Chelsea counseling Susan Dyad #1 — Transcript

Full transcript

1. 0:03Hi Susan. Thanks again um for going over
2. 0:06all the consent with me today.
3. 0:08Um do you want to get started on what
4. 0:10brings you here?
5. 0:12>> Um yeah, so
6. 0:16I've been
7. 0:18generally feeling a little lost um
8. 0:22lately.
9. 0:23Um not really sure what to do in life.
10. 0:28Um my mom passed away recently and I've
11. 0:32been taking care of her for the past 10
12. 0:35years.
13. 0:37Um she had Alzheimer's, so I was her
14. 0:40main caretaker um and I wasn't working
15. 0:44during that whole time.
16. 0:46Um around the same time my youngest
17. 0:50daughter went to college, so I moved in
18. 0:53with my mom to take care of her and all
19. 0:56my children are adults, so they're all
20. 0:58out of the house. Um
21. 1:01And I've been divorced for
22. 1:0520 years um
23. 1:08and yeah, I've just been pretty
24. 1:12lost with what to do with myself now
25. 1:15without my mom and um kind of not having
26. 1:20purpose
27. 1:21anymore in my days. Um so I was hoping
28. 1:25that maybe
29. 1:27you could help me out with that cuz I'm
30. 1:28feeling a little stuck.
31. 1:31>> Yeah, absolutely. What you're going to
32. 1:33do first I want to apologize and say I'm
33. 1:35so sorry for your loss. Um
34. 1:38I can only imagine the grief that you're
35. 1:39still um
36. 1:41struggling with.
37. 1:42And I hear that you said that you are
38. 1:45feeling lost and kind of not sure where
39. 1:48to go in life, which is completely
40. 1:50normal um for what you're going through
41. 1:51right now. It's definitely a lot on your
42. 1:53plate.
43. 1:54Um can you talk to me more about your
44. 1:57mom and um
45. 1:59your dynamic together?
46. 2:01>> Um, yeah, we are very close. Um,
47. 2:05especially since
48. 2:07um, you know, it it was just me and um
49. 2:11and single and my kids were gone. So,
50. 2:15um
51. 2:15and I wasn't working either. So, she was
52. 2:17pretty much my main
53. 2:19uh relationship in my life um, aside
54. 2:23from just
55. 2:25the main kind of um
56. 2:27responsibilities I had.
57. 2:29Um, she was pretty much the main
58. 2:32relationship in my life. So, so I do
59. 2:34have a sense of loneliness now also
60. 2:38now without her.
61. 2:41>> I can totally see that. Um
62. 2:44and that's completely valid. Um
63. 2:47what do you feel like outside of your
64. 2:49mom and your kids brings you joy?
65. 2:53>> Um
66. 2:55you know, that's something I I guess I'm
67. 2:58kind of struggling with now because I
68. 3:01just
69. 3:02um
70. 3:03it's been so long since I've
71. 3:06even been able to think about myself
72. 3:08since my focus has been on her. So, I
73. 3:10kind of just have uh no real motivation
74. 3:14anymore. I mostly just watch TV,
75. 3:17um stay home
76. 3:19uh scroll on my phone
77. 3:22um
78. 3:23>> Yeah.
79. 3:23>> Yeah.
80. 3:24>> Do you maybe there is something that you
81. 3:26and your mom did together? Uh
82. 3:29like go for walks or you know, maybe you
83. 3:32took her to the store or
84. 3:34um just memories that you have with her
85. 3:36that you could kind of still do um in
86. 3:39her honor and you know, to make you feel
87. 3:41connected to her and
88. 3:42um that that loneliness can ease, you
89. 3:45know, and you'll feel more connected on
90. 3:47that level.
91. 3:49Um
92. 3:50was there anything that you did together
93. 3:52that kind of things about her?
94. 3:54>> Um, yeah, actually we I would take her
95. 3:57to the park
96. 3:59every once in a while to to get her
97. 4:01outside and we would go walking.
98. 4:05So, that's that's a nice idea. Though we
99. 4:08have a park that we would go to nearby
100. 4:10all the time. So, maybe I could just uh
101. 4:15go and
102. 4:16take a walk out there in the mornings or
103. 4:19something.
104. 4:20>> Maybe try it just once or twice a week
105. 4:22and kind of just talk to her, you know,
106. 4:25bring a journal or just talk, you know,
107. 4:27in your mind.
108. 4:29See how that feels in your body and like
109. 4:31connect with her in that way.
110. 4:33I think that could be a special thing
111. 4:35for you try.
112. 4:38>> Yeah, yeah, I like that. Um,
113. 4:41especially since
114. 4:42that'll get me give me a reason to get
115. 4:45me out of the out of the house and uh
116. 4:48I could use some exercise since
117. 4:51you know, especially towards the end of
118. 4:53her Alzheimer's we stayed home majority
119. 4:57of the time. So, we weren't going to the
120. 5:00park as much as we were in her earlier
121. 5:03stages. So,
122. 5:05um, yeah, I could I could definitely do
123. 5:08that.
124. 5:09>> Awesome. I wanted to go back to the
125. 5:11divorce and uh your kids a little bit.
126. 5:14Um,
127. 5:16could you tell me more about the
128. 5:17divorce? I know you said it was 20 years
129. 5:19ago. Um,
130. 5:21what made you guys divorce?
131. 5:25>> Um, well, I was very focused on my
132. 5:31children and
133. 5:33taking care of them and my husband
134. 5:37worked a lot and so we kind of just
135. 5:41became distant
136. 5:43with him being away a lot, but he did
137. 5:47have to um support our family, so I
138. 5:50understand that. But uh yeah, our our
139. 5:52relationship just
140. 5:55um went pretty stale after a while, and
141. 5:59we decided to go our separate ways.
142. 6:03>> Yeah, so I'm hearing that um
143. 6:06you decided to go your separate ways,
144. 6:07the relationship's kind of fading out,
145. 6:09fizzling out
146. 6:11um with the stressors of life and kids.
147. 6:13It's very common.
148. 6:14>> Yeah.
149. 6:15>> Um
150. 6:16do your kids um
151. 6:18do you feel like your kids are closer
152. 6:19with you now, or how has that
153. 6:22relationship changed with your kids?
154. 6:23Like how old were they when
155. 6:25you got divorced?
156. 6:27>> Well,
157. 6:28we were we were really close um because
158. 6:31I was, you know, a stay-at-home mom, and
159. 6:34I was taking care of them, and then as
160. 6:36they got older, you know, they they went
161. 6:38away to college, especially um
162. 6:41my youngest. So they're they're not in
163. 6:44the same town as me, so they're not
164. 6:46nearby, and they live their own adult
165. 6:49lives, and the older ones have jobs, and
166. 6:53so, you know, I don't really want to
167. 6:54bother them too much. I know they're all
168. 6:57busy, but they do call in and and check
169. 7:00on me every once in a while um to make
170. 7:03sure I'm okay, but unfortunately,
171. 7:06they're not near me where
172. 7:10um
173. 7:11I can see them, or they can they can
174. 7:13visit, so I do miss them a lot, um but I
175. 7:18don't I don't want to bother them.
176. 7:21Yeah.
177. 7:22>> Yeah, thank you for sharing that. Um I
178. 7:24just kind of wanted to see that dynamic.
179. 7:26Um
180. 7:27yeah, have any of them reached out
181. 7:30regarding your mom bill? Like I'm hoping
182. 7:31that you do have some kind of phone
183. 7:34relationship with them, or that you can
184. 7:36call them if you do have those phone
185. 7:38lines.
186. 7:38>> Yeah.
187. 7:39Yeah, they have been very supportive.
188. 7:43They have
189. 7:45expressed some concern for me. So,
190. 7:49I started I have started
191. 7:51checking on myself and going to the
192. 7:52doctor and and actually the doctor did
193. 7:55refer me
194. 7:58to come to you and start therapy just
195. 8:00because
196. 8:02Yeah, I guess
197. 8:03you know.
198. 8:05>> That's great. I'm so proud of you for
199. 8:06coming and
200. 8:07it takes a lot especially with you're
201. 8:09dealing with and hopefully we can
202. 8:11facilitate a great journey together and
203. 8:14you know, work on you getting back to
204. 8:16your passions and feeling that sense of
205. 8:18joy again.
206. 8:20So, I really would like you to start
207. 8:21with yeah, the park visits and see how
208. 8:24that feels in our next session.
209. 8:26And then just like reflect on
210. 8:29those feelings that you can talk to your
211. 8:32mom in that sense of
212. 8:34connection in the park.
213. 8:37>> Yeah, thank you.
214. 8:39I do I do think that will help me a lot.
215. 8:41Um
216. 8:42and I I am interested in
217. 8:45in
218. 8:46working together and
219. 8:49I feel like that was a good suggestion
220. 8:51for me. So, I would want to
221. 8:54stick with that and and
222. 8:56share with you my experience.
223. 8:59>> Great. Thank you so much. And yeah, we
224. 9:01can dive deeper into other modalities
225. 9:03and things as we continue to develop our
226. 9:06relationship and I learn more about you,
227. 9:08but
228. 9:09again, I'm so sorry for your loss and um
229. 9:12you know, it's a big step for you going
230. 9:14to therapy and grief you know, comes in
231. 9:18waves and I'm just
232. 9:19happy to assist you with this journey.
233. 9:23So, nice to meet you again and thanks
234. 9:25for the first session.
235. 9:26>> Thank you.
236. 9:28>> You too. See you then.