泰勒絲讓你少走人生彎路｜感到徬徨無助時請聽聽這個！｜紐約大學演講 — Transcript

Full transcript

1. 0:00[Music]
2. 0:01Hi, I'm Taylor.
3. 0:03[Applause]
4. 0:07Last time I was in a stadium this size,
5. 0:10I was dancing in heels and wearing a
6. 0:12glittery leotard.
7. 0:16This outfit is much more comfortable.
8. 0:20I would like to say a huge thank you to
9. 0:23NYU's chairman of the board of trustees,
10. 0:26Bill Berkeley, and all the trustees and
11. 0:30members of the board, NYU's president,
12. 0:32Andrew Hamilton, Provost, Katherine
13. 0:36Fleming,
14. 0:38and the faculty and alumni here today
15. 0:41who have made this day possible.
16. 0:43I feel so proud to share this day with
17. 0:48my fellow honores Susan Hawkfield and
18. 0:51Felix Moss Rodriguez who humble me with
19. 0:55the ways they improve our world with
20. 0:57their work.
21. 1:06As for me, I'm 90% sure the main reason
22. 1:10I'm here is because I have a song called
23. 1:1222.
24. 1:20And let me just say I am elated to be
25. 1:26here with you today as we celebrate and
26. 1:28graduate New York University's class of
27. 1:312022.
28. 1:41>> Not a single one of us here today has
29. 1:43done it alone. We are each a patchwork
30. 1:46quilt of those who have loved us. Those
31. 1:50who have believed in our futures. Those
32. 1:52who showed us empathy and kindness or
33. 1:56told us the truth even when it wasn't
34. 1:58easy to hear.
35. 2:00Those who told us we could do it when
36. 2:02there was absolutely no proof of that.
37. 2:06Someone read stories to you and taught
38. 2:10you to dream and offered up some moral
39. 2:14code of right and wrong for you to try
40. 2:16and live by.
41. 2:18Someone tried their best to explain
42. 2:22every concept in this insanely complex
43. 2:24world to the child that was you. As you
44. 2:27asked a bazillion questions like, "How
45. 2:30does the moon work?" and "Why can we eat
46. 2:33salad but not grass?
47. 2:37And maybe they didn't do it perfectly.
48. 2:40No one ever can.
49. 2:42Maybe they aren't with us anymore. In
50. 2:44that case, I hope you'll remember them
51. 2:46today.
52. 2:47If they are in this stadium, I hope
53. 2:49you'll find your own way to express your
54. 2:52gratitude for all the steps and missteps
55. 2:56that have led us to this common
56. 2:59destination.
57. 3:01[Applause]
58. 3:08I know that words are supposed to be my
59. 3:10thing, but I will never be able to find
60. 3:12the words to thank my mom and dad, my
61. 3:15brother Austin, for the sacrifices they
62. 3:17made every day so I could go from
63. 3:20singing in coffee houses to standing up
64. 3:22here with you all today because no words
65. 3:25would ever be enough.
66. 3:32to all the incredible parents, family
67. 3:35members, mentors, teachers, allies,
68. 3:40friends, and loved ones here today who
69. 3:42have supported these students in their
70. 3:44pursuit of educational enrichment.
71. 3:48Let me say to you now, welcome to New
72. 3:51York. It's been waiting for you.
73. 4:03I'd like to thank NYU for making me
74. 4:06technically
75. 4:08on paper at least
76. 4:11a doctor.
77. 4:13[Applause]
78. 4:18Not the type of doctor you would want
79. 4:20around in case of an emergency.
80. 4:23Unless your specific emergency was that
81. 4:26you desperately needed to hear a song
82. 4:28with a catchy hook and an intensely
83. 4:30cathartic bridge section.
84. 4:38Or if your emergency was that you needed
85. 4:41a person who can name over 50 breeds of
86. 4:44cats in one minute.
87. 4:46[Applause]
88. 4:49I never got to have a normal college
89. 4:53experience, per se. I went to public
90. 4:55high school until 10th grade and then
91. 4:58finished my education doing homeschool
92. 5:00work on the floors of airport terminals.
93. 5:03Then I went out out on the road for
94. 5:06radio tour, which sounds incredibly
95. 5:08glamorous, but in reality it consisted
96. 5:12of a rental car, motel, and my mom and I
97. 5:16pretending to have loud mother-daughter
98. 5:19fights with each other during boarding
99. 5:21so no one would want the empty seat
100. 5:23between us on Southwest.
101. 5:27As a kid, I always thought I would go
102. 5:30away to college, imagining the posters I
103. 5:33would hang on the wall of my freshman
104. 5:35dorm. I even set the ending of my music
105. 5:39video from my song Love Story at my
106. 5:42fantasy imaginary college where I meet a
107. 5:46male model reading a book on the grass
108. 5:49and with one single glance, we realized
109. 5:52we had been in love in our past lives.
110. 5:57which is exactly what you guys all
111. 5:59experienced at some point in the last
112. 6:01four years, right?
113. 6:03[Applause]
114. 6:07But I really can't complain about not
115. 6:10having a normal college experience to
116. 6:12you because you went to NYU during a
117. 6:16global pandemic, being essentially
118. 6:19locked into your dorms and having to do
119. 6:22classes over Zoom. Everyone in college
120. 6:25during normal times stresses about test
121. 6:28scores, but on top of that, you also had
122. 6:31to pass like a thousand COVID tests.
123. 6:36I imagine the idea of a normal college
124. 6:39experience was all you wanted to. But in
125. 6:43this case, you and I both learned that
126. 6:47you don't always get all the things in
127. 6:49the bag that you selected from the menu
128. 6:52in the delivery surface that is life.
129. 6:56You get what you get.
130. 6:58And as I would like to say to you
131. 7:01wholeheartedly, you should be very proud
132. 7:04of what you've done with it. Today,
133. 7:08you leave New York University and then
134. 7:11go out into the world searching what's
135. 7:13next. And so will I.
136. 7:18[Applause]
137. 7:25So, as a rule,
138. 7:27I try not to give anyone unsolicited
139. 7:31advice unless they ask for it. I'll go
140. 7:34into this more later. I guess I have
141. 7:37been officially solicited in this
142. 7:39situation to impart whatever wisdom I
143. 7:43might have to tell you things that have
144. 7:45helped me so far in my life. Please bear
145. 7:48in mind that I in no way feel qualified
146. 7:52to tell you what to do. You've worked
147. 7:56and struggled and sacrificed and studied
148. 7:59and dreamed your way here today.
149. 8:03And so you know what you're doing.
150. 8:06You'll do things differently than I did
151. 8:08them and for different reasons.
152. 8:11So I won't tell you what to do because
153. 8:13no one likes that. I will however give
154. 8:16you some life hacks I wish I knew when I
155. 8:19was starting out my dreams of a career
156. 8:22and navigating life, love, pressure,
157. 8:26choices, shame, hope, and friendship.
158. 8:31The first of which is
159. 8:33Life can be heavy, especially if you try
160. 8:38to carry it all at once.
161. 8:40Part of growing up and moving into new
162. 8:43chapters of your life is about catch and
163. 8:46release.
164. 8:48What I mean by that is knowing what
165. 8:50things to keep and what things to
166. 8:53release. You can't carry all things. All
167. 8:58grudges, all updates on your ex, all
168. 9:02enviable promotions your school bully
169. 9:04got at the hedge fund his uncle started.
170. 9:10Decide what is yours to hold and let the
171. 9:14rest go. Oftentimes, the good things in
172. 9:17your life are lighter anyway, so there's
173. 9:20more room for them. One toxic
174. 9:22relationship can outweigh so many
175. 9:25wonderful simple joys. You get to pick
176. 9:29what your life has time and room for. Be
177. 9:33discerning.
178. 9:36Secondly,
179. 9:38learn to live alongside
180. 9:41cringe.
181. 9:44[Applause]
182. 9:46No matter how hard you try to avoid
183. 9:49being cringe,
184. 9:52you will look back on your life and
185. 9:55cringe retrospectively.
186. 10:04Cringe is unavoidable over a lifetime.
187. 10:08Even the term cringe might someday be
188. 10:11deemed cringe.
189. 10:13I promise you, you're probably doing or
190. 10:17wearing something right now that you
191. 10:19will look back on later and find
192. 10:21revolting and hilarious.
193. 10:24You can't avoid it, so don't try to. For
194. 10:28example, I had a phase where for the
195. 10:31entirety of 2012, I dressed like a 1950s
196. 10:35house housewife.
197. 10:38But you know what? I was having fun.
198. 10:40Trends and phases are fun. Looking back
199. 10:44and laughing is fun.
200. 10:46And while we're talking about things
201. 10:48that make us squirm, but really
202. 10:50shouldn't, I'd like to say I'm a big
203. 10:53advocate for not hiding your enthusiasm
204. 10:56for things.
205. 11:06It seems to me that there is a false
206. 11:08stigma around eagerness in our culture
207. 11:12of unbothered
208. 11:14ambivalence.
209. 11:15This outlook perpetuates the idea that
210. 11:17it's not cool to want it. The people who
211. 11:20don't try are fundamentally more chic
212. 11:23than people who do. And I wouldn't know
213. 11:26because I've been a lot of things, but
214. 11:27I've never been an expert on chic. But
215. 11:30I'm the one who's up here, so you have
216. 11:32to listen to me when I say this.
217. 11:37Never be ashamed of trying.
218. 11:41Effortlessness
219. 11:43is a myth. The people who wanted it the
220. 11:46least were the ones I wanted to date and
221. 11:50be friends with in high school. The
222. 11:53people who want it the most
223. 11:55are the people I now hire to work for my
224. 11:58company.
225. 12:06I writed I started writing songs when I
226. 12:08was 12 and since then it's been the
227. 12:11compass guiding my life and in turn my
228. 12:15life guided my writing. Everything I do
229. 12:18is just an extension of my writing.
230. 12:21Whether it's direct directing videos or
231. 12:24a short film, creating the visuals for a
232. 12:26tour or standing on a stage performing,
233. 12:30everything is connected by my love of
234. 12:33the craft, the thrill of working through
235. 12:35ideas and narrowing them down and
236. 12:38polishing it all up in the end. Editing,
237. 12:41waking up in the middle of the night,
238. 12:42throwing out the old old idea because
239. 12:45you just thought of a new or better one
240. 12:46or a plot device that ties the whole
241. 12:49thing together. There's a reason they
242. 12:51call it a hook. Sometimes a string of
243. 12:53words just ins snares me and I can't
244. 12:57focus on anything until it's been
245. 12:59recorded or written down. As a
246. 13:02songwriter, I've never been able to sit
247. 13:04still or stay in one creative place for
248. 13:07too long. I've made and released 11
249. 13:10albums and in the process I've switched
250. 13:12genre from country to pop to alternative
251. 13:17to folk. And this might sound like a
252. 13:20very songwriter centric line of
253. 13:23discussion, but in a way I really do
254. 13:26think we are all writers.
255. 13:30And most of us write in a different
256. 13:33voice for different situations. You
257. 13:35write differently in your Instagram
258. 13:38stories than you do your senior thesis.
259. 13:40You send a different type of email to
260. 13:42your boss than you do your best friend
261. 13:44from home. We are all literary
262. 13:47chameleons and I think it's fascinating.
263. 13:51It's just a continuation of the idea
264. 13:53that we are so many things all the time.
265. 13:56And I know it can be really overwhelming
266. 13:59figuring out who to be and when. Who you
267. 14:03are now and how to act in order to get
268. 14:06where you want to go. I have some good
269. 14:09news. It's totally up to you.
270. 14:13I have some terrifying news.
271. 14:16It's totally up to you.
272. 14:20I said to you earlier that I don't ever
273. 14:23offer advice unless someone asks me for
274. 14:25it. And now I'll tell you why.
275. 14:28As a person who started my very public
276. 14:30career at the age of 15, it came with a
277. 14:33price. And that price was years of
278. 14:38unsolicited advice.
279. 14:41Being the youngest person in every room
280. 14:44for over a decade meant that I was
281. 14:47constantly being issued warnings from
282. 14:50older members of the music industry,
283. 14:53media, interviewers, executives, and
284. 14:56this advice
285. 14:58often presented itself as thinly veiled
286. 15:02warnings. See, I was a teenager
287. 15:05at a time when our society was
288. 15:07absolutely obsessed with the idea of
289. 15:10having perfect young female role models.
290. 15:15It felt like every interview I did
291. 15:19included slight barbs by the interviewer
292. 15:22about me one day running off the rails
293. 15:26and that meant a different per thing to
294. 15:28every person who said it to me. So, I
295. 15:31became a young adult while being fed the
296. 15:33message that if I didn't make any
297. 15:36mistakes,
298. 15:38all the children of America would grow
299. 15:41up to be perfect angels.
300. 15:46However, if I did slip up, the entire
301. 15:49Earth would fall off its axis and it
302. 15:51would be entirely my fault and I would
303. 15:52go to pop star jail forever and ever.
304. 15:57It was all centered around the idea that
305. 16:00mistakes
306. 16:02equal failure and ultimately the loss of
307. 16:08any chance at a happy or rewarding life.
308. 16:12This has not been my experience.
309. 16:16My experience has been that my mistakes
310. 16:20led to the best things in my life.
311. 16:24And being embarrassed when you mess up,
312. 16:27it's part of the human experience.
313. 16:29getting back up, dusting yourself off,
314. 16:33and seeing who still wants to hang out
315. 16:35with you afterward and laugh about it.
316. 16:37That's a gift.
317. 16:39The times I was told no or wasn't
318. 16:42included,
319. 16:44wasn't chosen, didn't win, didn't make
320. 16:46the cut. Looking back, it really feels
321. 16:50like those moments
322. 16:52were as important, if not more crucial,
323. 16:55than the moments I was told yes.
324. 16:58Not being invited to the parties and
325. 17:01sleepovers in my hometown made me feel
326. 17:05hopelessly lonely.
327. 17:07But because I felt alone, I would sit in
328. 17:10my room and write the songs that would
329. 17:12get me a ticket somewhere else. Having
330. 17:16label executives in Nashville tell me
331. 17:19that only 35year-old housewives listen
332. 17:22to country music and there was no place
333. 17:25for a 13-year-old on their roster.
334. 17:28made me cry in the car on the way home.
335. 17:31But then I'd post my songs on my MySpace
336. 17:35and yes, MySpace.
337. 17:39And I would message with other teenagers
338. 17:41like me who loved country music but just
339. 17:43didn't have anyone singing from their
340. 17:44perspective.
341. 17:46Having journalists write indepth,
342. 17:49oftentimes critical pieces about who
343. 17:51they perceived me to be made me feel
344. 17:54like I was living in some weird
345. 17:56simulation.
346. 17:58But it also made me look inward to learn
347. 18:01about who I actually am.
348. 18:03Having the world treat my love life like
349. 18:06a spectator sport in which I lose every
350. 18:09single game was not a great way to date
351. 18:12in my teens and 20s.
352. 18:14But it taught me to protect my private
353. 18:17life fiercely.
354. 18:20Being publicly humiliated over and over
355. 18:22again at a young age was excruciatingly
356. 18:25painful. But it forced me to devalue the
357. 18:29ridiculous notion of minuteby minute
358. 18:32ever fluctuating social relevance and
359. 18:35likability.
360. 18:38[Applause]
361. 18:47Getting cancelled on the internet and
362. 18:50nearly losing my career gave me an
363. 18:52excellent knowledge of all the types of
364. 18:55wine.
365. 18:58[Applause]
366. 19:02I know I sound like a consumate
367. 19:05optimist, but I'm really not. I lose
368. 19:08perspective all the time. Sometimes
369. 19:12everything just feels completely
370. 19:15pointless.
371. 19:17I know the pressure of living your life
372. 19:19through the lens of perfectionism.
373. 19:23And I know that I'm talking to a group
374. 19:25of perfectionists because you are here
375. 19:27today graduating from NYU.
376. 19:31[Applause]
377. 19:36So this might be hard for you to hear.
378. 19:40In your life, you will inevitably
379. 19:44misspeak, trust the wrong person,
380. 19:48underreact,
381. 19:50overreact, hurt the people who didn't
382. 19:52deserve it, overthink, not think at all.
383. 19:57Self-sabotage.
384. 19:59Create a reality where only your
385. 20:01experience exists.
386. 20:03Ruin perfectly good moments for yourself
387. 20:05and others. Deny any wrongdoing. not
388. 20:08take the steps to make it right. Feel
389. 20:10very guilty. Let the guilt eat at you.
390. 20:13Hit rock bottom. Finally address the
391. 20:16pain you caused. Try to do better next
392. 20:18time. Rinse. Repeat.
393. 20:23[Applause]
394. 20:29And I'm not going to lie,
395. 20:31these mistakes will cause you to lose
396. 20:34things.
397. 20:36I'm trying to tell you that losing
398. 20:38things doesn't just mean losing. A lot
399. 20:42of the time when we lose things, we gain
400. 20:46things, too.
401. 20:48Now, you leave the structure and
402. 20:49framework of school and chart your own
403. 20:52path.
404. 20:54Every choice you make leads to the next
405. 20:56choice which leads to the next. And I
406. 20:58know it's hard to know which path to
407. 21:01take. There will be times in life where
408. 21:03you need to stand up for yourself.
409. 21:06Times when the right thing is actually
410. 21:08to back down and apologize.
411. 21:11Times when the right thing is to fight.
412. 21:13Times when the right thing is to turn
413. 21:15and run.
414. 21:17Times to hold on with all you have. And
415. 21:20times to let go with grace.
416. 21:23Sometimes the right thing to do is to
417. 21:25throw out the old schools of thought in
418. 21:27the name of progress and reform.
419. 21:30Sometimes the right thing to do is to
420. 21:33sit and listen to the wisdom of those
421. 21:35who have come before us. How will you
422. 21:38know what the right choice is in these
423. 21:41crucial moments?
424. 21:43You won't. How do I give advice to this
425. 21:46many people about their life choices?
426. 21:50I won't. The scary news is
427. 21:53you're on your own now. But the cool
428. 21:56news is
429. 21:58you're on your own now.
430. 22:01[Applause]
431. 22:08I leave you with this. We are led by our
432. 22:12gut instincts, our intuition, our
433. 22:15desires and fears, our scars and our
434. 22:18dreams.
435. 22:20And you will screw it up sometimes.
436. 22:23So will I.
437. 22:25And when I do, you will most likely read
438. 22:27about it on the internet.
439. 22:30Anyway, hard things will happen to us.
440. 22:33We will recover. We will learn from it.
441. 22:37We will grow more resilient because of
442. 22:39it. And as long as we are fortunate
443. 22:42enough to be breathing,
444. 22:44we will breathe in, breathe through,
445. 22:48breathe deep, and breathe out. And I am
446. 22:52a doctor now, so I know how breathing
447. 22:54works.
448. 22:57I hope you know
449. 23:01how proud I am to share this day with
450. 23:05you. We're doing this together. So,
451. 23:08let's just keep dancing like we're the
452. 23:11class of 22.