Foster parents, what's the smallest thing your kid did that broke your heart? #storytime #shorts — Transcript

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1. 0:00Foster parents, what's the smallest
2. 0:01thing your kid did that broke your
3. 0:02heart? When Eli came to live with me at
4. 0:03seven, every guide I read warned me he
5. 0:05might scream, break things, test me for
6. 0:07months. Nobody warned me about the
7. 0:09opposite, that he'd spend every day
8. 0:10trying to take up as little space as
9. 0:11possible. He showed up in a pair of
10. 0:13scuffed sneakers two sizes too big,
11. 0:15laced so tight the knots had gone hard.
12. 0:16The case worker handed me a folder,
13. 0:18ruffled his hair, and drove off. Eli
14. 0:19stepped inside, looked at the couch, the
15. 0:21kitchen, the hallway, and asked me one
16. 0:22quiet question, "Where do I sit so I'm
17. 0:24not in the way?" I told him he could sit
18. 0:25anywhere he liked. He chose the chair
19. 0:27closest to the front door. That first
20. 0:28night I tucked him in and noticed he
21. 0:30still had his shoes on. I told him he
22. 0:31could take them off to sleep. He nodded,
23. 0:33waited until I left, and kept them on
24. 0:34anyway. Every morning after that, same
25. 0:36shoes, still laced. He never kicked them
26. 0:38off at the door like other kids. He wore
27. 0:39them in the house, in the yard, right up
28. 0:41until the lights went out, and I was
29. 0:42fairly sure after them, too. When I
30. 0:43offered to buy him a pair that actually
31. 0:45fit, he shook his head fast, "These are
32. 0:46fine. I can run in these." I didn't
33. 0:48understand what he meant, not yet. He
34. 0:49was careful in a way no seven-year-old
35. 0:51should be. He never asked for seconds.
36. 0:52He ate fast, like the plate might
37. 0:54disappear. He said sorry for things that
38. 0:55weren't his fault, a dropped fork, a
39. 0:57creaky stair, a question. If I raised my
40. 0:59voice even to call him for dinner, his
41. 1:01climbed to his ears. He slept on top of
42. 1:03the blankets, never under them, like a
43. 1:04guest who might be asked to give the
44. 1:05couch back. And every single morning his
45. 1:07little backpack was packed by the bed,
46. 1:08the same three things zipped inside,
47. 1:10ready to grab. He always kept his coat
48. 1:11in his lap instead of hanging it up.
49. 1:13When I pointed at the empty hooks by the
50. 1:14door, he said, "I'd rather hold it. That
51. 1:16way it's ready." That word again, ready.
52. 1:18About three weeks in, I came home early
53. 1:20and found him standing in the hallway
54. 1:21with his little backpack already on both
55. 1:23shoulders, just standing there, waiting.
56. 1:24My chest went tight. "Going somewhere,
57. 1:26buddy?" He looked at the floor. "I heard
58. 1:27a car in the driveway. I thought maybe
59. 1:29it was time to go." I asked him what he
60. 1:30meant. "Go where?" He shrugged like it
61. 1:32was obvious, "To the next place. Last
62. 1:33time they came at night, I didn't get my
63. 1:35stuff. So now I stay ready." I had to
64. 1:37sit down on the stairs. I couldn't make
65. 1:38my voice work. I finally managed to tell
66. 1:40him nobody was coming to take him
67. 1:41anywhere. He gave me a small, tired
68. 1:43smile I'll never forget. "That's what
69. 1:44the last one said, too." That night I
70. 1:46didn't sleep. I kept doing the math on
71. 1:47how many times a kid gets promised
72. 1:49forever before he stops taking his shoes
73. 1:51off. So I stopped promising. I decided
74. 1:52to show him instead. That weekend I
75. 1:54didn't take him for toys or clothes. I
76. 1:55took him to the hardware store and
77. 1:56bought a pencil and a level. When we got
78. 1:58home, I stood him against the doorframe
79. 1:59in the kitchen, flat against the wood,
80. 2:01chin up. He froze. "What are you doing?"
81. 2:02"Marking how tall you are." "Why?" "So
82. 2:04next spring we can see how much you
83. 2:05grew." "And the spring after that?" He
84. 2:07stared at the little pencil line by the
85. 2:08top of his head like it was something
86. 2:09dangerous. "You're going to leave it
87. 2:10there?" "It's not going anywhere.
88. 2:12Neither are you." He didn't say
89. 2:13anything, but that night, for the first
90. 2:14time, he let me untie one of his shoes
91. 2:16before bed. Just one. I didn't push it.
92. 2:18The next week he hung his coat on the
93. 2:19hook, crooked, but on the hook. A few
94. 2:20days later, he moved his chair from
95. 2:22beside the door to the middle of the
96. 2:23table, across from mine, without a word.
97. 2:25And one evening, he laughed so hard at
98. 2:27something dumb, I said that milk came
99. 2:28out of his nose, and he forgot to
100. 2:29apologize for the mess. He forgot. Then
101. 2:31last night, I got up for water and
102. 2:33passed his room. His door was open. He
103. 2:34was flat asleep, sprawled sideways,
104. 2:36blanket kicked half off, taking up the
105. 2:38whole bed like he owned it. And by the
106. 2:39front door, set neatly side by side,
107. 2:41were two scuffed sneakers, still laced,
108. 2:43empty. He'd taken them off on his own
109. 2:45without me telling him, without waiting
110. 2:46for me to leave the room. For the first
111. 2:47time since he walked in, he wasn't ready
112. 2:49to run. He never told me he felt safe.
113. 2:51He didn't have to. Two empty shoes by
114. 2:52the door said it louder than any promise
115. 2:54ever could.