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Grant Amato | Was this Parricide Motivated by Sex Addiction? — Transcript

by Dr. Todd Grande · 2,059 words · 378 segments · language en · Watch on YouTube

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0:00hello this is dr grande today's question
0:02is
0:03can i analyze the grant a motto case
0:06just a reminder i'm not diagnosing
0:07anybody in this video only speculating
0:10about could be happening a situation
0:11like this
0:12if you enjoy this video please like it
0:14subscribe to my channel
0:15and consider supporting me on patreon
0:17i'll put the link to patreon in the
0:18description
0:19for this video first i'll go through the
0:21background of the case i'll move to the
0:23timeline of the crime
0:24then i'll offer my analysis grant amato
0:27was born
0:28on may 20 1989 in florida
0:31his parents were named chad and margaret
0:34amato was the youngest of three
0:36his brothers were cody and jason amato
0:39graduated from high school in 2007
0:42and earned a nursing degree in 2011
0:45he was particularly close to his brother
0:47cody who was a nurse
0:48anesthetist amato had hopes of doing
0:51that same job
0:52in june of 2018 amado was working at a
0:55hospital
0:56the staff called the police saying that
0:58a motto was suicidal
0:59and had stolen a medication named
1:02propofol
1:03he was arrested for grand theft while
1:06out on bail
1:07he spent a lot of time on his computer
1:09eventually becoming interested
1:11in a bulgarian model named sylvia
1:14who he had contact with via webcam amato
1:17wrote her name
1:18as sylvie s-y-l-v-i-e
1:22but her name is actually sylvia
1:24s-y-l-v-i-y-s
1:26so i will call her sylvia amato stole
1:29200 000
1:30from his parents and his brother and he
1:32spent it on sylvia
1:33who he considered to be his girlfriend
1:36the family did not press charges
1:38they wanted to get a motto help in
1:40december of 2018
1:41amato traveled to japan with his brother
1:44cody
1:44they were both interested in anime which
1:47seemed to be a motivator for this trip
1:50when he returned to united states his
1:52family realized he was still obsessed
1:54with sylvia at their urging he agreed to
1:56go into a rehabilitation facility
1:59located in fort lauderdale florida
2:01amato's parents and brother
2:03had paid thousands of dollars to pay off
2:05amato's debts
2:07for his attorney for the trip to japan
2:09and now they're going to pay for the
2:12rehabilitation they were doing
2:14everything they could
2:15to keep him out of prison they told him
2:17that if he contacted sylvia again
2:19he was going to be kicked out of the
2:20house the two-month program he entered
2:23was for internet
2:24and sex addiction but he left after two
2:26weeks
2:27he wrote a letter on january 22 to a
2:30number of friends he met online
2:32in which he proclaimed his love for
2:35sylvia
2:36i'll talk more about that later in my
2:37analysis this brings us to january 24
2:412019. according to the prosecution this
2:44is what happened
2:45on that day amado was home alone with
2:48his mother
2:49at about 4 30 pm the house was located
2:51in seminole county
2:53he shot her from behind while she was
2:55sitting at a computer desk
2:57at 4 45 pm at 5 30 pm
3:00when his father chad arrived home amado
3:03shot him twice in the head
3:05amato positioned chad's firearm in a
3:08holster
3:09backwards on chad's right hip
3:12sometimes people do position a gun in
3:14this way this is called a cross draw
3:16they have to reach across their body and
3:18pull the gun from the opposite hip
3:21it's sometimes used if somebody believes
3:22they'll have to draw a weapon
3:24when they're sitting down like if
3:25they're in an automobile
3:27so if somebody were left-handed they
3:29would put the gun on their right hip
3:30with the grip facing forward
3:32the problem here is that chad was right
3:34handed
3:35sometime between 9 30 and 10 pm cody
3:38came home from work
3:40amato shot him as he entered the house
3:42at some point
3:43amato took cody's gun and placed it near
3:47cody's body but it was not the murder
3:49weapon amato did a poor job
3:51of trying to frame his brother at 12 21
3:54am
3:55amado made his way to a publix
3:57supermarket he logged on to the wi-fi
4:00he accessed cody's bank account at 208
4:02am
4:03to buy more tokens for sylvia's website
4:07when cody didn't report for work one of
4:09his co-workers called the police
4:10who conducted a wellness check at 9 17
4:14am they discovered the bodies amado was
4:17arrested in a hotel
4:18on january 26 and questioned and three
4:21hours of questioning
4:22he never asked what happened to his
4:24family he was released
4:26then arrested again on january 28th
4:29amado was convicted on july 31
4:312019 in august he was sentenced to life
4:34in prison
4:35now moving to my analysis i'm not aware
4:38of any diagnosis
4:39being given to a motto there's not a lot
4:41of information about his personality
4:42either
4:43from looking at the hours of police
4:45interviews a motto appears to be
4:47high in openness to experience he was
4:50creative and
4:50invested in fantasy and we see he seems
4:53to be mid-range
4:54in conscientiousness extroversion and
4:56agreeableness
4:58and perhaps above average in neuroticism
5:01one area that was focused on during the
5:03trial was this eight page letter that he
5:05wrote
5:05on january 22 to his online friends
5:09about sylvia here are a few key items
5:11from that letter
5:13the overall purpose of the letter was an
5:14apology to these different men
5:17amato considered them to be at least
5:19good acquaintances
5:20he wrote that he made a mistake with
5:22sylvia upsetting her
5:24he lied about being a gamer driving a
5:27bmw
5:28and owning his own house he claimed to
5:31be something that he wasn't because he
5:33was intimidated
5:34amato wrote that his father and brother
5:36were controlling and
5:37forced him into that clinic in fort
5:40lauderdale
5:40when he was in the clinic his family
5:42accessed his computer
5:44and lied to sylvia about him amato then
5:47individually addresses the people in
5:49this online group
5:50saying how he was sorry and really
5:52appreciated them
5:54he went on to write that he wanted a
5:55second chance with sylvia
5:57and he deeply cared for her he believed
6:00that his relationship with sylvia grew
6:02quickly
6:02and they became close this trapped him
6:06in his lies he wanted to be a shoulder
6:08that she could cry on
6:10and a person to whom she could express
6:12her emotions
6:13freely he was unable to function without
6:15her
6:16not communicating with her was the most
6:18painful experience he had ever been
6:20through
6:21this specific line appears to connect
6:23with the concept of addiction
6:26amato wrote that he truly loves sylvia
6:28even though
6:29she didn't believe someone could love
6:30someone so quickly
6:32when an online model thinks the
6:34relationship is growing too quickly
6:36that's a pretty bad sign i wouldn't
6:38imagine these models typically want to
6:40slow things down
6:41this would be like a video poker machine
6:43telling somebody to stop betting
6:45a motto urged the members of the group
6:47never to lie to sylvia
6:49and if they had lied to her they needed
6:51to come clean
6:53now here it would seem that amado
6:55believed the people in the group
6:57were running under the same fantasy that
6:59he was
7:00like he had company and maybe he did
7:03maybe they felt the same way
7:04about sylvia i guess this speaks well to
7:07sylvia's future earning potential
7:09there are plenty of customers out there
7:11amato wrote that he wanted to make
7:12sylvia's dreams come true i suppose
7:16to be fair i think he was making her
7:18dreams of getting rich come true
7:20he should have specified the dreams to
7:22which he was referring
7:24from this letter we see someone who
7:26appears to have a poor understanding
7:28of relationships many of the things he
7:30was saying are red flags
7:32but it doesn't seem to have any insight
7:34as i understand it
7:35it cost a motto around ten dollars a
7:37minute to communicate with sylvia
7:40he was spending about four hours a night
7:42on the webcam with her
7:44so this comes to about twenty four
7:46hundred dollars
7:47per session when he no longer had
7:49computer access
7:51and or could not afford to pay he tried
7:53to reach sylvia on her twitter account
7:56but she rarely responded she only
7:58responded
7:59when he was paying her somehow amado
8:01thought that that was consistent
8:03with a true romantic relationship so
8:06what could be happening in a case like
8:08this
8:09one-sided relationships can occur at a
8:11distance like online
8:13just like they can occur in person a man
8:16compensating a woman
8:17for various levels of affection is not
8:19unheard of
8:20what's really unusual is when the man
8:22believes there's some type of romantic
8:24commitment involved
8:25the man believes he's in love but the
8:26woman is simply operating a business
8:29she is playing a part and perhaps being
8:31manipulative
8:32but in a way that's what the man is
8:34asking for
8:35he is paying to feel some type of
8:38romantic connection to feel
8:40wanted and necessary it really comes
8:43down to a lack of empathy
8:45and a lack of insight on the part of the
8:47man he is unable to understand
8:49that the woman is not really
8:50reciprocating he might as well be in
8:53love with a vending machine
8:54the man is addicted to the feeling of
8:56being in love
8:57even though no love is actually there
9:00it's an over-investment
9:01in fantasy now specifically in this case
9:05amato took this type of one-sided
9:07relationship much further
9:09than most people would one could argue
9:11his behavior was consistent
9:13with addiction for example after the
9:15murders
9:16pictures of several credit cards were
9:18found on a motto's computer
9:20including those that belong to his
9:22grandmother uncle
9:23aunt and one of his cousins a motto was
9:26willing to steal from anyone
9:28to stay in contact with sylvia what
9:30really stood out in this case was the
9:32parasite
9:33if there was an addiction that again is
9:35not unusual
9:36that affects many people but for someone
9:38to go
9:39this far to communicate with a webcam
9:41model it really doesn't make any sense
9:44we know from the research literature
9:45that parasite is rare
9:47adult parasite offenders are often
9:50psychotic
9:51so they'd have something like
9:52schizophrenia i've seen no evidence of
9:54that
9:55in this case many have anti-social
9:57personality disorder
9:59again we don't see any discussion of
10:00that in this case
10:02adult parasite offenders are almost
10:04always violent during several incidents
10:06before
10:07the homicides which doesn't seem to be
10:10what happened
10:10here 62 percent of these offenders were
10:13under mental health care
10:14before the offense a motto had been to
10:17that clinic
10:18so there is a connection to that element
10:21one theory about what could have
10:22happened in this case
10:23is that a motto had this obsession with
10:26the model
10:26that became almost delusional he lost
10:29track of reality
10:31he had it in his mind that he really
10:33couldn't live
10:34without her almost like an extreme fear
10:37of abandonment
10:38like his very existence was threatened
10:41without her he would be nothing to
10:44preserve his own existence
10:45he was willing to do anything all people
10:48entered into two categories from his
10:50perspective
10:51obstacles and sylvia so here we see what
10:54could be considered narcissism
10:56he only had sight of his own pain no one
10:59else's lives
11:00mattered the last part i want to cover
11:02here
11:03is the reaction that the family had
11:06to amato's behavior i have seen so many
11:09instances over the years
11:11where families continually try to keep
11:13offenders
11:14out of trouble they don't want the
11:16police involved they don't want the
11:17offender to experience
11:19consequences i understand this position
11:22the law does a great job of punishing
11:24and a poor job of rehabilitating people
11:27are just
11:28repeatedly disappointed in what the
11:31justice system
11:32has to offer they don't view it as
11:34really helpful
11:35in the end but at some point it's really
11:37about
11:38boundaries when somebody becomes
11:40addicted the most vulnerable people
11:42are the ones close to them it's a
11:45condition that bypasses traditional
11:47safety methods like locking doors and
11:49alarm systems
11:51it takes over a victim and turns them
11:53into an intruder
11:54who victimizes unsuspecting and
11:57overwhelmed
11:58family members boundaries may not have
12:01saved
12:01grant a motto but they may have saved
12:04his family
12:05those are my thoughts on the grant amato
12:07case please put any opinions and
12:09thoughts in the comment section
12:11they always generate an interesting
12:13dialogue as always i hope you found my
12:14analysis on this topic to be interesting
12:17thanks for watching

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