How to be POPE in 55 Years #4k #history — Transcript

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1. 0:00Here's how to guarantee to become a pope
2. 0:01in about 55 years. First, you have to be
3. 0:04born a man. So, that eliminates about
4. 0:0650% of your chances. Sorry, ladies. Next
5. 0:08up, you need to get baptized as a
6. 0:10Catholic. Getting baptized usually takes
7. 0:11about 1 to 2 years, as you need to learn
8. 0:13Catholic history, theology, and
9. 0:15scripture. Then, when baptized, contact
10. 0:17your local bishop and ask if he will
11. 0:19sponsor you to be a priest in training.
12. 0:20If he accepts, you will have a
13. 0:22full-funded education for the next 7
14. 0:24years. After those years, you go back to
15. 0:26the bishop, pledge your full obedience
16. 0:28to him, and he will assign you to a
17. 0:29church. Kiss his hand and thank him, and
18. 0:31then aim for his job. You must appear
19. 0:33completely humble and content with being
20. 0:35a lowly parish priest for the next 20
21. 0:38years. Meanwhile, your bishop will meet
22. 0:40with his secret of his colleagues and
23. 0:41create a secret list of potential future
24. 0:43bishops. If your name as a priest is on
25. 0:45the list and the current pope approves,
26. 0:47you are the next bishop. You now manage
27. 0:49a massive region. Pledge your obedience
28. 0:51to the pope himself and secretly aim for
29. 0:54his job. To do so, you need to become a
30. 0:56cardinal, and only the pope can make you
31. 0:57one. Impress him over the next 20 years.
32. 1:00And this is it. Wait for the pope to
33. 1:01resign or die, mainly die, and meet for
34. 1:04the big vote. Of all the 120 cardinals,
35. 1:07one of them will become the next pope.
36. 1:09Now, we won't leave this all up to
37. 1:10chance, of course. So, while you were
38. 1:12spending 50 years of your life to get to
39. 1:14this point, your homies from
40. 1:15kindergarten did as well. You rig the
41. 1:17vote and you've become the next pope.
42. 1:19Let's go.