Alex Jones Made A Video Game — Transcript

Full transcript

1. 0:00all right you guys ready let's do
2. 0:05it controls WD space to jump and
3. 0:11shoot little Dr fuker has hatched a plan
4. 0:14to turn everyone into a gay Frog by
5. 0:16injecting you with an mRNA lgbtq tadpole
6. 0:19technology vaccine that depletes your
7. 0:21testosterone and turns you into a
8. 0:23rainbow
9. 0:27amphibi wait what
10. 0:34okay I'm here to save the beagles
11. 0:39stop so you can jump
12. 0:47around
13. 0:51okay oh my God are these scientists with
14. 0:55[ __ ] are these scientists with
15. 0:58vaccines
16. 1:00oh my [ __ ] god what is
17. 1:03thisne 50 years
18. 1:05ago
19. 1:08what oh I got to shoot that guy there we
20. 1:10go okay we got him all right now what
21. 1:13but the moon landing was a
22. 1:19host oh I got to get the guys behind me
23. 1:21okay are I
24. 1:26good oh oh oh God bro he almost got me
25. 1:29wait is that the moon landing was a h is
26. 1:32that what I think it
27. 1:47was oh my [ __ ]
28. 1:49God all
29. 1:55[Music]
30. 1:58right
31. 2:02[Music]
32. 2:07I can't believe
33. 2:11this I got a lot of points for that
34. 2:17one wait oh [ __ ] oh I lost my other big
35. 2:23gun I don't think it even
36. 2:27matters okay they're all dead
37. 2:32there we go
38. 2:33good say hello to my little friend oh I
39. 2:37see so this is I've got ammo for this oh
40. 2:43no
41. 2:45wait what do I do
42. 2:56now I have to break it
43. 2:58down
44. 3:03got it nice nice okay we're good machine
45. 3:08gun wait what's this virgin billionaire
46. 3:12I'm going to lower the world's
47. 3:19population oh my
48. 3:22God I'm going to lower the world's
49. 3:27population oh my gosh stupid [ __ ] I'll
50. 3:31eat your wait oh [ __ ] I died I I'm going
51. 3:34to lower the world's
52. 3:37population and he shoots money at
53. 3:41you oh I destroyed him I beat him I
54. 3:44thought you did computers
55. 3:53libtard this is really something
56. 3:56special let me move my camera down a bit
57. 4:01actually I'll move it up yeah that
58. 4:04should be
59. 4:05better
60. 4:10okay is that a dog I'll eat your ass
61. 4:25what oh my god oh I got him machine gun
62. 4:32nice okay he's
63. 4:38dead oh
64. 4:47my wait I don't how do I get
65. 4:56him the moon landing was a h
66. 5:04dude I'm actually beating it I'm feeling
67. 5:07good man woo I've got to be slow though
68. 5:10say hello to my little
69. 5:15friend oh jeez
70. 5:17okay okay got him
71. 5:20good they're tur
72. 5:25freaking okay got
73. 5:28him
74. 5:30I think I should wait for him to shoot
75. 5:35right wait wait he can use a
76. 5:40knife
77. 5:41what say hello to my little
78. 5:48friend Dr fer who reportedly created HIV
79. 5:52in a lab made HIV in a
80. 5:55lab wait oh [ __ ] I get it I get it
81. 6:05oh okay I thought I I thought I was
82. 6:07supposed to shoot it okay put on your
83. 6:09mask
84. 6:14PE was the game
85. 6:18lagging I mean this is some pretty high
86. 6:20octane gameplay it makes
87. 6:28sense
88. 6:32uh-oh uhoh he's moving
89. 6:39up ooh
90. 6:43ooh I should have gotten ready to go
91. 6:47down oh got
92. 6:50him
93. 6:53nice wait there's dog it's fouy of
94. 6:58course
95. 7:00of
96. 7:01course of [ __ ] course complete
97. 7:05naturally wait I beat
98. 7:11it it's over
99. 7:149,000 new
100. 7:25record
101. 7:27crazy the big Tech crybaby tyrants have
102. 7:30banned us all locked us in our virtual
103. 7:33cages they're not human and they're
104. 7:35wiping us off the face of the Earth with
105. 7:36a smile on their satanic faces but I can
106. 7:39stop it I am prepared to single-handedly
107. 7:42defeat big Tech lizard nerd and free the
108. 7:45Patriotic Americans from the mass
109. 7:47censorship
110. 7:53now San
111. 7:56Francisco wait is that a crap is that
112. 7:58some is that a crack on F you can't
113. 8:01silence me libtards I'll destroy you
114. 8:12wait oh my
115. 8:15God
116. 8:18okay oh and RIS couldn't shoot through
117. 8:22that global warming of the
118. 8:25host
119. 8:28what
120. 8:30okay I'll give it a
121. 8:35minute uh-oh uh-oh now things are
122. 8:38getting
123. 8:40serious wait there's a frog I didn't see
124. 8:43the
125. 8:45Frog okay so I can jump down wait it's
126. 8:50another wait am I just am I just running
127. 8:53around with the machine gun shooting
128. 8:55homeless
129. 8:57people what
130. 9:03say hello to my little friend wait oh
131. 9:07no
132. 9:16woo okay oh man that was rough oh it's a
133. 9:21generator oh [ __ ] the moon landing was a
134. 9:25hoax if I step in this do I die no it
135. 9:28just slows me okay
136. 9:30wait oh
137. 9:37my oh it's another frog okay we got
138. 9:41him all right let's get another one of
139. 9:43these Machine
140. 9:50Gun Man uh hopefully the game awards
141. 9:53will be able to add this in uh before uh
142. 9:56before it comes out you know
143. 10:00wo you know cuz like they've gotten
144. 10:02until December uh December
145. 10:067th
146. 10:08okay there we
147. 10:10go all
148. 10:13right shoot them there we
149. 10:18go wow these globalists are taking over
150. 10:22man the
151. 10:26Joe no
152. 10:36[Music]
153. 10:37no
154. 10:40yep yep these homeless zombies are
155. 10:47disgusting oh God this game is truly
156. 10:52fascinating them oh my
157. 10:57God machine gun
158. 11:05all
159. 11:14right okay oh is it a
160. 11:17boss wait that's a lot of frogs I'll eat
161. 11:20your
162. 11:24uh-oh oh
163. 11:26god oh no more frogs
164. 11:35wait I I beat it oh I was easy I'm a
165. 11:39God wait they're turning the freaking
166. 11:42frogs
167. 11:50G machine
168. 11:53gun okay oh oh [ __ ] warming is a
169. 11:57h Je Jesus there's a lot of them bro
170. 12:01they'll really mob you
171. 12:07down oh it's
172. 12:09a what are they even shooting at
173. 12:15me I'm trying to get that guy from the
174. 12:17top but I don't think I can I'm going to
175. 12:18have to just hit him from
176. 12:21there got him okay
177. 12:24good machine
178. 12:27gun
179. 12:32there we go there we go no big
180. 12:36deal I think that they didn't expect me
181. 12:39to be able to do
182. 12:41this okay I beat it that was pretty easy
183. 12:44I mean to be fair that wasn't even a
184. 12:45boss
185. 12:47right they're turning the freaking
186. 12:50frog
187. 12:54okay
188. 12:56okay good
189. 12:59I feel like I'm actually doing really
190. 13:02well oh [ __ ] this the
191. 13:05boss Paul M that 50 years
192. 13:17ago Jesus it's a lot of
193. 13:22mobs that was actually kind of
194. 13:27hard
195. 13:29am I really just blowing up a
196. 13:33[ __ ] kill
197. 13:35them oh my
198. 13:41God they're turning the freaking frogs
199. 13:44here okay all right there we go oh [ __ ]
200. 13:48oh [ __ ] this is the boss I don't have a
201. 13:50machine gun anymore though okay never
202. 13:51mind I'm good say hello to my little
203. 13:56friend wait are those the January 6 Pro
204. 13:59it says magga
205. 14:092024 big Tech jail wait so can I let him
206. 14:14out let's free the Patriots and
207. 14:19Def okay G oh my God try
208. 14:26again I didn't realiz just was
209. 14:32okay there we go all right I got it I
210. 14:35figured it
211. 14:39out you will join the
212. 14:43Matrix okay let's move out of this this
213. 14:46is hard okay
214. 14:48guys no no no no no no
215. 14:53[ __ ] and then realiz he's going to come
216. 14:55there with the hand
217. 14:57man okay there we go
218. 15:01hey got
219. 15:05run
220. 15:08okay going I run away oh no no no I'm
221. 15:10good I'm good I'll kill him I'm going to
222. 15:11kill him I'm going to beat him beat him
223. 15:18nice you suck big Tech lizard nerd I'm
224. 15:22saving the patr mission
225. 15:27complete
226. 15:36new
227. 15:47record there it
228. 15:50is there it
229. 15:53is all all right we saved them
230. 15:57all
231. 15:59Jeffrey Epstein may be dead but his
232. 16:01island is still ripe and full of
233. 16:03pedophiles and satanic child sacrifice
234. 16:06babies are being kidnapped and are being
235. 16:08turned into a stew for the global Elites
236. 16:10to eat so they can live forever crooked
237. 16:12witch the W is leading the charge and I
238. 16:15am going to get between her and those
239. 16:16poor babies they will not be turned into
240. 16:19stew not on my watch oh my [ __ ]
241. 16:24God all right here we
242. 16:27go
243. 16:29ready
244. 16:31fste go save the
245. 16:40babies oh there wait it's actually
246. 16:44zombies There's
247. 16:48skeletons okay that's
248. 16:51dead oh
249. 16:53[ __ ] oh they they Roo to my little
250. 16:57friend
251. 16:59now
252. 17:00what global warming is a
253. 17:04host I'm glad they added that in
254. 17:07there in case you know you didn't know
255. 17:10that wait what the
256. 17:15[ __ ] they're turning the freaking th G
257. 17:19Jesus okay all right we're fine we're
258. 17:21fine to be fair they almost got my ass
259. 17:23though say hello to my little oh it's
260. 17:25the bats from Co of course how could I
261. 17:29possibly what the
262. 17:34[ __ ] that was
263. 17:37easy okay we got him giant
264. 17:40skeleton
265. 17:43naturally oh
266. 17:49[ __ ] okay got it there we go there we go
267. 17:52oh big dick big dick big dick big dick
268. 17:55big
269. 17:57dick got his
270. 17:59ass the elites don't want you to know
271. 18:01this but the Ducks the par are free you
272. 18:04can take them home I have 550 oh there
273. 18:07it is there it is bro I destroyed that
274. 18:08what the hell even was that I don't even
275. 18:09know what that
276. 18:11was wait what's
277. 18:15that wait is that a bottle of
278. 18:27testosterone
279. 18:28I I'm pretty sure it's super male
280. 18:31Vitality super male Vitality activated
281. 18:35oh [ __ ] I
282. 18:39died I don't even know what it does
283. 18:42[ __ ] machine gun I'll have to replay the
284. 18:49game oh big deal no way down where are
285. 18:54the cigars no
286. 18:57way oh they spawn Ms oh I
287. 19:01[Applause]
288. 19:04see I did not have sexual relation to
289. 19:07that
290. 19:09saxophone yeah wait oh I got another
291. 19:16one wait how do I beat him where are the
292. 19:26cigars dude
293. 19:29Get Wrecked dude this one's actually
294. 19:31hard where are the
295. 19:36cigars oh I got
296. 19:42it I did not have sexual relations for
297. 19:46that
298. 19:48warming
299. 19:56okay dude
300. 19:59[ __ ] I'm getting farmed by Bill
301. 20:01[ __ ] Clint are you kidding
302. 20:04[Applause]
303. 20:11me 911 was an
304. 20:14inside he's a [ __ ]
305. 20:23Necromancer Jesus Christ he's destroying
306. 20:26me where are the cigars H oh I got wait
307. 20:30I I beat him I [ __ ] beat him
308. 20:35nice that was
309. 20:37rough
310. 20:39yeah wait I'm here to save the poor
311. 20:42innocent
312. 20:57babies let's
313. 21:00go say hello to my little
314. 21:04friend uh-oh Jones you are a tremendous
315. 21:13Warrior we are going to defeat the
316. 21:16globalists very bigly believe me believe
317. 21:20me Alex you are a patriot say hello my
318. 21:25oh my god oh [ __ ] it's another one of
319. 21:27these
320. 21:29[Music]
321. 21:31okay got him okay that was easy no big
322. 21:36deal all right Trump's going to save us
323. 21:39he's got laser vision right to my let me
324. 21:42see what does he do holy
325. 21:45[ __ ] dude Trump is
326. 21:48op look at those fake News Gay frogs
327. 21:55wow oh my God
328. 22:08say hello to my okay what's
329. 22:12this oh he lasered it
330. 22:14nice okay super male vitality
331. 22:25[Music]
332. 22:26activ
333. 22:32no
334. 22:33way no way it's not about to be it's not
335. 22:37about the Crooked witch belongs inell
336. 22:40all right let's
337. 22:43go I came out he died how do I get out
338. 22:48of
339. 22:49that okay okay I got it that's
340. 22:52[Music]
341. 22:55easy i k my
342. 22:59that 50 years
343. 23:01ago
344. 23:03[Music]
345. 23:06okay okay running out
346. 23:09easy I came I saw he die Jesus
347. 23:19Christ okay I came I saw he die there we
348. 23:26go
349. 23:31I think she just die here
350. 23:32right
351. 23:36nice what's so funny now dumb
352. 23:43witch mission
353. 23:56complete
354. 24:03record Game of the Year clearly I mean
355. 24:09clearly interactive
356. 24:13propaganda yeah maybe we'll have the CCC
357. 24:16the CCP make a video game after this
358. 24:18that's to play that one
359. 24:21too oh my
360. 24:23God all
361. 24:26right
362. 24:28continue Castro Jr is on the loose
363. 24:31trying to force experimental shots while
364. 24:33looking like a fruit cake in the process
365. 24:36the Canadian truckers are the oppressive
366. 24:38Canadian government all of their funds
367. 24:41have been frozen by the new old order
368. 24:42Banks until the C were lent Castro Jr
369. 24:46must be
370. 24:49overthrown no man this the trucker Union
371. 24:52the Canada
372. 24:55protest ready wait I'm going to go I'm
373. 24:59going unfreeze their money you Comm to
374. 25:02scumbags
375. 25:06wait say hello to my little friend I
376. 25:09feel like blowing up their trucks isn't
377. 25:10really part of the message though
378. 25:15right uh-oh
379. 25:17uh-oh got
380. 25:20him okay breaking this one nice nice
381. 25:24nice oops death C stop I didn't know
382. 25:29going to come down that
383. 25:32fast okay I can't quite to 1984 is
384. 25:381776 the [ __ ] the Pi's
385. 25:46Morgan
386. 25:48oops wait these gay FS are really
387. 25:51grossing me out what is going on no way
388. 25:56preppy news
389. 25:58machine
390. 26:01Alex oh my God Alex Jones you are a hero
391. 26:07Jesus
392. 26:09Christ we got it now we figured it
393. 26:12out there we go
394. 26:16ooh oh we got blow up the what even is
395. 26:20that I don't know but it's
396. 26:23gone Alex Jones is saving the
397. 26:26world
398. 26:31oh my
399. 26:33God it's a fake helicopter yeah
400. 26:39naturally uh-oh uh-oh
401. 26:45uh-oh got him
402. 26:52nice
403. 26:56okay
404. 27:00okay I have to have high levels of of
405. 27:02spatial awareness for this this is very
406. 27:04hard it's the fake news chest what will
407. 27:08I do you're just locked in your house
408. 27:11wait machine oops oops death can't
409. 27:20stop no oh I got him talking about your
410. 27:23right the fake News Network oh I see it
411. 27:27now
412. 27:31it's
413. 27:34fnn oh nice okay now what oh now I now
414. 27:38I'm on the road oh [ __ ]
415. 27:42okay it's
416. 27:45flamethrower
417. 27:47what
418. 27:53yeah they're turning the freaking frogs
419. 27:56Alpha power
420. 28:02what the
421. 28:07rats
422. 28:08oh got him okay good I almost got got
423. 28:12there but I
424. 28:15didn't okay
425. 28:19good oh
426. 28:26no
427. 28:31okay got
428. 28:33him bro where all these rats come from
429. 28:36holy
430. 28:38[ __ ]
431. 28:45Jesus there's so many [ __ ]
432. 28:49rats uh do I have to destroy
433. 28:53this yeah
434. 28:56okay that says it says fake
435. 29:00news okay got it
436. 29:06nice okay flamethrower they're turning
437. 29:09the freaking frogs game all right there
438. 29:12we go good they're all
439. 29:15dead global warming is a host there we
440. 29:20go okay kill these guys oh
441. 29:25[ __ ] okay destroying that one come on no
442. 29:30got to get both of them AOE farming
443. 29:32there we go oh around
444. 29:34it
445. 29:36nice but I feel like I'm actually doing
446. 29:38really
447. 29:41well Alp I don't know why are there
448. 29:45rats easy yeah for sure
449. 29:49[ __ ] okay we'll destroy this one
450. 29:56first
451. 29:59come on got him okay that we go I can't
452. 30:04go down there we
453. 30:12go
454. 30:14okay well I can just run through those
455. 30:16okay it's fine stupid o ooh I got hit
456. 30:20can't
457. 30:21stop okay got
458. 30:24him I I need an air Dash wait the
459. 30:27flamethrower okay flamethrower all right
460. 30:29we got it
461. 30:32good now
462. 30:34what this is going looking like it's
463. 30:35going to be a boss you're going down
464. 30:38Castro Jun oh my [ __ ] God we're
465. 30:40freezing your money for your
466. 30:43safety I'm just using a
467. 30:46flamethrower all right this is no big
468. 30:49deal I should be able to kill him pretty
469. 30:50fast with this then right oh I can blow
470. 30:53up the Rockets okay that makes it
471. 30:54[Music]
472. 30:56easier okay no one is taking a right
473. 31:02okay oh [ __ ] this is going to be intense
474. 31:05I got to be careful oops I forgot they
475. 31:08fell
476. 31:12down okay we're freezing your money for
477. 31:15your safety seizure no I don't think so
478. 31:19yeah I feel like it should be
479. 31:21fine yeah it's not that flashy wait
480. 31:24what's
481. 31:26this
482. 31:30bro he almost caught
483. 31:36me nice why beat
484. 31:38him easy we're freezing your money for
485. 31:43safety there it is mission complete Dam
486. 31:48now you know who the last boss is going
487. 31:49to be
488. 31:55right it's going to be George S
489. 31:58it's it's got to be George Soros there's
490. 32:00no way it's not going to be George
491. 32:07Soros
492. 32:08mhm okay here we
493. 32:11go this is it folks the New World Order
494. 32:15headquarters where every slimy dirty
495. 32:17traitorous no good lying scumback
496. 32:19Hitlers do their planning oh my God Dao
497. 32:23Switzerland they're scheduled to drop a
498. 32:25gay frog nuke
499. 32:29musi and their rule will be Eternal they
500. 32:32want us to eat the bugs they want us to
501. 32:35live in a pod they want us to be gay and
502. 32:37I say no never will I bow to Satan this
503. 32:41is a war on our souls a war on
504. 32:46God there it
505. 32:49is all
506. 32:52right
507. 32:55ready go hello
508. 32:59Global oh [ __ ] oh wait wow there's a lot
509. 33:02of [ __ ]
510. 33:03here okay all
511. 33:06right oh the answer to 1984 is
512. 33:131776
513. 33:15okay got him all right no
514. 33:19problem oh
515. 33:21[ __ ] I'll eat your
516. 33:24ass okay got him
517. 33:31[Music]
518. 33:33okay wait why are there cat as big mik
519. 33:36being a woman what the hell's wrong with
520. 33:38the
521. 33:40cat what the cat ever
522. 33:44do maybe it's just an aggressive cat
523. 33:47get
524. 33:51[ __ ]
525. 33:55okay
526. 33:59all
527. 34:09righty Jesus this thing's hard to kill
528. 34:11there we go okay we got
529. 34:15it nice
530. 34:19okay
531. 34:20okay how do I how do I hit
532. 34:23them just shoot
533. 34:25up
534. 34:30okay say hello to my little
535. 34:33friend [ __ ] I didn't see that
536. 34:41one okay give me a minute no I'm not
537. 34:43dead I'm not dead I've got plenty of
538. 34:45lives I'll be fine I either I I even got
539. 34:47the super male Vitality so now I have
540. 34:49more lives wait what the
541. 34:53[ __ ] global warming is a host
542. 34:59stupid [ __ ] I'll eat
543. 35:03your
544. 35:06okay got him
545. 35:11nice I'm going to be honest that was
546. 35:13kind of
547. 35:17hard this is as fake as big mik being a
548. 35:20woman Al power there we
549. 35:25go
550. 35:29okay avoid that no problem 911 was an
551. 35:34inside job was a control
552. 35:37de good machine
553. 35:42gun no big
554. 35:44deal
555. 35:46super
556. 35:47wow bro I I'm
557. 35:51stacked
558. 35:54[ __ ] see what' I tell you guys I was
559. 36:00right yep I knew we will build an open
560. 36:06Society damn that was
561. 36:09easy bro I thought he was going to be
562. 36:11way harder that's a
563. 36:14dop
564. 36:18yeah
565. 36:24okay
566. 36:25okay
567. 36:31okay got him Jesus this shit's there's a
568. 36:35lot of stuff
569. 36:38here
570. 36:41okay got
571. 36:48him got him
572. 36:51nice
573. 36:55yeah
574. 37:01okay we're doing really
575. 37:08well okay we're getting to the lava area
576. 37:11this is probably
577. 37:16uh-oh okay let me kill these things
578. 37:21first
579. 37:25kill
580. 37:31okay got him Jesus there's a lot of
581. 37:34stuff on the [ __ ] screen holy [ __ ]
582. 37:36these [ __ ]
583. 37:38bats okay there we go trying to give me
584. 37:42Co
585. 37:43obviously I can't hit
586. 37:48him okay we're
587. 37:54good
588. 37:55okay
589. 37:57stupid [ __ ] oo I got hit I thought I
590. 38:00could jump over it I [ __ ] up the elite
591. 38:03don't want you to know this the Ducks of
592. 38:05the Barker free you can take them home I
593. 38:08have 558
594. 38:10Ducks
595. 38:12what the ducks in the Parker are
596. 38:19free they don't want you to I guess
597. 38:22not I mean to be fair I didn't really
598. 38:26the Moon Landing was a host I mean I I I
599. 38:29don't know super Vitality I know
600. 38:33that
601. 38:37super oh
602. 38:40[ __ ] oh
603. 38:50[ __ ] giant puic octopus wait
604. 38:55what
605. 39:00is this
606. 39:02cthulu oh [ __ ] I didn't even realize
607. 39:04that could
608. 39:08happen
609. 39:12okay it's the Illuminati yes apparently
610. 39:15death wait of course yeah it's the
611. 39:19Illuminati
612. 39:23naturally okay I get it now
613. 39:34okay easy
614. 39:38enough this is
615. 39:40easy we beat the aluminati just like
616. 39:43that holy [ __ ] I thought it was going to
617. 39:45be way harder oh [ __ ] I wasn't paying
618. 39:47attention I was reading
619. 39:51chat I did it I destroyed it yeah yeah
620. 39:56yeah Alpha
621. 39:58power machine
622. 40:02gun no the New World Order is taking
623. 40:06over and the resistance is futile no bro
624. 40:09I thought this [ __ ] was
625. 40:14over oh my God okay we got him we got
626. 40:17him we got him this one's hard but we're
627. 40:19going to be able to do
628. 40:22it you will live it's okay it's okay we
629. 40:25got it
630. 40:32there it
631. 40:38is you will be happy there we go there
632. 40:41we go big
633. 40:45damage
634. 40:47nice oops death can
635. 40:52stop oh it can push you off I get it
636. 40:57I beat
637. 41:05him the New World Order is no
638. 41:10more
639. 41:12what
640. 41:16what mission complete
641. 41:25all
642. 41:31new
643. 41:32record I saved us all I did I did that
644. 41:36for you the funny thing is that it
645. 41:38actually kind of is a bit it is a bit
646. 41:40better than I had
647. 41:42expected I expected it to be way worse
648. 41:45to be honest with you I
649. 41:47did um weapon all honestly better than I
650. 41:50had expected yeah it's lore accurate it
651. 41:53is yeah
652. 41:55um god tier gaming right there
653. 41:58absolutely music's great yeah better
654. 42:01than
655. 42:03shadowlands yeah