
104. 3:31recording of myself, it was just so
105. 3:33terrible. I was so off pitch. And so
106. 3:34that was my moment yesterday. And so
107. 3:36what I did, I just wrote down the date
108. 3:39and that story-worthy moment. That's it.
109. 3:41That's the first habit. Now in case
110. 3:43you're wondering, what is happening? At
111. 3:44first it might be a little bit boring,
112. 3:45right? It's like, "Okay, today I had
113. 3:47cereal for breakfast." But after a
114. 3:49while, once you do that more and more,
115. 3:50you start to see everywhere there's
116. 3:52moments, there's moments. And all of
117. 3:54those moments could be turned into some
118. 3:56beautiful stories. Noticing that moment
119. 3:59is obviously great, right? You want to
120. 4:00notice that, do that every single day
121. 4:02and note down the date and that story
122. 4:03worthy moment. But that's not enough
123. 4:05because that's when you actually move
124. 4:06into the second habit and that is to
125. 4:09improvise a story. Now, if you just keep
126. 4:11that moment out there, well, you're
127. 4:13obviously not going to improve. And so,
128. 4:15what you want to do is you want to take
129. 4:16this moment and make up a full story
130. 4:18around that moment. So, for example, if
131. 4:20I take my moment which was, "Hey,
132. 4:22feeling embarrassed after the singing
133. 4:23class." I would then improvise a story
134. 4:25on the spot. I can do this right now.
135. 4:26So, yesterday I went to singing class
136. 4:29and at one point I had this brilliant
137. 4:30idea and I tell my teacher, um hey, do
138. 4:32you know what would be really cool? If
139. 4:34we recorded the session. I can put it on
140. 4:36social media. People can see my
141. 4:38beautiful voice. He's like, "Yeah, sure,
142. 4:40let's do it." We record the session.
143. 4:42After that, I look at the recording. I
144. 4:45think, "This this is terrible. This is
145. 4:47the worst thing that I've ever seen in
146. 4:49my life. I was just off [music] pitch
147. 4:50all the time." And at first I felt so
148. 4:52embarrassed, but then I thought, "You
149. 4:54know what? This is awesome because I
150. 4:55know eventually I will be good at that
151. 4:57stuff." [music] And then I have
152. 4:59something to compare with.
153. 5:00And then it was okay to suck for that
154. 5:02one moment. Anyhow, this was my moment
155. 5:04right now, right? Now, could I tell a
156. 5:06more polished version of that story?
157. 5:08100%, but improv is all about okay, just
158. 5:10making up a story on the spot. Not
159. 5:12making it up, but improvising a story on
160. 5:14the spot.
161. 5:15So, that's the second one. It's
162. 5:16improvise. [music]
163. 5:18And what I would suggest when you
164. 5:19improvise, at the start, just improvise,
165. 5:22period. But once you do that a few
166. 5:23times, try to play with that. So, one
167. 5:25time you improvise and bring in so much
168. 5:27emotions. Someone's like, "I want to
169. 5:28make them cry." Another time maybe you
170. 5:30work a little bit on your vocal variety,
171. 5:32so you speed up in one point, you slow
172. 5:34down in another one. So, improvising
173. 5:36helps you to try out all those different
174. 5:38things.
175. 5:38>> [music]
176. 5:38>> It's absolutely beautiful. That's the
177. 5:40second habit. Let's now talk about the
178. 5:42third habit. And that one is it's
179. 5:45already getting a little bit harder
180. 5:46because obviously this is you on your
181. 5:48couch. This is still you on your couch.
182. 5:51So, why do we take it? Well, that's when
183. 5:53we go to the third habit. There's one
184. 5:55single question that we get asked every
185. 5:57single day. What is that question? How
186. 6:00are you? How are you? Yes. What do
187. 6:02people usually respond there? I'm good.
188. 6:04I'm good.
189. 6:05I'm good. Yeah. Well, sometimes they
190. 6:06say, "How are you?" Oh, yeah, good.
191. 6:08Finally, it's not raining anymore. And
192. 6:10so, we talk about all those those
193. 6:13average standard weather talk, traffic,
194. 6:15and it's terrible. We spend years of our
195. 6:18lives talking about those things, and
196. 6:19they just go absolutely nowhere.
197. 6:22And so, what you want to do in those
198. 6:23moments is share a short personal story,
199. 6:26something that shows a little bit more
200. 6:28about you as a human, anytime that
201. 6:30someone asks you, "How are you?" For
202. 6:32example, if someone were to ask me
203. 6:33today, "Hey, how are you?" I'd respond
204. 6:34like this. I'd say, "Um I'm good. Well,
205. 6:36yesterday I had a very embarrassing
206. 6:37moment. Yesterday, I was at singing
207. 6:40class, and when I saw the recording of
208. 6:43that singing, man, it was so bad. I felt
209. 6:45so ashamed." Anyway,
210. 6:47um what about you? When was the last
211. 6:48time you messed it up a little bit more
212. 6:51of you felt very awkward about
213. 6:52something?
214. 6:54And then I would bring it back to the
215. 6:55other person. Now, did you see? Could I
216. 6:57tell a better story? 100% But, those
217. 7:00stories, they're not necessary to tell
218. 7:02the most biggest, most majestic story.
219. 7:05It's just to share something tiny to
220. 7:07build this connection and to get more
221. 7:09reps in. That's the third habit, and
222. 7:11that is to
223. 7:13tell connection stories.
224. 7:15And so, anytime that someone asks you,
225. 7:17"How are you?" share the short personal
226. 7:20story. And you'll see, after you do that
227. 7:22a while, you'll build completely
228. 7:24different relationships. But, there are
229. 7:26different things to watch out for. One,
230. 7:28keep it short. There is the time for
231. 7:30longer stories, where you share like a
232. 7:321-minute story, 2-minute story, but not
233. 7:34here. [music] If someone asks you, "How
234. 7:35are you?" and you're like, "Do do do
235. 7:36do." you just share the entire life
236. 7:37story, obviously this is too much. And
237. 7:39so, you want to keep those stories 30
238. 7:41seconds ideally, maybe 60 seconds if
239. 7:44it's incredible story.
240. 7:45The second thing that you want to do is
241. 7:47ask a question at the end. So, don't
242. 7:49just share your story, but you ask them,
243. 7:51"Hey, what about you? When was the last
244. 7:52time that you messed [music] up big
245. 7:53time?" Or, "When was the last time that
246. 7:55you felt very awkward about something?"
247. 7:57And so, you bring it back to them
248. 7:58because then they'll be like, "Ah, yeah,
249. 8:00yeah, yeah. 2 weeks ago I was at
250. 8:01dinner." And then they [music] will
251. 8:02share a story in in return. And so, then
252. 8:04it feels much more natural, becomes this
253. 8:06conversation. And I know for a lot of
254. 8:08people this seems completely uh crazy,
255. 8:11right? Uh especially for the more
256. 8:12introverted people. When I first heard
257. 8:14about that idea, I thought, "Geez, I'm
258. 8:16sharing a story unsolicited? That's
259. 8:18madness, right? Why would I ever do
260. 8:20this?"
261. 8:21There I would encourage you to all
262. 8:22gather your own data points, right? It's
263. 8:24so easy. All of you will be asked every
264. 8:26single day so many times, "How are you?"
265. 8:28And then just choose to respond with
266. 8:31something more interesting, something
267. 8:32more personal. And then try that out for
268. 8:35a week. And after that you're like,
269. 8:36"Hmm, damn. My conversations really
270. 8:38became so much better, became so much
271. 8:40better as a storyteller." Or, you hate
272. 8:42it and you send me an angry email after
273. 8:43that, which is also cool. But gather
274. 8:46your own data points. Step one to three,
275. 8:49they work really well to hone the skill
276. 8:51of improvisation, to get more
277. 8:52comfortable speaking in front of others,
278. 8:54but there's one final step, one final
279. 8:56habit that is still missing. And that
280. 8:58one is story bank.
281. 9:01I don't know about you, but my memory
282. 9:04it's not that great. Like, I forget my
283. 9:06stories in a week from now, right? I
284. 9:08think in this moment, "Ah, this is a
285. 9:10beautiful story. I'll remember this for
286. 9:11the rest of my life." And then 2 days
287. 9:12later it's gone. And so,
288. 9:14>> [music]
289. 9:14>> if you want to become a master
290. 9:15storyteller, you can't just leave it to
291. 9:17chance to hope that your brain will
292. 9:20remember that story. So, what you want
293. 9:21to do is build your story bank. A story
294. 9:24bank is the central place where you save
295. 9:27your stories, where you classify them,
296. 9:30where you categorize them as well.
297. 9:32And so, what do you put in there? Pretty
298. 9:34much any moment that stood out, any
299. 9:35moment where you're like, "Hmm, this
300. 9:36could be potentially interesting." You
301. 9:38put into the story bank.
302. 9:39>> [music]
303. 9:39>> And what is the stuff that you usually
304. 9:41want to include in there? I capture
305. 9:42usually the name of the story, then also
306. 9:45the use case of that story, the point of
307. 9:48the story, a summary of the story, a
308. 9:50rating, and that's pretty much it.
309. 9:52That's it. Now, if you're case you're
310. 9:53wondering, "Hey, what can I use?" Well,
311. 9:55for most of you will probably use some
312. 9:56electronic versions, so Notion, Google
313. 9:58Docs, Evernote, all that stuff works. If
314. 10:00you're a little bit more like dinosaur
315. 10:02and you're like, "I I love journals."
316. 10:04Well, then use a journal. Use whatever
317. 10:06tool creates the least friction for you.
318. 10:08That's a story bank. And once you do
319. 10:10that more and more, well, you have then
320. 10:12this archive of stories. Because,
321. 10:13[music]
322. 10:14hey, if you want to become a great
323. 10:15storyteller, you can't just have like
324. 10:17two or three stories. You want to have
325. 10:1910, 20, 30, 40, 50 stories. Because then
326. 10:22you can pull out those stories at really
327. 10:24any chance. So, if you stick to those
328. 10:26four habits, and you just do them every
329. 10:29single day, and they take less than 10
330. 10:30minutes, you'll tell better stories than
331. 10:32any other person out there, guaranteed.
332. 10:33And it only [music] takes like 30 days
333. 10:35of this. But do this, I still do that
334. 10:37stuff every single day, because it's so
335. 10:38powerful.