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Group Dynamics 2 — Transcript

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0:01hello and welcome um to the next um
0:04lecture of group
0:06dynamics um you'll see by the first
0:09slide here that we have um four
0:11different sections um that we're going
0:14to be talking about um some of it is a
0:17little bit of a review um some of it
0:20we're going to add some more details
0:22into how you handle um different
0:25situations and how to make different
0:27things
0:28happen um make sure sure you have your
0:31Cole um book we're going to be referring
0:33to um several things in Chapter 2 um and
0:37then early chapter 12 um it has some
0:41things that back up um what Cole says um
0:45I highly suggest that you read them both
0:48um so you can get a better understanding
0:51um you might prefer one text over the
0:54other one or between the two you can
0:57kind of come up with your own um wording
1:00um for how um some of these things make
1:03sense to you so please make sure you
1:04read them
1:07both
1:10can yeah um definite group dynamics or
1:15are all those things that influence the
1:18outcome of the group so whether it's
1:22positive or negative things that happen
1:25it's anything that happens that um can
1:29put some change or influence the outcome
1:32of the group um there is certain
1:35predictable stages um that group go
1:39through and that's called group
1:40development so we can see um there's
1:44typical predictable
1:47stages um that if you have a group over
1:50a long period of time you will see them
1:53develop through um so we'll talk about
1:56those different stages um we're also
1:58going to be talking about about um the
2:01group roles um that each member takes um
2:05you'll remember we've talked about
2:07that um the group leader needs to take
2:10on all of the roles that are not covered
2:13by um the group members so we'll talk
2:16about those roles
2:19specifically um there are some positive
2:22and negative um but there are a lot um
2:25that are there to help build and
2:27maintain the group um and then those
2:30negative ones obviously could be
2:32negatively
2:34affecting what happens so we kind of
2:38will be looking at its group Norms plus
2:41the roles um will produce um an outcome
2:46for the
2:48group um we've talked about already
2:50about the content and the process so
2:53remember content is what is said and
2:56done and the process is how you handle
2:58it what do you do with what was said and
3:02done how do you help the participants
3:06deal with what was said and done um so
3:10we've talked about the example in Cole
3:13with Dave and Hannah when Hannah refused
3:15to go out on the outing Dave got upset
3:18the rest of the group members got mad at
3:21Dave you need to be ready to deal with
3:25that you can't just let it go you know
3:28you have to deal with and figure out
3:30well why did Hannah not want to go why
3:33did Dave get so upset with Hannah why
3:36did everybody else gang up on Dave and
3:38not be upset for Hannah for not wanting
3:40to go that's that process that you need
3:44to be ready to help your clients go
3:47through so they can become better so ask
3:50you know well Dave why does this make
3:52you so upset that Hannah didn't want to
3:54go you're forcing Dave to confront his
3:57feelings about Hannah and talk about
4:00things that's the process that needs to
4:04happen um we're going to be talking
4:07about several theorists um you guys know
4:10by now that usually for every one thing
4:12there's several names that go behind it
4:15um so you'll see that we've got five um
4:18four of them are very
4:21similar um you'll kind of as you start
4:24hearing me talk about them think oh my
4:26gosh it's they're saying the exact same
4:28thing only in different words
4:31yes so you will kind of notice that they
4:34do have the same theme they do have the
4:36same order they just kind of tweak it a
4:39little bit so those first four have
4:44three
4:46General um stages that they have
4:49identified that are very predictable for
4:52some groups the first stage is
4:55orientation the group is just starting
4:58out they're looking for some structure
5:01they um want to know what the goals are
5:04they're very dependent on the leader for
5:07everything because they're not sure what
5:09to expect from each other nor from the
5:12leader once that all kind of gets
5:14settled in then we get to the second
5:16stage is
5:17conflict it's conflict between group
5:20members and especially conflict against
5:23the leader so the group is now fighting
5:26the leader for control they want to be
5:29in control they want to dominate they
5:31don't think the leader knows what's
5:33going on you know the group thinks they
5:35know what's best you know right here is
5:38a big critical stage they're either
5:41their group is either going to fall
5:43apart or you're going to be able to help
5:45your group grow from
5:47that and once they can grow past that
5:50that takes them to the third stage which
5:53is where they're able to resolve those
5:55conflicts they've got um they're able to
5:58develop some Harmony between each other
6:00have some intimacy between um the
6:04members of the group and the group has
6:06now got some cohesiveness they're
6:09willing to work together and commit to
6:12completing the goals of the group um
6:15commit to change commit to helping each
6:18other um through everything so those are
6:21the three basic over
6:25General um stages so now we're going to
6:29look through each of our theorists and
6:32see how they break that down just a
6:34little bit
6:35differently um tuckman has four um
6:40stages his is forming storming norming
6:43and then
6:44performing so his Orient forming is the
6:48orientation the um you're testing the
6:51task group um you're trying to see what
6:54everybody can do what they want to do um
6:57they're trying to figure out where do I
6:58fit in in this group and they have a
7:01very um strong dependence on the leader
7:03so they're just forming just starting
7:06out well then we get to this storming
7:08phase so there's all this conflict going
7:11on you know group members are starting
7:12to argue with each other they're
7:15fighting the leader they don't know how
7:17to resolve
7:18anything um so there's that storming
7:21brewing and going on once you can move
7:25past that you get into some
7:27Harmony so that's where we're starting
7:29to normalize okay we're going to bring
7:32everybody back together we're going to
7:34work through these issues we're going to
7:36harmonize
7:38everything once you get there then is
7:42when they're able to perform the task so
7:44they can effectively work through the
7:45conflict and support each other so you
7:48can see how they flow right through the
7:50first one into the second one you'll
7:53also see a lot of these if you don't
7:56push them the group members into the
7:58next level
8:01they can't get any further you know and
8:05you want them to get to the end you know
8:08your goal is for them to get it all the
8:10way up to the mountain you don't want
8:12them to get stuck somewhere so that's
8:14why it's really important that you know
8:17um the strategies or I'm sorry not the
8:20Strat but the stages um that the group
8:22is going to go through that way you can
8:24kind of predict um what's going to
8:26happen next and how you can influence
8:29the outcome of
8:32that um beon took a little different um
8:37take on it he has three levels his is
8:41flight where they're avoiding the
8:43problem they think they don't have a
8:45problem nope I'm just here uh I don't
8:47know why I'm here I'm not going to
8:50interact with anybody that's okay we're
8:52just all going to sit here they're
8:54they're flying away they don't want
8:56anything to do with this group because
8:58they still don't see the the value in it
9:01well then we've got fight you know where
9:03they're they're fighting back no I you
9:05know we're going to fight each other I
9:07don't think the leader knows what
9:08they're talking about I don't agree so
9:11they we've got that fight or in the
9:13other ones that conflict going
9:15on and then he has where they just
9:19transition from that fight into unite
9:22where they all are able to come back
9:24together as a United group um in order
9:27to
9:28function
9:31the third one um is the one that we use
9:34most in class and that I want you to
9:38refer most
9:40to um this is
9:42Schultz has a more interpersonal
9:45Focus um and on the personal needs um
9:50versus the group as a
9:52whole so his is thing it's inclusion
9:56control and affection so inclusion is
10:00that you know think it's being accepted
10:03so think back you know when you're
10:04trying to first start in a group you
10:06don't know where you fit in you just
10:08want to be accepted not only by the
10:10other members but by the leader you
10:13don't know who to
10:15trust um you know who am I able to talk
10:18to who am I not so you're just looking
10:20for that inclusionary piece to it once
10:23you get there then we're battling for
10:25control so this isn't necessarily
10:27control of who's in control
10:30it's a battle for who is going to get
10:33control um the group members are
10:36starting to rebel and challenge the
10:38leader so it's just like you know the
10:40other two were saying this middle
10:42section there's this conflict this fight
10:44going on you know because the members
10:47think oh it's now it's our turn we can
10:49take this over we can lead we don't need
10:53you know that leader anymore we can do
10:55this on our
10:56own so the leader kind of takes on this
11:00advisor director Democratic leader they
11:03kind of have to shift through here so
11:06they can so they can ultimately be in
11:09control because you don't want to allow
11:11your group to Over contr Control you
11:13because it will ultimately fall
11:16apart um so please make sure you're kind
11:19of looking at the table in Cole on
11:2422 it is um page
11:2734 um it gives a really nice chart um of
11:31each of the theorists and kind of how
11:35they say their groups
11:37develop I want you to be able just to
11:39identify okay if I saw inclusion control
11:42and affection I know that's going to be
11:43Schultz if I did forming storming
11:46norming performing that's tuckman that's
11:48kind of how I want you to be able to
11:50know names with the
11:53terms otherwise you're going to know the
11:56general okay how do they usually how
11:58does a group usually start out what
12:00happens after that and how do I get them
12:03out into the best
12:07Stage um Schultz also talks about what
12:11the barriers are to getting our clients
12:14to that affection stage because that
12:16affection stage is ultimately what we
12:18want for our clients um there can be
12:22several causes um for once they've
12:25gotten there to slide backwards or to or
12:29blocking them from ever getting
12:31there it's the arrival of a new member
12:35you know if even if it's just one new
12:37person that new person totally shifts
12:40the dynamic of the group because now the
12:42group doesn't know where that person
12:44fits in that person doesn't know where
12:46they fit in so they're all trying to Fig
12:49back kind of back to square one trying
12:51to figure out okay what's going on can
12:54we trust this person will they do what
12:56they said they're going to
12:58do and the same goes with a new leader
13:01if for some reason a new leader needs to
13:04come in they're not going to know what
13:06to expect you know they don't know what
13:08your what the new leader Ru rules are
13:11going to be what did you know what are
13:12their
13:14expectations so they're like well let's
13:16see what we can do with this leader and
13:18you kind of might see them push buttons
13:20a little more with a new leader because
13:22they want to see what they can get away
13:25with um these two things especially well
13:29even I'll talk about the last one then
13:30we'll I'll do that part um long holidays
13:34as well because think back to you know
13:38last Christmas break you you had the
13:40whole semester with all of us
13:41instructors you got you know to know us
13:44pretty well knew how we
13:45taught what each of us kind of expected
13:48because you guys know we're a little
13:49different well then we had this long
13:51break so you were able to get away from
13:53us well that first week you come back
13:56it's kind of like oh oh I got to get
13:59back in the groove of this oh now I got
14:00to remember how she likes it done how
14:02does she like it done this is how she so
14:04you you had that break so it takes you a
14:08little bit to regroup after a long
14:10holiday so those are three main things
14:13that could um be barriers the nice thing
14:18is we know that those will be barriers
14:21so we can help eliminate how much of a
14:24barrier it will be by giving our clients
14:27some notice so if you know you're going
14:29to have a new member come in you know
14:31give them a little heads up you know
14:33next week Susie is going to be joining
14:35us I just wanted to let you know that
14:37we're going to have a new you know a new
14:39member she'll tell you about herself
14:41next week just so they know it's
14:43coming same with the leadership say you
14:46can't lead group for several weeks and
14:49you're having somebody take over let the
14:51group know you know Jane's going to be
14:54stepping in for me for a few weeks I've
14:56let her know what we're working on she
14:59follows the similar rules that I do so
15:02you need to respect her just as you
15:04would respect me so giving them that you
15:07know chance to have an advanced notice
15:11and not just be shocked that this is
15:14going to happen you know warning them
15:16okay I know we have a really H long
15:18holiday break coming up so this is what
15:20I'd like you to do over the break you
15:22know giving them something to do so they
15:25can keep remembering what um the goals
15:27are for group and what been working
15:31on
15:33um
15:34yolum has um three stages as
15:40well and his is orientation so back to
15:44that we're bringing everybody
15:46together first setting up um you want to
15:51as the leader take advantage of this so
15:54you can set up what the Norms are for
15:56the group you know you don't want the
16:00other group members taking control of
16:02everything and making up their own rules
16:04and their own Norms you want to take
16:06this beginning opportune time to set all
16:10that up for them so they know what to
16:12expect they know what's expected of
16:15them and they can you know get to know
16:18each other and how to begin to flow into
16:21this group well then that automatically
16:24will now lead into that conflict again
16:27it's that dominance for power who who's
16:29going to take over we're going to rebel
16:30against the leader you know we don't
16:32like this dictatorship even though we
16:35know as therapists it's not a
16:38dictatorship they feel it is so they're
16:41going to Rebel um against what's going
16:45on and then that leaves to group
16:50cohesiveness so that's when the group
16:52has successfully been able to resolve
16:55the issues from the past so in that
16:57previous conflict stage they're now able
17:01to work together Express um their needs
17:05and their wants and their feelings with
17:08each other um to try and work past
17:12everything um they'll start to share um
17:16a little more about themselves because
17:18they're feeling
17:20comfortable but ultimately you want them
17:23to get to this maturity level where
17:26members feel free to express anything
17:29positive or negative to anybody in the
17:31group you know there's no real conflict
17:34that goes on everybody kind of gets
17:37along as you can imagine mature a mature
17:41group is very difficult to get to
17:45because things are always going to
17:46happen so this is kind of an always
17:50evolving you know up and down roller
17:53coaster once you hit maturity you might
17:55sit there for a little while and then
17:57something will happen and you'll slide
17:59right back down so it's very difficult
18:03number one to even get groups to
18:05maturity even though that's what you
18:07ultimately
18:08want um but know that they will probably
18:13if something happens something will
18:15slide they'll slide back down and they
18:17might even go all the way back down to
18:19conflict you know or a they might be
18:22mature and one member leaves a new one
18:25comes in and we have to start back all
18:26over from scratch again and work our way
18:28up up even though it was only one member
18:30that
18:31changed because again like I said even
18:34one person totally changes the
18:38dynamic gik was a little different he
18:42had more of a transition model he kind
18:46of said you know that first meeting you
18:48know where the other ones were talking
18:49about the orientation and then they go
18:52to conflict he kind of says we have this
18:54first meeting that
18:55happens and then you head into phase one
19:00where you're starting to get together
19:03you're moving in a positive direction
19:05it's after that initial first meeting so
19:09you're starting to figure out where you
19:14fit and then you hit this midpoint so
19:18there's this midpoint transition that
19:20where things start fighting that
19:22internal that or that external struggle
19:24happens so it's a transition because are
19:27we going to stay in this phase
19:29one where we're just kind of barely
19:31working together or we going to be able
19:33to shift past our conflicts and
19:36transition into phase
19:39two you want to hit that phase two
19:42because once you hit there you take the
19:44momentum of phase two and you can finish
19:46the project so it's this midpoint that
19:50either keeps you at the low end or kind
19:53of pushes you and propels you
19:56forward so but that midpoint is still
20:00that where that conflict happens so we
20:03as therapists need to know when that's
20:07happening because we can have total
20:10influence on which way this goes if we
20:13ignore the conflict or feed into the
20:16conflict we are just going to have let
20:18this group spiral Spiral spiral Spiral
20:20down if we can reenergize them bring
20:24them back together give them strategies
20:27to address the conflict we can help
20:30propel them forward so if you're not
20:33paying attention to what is going on
20:35within the group you're going to miss it
20:38and sometimes it might be too late by
20:40the time you it's really obvious it's
20:43kind of gotten out of control and you're
20:45not able to bring it back down again and
20:49to calm them down and to transition into
20:52that next phase so gik does tweak it
20:56just a little bit um that he has a
20:59couple little extra steps in there but
21:01they do still have that same general
21:06flow and then we're back we're back to
21:09um mosy this is our task oriented groups
21:13so these are talking about the task and
21:16the type of activities that you're doing
21:18within your group so we talked about the
21:22parallel is that task that the say
21:25everybody's doing the exact same thing
21:27but they're working on their own nobody
21:29you know they all have their own
21:30supplies they just happen to be sitting
21:33together you know project they're
21:36working a little bit together maybe
21:37sharing some
21:39supplies um they you might have one or
21:42two people working on maybe one craft
21:45project together that they kind of have
21:47to work together but not a whole lot um
21:52there's some
21:54interaction but like I said it's not
21:56very deep hearted or you know it's just
21:59kind of like hey can we put this here do
22:01you want to make this red or blue you
22:03know it's just very
22:05minimal um kind of a task but sometimes
22:08that's where you need to start just to
22:10get people feeling comfortable talking
22:12to each
22:13other and then that egocentric
22:16Cooperative is when they're okay we can
22:19start talking to each other a little bit
22:20now I can say my opinion you can say
22:24yours we don't know what's going to
22:26happen with it but we're
22:29since we're in a longer term
22:33group you have
22:35more not necessarily freedom but more
22:39ability to kind of you're like okay if
22:40I'm going to be with this group of
22:41people for a while I'm going to kind of
22:43say what I think that tends to be where
22:46your conflicts start to occur because
22:49people are starting to challenge each
22:51other because they're opening up about
22:53their feelings about things and this is
22:56where a shift can come into play so you
23:00want to know okay if my group is getting
23:02close you know we've done these other
23:05projects and but I want them to start
23:07interacting more because I know we've
23:09gotten through that orientation
23:10inclusion phase I need to push them a
23:13little bit we and we've got to go
23:15through that conflict phase before we
23:18can get to the affection stage you just
23:21have to they have to go in order you're
23:23not going to jump from one to the last
23:26one so you can hopefully find some
23:29egocentric Cooperative type tasks for
23:32them to do that's going to encourage
23:34more cooperation with each other more
23:38talking um more things that might
23:41potentially come come up as a conflict
23:43for them so then you can teach them how
23:46to resolve those
23:48conflicts once you've taught them how to
23:51do that then you can get into more
23:53Cooperative tasks this that's where
23:56they're they can work together there
23:58these are the still those long-term
24:01tasks
24:04um they're free everybody feels much
24:08more free to just um to reveal what
24:11they're thinking what they're feeling
24:13because they figured out this you've
24:15taught them the strategies on how to you
24:18know give and receive feedback how to
24:20address conflict so they're a little
24:22more
24:24cooperative and then the mature that
24:27happens when you can start encouraging
24:29people to take on new roles you know
24:32let's try some new things let's push you
24:35a little bit further into being a better
24:37person let's give this a try so since
24:41they're a mature group they'll be
24:43willing to take on that little nudge
24:46from you to try new
24:48things so again make sure you look at
24:52page 337 or 377 in your early um it
24:56gives some descriptions of the skills
25:00for each of these groups as well as um
25:03what the therapist um will be needing to
25:08do how do we help our group get to that
25:12mature stage it's hard but here's some
25:15steps you want to have a clear Focus you
25:18want to know aware of what is the goal
25:21we're working on and keep them heading
25:24towards that goal you don't want to
25:26allow them to get too sidetracked act
25:28into too many different
25:30directions because then you've totally
25:32lost Focus so you always want to make
25:35sure that you're um having the ability
25:37to bring them back to what they're
25:39working on what is the goal that's how
25:42you can redirect people who are kind of
25:44getting off topic you know you can say
25:47you know what Susie I I like that you
25:49you know you feel that you can share
25:50with us but remember to the goal of
25:52today's group is to talk about what so
25:56you bring it back to what's the goal of
25:58this particular group we might be able
26:00to discuss those feelings later but
26:02today this is what we're talking
26:05about but pay attention to those
26:07feelings are there people who are
26:09feeling neglected are there people that
26:11are um too dominating are there people
26:14who are too quiet you know what kind of
26:16feelings might be going on between the
26:19group members it's your job to kind of
26:21figure that out and if you don't know
26:24ask questions to see if you can figure
26:26out what's going on they might just be
26:29quiet because they're having they're not
26:30feeling well that day um but it also
26:33might be maybe they're not feeling well
26:35because they felt attacked by somebody
26:37else's response from earlier in the
26:40group you wouldn't know unless you
26:42started asking
26:45questions be an active participant so
26:49you want to have some level of
26:52disclosure each theorist is kind of a
26:54little different on how much I said you
26:57want to give a little more than your
27:00than your name and where you're from
27:03being the school you want to give a
27:05little more than that but you don't want
27:07to tell them your whole life story you
27:09know you might be able to say you know
27:10what I've lost a loved one as well this
27:12is one of the things I was able to do to
27:15deal with it you know so you at least
27:18revealed a little part of you to show
27:21that you can and do somewhat understand
27:24what they're going through but you
27:27haven't given them so much that you're
27:30now feeling a part of the group that
27:32you're a group member and not the leader
27:34so you still want to maintain that
27:36distance that you're not telling them
27:38too much but you want to tell them
27:42enough that they're able to realize that
27:45you know what you can't empathize with
27:47them you do kind of realize what they're
27:49going
27:50through um giving them feedback you know
27:54you want to be honest but you want to do
27:56it respectfully you know you know that's
27:58why we say going back to the rules you
28:01know Bob we're not following rule number
28:03one you know this is what you need to be
28:05able to do you know I'm telling him he
28:09I'm giving him feedback he's not
28:10following the rules but I'm being very
28:13respectful and that I'm not calling him
28:15a bad person that he's bad that he's in
28:18time out I'm just saying he made a wrong
28:20choice you know that this was a wrong
28:23decision you know we need to make better
28:27choices along with you giving feedback
28:29you need to be open to the feedback do
28:32not become defensive you know if
28:34somebody's trying to give you some
28:37feedback acknowledge that they're giving
28:39you feedback even if you do not
28:42agree even if you know that the reason
28:47you did it some way is the right way to
28:49do it and that there was a good reason
28:52why you did it that way you need to at
28:54least be open to accept that you know
28:56what and say that that might not be a
28:58bad idea for us to think about when we
29:00do this next
29:02time you might not change how you did it
29:05because you knew why you were doing what
29:08you were
29:09doing but they need to know that you are
29:12at least open to hearing things from
29:15them and sometimes they might give you
29:18great feedback and that you know what
29:21this was too easy too childish for we
29:23don't like this well you need to hear
29:27that to know that they're not buying
29:29what you're trying to give to them you
29:31know they want something a little more
29:33challenging or this wasn't to their
29:36level at all you need to be willing to
29:38accept that feedback so you can change
29:41it the next time because if you don't
29:44change it the next time you're going to
29:45lose them they're going to see that you
29:48are not in this for them you are not
29:50willing to help them you don't want to
29:52hear anything that they have to say so
29:54they'll all start shutting down on
29:56you but you also want to take
29:59responsibility for what you've
30:01accomplished you know if you were able
30:03to go from nobody talking to each other
30:06at all the first day and by week three
30:09they're giving each other high fives on
30:11the way in and out the door make sure
30:14that you you know congratulate them for
30:16that and take that as a success success
30:20for you as well because you're the one
30:23that has facilitated that and you've
30:25promoted um that inner interpersonal
30:29communication and comfortability um
30:33between your group members so you need
30:35to be proud of whatever little bit that
30:37you do
30:42accomplish how do you become once you're
30:45once you're aware what do we do how I
30:48mean what is that going to affect well
30:51it helps you choose the activities
30:53appropriately you don't want to end up
30:55choosing an activity and this group is
30:57no nowhere near the level that you need
31:01them to be or vice versa you don't want
31:04to you know do something that's so easy
31:07that they're like okay this I don't see
31:09a point in this so knowing how a group
31:13progresses how they develop What stages
31:16come next will help you pick the right
31:19activity it also helps you to prepare
31:21for what's coming next okay so I already
31:23know we're in this inclusion phase we've
31:25kind of worked through that I know ahead
31:27of time
31:28okay conflict is going to come I'm going
31:30to be ready for
31:32it and then know that your role as a
31:35leader will change throughout each stage
31:38you know so think about you know we said
31:41we're directive during those beginning
31:43stages but by the end we're more of an
31:45advisor so you have to know what stage
31:49they're in so you can tweak your
31:52leadership style to allow the group to
31:56have what they need
32:02every group has its own little culture
32:05no two groups are ever the same like I
32:08said if one person leaves and one person
32:10comes in totally different
32:13group each group will end up deciding on
32:17what their norms and roles are the Norms
32:21are basically the ground rules you know
32:25this is the attitudes and the standards
32:27that are going to be
32:28acceptable Um this can change over time
32:33this can change if a new person comes
32:36in they may be stated specifically or
32:40implied if you this will deter be be
32:44determined it depending on the cognitive
32:48level of your clientele you know if they
32:51need things very specifically drawn out
32:54laid out for them in very simple terms
32:56you're going to need to be very specific
32:58if it's a higher level cognitively
33:00cognitive group you can have some things
33:02that are a little more abstract
33:05implied um in your ground
33:09rules um the Norms may change as the
33:11group develops um you might you know
33:14once you get through the conflict stage
33:17there might be different Norms um that
33:20is now okay I might allow more talking
33:24between each other later in the mature
33:28stage than I might have early on or
33:31things that we were very strict and
33:33rigid about in the
33:35beginning once they're getting a little
33:37more cohesive and working together you
33:39might be a little more LAX about some of
33:41those
33:43rules or it might come down to if a new
33:46member was added you now have to take
33:49into consideration what are they going
33:51to bring to this group so you have to be
33:54able to know what's coming and
33:58anticipate what's going to happen
34:01because of that and be prepared to
34:04respond to what's going to happen it's
34:07all about thinking on your feet you know
34:09not everything can you predict well in
34:12advance um but knowing a lot of this
34:16stuff will help you see some of it
34:19coming so you're not totally
34:22blindsided you also have to really
34:25really strongly know the import
34:27importance of confidentiality in and
34:29outside of the group nothing will kill a
34:32group quicker than if one of the members
34:34hear something they said in the group
34:37outside of the group you know if people
34:39are talking about what they said inside
34:41the group and they weren't in the group
34:43when that person said it they're going
34:45to know somebody
34:47talked it's going to cause huge conflict
34:50distrust because they're going to come
34:52back to you whether it was you or not
34:55they're going to come back to you
34:56because you're the leader you're the
34:57that's supposed to be controlling
34:59everybody so you really need to be
35:03really assertive about the how important
35:06confidentiality is what happens here
35:08what's said here stays right here
35:11amongst this group and that's it nobody
35:14is to say anything about what's going on
35:16in here except to the to the members of
35:19the
35:24group as we're trying to talk through
35:26more of the culture you'll see that the
35:29leader is ultimately responsible for
35:32shaping how we get through um the
35:36culture and how you set it up the reason
35:39this is is a lot of these things that
35:41we're setting up it's how they should be
35:44acting out in society so we're trying to
35:48slowly um train them shape them into
35:51being able to follow the rules and Norms
35:56that happen outside in the general
35:58Society by having them practice with a
36:01little group of people so we need to
36:04help set that up that way they have a
36:07safe place to learn that a safe place to
36:11learn how they follow rules why it's
36:14important so then once they get outside
36:17of group they can take what they learned
36:19outside of
36:22that there's also um these are things
36:27that um you as the
36:29therapist are these are more specific
36:31things that you need to do that will
36:33help shape the way through this have
36:37that very active involvement you're not
36:39just going to sit back and let them all
36:42have at it you need to be an active
36:45participant in what's going on whether
36:48that you know that's answering questions
36:50encouraging that um everybody to talk
36:53you need to be actively
36:56involved the next piece is I think one
37:00of the most difficult pieces it's having
37:03non-judgmental
37:05acceptance it's very difficult to not
37:08put your judgment onto somebody
37:11else it's hard for seasoned therapists
37:15so you can imagine how hard it is for
37:17novice therapists you know just because
37:20you think that's the way it should be
37:22doesn't mean the way they think it
37:24should
37:25be a very basic example example of this
37:28could be your patient might like to walk
37:30around without their shoes on well
37:33you're thinking this floor is gross and
37:35disgusting no they need to put their
37:37shoes on so you tell them no you need to
37:40put your shoes on well why they're
37:43perfectly comfortable without their
37:45shoes they don't mind not having their
37:48shoes on it's just what I would prefer
37:51over what they would
37:53prefer now if they're living in a
37:55facility that the facility requires
37:57wears the shoes now that's different but
38:00what you say is Mr Jones I understand
38:03that you usually like to go barefoot at
38:05home but here in the facility we require
38:09that we wear shoes it's just for your
38:12safety so this way you're not telling
38:14him whether he's right or
38:16wrong because he could perfectly be okay
38:19without shoes he's fine but you're
38:22putting on this is why we have to follow
38:24this particular Rule and like I said
38:27that's an easy one to look at um they
38:29get more difficult once you start
38:31dealing with mental and emotional things
38:34you know just because I feel value in it
38:38does not mean everybody else would so
38:41just because I feel value in showering
38:44every day and being clean doesn't mean
38:48that all my clients find Value in that
38:50right now so I can't put my judgment on
38:53them that they're dirty filthy people
38:56who don't know how to shower and don't
38:57know the importance of showering well
38:59that just might not be important to them
39:02right now so we can't make them feel nor
39:06tell them that you know they're dirty
39:08they're awful people be just because
39:10they're not showering you know there's
39:13other things going on that might be of
39:16more importance to
39:18them so that kind of goes along with um
39:22the desire for self-
39:25understanding so you need to be willing
39:28to have open eyes and an open mind to
39:32what other people think by no means am I
39:36expecting you to believe what everybody
39:38tells you is the truth or that you need
39:41to change how the person you are for
39:44them you just need to accept that
39:47they're different from you it's kind of
39:49that okay we're going to agree to
39:50disagree here you know you might think
39:53one way they think another way but once
39:56you learn from them why they feel that
40:00way it might help you understand better
40:04why you know they're choosing which
40:07they're the option they're choosing when
40:10we go back to the shoes maybe once you
40:12ask Mr Jones why he goes Barefoot he
40:15might tell you he can feel the floor
40:18better in his feet when he's in his bare
40:21feet than if he has shoes and socks on
40:22so he feels safer that way oh well once
40:26he explained it now I understand where
40:28he's coming from that helped me
40:31understand oh he's not just being lazy
40:33not wanting to put his shoes and socks
40:34on you know he figured out that he feels
40:38safer without the on so you just have to
40:41have that open mind to be willing to ask
40:43questions about you know why did they
40:46choose that way why do they feel that
40:49way so you can get in um more
40:52information from them and see about who
40:54they are what are they thinking you know
40:57what information are they drawing from
41:00maybe they think one way because that
41:03was the way their mom and dad Tau them
41:06well you know I'm always supposed to
41:08have my hair up okay Mom and Dad said
41:10I'm not allowed to leave the house
41:11without my hair up well no you can leave
41:14it down nope that's what they taught me
41:16you know so we can't be judgmental and
41:18say oh my gosh she's crazy I don't know
41:20why she won't put her hair
41:21down no you she finds she needs to leave
41:25it up because that was what she was
41:27taught but you just need to find out so
41:30you can understand where they're coming
41:32from and only be willing to change those
41:36Behavior if they are having an extreme
41:38negative effect on somebody like if
41:40they're wanting to walk out in the
41:41middle of traffic okay bad choice uh-uh
41:44that's going to have some major negative
41:46consequences I've got to change your
41:48mind on that
41:49one but if it's just you know whether I
41:53wear rain boots or regular tennis shoes
41:55to go outside if I don't care if I get
41:57wet then it doesn't
41:59matter so it's kind of you know picking
42:02your battles but you want to understand
42:04where they're coming from because maybe
42:07where they're at especially in mental
42:09health those higher level things are not
42:12of importance to them right now you know
42:15they're at a lower
42:17level go back to thinking of maslo than
42:20where you are so what you think is
42:23important is not important to
42:25them you want to present dissatisfaction
42:29with those bad behaviors you want them
42:31to know okay it is not okay to be going
42:34out in the middle of the street when the
42:35traffic's coming you have to and this is
42:37why because you're going to get run over
42:39you know you know it is not appreciated
42:43when you interrupt um someone else while
42:46they're talking and this is why you know
42:49you need to be able to let them know
42:51when you're not happy with their
42:54behavior only then will you be be able
42:57to change it because that's how you're
42:59helping them acknowledge that there's a
43:01problem with the behavior remember we've
43:03talked about
43:05self-awareness they in order for change
43:07they have to be aware of the problem so
43:11you need to make sure they're aware of
43:13what these negative behaviors are you
43:16know you can teach them you know this is
43:19why you should be bathing every day okay
43:23this is why you should this is why it's
43:25socially acceptable then it's still up
43:28to them whether they want to take your
43:30advice or not you know hopefully you've
43:34presented it and well enough for them
43:36that they understand where you're coming
43:38from and kind of want to change their
43:40ways and jump to your
43:42ship but it might not always
43:45happen you know but you have to have
43:48that enthusiasm and that encouragement
43:51that they can feel from you that you are
43:54wanting to help them change you feel
43:56that they can change that they can be a
43:58better person they want to be able to
44:01feel that from you if they can't they're
44:04not going to change
44:10anything sorry
44:14guys so how are we shaping these Norms a
44:18little
44:19more by doing those things on the
44:22previous slide plus we have these
44:24technical things that we've talked about
44:26so far you know knowing um the group
44:29norms and explaining them that's a
44:30technical thing that you need to be able
44:32to
44:33do um making sure each of the members
44:36are talking to each other and not the
44:37leader that's a very technical thing
44:39about group that helps shape what's
44:41going
44:42on you also want to be the role model so
44:47take your experience and knowledge and
44:50role model for them what you want them
44:53to do what are you looking for from them
44:56use the other group members as
45:00reinforcement respond to questions by
45:03asking a
45:05question in return so they're not
45:07depending on you you guys hate it when
45:10we do this but it's also to get you to
45:13think you know we don't want you to
45:15become so dependent on us that you can't
45:19think on your own so yes there are times
45:23that we will just respond directly to
45:25the question and answer it but there's
45:27other times we want you to think about
45:28it well how would you do that Bob you
45:31know or which option do you think would
45:33work better for
45:35you or even trying to ask another member
45:39well Jane what do you think to Bob's
45:41question do you have a better answer for
45:43him you know that way it gets them
45:45talking to each
45:47other and they start relying less and
45:50less on you which is good because that
45:53helps move them through the stages of
45:56development
45:58and again just making sure you're using
46:00um limited self-disclosure you know like
46:03I've said you you need to give them a
46:05little bit but you're not giving them
46:06your whole life story um because you are
46:10there to help them not to help
46:12yourself um so you're just giving them
46:15enough information that they can see
46:18that you might have have some idea of
46:21understanding of what they're going
46:23through um either by a similar situation
46:28or you know a friend who went through a
46:30similar situation and this is how they
46:33responded you know giving them just a
46:35little bit um like I said but not too
46:41much as we go through more um of his
46:44therapeutic Norms make sure that you
46:47have a self-reflection of the group you
46:50know are you able to look back on the
46:52group and see how it's going have you
46:54encouraged self-disclosure you know are
46:57you encouraging them to have that
46:59interaction amongst each other so they
47:02feel safe um to share anything that they
47:06want to about
47:07themselves um you need to make sure
47:10you're reinforcing the importance of the
47:12group so keep coming back to remember
47:14this is our goal this is what I want you
47:16to get out of this group you know I hope
47:19everybody's understanding how important
47:21this
47:23is and you want to encourage them to
47:27change you want to set up the atmosphere
47:31so they feel comfortable with that
47:34change is hard I mean you guys know
47:36yourselves you don't like change very
47:38well so you have to set it up so they
47:41feel safe and supported that when they
47:44do try to make this change if it doesn't
47:47go well they're still feeling safe and
47:50supported or that as they try and do it
47:53they have encouragement to keep trying
47:56to change but if they don't feel safe
47:59and supported they won't even attempt to
48:05change Norms change we kind talk about
48:08as the group develops it's just a matter
48:10of the right timing you know you're
48:13going to have some Norms at the
48:15beginning that don't necessarily relate
48:18once they get towards um the end stages
48:20of
48:21development um if you want them to
48:25progress further you have to challenge
48:27those Norms so they might have developed
48:29the norm that they ask you everything
48:31you know we're going to talk to the
48:32leader we're not going to talk to
48:34everybody else we're going to talk
48:35directly to the leader they establish
48:37that as a norm for them well we're not
48:39going to get anywhere if we don't
48:42challenge that a little bit so you have
48:44to challenge that Norm and put it back
48:46on
48:48them or you know if somebody is being
48:51very
48:52dominating and controlling over what's
48:55going on in the group we're not going to
48:56move forward because there's always
48:57going to be this huge conflict going on
49:00you have to challenge what's going on
49:02and be willing to say okay wait a minute
49:04this is not getting us
49:06anywhere we need to move on so this is
49:09how we're going to do
49:11it it's what happens though when you do
49:15that involves willingness to risk
49:17vulnerability because you may might not
49:20like what you're trying to do just like
49:23you guys don't like it when we turn the
49:25question back on you you don't like like
49:27it you know they're not going to like it
49:29either they want you just to give them
49:31the answer they don't want to talk to
49:33Susie and Bob sitting beside them you
49:35can't make me do
49:37that so it's making you a little
49:39vulnerable because they might start
49:41fighting back with you but you have to
49:44support them and get them to open up
49:47even if it's just a little
49:49bit you know so they're willing to start
49:52interacting with each other or the group
49:55process Will Never Move move forward so
49:58when you quit challenging the group
50:01that's when you're kind of stal me and
50:03they're going to be stuck where they are
50:06once they hit one level you have to be
50:08thinking okay what do I got to do to get
50:10them to the next level what do I got to
50:13do to get him to the next level just
50:15like you would if you're trying to
50:17progress somebody's range of motion okay
50:19I got him to 90 degrees okay well what
50:21do I got to do now to get him to 100°
50:23okay well we're there now how do I get
50:25him to 17 7° you got to you got to
50:29constantly be pushing and challenging or
50:31they're just going to kind of stall out
50:33and just stay where they're at and
50:36you're not going to make any
50:39progress so here's where now we're going
50:41to talk about those specific
50:47roles this is where you divide up kind
50:50of all the tasks everything that needs
50:53to get done within the group there's
50:55three different types there's um task
50:58roles building and maintenance roles and
51:01then individual roles these task roles
51:05help accomplish the task so because of
51:08these roles they make sure the activity
51:11gets
51:12completed building and maintenance roles
51:15help maintain open lines of
51:18communication so you can see these two
51:20things are very positive things you want
51:23as many people taking on tasking um
51:26building maintenance roles as possible
51:28because these are all positive um effect
51:31or effects to the group it's the
51:34individual roles um that we need to
51:37limit they are negative they are going
51:40to interfere with the group
51:43function okay
51:45they're they will stop the group from
51:49progressing
51:50forward now as we talk about some of
51:53them you'll see that some
51:57um especially in the building
51:58maintenance roles you'll see that if
52:01they're taken to the
52:03extreme they could become an individual
52:07role but it's not listed as an
52:10individual role you know some of them
52:12you'll see okay if this person continues
52:14to be like this over and over and over
52:17and over again the group's not going to
52:19function well so then it's an individual
52:22rule but if they're just doing it and
52:24the group is still able to function just
52:27fine then it's okay you don't need to
52:30stop it it's just when those rules are
52:32interfering with the group's ability to
52:34progress or the ability to get a task
52:37done that you need to stop
52:40them they are listed in um they're in
52:44both um coal and early so it's starting
52:46on page 44 in Cole and Pages 371 and 372
52:52in
52:53early um we've got these task roles um
52:57the initiator contributor um they kind
52:59of start things off um and get things
53:02going information Seeker they're always
53:05trying to seek more information they
53:07need to know
53:09more um whereas opinion Seekers they
53:12like to get other people's opinions so
53:15how do you how well how do you think we
53:16should do this do you do you like the
53:18way we did this you know they're they're
53:20wanting other people's
53:21opinions versus the information Giver so
53:26this would be the opposite of the Seeker
53:28The Giver is the one giving all the
53:29facts all of the
53:31information and the opinion Giver is the
53:34one that's constantly giving their
53:35opinions you can see how if somebody was
53:40constantly the opinion Giver it was over
53:42and over and over and over again that
53:45could drive people
53:46crazy and it's affecting the
53:50group you'll see where that comes into
53:53an individual role but if they're
53:55justication Ally offering their op you
53:58still need people to give their opinion
54:00it giving an opinion is not a bad
54:02thing it's when it interferes with
54:05function of the group you know so just
54:09like you know if I don't have full range
54:11Motion in my shoulder well is that okay
54:13I can still do everything okay yeah well
54:15then I don't need to worry about it I'm
54:17still functioning I'm still doing just
54:19fine I don't need to worry about it but
54:22if it's getting in my way of doing what
54:24I need to do then we need to address it
54:27so same thing here you know if it's just
54:29an occasional oh we're still able to
54:31work through it we're okay because we
54:33need these people we need somebody to
54:36ask questions or to be able to answer
54:39those questions and give some
54:40information you know to give and seek
54:43opinions you need that but it's just
54:46when they're taking it to the nth degree
54:49and not benefiting the group that you
54:51need to kind of put a halt to it the
54:54same with the
54:55elaborator this person if they just go
54:58on and on and on and on and on and on
55:00and on they're like oh my gosh how long
55:03are we going to talk about this subject
55:05okay that's not helping the
55:07group but an elaborator really should be
55:10somebody who might re-explain something
55:13or give a more detailed explanation of
55:16something that happened you know if the
55:19directions weren't understood oh well
55:21this is what I thought we were going to
55:22do you know just you know elaborate and
55:25expand upon on what was already
55:28said along with the coordinator you need
55:30somebody to kind of be in charge kind of
55:32coordinate what's going on um supervise
55:35make sure everything is getting done
55:37that needs to get
55:39done um orienter okay make sure are we
55:42bringing everybody back to the table
55:44okay we got side conversations going hey
55:47you guys need to pay attention to what
55:48we're doing over here you know kind of
55:50Orient her right
55:52back um the evaluator critic they kind
55:55of you know at the end kind of look at
55:57everything okay did this go the way
55:59we're evaluating how it went do I have
56:02any NE you know criticisms of how things
56:05went um we need an Energizer you need
56:08somebody that can keep the group going
56:11and keep their energy going keep it
56:14High um your procedural technician is
56:17that rule follower they're very um
56:22tedious with following the rules nope
56:23we're supposed to do it this way this is
56:25what the direction said you know we got
56:27to follow it this way this is how she
56:29said to do it you know they like
56:30everything you know very structure and
56:34then you have that recorder that person
56:36that's you know maybe writing things
56:37down taking
56:39notes um so these help things get done
56:43that's why they're they're task
56:45roles these are also if you think well
56:48there's 12 of them well what if there's
56:50only six people in the group well two
56:54two roles need to be held by by the same
56:56person so you might have to be the
57:00procedural technician and the recorder
57:02you know you keep them on task by
57:04writing everything down so you might you
57:06know one person might have to take on
57:08more than one
57:10role and that's usually how it happens
57:14and then you as the therapist are taking
57:16on all the other roles that your members
57:20haven't taken
57:23on well then we get to the grp group
57:26building and maintenance roles so this
57:28helps you know keep everybody going
57:31keeps the lines of communication
57:37going we got an
57:39encourager so you might think well that
57:41sounds like the Energizer it's kind of
57:43sort of you know we keep everybody
57:45encouraged ready to
57:47go um the same with the harmonizer the
57:51compromiser this is usually the same
57:53person the harmonizer I I want to keep
57:55the peace
57:56you know so you see two F two people
57:58fighting over here you want to try okay
58:00now guys let's not fight because you're
58:03harmonizing so then you probably say
58:05well let's come up with some sort of
58:07compromise you know so usually that
58:09person can be one in the same because
58:11they're very you know they kind of tend
58:12to happen with each
58:14other so the like I said the
58:16compromisers you know finding some kind
58:19of compromise between some conflict
58:20that's going on gatekeeper and expediter
58:24is that person that's like okay wait a
58:25minute we need to talk about that some
58:27other time we need to stay on task we
58:29got to keep going
58:31here um standard Setter is also kind of
58:34that rule follower you know okay we said
58:37we were going to do this this and this
58:38you're not following the rules you know
58:40you got to stay on task
58:43here um the group Observer and
58:46commentator they just kind of sit back
58:49and watch and observe and comment as
58:53things happen it's not always a bad
58:55thing that you know you want somebody
58:57you know I don't know that this looks
58:59right guys I don't know you know they're
59:02kind of from watching what's going
59:04on and then you've got the follower that
59:07person that just follows doesn't argue
59:10they just do whatever they're told to do
59:13now the samees with these as with the
59:14other ones if they become
59:18too over the top you know if um they are
59:23getting in the way of function
59:27you know if that encourager gets too
59:29over the top it could get in the way and
59:32it's going to need to be
59:33stopped but you need all of these things
59:37to happen you need all of these rules in
59:39order for a group to be
59:41successful you just need to keep them
59:44under you know hopefully under
59:46control and that they're not overly you
59:51know you might think we because you guys
59:53said we don't want that cheerleader kind
59:54of person well but you still need an
59:56somebody's got some
59:58energy um but you might need to have
1:00:00them tone it down a little bit okay
1:00:02sounds good but let's tone it down a
1:00:04little bit because they're not really
1:00:06hindering the group process yet but you
1:00:09don't want it to get there because you
1:00:11know if they keep going it's going to
1:00:13get in the way of the group
1:00:17process and then we've got these great
1:00:20old individual roles these are the
1:00:23negative things these are the ones ones
1:00:27that are getting in the way of any of
1:00:31the progress that's going to happen in
1:00:32grou the aggressor is the one that is
1:00:36very aggressive getting mad you know
1:00:39might speak
1:00:41violently um swear throw things they're
1:00:45just very aggressive you know you'll
1:00:47think they have like a chip on their
1:00:48shoulder you know something's going you
1:00:50know they're just very
1:00:52aggressive um the blocker they block any
1:00:55idea you know these people no matter
1:00:57what you say nope that won't work nope
1:00:59nope we're not going to do it that way
1:01:01nope we can't do it that way they're
1:01:02blocking everything that comes their way
1:01:05there's also the opposite of that there
1:01:07where there's this recognition Seeker
1:01:10they're constantly looking for approval
1:01:12well what do you think of this did I do
1:01:14this right you know do you think this is
1:01:16pretty do you think I'm pretty you know
1:01:19they're they're they want some sort of
1:01:21recognition and but they're constant
1:01:24about
1:01:24it there's also the self-c Confessor
1:01:28that's that person that tells you their
1:01:30entire life story and everything that
1:01:35happened and they'll do it all the time
1:01:38you know it's not just when you asked
1:01:40for you know specific details about a
1:01:43story but they just go on and on and on
1:01:45about their entire
1:01:46life okay that is not helping the
1:01:51process the
1:01:53Playboy is all is a Playboy Dominator
1:01:56and that he's kind of think of him as
1:01:58the class clown he's just too cool for
1:02:02this I don't know why I'm in here I
1:02:04don't have a problem you guys all have
1:02:06the problem I'm just too
1:02:08cool I don't need to be in here you know
1:02:12kind of attitude that he's so much
1:02:14better than
1:02:15this so he just has it that's not going
1:02:18to help the group because they're going
1:02:20to want to kick him out you know he is
1:02:22not helping the process at
1:02:24all the help Seeker is kind of like the
1:02:27recognition Seeker it's constant can you
1:02:30help me with this I don't understand
1:02:31this can you help me where does this
1:02:34go you know whereas the information
1:02:36Seeker they might add you know hey I
1:02:38don't remember what she said where this
1:02:40went that would be like an information
1:02:43Seeker that's okay to ask but this help
1:02:46Seeker would do it the whole time what
1:02:48did she say to do can you help me can
1:02:50you help me fold this I'm just not
1:02:53getting it can you do it for me it's
1:02:55constant the whole time it's getting in
1:02:58the
1:02:59way okay and then you've got the special
1:03:02interest pleader where they're trying to
1:03:06stick up for some sort of special entity
1:03:12um whether it be like a certain race
1:03:15religion
1:03:17lifestyle um you know it could be some
1:03:22you know um economic status they're
1:03:24trying to stick up for you know they
1:03:26might be like oh you think all poor
1:03:29people are just trash that's what you
1:03:31think you know they're they're trying to
1:03:32plead that you know this group isn't the
1:03:35way you think they are but they're going
1:03:38on and on and on and on about it well
1:03:41those things are getting in the way and
1:03:43they need to be
1:03:45stopped because that person is not
1:03:48helping your group at
1:03:51all I want you guys to you're going to
1:03:53have to make flashcards cuz you need to
1:03:56know these words you need to be able to
1:03:59match up is it a task role is it an
1:04:02individual a task roll maintenance roles
1:04:05individual
1:04:06roles so if I were you know make a copy
1:04:10of them out of the chapter and make them
1:04:13into
1:04:14flashcards the other way I help you
1:04:17learn them is when you guys present your
1:04:19groups to the class whoever's the group
1:04:22members you will get one of these roles
1:04:26and you will have to in act like one of
1:04:30these people now when you're the leader
1:04:33of the group don't worry I don't hand
1:04:35out like five individual roles so you
1:04:38have you know all of this destruction
1:04:41going on in your group it doesn't happen
1:04:44um it might one maybe two individual
1:04:47roles um so you're not being totally
1:04:50attacked don't worry um but this helps
1:04:54you learn the rules because you have to
1:04:58act it out a little
1:04:59bit plus whoever is sitting outside the
1:05:02group
1:05:04watching um I usually have one to two
1:05:06people guessing what the roles are
1:05:08because it forces them to look at the
1:05:10terms what do they
1:05:11mean what is the behavior going to look
1:05:14like so it gives you a lot of
1:05:17opportunity to look over all of these
1:05:20roles so you know you minus out of
1:05:23yourself from your group you're going to
1:05:25have eight to nine chances to be able to
1:05:28look
1:05:29over all of these roles to help you
1:05:32solidify them a little more in your head
1:05:35it usually never fails somebody will
1:05:38enact one of these so good that when
1:05:40somebody gets into the exam they'll
1:05:42write so and so be you know maybe
1:05:45somebody played the Playboy really good
1:05:48and to be funny they'll write yep that
1:05:49was so and
1:05:51so because that's how they remembered it
1:05:54they remembered that this is how they
1:05:55and then that was a perfect portrayal of
1:05:57it and that's how they remembered what
1:06:00the Playboy
1:06:01meant um so you will draw out um what
1:06:06role you will need to do for each
1:06:07different
1:06:10group now we're going to start talking
1:06:13about how do we handle any of those
1:06:15extreme individual
1:06:22participants you need to make sure that
1:06:25you're not allowing for any dominance
1:06:29and you know not any one person is
1:06:31totally taking over versus not any one
1:06:34person being totally quiet and not doing
1:06:38anything um know that cultural
1:06:41influences will influence their behavior
1:06:44so be aware of what outside cultures are
1:06:48going on and how those would be
1:06:51affecting anything within the group you
1:06:54know even if it's down you maybe
1:06:56somebody doesn't know how to read and
1:06:58they don't want everybody to know that
1:07:01so you're wondering why they're not
1:07:02participating in the group and you're
1:07:05wanting them to read something so
1:07:08they're starting to act out well that
1:07:11might be why it's not because they're
1:07:13you know normally a negative person but
1:07:16they don't want people to know that they
1:07:17can't read so you want to kind of be
1:07:20aware of those things that might um
1:07:23become an
1:07:24issue
1:07:26don't
1:07:28acknowledge power
1:07:30struggles if you you know are fighting
1:07:34with you know the members for power and
1:07:37it becomes into this big it just creates
1:07:39frustration and resentment you kind of
1:07:41need to back off kind of think okay
1:07:43we're going to back off here I know
1:07:45we're in a conflict phase this is how I
1:07:48can help resolve the
1:07:50conflict and then move
1:07:53forward but if you try to you keep
1:07:55trying to put your foot down and demand
1:07:58that you're
1:07:59right you're only trying to control
1:08:02everything that's going on and
1:08:03everybody's going to get more frustrated
1:08:05because then the group members are going
1:08:07to resent you more and they're going to
1:08:09fight back and then you're not getting
1:08:11anywhere so by you stomping around you
1:08:15know figuratively stomping around being
1:08:18nope we're going to do it my way no
1:08:20you're going to listen to me this is how
1:08:22we're going to do it you're not giving
1:08:25them any control
1:08:27whatsoever and they're not going to
1:08:29appreciate that at all and then you're
1:08:31not helping them move forward in the
1:08:33process because then they become
1:08:35dependent on you and that's not what the
1:08:37goal is you want them to eventually be
1:08:40able to do some things on their own so
1:08:42you might have to work and do some
1:08:44compromise okay guys how about you come
1:08:47up with the activity that you want to do
1:08:49but I'll bring everything in so then
1:08:51they still feel like they have some
1:08:53control over what's going on on but you
1:08:56still have the underlying power in
1:08:59what's going on they just don't realize
1:09:02it so you have to facilitate that and
1:09:06make sure that you are constantly
1:09:08thinking what's the best for the group
1:09:10how can I do this to help them move
1:09:13forward I can't keep them stagnant in
1:09:15this spot what can I do what can I
1:09:18say what's going to happen next and how
1:09:21can I get them
1:09:24there
1:09:26some of these
1:09:27extreme you know participant or the is
1:09:30the monopolist you know you'll hear them
1:09:34they're constantly monopolizing the
1:09:37situation you
1:09:39know when you
1:09:42and they just want to take control over
1:09:46everything but you want that monopolist
1:09:50to hear how they are affecting everybody
1:09:53else so you need to get the members
1:09:57willing and comfortable to say when you
1:09:59speak like that to me I
1:10:03feel you know or you know what I'm
1:10:05feeling attacked when you speak to me
1:10:08like that you know I'm feeling
1:10:10disrespected or I feel like my opinion
1:10:13doesn't matter when you speak to me like
1:10:15that that way the monopolist can hear
1:10:20and see the effects of what he or she is
1:10:23doing is it going to work right away no
1:10:28because they' probably kind of probably
1:10:29heard it from other
1:10:31people but the more they can hear and
1:10:34more they can see that it's going on you
1:10:36can slowly get them to real okay I
1:10:39really am hurting people here I do need
1:10:43to kind of back off a little bit not
1:10:46only are you helping the monopolist but
1:10:48you are helping the person being
1:10:51monopolized because they at least are
1:10:53starting to feel some control control
1:10:55that they can speak up even if they're
1:10:58not heard by the other person they at
1:10:59least feel like they have a voice in
1:11:02what's going on and can start speaking
1:11:04their
1:11:06mind and we got yep that silent member
1:11:09you know they're just going to sit back
1:11:11and not say a thing well they're not
1:11:14helping
1:11:15anything because what happens you always
1:11:18wonder okay what is she thinking over
1:11:20there she hasn't said anything for like
1:11:22three weeks in group how do you think
1:11:25she likes us what is she thinking is
1:11:26going on you know so everybody kind of
1:11:28Wonders about this silent
1:11:30person so it's your job to try and get
1:11:34that silent person to talk even just a
1:11:36little bit to help them find some common
1:11:41things um with their group members um
1:11:44there was an example in the book um that
1:11:47this one lady you know they were
1:11:49participating in a college group I think
1:11:52and everybody kept complaining about the
1:11:54dorms and the food and all this stuff
1:11:56and she just sat back was really quiet
1:11:59didn't really say anything for several
1:12:01weeks until somebody finally at you know
1:12:04well why aren't you saying
1:12:06anything well here it was because she
1:12:08didn't live in the door she lived off
1:12:10campus had a full-time job with her um
1:12:13School load and what the other group
1:12:16members concerns were weren't anything
1:12:18that she had concerns with so she felt
1:12:20really out of
1:12:22place so the group leader helped
1:12:25the other group members and her find
1:12:27some common ground so they could talk
1:12:30about some things but just because
1:12:32somebody silent doesn't mean they don't
1:12:35want to be there or that they don't have
1:12:37anything important to say they just
1:12:39might not feel comfortable enough saying
1:12:42anything so they need to feel
1:12:46comfortable and sometimes proded or
1:12:48proded a little bit to say
1:12:53something here's the those attention
1:12:56getting behaviors I just like all of the
1:12:58attention so I'm going to do whatever I
1:13:01can that self-deprecatory I kind of
1:13:04talked about the other day they have you
1:13:06give them feedback on how they're it
1:13:09makes them feel but they reject it they
1:13:14okay tell me what you know tell me all
1:13:16about me to you
1:13:17know
1:13:20um they you know they want your help
1:13:22they seek your help but they don't want
1:13:24to find follow it so what you need to do
1:13:28is have the group tell this self
1:13:34deprecates me
1:13:36feel you know it's always hard to get
1:13:38people to talk about their
1:13:41feelings but when you do it in this way
1:13:43where it's very specific so if that
1:13:45self-deprecatory is like nope that's not
1:13:47going to work nope that's not going to
1:13:48work and the rest of the group is like
1:13:50oh my gosh we're going through this
1:13:52again you know the group needs to say to
1:13:55that person you know we don't quite
1:13:57understand why you keep asking for our
1:13:59help if you don't want our help you know
1:14:03or it it makes us feel like I don't know
1:14:07what the word would be um when you don't
1:14:09want to listen to us you know you need
1:14:12to get the rest of the group feeling
1:14:14comfortable that they can confront this
1:14:16person on their
1:14:19behavior the help rejecting complainers
1:14:22kind of along the line of the
1:14:24self-deprecatory
1:14:25um but they just con they're just
1:14:27constantly complaining oh my gosh this
1:14:29didn't go right this didn't go right
1:14:31this didn't nothing ever goes right for
1:14:33them and they reject all the help that
1:14:37you can give them but they constantly
1:14:40complain about all these things going
1:14:42wrong and they blame other
1:14:45people you know so the therapist needs
1:14:48to help um the group members empathize
1:14:51and understand their feelings and not to
1:14:54feed into to you know cuz this is
1:14:57attention seeking Behavior they're just
1:14:58trying to get attention they're just
1:15:00doing it in a negative
1:15:02way which goes right along with this um
1:15:06narcissistic um
1:15:08person they just feel entitled to
1:15:11everything you know they want all of the
1:15:14attention you should be paying attention
1:15:15to me because I'm the most important
1:15:17person in this room nobody else in this
1:15:19room
1:15:20matters this is kind of like with that
1:15:23the individual roles that would be the
1:15:24Playbook way you know nope I'm here I
1:15:27don't have a problem at all I don't know
1:15:29why I'm here I'm perfect you
1:15:32know you just need to get the rest of
1:15:34the group members to be just gentle
1:15:37avoid setting off this person getting
1:15:39defensive okay all right you kind of not
1:15:44ruffle any
1:15:45feathers because at that point it's not
1:15:48it's not worth your argument um but you
1:15:51want the rest of the group to feel like
1:15:54they can still men
1:15:59you and then if there's any psychotic
1:16:03behavior going on whoops
1:16:06sorry um you want to try and stay
1:16:08focused on the activity that's going on
1:16:11you know doing that redirection you
1:16:13don't want to allow them to necessarily
1:16:16elaborate on what's going on you know if
1:16:18they're having like a delusion or a
1:16:21hallucination you want to redirect them
1:16:24back to what's going on to the activity
1:16:27and what's going on in Group you don't
1:16:30want to allow them to keep talking about
1:16:33it because then that
1:16:34changes um not only their focus and
1:16:37keeps their focus on that delusion and
1:16:39hallucination but it also then affects
1:16:41the rest of the group by changing the
1:16:43focus from the whole group to just um
1:16:47what this one client is doing and that's
1:16:50not for the betterment of the
1:16:52group you always have to think
1:16:55what is best for the group as a
1:17:00whole so how do we get to the
1:17:02termination of a group what is that
1:17:04that's the end you know the group's
1:17:07going to end you know you guys guess
1:17:10what the end of the semester we kind of
1:17:12have to terminate how this group
1:17:17is how your group is as a class you're
1:17:20not going to be seeing each other all
1:17:21the time
1:17:22anymore you know you're still kind of
1:17:24there each other but it's a little more
1:17:26distant because you're going to be on
1:17:27level
1:17:28twos so members are going to start
1:17:32acting up because they don't want this
1:17:35group to end they might start
1:17:37withdrawing we're not going to
1:17:39participate as well because maybe then
1:17:41we won't have to disband because they'll
1:17:44think that's we're we're not better yet
1:17:46so we're going to start withdrawing and
1:17:47then they'll keep us
1:17:49together they'll start devaluing the
1:17:52importance of a group oh this isn't
1:17:54important anyway way I didn't really
1:17:56want to be here anyway so it's okay if
1:17:57the group is done but you know better
1:18:00than that you know they they're just
1:18:02trying to make themselves feel better
1:18:04about
1:18:05it they're having anger towards the
1:18:08leader and other members they're mad
1:18:11they don't want this to end and they
1:18:13don't realize that that's what it is so
1:18:15they're going to start acting out
1:18:17they're just
1:18:19mad and then there's the silent they're
1:18:22silent they're inactive so they went
1:18:25from just playing withdrawing to now
1:18:26they're not doing
1:18:28anything and then they end up leaving
1:18:30the group prematurely because they're
1:18:33done with it they want to it's kind of
1:18:35like they want to leave on their own
1:18:37terms not when you said the group is
1:18:40final and
1:18:45done so that's where you will see It'll
1:18:48tend to look like okay we've made this
1:18:51you know we've made it to the top peak
1:18:54of our group so you know you're getting
1:18:56ready to disband the group because we've
1:18:58met our goals we've reached the top but
1:19:00then they're going to be those
1:19:02regressions
1:19:04back well how do we help them because we
1:19:07can't keep going with the group forever
1:19:09you know no groups are
1:19:11indefinite well we've got to review
1:19:14what's happened over this whole time
1:19:16talk about all the positives and
1:19:19negatives that happen during the group
1:19:22prepare them for you know feeling a
1:19:25little separation and loss from
1:19:27everybody because they've gotten to know
1:19:29everybody you know and they feel
1:19:31comfortable you know well what do we do
1:19:33now when we're not going to see these
1:19:35people anymore you know you want them to
1:19:37talk about those
1:19:40concerns you know use some counseling
1:19:42skills as far as you know helping them
1:19:47talk and work through um the separation
1:19:51and loss especially I think if you've
1:19:53got several people in your grp group who
1:19:55have who grew up having a lot of loss in
1:19:58their lives or
1:20:00abandonment okay they've develop trust
1:20:03with this group and all of a sudden now
1:20:04you're going to tell them it's gone now
1:20:07they're going to you're going to see
1:20:08them slide backwards a little bit so you
1:20:11need to help you know review and
1:20:14encourage to um your clients to use
1:20:17those things you've talked about in
1:20:19group to help keep the
1:20:22anxiety um from coming back and not feel
1:20:25like they're this horrible person
1:20:27because the group is breaking up you
1:20:29know because that's the biggest part you
1:20:31know people will miss that
1:20:34interaction you know you guys will miss
1:20:36the interaction of seeing each other all
1:20:38the time you'll you'll feel this
1:20:40separate you know the separation this
1:20:43loss now you're you know we're healthy
1:20:46enough to know okay well you're like
1:20:47well I'll just pick up the phone and and
1:20:49call them or I'll send them a text
1:20:51they're you know not totally
1:20:53away but that's because we have healthy
1:20:58coping strategies you know our clients
1:21:01might need us to remind that okay
1:21:04remember we talked about that you know
1:21:07you can call so and so when you're
1:21:09feeling frustrated or you know you we
1:21:13decided that you could go you know take
1:21:15a walk you know when you know remind
1:21:19them and review those things um that
1:21:21you've talked about
1:21:23before um finish any unfinished business
1:21:27so if there was you know an incident
1:21:31that didn't get fully resolved make sure
1:21:35that everybody's feeling okay about what
1:21:38happened before the group ends cuz
1:21:42that's a horrible feeling too you walk
1:21:44away feeling like okay I I'm still kind
1:21:47of mad at that person we never kind of
1:21:50resolved what was happening so you just
1:21:52still kind of fester that anger
1:21:55because it was never fully
1:21:57resolved and then that just kind of eats
1:21:59away at you over time and it just builds
1:22:01and builds and
1:22:02builds so you want to make sure that um
1:22:07you've you know resolved everything that
1:22:09everybody's feeling good about
1:22:11everything um you give them um positive
1:22:14feedback on the skills that they learned
1:22:16you know like I said reminding them
1:22:18about all the positive things they've
1:22:20done reminding them of all the
1:22:22strategies that you've given them
1:22:25um generalize the learning that they've
1:22:27done so they can feel like okay I get I
1:22:30can move on from this group now it is
1:22:33okay that we break away and that I can
1:22:36move
1:22:40on how do you know if a group was
1:22:45effective or not
1:22:49effective you want your groups to have
1:22:51all of
1:22:53these things occur high levels of
1:22:56trust all individual and cultural
1:22:59differences are
1:23:00respected clear boundaries and rules of
1:23:03conduct are in place conflict is
1:23:06acknowledged and worked through that's
1:23:09usually a big one that people Miss we
1:23:11kind of all like to avoid conflict but
1:23:13you have to acknowledge it and work
1:23:15through it then and
1:23:18there okay otherwise don't sweeping it
1:23:20under the rug or saying we'll address it
1:23:22some other time does not help
1:23:25information and resources are openly
1:23:27shared so everybody's free to O you know
1:23:29share whatever they have every member
1:23:35participates unproduced that should be
1:23:38behaviors behavior um unproductive
1:23:41behaviors is managed so if it's not
1:23:43productive you take care of it remember
1:23:45we have to look out for the betterment
1:23:47of the of the
1:23:48group um the group has accomplished
1:23:50their goals nonverbals are acknowledged
1:23:53and commun
1:23:54communicated sometimes you have to point
1:23:57them out okay this is what your
1:23:59nonverbals are telling me is that
1:24:01correct um not everybody realizes what
1:24:04their nonverbals are saying or they are
1:24:09not feeling that way at all and it's the
1:24:11way you're interpreting those nonverbals
1:24:14so making sure that you know you've made
1:24:17people
1:24:18accountable um for those nonverbals so
1:24:21they're aware that okay when I do this
1:24:24some people might think I'm saying or
1:24:26doing
1:24:28this uh continuity between the sessions
1:24:31are you following through and being
1:24:33consistent um showing caring and respect
1:24:37and then you've got results in um what
1:24:40you saw which is basically you were able
1:24:43to meet your
1:24:45goals so that is this big huge
1:24:49section um so again please make sure
1:24:52you're reading um chapter 2 in Co
1:24:55and chapter 12 out of
1:24:58early

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